Pearl - May 15, 2026


Terrible Wives Speak Out About Being Awful


Episode Stats


Length

12 minutes

Words per minute

209.89366

Word count

2,625

Sentence count

27

Harmful content

Misogyny

13

sentences flagged

Toxicity

34

sentences flagged

Hate speech

11

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I m talking about how I ve been a terrible wife, and how I m learning to be a better one. I m not perfect, and I mess up a lot, but I m growing into the woman I am today.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 she's talking about her thing as her kids like crying in the background what's going on guys 1.00
00:00:05.120 i've been saying for a while that most women are actually horrible wives and mothers and too long 0.97
00:00:10.320 we have pushed this narrative that women are nurturing and good parents and even the better 0.99
00:00:14.560 parents which is absolutely ridiculous so today we actually have women admitting they were terrible
00:00:20.320 wives um so i do love it when women have some accountability um we can't all be good at 1.00
00:00:24.720 everything and some women it's just you know being a wife wasn't in their life you know whatever the 0.91
00:00:29.040 god gods or crier power creator had in store for them okay hot take but hear me out now that i'm 0.73
00:00:35.120 divorced i think i was kind of a shitty wife and i'm okay with saying that now the the past few
00:00:41.840 years have given me a chance to really look at myself i can see who i was back then the mistakes 0.86
00:00:47.040 i made the selfishness the moments i didn't give my best um being so consumed in motherhood that
00:00:52.800 maybe i wasn't a great partner and that's okay i needed to be that person to get to who i am today
00:00:59.040 And to be honest, I absolutely love who I'm becoming and who I've become.
00:01:02.380 I'm stronger.
00:01:03.260 I'm more patient.
00:01:04.360 I'm more resilient.
00:01:05.340 Yeah, because she has no choice. 0.98
00:01:06.600 Like, she's older and uglier.
00:01:07.840 So you've got to be more patient because what other choice do you have?
00:01:11.800 The guys aren't running, you know.
00:01:13.220 More disciplined, definitely more emotionally aware.
00:01:15.920 And I would go as far as to say a way better mom.
00:01:18.980 So every hardship, every challenge, every reflection has led me to this version of myself,
00:01:24.380 my happiest, most authentic self.
00:01:26.520 so while I take full accountability for the end of my marriage and for my faults in it
00:01:31.080 I also recognize that I wasn't with someone who could help me grow into the person I am today
00:01:36.620 okay let's see what's next last year I was a terrible wife last year I was a really terrible
00:01:42.220 wife not because I didn't love my husband but because I was prideful and I wanted control 1.00
00:01:47.740 and I thought very difficult for women that's again women that talk too highly about submission
00:01:52.860 usually they've never been submissive so that i knew what was best i rolled my eyes more than i
00:02:00.620 prayed i criticized more than i encouraged and i thought that submission was a dirty word
00:02:05.760 little did i know the safety and security i would find being under biblical authority
00:02:11.860 i treated leadership like a threat instead of a gift and i was constantly trying to change him
00:02:19.160 but god you have to understand that our way is never the best way it's actually always the worst 0.72
00:02:23.520 way we never like imagine how much leg up in life like women have had in general and just how much
00:02:29.360 we still find a way to mess it up and not only that then we have the ego of thinking that we do
00:02:34.500 it right it's just incredible god really needed to change me this year i am choosing a different way
00:02:40.540 i am choosing god's way i am learning that submission is not silence it is strength under
00:02:46.720 control i'm learning that honoring my husband does not mean that i am shrinking but i am rising to
00:02:53.440 the calling of a godly wife i still mess up a lot i'm not perfect but instead of fighting i am
00:03:03.440 praying and instead of being full of bitterness i am choosing to give it all i think most marriages
00:03:10.800 would be solved if we just shut up forever i ain't looking it gets all of us if we just shut
00:03:15.840 up forever i think our marriages we would have perfect marriages and peace on earth the lord
00:03:20.080 instead of she's talking about her thing is her kids like crying in the background
00:03:25.180 women are incredible they're like mom watch us she's like i'm busy talking about how i was a
00:03:30.860 terrible wife last year isn't he doing more it's how can i serve him god's design for marriage is
00:03:37.680 nothing like the world's but it's healing my heart and it's healing my home i am not the wife that i
00:03:44.940 used to be and every single day i praise god for that dang okay let's see what's next okay let's
00:03:53.180 see this lady this question please do not berate me i know i've been a terrible wife don't say that
00:03:58.460 please do not confirm that like how they say don't say that it's like well she's saying it's probably
