Pearl - June 15, 2026


Street Talks: Should Christian Women Obey Their Husbands? UK EDITION


Episode Stats


Length

20 minutes

Words per minute

171.13

Word count

3,542

Sentence count

93


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
00:00:00.340 Alright, what's up guys? Welcome to my YouTube channel. Today I'm in England, but this jet lag kind of caught up to me and I completely overslept all of the math services for this video, so I don't really know what I'm going to do now.
00:00:22.160 so I think I'm just going to go to a few churches
00:00:27.000 and see if anyone's there
00:00:29.320 maybe some Muslim areas
00:00:32.720 because I think they pray a lot
00:00:34.040 and ask what their opinions are on obedience
00:00:37.360 this may go good, this may go not good
00:00:40.600 I don't really know
00:00:41.380 so anyways, I'm going to just see
00:00:45.960 what people think
00:00:48.240 I'm going to test out this Methodist church
00:00:50.880 here we go
00:00:52.960 it's like three in the afternoon
00:00:57.040 I literally slept till one I couldn't believe it
00:00:59.600 jet lag is real guys
00:01:01.320 it's like what churches are going to be awake at night
00:01:06.120 oh my god
00:01:08.940 is there like a
00:01:10.940 are you the priest or preacher
00:01:13.320 oh okay
00:01:16.320 I do a video project where I go to different churches
00:01:19.500 and I ask what they believe when it comes to obedience.
00:01:22.800 There's no right or wrong answers.
00:01:24.520 It's just to understand what people believe.
00:01:28.540 So I was just wondering if there's anyone here
00:01:30.580 that can maybe speak on behalf of the church
00:01:32.760 or tell me what you guys believe here.
00:01:34.960 Sean, our minister will be here.
00:01:36.640 And your survey is about, did you say obedience?
00:01:39.360 Obedience, yeah, because different churches
00:01:42.020 have different opinions on it.
00:01:43.900 I'm not to say one's right or wrong.
00:01:45.880 It's not meant to be.
00:01:46.720 You're just exploring it.
00:01:47.560 yeah i just want to know what people's opinions are um so because some churches say that in a
00:01:55.000 marriage the women should be obedient oh some say obedience right yeah some some say they shouldn't
00:02:00.920 i'm i personally i'd like to say i don't think one is right or wrong i think people have a right to
00:02:05.560 do what they want in their churches um absolutely so we're fairly inclusive and believe in equality
00:02:11.240 in this church um we we have same sex marriages as well as heterosexual marriages okay so we're
00:02:18.520 very open and i don't think we particularly want to say that men should be in control and
00:02:22.680 okay women should obey them that's what i think cool cool okay sean will i'm sure he'll talk to
00:02:28.680 you but you might not have time until after this that's i could wait till after yeah i mean
00:02:33.720 i missed all the services this morning yeah what's your name my name is hannah
00:02:37.400 hannah and i'm val nice to meet you nice to meet you yeah and you also don't have to answer any
00:02:43.180 questions if there's one you don't like you can just say next and we can just does it make sense
00:02:46.980 yeah that's fine okay so um the first thing could you summarize what you guys believe here
00:02:51.600 um can i talk for myself rather than yeah yeah yeah yourself um so oh hang on we're going to
00:02:59.140 get disturbed so as a christian i believe in god and i believe in jesus christ
00:03:04.800 um i've always felt that we are more than just our minds and our bodies that we all have a
00:03:13.140 spiritual side to us um and for some people that's just a very human spirit but for myself
00:03:20.240 um the church is is a sort of deeper religious spirit um i feel as if i literally i believe in
00:03:28.700 god holds us in the palm of his hands and will always be there for us could you talk a little
00:03:33.780 bit more about what the um teachings here on are on obedience i don't think i can somebody else
00:03:41.780 will have to explain that i'm not very theological okay because we're just asking if you guys
00:03:46.600 believe in marriage that women should obey their husbands and submit to them there's no right or
00:03:51.660 wrong answers it's totally fine if you believe one or the other so we very rarely have marriage
00:03:56.280 ceremonies although we can do them here we are also licensed for same-sex marriages um as far
