Pearl - STREET TALK： Should Wives Obey Their Husbands？

00:00:00.000 The word obey, I think, just has, like, in this world, has such a negative connotation.

00:00:04.820 I'm trying to normalize it.

00:00:06.300 Yeah. You think he's equal to God?

00:00:07.980 No, but close.

00:00:09.580 We would just say right here, just to protect the worship experience on a Sunday morning,

00:00:13.860 we would prefer you to not be there.

00:00:16.500 What up, guys? Welcome to another episode of Street Talks.

00:00:20.540 Today, we are outside of Watermark Community Church,

00:00:23.400 asking Christian women the question,

00:00:27.520 should Christian women obey their husbands?

00:00:30.340 There's a lot of talk around this word,

00:00:32.560 and we're going to count the women today 0.93

00:00:34.660 if they say yes, no, or yes, but.

00:00:38.440 Okay, yes, well, I don't know about the word obey,

00:00:43.260 but they definitely are the head of the household.

00:00:46.140 We have a structure of, what's that word?

00:00:50.880 Authority.

00:00:51.680 So it's God and then your husband and then you.

00:00:54.520 So he protects you.

00:00:55.840 But you guys are equal in terms of value as humans.

00:01:00.340 And you rely on each other and submit to each other as you would to Christ.

00:01:04.120 Do you think it's okay for women to tell their husbands what to do?

00:01:08.600 Husbands should definitely ask and value our opinions.

00:01:13.020 So you can give their opinion. 0.99

00:01:14.900 But ultimately they get to make the final decision.

00:01:18.440 And that's okay.

00:01:19.580 So what's your answer?

00:01:20.520 my answer is it all depends on the man i believe that you have to be aligned with the holy spirit

00:01:27.440 with god and because it's gonna it's gonna uh if a man obeys god by nature he doesn't have to

00:01:35.060 demand the woman to obey it comes naturally so if he aligns with everything that the lord says

00:01:40.900 that god says his word says by nature or women will obey the man just like the laws of of what

00:01:48.160 god says you know that shall not kill of course when we're aligned with the lord everything falls

00:01:53.400 naturally so yes i do believe as long as the man is aligned with the god with the word of god no

00:01:58.320 right or wrong answers no gotchas just we want to know people's thoughts on the question um should

00:02:04.080 christian women obey their husbands if yes why if no why not um i think it's a weirdly worded

00:02:11.280 question because i don't think it's obey it's like they're partners um so husband and wives are

00:02:15.920 partners in marriage um and so when they make a covenant with one another in the same way that

00:02:19.920 it's a representation of the trinity which is god the father god the son god the holy spirit and so

00:02:24.540 the son submitted to the father that's why he died on the cross for our sins and so he submitted to

00:02:29.520 him but there's not a difference in like god the father god the son god the holy spirit because

00:02:34.880 they're all the same they're one they're a triune god so it's a representation of jesus to god and

00:02:39.880 so it's a different it's it's a weirdly worded question because wives don't just obey their

00:02:44.900 husbands, but in the same way that Christ submitted to his father, a woman would submit to

00:02:50.960 her husband. However, but a godly man who is submitted, who lays his life down just like

00:02:56.400 Christ, then he would not be in any way overpowering, abusive, or any of those things.

00:03:01.220 And so they work together. And so it's a weirdly worded question. Does that make sense?

00:03:05.260 What's weirdly worded about it? Like what's wrong with the word obey?

00:03:08.620 Because obey immediate means that there's like a master and it's like, hey, you must do what

00:03:12.560 this person says you have to do, but that's not what the Bible teaches. Does that make sense?

00:03:17.060 So it doesn't teach to obey your husband in all things? No, it does not. Okay. What does it say?

00:03:22.020 It says to submit. And so if you understand what submit, it's almost like a yielding to. So it's

00:03:26.580 like a, Hey, in the same way that you would yield to traffic, it's not that you completely stop.

