Pearl - Modern Women： Overestimating Themselves, Undervaluing Others

00:00:00.000 So Tia Mowry is reflecting on life one year after divorcing her ex of 14 years, Corey Hardrick.

00:00:08.760 On Wednesday, Tia shared a candid video on her Instagram recapping the life lessons she's learned

00:00:15.080 since her split. Recovering from a divorce feels like a whirlwind journey. So remember this is a

00:00:20.900 pattern. A lot of times when it's a social media thing, it's always a journey. Tia says in a

00:00:27.360 voiceover as she sat in bed. I found out through the whole process that divorce isn't a place where

00:00:32.500 we arrive. It's entering a new chapter in life with many nuances and no one size fits all

00:00:38.500 handbook. One moment you're relieved, feeling like you've conquered something significant,

00:00:42.900 then suddenly emotions hit you all over again. It's a side of divorce that often isn't discussed,

00:00:49.660 especially when the kids are involved. Tia and Corey share two children together,

00:00:54.380 their 12 year old son Cree and their five year old daughter Cairo. So these are the four. Tia

00:01:00.420 added that she wants to be a role model for her children showing them what resilience and self

00:01:05.280 care looks like. She also opened up about trying different things to help soothe and release the

00:01:11.000 emotional buildup living inside of her with activities like exercise, journaling, meditation

00:01:17.020 and therapy. I'm just being honest guys. I look at this and I think does this scream mature adult

00:01:23.420 woman. Sometimes I think that a lot of these divorcees are mentally still teenagers, like 15

00:01:30.540 tops. While reflecting on everything she's been through, Tia became emotional and began to cry.

00:01:37.140 Someday, I believe I'll be able to look back on this time with nothing but warmth and gratitude

00:01:41.820 for the beautiful children brought into my life and the stronger version of myself that emerged

00:01:46.060 from experience. As women, we take our power back by sharing our stories and bringing any deep shame

00:01:52.360 we hold from the experience to light. I love you guys. The game star and her ex were married 14

00:01:58.840 years after tying the knot in 2008. The two initially met back in 1999. Tia announced their

00:02:05.420 separation in October 2022 and they officially divorced in April 2023. Tia concluded her video

00:02:11.760 by asking her followers to share their experiences with divorce to collectively help the healing

00:02:18.000 process i found that through the process divorce is in a place where we arrive it's entering a new

00:02:23.620 chapter of life with many nuances and no one size fits all handbook one moment you're relieved

00:02:29.860 feeling like you've conquered something significant then suddenly waves of emotions hit you all over

00:02:37.260 again it's a side of divorce that isn't often discussed especially when there are kids involved

00:02:42.560 do you see how mad this kid is he's so sick of being on his mom's social media but but see this

00:02:47.980 is using your kids and your personal life as a prop for attention and generally what this means

00:02:56.600 is it's a proxy because they don't have people in their real life you strive to be a role model

00:03:02.120 teaching them resilience and self-care you try different things to soothe and release emotional

00:03:07.700 build up with exercise, journaling your thoughts, meditation, and seeking therapy to cope with the

00:03:15.300 breakup and the dreams you had for the future. It may sound cliche, but time truly does have a way

00:03:21.680 of soothing pain. Someday, I believe I'll be able to look back on this time with nothing but warmth

00:03:27.020 and gratitude. Can you imagine being this kid? Your mom just divorced your dad and now she's

00:03:31.280 trying to, she's saying, kids, kids, kids, take this hug for social media. Like you, you just

00:03:37.180 want to go to your mom and you want to get a hug, right? You want to say, mom, I just want a hug

00:03:43.920 and I want it to be amazing and I want to feel so good. And then your mom says, yeah, yeah, yeah,

00:03:48.320 that's fine. But let me just record this for my Instagram. Okay, honey, we can do it. Just hold

00:03:53.960 on. Let me just set the camera here. Okay, kids, come on. Can you imagine what life is like?

00:03:59.280 For the beautiful children brought into my life and the stronger version of myself that emerged

00:04:05.500 from the experience. For anyone who is going through this, I would love to hear your experience,

00:04:12.080 share your story, because there's power in dialogue. As women, we take our power back

00:04:17.540 by sharing our stories and bringing any deep shame we hold from this experience into the light.