00:04:02.160 as I know, over the last decades, we've had a handful of marriages, and none of them have
00:04:08.660 used those words. But I believe it's a personal decision. We would not advocate it. But if
00:04:15.660 a couple came along and wanted to use those words, then in a way that they're more or
00:04:20.740 less allowed to choose the words they want to use, they could. I haven't heard it for
00:04:25.540 many, many years. So how do you guys decide, because I know some churches say that same
00:04:32.700 sex marriage is not allowed and some say it's allowed. What makes you guys interpret the
00:04:37.960 Bible in a way that would, like, do you guys believe it's in the Bible? Do you think the
00:04:42.580 Bible is outdated? Like, why is that a disagreement? Yeah, that's a bit too theological for me.
00:04:47.740 The Methodist hierarchy have discussed it at length.
00:04:54.820 We want to be inclusive.
00:04:56.380 We feel that God would want people to be inclusive.
00:04:59.260 But for some people, it's a bit of a red line.
00:05:03.560 And so some churches, some ministers might make a personal decision
00:05:09.260 and that they would be uncomfortable to hold the ceremony.
00:05:13.480 Yeah, because that was my question, because I'm from Texas.
00:05:16.060 and I think the Methodist churches there
00:05:19.240 don't agree with it but I'm not sure
00:05:20.880 I'm not Methodist
00:05:22.400 we have tried
00:05:25.540 to tread very carefully because you're
00:05:27.520 absolutely right, across the world
00:05:28.960 there are different, obviously there are different faiths
00:05:31.460 but there are also different
00:05:32.700 parts to the whole church
00:05:35.240 where some people would believe and some
00:05:37.060 people would agree and some people wouldn't agree
00:05:39.140 and this is about
00:05:40.560 working together
00:05:42.980 and doing what we can to work together
00:05:45.060 so another question I have is around marriage do you think that because marriage is kind of
00:05:51.240 disappearing in my generation like under 30 I think only 20% of us get married which is very
00:05:56.980 different is that the worldwide statistics only because I know a lot of young people have turned
00:06:01.460 the tide and they actually really do believe in getting married I've been to plenty of young
00:06:05.800 weddings yeah um not in America I don't know off the top of my head stats here just in America
00:06:11.980 There was a new survey that came out.
00:06:14.200 I would agree with you that about 10, 20 years ago, that was absolutely the case, but it seems to be resurging.
00:06:19.780 Well, there is kind of a thought process online saying that there's nothing that either gender gets out of marriage.
00:06:26.480 Do you think that's true? Do you think that's untrue?
00:06:29.560 I suppose I wouldn't genderize it.
00:06:32.600 For me, it's about a couple might want that to be their next step in their relationship.
00:06:40.400 They want to make that commitment to each other.
00:06:42.380 And by going through the marriage ceremony, some believe that they make that commitment more strong.
00:06:49.020 And do you think that women should obey their husbands in marriage?
00:06:52.520 Personally, no.
00:06:53.820 But then personally, I think too much is made of what men would say, what women would say and whatever like that.
00:06:59.720 Do you think there's differences between men and women or we're the same?
00:07:03.800 I don't think anybody's the same.
00:07:05.220 um but it is about um supporting and understanding differences okay perfect thank you so much that
00:07:13.460 was great that church is like a pet service so i think the people there i i over i got lucky i
00:07:21.760 overslept this morning all the church services and today i guess they're doing a pet service
00:07:27.700 at this methodist church um but according to the woman we're going to talk to the priest after
00:07:32.640 hopefully um they believe in gay marriage there which to me is like completely contradictory
00:07:39.700 to the bible and it's also kind of confusing because i'm from texas or i live in texas
00:07:45.440 and in texas all of the um all of the methodist churches there i've heard are more traditional
00:07:54.040 but it's like i come to london and they're like no gay we do gay marriages here i'm like what
00:08:00.420 but everybody's really nice there um you know i just want the audience to say these people even