00:03:30.260 You don't ever move on, but it's emerging onto a yielding to in the same way. Like I said,

00:03:34.780 that Jesus submits to the father. And so it's a, it's, it's a different word than obey when you

00:03:39.960 look like the different definitions and stuff. So we're just asking the question, do you think

00:03:43.620 that Christian women should obey their husbands? If yes, why? If no, why? I think when you get 1.00

00:03:49.580 married that yes, you should obey your husband. I think it's called that also as Christian women

00:03:55.580 that is talked about in the Bible to obey their husbands and follow their lead.

00:04:01.640 That doesn't take anything away from them as a woman, as a wife, but yes, that they follow the

00:04:07.940 lead of their husband and what's what they're called to in in the bible what do you think of

00:04:12.140 the question though obey not obey so for me like i think it's the should i think out of

00:04:23.280 see i'm not very good at like having it's okay i mean there's no right or wrong because

00:04:29.700 because of what christ has done for me on the cross and having a husband who's also a believer

00:04:36.660 But it's not a, I'm obeying him because he's over me.

00:04:42.140 I'm obeying him because we're a team.

00:04:47.280 It's not that he's above me in any way.

00:04:50.600 Well, what's wrong with him being above you?

00:04:52.480 Like, why would that be a bad thing?

00:04:55.600 I guess it wouldn't.

00:04:56.900 Yeah.

00:04:57.200 I mean, if he's leading as Christ leads the church, then why wouldn't I want to follow him?

00:05:06.660 Do you think you can be obedient and still tell a guy what to do?

00:05:11.760 Oh, absolutely.

00:05:13.360 Absolutely.

00:05:14.120 I mean, I feel like David and I have a great relationship that if there's something that I feel like because the Holy Spirit in me,

00:05:21.340 if there's something I see off that I should speak up, like that's my role.

00:05:27.800 He often says that I'm his voice of reason, and sometimes that I will help him see something in a different way.

00:05:38.900 But I feel like that, as believers, that's right.

00:05:40.680 You want to talk about the question of the day, guys?

00:05:43.600 Free will. It's America. You should be able to do whatever you want.

00:05:46.460 So you think they should or shouldn't?

00:05:48.920 It's up to you. It's a free will.

00:05:51.240 So who decides if he's, like, following God?

00:05:54.960 His walk with the Lord.

00:05:58.280 His actions speak louder than the words.

00:06:00.560 And what kind of actions would you say?

00:06:02.380 Loving man, gentle spirit, patient, love is kind, love is patient, love is not rude, love does not demand.

00:06:11.640 Everything, like I said, it's all by actions.

00:06:15.480 So, just question, a lot of times when I hear that, it's very broad.

00:06:19.920 so i'd like specific okay so obviously abuse we know that's not following god but and when i say

00:06:26.940 abuse it's hitting her yes okay or verbal or mental it's it goes abuse is also big abroad

00:06:33.260 yeah but what like okay is because i think a lot of times we don't talk about female abuse which

00:06:40.020 is like excessive nagging telling them what to do all the time that's also the same thing yes and

00:06:45.600 I think just in a marriage, like you're kind of bound to do something borderline abusive at some

00:06:50.900 point verbally, right? I just think over time that's bound to happen. So like, how do you

00:06:56.000 determine, you know, when you should follow him and when you shouldn't? I think he's a man,

00:07:02.100 right? He's not perfect. I think that's where the woman comes into place and just, uh, our job is

00:07:07.920 to pray for our husbands and allow God to change his heart while he allows, while he changes our

00:07:14.520 heart so it's both even you know i mean i believe that we're supposed to give the same grace that

00:07:19.600 god's given us and i believe that if he is a man of god he will listen he'll listen to the holy

00:07:25.840 spirit and that's where us women i do believe that you know women have a big part you know

00:07:31.840 and our part is to obey god and obey our husbands however not to where the extreme of where it's

00:07:38.980 manipulation or you know um that's where you have to really believe it's that's where unity

00:07:44.520 comes in you know i think it's a beautiful thing for women to use their gifts in order to care

00:07:48.720 for women but the thing is is like if there are bible studies that are gossiping and stuff then 0.74

00:07:53.480 yes we should call that out because that is a sin isn't there a verse about women being silent in

00:07:58.180 the back of the church but do you know the context of that what is the context i'm asking you because

00:08:04.440 you're quoting it and so do you know the context or do you just like cherry pick and like i cherry

