Pearl - May 10, 2026


Laura Southern Is Holier Than Thou

Topics
polyamory and honesty
Mentioned
Latina
＂I'm On A Diet＂ - COPE! AI is Creating a Beauty Class and a Servant Class

Episode Stats


Length

8 minutes

Words per minute

190.37

Word count

1,552

Sentence count

44

Harmful content

Misogyny

4

sentences flagged

Toxicity

12

sentences flagged

Hate speech

6

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Join us as we discuss polyamory, cheating on your wife, and being a hypocrite in the public eye. We also talk about why it s better to be honest about your failures than to pretend to be a good person.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Who's watching the child? Why are you doing drugs with Destiny instead of watching your kid?
00:00:05.140 You could just build your brand on like politics, not yeah, I'm an ape. Go you guys. That's a simp. 0.97
00:00:12.620 No offense, but it's just like, I'm not that high. I would say to that is the, I would, and I said
00:00:20.020 this earlier, I would rather be at least certainly after I had been in this sphere that I felt was so
00:00:25.700 dishonest with the public about who they were, including myself. It was very refreshing.
00:00:30.000 to be at a table with someone who is like, yes, I am polyamorous. Yes, I do drugs. Yes, I partake
00:00:39.420 in all of this, quote unquote, degenerate behavior, than to be at a table with a bunch
00:00:43.440 of people doing the exact same thing, but pretending publicly to be saints. Because at
00:00:49.500 least I can't deconstruct the world that I was a part of without honesty. So I couldn't deconstruct
00:00:56.220 it with the people because everyone was lying to themselves at least i have a lot more respect for
00:01:01.660 people who can sit there and say this is who i am even if the public hate it yeah this is what i'm
00:01:07.200 gay i'm a bisexual polyamorous guy that's it i'll get on all the time by the internet for it but
00:01:13.500 that's just who i am rather than people who are exactly the same conduct themselves the same way
00:01:18.080 but it's actually more dangerous to be friends with people in the right-wing media who have all
00:01:23.820 these proclivities but don't tell them publicly because as soon as you find out about it you're
00:01:27.500 now a threat and they have to kind of destroy you and destroy your life whereas if people have their
00:01:32.320 cards on the table and they say this is who i am it's a lot safer to have a friendship with them
00:01:36.040 and you can just talk honestly about your failures and that's what i that's what i needed at that time
00:01:40.080 in my life i needed someone i could talk honestly about my failures and the struggles i was having
00:01:44.500 i didn't believe in the trad life or marriage anymore after my husband left you know um i see
00:01:49.480 all the rumors online Lauren cheated on her husband with destiny that didn't yeah okay why
00:01:53.600 did he leave again I'm just tired of this narrative that you know and the world does
00:01:59.240 not do us a service by telling us we're always the victims right I can think of a situation
00:02:04.400 where I did not get I did not get what I wanted out of a relationship right and when I was young
00:02:11.720 you know it's like oh he used you this blah blah blah blah blah but when you really like
00:02:18.360 go back and think about things you're just like oh no I did x y and z I look I'm not telling you
00:02:25.060 guys all my business but you guys you guys get the idea it's like you can't just look and say
00:02:29.620 you were some innocent victim in this and oh the only thing I did wrong was I picked wrong it's
00:02:35.360 like okay you were perfect in this what did you do that was wrong so happen um I didn't even meet
00:02:42.120 him until after my marriage had ended but I we sat and I remember being completely just how how
00:02:49.700 can I believe in the ideals of conservatism without inherently believing that my life is a failure
00:02:55.540 like I'm a single mother now how can I how can I not hate myself and still believe in the tried
00:03:00.440 life because no just say you're a loser that's it just say I'm a loser now don't cope don't try to 0.99
00:03:06.080 make us think you're not a loser don't pretend you're important you're just a loser it's all 1.00
00:03:10.860 I'm a loser too. 1.00
00:03:11.860 I'm a loser. 0.99
00:03:12.860 I failed at it. 0.83
00:03:14.180 And the idea that maybe I needed to deconstruct some of that was profoundly healing in some
00:03:19.440 ways for me.
00:03:20.540 But I definitely, like I certainly concluded that I couldn't be polyamorous, that that
00:03:26.720 was not the lifestyle that I could pursue.
00:03:28.980 But sitting there and doing drugs with destiny and talking about how my marriage had fallen
00:03:33.640 apart was profoundly more.
00:03:35.780 And you ever think about like who's watching this lady's kid?
00:03:39.060 Who's watching the child? 0.88
