Pearl - He Says You're Not A Good Husband If You're Telling Your Wife What To Do!

00:00:00.000 Correct.

00:00:00.340 So my question is, can you be obedient if you're telling your husband what to do?

00:00:04.660 I would say no, but I would say you probably wouldn't be being a very good husband if you're just telling your wife what to do. 0.87

00:00:10.020 So the question we have today is, should Christian women, or in this case, Catholic women, obey their husbands? 0.83

00:00:16.880 Yes, no, and then explain what your reasoning is. 0.66

00:00:19.720 Okay, I would say yes.

00:00:23.180 I guess to start with the basis, are you Christian?

00:00:27.460 just so we know the base or are you just trying to get my answer i'm catholic no i'm catholic

00:00:34.100 okay awesome awesome uh would you what's your answer well i don't like to input my opinion

00:00:39.880 too much because i'm really trying to understand what people believe at the different churches so

00:00:44.340 if i input my opinion too much then it's not like um i like it to be an unbiased interview

00:00:50.180 does that make sense it does it does and just for reference so this is not our home parish

00:00:53.980 We're just visiting here. We're from Houston. We go to our lazy of Walsingham there in Houston.

00:00:59.300 I would say yes, because God asked them to obey us. You know, he said, you know, wives,

00:01:06.540 obey your husbands. Husbands, love your wives like Christ loved the church.

00:01:12.880 That doesn't make us any less equal. If anything, that just puts way more responsibility on the

00:01:17.860 husbands to be able to, we're responsible for those decisions. Plus, I think it's normal for

00:01:25.740 any relationship for there has to be when there is a disagreement, somebody has to make the final

00:01:30.920 word. It has to be somebody. And I would say because Jesus Christ did say, hey, the husbands

00:01:37.900 are going to lead, the wives are going to obey their husbands, and the husbands are going to

00:01:43.520 love their wives, like Christ loved the church. And then he kind of set that hierarchy. And so

00:01:47.760 we're just following his lead. Do you think it's okay for women to tell their husbands what to do? 1.00

00:01:55.780 Do I think it's okay for women to tell their husbands what to do? Can you give me an example? 0.99

00:02:03.660 Telling him to do chores, telling him like what to do around the house,

00:02:08.240 like where the kids are going to go to school, you know, just like there's a lot of decisions

00:02:13.180 in a long-term marriage that have to be made.

00:02:15.580 Correct.

00:02:15.900 So my question is, can you be obedient

00:02:18.420 if you're telling your husband what to do?

00:02:21.420 I would say no, but I would say

00:02:23.220 you probably wouldn't be being a very good husband

00:02:25.080 if you're just telling your wife what to do.

00:02:27.180 Okay.

00:02:27.560 I would say it should always start with a discussion.

00:02:29.340 You both go through the issue, whatever it is,

00:02:31.720 what school your children should go to.

00:02:33.900 You both say what you think pros and cons are.

00:02:36.940 At the end, hopefully you come to a mutual agreement.

00:02:39.840 Yeah, but it doesn't always work.

00:02:40.840 It doesn't always work.

00:02:41.620 And if just like in everything else, like at your job, your boss gets the final say.

00:02:46.540 And God said the husband's the boss, and so we follow what he says. 0.99

00:02:51.060 Yeah, so that's actually my next question is why is it that women would never tell their boss what to do, 1.00

00:02:58.280 but they'll tell their husbands what to do? 0.73

00:03:01.200 Like why do the bosses, I'm not saying at this church, but just in general,

00:03:04.340 why do they get more obedience than the husbands?

00:03:06.220 oof well i i hopefully it's because they feel safer in their marriage to push back

00:03:14.860 because i would say the exact same thing about husbands like why do we treat strangers better

00:03:19.840 than we do our wives there's no way husbands don't treat strangers better are you married

00:03:26.600 no no i i will say there are my parents have been married 30 years yeah yeah i i mean i hope

00:03:33.300 overall, I treat my wife better, but there are times where I will give her more grief

00:03:37.580 than I would a stranger. I would give a stranger, maybe you're not responsible for a stranger,

00:03:42.860 right? True. Yeah. So it's like, you know, if you're the one in charge of her, right?

