Pearl - HE'S CRYIN WHILE SHE'S CHEATIN LOL

00:00:00.000 men at least can admit in general that they have like character flaws yeah or like women we just 1.00

00:00:05.200 have a hard time saying you know some aspects of me not great yeah what up guys welcome to my

00:00:11.360 reaction series today we have a awesome guest on the channel we have bunny at fort worth playboys

00:00:18.000 missus so welcome to the show hello hello um so how first question how did you get into this

00:00:26.560 red pill stuff would you consider yourself a red pill content creator uh i think that that's the

00:00:32.240 closest match i'm gonna say i'm gonna say yes on that one of my favorite takes of yours

00:00:40.720 i don't know who came up with this but you you kind of it was either you or fort worth playboy

00:00:45.600 but he said he i think he said he got it from you um that women that lose their virginities

00:00:52.320 at a later age are very weird and like something's off there's just something off about it no and um

00:01:02.320 i thought that was such a good observation because i was in um a very religious church for a while

00:01:09.120 and they're everywhere there oh my god they're so yeah it's a unique it's definitely a unique

00:01:15.360 subset of people i would say but but i will i will say no different than men who lose their

00:01:22.400 virginity very late it's there's just an awkwardness there there's a reason oftentimes

00:01:28.720 that that happens and whether it's male or female so that's true there's no takers yeah yeah

00:01:36.320 okay so today we're reacting um to a guy who talks about why he got divorced at 22.

00:01:42.160 oh okay okay so we're gonna react and then if you have anything to say just talk and i'll pause it

00:01:48.600 okay okay all right okay ladies and general people um i'd say he's like a conventionally

00:01:55.560 attractive guy to start he's very cute very cute guy this is how i became divorced at 22 years old

00:02:03.220 this is going to be very simplified i would rather undershare than overshare i have reached out to

00:02:09.560 uh members uh friends and family members uh both myself and my ex-wife to find the best way to do

00:02:16.200 this and we all pretty much came to the same conclusion of do not share more than is needed

00:02:23.680 but if at some point i feel the need to elaborate um i might do that there might be longer versions

00:02:29.380 of this with breakdowns and parts i don't think he's doing a good job of not sharing too much

00:02:34.960 Like that was a five minute introduction.

00:02:39.000 Yeah, I know.

00:02:39.880 So what do you, what do you think of this new trend of people sharing everything online?

00:02:44.060 Well, I think that, you know, we all think that the world is just deeply interested in

00:02:50.420 what we have to say and where we used to call a buddy or we used to call like cry with our

00:02:57.200 friends or whatever.

00:02:58.340 now we literally sit alone in a room hit hit record and broadcast yeah i mean granted i'm as

00:03:06.900 guilty as the next person but i definitely think that there's something odd about just wanting to

00:03:13.400 share so much personal life with just anybody like this guy i mean my first response is before he even

00:03:21.620 starts talking is oh you want us all to know you're single again okay check uh you're adorable

00:03:27.420 you're adorable so clearly you know no problem i'm sure tons of people immediately reached into

00:03:34.680 his dms and he hasn't even really announced anything yet i'm wondering if maybe i find

00:03:40.800 that announcements like this are for couples that built their brand together that's fair

00:03:45.900 you're like i don't know i don't know if this is the case because i've never seen him before but

00:03:51.060 yeah like this to me looks like i don't know if you ever this might be like a my generation thing

00:03:56.700 when david well i'm definitely not of your generation david dobrik and eliza broke up

00:04:02.660 like broke the internet because they were like an internet couple and when they broke we all broke

00:04:08.660 too the equivalent of that would be like if chip and joanna gaines broke up yeah and and my people

00:04:15.760 would be heartbroken so i got married um may 17th of this year oh brand new and shortly before that

00:04:24.940 my wife or ex-wife started a new job and that's important to know so we end up moving into our

00:04:35.120 apartment together in mid-july i believe it's july 16th between the marriage when we got married in

00:04:41.520 that time we were living with my parents so we move in about two weeks after that my wife has

00:04:47.460 just a breakdown comes in my office has a breakdown about i feel like we might have rushed into this

00:04:52.280 we did things too soon blah blah blah blah and it wasn't like a we need to split it was just i'm

00:04:56.780 freaking out say okay let's talk through it um and about a week later she apologized says hey i think

00:05:03.220 i was just having kind of a mental breakdown i'm like hey that's fine you know i get it in scary

00:05:07.040 times you know i had a freak out uh i think it was like the third night that we were sitting in the

00:05:10.380 apartment just about like you know missing my family um so sometimes what what is with

00:05:18.120 i don't know i want to hear like i'm so tired of every little thing just just making people fall

00:05:27.460 apart like where where is the i don't know the the mental toughness like these people were

00:05:35.040 getting married and yet they're falling apart over getting being in their own place or whatever

00:05:42.120 like this is i'm already like i just dislike this guy this is this is before the kids have even come

00:05:48.440 yet exactly like there's no stress yet there's nothing happening yeah let's and this is influent

00:05:55.560 let's time goes on and uh now we're in august and there's another freak out and it's i feel

00:06:04.680 like we rush into this bubble well we meet with our premarital counselor well our counselors i

00:06:09.160 guess uh isn't it crazy that our generation we're not even married yet we're getting counseling

00:06:14.040 was that that's not a good sign was that a thing like 20 years ago we did fine we did fine

00:06:26.840 counseling was like deal with it exactly your parents if you felt like you needed counseling

00:06:33.800 in in my generation it was or in my parents even it was like uh you need to go home to your wife

00:06:40.520 your your your wife needs you like or you know nope you you made this bed you're gonna go home 0.97

00:06:46.120 and you're gonna you're gonna be there 151 okay so he's got 55 000 followers interesting it might

00:06:53.560 it might have been like a internet couple or something they're like hey this is super common

00:06:58.840 You know, we see this in young married couples all the time.

00:07:02.240 Let's, you know, set some some expectations for one another just so you guys can help each other out.

00:07:06.140 And we did. And I think what do you see as the problems that couples have early on in marriage?

00:07:13.760 I think I think the biggest problem is they.

00:07:18.920 And I mean, I got married young, make no mistake, like I I got married young, but I was like one of those who was like a little too mature for her age.

00:07:26.740 So it was like, well, of course she's getting married.

00:07:28.780 And of course she wants to go on and start a family and all that stuff. 1.00

00:07:31.420 But what I see with like couples now who are getting married, and this is true even into

00:07:36.800 like 30 year olds or so.

00:07:38.460 I mean, it's a, it's a broad spectrum.

00:07:40.880 I would say that they are so used to being coddled for lack of a better way to say it,

00:07:49.340 but they're so used to living under this super protection of essentially my generation and

00:07:56.300 the generation ahead of me of parents that they genuinely don't know how to do anything. They

00:08:03.880 don't know how to do stuff. So it is, I could see it would be very scary to have your own place,

00:08:12.400 be responsible for another human being. You're suddenly supposed to act like an adult when

00:08:18.780 you've never had any lessons or experience in being an adult. Yeah, that's true. And that's

00:08:24.840 why, I mean, I have, I have to pull the mom card here. Like I have kids from 26 to 18 and I always

00:08:32.960 said, I'm not raising children. I'm raising my children to be adults and they're all productive

00:08:39.060 members of society. They're all, you know, I mean, we all have our stuff, but like my kids don't get

00:08:46.460 scared for being alone and having their own rent. Yeah, no, I think, um, cause I grew up in a pretty

00:08:53.000 well-off family so we had nannies and stuff so there's a lot of stuff i did not know how to do

00:08:57.720 until i became an adult and so i just spent a lot of my early 20s like figuring out how to do it

00:09:03.960 like i did not know how to cook i was messy like it was just bad

00:09:10.280 but but i don't see a lot of people taking initiative to like learn it on their own no

00:09:15.960 believe it because i was so messy growing up she'll go to my apartment she's like what hat 1.00

00:09:19.800 like how is this clean now and i'm like i love that i'm sorry i'm sorry i didn't mean to torture

00:09:25.400 you guys all right let's see my head things are going great all right so right now the marriage

00:09:32.300 is going okay they crash out a little bit but it's nothing too bad okay so monday september 15th

00:09:38.060 rolls around and i leave work a little early she tells me that she wants me to come home so we can

