Pearl - The Lie of Love： Paul Elam Exposes Modern Marriage

00:00:00.000 What up, guys? Welcome to the Audacity Network, and welcome to The Sit Down.

00:00:04.780 Today, I have a special guest on the channel. Welcome to the show, Paul Elam,

00:00:09.380 men's right activist. You've got a YouTube channel, over 100,000 subscribers.

00:00:15.140 Yes, at an ear for men on YouTube.

00:00:18.100 And how long have you been doing this?

00:00:20.680 Since 1993.

00:00:22.600 Wow.

00:00:23.700 That was the year that Warren Farrell's Myth of Male Power came up,

00:00:27.840 and reading that sort of turned my life around, and I've been doing this ever since.

00:00:33.060 And was there like a moment that red-pilled you?

00:00:35.980 Like, how did you get into the space?

00:00:38.280 Well, the book played a role in red-pilling me, but what happened after that,

00:00:43.380 I worked in a residential treatment facility, and I came into work after reading that book,

00:00:49.580 and one of our staff meetings, I asked everybody why we were assessing every woman

00:00:54.140 that came into our facility for whether or not she'd been a victim of domestic violence,

00:00:58.920 and we were assessing all the men who came into our facility for whether or not they'd been

00:01:04.200 perpetrators of domestic violence, and we weren't asking women whether they were perpetrators

00:01:09.920 or men whether they were victims.

00:01:12.600 Wait, what type of facility was it?

00:01:14.560 Substance abuse treatment.

00:01:16.200 Oh, and so they would automatically ask the women if they were victims,

00:01:20.940 and ask the men if they were perpetrators.

00:01:22.380 Is that because of the Duluth model, right?

00:01:24.320 That was the Duluth model, and it also goes back to just sugar and spice narrative about women, 0.67

00:01:31.040 and men are bad, women are good narrative that's been around at least as long as Duluth or longer. 0.99

00:01:39.960 But when I asked about it, I got hostility.

00:01:42.980 I mean, there was outrage among my peers for even asking the question,

00:01:49.100 and my first thought was, I think I'm over some kind of target here.

00:01:53.280 I don't know what it is yet, but I'm going to find out, and I've been finding out ever since.

00:01:58.040 And so did you end up, like, leaving the facility, or how did that play out?

00:02:02.200 I ended up leaving the field and doing my own thing.

00:02:05.600 I just couldn't take it anymore, because there was a lot more problems than that,

00:02:10.400 and some problems, not even gender-related.

00:02:12.920 The recidivism rates in chemical dependency treatment are abysmal, and lots of other reasons to leave.

00:02:19.740 But my interest in men's issues took me into counseling men, and that's what I've been doing.

00:02:25.140 And what would you say are the common problems that men come to you with?

00:02:28.420 Um, they've been screwed over by women, for the most part. 1.00

00:02:34.120 I mean, I'm not casting dispersions here, but of the men I talk to, 98% of them,

00:02:41.960 whatever life circumstances they're dealing with at the time,

00:02:45.660 go back to decisions that they've made regarding women, getting married to the wrong women,

00:02:50.580 getting the wrong woman pregnant, getting in a relationship with somebody who'll make false allegations,

00:02:55.560 all these things, and not screening women, it goes back to that.

00:03:01.400 But their drinking, their drugging, their depression, their suicidal ideation,

00:03:05.740 all kinds of life problems, when we talk long enough,

00:03:09.440 we get back to the women in their lives, and what they were expecting.

00:03:13.260 Guys think, I'm going to meet a girl and fall in love, and she's going to love me back,

00:03:16.960 and we're going to go off happily ever after into the sunset,

00:03:20.280 and then they find out that it doesn't really work that way.

00:03:23.640 And it's devastating for them.

00:03:25.560 And you found that even people that are, men that are struggling with substance abuse,

00:03:30.360 it's mostly women too. 1.00

00:03:32.300 Well, absolutely.

00:03:33.740 I mean, a lot of guys drink over bad marriages.

00:03:36.800 Right. 0.98

00:03:37.420 They're miserable. 0.72

00:03:38.420 They don't know what to do. 0.97

00:03:39.700 They have children.

00:03:40.600 If they get a divorce, they're worried about, sometimes the wife is abusive, 1.00

00:03:45.460 and the man won't leave because they don't want to leave the children with an abusive mother,

00:03:50.600 and they already know the courts are going to give her custody. 0.97

00:03:53.060 So they stay, and they drink, or they drug, or they engage in other risky behaviors,

00:03:58.880 or they have affairs.

00:04:00.240 Eventually, they blow up and slap her or something like that.

00:04:03.380 And then that sets problems into motions.

00:04:07.020 And do you think this starts for men from childhood?

00:04:11.080 Like, where do you think this comes from?

00:04:12.640 This, you know, because we were talking about it earlier,

00:04:15.820 they're just simping, like they just want to appease women all of the time. 0.55

00:04:21.260 Well, look at your average family, or people from my generation grew up in homes

00:04:26.900 where it was an edict, you better make your mother happy. 0.73

00:04:30.380 Right.

00:04:30.700 If mother complains to father, you're in trouble, sometimes really abusive trouble.

00:04:35.980 So it starts in early childhood, where father's off at work, they're left with the mother at home,

00:04:44.060 they learn to please mom, they get manipulated, the child manipulates back,

00:04:49.440 pleasing the mom, anything to make her smile.

00:04:51.820 And that sets a behavioral pattern that they take into relationships.

00:04:55.420 They go into their first year of school, it's all women, they have to please the teachers. 1.00

00:04:59.820 Their lives are shaped by women for the first 18 to 20 years, in almost all cases. 0.99

00:05:07.020 And men learn early, you've got to make her happy.

00:05:11.240 If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.

00:05:14.500 We didn't coin that by accident.

00:05:17.100 It's true.

00:05:18.380 So when you're conditioned to please women, that's where your mindset is at.

00:05:24.560 It carries into your relationships, and it ends up making men very miserable.

00:05:29.820 So what, we've talked about it before, but just for the audience, what is gynocentrism?

00:05:35.880 Good question.

00:05:37.360 It's, on paper, gynocentrism is just a system of beliefs and attitudes and rules

00:05:43.460 that focus on the well-being of women over the well-being of men.

00:05:49.200 Our attention and energy is focused on making women happy, keeping them safe, giving them what they want.

00:05:56.460 It goes back, oh gosh, at least 1,000 years to the advent of romantic chivalry, which is a big part of modern gynocentrism.

00:06:08.820 You know, gynocentrism itself, historically, wasn't such a bad thing.

00:06:12.980 If women weren't alive to have children, we would have been in trouble. 1.00

00:06:18.180 And they had to be able to protect children and nurture them and get them to where they were self-sufficient.

00:06:23.840 So a certain amount of gynocentrism was absolutely an imperative for the human species. 0.99

00:06:30.660 But once romantic chivalry hit the mainstream throughout Europe and then eventually in the West,

00:06:37.400 it was more than keeping women alive.

00:06:39.740 It was about keeping that smile on their face all the time.

00:06:45.000 And if we fail, then there's a problem.

00:06:48.380 And that's what led to a lot of simping.

00:06:51.340 Well, that's, because that's kind of a new concept to me. 0.99

00:06:54.740 You guys think that romantic shit, like romantic love. 0.99

00:06:59.080 And I have, I'm a little bit undecided on it. 0.99

00:07:02.020 Okay.

00:07:02.220 So I want you to convince me, like, why is romantic love such a bad thing?

00:07:07.380 Because it puts unrealistic expectations on a relationship.

00:07:12.620 Romance is about whining and dining.

00:07:14.800 It's about, and let's be honest, romance is about making women happy.

00:07:20.300 There's nothing in the romantic model that says a man has to be happy at all.

00:07:24.520 Yeah.

00:07:24.980 The romantic model says a man has to produce. 0.97

00:07:27.800 He has to produce jewels.

00:07:29.080 He has to produce nice things.

00:07:31.400 Right.

00:07:31.740 There's no, like, does she cook him dinner?

00:07:34.700 It's always, yeah.

00:07:35.860 Well, there's some of that.

00:07:37.540 But it's always sort of like, you know, a millionaire gets a wife who takes a part-time job in a dress shop.

00:07:44.820 And she says, here's my $200 to contribute to the $10 million you have in the bank.

00:07:50.460 But back to the romantic thing, look at the model of how proposals go in the West.

00:07:58.560 Everybody has that image of their mind of a man down on his knee, bearing a gift, jewelry that's supposed to represent three months of his salary.

00:08:07.740 It's all set up.

00:08:08.920 It's all arranged in advance.

00:08:10.620 That's romance. 0.79

00:08:12.340 Romance is laying rose petals at her feet. 0.98

00:08:14.820 Romance is talking to her.

00:08:17.040 It's worshiping women. 0.98

00:08:17.620 It is a worship thing.

00:08:19.520 Now, gee, what could go wrong there long term?

00:08:23.460 If you start a relationship with that kind of unrealistic expectation, the only thing that matters is elevating her.

00:08:29.860 The only thing that matters is her happiness.

00:08:31.460 And that's why you get these women saying they fell out of love. 1.00

00:08:33.880 Absolutely.

00:08:34.360 Because they came in with the expectation of romantic love.

00:08:37.740 And women aren't particularly romantic. 1.00

00:08:43.560 There's another little flaw in that system, too.

00:08:46.460 Men are.

00:08:47.340 Men are the romantic ones.

00:08:49.480 I work with couples.

00:08:50.780 I work with men post-divorce.

00:08:53.080 It's always the men that are devastated by the broken heart.

00:08:58.220 I mean, I see it affects women, too, no doubt.

00:09:00.980 But for most guys that I work with, by the time the divorce rolls around, she's doing well.

00:09:08.240 Got a new boyfriend.

00:09:09.840 Right.

00:09:10.480 Probably had one before they ever broke up.

00:09:13.140 Yeah.

00:09:13.760 She monkey-branched right out of it. 1.00

00:09:15.920 And women tend to do their grieving while they're in the relationship. 1.00

00:09:19.520 And then they're done.

00:09:20.780 And then a guy is like, oh, it's over now.

00:09:23.840 Then he starts grieving.

00:09:25.160 And you know what's crazy? 1.00

00:09:25.840 Men will still talk highly about a wife that absolutely fucked them. 1.00

00:09:29.920 Excuse my language. 0.99

00:09:31.740 But a guy will have been taken through the ringer of divorce court alimony, and they'll 0.73

00:09:37.600 still find something positive to say about her.

00:09:40.320 Where women could have a good guy, and they'll absolutely trash him. 1.00

00:09:44.300 It's a lot worse than that, in my experience.

00:09:47.520 I worked with a guy once that had been divorced for eight years.

00:09:51.400 And he was still acting like a puppy, trying to be let in into his ex-wife's life.

00:09:56.700 And I've seen that happen over and over and over again.

00:10:01.380 It's almost like they can't divorce. 0.84

00:10:04.900 Guys that she'll have sex with one of his friends and then call him a week later and 1.00

00:10:10.020 say, I need you to help me move. 0.87

00:10:11.900 And he'll show up to lift boxes and furniture.