00:03:40.060 why are you doing drugs with destiny instead of watching your kid honest than sitting with a bunch
00:03:46.700 of people who are cheating on their wives and telling the internet you need to be trad and
00:03:50.480 christ is king that was a lot better of a place for me to be not a healthy place to be um i do
00:03:57.720 need structure but i feel more comfortable with people who can honestly talk about their failures
00:04:01.960 you know on this idea of people who are cheating on their wives and telling the internet you know
00:04:07.620 You need to be proud in Christ as king.
00:04:10.640 There are two interesting pieces of that, I think.
00:04:12.760 One of them is, I think that for the public man,
00:04:15.940 it's better to say virtuous things than to do virtuous things.
00:04:22.060 Whereas for the private man, it's better to do virtuous things
00:04:24.920 than to say virtuous things.
00:04:26.580 Neither is good.
00:04:27.860 I'm not suggesting that a public man living a hypocritical life
00:04:32.140 is itself virtuous.
00:04:33.880 It's certainly not.
00:04:34.620 But it seems obvious to me that if your husband says, I'll be faithful and then cheats, what
00:04:40.620 he says has no value.
00:04:42.340 If your pastor says, be faithful, but then cheats, well, men fail, men fall to temptation.
00:04:50.840 Why do we, I hate that.
00:04:51.980 This is why the conservatives, it's like men fall.
00:04:54.500 You didn't fall to temptation. 0.99
00:04:56.640 You raw dogged that hot young Latina that was eyeing you down while your white wife 1.00
00:05:03.800 was being a bitch. 1.00
00:05:04.620 or vice versa right your latino wife got fat and though you know the little blonde girl in church 1.00
00:05:09.300 was giving you googly eyes you didn't fall i mean like there's so many decisions you have to make 1.00
00:05:14.760 in order to have sex with someone it was a choice right you should drive over there you got to get 0.96
00:05:19.780 naked you got like you know you gotta you gotta thrust a bunch of times like there's so much 0.98
00:05:26.120 it's not just falling like you did not just fall it's just incredible but that's still better than
00:05:32.540 a pastor who says cheat like a pastor who says a perfectly christian thing to do is to cheat it
00:05:36.920 okay so there's courage in talking about your sins publicly there's some sins guys i've done
00:05:43.640 i don't really want to talk about publicly you know what i mean and because i'm not as courageous
00:05:47.620 but there's something about a guy who just doesn't give an f and um you know um like it does take a
00:05:54.780 level of courage for tate to be like yes i cheat on all the women i'm with yes you know what you're
00:06:00.400 saying. So there's a kind of, there's a kind of call to hypocrisy that I don't think is
00:06:06.260 necessarily wrong in public life. That said, there's a difference between, there's a difference
00:06:13.180 between failing in the face of temptation and embracing sin while preaching virtue. And that
00:06:24.540 is now something different. We're not talking about, I have a lot of grace for people who make
00:06:29.700 mistakes on account of all the mistakes that I make. You know, it's easy to pick on you for
00:06:33.760 hanging out with Milo. I hired Candace. So like, you know, nobody's batting a thousand here or 0.92
00:06:39.960 anything. But I think that the movement as a whole, conservatism as a whole, particularly
00:06:46.440 today, particularly since it moved online, is so graceless. I think that a fundamental flaw
00:06:54.140 in even the message of conservatism, not only how we actually behave, but almost the message
00:06:59.600 itself is that we uphold ideals and that's important especially because the left has been
00:07:06.040 tearing down ideals for our entire life like they've they've been trying to deconstruct the
00:07:10.300 ideals themselves and so we've gotten so used to upholding the ideals that we almost leave no room
00:07:15.760 for anyone who's fallen short of the ideals to actually participate anymore you know when we
00:07:20.940 say things like all you have to do to be successful in america's study after study demonstrates it
00:07:25.940 You know, graduate high school, get married before you have children, don't do drugs.
00:07:30.580 Like, you do these three things, you're going to make it in America.
00:07:34.580 And that's true.
00:07:35.640 And it's important to say that that's true because you're giving people actual important
00:07:38.920 tools with which to govern their lives.
00:07:41.140 The problem is most people fall short of one, two, or three of those at some point.
00:07:45.720 And now what?
00:07:47.120 And conservatism does a very bad job of saying now what?
00:07:50.140 I would say that it's a it is it is probably an indictment of the conservative movement that you spent so much time in it and knew it so intimately that when you like there's no you know there's no scolding her for the disloyalty of getting to know all these people and then spreading their secrets.