00:03:49.020 Yeah. And I hope I'm doing a great job taking care of her, but yeah, I think because in that

00:03:53.740 relationship, you feel you're able to let your feelings come out more. And so you,

00:03:58.520 you may say things or do things that maybe isn't as nice as you would have to a stranger

00:04:06.280 because you you do feel more open to let that feeling out why are men so afraid to tell their

00:04:12.200 husband or why are men so afraid to tell their wives to obey them because i honestly i've done

00:04:18.580 a lot of street signs over the years i've had feminist is a hate group face like like i've had

00:04:24.300 most controversial abortion i have never had more hostility than bringing the word obey to church

00:04:29.820 really i've never and it kind of makes me sad i think we it kind of makes me so like it kind of

00:04:35.100 makes me it kind of black filled me they called the cops or they're like yeah yeah and it's like

00:04:40.060 no i don't care it's that's part of the i'm allowed to be here so it's like but

00:04:43.900 i just kind of it black pills me a little bit because i'm like why is obey um you know why is

00:04:49.900 is it a controversial word?

00:04:51.540 The kids have to obey the parents, right?

00:04:53.620 Exactly.

00:04:53.980 And at the church, we all have to obey God.

00:04:56.280 Yeah.

00:04:56.680 That is his calling for us.

00:04:58.080 We obey him.

00:04:59.580 Yeah.

00:04:59.900 And in this particular case, he says, hey, husbands, lead your family.

00:05:03.160 Yeah.

00:05:04.920 I'm sure he has good reasons for that.

00:05:07.060 Yeah.

00:05:07.220 I'm sure we can think of secular reasons why, you know, 0.95

00:05:11.220 the husbands may be better leaders than the wives.

00:05:13.700 And I'm sure we can come up with, you know, theological reasons why he may have made it that way.

00:05:18.260 but he specifically did and so do you believe in the natural order of the world like god

00:05:24.420 men women children uh definitely god humans uh the order between men women children i think that's

00:05:36.560 more of a responsibility thing and not whereas like we are definitely not equal with god but

00:05:42.020 Men, women, children are all equal in their humanity.

00:05:46.520 But do they have different roles to play?

00:05:48.820 Absolutely.

00:05:49.880 And does the world see those roles as one has power over the other?

00:05:55.160 Unfortunately, does that really mean that?

00:05:57.420 No.

00:05:58.080 Well, why is that a bad thing?

00:05:59.880 To have power over someone or to have this particular hierarchy?

00:06:03.500 Well, I don't have a boss, but if I used to, right?

00:06:06.140 Like, if he has power over me, I don't think that's a bad thing.

00:06:09.400 No.

00:06:09.900 Like, it's only a bad thing.

00:06:11.340 It is the order of things.

00:06:12.460 He's the boss.

00:06:13.520 That's his job.

00:06:14.500 Yeah. 0.83

00:06:14.800 So, like, why would that be a bad thing for the man to have power over the woman?

00:06:18.480 I don't think it is.

00:06:19.520 Yeah.

00:06:19.820 I don't think it's a bad thing.

00:06:20.600 I think the world has labeled that as bad.

00:06:23.160 And they see, I think the problem is the world is out searching for power and they think they want power.

00:06:29.540 But, and not to be cliche and go all, like, Spider-Man, but, like, that power comes with responsibility.

00:06:35.180 And I think most people, they want the power, but they don't really want the responsibility.

00:06:38.620 Yeah.

00:06:38.800 And so they really, then you probably don't get the power if you're not ready.

00:06:42.600 What's responsibility without authority?

00:06:47.440 That's good.

00:06:49.000 What is responsibility without authority?

00:06:52.460 Can I expand on that for me a little bit?

00:06:54.100 Like what is, if you have responsibility over something, but you don't have authority over it.

00:06:59.800 So if you have a bunch of employees and you're responsible for them,

00:07:03.320 or you have a family and you're responsible, but you don't have authority, what is that?