00:10:17.120 Men do this all the time.

00:10:18.760 It's why I don't really have.

00:10:20.460 I probably should.

00:10:21.740 I get criticized for it.

00:10:22.900 I don't have a lot of sympathy for men in these situations.

00:10:25.820 They make horrible decisions based on crazy ideas.

00:10:30.760 Anybody should be able to look at that image of a guy down on his knees bearing a diamond

00:10:35.000 saying, this is how I want our life to be, as totally unsustainable.

00:10:40.100 Right.

00:10:41.420 But it doesn't even enter our minds.

00:10:43.380 We're just like, oh no, she's smiling.

00:10:44.980 Because it's been programmed into us for like a thousand years.

00:10:48.260 Exactly.

00:10:49.600 And it is not a natural arrangement between men and women.

00:10:54.040 Like I said, gynocentrism, a certain amount of it, is natural. 0.96

00:10:58.860 And it's easy to understand how we got there.

00:11:01.320 Yeah.

00:11:01.760 But this romantic notion, matrimony, you know, they don't call it patrimony.

00:11:07.700 Marriage, matrimony, used to signify a time when a woman put aside being a child and became 0.99

00:11:14.920 an adult responsible for a family.

00:11:16.980 She had to produce.

00:11:18.940 She had to do all kinds of things.

00:11:20.600 She had to take care of children. 0.86

00:11:22.380 She had real responsibilities and real work.

00:11:25.940 And then when we brought romance into it, the object became, oh, you don't have to work. 0.96

00:11:30.760 We just put a cushion under your butt and you can enjoy life that way. 0.95

00:11:35.320 Yeah. 0.94

00:11:35.500 Well, that's the, because that's what I would always hear is that we didn't have to work

00:11:39.060 back in the day, but we used to live on farms.

00:11:41.580 And so I'm like, life was a billion times harder if you were a stay-at-home wife a hundred

00:11:46.340 years ago. 0.97

00:11:47.240 And you know, I hear most of that crap from men who think somehow that there was this magical 0.99

00:11:53.740 patriarchy in the past where women didn't work. 1.00

00:11:58.100 Women worked brutally hard and had shorter lives because of it for thousands of years until we 1.00

00:12:06.740 developed the technology to rescue them from that.

00:12:09.880 And we've applied it all in just such an insane way.

00:12:13.880 I mean, sorry, look at the state of women right now. 1.00

00:12:17.080 How many, what percentage of women are even marriageable right now? 1.00

00:12:20.680 3% statistically, if you want no tattoos, no debt and under the age of 35, I think.

00:12:27.480 Yes.

00:12:28.060 And, and there's, there's a couple more they added into it, but it was like in the book

00:12:31.960 of numbers, like not overweight, no other kids.

00:12:35.420 3%.

00:12:36.020 Yeah.

00:12:36.580 Yeah.

00:12:36.780 And so it becomes a man's job. 1.00

00:12:38.940 And here's the problem. 1.00

00:12:40.200 The man just has to man up and marry these whores. 1.00

00:12:41.680 Yes, of course they do. 1.00

00:12:43.140 That's the right thing to do.

00:12:44.480 And that's what they've been doing, which is why, you know, half of the marriages are failing

00:12:47.680 and then 70% of second marriages are failing.

00:12:51.200 It's a failure of men in my book.

00:12:55.660 They want to practice these unrealistic expectations.

00:13:00.340 And I think they've got a sort of shame-based thing going on here.

00:13:06.060 If we don't make women happy, we're not men.

00:13:08.920 That's also tied into this.

00:13:11.360 Wow.

00:13:11.720 That's really true.

00:13:12.800 I didn't think about that until you said it, but that's really true.

00:13:15.900 It is.

00:13:16.420 If we don't, because that was even during the Michael Knowles debate, that's what he said.

00:13:20.800 I said, well, if she gets the wrong group of friends, she can leave if she does this. 1.00

00:13:25.160 And then he's like, oh, well, you got to watch the friends.

00:13:28.060 You got to watch the leadership.

00:13:29.640 And so it's like putting all accountability for a marriage failing on the man.

00:13:34.300 Absolutely.

00:13:35.040 When sometimes like a chick just, she just wants to go. 1.00

00:13:38.480 He can't do anything.

00:13:40.300 And most of the time, I mean, monogamy is a hard thing to maintain for both sexes. 1.00

00:13:46.540 It's tough.

00:13:48.640 Women have easy outs. 1.00

00:13:49.840 And if men don't make her happy, the first thing she's going to do is attack his masculinity. 1.00

00:13:57.340 When she goes out and bad mouths him, it'll be all things that undermine his status as a masculine man.

00:14:05.180 He doesn't work hard enough.

00:14:06.680 He doesn't pay enough attention to me.

00:14:08.320 He doesn't do this.

00:14:09.740 He's always doing that.

00:14:11.020 But these are things that shame men.

00:14:14.780 And we buy into it instead of, you know, treating her like a guy, which is what I recommend.

00:14:23.680 Okay.

00:14:25.420 Explain that a little more.

00:14:26.620 Treat her like a guy.

00:14:27.420 Same standards.

00:14:30.040 Yeah. 1.00

00:14:30.420 Guys will take shit from women that they would punch a man in the mouth for. 1.00

00:14:37.360 Right. 1.00

00:14:38.260 Constantly.

00:14:38.980 They do that. 0.99

00:14:40.280 And I'm not, no, for if somebody says Paul Edelman's recommending punching women in the mouth. 0.80

00:14:45.180 I'm not recommending any such thing, but just the capacity to hear a crazy unrealistic expectation.

00:14:53.580 Like I want a three carat emerald cut VS1 diamond for an engagement ring. 0.99

00:15:01.620 Guys don't have the ability or they should have the ability to say, well, fuck out of here. 1.00

00:15:07.120 Go buy one. 1.00

00:15:08.180 I did a show and a girl wanted a $200,000 engagement ring for an overweight, like 33-year-old woman. 1.00

00:15:16.980 And I'm like, I mean, at least be like 22, you know, and high if you're going to ask for that.

00:15:25.120 You know what I mean?

00:15:25.760 Like, at least you got to be a seven or a higher at least.

00:15:29.720 I've got a better idea.

00:15:31.060 No ring.

00:15:32.540 Ooh.

00:15:33.440 Yeah.

00:15:34.040 No nothing.

00:15:34.780 Yeah.

00:15:35.080 We are in an age where I think it's okay for men to start telling women, you're responsible for your own happiness. 0.90

00:15:44.160 If you need a piece of carbon mined by slave labor, a 12-year-old in Africa to feel good about yourself, go buy one. 1.00

00:15:53.140 Right.

00:15:54.340 Women can work. 1.00

00:15:55.740 They can produce.

00:15:57.240 Guys won't do that because it makes them feel unmasculine.

00:16:00.560 Right.

00:16:01.580 And so it's a trap.

00:16:02.840 Nobody's going to survive.

00:16:05.780 And love is, you know, love is a funny thing.

00:16:08.760 The romance stuff and infatuation, none of that is love.

00:16:11.880 It never was love.

00:16:13.220 Love comes 15, 20, 25 years into a relationship with somebody.

00:16:18.120 And how do you get to that point where there's real intimacy and real love if one person's fawning over the other all the time?

00:16:27.020 All it does is build resentment and entitlement.

00:16:31.420 So you got some pushback during our, we did a panel a couple of weeks or months ago maybe with some traditional conservatives on it.

00:16:43.680 Yeah, Tim and Andrew.

00:16:44.560 Yeah, and they were, I think Tim offered some pushback because you said you didn't have a problem with women working. 1.00

00:16:53.180 I have a problem with women not working. 1.00

00:16:56.040 Okay.

00:16:56.900 Tell me why.

00:16:57.880 Get a, yeah, why should women have to work? 1.00

00:17:03.280 Well, because I think their argument would be that they should raise the children and that's what's best for the kids.

00:17:08.380 Well, you know something, that's work too.

00:17:10.740 I mean, if they're actually going to raise children and they're going to take care of a home and manage a home, I respect that.

00:17:17.560 I don't have a problem with it, but I didn't need that from somebody.

00:17:23.640 So why should I settle for somebody that can't carry their weight financially?

00:17:28.220 Right.

00:17:28.500 And the thing is, I had to make that decision first before I was ever in a position to look at this and say, I'm never going to be with a deadbeat woman again. 0.99

00:17:38.800 She could better show up with her purse and having a job or some sort of income or we're not going to even get started here. 1.00

00:17:46.320 I had to make that decision before it ever happened.

00:17:48.680 And I'm happy to say I'm 22 years into a relationship I wouldn't trade for the world, but it wasn't because I got on my knees in front of her or threw flowers at her or told her how beautiful she was every five minutes.

00:18:04.160 I don't need that.

00:18:05.820 And I don't think anybody does.

00:18:08.280 I think all this stuff is, it's infantilizing when you treat women that way.

00:18:13.460 You treat them like they can't accomplish anything, like they can't buy anything, they can't do anything.

00:18:19.680 I, with all respect to Tim and Andrew, I think these are products of very emotionally insecure men that need a child to take care of, not a partner in life.

00:18:35.260 I don't want a child to take care of.

00:18:37.160 And sorry to say, you look at the population of women out there, average emotional intelligence is about 14 years old, no matter how old they are in real life. 1.00

00:18:48.440 On a good day.

00:18:50.000 Well, yeah, actually, I tweeted that, but I didn't think women matured past like 17 at best. 0.58

00:18:56.120 That's pretty good.

00:18:58.080 I think like the best are like 17, 18.

00:19:01.400 I've been with a couple that were like four or five.

00:19:03.780 Well, I don't see a problem with women working, especially when you consider that women, and that's what they'll say. 1.00

00:19:11.240 They'll say, Pearl's a feminist. 1.00

00:19:12.860 And I'm like, well, it doesn't change the world I'm in.

00:19:16.220 Like a feminism one. 1.00

00:19:17.380 I don't know what you guys want me to do.

00:19:18.960 I can't change it.

00:19:20.060 But what I meant by that, though, is if the kid's in public school, why can't she get a job?

00:19:26.080 The kid's gone.

00:19:27.660 I think, what's public school, seven hours a day, six?

00:19:30.240 Yep.

00:19:30.820 And then when I was a kid, everyone did after school activities.

00:19:34.460 So you would stay.

00:19:36.060 We had practice at, I don't know, 3, 3.30.

00:19:38.660 Right.

00:19:39.740 You were there until 5 or 6.

00:19:41.520 You came home at 7.

00:19:43.820 But Oprah comes on it, too.

00:19:46.860 But I'm like, what are you doing all day?

00:19:49.040 It's not like we have air fryers now.

00:19:50.980 You can make like a perfectly good meal in an air fryer in 45 minutes.

00:19:55.380 And it's like, it's not bad food either.

00:19:57.260 It can be healthy and good for you.

00:19:59.200 So what are you guys doing all day?

00:20:01.040 Well, and a lot of guys are finding now they don't want women to cook for them. 0.88

00:20:04.180 They're fine cooking for themselves or cooking for others.