00:08:08.920 though i might disagree with some of their beliefs are allowing me into their church
00:08:13.000 um and being gracious so i do ask that we attack ideas um but we're completely respectful
00:08:22.920 to the people that are agreeing to be in these interviews because
00:08:27.320 if we're doing journalism you know we want we want people to be honest about what they believe
00:08:36.260 and not lie about it and if you know if we have my audience attacking the people
00:08:41.360 um then you know i think people are going to be less likely to agree in the future so
00:08:50.000 we want to be totally respectful so i'm going to get my coffee and i'm going to go back to that
00:08:55.540 church and really just ask them more about what they believe so i'll see you guys so i'm sean
00:09:02.380 sanders i'm the minister here at walton methodist church which is just outside london in surrey just
00:09:08.540 on the south side of the thames yes and hopefully i can i can put across some of the um how other
00:09:15.540 people have have understood things how the church understands things so I've
00:09:20.700 got that particular I guess experience but I'm not you know we can't be
00:09:27.900 overbearing on people people have to see things for themselves and make sense of
00:09:34.200 their own experience experience is part of the kind of a particular methods
00:09:37.720 done methodist understanding of faith it has to make sense in our experience
00:09:42.180 for all of us so what are some of the disagreements here with other churches that make you guys a
00:09:48.000 little bit different i wouldn't say we particularly disagree we might have particular emphasis we
00:09:54.240 have particular emphasis um so we are registered for same-sex marriage now not all churches i'm
00:10:00.440 i'm not sure if any other church is registered for same-sex marriage in this area i mean that's
00:10:05.540 a particular i guess within the church now debate taking place but we're very proud that we we are
00:10:11.740 register for same-sex marriage i mean not everybody in the church might not in this church
00:10:16.240 might not particularly have supported it but they but they they've kind of accepted that
00:10:24.180 that's what we do as a church so what i just know the comments are coming to come for that yes like
00:10:32.620 what bible verses support that would you say well i think just the general uh idea that that god's
00:10:39.220 lovers for all i mean there are particular passages where people perhaps quote perhaps
00:10:45.520 against same-sex relationships but but i would say they're more about about abusive relationships and
00:10:51.400 it's about the fruit of relationships rather than kind of necessarily the form i mean it's
00:10:57.420 very complex and we've had quite a abusive like what is that you think there's i might be
00:11:03.940 misunderstood yes that there's abusive relationships in the bible well i think there are actually but
00:11:09.220 um you know uh um but which are examples which are exact well i mean well the bible is full of
00:11:15.620 is full of kind of the history of people quite complex stories we've got we've got to approach it
00:11:20.580 um in the light of the holy spirit guarding us today in the light of what jesus teaches in the
00:11:25.540 light of our experience in the light of the kind of the underlying principles of faith i mean you
00:11:30.660 You cannot take Bible passages out of context.
00:11:34.680 They're in a context, and also the context that we live in as well.
00:11:38.780 Oh, so that's a good question.
00:11:40.320 And what is the Bible verse that people take out of context?
00:11:43.920 I'm not an expert on it.
00:11:45.160 I cannot quote now, just kind of with coffee in my hand.
00:11:48.680 But it's just worth saying that all churches are going through this process.
00:11:52.540 We went through this process of Methodism.
00:11:54.260 In fact, I've done it many times.
00:11:55.520 But we went through a process called, we did go through a process around the kind of, just at the end of the last decade and at the early part of this decade.
00:12:06.600 And the outcome of which was that churches can opt in to same-sex marriage as they've been able to opt in to register for opposite-sex marriages.
00:12:17.700 and you know traditionally also the Methodist churches marry divorcees
00:12:21.600 where you know a former partner is still living
00:12:26.340 now that was a great piece of ministry for the Methodist church