00:07:06.680 that feels pretty worthless like what's the point because I you see that in the workplace a lot

00:07:12.740 where like you have a boss who gives you things to do but they really have very little authority

00:07:18.060 over yeah making you do that or there being consequences if you don't it's yeah I would say

00:07:24.820 that's that's very it's very difficult to then manage that responsibility if you don't have any

00:07:31.740 authority to actually would you say it's close to slavery because you have all the responsibility

00:07:38.620 of working but no authority on over what you can do uh i don't know if i would push those two

00:07:47.000 together because there i would be thinking about the it's more the slave owner that has the

00:07:52.440 responsibility but he has authority and he does also have authority yeah you know he's

00:07:57.960 just a thought potentially not mismanaging that well yeah yeah um do you think that the catholic

00:08:07.200 church teaches this like do you think that they are good about telling the women to obey you would

00:08:13.340 say i would say yes okay that is granted that is the person who's only been a catholic for a year

00:08:17.940 so far i've been practicing for five years but only officially one year okay it's a baptist before

00:08:22.660 that okay well that's all my questions you're great it takes a lot of courage to say these

00:08:27.060 thing so i appreciate you coming up what was your name pearl davis um it'll be on youtube if you

00:08:32.380 just google pearl davis so tell them i'm nice tell them not i don't know why i mean i'd love

00:08:38.880 to argue with people anyway so this is super easy for me yeah yeah and i don't know if they what is

00:08:44.340 your stance i would say yeah i would say i think that's what's people scared like they don't

00:08:48.360 realize they actually probably totally agree with you or do you get a lot of people i get church i

00:08:53.040 think church is like the most like I would say if you believe in the the church worldview it's yes

00:09:01.220 but some people don't believe in it then you're doing a partnership right but if you believe in

00:09:06.060 like I don't think marriage is marriage if a man doesn't have authority then you're in a partnership

00:09:09.800 I don't you know what I mean like then that's something else I'm not saying it's wrong to do 1.00

00:09:13.880 that right that's your choice but like you know I just I think it's like women want the the status 1.00

00:09:21.620 of marriage without the hard part because obeying is actually I really hate it when women get 0.96

00:09:26.960 married and they say it's like um because I'm not married but I've been in a relationship where I do 0.83

00:09:32.260 have to listen to it's really hard like when you think you're right like and just like biting your

00:09:37.440 tongue and like just doing what he wants to do anyway you know humble yeah it's not easy and I'm

00:09:43.320 like if you were raised as a woman in America there's no way you know how to like do this off

00:09:47.800 the bat and you're going to have to learn like it's like do you know what i'm saying like and i 0.60

00:09:51.980 just don't think it's helpful even to women to not say that like you're supposed to obey like you do

00:09:57.200 your boss you know so and i think if you say not trying to say husbands are god yeah but if you

00:10:02.700 think about that same relationship like you i think about the freedom that you get yeah through god

00:10:10.340 i know he he's going to take care of it he's got the responsibility and the authority to handle

00:10:15.320 of this and i'm free because i've given him my life if you just roll that down one level to think

00:10:21.000 of how free the wife can be if she just gives that responsibility to her husband yeah well and you

00:10:25.960 look we spend too much money we eat too much sugar like naturally like we have like terrible habits

00:10:31.880 and you don't realize as a woman how bad your habits are until you start like seriously dating

00:10:36.520 a man and you just like notice i'm like oh i buy amazon over nothing you know like like do

00:10:43.320 The number of Amazon boxes I break down every day. 1.00

00:10:46.360 Yeah, and so many guys are enslaved to their wife's spending habits 0.98

00:10:49.720 because he can't legally tell her no. 1.00

00:10:53.120 Luckily, my wife does a great job. 1.00

00:10:54.520 She's great at this.

00:10:56.600 Yeah, but I'm saying like I think it's sad that it's not taught in churches.

00:11:01.960 Like a lot of – I can't say which ones do and which don't, right?

00:11:05.380 So I just go to the churches and I see what they say.

00:11:08.740 Yeah, unfortunately, we're not good at holding our people accountable.

00:11:11.160 we teach this but

00:11:13.380 we're not going to get in your face

00:11:15.060 sometimes you're going to get in people's faces

00:11:16.480 I don't know the best way to go about it

00:11:18.680 I just ask questions but I try not to

00:11:20.860 I don't want to influence people's answers

00:11:22.960 so I try to just let them talk

00:11:25.240 first before I give mine

00:11:26.600 thank you so much

00:11:28.900 I really appreciate it

00:11:30.060 thank you

Pearl - May 31, 2026

He Says You're Not A Good Husband If You're Telling Your Wife What To Do!

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