00:20:07.720 I'm the cook in my home.

00:20:08.980 I wouldn't have it any other way.

00:20:10.820 Yeah.

00:20:11.960 Yeah, I was actually, I said that on a podcast recently, that men are better cooks than women now. 0.97

00:20:18.040 Well, you look at it.

00:20:19.700 Some people will say it's misogyny and women's oppression. 1.00

00:20:22.520 But you look at all the, you know, outrageously successful chefs in the world.

00:20:28.520 They're all men. 0.99

00:20:29.300 Yeah.

00:20:30.860 But then I'm like evil, you know.

00:20:32.900 What?

00:20:34.180 That's why I'm here.

00:20:37.100 What pushback have you gotten the last couple of, or the last 20 years?

00:20:42.720 Oh, God.

00:20:43.520 I can't even, I've lost count of the hit pieces in the media.

00:20:47.340 I mean, most of them started back in 14, 10 years ago when we did our first international

00:20:53.640 conference on men's issues in Detroit.

00:20:56.160 It wasn't too long after that that the SPLC decided we're a hate group, that a voice for

00:21:02.920 men was.

00:21:03.420 So they eventually, they listed us as a hate group.

00:21:07.060 It was really interesting.

00:21:07.880 And I turned over a voice for men to Robert Brockway, a guy out of Australia, a great men's rights

00:21:13.120 activist there that is doing a bang up job running it now.

00:21:16.640 And I just handed it over to him and started XY crew, which is a men's groups that we're doing

00:21:23.720 online and we do real world events.

00:21:25.700 And the SPLC said, okay, a voice for men's not a hate group anymore, but XY crew is, simply 0.90

00:21:33.880 because it changed ownership.

00:21:35.560 I've had that pushback.

00:21:37.000 I've had, I've had death threats.

00:21:39.680 I've had people write me emails.

00:21:41.760 Oh my God, a woman wrote me once and I don't know if it was true or not.

00:21:45.420 She said, my husband listened to you and he blew his brains out. 0.99

00:21:49.740 Thanks for killing my husband. 0.97

00:21:53.260 I get stuff like that fairly regularly.

00:21:57.040 So what keeps you going?

00:21:58.580 Like, why do you keep doing it?

00:22:00.300 You get, you know, cause you could just-

00:22:01.760 Maybe I'm nuts.

00:22:02.700 I don't know.

00:22:03.100 That's part of the problem that I don't know when to quit.

00:22:08.580 I think what keeps me going is that I was just never a guy that liked injustice.

00:22:15.180 Yeah.

00:22:15.720 And what I see happening in family courts now, this is why I get so frustrated with

00:22:20.340 these guys that are out there just saying, marry the hoe. 0.99

00:22:23.080 I'm like, are you crazy? 0.51

00:22:24.960 You saw my trot horn. 0.56

00:22:25.900 Yeah.

00:22:28.000 Marry the hoe. 1.00

00:22:28.960 So, you know, just no matter what she does, go back and redouble your efforts and take

00:22:34.820 care of her and be kind to her and give her everything she wants or you're not a man.

00:22:39.560 This is the underlying theme behind all of you.

00:22:41.640 Yeah, you're not a real man if you don't marry.

00:22:43.080 You're not, if you don't marry and if she's not happy.

00:22:46.820 You don't continue your bloodline.

00:22:48.380 And then these guys, we get them in family courts and the family courts are just, they're

00:22:55.560 the biggest rollback of civil rights since Jim Crow in this country.

00:22:59.700 The way they just step on families, destroy them.

00:23:03.600 They have an opportunity in family courts, if they were doing their job, to help a family

00:23:09.720 restructure post-divorce, to keep the relationships intact with the children and both parents and

00:23:15.380 and to make rulings according to what is really in the best interest of the child.

00:23:20.140 They don't do that at all.

00:23:21.240 They destroy children in family courts and they destroy the fathers and ultimately the 0.70

00:23:25.820 mothers by selling them a bill of goods. 1.00

00:23:28.400 Women end up much more likely to be below the poverty line post-divorce than they are while

00:23:33.960 they're married.

00:23:35.020 Their lives deteriorate.

00:23:36.620 The children's lives go downhill.

00:23:38.720 Men's lives deteriorate. 1.00

00:23:40.220 And we find that normally there's a four to one ratio of suicide between men and women.

00:23:46.140 When you're talking about divorce and breakup of long-term relationship, it goes to 11 to

00:23:51.400 one.

00:23:52.340 That's how bad things are out there.

00:23:54.640 And that bothers me.

00:23:56.860 Well, and that's the thing.

00:23:58.340 They just, there's never any push for reform before men get married.

00:24:03.820 It's always just man up and take the risk anyway.

00:24:06.960 And the risk is worth the reward, but none of these guys have seen the other side of

00:24:12.840 divorce and what happens to these men.

00:24:16.660 What are some of the worst horror stories that you have witnessed over the years?

00:24:22.160 The suicides.

00:24:25.260 There's, I have talked to several men that ultimately killed themselves because of family

00:24:30.760 court issues.

00:24:33.520 Other things, I mean, children getting kidnapped, taken overseas, men chasing them, trying to

00:24:40.320 find their children.

00:24:42.280 Just the depression that goes with that and the fact that the system does not care.

00:24:47.740 The people that create this won't do anything about it.

00:24:52.640 Almost every divorce is a nightmare story.

00:24:56.320 Guys get financially eviscerated.

00:24:58.980 They're often, the cases in family courts are based on false accusations.

00:25:03.580 The first thing family law attorneys do, particularly with women, is saying, I think he hit you, 1.00

00:25:09.140 didn't he?

00:25:10.940 And until they get that, yes.

00:25:12.600 And then once that goes out, the police will investigate.

00:25:16.120 Most of the time they find there hadn't been an assault here.

00:25:18.540 There's no charges.

00:25:19.820 But by that time, the court has the accusation.

00:25:22.640 And they issue ex parte restraining orders and everything else just based on the accusation.

00:25:27.500 No proof whatsoever.

00:25:29.660 It is amazing what they do. 0.98

00:25:31.920 They pluck guys from their home, throw them in jail, treat them like garbage, tell them 0.94

00:25:37.740 they can't come within 200 yards of their own children. 0.85

00:25:41.160 And with nothing, no proof of anything.

00:25:44.560 Is that why the lawyers pander?

00:25:47.440 Oh, that just made a lot of...

00:25:48.400 Because sometimes I'll talk to lawyers and I just feel like they're lying.

00:25:52.740 And I don't know why, but I just, like, there's one that replied to me recently when I said

00:25:59.920 men, like, in general are better parents.

00:26:02.140 And he was like, well, no, you don't always know that.

00:26:05.100 And I was just like, yeah, but you can look at abuse stats and you can come to a conclusion.

00:26:10.040 I'm not saying it's 100%.

00:26:11.520 Some men are terrible dads.

00:26:13.160 Sure. 0.90

00:26:13.620 Some women. 1.00

00:26:14.360 But I always find it odd when someone's arguing with me about a fact, you know?

00:26:21.180 And it just, the way they react to that is just very strange, I guess.

00:26:26.300 Well, you always have to remember that between the judge and the two attorneys that are involved

00:26:30.480 in any divorce, these people play golf together.

00:26:33.920 Oh.

00:26:35.240 So they, if they, if everyone knew how bad family court was, they would look bad too,

00:26:41.000 because they've been facilitating this stuff.

00:26:43.620 Absolutely.

00:26:44.440 And the lawyers are in on it too.

00:26:46.000 So you can't even really trust what they're saying.

00:26:49.700 I mean, sometimes maybe you can, but I'm just thinking.

00:26:52.700 It's rare.

00:26:53.720 Yeah, because they're the ones telling the women to accuse the men of abuse.

00:26:58.900 And what's the first thing, one of the first things that family law attorneys do

00:27:02.360 when they get a new client, I need to see all your assets.

00:27:07.040 We want to see what you're worth.

00:27:09.200 And they calculate how much of that stuff they can get before the divorce is over.

00:27:16.460 So if I, let's just say someone's worth $100,000, how would that?

00:27:20.900 They will take the case, bleed that money down.

00:27:27.580 And when the money is out, they'll say, okay, we've got a settlement now.

00:27:31.720 Oh.

00:27:32.500 Between the two.

00:27:33.460 Oh.

00:27:34.240 So they're trying to get the people's net worth to zero, basically.

00:27:39.120 Take all the money they can and then make a settlement.

00:27:43.180 And since it's usually the guy's money, because more often than not, oh, that's why they're lying.

00:27:52.280 This is all a scam.

00:27:54.400 Oh.

00:27:54.800 All of it.

00:27:55.880 That makes sense.

00:27:56.600 I could not figure out why he was lying.

00:27:59.540 I don't know how to describe it.

00:28:01.460 It's just like a feeling, I guess.

00:28:02.880 But I'm like, they're hiding something.

00:28:04.740 The way they're answering and responding to these facts is not honest.

00:28:09.860 And I notice it from the trad cons a lot, but their ego investments, their religion.

00:28:15.800 So that's why they do it, I think, anyways.

00:28:19.200 They love their religion, but because they look bad if people knew what they did behind closed doors.

00:28:26.660 Absolutely.

00:28:27.240 That's my belief.

00:28:28.180 And this is, you know, I couldn't prove this in a study, but I can tell you over and over again, the men I've counseled, they suddenly came to some kind of arrangement precisely when the money was running out.

00:28:42.360 Wow.

00:28:43.740 I don't think that's a coincidence.

00:28:45.720 I think that family law attorneys are like ambulance chasers. 0.89

00:28:50.320 What are ambulance? 0.98

00:28:51.560 Sorry, I don't care.

00:28:52.140 Sorry.

00:28:52.580 Personal injury attorneys that, you know, hang out in hospital ERs and find clients who have been in automobile wrecks.

00:29:02.000 And here I can make you some money.

00:29:03.460 And those guys.

00:29:04.060 Just kind of a scummy profession.

00:29:05.880 Family court.

00:29:06.500 Because.

00:29:07.440 Family courts are scummy. 0.50

00:29:08.720 They're horrible places. 0.74

00:29:09.480 Yeah.

00:29:09.820 But I'm even thinking family law.

00:29:12.220 Because unless you're like a men's, maybe a men's rights attorney, that sort of thing.

00:29:16.660 It's like odds are you have to screw over men to get paid.

00:29:20.580 And you don't want a men's rights attorney or anybody identifying that.

00:29:26.220 Here's the problem.

00:29:27.800 The courts hate that.

00:29:30.300 When attorneys come in and act like their male clients actually have rights.

00:29:35.340 And there's a constitution and they shouldn't be treated this way.

00:29:40.340 Courts don't want any of that. 1.00

00:29:42.120 They want compliance.

00:29:43.220 I can't tell you how many guys were asking their attorneys, why aren't you saying this?

00:29:49.280 Why aren't you doing that?

00:29:50.300 You know.

00:29:50.720 I've heard that in the UK, too, where they said their attorneys don't even tell them the right thing to do.

