Pearl - June 27, 2026


Man Gives The Worst Answers To ＂Should a Mormon Woman Obey Her Husband？


Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

190.59

Word count

2,196

Sentence count

55

Harmful content

Misogyny

6

sentences flagged

Toxicity

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

2

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 It's not that Eve made a mistake and caused the fall of Adam. 0.89
00:00:04.580 A lot of Christian sexism is rooted in that.
00:00:09.900 But rather, we believe that what Eve did was actually a brave and necessary choice.
00:00:15.220 Hi, I'm Pearl. Nice to meet you.
00:00:17.560 So I go to different churches and ask what they believe about obedience.
00:00:20.740 No right or wrong answers, but I'd love to get your thoughts on what you guys believe here.
00:00:24.960 That if women should obey their husbands.
00:00:26.920 and no right or wrong answers tell us yes why or why not yeah uh no and i think um
00:00:32.680 the nature of the question is to admit like you know you'd expect a christian to be like oh yeah
00:00:39.560 but um or at least like today's christians a lot of them um at least the loud ones you hear but uh
00:00:46.700 no i i think in our church at least um this is our belief now i i'm speaking as a member so i
00:00:53.640 can't speak for everybody, but no, it's, it's an equal partnership. Um, a lot of what we believe
00:00:59.880 is that, um, a marriage is meant to make both of you better. Um, and it's not meant for one to be
00:01:06.100 domineering or, or, uh, wants it to be submissive to the other. I think it's, um, you know, it's,
00:01:13.940 it's an equal partnership. I mean, for my marriage, you know, I, it's not like whatever
00:01:18.920 I say goes or whatever my wife says goes I mean she's right a lot but um I think it's just you
00:01:25.860 work together and you you try your best to agree on things um and I think that's a lot of what our
00:01:33.160 church teaches um is is you know you guys are working together like it's not a it's not being
00:01:40.980 submissive and I the one thing our our church has struggled with is the the idea of the priesthood
00:01:46.380 And sometimes that has been used as a means to kind of force a kind of sexist, you know, misogynist view on things.
00:01:59.700 But I don't think that, like, if you really dig deep in our doctrine, that doesn't really have a lot of basis.
00:02:04.500 Who is responsible for protecting the family?
00:02:08.260 Protecting the family?
00:02:10.160 I don't know if that's necessarily, like, I don't know.
00:02:14.760 I'm trying to think of, like, our doctrine.
00:02:16.380 I mean traditionally I guess the man but I don't like it's up to both people like if my if there's
00:02:25.100 an intruder and I'm dead or something it's not like my wife's gonna be like hey my husband's
00:02:30.140 dead I can't protect the family because it's not my job you know like I don't I don't really believe
00:02:33.620 in that I think like now we have guns so they can both do it right yeah exactly yeah yeah exactly
00:02:39.520 so what about providing do you guys believe that it's the man's duty to provide or it should be
00:02:43.880 both of them um no i i it's i i don't believe that i i will like i'm pretty progressive um but
00:02:52.780 i you know ask 10 other people in our church you might get different answers but i think for most
00:02:57.740 people no like i i don't think it's necessarily like the man's duty to provide i think one at
00:03:03.280 least one needs to provide someone needs to pick up like the family's got to eat so someone's got
00:03:07.360 to do it i don't think it necessarily needs to be the man um don't you think in a relationship
00:03:11.440 though, one person's always obeying the other, uh, because, uh, generally speaking, um, you know,
00:03:17.440 there's a reason we have phrases like she wears the pants or he wears the pants because one person
00:03:22.520 does have to give in more than the other. Yeah. Would you agree with that or disagree? Um, I think
00:03:26.740 that tends to happen. Um, I think when you have two people, one tends to be more domineering than
00:03:31.640 the other. Um, I think that shouldn't be the case if it is, I think you both should work to a place
00:03:38.540 where you're both, um, being, uh, open and, and not, you know, I just, I don't really believe in
00:03:46.480 that dynamic. I don't think it should be strive for. It may happen, but I think you both should