00:08:09.080 pick all the time okay why is that why do you cherry pick just why don't why don't you tell

00:08:12.840 me the context yeah but you used it so i was trying to ask you i'm just i'm cherry picking 0.99

00:08:18.460 okay so so when you look at the context of that it was because those women were gossiping they

00:08:24.020 were divisive those specific women and so there's there's stuff in scripture where it's prescriptive

00:08:28.940 and descriptive so it's like prescribing something to us or describing some women today are not

00:08:33.840 gossipy. Not all. I've never met a woman in my life that does not gossip. Okay. So you gossip

00:08:39.500 too? Every woman does. Okay. I think you don't, you don't, you don't gossip ever. No, I'm saying

00:08:44.960 like, Hey, but if I do, I go ask for forgiveness. We have a thing here that we call the kind of our

00:08:49.340 24 hour principle. Like if I come and say like, Hey Susie over here, she's getting on my nerves

00:08:54.940 or whatever. Um, like we really encourage people to say like, Hey, we want you to specifically

00:09:00.440 like go and talk to that person. Like if you're going to be sharing information here or you're

00:09:05.420 frustrated with them or you're upset with them, we encourage you to like go and have that

00:09:09.080 conversation with her. Um, like that's what we're going to encourage you to do because we do believe

00:09:13.800 gossip is something that creates, creates divine. Yeah, I totally agree. I have a hard time

00:09:18.280 believing there's special women at this church that are different from women everywhere or

00:09:23.080 churches everywhere. Um, should Christian women obey their husbands? I think the answer is yes. 1.00

00:09:28.800 And I think it's a mutual answer because I believe that husbands should honor their wives.

00:09:35.280 And I believe that women should obey their husband.

00:09:40.240 But at the end, we're all to obey Christ and do as the Bible has instructed us to do.

00:09:46.500 So I don't think it's a negative term to say obey your wife or to obey your husband or children to obey your parents.

00:09:53.540 I think it's biblical.

00:09:55.280 So, yeah, I would say no different than we are to obey God,

00:09:59.180 that women should honor their husbands and men should honor their wives.

00:10:06.520 Do you feel like that all of us fall short of the glory of God every day, though? 1.00

00:10:09.620 Yeah, but women worse. 1.00

00:10:11.140 Women worse. 1.00

00:10:11.780 Yeah, correct. 1.00

00:10:12.660 Okay.

00:10:13.140 Why do you believe that?

00:10:14.640 I have eyes.

00:10:15.700 Okay.

00:10:16.480 So do you believe that certain sins are above other sins? 0.99

00:10:20.020 like is that um i just would say that women when you've aborted an eighth of the world population 1.00

00:10:26.100 that's pretty bad so i would say like females are just sitting in public like they're dressing half 0.56

00:10:32.980 naked to church i don't know i'm not saying this one you guys have actually been pretty good but 0.97

00:10:37.220 in general like um women have a lot of power in society we have the most buying power political

00:10:44.240 power um and the issue you get is you kind of see what happens when women get power 0.96

00:10:51.760 a third of women have an std an eighth um a third of women wait sorry you can't one's a third one's

00:10:59.920 a quarter a quarter of women have had have an std a third of women have had an abortion we've 0.53

00:11:04.540 aborted an eighth of the world population we're in mountains of debt we have glut like amazon like 0.73

00:11:09.160 we have gluttonous spending habits and it's just not the same for men what do you see for

00:11:14.100 men? They don't abort an eighth of the world population. Do they support it though? Do they

00:11:21.240 pay for it? No, because it's mostly women that vote for it. They have to pay for it. They have 1.00

00:11:27.460 no choice. It comes out of taxpayer dollars a lot of the time. Like in different states?

00:11:33.840 I mean, here's the thing. It's like we live in a fallen, broken world where abortion exists,

00:11:41.280 where abuse exists where pornography exists where all these things exist like the bible tells us

00:11:45.960 that things like this are going to happen where we live in a fallen broken world um and so that's

00:11:50.600 why we as believers as christians instead of just calling out sin and being kind of sin hunters like

00:11:55.940 we want to offer them the grace of jesus and saying like hey like there's forgiveness of sins

00:11:59.820 there's grace there's mercy like and so that's why we try here really hard to say like hey if

00:12:05.040 that's your story like come find the true healer which is jesus and so we can point out all the

00:12:09.700 Well, I'm not against that. 0.82

00:12:11.220 You just asked, like, why I think women sin more than men.