00:29:55.700 Yeah.

00:29:56.040 They don't.

00:29:56.720 Yeah.

00:29:57.080 And it's like, why aren't we fighting this this way or that way?

00:30:00.620 Oh, don't worry about it.

00:30:02.280 This is the way it's done.

00:30:04.220 That sort of thing.

00:30:05.140 And, of course, it bleeds the family dry of money.

00:30:08.800 And then once that's done, it's like, okay, we're done now.

00:30:12.720 Oh, that makes sense.

00:30:14.480 I could not figure out why.

00:30:16.680 And the judges have to be in on it, too.

00:30:19.120 So do you think it's just gynocentrism that makes them do this or the love of money?

00:30:24.140 I think gynocentrism helps.

00:30:25.920 But, I mean, they're attorneys.

00:30:27.420 It's the money.

00:30:28.260 Yeah.

00:30:28.740 Yeah.

00:30:28.960 Okay.

00:30:29.200 Because sometimes I wonder if, I don't know, because there was a switch that clicked for me when I was interviewing men and women.

00:30:38.880 And women would always say they were abused, right? 0.98

00:30:41.660 And someone in my comments section said, ask if they filed a police report.

00:30:46.520 And I couldn't believe none of them did.

00:30:48.920 Of course they did.

00:30:49.800 Yeah. 1.00

00:30:50.100 And that was when I was like, oh, these bitches are lying. 1.00

00:30:53.140 None of them are telling the truth. 0.99

00:30:54.380 Because then I would, you know, it's like you ask one question because your natural reaction when someone says they're abused, I think it's like an empathetic, for me anyway, was why would you lie about that?

00:31:04.200 I would just believe them.

00:31:05.460 But then I would ask like two or three questions.

00:31:07.620 Like one chick said that she was thrown down a flight of stairs by her ex-boyfriend, right?

00:31:12.820 That sounds pretty bad, right?

00:31:14.000 That's pretty rough.

00:31:14.880 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:31:15.860 And then I asked, I was like, okay, what led up?

00:31:18.360 And someone in my comments section was like, ask her what led up to the fight.

00:31:21.720 And so she's like, oh, I wouldn't leave his house.

00:31:25.580 So what I think happened based on the way she answered was she wouldn't leave his house.

00:31:31.200 She was making a scene with his kid there and he was pushing her to get out and she fell down the flight of stairs because she wouldn't leave. 0.98

00:31:38.680 Yep.

00:31:39.540 Not surprising at all.

00:31:41.100 Yeah.

00:31:41.720 And so, and I talked to other guys and they're like, oh, my ex-girlfriend refused to, like they've all have a very similar, maybe there wasn't a police involved,

00:31:49.360 but you could ask guys and they'll say, oh yeah, women do that all the time. 1.00

00:31:53.080 They refuse to leave.

00:31:54.260 They'll make a scene.

00:31:55.400 Another part of that scenario is guys that are in relationships with women that are psychologically and emotionally very abusive,

00:32:02.120 which like borderline personalities are, they can be horrendously abusive people.

00:32:06.440 A guy will take that abuse for years and then one day he can't take it anymore and he slaps her. 0.98

00:32:11.740 That's all the world will ever see is the moment he slapped her.

00:32:15.740 They won't pay any attention to anything that led up to it.

00:32:18.780 Nothing else matters.

00:32:19.840 He hit a woman. 0.97

00:32:22.540 Time to go to jail and take all your stuff.

00:32:25.740 And the guy says, yeah, I did it.

00:32:28.440 And nobody cares that he'd been provoked for years and abused for years.

00:32:33.880 Or they'll hit first.

00:32:35.400 Yep.

00:32:35.560 And then then one day they get slapped back.

00:32:38.000 Yep.

00:32:39.260 Yep.

00:32:40.120 And the police will arrest the guy in that every time.

00:32:43.580 Yeah.

00:32:44.380 Well, so I guess my question is in family court.

00:32:50.260 Do you think they know that the women are lying? 0.97

00:32:53.660 They don't care.

00:32:54.440 Oh, they don't care.

00:32:55.380 They know the whole thing is corrupt.

00:32:58.720 Steve Baskerville wrote about this very well.

00:33:01.680 They know precisely what they're doing in there.

00:33:04.460 They know exactly what's going on.

00:33:06.400 They know the family's being fleeced for all the money.

00:33:09.120 They know the children are being destroyed.

00:33:11.300 They know that.

00:33:11.980 And they just don't care.

00:33:12.980 They don't care.

00:33:14.040 Because they're making money.

00:33:15.500 This is their routine.

00:33:17.360 This is what they do.

00:33:19.140 And, you know, family courts that I know of don't have cameras in them.

00:33:23.460 There's no real appeals process for family courts.

00:33:26.220 You just, whatever the judge rules, that's it.

00:33:28.520 So they have impunity.

00:33:29.840 And they can do anything they want.

00:33:31.440 And they do.

00:33:32.380 Right.

00:33:32.820 The only thing that's going to save family courts in this country is bulldozers. 1.00

00:33:40.460 Mow them down and rebuild.

00:33:43.440 It's the only thing that will ever save them. 0.99

00:33:45.900 It's just too corrupt.

00:33:47.280 Do you think that's possible?

00:33:52.240 Not really.

00:33:53.440 Yeah, I don't either.

00:33:55.100 No.

00:33:55.520 I wish it was.

00:33:56.380 I wish they could record it and make it public.

00:34:00.720 I think that would help.

00:34:02.500 It would help a lot.

00:34:03.960 Because I think when you put the light on something unjust, then people start to speak out.

00:34:08.460 And they actually, that's why sometimes these trad cons, I'll do debates with them.

00:34:12.440 And I'm just like, why don't you come with me and go tell the men that served their country

00:34:18.760 and got divorced, raped, got their children taken, that they're not a real man. 0.96

00:34:23.060 Go tell them. 1.00

00:34:24.640 Go ahead.

00:34:25.820 That it's their fault their marriage ended.

00:34:28.120 Well, it won't be anything they haven't heard a thousand times already.

00:34:31.360 Yeah.

00:34:31.840 The world is so gynocentric. 1.00

00:34:34.420 One of the biggest problems that I have with guys going through divorce is that their own families turn on them.

00:34:40.500 Oh my gosh.

00:34:41.700 That's the, I interviewed one guy, his whole family.

00:34:44.920 Yep.

00:34:45.100 His whole family believed he was an abuser for like, they came around like five years later, but yes, she got his whole family.

00:34:51.340 A little bit late for that.

00:34:52.740 Yeah.

00:34:53.700 Yeah.

00:34:54.300 I've seen it happen a thousand times.

00:34:56.720 Guys, their own fathers, their own mothers turn on them and side with the abusive woman.

00:35:03.180 It's amazing.

00:35:04.740 That is, when you take fundamental biological gynocentrism, which arguably is a necessity, and you turn it into that,

00:35:13.700 you've got a crazy world, and I don't see what there is to stop it at this point other than, I mean,

00:35:21.500 eventually we'll probably, the society will collapse, and that'll be the start of something new and maybe a little bit better.

00:35:28.160 But until then, I don't see anything changing.

00:35:30.320 It's too profitable, and it's too easy for people.

00:35:32.720 If people can turn on their own children because a woman said, he hit me or he was mean to me, man, we're a long way from being able to fix anything.

00:35:44.860 And they never ask.

00:35:45.960 Even the Michael Knowles interview, he didn't ask her any freaking, I'm like, guys, you don't ask any questions.

00:35:53.840 I think Michael is challenged.

00:35:56.500 I'm sorry.

00:35:58.000 You think he's like mentally challenged?

00:36:00.660 He's like a smart guy, you know. 1.00

00:36:02.760 Well, you know, simps are some of the smartest people you'll meet, some of the dumbest people. 0.96

00:36:07.340 It's not about intelligence or culture or race or ethnicity or religion or anything. 0.98

00:36:13.180 Simping runs through the veins of Western men, period. 0.98

00:36:19.500 And then you get people like Knowles who'll be like, yeah, marry a hoe. 1.00

00:36:26.100 It's okay. 0.55

00:36:27.540 And I don't think he would let, I wonder if Michael would let a saved pedophile watch his children.

00:36:36.520 Never.

00:36:37.300 If you're using his logic.

00:36:39.460 Yeah, but he thought it was wise to bring a woman that used to get men to cheat her on married men. 1.00

00:36:44.980 Yes. 0.99

00:36:45.960 She's going to end up fucking one of the, sorry, by the language. 1.00

00:36:48.760 But I'm a swearer, I don't know. 1.00

00:36:51.280 But like, she's going to end up having sex with one of the married guys. 1.00

00:36:55.060 And they're going to be like, what happened? 0.97

00:36:56.760 How did this?

00:36:58.460 I can't believe she did that. 0.90

00:37:02.480 Shock and awe.

00:37:03.600 And then I'm the bad guy for pointing it out.

00:37:06.120 Absolutely.

00:37:07.140 And that is gynocentrum.

00:37:08.740 Modern gynocentrism is you cannot speak ill of any woman.

00:37:13.620 Or even question, why did you raise your prices after you were saved?

00:37:17.340 That seems a bit odd.

00:37:19.700 It does, doesn't it?

00:37:20.740 For somebody that's turned away from those ways.

00:37:24.240 Yeah.

00:37:25.180 So what, you said you think that men can spot out red flags pretty easily in women.

00:37:33.860 If they'll own the responsibility to do it. 1.00

00:37:36.920 Women's bullshit is so open and on display. 1.00

00:37:43.780 You can't not see it if you're looking for it. 1.00

00:37:47.600 I tell men all the time, you have to test women. 1.00

00:37:51.560 See if she's even this vindictive. 0.95

00:37:53.820 Just the tiniest amount of vindictiveness early on tells you that vindictiveness will be multiplied

00:37:59.580 by a million down the road once the infatuation's over and you're in a real relationship and

00:38:06.360 it goes south, you're going to see vindictiveness out of that person.

00:38:10.900 But men look at women and figure out, is she attracted to me or not?

00:38:16.380 And if she is and I'm attracted to her, that's all I need to know.

00:38:19.820 And then down the road, they're writing me or booking with me saying, I don't know what

00:38:25.640 happened.

00:38:28.200 It's a terrible problem, but you have to look.

00:38:33.160 You have to look.

00:38:34.000 How does she handle money? 1.00

00:38:35.680 What's her debt like?

00:38:38.460 Debt, okay.

00:38:39.620 Yes.

00:38:41.180 I want to know her credit score.

00:38:43.760 I want to know how much debt she has.

00:38:45.880 I want to know her spending habits, her interests.

00:38:48.920 I want to know how she handles pressure.

00:38:51.560 I want to know how she handles no.

00:38:54.820 And here's the problem, as we've been discussing, gynocentrism means there is no no.

00:39:02.000 Right.

00:39:03.380 And so men have to actually rebel against all their life's programming to do one simple

00:39:09.460 thing, to tell her no to something.

00:39:11.740 So how would a guy test early on for vindictiveness?

00:39:14.860 Because one thing I hear from men is that after the marriage, after the kids, the women

00:39:20.140 change.