00:03:50.460 be open. I've just never seen a couple that where one person doesn't, you know, have more authority.
00:03:55.680 You don't agree? No, I definitely, I'm saying in practice, yes, that happens all the time. Um,
00:04:00.080 and sometimes like it may be a necessity if, if, if mom is at working a lot or, or dad is at
00:04:06.560 working a lot um you know the the parent that is home may need to be more domineering just to
00:04:12.600 handle on the kids um and i think that definitely shakes out but i don't think it's an ideal like
00:04:18.380 i think both people should be open so in your relationship um is there one of you that makes
00:04:22.480 more decisions than the other would you say it's equal um i it i'm i'm probably idealizing our
00:04:28.760 relationship but yeah maybe like you could give me specifics like finances you make okay here's
00:04:34.620 how here's how me and my wife split it i handle finances um so i i work full-time she's a stay-at-home
00:04:39.320 mom i also work from home which helps i handle finances uh she handles a lot of like the meal 0.76
00:04:44.140 planning i still cook but like she does meal planning and a lot of just like trip planning
00:04:48.600 and stuff um i handle like housework yard work um car stuff like i'll do our oil changes and all
00:04:55.440 that um uh you know we both kind of equally parent she's obviously a stay-at-home mom so
00:05:00.860 time spent is more her um but i'm still very like present and active so um yeah we kind of split up
00:05:08.320 and if you told her no on something would she listen and vice versa like if um yeah um she
00:05:14.020 definitely would there's some things that i'm like she would she would listen but be like this
00:05:18.680 is kind of dumb but like it's okay reluctantly yeah reluctantly sure and i've done the same
00:05:23.220 um but yeah i'd say so how do you guys feel about female-led bible studies here are those okay 0.97
00:05:29.440 Yeah, we actually...
00:05:30.840 We go to different churches.
00:05:31.980 No, you're good.
00:05:32.920 No, we actually have, like, one of our classes that we do every week.
00:05:37.660 It's called Relief Society.
00:05:39.560 And it's women-led. 0.87
00:05:40.540 It's all women. 1.00
00:05:42.400 And women, actually, they just changed the rule that women can be the... 1.00
00:05:46.580 It's called the Sunday School President, 1.00
00:05:48.020 which basically means they can lead as...
00:05:51.720 There can be female leaders of, like, the teaching kind of callings in our church. 0.99
00:05:56.260 so like they can kind of organize how do we teach in our church how do we um uh like how do we 1.00
00:06:03.660 organize classes what do we like what kind of lessons do we do so stuff like that what would
00:06:07.320 you say are the biggest misconceptions about this church oh misconceptions um it's a really good one
00:06:13.140 i think uh we get labeled a cult a lot um and i think pretty much all religions if you widen
00:06:21.300 your scope enough can be called the cult um but like people are free to leave uh everything's
00:06:26.860 obligatory yeah there's some social pressures that have to do with it but it's like if i leave
00:06:31.420 tomorrow or today i'm not going to get like threatened and there's no and we don't really
00:06:35.640 like worship a person other than jesus like people think we worship joseph smith that's
00:06:40.200 another big misconception but we don't and we've definitely tried to steer away from that because
00:06:44.080 it's like he's a prophet but he's also a flawed person in our eyes um you know like he's not
00:06:49.620 perfect. None of our prophets are perfect. Um, so yeah. Do you guys believe in the natural order
00:06:54.920 of the world? God, men, women, children, or are you a more egalitarian? Egalitarian for sure. I
00:07:00.180 mean, God above everything else, right? I don't think we're on equal plane with God. Um, but no,
00:07:05.120 um, I think one of the, uh, people use like the Adam and Eve story, um, a lot. One of the things
00:07:11.040 in our church that we believe is that it's not, it's not that Eve, um, made a mistake
00:07:16.860 and cause the fall of Adam.
00:07:18.780 A lot of Christian sexism is rooted in that.
00:07:24.120 But rather, we believe that what Eve did
00:07:27.280 was actually a brave and necessary choice.
00:07:30.680 Sorry.
00:07:31.680 To listen to the serpent?
00:07:34.200 Yes, to make a decision to actually say,