00:12:14.000 I just think men are closer to God.

00:12:15.960 Okay.

00:12:16.340 So.

00:12:18.000 I mean, which kind of lines up with the order of the world, right? 0.56

00:12:21.380 God, men, women, children.

00:12:23.200 Have you found that, like, asking these questions, like, what does it produce?

00:12:26.860 Like, what does it help do?

00:12:28.500 Or, like, your YouTube channel or whatever?

00:12:30.660 Like, what's the hope in, like, asking these questions?

00:12:32.720 I like to make people think.

00:12:34.640 For me, I don't understand why obey is such a controversial word.

00:12:39.700 So, and I think there's a lot of discourse online and, um, I like to see is what's online,

00:12:49.040 does it match real life?

00:12:50.200 And so I like to go into real life and talk to people.

00:12:53.040 It's, I'm not trying to make people look bad or get a gotcha.

00:12:56.660 Um, I can't, I can't help how like small channels clip it.

00:13:00.060 Right.

00:13:00.280 But I post the full thing.

00:13:01.740 Yeah, no, totally.

00:13:02.440 And I don't, you're not combative or anything.

00:13:04.500 Like I don't see that at all or hear that at all. 1.00

00:13:06.520 How can a woman be obedient if she's telling him what to do? 1.00

00:13:09.560 I don't know if she's telling him what to do. 1.00

00:13:10.680 Well, in the chores example.

00:13:11.920 Oh, the chores example.

00:13:12.760 Doing what the chores.

00:13:13.380 Yeah, like if you're saying you need to do this.

00:13:14.660 I think we're getting like really complicated on a non-complicated thing.

00:13:17.820 Like you're saying like the 51% should go to be the highest, most disagreement ever.

00:13:23.500 Like I'm talking like big problems.

00:13:25.660 You saying like, hey, can you take out the trash?

00:13:28.300 Yeah.

00:13:28.840 And he's like, no, I'm a man.

00:13:30.340 Yeah.

00:13:30.520 I'm not saying that's a healthy, that's not a healthy dynamic to begin with.

00:13:33.740 Well, I use it because it's common.

00:13:35.360 Yes, I agree.

00:13:36.140 This is common.

00:13:36.880 Yeah.

00:13:36.980 You could say spending too much money. 0.99

00:13:39.200 You could be like, you know, some women tell their husbands to spend less money or spend it on. 0.96

00:13:44.580 Like the whole point is telling him what to do. 0.95

00:13:46.860 How can you be obedient if you're telling him what to do?

00:13:49.720 I think some of it's like heart posture, right?

00:13:51.440 Like telling him what to do versus coming together and mutually deciding something are very different things.

00:13:57.340 I think it is a dangerous precedent in any relationship to work from a heart posture of telling something what to do.

00:14:04.420 I think saying like hey I need you to take out the trash or as a family we need to steward God's

00:14:10.100 money better and this is how we steward it is vastly different than me telling you what to do 0.96

00:14:13.500 yeah but when are women good with money I think we should start doing bows for our boyfriends and 0.94

00:14:18.420 husbands we can bow to them that's crazy what you want to bow to your boyfriend and husband yeah I 1.00

00:14:26.140 like I like to give a little bow before I give him food why just to show some submission you know

00:14:32.280 i do not agree with that i think we bow to god we can bow to bow to him you know you think he's

00:14:40.420 equal to god no but close scripture tells us to not have any other gods or idols that's why i said

00:14:46.600 just under just under yeah just under well okay pearl right yeah yes okay well it's nice to meet

00:14:52.120 you nice to meet you yes glad we got to talk so last question if the pastor tells the woman one

00:14:57.980 thing and the husband says another, who should she listen to? Which one is biblical? Well,

00:15:03.320 the Bible is up to interpretation, right? I know every, I've been to a lot of churches and everyone

00:15:07.340 thinks that like their interpretation is correct. So I don't think we could like sit here and say