00:39:21.800 I think they do after kids some.

00:39:24.380 But again, I'm just, I never did buy the, she was an angel. 0.76

00:39:28.940 And then one day she was a demon spawn.

00:39:34.260 I don't buy that.

00:39:36.020 It's there.

00:39:37.040 They didn't test her.

00:39:38.660 They didn't push.

00:39:40.700 Look at, ask her or tell her no to something.

00:39:43.940 If she wants to go see a movie, just say, no, I'm not into it tonight.

00:39:47.160 And then you watch very carefully what she does.

00:39:49.540 Does she get huffy about it?

00:39:52.220 Can she handle a no? 0.84

00:39:53.640 Can she handle a no to not spending money? 0.77

00:39:58.220 Does she want something?

00:39:59.680 I want a three carat diamond, whatever.

00:40:03.360 No, that's not going to happen.

00:40:07.100 What does she behave like then? 0.99

00:40:09.220 She'll tell you who she is.

00:40:11.000 She'll show you.

00:40:12.960 Does she feed into the idea of a relationship where a guy's running around trying to make

00:40:19.060 her happy all the time, like a trained seal, clapping his slippers, trying to get a piece

00:40:22.820 of fish?

00:40:23.680 Is that the setup she wants?

00:40:26.020 Because if she, if that's what she wants and that's what you're providing, there's two 0.87

00:40:30.480 problems.

00:40:31.040 There's her and there's you.

00:40:32.540 But I just don't buy these guys that say, oh, she perfect, just everything.

00:40:37.800 And then we got married and all of a sudden she was a different person.

00:40:41.840 Even though he's not a real man, if he doesn't pay for the date or like plan the date, it's

00:40:47.160 like, well, is it that big of a deal?

00:40:49.220 Like Starbucks, it's like 10 bucks.

00:40:51.460 No, and gosh, I think there's enough even traditionalists left in me that I would spring

00:40:59.780 for Starbucks or something like that.

00:41:02.720 But once it's established that you're not just two ships passing in the night, men need

00:41:07.920 to sit down with women and have a talk about money, how we're going to approach this. 1.00

00:41:12.160 Because if it means you think I'm here to treat you like a four-year-old and to take

00:41:16.500 you to the candy store every day, that's not going to happen.

00:41:20.640 And guys need to be able to say that.

00:41:23.480 99.9% of them never will.

00:41:25.760 No, well, that's one.

00:41:26.580 And then they say they don't know what happened.

00:41:28.660 I'm not buying it.

00:41:29.440 Well, that's one thing I disagreed with, with trad cons is the women working. 1.00

00:41:33.420 They think women should just never work. 1.00

00:41:35.760 And I, I, um.

00:41:37.460 Try that with 9% inflation.

00:41:39.260 Sure.

00:41:40.520 Well, the reason I came to this conclusion was I saw two job postings.

00:41:44.740 One was a fireman for 22 an hour.

00:41:46.740 And one was a, it was like a diversity and inclusion officer for 22 an hour.

00:41:50.880 And I thought like, if that's, so if you're as a family, one of you has to work, it would

00:41:55.460 kind of make sense for her to, because I mean, what he's going to risk his life every day

00:42:00.320 or you get to go sit in an air conditioned office doing nothing for eight hours.

00:42:04.760 You can't do that.

00:42:05.880 It's not like working at a farm a hundred years ago.

00:42:08.320 So now how, I mean, I think you make perfect sense.

00:42:12.000 Yeah.

00:42:12.480 How far would that go with the average woman? 1.00

00:42:14.240 Oh no, no, they would get so mad.

00:42:16.540 It would end right then and there.

00:42:18.400 Yeah.

00:42:18.640 Well, and I think it's different if women, if we, if we came to the table with at least 0.99

00:42:22.800 youth and maybe six kids like back in the, it would make sense for us to stay home.

00:42:27.100 But it's like, we're offering one to two kids.

00:42:29.600 They're in public school.

00:42:30.800 We're getting married around 30.

00:42:32.140 So why is there no compromise?

00:42:34.540 It doesn't make sense to me.

00:42:35.880 And I think this goes back to trad con men really getting things confused.

00:42:42.880 They, they want children, not women. 1.00

00:42:46.700 They want somebody to take care of and to, and I think in their mind, somebody they can

00:42:52.580 control.

00:42:54.080 Um, they're, they're put off by women who really are independent. 1.00

00:42:59.280 I mean, every feminist is a strong independent woman until the check arrives, but there are 1.00

00:43:05.140 actually strong independent women out there who make perfectly suitable partners for a 1.00

00:43:10.860 guy that's screening out all the garbage.

00:43:13.480 But I'm just, uh, I, I don't buy that.

00:43:18.200 Don't work.

00:43:19.280 Yeah.

00:43:19.800 Um, this is not a world in which, uh, one financially, it's really hard, especially these

00:43:26.060 days to not have two salaries for most people.

00:43:29.380 I mean, if the guy's making a million dollars a month, it doesn't matter whether she works, 0.99

00:43:33.600 but for the most part, it's needed.

00:43:37.180 Only these guys, these trad cons are just holding onto something that disappeared like 40 years

00:43:43.540 ago.

00:43:43.880 Um, yeah, well, and then they want you to get on their team, but they lost.

00:43:47.980 Yeah.

00:43:48.500 What have they preserved?

00:43:50.300 And those guys, guess what happens to another part of this that has to be considered.

00:43:54.420 You take on somebody and you become their financial benefactor and you're taking care of their

00:43:59.060 life.

00:43:59.820 When the relationship ends and you end up in court, guess what the court sees?

00:44:04.660 She's used to being provided for.

00:44:08.120 The very thing that they set up is exactly what the family courts are going to prepare for. 1.00

00:44:13.960 And of course, a lot of these idiots will tell you, well, if you're a real man, she won't 1.00

00:44:18.140 go to family court. 1.00

00:44:19.740 I mean, and I don't know what to do with that level of delusional thinking, except say, fine,

00:44:26.160 just go ahead and do it, dude.

00:44:28.540 Marry her, take care of her. 0.96

00:44:30.060 And then when taking care of her is not enough and average woman will file for divorce at seven 1.00

00:44:35.820 or eight years, which happens to magically coincide with guys' max income potential.

00:44:40.560 Right when they're at peak salary, that's when the divorce is filed.

00:44:45.320 You want to set that up?

00:44:46.780 Go for it.

00:44:47.940 I can use a business.

00:44:48.980 Well, and even if you look at conservatives, like the older generation and the younger,

00:44:57.760 half of them are still divorced.

00:44:59.800 Like, I think it's mean the way they sell their religion as an anecdote and to like family

00:45:07.500 court.

00:45:07.900 I just think it's mean and it's not correct.

00:45:10.120 Look at Steven Crowder.

00:45:11.120 Crowder, he had a very different tune like 10 years ago.

00:45:14.580 And I like Crowder.

00:45:15.600 Like, I have a lot of empathy for what happened to him, but it's like 10 years ago.

00:45:20.300 I think what happened to him gave him a little bit of empathy, too, because he ended up apologizing

00:45:25.800 to the men's rights guys for the bad-mouthing them over the years.

00:45:31.640 And sadly, this is what it takes.

00:45:34.160 And with all respect, I like Crowder, too, like his work, but look at it, until it happened

00:45:41.600 to him, he didn't give a damn.

00:45:44.000 Yeah.

00:45:44.660 And that's what I see in all of these trad cons.

00:45:48.140 Oh, it's not happening to me.

00:45:50.300 It's not my problem.

00:45:52.380 Most selfish, self-absorbed people, and this is why I think those guys are really more inclined

00:45:58.520 to want the little traditional housewife that will take care of everything for them and 1.00

00:46:04.520 doesn't think or talk too much.

00:46:06.840 It'd be fine if women could do that. 1.00

00:46:10.120 Or if they would.

00:46:11.480 Yeah, they would.

00:46:13.280 Like, what women are you guys meeting?

00:46:15.320 I've interviewed 1,000.

00:46:16.500 I could maybe count two, like two out of 1,000.

00:46:20.620 Those are not good odds.

00:46:22.160 I went through 25 potential partners before I met my current.

00:46:29.960 I had to reject.

00:46:31.540 And a lot of them rejected me.

00:46:33.700 The moment I said, you know, financially, you got to show up and carry your weight, they

00:46:40.360 were done.

00:46:41.400 In that moment, absolutely done.

00:46:43.660 And that's okay, because I finally, because I wouldn't settle for anything less, I kept

00:46:50.760 doing that until a woman said, well, yeah, that makes sense.

00:46:54.720 Like, oh, okay, we can talk more.

00:46:57.840 Yeah.

00:46:58.820 But these guys don't want that.

00:47:00.960 That's fine by me.

00:47:03.160 But the age of needing a woman in the home to raise a child or to raise two kids, one and 0.97

00:47:09.780 a half kids, whatever, that's just not even thoughtful.

00:47:13.660 Well, and again, they always think we're talking, I'm like, I'm not attacking if your wife wants

00:47:19.340 to be, and I have a friend that did that.

00:47:21.060 She's a stay-at-home mom.

00:47:22.040 She has five kids.

00:47:23.620 And that, I mean, she works. 0.95

00:47:25.220 She, she, they have chickens. 1.00

00:47:26.640 She does all the stuff around the house.

00:47:28.840 Or I meant like works at home.

00:47:30.900 I got nothing against that, but let's not pretend women are doing that. 1.00

00:47:34.480 Yes, let's go.

00:47:35.880 June Cleaver died.

00:47:38.040 That's over.

00:47:39.060 Yeah.

00:47:39.360 This is not the life.

00:47:40.720 These women are hitting the gym and, and do an enjoyable thing. 1.00

00:47:45.260 They're Pilates.

00:47:46.280 And it's a life of, of a lot of leisure and a lot of self-care.

00:47:51.820 And man, I would suggest to any guy, if what you want is a woman who's obsessed with herself, 1.00

00:47:59.300 maybe you ought to look in the mirror and ask yourself some questions.

00:48:02.620 What do you think when Tradcon say that you, when we say this, that we're just submitting

00:48:07.420 to feminism? 0.98

00:48:09.060 I think that's a cheap out.

00:48:11.860 You know, just because I think that women should carry the weight financially doesn't 1.00

00:48:18.220 make me a feminist any more than speaking English makes me a feminist because feminists 1.00

00:48:22.920 speak English too. 0.99

00:48:24.120 It's an absolutely bullshit comparison. 0.99

00:48:26.400 Um, it is 2024, uh, the economy, they rigged the economy to, to need a tax base of, of two 0.99

00:48:35.200 people working in relationships.

00:48:36.840 This was done by design a long time ago.

00:48:39.780 Those days are over for the average person.

00:48:42.440 If you've got a ton of money, you can beat the system.

00:48:45.200 But for most people, it's not a doable arrangement.

00:48:48.320 It's just not going to work.

00:48:49.680 My least favorite one, I think influencers get these super big heads.

00:48:55.940 They're like, everyone become an influencer.

00:48:57.760 I'm like, how are we going to keep the lights on?