00:04:03.660 true fact for me okay well anyway 11 year relationship seven year marriage open for three
00:04:11.180 a four-year-old son. Oh, so you had a baby and we're like, fuck it. Not long after we got married, 1.00
00:04:17.160 I realized I was not satisfied. So I asked him about threesomes and he said, never.
00:04:21.580 Why do we go from unsatisfied to adding a person? But I bothered him about it.
00:04:27.440 Testing the waters. That's why. It's testing the waters.
00:04:31.120 Until they gave up and we had one with another man. You really got lucky, didn't you? That only
00:04:36.900 made our sex life worse than before shocker shocker eventually i demanded we start women it's like
00:04:43.140 how could that possibly have happened okay i'm not going to call you a bad wife he declined but
00:04:48.580 again i was able to talk him into it after only a few times of going the group told me that we
00:04:53.460 weren't welcome anymore because my hub my husband kept abruptly leaving in the middle of it and was
00:04:57.780 making them all uncomfortable it sounds like a great group we argued for a while about how
00:05:02.900 him embarrassing me i'm going to be mean to you i'm so sorry he recluse himself for a few days
00:05:08.580 yeah because this man is being pressured into do something that he doesn't want to do and his wife
00:05:12.580 the person who should be his partner and like you're supposed to be there for him and i'm your
00:05:16.660 sister coming in clutch telling you baby girl if this was vice versa i would say this is a piece
00:05:20.900 of man like this dude for pressuring you and being a and so you obviously you started
00:05:27.300 i've been a terrible wife let's just talk about you as a person character this is the person you
00:05:32.500 love like like yeah because women don't love their husbands okay oh my gosh this is so cute this is 0.99
00:05:37.540 me years ago look at how fat i was uh letting you know a lot of you are shitty wife did you know 0.99
00:05:44.340 that one in four marriages shitty wife here and i'm here to tell you why i deserve to be cheated 1.00
00:05:49.460 on in my first marriage i think she's being sarcastic his first complaint was that i did 0.96
00:05:55.380 not clean enough which i will give that to him i did not clean enough i mean i wasn't like
00:05:59.860 disgusting dirty okay we can't all be good we cannot all be good wives so some people are bad
00:06:05.460 it just you know eat that take that out it was just like clutter like i should have put things 0.93
00:06:10.020 away i know that's i think that's like we i think men just pay more attention and everything so
00:06:16.500 they're very good like if they they start a task and finish it we just don't and we leave things
00:06:22.340 everywhere along the way like that's probably my worst trait because i'm not dirty but sometimes i
00:06:27.700 just like i forget things around the house yeah i'm with you girl laundry more often things like
00:06:34.300 that mop more often even though we lived in mississippi and it rained constantly and we had
00:06:39.080 a husky who was in and out of the house and there was mud so i'd literally be mopping 24 7 if he had
00:06:44.180 his speaking of mississippi that was his other complaint that i was severely depressed and he
00:06:50.520 hated why was i depressed well let's see he was uh he moved me to the middle of nowhere away from
00:06:56.600 my friends and family and would not allow me to have a car. How fucked up of me to be sad about 0.97
00:07:02.360 that. Like he was really providing for me then. Do you think he would describe the story in the 0.99
00:07:07.040 same way? He also was mad that I would sneak by things like because I had to ask permission to
00:07:13.680 buy translation. I spent too much of his money. Anything whatsoever because he made the money
00:07:19.040 and none of it was mine. Anything I had was because of him. How dare I think I could buy
00:07:23.960 a three dollar bottle of nail polish without asking him first now i did cook dinner we really
00:07:29.600 think it was just the nail polish you really think that's what set him off every night and
00:07:35.120 i usually clean it up i was pretty much did the dishes and put it away he didn't have to do any 1.00
00:07:39.240 of that um but i wasn't willing to try new foods that he liked so that made me a shitty wife the
00:07:45.960 other reason i was a shitty wife is because i had platonic guy friends um so i guess i should 1.00
00:07:50.740 she emotionally cheated i like how she's just airing herself out i just ditched them all when 0.74
00:07:56.340 we first met you know to meet my husband's standard oh and because i was severely depressed
00:08:01.700 i like wore pjs like all the time and like never did my makeup because i was severely depressed
00:08:07.380 and had no friends and no one to talk to while he was gone 14 hours in the day when i was allowed
00:08:13.460 he was working 14 hours a day and she still found a way to make it about her isn't that incredible 1.00
00:08:18.980 have a car which was like the first year or so of our marriage i was a shitty wife because i drove 0.93
00:08:24.340 too many miles and that was very suspicious to him you know ignore the fact that i was
