Pearl - I'M BACK! What I LEARNED From Interviewing Over 1000 WOMEN ｜ Pearl Daily

00:00:00.000 Thank you.

00:00:30.000 Thank you.

00:01:00.000 what up guys welcome to the just pearly things youtube channel and welcome to another episode

00:01:17.920 of pearl daily but today from the united states of america we're back home to chicago

00:01:25.280 okay guys thank you so much for supporting me um as and being so patient with us as we got

00:01:34.260 the chicago studio up and running i am going to need you guys's help in the comments if there's

00:01:39.400 any audio um tech things that you'd like to see something you'd like to see from the background

00:01:45.140 let me know you guys know i love working with you guys to get the best set and studio possible

00:01:51.040 um so welcome home thank you guys thank you alexia thank you john if you guys want to support my work

00:02:02.020 and really keep the lights on here you know we are demonetized so make sure you go to the audacity

00:02:08.220 network.com today we're testing the internet so hopefully next week we'll be live streaming on

00:02:14.780 the website that on the website you can super chat and you also get first priority for you know me

00:02:22.520 interacting with the chat comments etc etc okay someone says the bookshelf behind you is whack as

00:02:30.740 hell why what's wrong with john give me solutions dang it okay so all right so today what i wanted

00:02:43.160 to talk about is the past three years of my life and how I started this channel. I think this is a

00:02:51.340 common question I get on YouTube because I went from selling copiers in Milwaukee to getting a

00:02:58.120 billion views on my channel overnight. You know, even to this day, sometimes I go out and, you

00:03:03.940 know, people will still recognize me from the Andrew Tate interview or, you know, whatever show

00:03:08.920 I did. And I guess to a lot of people, it kind of seems like I came out of nowhere and they want to

00:03:15.840 know where did you get these opinions? Where did they come from? So the story starts in Milwaukee

00:03:24.700 and I was selling copiers and I had a TikTok account and on my TikTok account, as you know,

00:03:33.400 a lot of young women do it was just kind of random posting right it wasn't anything

00:03:38.920 about the red pill it was just random stuff and um i ended up starting a reaction channel from um

00:03:50.360 from the tick tock stuff so i ended up reacting to music um just random videos i saw on the

00:03:57.880 internet it was just something kind of fun for me right and then one day somebody said

00:04:05.320 you should check out kevin samuels and that was my introduction into the red pill and to the

00:04:13.240 manosphere so when i first saw kevin samuels i did not like him i had never seen that type

00:04:23.640 of content before and so hearing about dating from the men's point of view um was very jarring

00:04:29.960 to me i never really you know as a woman you kind of think about things from your point of view

00:04:36.680 but the first video i saw from kevin samuels was one of i would say his most out there and

00:04:44.360 triggering streams and this stream said that high value men cheat now from my perspective i

00:04:54.200 i i don't want to say i'd never seen cheating i had seen it you know where i'm from

00:04:58.840 but it i wouldn't say it was the norm and being and knowing men that are quote unquote high value

00:05:07.160 or you know he listed at the time the things that made a guy high value and it was a certain income

00:05:12.920 a certain like x y and z and i remember thinking okay this isn't what i've seen

00:05:18.680 and i'm gonna get to how that worldview changed a little bit but i want to continue with the story

00:05:27.500 first so what did i do what did i do next i obviously got kind of addicted to watching

00:05:34.580 red pill content i watched alpha male strategies i watched john anthony lifestyle i watched coach

00:05:42.060 Greg Adams. I watched more content than I really, every day I would just wake up because at this

00:05:49.980 time I'd quit my sales job to go pursue a volleyball career in England. But I had a year

00:05:56.260 where my season was canceled. So it was postponed for a year. So in that year, you know, I learned

00:06:04.360 a lot of the perspective of men's talking points or, you know, red pill talking points, right?

00:06:11.640 like I had learned a lot about that perspective um and by the way there's a lot of disagreement

00:06:21.160 amongst the red pill community about who's real red pill who's not and I could go into that but

00:06:27.000 that's a whole different show um but anyway so I watched I loved Rolo Tomasi I loved um alpha male

00:06:34.500 strategy stuff and this so in that year i just did reaction videos until i ended up going to a

00:06:44.420 pua boot camp is the best way i know how to describe it so this is a weekend where men pay

00:06:50.580 a couple thousand dollars to go to a major city and learn social skills of approaching talking to

00:06:57.380 and seducing women and i just thought it was really really interesting i wasn't really offended