00:09:41.800 talk and so we go home or i go home and i get there and she's like hey like i'm not ready to

00:09:46.180 talk just yet go play the game so i'm like okay i play the game for an hour go back in hey i'm

00:09:50.240 not ready to talk just yet go play the game okay go back in for now whatever so basically she tells

00:09:54.580 me um like hey i uh like i don't know i don't want to talk about this i think that it's it's

00:10:01.280 just not worth talking about and me being an anxious person i'm like well is it is it something 0.89

00:10:04.980 small or is it something like you you want to do you think if a girl does that that's a shit test 1.00

00:10:09.340 to see how he reacts i think i think a lot of things girls do is a shit test so i'm gonna say 0.99

00:10:14.480 yes. But I also think that this is a couple, of course, only hearing his side, a couple that 0.95

00:10:23.540 genuinely doesn't know how to communicate or express their feelings. They're so in their

00:10:30.660 heads. She could probably turn on a camera or her phone and give every explanation for what 0.95

00:10:39.180 she's dealing with she could probably talk it out and have a wonderful conversation but because it's

00:10:45.360 another human being she's completely incapable yeah and my generation because i got social media 0.85

00:10:52.420 when i was in eighth grade okay he looks younger than me so i mean they like we have a whole

00:10:59.600 generation of people that don't talk they text i think 50 percent of gen z communication is a

00:11:04.540 digital. Isn't that crazy? I believe it. It's not higher. Yeah. And she's just kind of like,

00:11:11.240 I don't really know. I don't know. I, I, I feel like, you know, there's just so many things

00:11:17.680 happen so quick and I don't know. Well, either way, um, we, we talked through things a little

00:11:23.420 bit. I think she can tell that I'm upset. She could tell that I was upset. So she just kind

00:11:27.500 of dialed back. Maybe, I don't know. I don't know where her mind space is or head space is 0.95

00:11:30.620 well the following saturday rolls around everything's all hunky-dory for me i go with

00:11:35.340 my buddy we we put out some bags of corn and stuff and then um i get home that's such a guy

00:11:41.120 i think just said everything's fine for me everything everything i was fine i guess she

00:11:50.380 wasn't when i get divorced that's like always like i thought we were good you know exactly

00:11:56.380 exactly i had no idea we had the issues she's like hey when you need me home tell her and she's 0.99

00:12:02.420 okay great like i'm gonna take a shower i'll see you when you're home i'll get home she's got her 0.99

00:12:06.040 bags packed hey i'm gonna stay with my mom i need some space away i might be back wednesday i don't

00:12:12.600 know uh can we talk nope gone out there gone poof gone uh no contact that sunday that monday

00:12:21.340 then tuesday night i finally call her now mind you in between this she's i'm over at my best

00:12:26.240 friend's house like i don't know what's going on i'm freaking out and uh i say no contact there

00:12:32.120 were a couple texts then um well she also goes over there and is with him and and his girlfriend

00:12:36.980 and just talking to them and it's you know they're trying to figure out what's going on and they're

00:12:40.620 asking the questions hey is there anything going on it might be calls and is there anything you

00:12:44.100 she's like no nothing well so tuesday night i call her and this is what do you think's her issue

00:12:52.460 as of now what's your guess i think that she is thinking about a guy that she should have dated

00:13:00.900 and said she should have given another chance she maybe he reached out like i i honestly think

00:13:08.140 she's disappointed that she's locked herself into this one yeah yeah all right let's see i'll meet

00:13:16.980 the date yeah so tuesday the 23rd of september i call her and things seem well and i'm like hey

00:13:24.440 do you want to go out tomorrow she's like yeah so her and i go out we have a great dinner and

00:13:29.900 she tells me like look i've decided i'm not going to give up i'm not going to run away like we're

00:13:33.700 going to work on this together i can't i can't leave you i don't want to leave you i'm not going

00:13:36.940 to leave you awesome but you need to do this and this and this and this and this and mind you

00:13:44.080 everything's been fairly normal for me up to this point up until her leaving um other than all these

00:13:50.760 freak outs he keeps having also make no mistake like this guy already is kind of annoying me

00:13:58.900 in that i would not be able to be in relationship with him granted he's like 30 years younger than

00:14:05.180 me but still like just the he's a little too feelings driven anyway he's having all these

00:14:13.400 freak outs he's anxious he's having all these problems dealing with the fact that they're

00:14:19.880 married and all these things and yet he's I don't really I thought I thought he was he kind of was

00:14:27.240 saying he was fine and she was crashing out yeah you're saying that's not like the other side well

00:14:32.780 yeah he was fine when he's putting deer corn out but like he has had a couple of different times

00:14:39.440 like on day three of them in their own place like he was he was freaking out and I'm like

00:14:44.360 what does that mean first of all what does that actually look like are you internally freaking

00:14:49.040 out are you just having some stress are you like showing like showing your yourself to her

00:14:56.340 what does this look like whenever you two are each freaking out because he keeps kind of using this

00:15:01.960 blanket yeah that's true what what type of crash out we talking yeah how crashed out

00:15:08.400 let's see i want to see what what is her issue yeah so i put myself in therapy i get couples 0.64

00:15:14.100 therapy for the two of us i'm paying out the butt for it but you know whatever oh no you're going to 0.84

00:15:18.320 couples therapy in the first year not a good sign i just can't imagine that it ends in like i've

00:15:24.600 never you know you're you tell me have you ever had a couple go to therapy and it get better

00:15:29.680 Nope, I haven't. And I, and I'm, and I say that I'm not anti-therapy, but no, oftentimes, because once you are there, I think that there's already so many issues and there's so much resentment and hate and anger and bitterness that therapy is, is almost a lost cause, I think.

00:15:53.780 Yeah, it's better to start, it's just better to start anew.

00:15:57.240 Yeah.

00:15:57.860 Okay, let's see.

00:15:58.680 this is necessary whatever whatever means um she's like i'm not ready to move back in yet

00:16:03.420 but you know we'll see so we have our first therapy session that following sunday

00:16:07.440 and just to kind of collapse all this down eventually after like a week or so she moves

00:16:12.100 back in things are going great i'm cooking dinner every single night right she did almost nothing

00:16:16.540 around the apartment and i would complain about that because it's like you know but i was like

00:16:21.220 you know what i don't care cooking cleaning everything laundry everything i'm doing everything

00:16:26.160 right i like made up her closet for her and stuff and whatever i'm just like i'm trying to show her

00:16:30.320 whatever it is that you need i'm gonna do and i just start working on my myself and start trying

00:16:35.680 to be you know the best husband that i could possibly be and it's stuff that i should have

00:16:39.440 been doing beforehand but it's like you know yeah but she's holding the frame and the relationship

00:16:43.440 now yeah now now she has she knows she has control you're cooked my guy completely you're

00:16:51.680 cooked you can't react this is my first time i'm a kid well three weeks go by let me go back to my

00:16:59.040 text to figure out the date so mind you during this time too she's like trying to get me to 1.00

00:17:04.160 buy her a new car and like a gaming pc and we're coming on all the i mean it's amazing

00:17:09.440 it was it was it was it seemed like the most perfect marriage well sunday october 12th rolls

00:17:13.360 around and things have been going great we have our therapy session therapist is like guys i think

00:17:19.600 think we made a breakthrough and we're laughing giggling whatever well therapy session ends she

00:17:24.820 looks at me hey i'm dropping on nursing school hmm when did you when did you make that decision

00:17:30.480 she's like last week it's like okay she's a nurse that's not good that's not good

00:17:37.080 oh man all right okay all right i support you that's a big decision

00:17:43.260 you know that gives us more time to spend together you know i guess work through these

00:17:48.180 things are right down anxiety full-on just freaking out my jump to is hey let's pray let's

00:17:55.300 pray she doesn't want to she goes jumps in the shower she's free i can't do this i can't do this

00:18:00.540 i can't do this i thought i could i thought i could whatever and i'm like hey let's get in the

00:18:03.660 car because car rides always calmed her down let's get in the car and ride around she's like a baby

00:18:08.880 you put her in the car to calm her down and is he is he gonna just drive around in circles around

00:18:14.180 the city yeah i mean this does not seem like an emotionally mature woman no well and did you did

00:18:22.820 you catch or has he said like what their age demographics are like i feel like she's younger

00:18:30.020 even than he is yeah he's 22 so she's probably younger than that okay i would i would guess