00:49:00.400 I had this conversation.

00:49:01.600 I like Sneeko, but I had this conversation with him when I interviewed him last that he

00:49:05.620 was like, well, everyone should become an influencer.

00:49:08.100 And I'm just like, okay, well, electricity factor, like your phone.

00:49:14.440 Water.

00:49:14.700 Yeah.

00:49:16.700 Like, I don't know.

00:49:17.600 I don't know if that'll work, but no, no, but going back to the, you know, I've had that

00:49:24.280 over the years too, on several subjects.

00:49:27.040 Oh, you sound like a feminist. 1.00

00:49:28.520 Well, if what I'm saying is making sense, then it's either true or it's not regardless

00:49:34.500 of what people think it sounds like.

00:49:37.440 Um, I think women should also have practice ultimate accountability for everything in their 1.00

00:49:43.820 lives, which is the most non-feminist idea that has ever existed. 0.99

00:49:48.440 Um, but if guys need to say, oh, he's just emulating feminists to feel better about what 0.70

00:49:54.820 they're doing.

00:49:55.520 Why about me?

00:49:56.420 Yeah.

00:49:56.760 So in the recent diverting hate document that was funded by the department of homeland security,

00:50:04.540 the female authors expressed concern over anyone calling men simps or referring to male

00:50:11.200 behaviors as simping.

00:50:13.100 They say simping is really just another word for love, kindness, love and kindness towards

00:50:19.180 women and that people who don't do want to do that are being radicalized. 1.00

00:50:24.320 I'm going to read this article to you.

00:50:26.600 Sure.

00:50:27.180 Um, stop simping how misogynistic influencers humiliate women to discourage sympathy.

00:50:33.320 A disconnecting trend or a disconcerning trend has surfaced within the manosphere of YouTube

00:50:41.880 characterized by a series of videos where men pro proudly proclaim to stop simping through

00:50:48.180 public humiliation of women.

00:50:50.300 They demonstrate how not sympathizing with showing too much attention for, or otherwise

00:50:55.080 being submissive to women can lead to the actual harassment and bullying of women while 0.59

00:51:00.160 providing them a false sense of power.

00:51:02.460 This phenomenon is, is linked to the theory of gynocentrism and fueled by the belief that

00:51:09.720 men often prioritize women at the expense of their own wellbeing.

00:51:13.160 Simp is sometimes used as a, simp is sometimes used as a derogatory term to troll men and extend

00:51:20.880 any positive expression or behavior towards women, particularly kindness in exchange for 0.99

00:51:26.180 some action, usually romantic interest.

00:51:29.140 Simping can be used in the lieu of standing, standing, which to say someone is an extreme

00:51:35.700 fan of something.

00:51:36.660 Gynocentrism, originally describing a dominant focus on women in theory or practice has been

00:51:42.780 manipulated by some to be that societal chivalry and white knight behavior prioritizes women

00:51:48.820 over other groups.

00:51:50.380 Men go in their own way.

00:51:51.500 MGTOW, for example, identifies itself as a reaction against the perceived misandry of

00:51:57.100 gynocentrism.

00:51:57.960 Why do you think the government is so obsessed with micromanaging men's minds and behaviors

00:52:06.140 when they simply want to avoid traditional yoke and go their own way?

00:52:10.440 Do you think the government might have concerns about the demographic collapse we're seeing

00:52:15.000 in marriage and birth rates?

00:52:16.740 Or do you think there is some other reason?

00:52:18.760 I think there's both.

00:52:20.280 I think the government probably is concerned about those things.

00:52:23.300 I know if you look at countries like Japan, they're in trouble.

00:52:25.940 South Korea is in trouble right now with birth rates.

00:52:29.620 But this also blends with cultural gynocentrism that we have now, because what that said,

00:52:35.100 if you reduce it just to the basics, is that if you don't simp, you hate women. 1.00

00:52:41.880 If you don't grovel, then you're a misogynist.

00:52:44.980 If you don't fawn over women, then you're not a man.

00:52:48.980 This is the same basic principle we've been sitting here talking about for a few minutes.

00:52:54.520 It's government's concerned, yeah.

00:52:57.320 Because if men ever, if the preponderance of men went red pill, there would be real trouble. 0.83

00:53:06.660 Real trouble.

00:53:07.640 And red pill thinking is growing.

00:53:10.580 It's happening.

00:53:11.460 I mean, there's content creators like you and a bunch of others out there now that are

00:53:15.640 even mainstreaming these ideas.

00:53:17.840 And I think they are concerned about it.

00:53:19.380 But I also know that this is, when you have feminist academicians and you get government 1.00

00:53:24.160 money, you're going to get studies like that and papers like that, regardless of whether

00:53:28.940 or not the government's concerned about it.

00:53:32.200 But of course, if their plan is to do something about it through something like this, all they're

00:53:37.300 going to do is create more of it.

00:53:39.560 Because I hear that, and the first thing I want to do is rebel.

00:53:42.940 Well, it's like, oh, so I have to, and I love how they conflated simping with sympathy.

00:53:52.340 I don't know if you caught that as you were reading.

00:53:55.220 They want to say that if you don't simp, you're unsympathetic.

00:54:01.980 I think I'm very sympathetic to women.

00:54:04.760 I do.

00:54:05.120 I think they've gotten a raw deal by being infantilized, and they've been coddled to

00:54:10.400 the point of not even being able to think rationally about many topics because of what

00:54:17.160 we've enabled in that, what men have done to enable them.

00:54:20.600 I have compassion about that, and I hope it changes someday.

00:54:25.280 But this is just simply trying to conflate sympathy with simping and another way to try to shame

00:54:33.120 men into not expressing what's really on their mind, and it's not going to work.

00:54:38.480 And I don't think it's kind to women to lie. 0.99

00:54:41.840 And that's what I realized, is all these guys are just liars. 0.77

00:54:45.780 Well, the thing is, that's the social contract with women now. 1.00

00:54:49.880 You have to lie to them.

00:54:52.020 Every woman is beautiful.

00:54:53.440 No women are fat and ugly. 1.00

00:54:56.100 No women are hoes. 1.00

00:54:57.940 No women are unfit for marriage.

00:55:00.820 You've got to tell women how great they are. 0.94

00:55:03.280 You have to be very much girl power. 1.00

00:55:06.100 And that's just the social contract now.

00:55:08.680 That's what Michael knows. 0.99

00:55:10.280 All these clowns, this is what they're doing. 0.99

00:55:12.620 They're just following the gynocentric script. 0.98

00:55:15.700 And they're actually claiming, in some cases, like a Daily Wire, to sort of be edgy about

00:55:22.960 this stuff.

00:55:23.520 They're not edgy.

00:55:24.580 These guys are down on their knees with jewels, holding them up, all of them, doing

00:55:29.580 this.

00:55:30.140 They're just doing it differently than it's been done in the past.

00:55:33.740 But it's the same thing.

00:55:35.300 Even the fact they interviewed Nala before they interviewed you, it's like you have 22 0.99

00:55:39.700 years of experience in men's advocacy, men's rights, and they put on a porn star before 0.50

00:55:47.100 you.

00:55:47.760 Really?

00:55:48.700 Oh, those guys won't even acknowledge I exist.

00:55:51.340 Yeah.

00:55:51.700 And they can't.

00:55:55.660 It would, I don't expect, I mean, I was telling you earlier, I reached out to Jordan Peterson,

00:56:02.340 at least through his intermediaries.

00:56:04.500 Yeah.

00:56:06.200 And never got a response.

00:56:08.760 I reached out in other places.

00:56:11.420 These guys won't even acknowledge when, if you're doing real red pill stuff as a man,

00:56:16.820 they will not acknowledge you exist because they can't argue with you and they know it.

00:56:21.800 I know.

00:56:22.060 Even sometimes I get opportunities and I feel like other people should get them before me

00:56:26.300 and I think they should.

00:56:27.820 You know, like sometimes, even when I went there, I was like, there's so many guys that

00:56:31.780 have been doing this for 20 plus years, but they want to talk to me, the woman.

00:56:36.060 I'm like, why don't you guys go talk to the actual men that have been literally, and

00:56:40.040 you know, I'm thankful for the opportunity.

00:56:42.260 So I'm not like, I'm not trying to knock it, but it's just like, I'm like, some of these

00:56:46.940 guys have been doing this for 20 years.

00:56:48.780 Why, why aren't they in here?

00:56:50.140 Why aren't you talking to the guys that have lived this?

00:56:52.820 You know?

00:56:54.700 Uh, I would love to hear their answer to that, but it's not going to come.

00:57:01.040 And I think, I honestly think, I mean, it may even sound a bit overinflated, but I really

00:57:07.280 think they're scared.

00:57:08.300 I don't think they want to face a guy who's ready to challenge their ideas.

00:57:13.520 Somebody that's been doing this a long time and who understands the topic very, very well.

00:57:18.460 I don't think they want any part of that at all. 0.99

00:57:20.700 Well, and they would be assholes. 1.00

00:57:22.800 They would be absolute. 1.00

00:57:24.140 If they had to say what, sometimes when I was talking to him, I'm like, I want you to

00:57:29.940 tell a man that has been lied to about the paternity of his kid.

00:57:34.260 Tell him, tell him that he's wrong for getting a divorce.

00:57:37.180 Tell him, go, go, say that to his face.

00:57:40.620 Tell him he's a feminist. 1.00

00:57:42.500 Go, go tell the military members that are coming home from deployment to their wife, 0.99

00:57:46.900 robbing them and stealing their kids.

00:57:48.480 Tell him, tell him that they, they just weren't man enough.

00:57:51.540 Tell him, go ahead.

00:57:53.040 Yeah.

00:57:53.320 Tell him what they could have done better.

00:57:55.480 But they can't.

00:57:56.520 They're not going to do that.

00:57:57.760 No, they think, they read a couple studies.

00:57:59.700 They think they're smarter than they are.

00:58:01.220 Well, and they have a set, a lot of it is ideological.

00:58:04.880 They're, they're every bit as ideological as feminists because their logic always breaks 1.00

00:58:09.820 down when it comes to the marital argument and to divorce.

00:58:14.400 They have no argument.

00:58:16.260 There is no argument to tell a guy that's raised a child for three years and then found out the

00:58:21.620 child wasn't his.

00:58:22.920 What do you tell that guy?

00:58:24.220 There's nothing you can tell him except try to take care of yourself.

00:58:29.600 I'm sorry, this terrible thing happened to you.

00:58:32.840 But no, instead of that, from these guys, they would get, just man up, bro.

00:58:38.880 That child needs a parent and you're there.

00:58:42.200 So just, you know, don't get divorced.

00:58:44.340 Well, why didn't you pick, you just picked the wrong woman, which, okay, he might have,

00:58:49.780 but you know, but a lot of women have picked the wrong men. 1.00

00:58:53.040 They're not enslaved for 18 years, but both genders pick the wrong person often. 0.99

00:58:59.660 Like that's, that's a normal thing.

00:59:00.940 We're very good at that in the West, picking the wrong people.

00:59:04.920 So do you think it's always been like this, simping?