00:07:03.780 it was just sort of like an underworld that i didn't really know anything about so i end up um

00:07:11.140 so again at this point i had a little youtube channel very small maybe 10 000 15 000 subscribers

00:07:18.340 and i end up connecting with a pua coach or whatever and he ends up inviting me to his boot

00:07:24.100 camp. And I've logged the whole thing. I had a grand old time. Um, and that was one of the first

00:07:34.260 times where I saw just how picky women are. Now, obviously you would think Pearl, didn't you know 1.00

00:07:42.460 that you're a woman? Didn't you think you were picky? Well, from the woman's point of view, 1.00

00:07:47.680 guys, no one, we're not paying attention to things from the men's point of view. 1.00

00:07:51.140 so what did i do i go to this boot camp and i see women that are objectively overweight

00:07:59.660 objectively objectively severely overweight rejecting men that were average

00:08:06.120 and um oh mic closer okay

00:08:12.180 and um so is it better now good okay um so women severely overweight rejecting men that were

00:08:24.800 average and i got to see firsthand how many approaches men had to do in order to find a

00:08:31.700 woman that was interested and you know i learned a bunch of different little tricks that they do

00:08:37.460 like one strategy that I've seen men do is you put multiple dates in one date so if you meet a

00:08:43.920 girl at a club you take her to different areas of the club so it feels longer um initiating touch

00:08:50.320 because a girl's not going to want to go home with you if you don't touch you know stuff like

00:08:54.080 that it's really just basic maybe social skills strategy um they would talk about logistics 1.00

00:08:59.560 living somewhere close um but i would have seen objectively overweight unattractive women

00:09:07.700 rejecting average men okay so i went to this boot camp but there was still things i watched 0.99

00:09:14.560 in the red pill that i don't know just kind of triggered me a little bit one was that marriage

00:09:19.120 was a bad deal for men another was that um another one was the high value men cheat and

00:09:28.940 And another one was, you know, the way they would, at the time, I thought the way they would use descriptors towards women, they would say, they would say things that I would view as generalizations at the time.

00:09:51.920 so what changed my worldview so I ended up going to England right and when I'm in England what

00:10:02.080 happened was um I'm still doing the my small YouTube channel on the side I'm pursuing a

00:10:08.960 professional volleyball career it's just a side thing for me and when I'm there I think that the

00:10:14.540 content is so interesting I I just I couldn't stop watching it um I'm watching Andrew Tate I'm

00:10:20.880 watching um you know the creators that i was listing before so what i did was after my season

00:10:28.400 was over i decided that i was going to invite women from my team or the gym that i went to

00:10:36.440 to come over after the show and give their thoughts on some of the concepts that i heard

00:10:41.940 now the first show i did was did women like bad boys and when i first heard this i really thought

00:10:48.240 that they didn't know what they were talking about um when i remember going on fresh and fit

00:10:56.820 a couple of years before and thinking no like we like the nice guy that's not true at all but i did

00:11:03.680 this show and i asked the women on my team and i couldn't even believe how openly they just admitted

00:11:08.840 yes we love the bad boys so that was one worldview that crashed another worldview that crashed and

00:11:17.800 Now, I want to give you guys context, the things I'm going to talk about next.

00:11:21.740 This is a year of doing shows, so interviewing 1,000 people.

00:11:25.800 These are some of the lessons that I learned in this process.

00:11:29.780 And what happened was I would recruit women for the show,

00:11:32.680 about eight people would show up, and I would do these panel shows.

00:11:36.460 And we would debate different topics, and I would get people's perspective on relationships.

00:11:40.900 Um, okay. So the one thing that I had heard is that women love a man that cheats or that can't 0.53

00:11:51.980 cheat. And I thought that was untrue. But when I interviewed a thousand women, I would get a

00:11:58.540 little bit more specific. If we had a show about cheating, I maybe would start it and say, have 1.00

00:12:03.640 you ever been cheated on? And I couldn't believe how many women said yes. It was pretty much every 1.00

00:12:09.220 single woman, maybe 70%, I would say, yes, I have been cheated on. And when you hear that on its

00:12:16.900 head, they tell you the story, whatever. But I decided to dig a little further. My second question

00:12:26.520 would always be, did you leave or did you stay when you found out? And I would say 80% of the

00:12:38.240 time women stayed. Second thing I figured out was if they ended up leaving the man, 0.54

00:12:47.220 they left him when he stopped cheating. So I had a clip that went viral where I said that women

00:12:53.220 love being cheated on because I had just done 10 shows where I couldn't even believe it. I would 1.00

00:13:02.700 say, have you been cheated on? Yes. Did you stay or did you leave? No, I stayed. How long did you

00:13:12.080 stay? Six months. Okay. And then did you end up breaking up with him? Yes. Okay. Well, did you,

00:13:19.580 was he cheating then? Well, no.