00:18:36.660 i think they met in church so maybe like 20. it's just it's just 20. i've been doing xy xy

00:18:48.340 and i go have you been cheating and she looks at me yeah you were right you caught it yeah you were

00:18:54.980 right i feel like a lot of people saw that one coming yeah because if women are like randomly 1.00

00:19:03.780 crashing out it's i think it's a lot of times it's like the guilt because like exactly i don't

00:19:09.620 even know if we think women don't feel guilt but we kind of do and then it's like a crash out and

00:19:14.260 that you know like when women are acting erratic it's usually we're doing something wrong yeah and 0.98

00:19:19.860 we we know you know i mean it's not we don't do this stuff and and think it's right we do this

00:19:26.420 stuff and we want it to satisfy us but we still know deep down that we're doing the wrong thing

00:19:33.060 i actually attended a wedding one time where the bride was actively having an affair

00:19:41.060 and gee no surprise three days after the wedding after the whole shindig went through with the

00:19:48.020 whole thing she called it off she's like i've been cheating like what i mean did you know

00:19:56.500 i didn't know at the wedding that this was happening no okay but but i but i never spoke

00:20:03.480 to her again once i found out i was i was so like you have got to be kidding me really so

00:20:10.220 were you friends with the guy i'm guessing i was friends with the with the girl oh you're

00:20:15.580 friends with her again yeah i i and if she had come to me i would have said don't do this like

00:20:23.660 that's either break up, break up with one or the other, but this is, this is a sham. But I mean,

00:20:29.100 I'm sure that this girl, and, and here's the real thing. He probably doesn't even know the

00:20:36.120 whole story. Like he knows what she's okay with him knowing in order to get her out of it. But

00:20:42.940 she, he still won't know the whole story and it never will. But the likelihood is she was cheating

00:20:48.200 the entire time never broke it off correct and she's telling him because she knows that he won't

00:20:53.960 end it yeah because like you know what i mean like why would she tell him like if she was really

00:21:00.300 afraid of him leaving or maybe she wants him to leave i guess we'll see we'll see with who 0.98

00:21:05.880 it's her boss damn boss that's just so classic nurse i know 1.00

00:21:13.160 that's that's classic you know i growing up i had one friend whose mother cheated and she was a 0.99

00:21:22.480 nurse i don't know what it is about nurses because like she didn't even cheat with anyone at work 1.00

00:21:29.740 she cheated with the neighbor maybe it's like the work schedule i think so i think that that's i

00:21:34.280 mean firefighters are notorious for that kind of thing police are notorious for that kind of thing 0.88

00:21:39.460 nurses you know anytime you work even even like down to like the entertainments and things like

00:21:46.760 that i mean you work an erratic schedule you work different from other people it gives you freedom

00:21:52.560 number one yeah you know you have freedom in times that other people don't have freedom and

00:21:58.800 it's just like they both they tend to be incestuous anyway one of something crazy so this girl um her 0.99

00:22:07.080 all the kids knew and they didn't tell the dad because like they knew from a young age that the

00:22:13.080 mom would crash out if she's like isn't that crazy and i she did my i was friends with the girl and 0.97

00:22:18.840 she didn't even tell me that is a lot on those kids shoulders you know that those kids are not

00:22:24.260 mentally healthy no they're not from that i mean the girl like they kind of woke up later but like

00:22:30.420 yeah like when they're kids and you say don't tell dad like what i mean the kid's gonna do what mom

00:22:35.580 says right that is rough that is rough that is no way for children to be yeah and then she

00:22:43.140 she ended up leaving and like dating and they're i don't know if they stayed together for a while

00:22:48.200 the neighbor though yeah it's kind of awkward they were going to like fam like not family but

00:22:52.220 like functions at the school we're like wow what a time yeah crazy that is wild yeah oh my gosh

00:23:01.320 and the dad was super nice too like he was really nice but all right let's see and it was crazy

00:23:07.740 because the dad was really good looking like exactly like weird decisions like that yeah it's

00:23:14.880 nothing to do with the guy yeah i mean sometimes he's super simpy but sometimes he did nothing like

00:23:20.180 what did tom brady do yeah seriously who would cheat on tom brady so there yeah

00:23:25.520 so so yeah so she says that and you know i've always been a very emotional person but in that

00:23:37.820 moment you were right ah no kidding dude tell us something we don't know he kind of fits the

00:23:45.220 archetype of christian guys they tend to be really emotional i've spent a lot of times in

00:23:49.860 those churches and like especially if they're at protestant churches because that's like all

00:23:54.760 emotional is like catholicism orthodox it's a little more stoic but like it's you're you're

00:24:00.580 dealing with concerts at a lot of the non-denominational churches well and that's

00:24:04.560 pretty interesting to me because i mean of course i follow a lot of your stuff and my protestant

00:24:10.320 church experience is is so much different from yours like and in my experience the men are strong

00:24:18.580 masculine leaders of their family in a respectful way but you know it's it's but I say that with a

00:24:28.140 grain of salt knowing that I've also been as an adult been to more of like the mega church you

00:24:34.360 know like kind of vibe and it is it's like going to a concert every every sunday you got to look

00:24:41.560 at the congregation if it's like 75 women cooked it's true it's so true yeah yeah um no i knew i

00:24:51.000 knew it was cooked because when i was in the church out there i did i was single man and i

00:24:55.060 did a dating event and it was like 90 women 10 men exactly and then they say you can't date

00:25:00.880 outside of the church i'm like what the am i supposed to do i'm not oh my god i'm like i'm

00:25:04.720 not 10 top 10 hottest here where where am i supposed to go like that is stringent that would

00:25:12.480 be a lot to ask no it's really crazy because it's like they they tell women to not have sex and a

00:25:19.440 lot of them are not virgins anymore and that's just a tough sell so there's like two chads in

00:25:24.720 the church that like two or three that like marry off usually young and then you just got these old

00:25:29.920 single women that are i mean i don't know if they're putting out they probably are but like 1.00

00:25:34.080 on paper saying they're not putting out it's like who's gonna buy that exactly and i was like 22 or

00:25:40.960 23 at the time and i remember i went on a church retreat and it was all these old single awkward

00:25:46.720 women i'm like i saw the writing on the wall i was like i gotta get out of here i do not want to be 1.00

00:25:51.040 that yeah i was like i gotta get out well and i mean i've got all kinds of i can't i've got all

00:25:56.720 kinds of beef with the mentality of of being a virgin when you're married also unless you're

00:26:03.840 like an 18 year old virgin or something like married person because you're supposed to suddenly

00:26:09.760 be a vixen and suddenly be like like a switch flips on your wedding night like suddenly you

00:26:16.960 know what to do and you know how to satisfy your man and you know you're going to be completely

00:26:22.400 comfortable in all these different scenarios. You know, it's just, it's a lot to ask. It's no

00:26:28.240 wonder, you know, it's no wonder females get a bad rap for being emotional. And I mean, there's 1.00

00:26:34.740 a lot of guilt that we just kind of deal with for pretty much everything we do. Yeah, no. You know

00:26:42.360 what's funny? So when I was young, I did the whole Catholic school thing. So the purity thing,

00:26:49.320 like i actually tried to wait till marriage but it was like none of the guys that wanted to wait

00:26:53.720 were cute i was like yeah okay that's cute it's gonna do you know so i i um but anyways my when

00:27:02.440 i got older my um my parents that's what they said just wait till marriage i get older and i find out

00:27:08.360 my parents had a teen pregnancy and i had a brother that i didn't know about so i i didn't

00:27:13.800 find out about him until i was like 22 or 23 yeah yeah and i told my mom i'm like mom

00:27:20.440 you should have why didn't you tell me to do what you did to get pregnant 1.00

00:27:27.960 i'm like i'm like you got to marry the best guy in the world my dad exactly you hit the jackpot

00:27:35.160 by doing it wrong i know and i was like you did it by getting pregnant you told me you told me

00:27:41.240 to go to school go to college and try to sell and and yeah like college age guys that are 0.99

00:27:50.020 attractive the ugly ones will do it but the attractive one they're not gonna wait for shit 1.00

00:27:54.240 there's 10 exactly hotter than you that are gonna put out like that is actually hilarious 0.99

00:28:00.600 i know my mom's like well like and that's what they're that's what they'll do they'll say well