00:12:30.520 I think in the second part of the 20th century
00:12:34.440 so we married people when many other churches didn't marry divorcees
00:12:38.640 and people found great strength and hope through that
00:12:45.160 And so there are, you know, churches do do things in some different ways.
00:12:49.200 We have particular emphasis.
00:12:50.960 So one of the things that's confusing, just to someone that's not religious,
00:12:54.200 is if it's the same Bible, like, what is the context people are noticing?
00:12:59.260 Like, when I read something out of, like, I don't know, any normal book,
00:13:02.940 it seems like the context is usually pretty clear, you know?
00:13:06.700 So what do you think maybe Church A, Church B, Church C might interpret the context different because of?
00:13:13.660 history people's experience perhaps the traditions of that church it could be a
00:13:22.740 number of different factors and you know we talked about this morning about the
00:13:28.200 sense that we're all on pilgrimages we do we do change our understandings and
00:13:32.840 develop understandings and some people say well that's not possible and I would
00:13:37.180 argue of course it's possible most of us are changing most of us having
00:13:40.480 developing understandings maybe of war and peace of um use of weapons all kinds of different
00:13:46.620 issues uh you know climate change uh people have different ways in which they approach that
00:13:53.740 i don't know if i agree with that you don't have to no i was just i'm curious if i give you my
00:13:58.900 thought yes because it seems like to me if something's true it remains true over time
00:14:03.880 like for example like usually i think the truth comes out like eventually and like i don't know
00:14:10.760 it seems just i'm younger than you so maybe when i get older this will change well you say
00:14:14.680 eventually you're accepting that there's a sense of process we all grow we're on pilgrimages we
00:14:19.560 might understand things differently as we get older our experience might change that understanding
00:14:25.000 our context we might study something it might not be the bible it could be other something else
00:14:31.480 which we think actually i understand that a bit differently now i don't know sometimes you get
00:14:36.120 new information and it makes past stuff make sense yeah yes yeah okay so part of this um
00:14:43.640 i guess question is around obedience right i was just wondering what do you guys and there's no
00:14:48.120 right or wrong answers i what do you guys teach in terms of obedience in the bible and in there
00:14:54.760 i don't think it's not about obedience about faithfulness that's a better word and it covers
00:14:59.560 marriage and it covers um life in general it's about being being faithful and about being humble
00:15:05.400 as well that we don't always get things right we don't always understand things right and part of
00:15:11.320 our journey is perhaps learning learning things we get things wrong um and just generally growing
00:15:18.040 and to be and to live faithful lives well i guess my question is do you think women should obey
00:15:22.840 their husbands in marriage no that's not that's not scriptural i mean i don't think that's
00:15:27.080 i don't think that's part of you know that but traditionally that there was that language in um
00:15:32.520 in the church's marriage services but it's not in our latest marriage service no it's about it's
00:15:39.240 about uh commitment you know between two people it's about uh commitment and faithfulness my
00:15:44.440 question is then how in a marriage would people come to a decision because like uh for example
00:15:49.800 let's say the woman wants the kids this was just a fight i saw growing up yes yes yes
00:15:56.120 If a man wants to save money, he says, this is too expensive.
00:15:58.880 The woman says, let's send him to the nicest private school.
00:16:02.340 Somebody's got to make a decision.
00:16:03.960 Well, I think sometimes when we say it's equal, it kind of makes the unreasonable person,
00:16:10.840 like if there is a reasonable person and unreasonable, typically to give in.
00:16:14.500 But the way, yes, but the way, but the way to, I don't think the way to,
00:16:18.140 that can be quite tough and quite difficult.
00:16:19.920 Obviously, you know, sometimes relationships can break up over disagreement.
00:16:22.960 But the way to deal with that, the way not to deal with that, is to say, therefore, one of the couple have the final say.