00:15:12.800 it's like cut and dry because there's so much argument about it. So I'm saying the pastor says

00:15:18.380 one thing, the husband says another, who should she listen to? They both are interpreting in a

00:15:23.500 different way? Well, I mean, I think scholars go back over time and they do debate the Bible. I

00:15:29.000 think if Jesus, if it's interpreted as the words of Jesus and it's correctly interpreted, I would

00:15:37.300 say whichever one is biblical. Right. But she's got to pick one. She's, they both are saying

00:15:44.000 they're biblical. I mean, it would come down to a case by case basis, but it would, it would go

00:15:50.860 back to truth in the book of God. What do you think about women telling their husbands what to 1.00

00:15:57.480 do? Can you still be obedient if you tell your husband what to do? I think there's a way to have 1.00

00:16:01.960 a conversation and talk it out and be able to express what their thoughts are in a situation,

00:16:07.280 so what their views are. There is an opportunity for them to have that and express their views or

00:16:13.440 their differences in a conversation, just like you would have a conversation with someone else.

00:16:18.020 What are your thoughts on the question?

00:16:20.480 Well, I'm not married, so I don't have a ton of thoughts.

00:16:23.480 But I do think Scripture is clear where it says to submit to your husband.

00:16:27.500 What that means isn't necessarily do what they say and only what they say,

00:16:31.320 because the other side of that is they're supposed to care and love for their wives.

00:16:35.620 And so it's as Jesus is the head of the church, so is the man of the household.

00:16:42.900 And yet women have come along as the helper and completer of that.

00:16:46.320 And so I think it's actually a beautiful working together kind of thing.

00:16:51.980 And so I'm not married.

00:16:53.060 And do you post this anywhere?

00:16:54.580 Yeah, on YouTube.

00:16:55.500 Okay.

00:16:55.940 As you're asking people to speak this, are you telling them that they're going to be on YouTube or anything?

00:17:01.800 Yeah.

00:17:02.180 I mean, it's pretty obvious with a mic and a camera.

00:17:04.560 But it's a one-party consent state.

00:17:06.320 So it's public property.

00:17:08.240 Totally.

00:17:08.860 Yeah.

00:17:09.600 My short answer would be like, I would hope that a Christian woman and man would work in concert as a team. 1.00

00:17:16.320 inside the confines of marriage is that an answer does that count do you think that christian women

00:17:20.420 should obey their husbands what do you define as obedience submit to as in like being inferior

00:17:27.200 sure um women are christian women are not necessarily inferior to their husbands however

00:17:35.380 there's a verse in the bible that says you should honor your husband and the husband should honor

00:17:39.940 the wife so that looks in a form of like obedience of kind of looking to them as the male of the

00:17:48.020 household or like the greater maybe like decision maker but also the man also has that responsibility 0.81

00:17:54.180 for the woman do you think it's in a woman's place to tell a man what to do no

00:18:00.400 that's pretty good actually i didn't think okay just context youtube channel i'm single

00:18:09.920 and not the right person to ask this but i feel like even being single a lot of people are very

00:18:15.800 like independent and like even as a woman i'm looking for a man who i guess like is strong

00:18:24.120 and like wants to take charge and so that's all what do you think about like women telling their

00:18:28.540 husbands to do the chores in the house um i mean i think they should definitely like again it goes 0.92

00:18:35.960 back to like honoring each other so like hopefully that like the man is willing to help out for the

00:18:42.420 greater good of the household but like it should also be like both hurt people last one before the 0.63

00:18:47.600 wind takes us do you think it's okay for women to tell their husbands what to do no not in that way 0.62

00:18:54.080 absolutely not i believe that there's a way i believe that you can suggest and say hey honey

00:18:59.100 you know what about this you know but not tell them what to do i don't believe that all right

00:19:03.060 guys thanks for watching the weather is gonna take us out today so we gotta go but thank you

00:19:07.620 so much for watching let me know what you think in the comments also no bashing the people in

00:19:12.780 the interviews we're trying to keep it nice so people keep doing these interviews with us

00:19:16.420 and but you can put your thoughts below respectfully like the video i'll see you next time

Pearl - May 14, 2026

STREET TALK： Should Wives Obey Their Husbands？

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