00:28:07.200 well i should have did it the other way i'm like yeah but you didn't because that didn't work

00:28:10.880 exactly because that would not have worked out the same and i told i i said the same thing to

00:28:17.720 my dad i was like dad and i'm and he's like no that doesn't mean it worked i'm like well

00:28:22.380 guess it did all evidence to the contrary

00:28:26.080 that is awesome like you guys at 30 year marriage all you would do is get pregnant 0.99

00:28:34.600 and it was funny i ran to my little sister i'm like eva download tinder

00:28:39.280 we gotta get out there

00:28:44.320 i mean i was kind of kidding with the tinder but like it's hilarious oh that's funny but i'm like

00:28:53.060 if you're gonna sell purity you can't do it to college age guys because like mom you told me

00:28:57.080 not to date older you could sell purity to a guy 10 years older but on a college campus i'm like mom

00:29:03.220 there was six women to four men on my college campus oh my gosh i'm cute but i'm not the

00:29:10.700 hottest chick that you don't like my personality will only get me so far 1.00

00:29:16.180 these guys want the gluck gluck 9000

00:29:19.380 that is awesome and you don't at the church they say not to do that either

00:29:26.920 yeah i have i have some of those same experiences with my parents but yeah

00:29:32.460 oh my mom is a different time uh exactly yeah it's always a different time that's the go-to

00:29:39.420 oh it was different then well i had um i had a different i had a different sister or

00:29:45.660 and i like she wanted to wait till marriage and i'm like well you got to go older because these

00:29:50.840 guys in school they're not going to do it right now maybe if you get this guy but he was a little 0.97

00:29:55.420 out of your league chica so you gotta like i'm just being pragmatic i mean you could shoot you 1.00

00:30:03.520 know yeah exactly but you know i couldn't cry i couldn't get angry all i could do was drive

00:30:09.320 and in my head i'm just praying while listening and trying to talk and basically she says uh i

00:30:17.720 find out over time that she had started emotionally cheating which let's just call it she started

00:30:22.720 cheating uh two weeks after we moved into our apartment um so mind you this is two months

00:30:27.280 after we get married and that if we do the timeline here that's when the first freak 0.96

00:30:32.560 out happened which came into my office yeah and we called it that's what we said yeah

00:30:38.240 seriously yeah then um apparently it was just that and then and it's the word like

00:30:46.400 women try to rationalize like we want it to be something defective with the guy 1.00

00:30:50.880 yeah and so it's like i did this bad thing but i can't be a bad person it can't be a character flaw

00:30:55.920 oh no exactly character do you know what i'm not a good person like men at least can admit in

00:31:02.000 general that they have like character flaws yeah we're like women we just have a hard time saying

00:31:06.880 you know some aspects of me not great yeah it's true it's true 100 and so we try to blame the guy

00:31:15.040 towards the time of the second freak out before she moved out was when they had started making

00:31:20.480 plans to be physical um and then during the time between the that freak out and her moving out is

00:31:30.280 when they actually did have a level of physical physical relation um and then mind you this all

00:31:39.100 comes out the day before I'm supposed to hop on a flight for a promotion that I just received

00:31:42.700 and um yeah she yeah tells me that this has been going on that it's most likely going to continue

00:31:50.860 going on he says most likely going to continue going on yeah she does not care uh no she doesn't

00:32:00.220 care and and make no mistake even though like the job the new job and the new boss and the new

00:32:06.900 relationship and all this stuff all happened essentially at the same time that they were

00:32:11.460 getting physically getting married like the wedding happened and she got a new job kind of

00:32:16.420 like right there together there was this isn't the first time that she has has had thoughts at least

00:32:26.100 about dumping him for another man because it just doesn't come that easily like it just doesn't

00:32:32.380 you're either committed to a person or you're not you're you either have a wondering eye or you

00:32:38.020 don't. And that's a choice that you make. You know, there are always going to be attractive

00:32:44.700 people out there that are not your significant other. There are always going to be people who

00:32:49.940 would get with you. You know, there's, there are always options. So it's a choice. And so this

00:32:57.200 girl is like an easy target. She's a soft target. That's, that's what I'm going for. 1.00

00:33:03.060 Yeah. I mean, she, do you think most cheaters are because it's a character flaw or like,

00:33:10.420 and they'll cheat no matter what relationship they're in? Or do you ever think it's because

00:33:15.580 the guy is too like simpy or like, you know, like too soft? Well, I think that, I think that it does

00:33:22.700 start with the person who's cheating. I really, really do because they, it's, and I don't, I

00:33:29.140 don't, I really don't mean this to be ugly. I think that we have different types and different

00:33:33.500 styles of relationship and, but a person who cheats on that guy will cheat on that guy and

00:33:41.520 then we'll cheat on that guy. And it just is the way it happens. Like it's very difficult to be

00:33:48.060 faithful if you've never been faithful before and it's always worked out. Okay. Yeah. And women, 1.00

00:33:55.200 because men don't really go looking for it so women tend to get away like he probably never

00:34:00.040 would have found out if she didn't tell him it's true she would he would have thought it was all

00:34:04.040 his fault that she keeps like falling apart and he's not strong enough to keep her from falling

00:34:09.000 apart when really there's all this turmoil happening in the background that he has no

00:34:13.680 idea about you ever see a hoe trying so hard to be faithful 1.00

00:34:17.320 there's someone there's no one i'm thinking about and you know she's just she's hoed from a young

00:34:23.860 age you know yeah some women are kind of just born like that they just it's true and i do think that 1.00

00:34:29.700 i mean not of course not knowing who this guy's wife is i bet she is very attractive i'm sure 1.00

00:34:36.980 she's attractive and i'm sure she gets a lot of attention from a lot of people all of the people 1.00

00:34:41.940 that i know personally who have been serial cheaters because i don't know anybody who cheats

00:34:49.060 just once they're all attractive human beings male or female they they're used to talking to

00:34:55.900 a lot of people because they get a lot of positive attention yeah there's you know people talk to

00:35:01.780 them they talk to them you know they're usually pretty extroverted pretty comfortable in public

00:35:07.100 situations with other people and and i know that goes against what i said earlier where she probably

00:35:12.460 could talk to a camera right now and not talk to him but attractive people get a lot of attention 1.00

00:35:20.140 and get a lot of you know yeah well i mean i kind of dealt with this with um i interviewed a thousand

00:35:26.460 people and there's like the the christian guys that always say they wouldn't cheat although a

00:35:31.340 lot of them end up cheating because they get clouded and they're like whoa yeah i thought i

00:35:37.740 was a faithful guy but this these young hot 22 year olds are hitting on me it's true it's true 0.99

00:35:44.700 that's why the pastors always get caught cheating because they might go into it thinking they're not

00:35:49.100 cheaters but you don't really know if you're a cheater until you have attractive ugly options

00:35:53.740 don't really count no that doesn't get like an ugly choice that's like not even a choice you

00:36:00.300 know like somebody like a pastor somebody who's out in front of the crowd that leader is gonna

00:36:06.460 get hit on no matter what he looks like no matter if he's the biggest dweeb or the hottest stud in

00:36:12.540 the room if he's up on that stage you know directing the crowd he is going to have options 0.95

00:36:20.220 oh yeah oh yeah women love banging pastors that's why i think they keep a lot of these 1.00

00:36:24.620 single women in church she's like i need options here oh that's awful and that's why they sell the 1.00

00:36:31.820 born again virgins because he's like he's like okay i've done with these side chicks i've done

00:36:37.580 i gotta do something with them that church men waiting for marriage that is so funny

00:36:46.780 yeah and yeah not crying about it not upset about it um actually i'll i'll just tell you guys

00:36:56.620 laughing at my crying because eventually i do start crying of course she's like look let's

00:37:01.580 Let's go back to the apartment, which I'll be there.

00:37:05.620 And I'm like, okay.

00:37:07.360 We get back to the apartment.

00:37:08.340 She's like, look, I need to call him.

00:37:11.080 Mind you, I'm falling apart.

00:37:12.860 Look, I need to call him.

00:37:14.680 I need to make sure he's okay.

00:37:18.520 Hmm?

00:37:19.760 So she leaves for two hours while it's like 12 o'clock at night.

00:37:23.880 I can't sleep.

00:37:24.600 I can't do anything, right?