00:13:28.780 So, you know, what, what conclusion am I supposed to have? You know, the next lesson that I learned

00:13:35.800 interviewing a thousand women is that, and this is a little bit counterintuitive, but

00:13:41.760 it doesn't really matter. And this is just a people skill anyways. It's not,

00:13:49.580 just about women or men, but, you know, people say things and people lie to themselves to the

00:13:55.560 point where they believe it's true. You know, I would have women that came on the show that

00:14:00.520 were single mothers that truly believed they were traditional women. How can you be a traditional 0.88

00:14:05.700 woman and a single mother? Those don't really go hand in hand. You simply cannot. And the cognitive 0.75

00:14:13.800 of dissonance that I would see over and over again led me to believe, led me to conclude that

00:14:22.980 sometimes people virtue signal, but you have to watch what they do.

00:14:29.700 Another example that I thought of was that there was a woman that came on my show, the whole show.

00:14:36.420 She said, I like nice guys. I do. I'm done with the bad boys. I like nice guys.

00:14:42.440 well this show my recruiter had brought one of his friends to watch the show

00:14:47.600 and this guy I didn't know this at the time I didn't know who he was but sometimes the

00:14:53.820 recruiters would bring their friends to like watch a show at this point this guy was just

00:14:58.620 out of prison I don't know why he was at my apartment I'm like why would you bring him

00:15:03.800 or like he dealt drugs or something I don't know what he was doing

00:15:08.040 uh but anyway that besides the point he got her number and took her home that night

00:15:13.940 and this woman for an hour the whole show so what did i conclude was that sometimes people

00:15:23.680 lie obviously and sometimes people lie to themselves to the point that they believe that

00:15:29.240 it's true. Okay. Out of 1000 people, I found maybe three women that I would say came off as close to

00:15:43.180 traditional. So a lot of times what I would hear is that the conservative bunch or the conservatives

00:15:55.220 would always say go to church and find you a good woman but when i and when i interviewed women i

00:16:02.040 would get women that were muslim i would get women that were catholic i would get women that were 0.99

00:16:06.280 christian i would get i would get um all different types of women and um out of a thousand maybe

00:16:16.420 83 that, and guys, by the way, I don't, I'm not saying that I like, that I am traditional

00:16:25.000 or any of that, but I can observe what makes someone traditional, what makes someone not.

00:16:30.260 And typically women that are traditional prioritize their family over their career above all costs.

00:16:36.160 So you can't really say you're traditional if, you know, you spent your youth not having 0.94

00:16:41.600 a family, right? You can't really say you're traditional if you're working 80 hours a week

00:16:47.000 with kids, you know, there's just things that I look for in the way that women carry themselves 1.00

00:16:52.020 and choices that they made that I would deem them, you know, just from my perspective, 0.99

00:16:56.940 traditional or not traditional, I'd say maybe three out of a thousand. And a common pushback

00:17:03.100 I would always get was, oh, it's just the types of women you bring on your show. But 1.00

00:17:10.140 Being in London, it was so, I mean, we had normal women.

00:17:13.580 We had professional women. 0.77

00:17:14.800 We had women that were doctors that came on our show. 0.98

00:17:18.820 I mean, we even had women that were wives that came on our show.

00:17:24.380 And I would even try to recruit. 0.97

00:17:26.360 I would be, fine, find me these super, you know, trad wives. 1.00

00:17:30.100 I couldn't find them. 0.98

00:17:32.140 The next thing I learned is that very few women can process information without taking it personally. 0.99

00:17:37.800 an example of this is one time i tweeted that 25 women are 25 year old women are better looking 0.57

00:17:44.520 than 35 year old women and there were married mothers tweeting me their selfies trying to prove

00:17:52.580 to me some random woman on the internet that they are still hot i was never talking about anyone in

00:17:59.180 particular i never said a specific name i just said you know as we get older we're not as good

00:18:06.300 looking. The same way if a guy, I don't know, at 60 or 70, he probably won't be able to lift as

00:18:13.160 much. If you, if you say that to most guys, they probably won't tweet you their muscles, you know?