00:59:08.720 No.

00:59:10.140 I would say William, the ninth Duke of Aquitaine was the world's first simp.

00:59:16.280 He was a guy that put an image of his mistress on his shield to go into battle.

00:59:21.900 And he was all about romance.

00:59:24.980 He was the one who inspired his granddaughter and great-granddaughter, I believe, or daughter

00:59:30.700 and granddaughter, to commission troubadours to spread the romantic message throughout

00:59:36.060 the medieval.

00:59:36.960 What are troubadours?

00:59:38.640 Poets and songwriters to go out and extol the virtues of romantic love throughout the

00:59:44.740 European courts.

00:59:45.900 And that's how it got filtered into the mainstream.

00:59:48.860 That's what happened.

00:59:50.000 So we do have an original simp.

00:59:52.260 His name was William.

00:59:54.320 So basically before that, it was arranged marriages, right?

00:59:58.840 Yep.

00:59:59.040 And then this guy came out.

01:00:00.180 And it continued for a long time to be arranged marriages, but it eventually was phased out

01:00:05.020 as romance took a foothold in male-female relations. 0.99

01:00:10.360 And people began to say, oh, this is elevated.

01:00:13.580 Then it gave them permission to pursue raw base feelings, infatuation, sexual urges into

01:00:20.560 the marital contract.

01:00:21.920 But before that, yeah, it was arranged marriages.

01:00:25.280 And arranged marriages still work a hundred times better than romantic ones.

01:00:29.760 So it was basically that this guy, so who was the woman he was simping for?

01:00:34.420 Who was this chick? 1.00

01:00:35.320 I don't know.

01:00:37.200 I've read on it, it was just his mistress is the only thing.

01:00:41.480 That's a question I would pose for Peter Wright.

01:00:44.140 So he was married, and then he did, was he married, this guy?

01:00:47.960 I think so.

01:00:48.660 And then he ditched the marriage for the, and his, oh, and so he created romantic love.

01:00:54.220 Well, he popularized that notion, especially among the people who followed him.

01:01:01.360 And it put him, interestingly enough, because we hear a lot of romantic drivel from people

01:01:06.440 out of the church, his actions put him in conflict with the church.

01:01:12.200 I think it almost got him excommunicated.

01:01:14.460 Oh, no way.

01:01:15.620 Yeah.

01:01:16.540 Because he was, in effect, worshiping women.

01:01:20.000 Right, instead of God.

01:01:22.160 Yeah, there's a difference between the two.

01:01:24.860 You know what I was thinking about?

01:01:26.720 So conservatives want people to wait until they're married to have sex, right? 0.69

01:01:30.760 And they want traditional relationships to return.

01:01:34.340 But they're not really giving Christians the tools to do that.

01:01:39.000 Because I think people lose their virginity at like 15, 16 years old.

01:01:43.840 So it's like, if you're not encouraging people to marry that young, or even, okay, we want

01:01:48.740 to say 18, fine, 18.

01:01:50.460 Right.

01:01:50.660 But what do you think is going to happen?

01:01:54.680 Like, people aren't going to wait until they're now 30 to have sex.

01:01:58.100 No.

01:01:58.960 So it's like, if you're not putting together maybe some arranged marriage or really pushing

01:02:03.840 like young marriage, what do you think is going to happen?

01:02:07.360 Well, what's going to happen is what's happening, which is marriages fail, the relationships fail.

01:02:15.400 I mean, they're chasing 1950, and that toothpaste is out of the tube, and you're not going to

01:02:21.960 put it back in.

01:02:22.960 Yeah.

01:02:23.360 That's not going to happen.

01:02:24.860 Yeah, birthplace.

01:02:25.280 But instead of telling young men and teaching young men discernment, they do not teach discernment

01:02:32.960 with young men.

01:02:34.420 They teach them, please the woman until she accepts you. 1.00

01:02:39.320 They're not saying screen her.

01:02:41.780 I mean, these are in churches. 0.92

01:02:43.760 They can't even definitively say don't date a porn star.

01:02:47.500 They can't even definitively, like, come on.

01:02:50.240 A porn, really?

01:02:51.380 You can't, kind of like, I'm not saying. 0.94

01:02:58.020 But she's same.

01:02:59.840 I'm like, really?

01:03:00.640 That's such a low bar.

01:03:02.000 We can't even get the bar has not done porn. 0.97

01:03:06.500 And then they'll say, but men watch porn. 1.00

01:03:08.360 I'm like, well, the women aren't fucking them. 1.00

01:03:10.460 What are they supposed to do? 1.00

01:03:12.700 Like, I wish I thought of that the other day.

01:03:17.300 Well.

01:03:17.840 Like, you know, if they're not, the women don't want to get married young. 1.00

01:03:20.620 We have the choice to.

01:03:21.860 We don't choose it.

01:03:22.580 So it's like, the women don't want to sleep with them when they're young until they're 1.00

01:03:25.900 like 30.

01:03:26.580 I've heard that's when guys, like, dating life changes.

01:03:29.340 Yep.

01:03:29.580 What are they supposed to do in the meantime?

01:03:32.540 Well, I think it's probably good advice to tell young men that porn can make changes

01:03:37.820 to your brain and affect you.

01:03:39.620 It's not the best thing in the world.

01:03:41.720 But again, they'll teach the guy incessantly about don't do porn, don't do this, don't

01:03:49.700 do that.

01:03:50.200 When it comes to women, do this, get a great job, work hard, please her, become an attractive

01:03:54.940 man and all that.

01:03:56.540 And not one word about her character comes into this at all.

01:04:01.760 And that'll come right out of the pastor's mouth too.

01:04:05.060 You see this in Christian counseling all the time.

01:04:07.620 It's absolutely insane. 0.93

01:04:09.780 They are so warped by gynocentrism. 0.99

01:04:13.220 Well, my point isn't that porn changes their brain.

01:04:16.520 It was more that I don't think it's the same thing. 0.97

01:04:19.440 A guy watching porn as a woman being an absolute porn. 0.99

01:04:23.080 Of course, it's a ridiculous comparison. 1.00

01:04:26.540 But I mean, this is where their brains go. 0.94

01:04:29.880 When you can't add two and two and get four, you've got to come up with a way to imagine

01:04:34.880 that the answer is five. 0.86

01:04:36.160 And, oh, well, porn, doing porn, it's all the same.

01:04:40.900 No, it's not.

01:04:42.600 It's like doing drugs and selling drugs are two different things.

01:04:47.620 Right, right.

01:04:49.840 But, and I understand under the principle of salvation that we're all sinners, we're all

01:04:57.920 fallen.

01:04:58.340 We come before God as sinners and we, none of us measure up.

01:05:03.240 And so we're not to condemn each other.

01:05:06.680 But again, I go back to the analogy that, okay, if you're really going to take that to

01:05:11.760 the extreme, then you don't have a problem with a saved pedophile watching your kids while

01:05:15.620 you're out of town.

01:05:17.280 You don't have a problem with a drug addict who's like been off drugs for 32 days, taking

01:05:24.720 care of your home and watching your property. 1.00

01:05:26.740 No, it's not a call to be stupid, but, and in all those other cases, those Christian people 1.00

01:05:34.380 would get it. 1.00

01:05:35.220 Oh, yeah, I don't want a pedophile watching my kid.

01:05:37.300 No, I don't want a guy with a history of burglary taking care of my home. 1.00

01:05:40.460 They want a whore around their husband. 1.00

01:05:41.900 But it's like, oh, she used to be a prostitute. 1.00

01:05:45.920 Um, that's not the same. 0.96

01:05:51.360 You know, it's funny to tell you this story.

01:05:53.800 I met a guy who said that they, you know, the D.A.R.E. program, they would bring in like

01:05:59.380 ex-drug addicts to talk to them.

01:06:01.260 And I guess one of them used to sell drugs at this guy's high school. 1.00

01:06:05.520 Like, you guys are so stupid. 1.00

01:06:07.680 They also found that with the D.A.R.E. program, I'm going to get on that podium for a moment 1.00

01:06:15.780 with the D.A.R.E. program, that when you went in to try to persuade kids not to do drugs,

01:06:20.860 they ended up doing more drugs.

01:06:22.220 Yeah, you're like telling them what to buy the drugs.

01:06:24.000 Yeah, you've got an adult in there saying, don't do this.

01:06:27.000 What do you think is going to happen with an adolescent?

01:06:29.260 Yeah, I know, same with sex ed.

01:06:30.800 It's like, what do you guys, maybe the school should just let the parents do that.

01:06:34.880 Yeah, yeah, you think?

01:06:36.820 Yeah, but it's women teaching. 1.00

01:06:39.500 But it's women teaching. 1.00

01:06:41.680 And we need to change that.

01:06:43.460 If I could change anything, it would be I would have 70% male teachers in primary education.

01:06:49.120 Yeah, I agree.

01:06:50.700 I agree.

01:06:51.040 This idea that women are more nurturing is the hardest thing to beat out of people. 1.00

01:06:55.980 Everyone thinks I'm so evil because I say that.

01:06:58.180 But I'm like, guys, I just noticed that everything that women said we were better at, 1.00

01:07:03.340 whether it's like femininity, nurturing, whatever, like there was never any data to prove it.

01:07:09.340 Nope.

01:07:10.580 And it's not true.

01:07:12.040 I think women are probably more nurturing with their own children when they're very young 1.00

01:07:18.040 than another person would be with their children.

01:07:21.700 But nurturing, generally speaking, in a relationship, relationships require some nurturing. 0.99

01:07:27.720 And women suck at it. 1.00

01:07:29.020 In my experience, they're just terrible at it. 1.00

01:07:31.560 They don't have it to give, most of them.

01:07:35.420 Yeah.

01:07:35.620 You're very lucky if you find one that does.

01:07:38.260 So, I mean, and of course, I say it, that makes me a misogynist too.

01:07:41.600 But it is what it is.

01:07:43.660 That's my experience.

01:07:44.800 I am a misogynist.

01:07:46.140 Yes, yes. 0.54

01:07:47.180 I like being a misogynist.

01:07:49.460 That was my original handle when I first got started was the Happy Misogynist.

01:07:53.780 That was my first website.

01:07:56.400 Well, I think it makes you, if you're a little misogynistic, you treat your husband and your

01:08:03.880 father with a little bit more respect because you view them as superior.

01:08:07.900 So, I don't think it's really a bad thing.

01:08:09.940 But, you know, the way they frame it today is it's hating women. 0.97

01:08:13.740 But I don't think it's, I think that men in general are superior to women.

01:08:19.220 They're just better than women at everything. 1.00

01:08:20.780 They're stronger.

01:08:21.700 Yeah, yeah.

01:08:22.340 So, I don't, I don't, but everyone gets mad when I say that.

01:08:26.140 So, I don't know.

01:08:27.220 Well, again, you've broken the rule of gynocentrism.

01:08:32.040 You could, now, if you got online and you said women are superior, they can do anything men 1.00

01:08:36.740 can do, do it better and do it in heels. 0.99

01:08:39.600 That's presidential talk.

01:08:41.340 That's how our presidents talk.