00:37:25.660 I have a flight to catch the next morning.

00:37:26.880 I can't do anything.

00:37:27.440 I'm falling apart.

00:37:28.300 That girl's getting railed and he's crying.

00:37:31.580 she's off having a booty call like there yeah she's he's she didn't go call him she went and 0.96

00:37:40.080 called on him yeah cooked it's cooked sorry my guy so i get like two hours sleep wake up get on a

00:37:47.920 flight and absolutely bomb do terrible right because how could you do well and during this

00:37:54.100 week while i'm gone all i'm thinking of is okay how am i gonna fix this how am i gonna fix this

00:37:59.060 know how i'm gonna okay do you know what um fort worth playboy had a tweet that um i just thought

00:38:07.300 of now how what ruins more marriages is being unlikable over cheating because when you think

00:38:14.500 about ed because a wife that impacts you every single day if she cheats on business trips 1.00

00:38:23.060 it does and i'm not saying you should right but i'm just from a pragmatic point of view i'm like 0.93

00:38:27.380 it's it's like worse to be a bitch that's a lot of like a lot of really likable women they tend 1.00

00:38:33.760 to cheat a lot or not I don't know maybe they don't always do it but like um they get away 0.99

00:38:40.800 with cheating more I'll say absolutely they're pleasant to be around and it's like a lot of

00:38:46.340 sight out of mind to some degree 1000 yeah yeah so how do you forget I don't know if she is she 0.99

00:38:54.140 doesn't seem like it but i was just i was just thinking about because you guys both i could tell

00:38:58.560 you get your content from the real world and not just online because a lot of your points are like

00:39:03.680 i'm like that is true well and it helps that we are both personal trainers and so we are out

00:39:10.920 in the world a lot like we're dealing with and we're seeing you know relationships come and go

00:39:17.580 we're seeing all kinds of stuff happen there's a lot of a lot of life that happens in a training

00:39:23.580 facility. And it's really interesting to have kind of a, a firsthand experience of it, a firsthand

00:39:29.580 knowledge. And so many of these people sharing with us at the same time. So yeah, we get a lot

00:39:36.860 of, a lot of real world. If a guy has 10 female clients, how many does he hook up with? You know,

00:39:46.100 that's funny. Cause that really has kind of been a hot topic lately. And I, I'm going to say,

00:39:51.960 first of all, it depends on the market, like 1000%. I will say that personal training is

00:40:01.680 similar to, um, restaurant business, things like that. It's incestuous. Yeah. Uh, you know,

00:40:10.040 personal trainers, we're going to spend a lot more time with the other personal trainers in

00:40:16.480 the facility. We're going to, I mean, there's, there's one girl who works at our facility

00:40:24.240 and I swear she has banged every male trainer in the facility at some point in her tenure there. 1.00

00:40:33.280 Yeah. You guys are all good looking. That's kind of what everybody's fit. Everybody's got higher

00:40:37.960 testosterone. Everybody, you know, we look at bodies all day, every day. Like, yeah, it's,

00:40:44.360 it's a hot environment uh it's kind of like physical therapy there are no there are no ugly

00:40:49.540 physical therapists like uh and please don't start sending me pictures of ugly physical therapists 1.00

00:40:54.460 i'm sure they exist but i i don't know that many who bang their own um clients oh because 0.97

00:41:03.600 it's the other trainers more yeah you don't shit where you eat and anybody who follows that rule 0.98

00:41:09.880 is not going to bang their clients, no matter how hot they are. Now, I know people who will 0.99

00:41:14.800 not have clients anymore, but will like kind of circle back and they kind of become,

00:41:21.420 they almost get treated like a rotation girl in that they kind of check in on them

00:41:26.940 once they're not clients with the intention of banging. So I will say it's not completely.

00:41:34.000 Okay. What percent do you think they could bang?

00:41:37.320 oh a high percentage high person no no like Fort Worth teases me all the time he just cracks it

00:41:45.560 first of all Fort Worth has not he doesn't have a jealous bone in his body which goes a long way

00:41:50.100 because I'm a personable person we're extroverted we're out there but um he always laughs he's like

00:41:56.980 every male whoever walks through this facility feels the need to touch you at some point while

00:42:02.960 they're here. Like, let's face it. Free speech is a myth. Large social media companies reserve

00:42:09.260 the right to judge and punish any content creators they see fit without due process or warning. How

00:42:14.960 do I know? Because I was demonetized for a year and a half and I had to work my way back from the

00:42:19.640 bottom to where I am today. One thing that my experience taught me is to never rely on one

00:42:23.980 platform for my livelihood again, which is why I created my own website and app, the Audacity

00:42:28.900 Network. Unlike the larger platforms that are bogged down by censorship and changing guidelines,

00:42:34.200 the Audacity Network is an open platform run by me for my supporters. For just $10 a month,

00:42:39.600 you can join a community that can speak their mind and get first access to present and future

00:42:44.200 projects. It's also a place to find my old content as well as to get access to live streams and

00:42:49.440 videos you can only find on my website. So go to theaudacitynetwork.com to become a member or go

00:42:55.020 to the apple store and google store to download the app today i'll see you there i i could i could

00:43:01.320 bang 98 of the males that come in come through the door and it's and i don't mean that to

00:43:07.800 that sounds tackier than it is but i'm fun i'm laughing at their jokes you know

00:43:16.380 i'm there what about the other way around guys with girls clients i'm gonna i'm gonna say it's

00:43:22.580 high i'm gonna say it would be high under the right circumstances you know um i'm gonna say

00:43:28.980 it's easily in the 50 to 60 percent positive range okay i'm gonna say it would be possible

00:43:38.720 it would be possible cool all right let's let's finish this well this poor guy and wow god is good

00:43:47.760 um because though I didn't fix it he kept me functioning uh better than I would have without

00:43:55.860 him and yeah so then I get back she ends up actually picking me up from the airport that

00:44:03.340 Thursday night we hang out uh she drives me back to the apartment goes and stays at her mom's 0.99

00:44:08.700 Friday morning wake up we go on a date it's great we're having a good time it's a little weird but

00:44:14.160 having a good time well eventually we go back to the apartment she falls asleep i go through her

00:44:18.160 phone and it is her and him dogging on me talking about how she's gonna stand my good side so she

00:44:22.560 can get things from me and all sorts of terrible stuff and so i'm like hey wake up you know let's

00:44:28.960 go and she's like oh my gosh did you go through my phone i'm like yeah i did and then oh there's a

00:44:36.800 oh lord wait here we go well we'll do like a few more minutes of this and then move on to the next

00:44:42.800 that is hilarious how he was so determined that this was going to be a quick update parts yeah

00:44:48.800 this is a time i didn't think it was gonna be this long so um yeah so she goes and starts freaking 0.99

00:44:57.920 out and she's like take me home take me home i'm like okay cool um now we are driving home and she

00:45:04.560 saw me you know i really thought i really thought there was a chance i really thought you would

00:45:08.160 change but you going through my phone just shows me the same person what do you think

00:45:12.560 about looking in each other's phones i have zero problem with transparency i mean i i think it's

00:45:20.480 i i think even if you don't ever intend to go through anyone else's phone i think that

00:45:27.760 having the ability keeps people who would otherwise not be on the up and up maybe makes

00:45:36.560 them think twice. I mean, I think transparency in relationships is a good idea in that regard. But

00:45:44.080 I mean, Fort Worth can go through my phone. I don't think he ever has and I would never even

00:45:50.020 think about it. Like it's not even, but I also am not going to flinch every time he goes to pick up

00:45:56.240 my phone or move it or do something the way that some of these couples do. I mean, I love like the

00:46:02.640 trends on on the socials where it's like I pretend to grab her phone or I say hey I'm gonna do this

00:46:10.940 real quick that's just sounds stressful to like freak out anytime he touches your phone because

00:46:18.460 you know there's something in there that that he shouldn't see yeah I mean if people cheat

00:46:24.140 eventually it comes out but truly like what was this girl doing without a lock that he couldn't 0.79

00:46:29.660 get into i mean that's just stupid that i think this girl just was dying to get out of this and 1.00

00:46:38.040 so yeah cheat better i mean if you're gonna cheat i just expected more from you yeah exactly 0.98

00:46:45.040 one thousand percent i just took you on a date spent a bunch of money like had what i thought