00:18:21.260 But so what I realized is I could never make a general statement about men and women dynamics

00:18:32.240 without people, and men have this problem too, right? It goes both ways, but without it being

00:18:39.760 taken personal. Many of the men that go on these shows and say they would never cheat either don't

00:18:53.600 have the option or um they're lying there was a point where there was um a guy that was like a

00:19:04.580 regular on our show and his whole thing was that he does not cheat he's a loyal person

00:19:09.540 and what i found is the more someone says that they're loyal the less likely they will be

00:19:15.260 just in life like people that are loyal don't really have to say

00:19:20.700 but it was it was really funny because he was dating like three women on the show

00:19:25.480 it's like you don't people don't think i get the gossip like but you know i'm never one to

00:19:31.260 like call someone out on a show if i know stuff i just let him go you know um i also found out

00:19:38.960 that most women have an ex that they go back to in between breakups um so you know beware guys 0.93

00:19:48.360 good luck um and the other thing is that oh the other one thing that i learned was that many women

00:20:01.880 or many times when people say they became something or change something it's more that

00:20:08.240 they're trying to convince themselves so i would always hear i became feminine i became feminine

00:20:13.680 And I don't know, their demeanor wasn't, I couldn't really put my finger on what it was, but I found the women that were femininity coaches had a tendency to be really not feminine at all.

00:20:38.000 I would find they would be the most masculine ones. 0.83

00:20:41.000 Let me look at the chat.

00:20:43.680 So I'm trying to, I'm trying to stay within the guidelines guys. So if I'm a little slow, just, you know, someone said, yeah, and Doug is telling me in the chat, Pearl had to take a break and guys, this was so taxing on me.

00:21:03.620 So again, at one point between me and King Rich's show, we had six shows a week.

00:21:10.460 So I just, I got to a point I just could not, it was so frustrating to me to have conversations

00:21:19.120 over and over again where the information could never be taken in general.

00:21:23.400 It was always taken personal that I just needed a break.

00:21:27.680 I just needed a break.

00:21:30.520 They're not demure.

00:21:32.220 What is that?

00:21:33.080 that's a new, is that a new thing? Okay. I know I keep hearing this word, demure.

00:21:43.460 Um, another, another conclusion I had was men don't notice if a girl's chubby, if she has big

00:21:50.800 boobs, there would be women that I would say, like, I would notice they were kind of overweight.

00:21:58.320 and i just noticed that men don't even see it if they have big boobs okay so another thing that 0.87

00:22:06.080 i concluded was that i used to think that women had real reasons for leaving their families

00:22:13.440 i would think it would be a very serious um you know i would think divorce is a serious thing

00:22:20.320 women don't do that for no reason and when i got into the space i would hear that over and over

00:22:25.600 again. And I would just think to myself, well, it can't be that simple. And to be fair, it's not

00:22:31.700 the only reason, right? Sometimes there are real reasons, but overwhelmingly interviewing a

00:22:39.360 thousand women, I found out that the common answers I would get for why are you divorced

00:22:46.900 would be, I outgrew him.

00:22:52.000 That was the number one answer that I got.

00:22:55.520 Or we outgrew each other.

00:22:57.540 And when I would dig and say, well, was he abusive?

00:23:00.420 Did he do this?

00:23:01.200 Did he do this?

00:23:01.840 There was nothing.

00:23:03.300 And what I came to realize is most people value

00:23:06.540 their own happiness above their children's.

00:23:12.340 Another thing I learned is that 1.00

00:23:16.900 the women, I think conservatives paint the past as a better time to be alive. 0.98

00:23:25.020 I would always hear that, and I maybe even said it at some point, that the past was better because 0.73

00:23:30.100 it was more traditional and families stayed together. But when I really got to thinking

00:23:36.080 about it, the women of the past did not like their husbands that much, because the second 0.69

00:23:41.860 they got the chance, they took the money and left. Again, I don't look at what people say,

00:23:46.260 look at what they do and as soon as women got jobs and got the option to divorce they did 0.55

00:23:52.020 and that begs the question would you want someone to be with you who doesn't want to be there 0.84

00:23:58.100 and that is why i changed my opinion on banning no-fault divorce on you know because i just

00:24:06.980 i think it's got to be torture to be in the same house as someone who doesn't want to be there

00:24:11.700 I don't know. And some of the wives are so miserable, guys. They just nag on their husbands 0.96

00:24:22.780 like endlessly. Why torture them? So I used to think that marriage and family was the answer, 1.00

00:24:34.760 right? When I first got into the space, again, some of you might not have even seen this content,

00:24:41.100 But before I really went super viral and started talking about divorce laws and all that stuff, I thought that marriage was the solution to a lot of people's problems, traditionalism.