00:08:29.140 brand new to the state and just trying to learn the area to him that meant i was cheating and i 0.99
00:08:34.260 was a shitty ass wife he was probably cheating also a shitty ass wife because i wasn't okay 1.00
00:08:39.380 with them flirting with every waitress or any other pretty girl that was probably overly jealous 1.00
00:08:44.180 because she's fat around us fat women cannot handle an attractive man uh he had a problem with
00:08:50.100 me having a problem with that weird let's not forget about the time that he cried because his
00:08:56.580 friend's sister wasn't attracted to him you know disregard it was three days before our first
00:09:02.980 wedding anniversary how dare i demand an apology for that even though she probably has lusted over 1.00
00:09:08.980 other men in the marriage but uh she forgot her side my bad these women have never been corrected 0.88
00:09:15.380 and they just cannot like they this is a wicked woman thing he did give me credit for is i was
00:09:20.420 affectionate and i did sleep with him whenever he wanted me to the problem was i was a little 0.99
00:09:25.700 too affectionate so that made me a shitty ass wife another reason i'm a shitty wife is because 0.99
00:09:30.360 i had a big heart and that's a flaw to him because the world is cruel you're actually 1.00
00:09:34.580 perfectly explaining why you got divorced you shouldn't be an idiot let's not forget all the 0.85
00:09:39.540 translation what do you guys think that's a if any of you have translations in the comments for what 0.98
00:09:43.780 actually happened i bet she was um extending her heart uh to people that didn't deserve it uh maybe
00:09:49.140 gluck gluck 9 000 is part of her heart the times i cried and wanted to unalive myself because he 0.73
00:09:55.140 would holler and scream at me this close to my face telling me how worthless and a piece of 0.99
00:10:00.260 shit I am I should just accept his criticism it's just feedback but I think the straw that broke the 1.00
00:10:07.080 camel's back on me being a shitty wife was that the fact that we got married at 22 I told him I 0.99
00:10:13.040 wanted to wait five years and I wanted to lose weight before having children and you know the 0.94
00:10:17.860 five years passed and I never lost weight and I didn't we didn't have children so you know it was
00:10:22.860 time for me to go well that explains why you had sex with him whenever because it's like well you're 0.97
00:10:28.980 huge my girl all right let's see i was a good woman and a terrible wife at the same time uh 0.99
00:10:33.780 those are contradictory but let's see what she has she has to say and a terrible wife at the same
00:10:38.580 time nobody told me that being a good woman wasn't enough for marriage and i love my husband with
00:10:44.020 everything that i had but it still was not working i had the heart i had the intention but what i
00:10:47.940 did not have was the understanding of what it actually meant to be a good wife not just a good
00:10:52.260 woman proverbs 14 one says the wise woman builds her home but foolish one tears it down with her
00:10:57.300 own hands i wasn't tearing my house down on purpose i just didn't know how to build it right
00:11:01.060 well i just want to share with you guys three things that i struggle with as a wife versus
00:11:04.740 what i do now number one i used to speak my mind okay now i speak with purpose because not every 1.00
00:11:09.460 single thought that i have needs to leave my mouth especially to my husband is this a woman giving
00:11:14.500 good advice holy crap two i used to keep score i was a scorekeeper goal but with no shame but now 0.62
00:11:22.580 i keep coming in because marriage is not a competition you know we're working together 0.63
00:11:27.060 and it's a commitment so i'm committed to making this work i used to wait to feel like a good
00:11:31.300 wife like once my husband did whatever or acted a certain way to make me be this woman that i've
00:11:37.140 always wanted to be this wife i've always wanted to be then i would be her no now i choose to be
00:11:41.220 one i choose to be one because love is an action it is not just an emotion you know i had to stop
00:11:46.420 trying to be a good woman in my marriage and start becoming a good wife to my husband being a good
00:11:50.340 good woman that's a gift being a good wife that's practice that is a decision that you make every
00:11:55.960 single day and if you're watching this and you feel the way that i used to feel once upon a time
00:11:59.380 you are not failing i say all the time white hood is a calling and we know that anything that the
00:12:03.980 lord calls us to the enemy tries to destroy but if you follow me you should have enough conviction
00:12:07.900 to know something needs to change so go be heard bye for now that was actually decent advice from 0.93
00:12:13.800 a black woman of all people of all people never got that from them so anyways i could see why
00:12:21.280 she's married there's some humility there um anyways guys let me know what you think in the
00:12:24.920 comments if you could like the video and subscribe i love you thank you so much for watching and i'll
00:12:29.640 see you next time