00:46:52.500 was a great day and the whole time you're sneaking off to the bathroom to text your boyfriend about

00:46:57.360 how you have to stay on my good side and hoping that he's not upset with you for it so then i turn

00:47:02.940 on her snap maps because i'm crazy i turn her snap maps and sure enough that night chains up

00:47:06.300 this house saturday morning wake up go home pack up all of her stuff nicely not throwing stuff

00:47:11.560 right i just put whatever clothes and stuff into bags and put the other stuff and whatever load up

00:47:15.940 in the back of the truck text her hey what time do you get off work or what time are you gonna be

00:47:18.940 at your mom she tells me okay i pull up got all of her stuff in the truck and she's like can we go

00:47:23.520 get food i'm like you know what let me see how much information i can fish on here um so she

00:47:28.440 knows at this point she found out there's not just what more information do you need she's

00:47:32.320 cheating on you my god exactly i mean it's it's over like i don't this isn't

00:47:39.700 this isn't just like and all of it's wrong right but there's levels of cheating that i would

00:47:45.940 imagine would be more work throughable like this isn't a key message this is a whole boyfriend

00:47:51.460 it's a whole other relationship this wasn't a one night stand never spoke to this is a boyfriend

00:47:57.880 yeah this is she has two boyfriends so yeah yeah um so i'm like where were you last night she's

00:48:05.820 like a friend called me i was upset at you and so you know they called me and i went i was like

00:48:11.500 was it his house she's like yeah i'm like did you sleep with him yeah gotcha so then

00:48:19.360 full transparency we're riding around and she's just like let's just drive let's just go somewhere 0.98

00:48:26.440 let's just wake up and see the sunset somewhere and i'm not gonna overshare but i'm i'm an idiot 1.00

00:48:32.560 i'm an idiot i'm so stupid i'm so dumb i'm so dumb and i'm not even gonna listen what your 0.99

00:48:39.980 mind is thinking that happens exactly yeah i was i mean the whole time i'm like yeah but how many 1.00

00:48:47.140 times did you have like the hottest sex of your life in these moments you know seriously what a 0.99

00:48:54.260 buffoon right so either way i'm spending the night i am spending the night and then sunday i wake up 0.98

00:49:02.240 and i go to church because i'm like god i i need you so which i go to church anyways right but i'm

00:49:08.340 like god so i go to church and i walk in early and i sit there and i just cry in a pew and then

00:49:14.020 i get out of church and to a text from her hey i think she texted me somewhere along the lines of

00:49:18.940 i can't remember what's the text or call she's like hey like come back over i don't like how

00:49:21.760 you left i'm like okay so i went over and i get over there and she just wants to lay down we lay 0.96

00:49:25.100 down and you know what an idiot ah either way okay do you know what i think i've had enough 0.99

00:49:32.520 this guy he got cheated on i think this is cooked so i mean he got cheated on 1.00

00:49:40.340 um and yeah women divorces i don't think she'll regret it a lot of men have this like revenge

00:49:48.980 fantasy and even if you do better date younger and like even if she doesn't do better i feel

00:49:56.140 like once a woman's done with you um she's kind of done maybe in a scenario never existed yeah 0.99

00:50:03.280 maybe in a scenario where she just didn't see you as like a long-term prospect you know like

00:50:07.800 jack and you know titanic scenario you know maybe something like that but yeah in general

00:50:14.580 yeah i don't know i mean everything about this is just

00:50:19.320 maddening i mean first of all he won't have any problem i mean he's by the time this is

00:50:25.540 published he probably has already had like 20 000 dms let me help you feel better yeah exactly

00:50:34.700 Oh, I can't believe you were treated so poorly.

00:50:37.400 Oh, let me just, let me just.

00:50:40.720 Exactly.

00:50:42.780 Let me just, let me just, you know.

00:50:45.660 He's never gotten so many unsolicited pictures in his life.

00:50:51.080 Yeah.

00:50:51.900 Just for being adorable in the first place.

00:50:54.420 But I don't know.

00:50:56.000 I mean, I think this guy, what I hate about guys who,

00:51:01.080 people who get cheated on is it becomes the story.

00:51:03.660 like that becomes what anybody else ever hears about from now on until he finally kind of gets

00:51:11.540 into a good relationship and kind of gets past all this but like it becomes his his story that

00:51:18.540 he tells at every first date that he goes on yeah and and that's not that's not sexy like

00:51:24.980 what girl wants to sit there and go I would be sitting across from him going well I think I know 0.91

00:51:30.940 why you were cheated on first of all you know when i was single once divorced men were always

00:51:37.400 the most desperate that's what i found they were always like they wanted to marry you immediately

00:51:43.260 and i think a lot of it a lot of it's because they can't really let the dream of marriage die

00:51:48.760 and so they want to just feel like oh i just picked the wrong girl it's not women in jail

00:51:53.440 which to some extent they did but they're like very desperate to like because it's a lot of like

00:51:58.780 conservative guys that believe in marriage, you know, I agree. And they're just like ready to

00:52:03.860 marry you immediately. I agree. They're marrying men out there. And that is like, yeah, that is

00:52:10.800 their, their archetype. I mean, that is their persona. Men will walk away from marriage for

00:52:18.560 a little bit, but they'll be back. Yeah. Yeah. Bad divorce. Okay. So the next video we're going

00:52:24.960 cover is um no contact with parents a lot of people in my generation are cutting their parents

00:52:31.520 off and they're going no contact um so my take on and oprah's covering it so she had some a couple

00:52:38.960 on to talk about why they went no contact i think this is from domineering mothers that can't give 0.91

00:52:45.520 up control of their kids that's what i think it is it also could be um soft millennials that's 0.98

00:52:52.880 possible too uh what do you think of that trend in general is that something you've seen in real life

00:52:58.560 um it's it's something i've seen a little bit in real life but not a ton i've heard about it of

00:53:06.480 course over the years and but i definitely i definitely have of the mindset that that's

00:53:13.200 oftentimes because the mother is so caustic can't let no can't let her boy go usually you know 0.79

00:53:22.880 I think that there's just a lot of, there's just a lot of bitterness there.

00:53:32.140 And a lot of times the connection to that kind of side of the family is just doomed to destroy you.

00:53:43.640 And you kind of see that.

00:53:46.240 Yeah, I think a lot of in-laws can ruin relationships. 0.96

00:53:49.440 Completely.

00:53:49.960 you really do marry the family unless you go to such an extreme where you completely divide

00:53:57.640 yourself okay let's see if we i actually haven't seen this yet so let's see if this if we agree or

00:54:03.480 disagree okay number of audience members who are going through this right now so chris and brie

00:54:11.400 what's going on yeah absolutely so i grew up in a very performance oriented household it was

00:54:18.360 attend an ivy league school um get the money the power the status be someone that we can feel proud

00:54:24.360 of and brie very much did not come from that background did you have other siblings in the

00:54:28.120 household too yeah i had two younger brothers okay so i was the oldest i was trailblazing in that way

00:54:32.680 so tell us again you've not had contacts with your your parents now for four years four years

00:54:36.600 that's right so parents and siblings that's right okay nobody in the family uh because the thing is

00:54:42.360 if you have a domineering mother they send the other siblings after you true yeah to control you 0.96

00:54:47.800 we'll see if i we'll see because my guess it's either going to be the wife manipulating the boy

00:54:52.940 to get away from the family or the mother being overly controlling so we're going to see which

00:54:58.620 one i think it is there's some extended family but not not in the core family yeah that's right

00:55:02.960 all right and so when brie and i first got together we very much felt like she was remember

00:55:09.840 my parents were apathetic towards her um they were not super interested in getting to know her and

00:55:14.220 they didn't like her yeah yeah that's that's the feeling that we got that's the short answer that's

00:55:18.780 that's the feeling like her they didn't like her yeah and the way that that really surfaced was a

00:55:22.780 was uh what we perceived as a disinterest in getting to genuinely know her yeah and for you

00:55:28.060 know while we started dating so be it but as it became clear that this was a real relationship

00:55:35.660 that this was an intense relationship that we were in love and i said this is the woman i'm

00:55:38.860 to marry and as we moved into that more serious realm it went from what we perceived as apathy

00:55:46.300 to more of we don't like this and the way that that took form for us was my parents we found

00:55:53.660 through friends were scheduling lunches to have conversation with my friends where the topic was

00:55:59.660 we're worried about chris that was the first thing and then it became can we delay this engagement or

00:56:04.940 Or can we ask your friends? Yes. Or can and can we take this marriage?