00:24:54.960 But what I came to find out was that marriage in 2024 is overwhelmingly a negative experience for men.

00:25:04.180 Most men that have been married over a certain amount of time did not have happy marriages.

00:25:08.920 I found out that 80% of their wives gained 20 pounds or more in the first five years.

00:25:15.280 I found out the average length of marriage is eight years.

00:25:18.940 I found out that gray divorce is rising, and a lot of the stats on marriage not being dead

00:25:26.720 were a bit misleading because they include people that have not yet got divorced.

00:25:36.160 And I realized that a lot of people want to sell their religion. They want people to convert to

00:25:43.640 their religion, and so they mislead you on the reality of the situation. Now,

00:25:49.460 there is a silver lining, and I'm going to get to it. I had a tweet detailing, so

00:25:58.860 I interviewed a lot of men that were victims of divorce rape. And these are men that lost

00:26:06.420 everything in divorce. Wives left, took the kids, took their money, lost their job, like just

00:26:12.640 complete L, right? And I found out it was a common pattern that after the second child, 0.56

00:26:19.920 a lot of these women stopped sleeping with their husbands and get the divorce.

00:26:24.340 The timelines differ. I found this consistent amongst Muslim background, Catholic background, Christian, United States, California, Texas, Florida.

00:26:44.880 and I found out that the average marriage just is not

00:26:54.040 it's not a good experience for most men

00:26:59.580 because they don't get anything out of it

00:27:03.300 and this was really hard for me to reconcile

00:27:06.140 because most people I knew were married

00:27:08.520 but one it doesn't mean they'll stay married

00:27:12.760 and two it doesn't mean that's the average situation and what i figured out is marriage

00:27:18.980 seems to be going away for the middle class and be something for the upper class and that's it

00:27:23.720 so

00:27:26.280 um the other thing i i realized is most men live on their wife's terms not theirs

00:27:38.380 even christian women i found that they would almost be worse quality and i know i know the

00:27:46.100 catholics and christians hate me for this but gosh i i went i've been to like five christian

00:27:52.120 weddings and every time i i would ask the wives before they get married will you obey your husband

00:27:57.980 it's overwhelmingly no i'm like isn't that the one job isn't that the one thing

00:28:04.760 so you know but what i did conclude after this year is that i do think that the only marriage

00:28:17.560 that's left is the purest marriage that you could possibly have so in the past women stayed for

00:28:25.340 money in the past women stayed because of culture in the past women stayed because of religion 0.72

00:28:32.480 Now you're paid to leave. Now your failure rate is well above 50%. They lie to you about these

00:28:41.720 stats, guys. Your chance of success is roughly 10%. But the people that make it work, you know

00:28:53.300 they're there because they love each other. Because there's nothing in this society that's

00:28:58.060 keeping people together so that was my conclusion after a thousand a thousand women

00:29:06.740 interviewing a thousand women and just some lessons that I learned and I'd love to hear

00:29:14.900 from you guys about what you learned from their paid to divorce you never paid delete yeah yeah

00:29:21.240 guys this is what it is um happy wife happy life yeah and guys the people that the people that

00:29:30.920 don't want to get married oh i understand it i completely understand there's no good reason for

00:29:36.280 a guy to do that in 2024 not the odds are completely stacked against you the laws are

00:29:41.320 completely stacked against you the judicial like everything is completely stacked against you

00:29:46.680 you. If you do get married, I would hire a PI. I would get a prenup. I would do all of that. 0.91

00:29:56.600 But my conclusion is the couples that make it work and figure it out in this mess of an environment

00:30:03.860 have the most pure form of marriage that there's ever been.

00:30:11.300 Take it or leave it. You can disagree. That's fine. Let me know what you think in the comments.

00:30:16.680 and this is this has been great guys tomorrow um we're gonna be streaming at three o'clock as well

00:30:23.960 let me know any feedback from the show and things you want to talk about um and we're gonna have

00:30:32.120 guests on the show can you show them the chairs are they able to see it or no oh no there's no

00:30:37.640 oh no okay well we do have chairs here so we're gonna have people but thanks for watching guys

00:30:44.120 i love you thanks for the support and please go to the audacity network.com we're still demonetized

00:30:49.880 so you know every membership helps and any questions you have i will take on the audacity

00:30:57.480 network so love you guys and i'll talk to you next time

Pearl - September 04, 2024

I'M BACK! What I LEARNED From Interviewing Over 1000 WOMEN ｜ Pearl Daily

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