00:07:38.440 hey, if we want to multiply and replenish,
00:07:41.320 or not multiply and replenish,
00:07:42.140 but no true happiness and wisdom,
00:07:44.120 we need to partake of the fruit of knowledge
00:07:48.220 and it's complicated because
00:07:50.980 again, I'm not speaking doctrine
00:07:53.340 but this is a lot of what some of our members believe
00:07:57.340 is that Eve made that decision
00:08:00.940 because it was necessary
00:08:03.540 and there's a difference between a sin and disobedience
00:08:06.980 God commanded it
00:08:09.380 but I think
00:08:10.160 it's just complicated
00:08:13.720 I think part of it was necessary.
00:08:15.760 I think it was intended because otherwise we couldn't have all of this, right?
00:08:18.780 It's a complicated, messy world, but...
00:08:20.920 Wasn't it better before?
00:08:23.280 Well, I mean, think about, like, have you ever had a vacation that went a little too long?
00:08:29.020 You know, like a week and you're saying, you know what, I want to go back to work.
00:08:32.620 So you view it that it was a vacation before and then Eve didn't listen and that was good?
00:08:37.740 Yeah, I think it introduced struggle, right?
00:08:39.640 But happiness forever and, like, if you're just happy all the time, there's not really a difference.
00:08:43.720 And I think, yeah, it was like idyllic and great, but after a certain point, I think it probably would have gotten boring.
00:08:54.080 And so we have all the struggle in life, but it's beautiful, right?
00:08:57.140 Like it's hard, like we have really hard times and hard days.
00:09:00.180 There's death, there's pain, but it's still fulfilling, you know?
00:09:03.220 How do you guys handle divorce here?
00:09:04.880 Like if a couple gets divorced, are they welcome back in?
00:09:08.220 Oh, yeah, absolutely.
00:09:09.020 I mean, my mother-in-law is divorced twice, actually, and she's the Relief Society president.
00:09:13.720 so yeah um no we uh i don't think for a long long time there's been any kind of like we're pretty
00:09:21.020 strong about like if you have a marriage you guys you try really hard to work it out right there's
00:09:24.500 there's a short list of things that would cause a marriage to be what if someone's like super crazy
00:09:28.820 can they yeah i mean like if your family's in danger you're in danger you're supremely in danger
00:09:34.000 just like super crazy yeah like it's complicated if there's kids crashing out daily yeah we've all
00:09:39.420 i'm sure you've dated a girl like that before you sure but um like imagine you're with the 0.80
00:09:43.860 crazy woman can you go yeah no i think it's it's it's between you and god i don't there's not a
00:09:49.200 rule book be like hey they have to either commit adultery or or do something like it's up to you 0.97
00:09:54.220 like you pray with the spirit you figure it out um and and it's up to you but no you're not
00:09:59.740 like we're not no one of the church is nitpicking why someone got divorced me you can't come back
00:10:03.980 you know um so i'm kind of curious would a member of clergy ever like testify in a family court if
00:10:11.120 they felt like um like one of the parties didn't mean it or like would that ever happen here
00:10:17.580 i don't think so um i guess it depends like if if if a member of the clergy like let's say our
00:10:24.360 bishop right he's the he's the leader of our these individual buildings um let's say a woman like a
00:10:31.580 man cheated on his wife and the woman confided in the bishop and said hey bishop i need your help
00:10:35.680 testifying in court for for uh stuff with my kids i think that i i don't know what the precedent is
00:10:41.780 but i'm sure like the bishop could in those instances like help um you know the bishop's
00:10:47.400 meant to help families so you'd have to exercise discretion but what is responsibility without
00:10:52.780 authority responsibility without authority um i don't know uh like if you're responsible from
00:11:00.900 someone but you have no authority over them i don't know i think that's just i guess being a
00:11:05.780 good neighbor like uh you know i'm not i'm not responsible for like i don't have authority over
00:11:13.440 my neighbor's health but if i start like dumping toxic waste in my backyard and it gets into his
00:11:20.640 and makes him sick i'm still responsible for that like so i don't know um it just it's it's
00:11:27.860 being a good neighbor.
00:11:30.260 Yeah, that's how I put it.