00:56:08.720 What's your take? Almost like an intervention. Yeah.

00:56:12.580 Do you think the wife is that bad or it's the parents? I think that 0.95

00:56:16.920 I think that what he's saying is fair, that it doesn't sound like the parents

00:56:21.120 really even gave her a chance to even get to know her.

00:56:24.980 Yeah. And it's his choice to make, you know, I mean,

00:56:29.280 I've had it like there's been points where I maybe didn't

00:56:33.400 like the siblings you know because i'm one of ten so yeah i i didn't maybe approve or like the

00:56:40.600 siblings significant other but it's not really my choice to make and if you know there's been

00:56:46.360 times where maybe i dated somebody they didn't like and i appreciated the ability to make my

00:56:50.760 own mistake you know uh because you're the one that's gonna have to be accountable like you're

00:56:55.800 the one that's if if it's really a bad fit you'll have to deal with the consequence no one else

00:56:59.800 Well, and I'm an only child, so I've dealt with none of that. But in my own mothering and my own children, there have been times when I've had to say, here's what I said. So I sit my kid down, my adult child, and I say, I have something to tell you. You can take this advice or you could not take this advice. Either way, I will respect you and I will follow your wish in this.

00:57:27.680 but here's what I'm seeing and here's why I'm seeing that this is a bad fit and so far I'm

00:57:34.300 batting a thousand to take my advice and you know are pleased in the long run but my big thing is

00:57:42.220 if if this is not the way you see it and you continue with this relationship I will 1000%

00:57:50.700 get on board and follow your lead and I will love this person and be the best

00:57:55.700 mother-in-law or whatever, you know, in the world, but here where I see concerns. And that's where

00:58:03.520 I feel like the parent should have had a private conversation, not with all of his friends,

00:58:09.580 but with him. Correct. Yeah. Cause you got to let him be a man. Like you can, you can give him

00:58:14.880 your two cents and say, you know, but it's just, it's when they want to control the situation so

00:58:21.180 bad. And there's some things that are out of your control. Some of your kids, if you have a lot or

00:58:24.980 few. But odds are you're not going to like one of their partners or their husbands or wives. Like

00:58:30.100 it's just a numbers game. Well, and it's so classic. If, if parents just don't like your,

00:58:36.260 your person, what do you do? You pull closer to them. You know, if you're just like, oh, that,

00:58:41.820 that girl's just a hussy or whatever the case may be, whatever your opinion is of, 1.00

00:58:46.420 of this other girl. If you don't like them, you're just going to make him fight for her

00:58:54.100 more yeah so better to just have a conversation and say I respect your decision you're the one

00:59:00.860 in this relationship yeah we're off the table um in spite of that we really worked hard to

00:59:08.140 figure out what is our new family going to look like going forward like we're going to get married

00:59:12.740 so when you hear that they're conspiring with your friends what'd you do you have a conversation

00:59:17.980 about it yeah yeah we have a conversation about it um i very much grew up in a house where again

00:59:24.140 because of that performative aspect it was also there was a compliance aspect yeah and so frankly

00:59:28.940 something i've had to really work on and grow in is is being comfortable in that conflict and at

00:59:33.340 the time i wasn't really i could bring that up i'm unhappy with this but am i going to really pursue

00:59:37.420 that the answer is no and that's the thing you know if you're not pleasant to be around people

00:59:45.180 aren't really going to tell you they're just going to walk away yeah stop talking to you

00:59:49.020 so if you're not being pleasant towards your son then he's not going to fight you on it he'll just

00:59:54.220 leave yeah exactly yeah and so you know we got married they were invited to our wedding they

01:00:01.180 weren't part of that and for a time we were able to have this kind of tacit wasn't there something

01:00:05.820 with the bridal shower or there's something that she tried to mess up the breath yeah yeah your 1.00

01:00:09.500 mother-in-law did try to mess up the bridal shower yeah yeah and we were we were trying to kind of

01:00:16.460 construct it i like how she looks at him like she looks at him like she's in love yeah i don't think

01:00:21.500 that she's the problem here yeah it's a sign yeah that's a sign for sure yes yeah and and where the

01:00:30.700 tables really turned was when we found out that brie was pregnant with our first daughter and and

01:00:35.260 so we we were nervous we called up my parents we said this is what's going on and we were profoundly

01:00:41.740 hurt by what we were met with which was disappointment and they were disappointed that

01:00:46.780 she was pregnant that's right okay yeah they they the way that we perceived it is that they were

01:00:51.980 expressing that this wasn't the pace that they expected us to move at and we had already gotten

01:00:55.420 married before they had wanted and now we were having children before you know was their timeline

01:01:00.300 so many mothers impose their will on the kids and at some point like you didn't have kids 1.00

01:01:06.380 to be to do what you wanted like you're supposed to raise them to be their own person and make

01:01:11.100 their own choices you know it's not to be a spitting image of what you like you see that a

01:01:15.740 lot with um boys that become like doctors and lawyers and they like feel like they had to do

01:01:20.300 it because of their family yeah they end up resenting you later if they have to live life

01:01:24.700 on your terms and not theirs absolutely yeah yeah and we i left that call i said let's let's regroup

01:01:34.780 let's have another conversation and when we did have that conversation and i expressed how i felt

01:01:39.500 and how hurtful that was rather than being met with the empathy and some repair that we would

01:01:45.180 have really hoped for i was met with um what they described as they were embarrassed by us

01:01:51.260 and that was actually the last conversation that i had with my parents before going no contact

01:01:56.060 four years ago and i just remember walking out of that conversation thinking for the years that

01:02:01.820 brie and i have been together i've had to watch her endure that treatment of not feeling accepted

01:02:07.740 and the last thing that i would want to do is bring a daughter into the world where she will 1.00

01:02:11.660 oh they're leaning into each other that's cute into the world on day one and experience that

01:02:16.780 treatment from her grandparents okay and so you just decided no contact so i'm curious chris

01:02:21.980 so can i ask how old you are i'm 30. okay you're 30. so you grew up in a world where you said you

01:02:28.620 you there was compliance and there was the household was performative so you didn't

01:02:34.300 grow up in a world where you thought about you know removing yourself or distancing yourself

01:02:39.020 from your parents where did the idea even come from that all right i'm not gonna i'm gonna cut

01:02:43.660 you off i'm not going to talk to you anymore yeah i don't think there was one moment i think it was

01:02:47.980 very incremental and i think this is a bigger trend because more parents outsourced raising

01:02:52.860 their kids so there's a lot of parents that like maybe on paper looked involved but weren't actually

01:02:58.300 involved yeah well and i would be willing to bet i don't know if these two met at princeton

01:03:04.380 um or just kind of that's where he went to school and then they met a little bit later

01:03:09.340 i would be willing to bet that this girl does not come from the family the kind of family that the

01:03:15.420 parents wanted for their you know this his family i think is my take is that his family uh imagines

01:03:24.700 themselves to be the joneses to be the rockefellers to be the ones that everyone

01:03:30.700 looks to you know and sets an example for others and just the fact that he keeps describing them

01:03:38.860 is very performative just tells me that it's all about the way it looks and not not anything

01:03:45.900 with any depth it's it's about the obedience factor yeah and i think that actually it all

01:03:52.940 began when when we first got together it really highlighted the emotional distance between myself

01:03:58.540 and my parents and i think with each step over years and years where i saw my parents being

01:04:04.300 less and less a part of my life the idea that they could not be a part of my life at all became

01:04:10.700 something that seemed possible so did you reach a point where you felt if i don't comply then they

01:04:15.020 they don't love me unless i'm complying that's right yeah i would say i'm not accepted unless

01:04:19.660 i'm complying not not accepted okay do you have a question for one of our experts here yeah as you

01:04:24.620 think about parents raising children and you know as us as parents we're not connected with our

01:04:30.460 families what would be your advice for talking about that with our children right how how as

01:04:36.300 parents can we best support um our children as they grow up you know you mean with their grandparents

01:04:41.740 without grandparents without grandparents yeah because are you speaking to your parent you're

01:04:45.260 not speaking to your parents either no why aren't you speaking to your parents i grew up in a very