00:16:31.480 It's about working it out and working it with discussion, with prayer, with consultation, with counselling.
00:16:37.760 That's still going to come to different conclusions.
00:16:40.000 You know, people are, anyone growing up will see our parents.
00:16:43.600 Yes.
00:16:44.220 There is no way over the course of a marriage, at some point, someone has to make a choice.
00:16:48.920 you know if that might be how a couple work it out but i don't think you can impose and say one
00:16:56.840 of the couple have the final say i don't think that's that you can i don't in terms of the kind
00:17:02.700 of the faithfulness and the fruitfulness we talk about in our methodist tradition i don't think
00:17:07.420 that's an appropriate way then of reflecting that okay so um one of the questions we have um i'm not
00:17:14.200 religious, but I'm open, right? Yes. So I have questions about what they teach here
00:17:18.960 about obedience. There's no right or wrong answer. I'm wondering in marriage, do you
00:17:23.300 guys believe that it's equal or that the women should obey the men? There's no right or wrong
00:17:28.300 answers, just one. I don't believe the women should have to obey the men. So the men obey
00:17:36.300 to women? They're equal? What do you guys do when you disagree? I hope you're able to
00:17:49.540 compromise and find a way when there's difficulty. And what do you guys think here that's maybe
00:17:57.780 different than other churches? I've probably been coming here for about three years now,
00:18:05.180 But the first time I came here, I decided I was going to go to one or two churches to see what I thought of them.
00:18:12.340 And I'd been to several churches, and I walked in here, and by the end of the service, I knew this was the right place for me.
00:18:19.540 Everybody's so friendly and kind, and it just felt like coming home.
00:18:27.400 What's your marriage advice?
00:18:29.140 What advice would you give?
00:18:30.540 My generation's not getting married as much, right?
00:18:33.800 So I'm 29, so people in their 20s aren't getting married like they used to.
00:18:38.660 What's your advice for somebody that wants to get married?
00:18:43.120 It's just finding somebody for whom you're suitable and who's suitable for you, isn't it?
00:18:48.740 What do you think are the roles and responsibilities in marriage?
00:18:51.840 That's the last question.
00:18:53.160 Hopefully they're shared.
00:18:54.700 They're shared?
00:18:56.180 So equal protection, equal provisioning, equal...
00:19:02.120 As much as possible, as many as possible.
00:19:04.220 Perfect.
00:19:04.780 Okay.
00:19:05.600 That's all I have.
00:19:06.660 Thanks very much indeed.
00:19:08.280 All right, guys.
00:19:09.040 So I left the Methodist church.
00:19:14.280 Really interesting.
00:19:17.680 You know, it's kind of crazy.
00:19:19.060 There was a woman that was married 34 years that said it should be the other way around.
00:19:24.760 Again, not something I agree with, but we attack ideas, not the people here.
00:19:29.060 All right, guys, we got Auntie Jenny back on the channel.
00:19:33.220 Hi.
00:19:33.760 So what religion are you?
00:19:36.220 Christian.
00:19:37.040 Do you think women should obey their husbands?
00:19:40.000 Yes.
00:19:40.880 Yes? No yes but?
00:19:42.920 No buts. It's biblical.
00:19:45.080 You cannot be a Christian and not obey your husband.
00:19:47.180 But isn't it crazy how I go to all these churches and they, like, stand in front of the sign and stuff?
00:19:52.900 They need to read the Bible a bit more because it's this there.
00:19:56.280 A woman is a helper. That's what she's made for.
00:19:58.300 yeah oh shoot and it's not to say we don't fall short obviously like we all do right we all do
00:20:04.600 we're all sinners but you still gotta listen to the men yeah but we gotta we gotta at least
00:20:08.460 acknowledge the ideal yeah that's what you you can't be a christian and not listen to your man
00:20:14.220 yeah it's a bit silly if you're not listening to your man check your bible you're not a proper
00:20:20.180 wife okay what is your advice to women that want to obey but like how what's like advice to obey
00:20:28.100 better i guess like because i'm sure there's been times in your life where you don't want to listen
00:20:31.700 at all close your mouth and open your ears and smile nicely
00:20:39.380 all right guys so you heard it from the horse's mouth