00:04:24.320 I love you guys. Tia. Now, what is the problem with this? She is a high earning woman. Rich

00:04:31.020 people have different options and different lives. She is going to survive off of one income

00:04:37.360 if she's been smart with her money, and she will be fine the rest of her life. Many women that make

00:04:43.540 the same decision will not. In her montage, she is doing some trip with an elephant. Do you think

00:04:51.440 that's an option for the average woman's budget in this economy? And the other issue we get is

00:04:59.620 we have a plethora of comments. I love you. I know this journey hasn't been an easy one,

00:05:05.540 but I applaud you for doing the work to heal. My girl has been nonstop growing, working,

00:05:11.860 evolving, and healing. So it's all these women encouraging her. And there wasn't one that said,

00:05:16.780 hey, the grass may not be greener on the other side. Get back with your husband. Not one. Hey,

00:05:23.020 you might be making a mistake it's all women pushing women to make bad choices and i love

00:05:30.540 what i love is so many people say i make things up they say i'm just like making up some of these

00:05:36.340 things yeah yeah and i go on tiktok and there's a plethora of women just posting their divorce

00:05:43.380 stories not one i want i want you to take notice of a couple things these women come from all

00:05:49.440 different types of backgrounds that I'm going to show you. And I want you to ask the question

00:05:53.920 if this makes it seem like they take marriage as a serious commitment. People seem to think

00:05:59.420 that getting a divorce and having time away from the kids is a luxury, but I feel like it's anything

00:06:04.020 but that. This might just be because I don't always have friends and family nearby to hang

00:06:08.440 out with me, so it can feel really lonely. The first thing I did today was go to the gym for a

00:06:13.520 quick chest and cardio workout. Afterwards, I headed to the pool because the weather was beautiful

00:06:18.740 and I wanted to start my new book. Reading has been the only thing helping me these days and I

00:06:23.220 was fully prepared to spend the day here until I heard a buzzing behind my seat and found this

00:06:29.760 massive hive of bees. I cannot begin to tell you how fast I booked it out of there. I didn't even

00:06:36.120 make it to page five of my book until I made a run for it. These are moms with kids, right?

00:06:41.940 This is something you might, you would think to see from someone early 20s teenager, right?

00:06:46.640 mothers with kids vlogging their divorce i was gonna try to eat healthy today but honestly after

00:06:53.160 that fiasco i deserve some in and out also look at this bookmark i found of younger me today that

00:06:58.340 will help remind me of the love i deserve i'm only six months into the divorce but my entire

00:07:03.240 identity has revolved around being a mom for the last 10 years so adjusting has been hard but i'm

00:07:08.060 excited for what comes next well okay an unglamorous day in my life is a divorcee moving on to a

00:07:14.480 sailboat the first day i got up and then we drove to bed bath and beyond we had to go to two bed

00:07:19.100 baths and beyond because the order that i wanted just they couldn't fill it at once we went to the

00:07:23.180 first one which was an hour away three shopping carts worth but look at how cute that these green

00:07:28.380 cool towels are going to be i'm going to embroider them with the boat name i think in like a peachy

00:07:32.020 color this was the car after the first stop after that we went to kava and got lunch um and then

00:07:37.780 after we ate lunch we went to another bed bath and beyond and to target where we bought cleaning

00:07:42.540 supplies and then we went to best buy which i forgot to film but we got an ipad there and then

00:07:48.480 drove back to the boat this is the car all full i didn't realize it was a still picture and had to

00:07:54.900 load it up um in these carts and take it back to the boat uh and that's my boat and here is all of

00:08:02.500 the mess in the kitchen and we just kind of unloaded that it's a work in progress for sure

00:08:07.900 and then we did some work i tried to set up the ipad it's not going well and then we realized

00:08:12.440 we forgot to buy salt and pepper and also food we meant to go but we didn't and so we had toast

00:08:17.080 on eggs for dinner but i actually think that this content will get a lot more interesting maybe it

00:08:21.480 won't and my life's over okay bye healing after choosing to get a divorce can be unpredictable

00:08:27.400 most days i'm fine and i know i made the right decision but i'm also ignoring that scary voice

00:08:32.200 in my head that's telling me that i'm not going to be able to make it on my own i have to tell

00:08:36.120 myself every day that everything's going to be fine and it'll work itself out i got married at 19 and

00:08:42.040 and I've been a stay-at-home mom the majority of the last 10 years, so he's all I've ever known.

00:08:46.820 These days, I'm just winging it and living under the law of assumption. We deserve happiness,

00:08:50.820 and everything will work out the way it's supposed to. We got to stop saying that. We

00:08:55.420 got to stop saying that everything's going to work out statistically. We're in a lot of debt,

00:09:00.020 you know, but I hope it works out. I never wish anything bad on anyone, but I wouldn't bet on it.

00:09:06.640 Or at least that's what I tell myself. I'm taking everything one day at a time,

00:09:10.500 but thoughts haunt my mind with things like will my kids hate me one day for leaving will i ever be

00:09:15.860 happy i wish choosing my they might hate you one day for leaving yeah a lot of kids do i wouldn't

00:09:22.400 be surprised self for once in my life didn't make me feel so guilty and so alone okay well

00:09:27.740 oh that's the same girl i guess well i hope it works out you know

Pearl - October 06, 2024

Modern Women： Overestimating Themselves, Undervaluing Others ｜ Pearl Daily

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