01:04:50.060 religious household and when i became an adult and was not necessarily having some of the same

01:04:55.900 morals and values and political beliefs and religion that was a plot twist i didn't see coming

01:05:02.620 uh oh i thought that they were going to say yes we're very close to her family they're amazing

01:05:09.340 people oh this kind of uh but i still think the parents are out of bounds if he wants to marry

01:05:17.420 a libtard it's fine you gotta yeah they're hotter usually 1.00

01:05:21.900 um they basically disowned me okay oh they disowned oh my that's tough to

01:05:30.060 because i have seen religious fanatics where it's like the parents are overly controlling

01:05:37.860 um but i've also seen really um crash out daughters from religious households so i don't 0.95

01:05:43.920 yeah i'd have to hear their side too they disowned you yeah okay all right so your

01:05:49.620 children are grandparentless right now and so you're asking the question of how do you manage

01:05:54.980 the grandparentlessness right and because my generation's having kids older and older that's

01:06:01.220 going to be more of a reality like a lot of people aren't going to have grandparents because they'll

01:06:04.640 be dead yeah yeah yeah is it a tragedy i don't think this is going to be that abnormal people

01:06:12.600 just don't like i mean i didn't even i'd say past middle school i didn't really grow up with like

01:06:18.720 a community like because i i went to catholic school so everything was 30 minutes so everyone

01:06:23.460 was far like no one was close right i don't really see like like communities in the sense

01:06:30.340 where people are like close where you live you know yeah most people don't live by their parents

01:06:35.380 anymore yeah that's true that's true if as a grandchild their children are two and four

01:06:42.220 you never even knew your grandparents yes but they will still have some idea of what a grandparent

01:06:48.220 is. And I think for you two, it'll be very important in an age appropriate way to explain

01:06:54.680 the situation. We have chosen. How would you tell them? Like, what would you do? I, I would say

01:07:02.640 the best thing that you can do is have, bring other kind of mentor kind of relationships,

01:07:12.660 nurturing grandparent-esque relationships end the mix very carefully but like they need that

01:07:20.920 next generation of of love and guidance from somewhere that you trust um you know if possible

01:07:28.580 and I think I'd say the other thing is to make sure that you are being the best hands-on parents

01:07:36.800 that you can be and be nurturing so that, that, that generational thing is not a curse.

01:07:43.460 It's actually something that was kind of a blip on the radar. And now, you know, I don't think

01:07:49.480 that everything has to be like taking a stand on it. It can just be what it is. Like they aren't

01:07:55.880 great. They aren't fabulous grandparents. So we don't go visit them, you know? Yeah. I have a

01:08:03.680 friend it's kind of crazy how all this is getting aired out online yeah i have a friend he says that

01:08:09.240 he would take a woman cheating over a woman that airs out their business on the internet

01:08:13.760 he's like i would take infidelity you could cheat a few times a year i i completely respect that

01:08:21.120 yeah then to not have this contact as a protection for our family right and as they get older you

01:08:28.180 express that more i don't think they need to know like all of the painful stories that's not

01:08:33.940 appropriate um but being clear that this is a choice that you may and trying to find other

01:08:40.960 people in the world who can be grandparent like right so that could be a neighbor if you're a

01:08:46.980 part of a social community that could be someone in that social community but being open out i also

01:08:52.560 think ghosting is just so common like you ghost your best friend you go like it's just too easy

01:08:59.120 now yeah like in my generation i feel like in a few generations ago people would work it out but

01:09:04.800 now it's like you just move to a new city you like people ghost i mean people are i knew a girl in

01:09:10.160 school she was in like a four-year relationship and he just ghosted wow she would always joke

01:09:15.840 about it she'd be like because there's a few years later and she's like i don't know are we still

01:09:19.600 together we never had the talk so i guess we are i mean just he went to a different school and he

01:09:28.520 just ghosted wow yeah like that's not i know best friends that have ghosted they used to hang out

01:09:35.500 every day ghost now people are ghosting their parents like that is nuts yeah honest is really

01:09:42.280 important not trying to erase your childhood so you know not doing the thing of never talking

01:09:48.300 about your childhood, never talking about your parent, share some of those good memories with

01:09:53.200 them as well. So, you know, don't make it seem like these are people we don't talk about because

01:09:59.240 they will have some curiosity. And if you want to have that emotionally connected relationship with

01:10:05.640 them, the one that you didn't have, you'll have to be vulnerable and honest with them about that

01:10:10.240 situation. So you shouldn't act like these are people we don't talk about even though you're

01:10:12.820 not talking about them well they should be clear that these are people that you have chosen to not

01:10:19.020 have a relationship with we don't want to make it seem like they just disappeared no one ever

01:10:23.660 existed because you were raised by someone okay yeah what do you say dr gibson yeah i was just i

01:10:28.720 was just thinking about when you're trying to remember asking these old broads what to do 1.00

01:10:34.440 you gotta get some men in there seriously let's get some masculine guidance come on 1.00

01:10:41.440 yeah children begin to be curious about yeah i don't know um i i do think over a certain age

01:10:49.260 if they want i don't know if they'll even be alive with you know but oh wait hold on over

01:10:54.380 a certain age you gotta let them if they want to have that relationship but you know i think that

01:11:00.580 this is similar to situations where like there's been an adoption or something where there may be

01:11:07.460 a genuine curiosity, you know, later on. So, you know, demonizing these people or pretending they

01:11:18.840 just don't exist at all almost creates more intrigue around what really happened instead

01:11:26.360 of just kind of going kind of like in a breakup we we just didn't work out we just didn't see eye

01:11:33.160 to eye you know i i wish them well i just don't want to put myself in a position uh to be around

01:11:39.640 them but also similarly i would say deaths you know when there is a death in the family

01:11:48.600 you still need to remember that person whether whether everybody wants to talk about them all

01:11:55.560 the time or not you still can't just pretend they never existed i don't think that that's the healthy

01:12:00.380 way to go for like these parents raising girls or grazing raising children just to pretend like 0.94

01:12:08.360 they fell out of the sky like that's yeah but as a teenage girl you're also so self-centered i don't

01:12:13.340 think they'll miss much i don't know like because i grew up with um i like i spent time with my

01:12:21.580 grandma but it was just a few times a year and i don't really care you don't even like i i never

01:12:27.220 it sounds like your grandparents probably put so much work in that they were probably exhausted

01:12:32.560 they were like all these kids oh yeah yeah because my parents had 10 and my parents my my mom's mom

01:12:40.180 um had nine and my dad's dad or my dad's mom at 13. oh wow i know i know so yeah they were just

01:12:48.680 we're done that is awesome holy moly you've got so many cousins you don't even know their names

01:12:54.340 i don't i swear i don't i see some of them and i'm like you

01:12:58.860 i'll go to like funerals or family reunions and i'm like i bet someone new every time

01:13:06.920 there you go that is funny well thanks so much for coming on bunny you're

01:13:11.900 thank you for having to have you back so um you know we do these a few times a week so i'm sure

01:13:17.580 i'll send it for i love it do it i'm ready where can the people find you i see you're on twitter

01:13:23.820 you're an x now i'm on x i'm on x so it's the x as in the letter as in x matriarch uh and then on

01:13:34.060 youtube i'm made and i'm attraction matriarch so cool do you have some men and women or like what 0.99

01:13:40.780 what do you do? You know, I, I think that's why when, as I came back, I went with more of a,

01:13:47.440 a middle of the road kind of frame because I do get a lot of female questions and things like 1.00

01:13:54.860 that who are, uh, and, and really my, one of my main passions is keeping otherwise good

01:14:01.300 relationships together and strong. And so, yeah, I totally, I totally love to talk to men and women,

01:14:08.340 even though clearly my demographic has always been strongly male but i like i like keeping

01:14:15.780 the attraction hot for uh an entire relationship and making it making it awesome cool well thanks

01:14:24.100 for coming um guys if you want to go follow her on x um she's got some good stuff you can tell

01:14:29.300 when the people on x um get their information from the real world and that's what i really

01:14:33.780 like about her in fort worth playboy so you guys are great so thank you um thanks for coming on

01:14:38.900 guys um and let me know what topical reactions you guys want me to do next week and put it in

01:14:44.100 the comments like the video and we'll see you next time bye

Pearl - December 12, 2025

HE'S CRYIN WHILE SHE'S CHEATIN LOL

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