01:08:43.280 Yeah.

01:08:43.880 That's what we want to hear.

01:08:45.500 And anybody that doesn't toe that line, bad pearl.

01:08:49.580 Well, and I'm like, guys, what are, I'm like, men have Elon Musk.

01:08:53.580 We have Kim Kardashian.

01:08:55.420 So, I'm like, these are our billionaires.

01:08:57.860 What are we doing?

01:08:59.240 We have Kylie Jenner.

01:09:00.660 She's selling makeup. 0.99

01:09:02.040 Like, I mean, it's cool, but we're going to pretend that they're the same entrepreneurs

01:09:06.880 as Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs.

01:09:10.300 Really?

01:09:10.720 This is what we have to offer?

01:09:12.440 Donald Trump.

01:09:14.320 Yeah.

01:09:15.360 Yeah.

01:09:17.040 What, do you think that romantic chivalry is accepted in church today?

01:09:21.580 And if yes, what effect do you think that has on relationships between Christian men and

01:09:26.740 women? 1.00

01:09:26.980 I think it's mandated in churches today.

01:09:30.780 I don't think it's just part of the deal.

01:09:33.140 It's like, if you don't subscribe to it, romantic chivalry is everything. 0.99

01:09:38.660 It's why we have churches doing date night crap. 0.99

01:09:42.220 Oh, yeah. 0.97

01:09:42.660 I got into a long-term relationship, so I quit dating.

01:09:47.440 Yeah.

01:09:48.280 Don't want to date.

01:09:49.700 But it's all about recreating that romantic buzz that they had early on in the relationship,

01:09:56.940 which one you're not going to recreate.

01:10:00.580 Infatuation fades, and it's done.

01:10:03.500 It happens in every relationship.

01:10:05.200 But it's all about getting a man.

01:10:08.080 When we say date night, this is about running out and spending money on her and doing things 0.58

01:10:14.900 to make her feel feminine and to make her feel attended to and what have you.

01:10:19.180 That's what dating is for. 0.61

01:10:20.580 That's the romantic model of dating.

01:10:23.540 So when they're selling date night from the pulpit, you know that you've got a model of

01:10:30.760 romantic chivalry underpinning everything.

01:10:34.220 And it's why I've noticed, I've seen, and I even quit attending my men's group in my church

01:10:41.980 because there'd be 25 guys in there and not one real word out of their mouth about anything.

01:10:49.120 They would talk about being abused by women, but how were they going to measure up so they

01:10:57.240 didn't get the abuse anymore?

01:10:58.560 They didn't call it abuse.

01:10:59.840 They just said she has a sharp tongue and she criticizes and she does this.

01:11:04.420 And the feedback they would get from the group, well, pray for her and keep your anger in check,

01:11:12.120 but not a single word about shutting down the abusive behavior.

01:11:15.760 That is not in their wheelhouse at all.

01:11:20.760 So marriages continue to fail.

01:11:23.500 How does it affect men and women? 0.89

01:11:25.480 I think underneath romance, you do have misogyny and you're going to have it because anytime

01:11:31.720 you put somebody in a role that I've got to take care of you and please you and make you

01:11:35.740 happy and it's nothing's about me, it's all about you.

01:11:39.420 My dreams don't matter.

01:11:40.920 My ambitions don't matter.

01:11:42.320 The things that make me happy don't matter.

01:11:43.900 It's all you, baby.

01:11:45.520 Who can do that for 20 years without being resentful?

01:11:50.140 So I always say is that you scratch a traditionalist and underneath you'll find a misogynist every

01:11:56.200 time.

01:11:57.220 Right.

01:11:57.760 Yeah. 0.87

01:11:58.080 No, men are, the simp men are the rudest to me. 0.93

01:12:01.540 Like, it's not even close. 0.82

01:12:03.640 And you can feel the rage.

01:12:05.320 Yeah, they're, they're always the ones like taunting me.

01:12:09.300 Why don't you get offline, get back in the kitchen, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

01:12:12.600 And I'm like, what?

01:12:15.280 I'm like, why are you like debating me?

01:12:17.420 Why are you here?

01:12:19.080 Like, they go home.

01:12:20.220 Maybe it's because you were busy working.

01:12:21.940 Yeah.

01:12:22.060 You know, um, yeah, I've never really, for the most part, like most of the misogynistic

01:12:30.820 creators have been the nicest to me.

01:12:34.560 Hello.

01:12:35.260 Yeah.

01:12:35.800 Yeah.

01:12:36.000 Like I always say, if you scratch a people pleaser, you'll find a people hater at her

01:12:40.780 time because if your whole life is about making people happy, you cannot not resent

01:12:45.520 that at some point.

01:12:48.120 So these guys, oh, I'm just happy to let her walk on me.

01:12:52.180 No, they're not.

01:12:53.220 They end up killing their wives sometimes.

01:12:55.800 So what do you think when a woman's mouthing off? 1.00

01:12:58.900 Should the guy leave or should he put her in check?

01:13:01.380 Both.

01:13:02.560 Okay.

01:13:03.160 How?

01:13:03.540 Well, leaving is a statement all on its own, but I think it's better when you accompany

01:13:10.580 that, that, uh, I don't let anybody talk to me this way.

01:13:13.940 This ain't happening.

01:13:14.940 Bye.

01:13:16.460 Come back when you can act like a grownup and dress her down right there in public. 1.00

01:13:22.180 I've done it.

01:13:23.060 Wow.

01:13:25.760 Yeah.

01:13:26.180 I've never heard a church guy do that.

01:13:28.440 Oh no.

01:13:28.900 And they wouldn't approve of it.

01:13:30.180 Yeah.

01:13:30.820 In church.

01:13:31.380 You're just supposed to pray for her and you bend over harder a little more, let her

01:13:37.560 have a little more, take care of her a little better, which of course, feeding abusive behavior, 0.77

01:13:43.420 uh, that just doesn't seem like a real smart idea by rewarding abusive behavior with more

01:13:49.660 effort.

01:13:50.000 Well, that's, that's the other thing.

01:13:51.780 They keep saying men man up and marry anyway, but I'm like, what incentive would women have 1.00

01:13:55.820 to change if we keep getting rewarded for it?

01:14:00.440 And it's why this kind of change is so hard.

01:14:04.280 I mean, look, like I said, I'm, I wasn't being facetious.

01:14:08.400 I do feel for women in this. 0.99

01:14:10.140 I think the infantilization of women is the worst thing we've ever done to them. 0.90

01:14:14.140 Um, we have absolutely ruined their potential in many ways by not having women be accountable 1.00

01:14:22.360 for anything.

01:14:23.320 I can't tell you how many guys have told me I was married for 25 years.

01:14:27.440 She never once said, I'm sorry about anything ever.

01:14:32.280 I mean, over and over again, I've heard this.

01:14:35.200 It won't have been the wrong.

01:14:36.360 Um, and we have facilitated that in women, men have reinforced this for a very long time

01:14:45.120 and they'll enforce it on each other.

01:14:48.720 If your guys in church were to hold a woman accountable and say, wait a minute, you know, 0.90

01:14:53.020 um, all right, you were a porn star six weeks ago.

01:14:55.980 So why don't we wait about six years and, and see how you're doing then before we really

01:15:01.700 evaluate how you are.

01:15:02.920 You're not going to hear that because that would be holding her to account for her past. 0.55

01:15:08.340 Should I believe it?

01:15:09.120 Let her go to a missionary for three years. 0.98

01:15:11.640 Yes.

01:15:12.180 I would, I would maybe after three years of missionary work, you know, I would still be

01:15:18.280 skeptical, but I, you wouldn't see.

01:15:19.940 And there would still be a lot of other testing to do to find out what her characters really

01:15:25.000 like, but no, it's, uh, she shows up in church and says, I'm saved.

01:15:29.800 And what she was five minutes ago doesn't matter.

01:15:32.940 And the men will turn on each other.

01:15:35.020 If a single one of them says, wait a minute, let's hold back here just for a moment.

01:15:39.600 The rest of the men will converge on him.

01:15:41.860 Oh my gosh.

01:15:44.460 I'll pray for you. 1.00

01:15:48.800 They'll, they'll die on the hill of a porn star. 1.00

01:15:51.460 And then say like, you know, all the Catholics like got together to decide if they should 1.00

01:15:57.040 debate me.

01:15:57.720 Isn't that crazy?

01:15:59.160 I was like, what crime have I committed?

01:16:03.120 I wouldn't say I'm a good Catholic, but I'm like, I go to, I go to mass, you know, like

01:16:11.300 once a month, maybe more sometimes depends how much I travel.

01:16:14.700 But I'm like, I'm like, what did I do?

01:16:18.000 I didn't commit a crime.

01:16:19.220 There's no porn to me on the internet.

01:16:20.960 There's no like, what, what was my, but they'll, they'll treat you like a demon while dying on 0.99

01:16:28.060 the hill of a porn star. 0.99

01:16:29.980 I'm like, really?

01:16:30.840 You, all the strong men had to debate, like to get together and talk if they could talk

01:16:36.120 to me.

01:16:36.700 And then they'll tell you, I don't know what this gyno syndrome, gyno centrism is.

01:16:41.020 You're talking about, what is that stuff?

01:16:43.880 I mean, it's like the, the amount of blindness and denial in this is just staggering.

01:16:49.380 It's so crazy. 0.99

01:16:51.240 I was like, I was like, damn, they treat me like a demon. 0.99

01:16:55.320 What did I do? 0.99

01:16:56.980 You questioned the gyno centric narrative.

01:16:59.580 Yeah.

01:17:00.300 I mean, and I've, I'll give you a compliment on this.

01:17:03.280 There's been many females get into this space. 1.00

01:17:09.560 Only a very small hand of a handful of them really get down to the stuff we're talking

01:17:14.740 about.

01:17:16.120 Most of them avoid it.

01:17:17.760 And it's sort of like what they're doing is they, they enter the men's right space because

01:17:23.540 they have some sort of fantasy about getting men back up on their white stallions to, to, 0.99

01:17:29.140 they want the, the, the men of old sort of thing and red pill men are not buying that

01:17:35.040 as a narrative, but that's what they're looking for.

01:17:37.980 And when then they get frustrated by it and then they start trying to rearrange the furniture

01:17:42.680 and the guys aren't going to go for that.

01:17:45.840 And then they get mad and we got one of them out there now.

01:17:48.660 I won't even say her name, but she's just running around everywhere. 1.00

01:17:51.260 Can we?

01:17:52.040 Can we?

01:17:52.780 Okay.

01:17:53.300 Hi, Nattie. 0.53

01:17:54.820 Oh, Nattie.

01:17:55.660 I thought you were going to say Lauren Southern.

01:17:57.640 Oh, no.

01:17:58.320 Or Sydney Watts.

01:17:59.340 I thought you were going to say one of them.

01:18:00.240 Yeah.

01:18:00.540 They're both 20 minutes ago.

01:18:02.340 Okay.

01:18:03.280 Nattie?

01:18:03.900 Who's Nattie? 0.98

01:18:04.780 I don't know who that is.

01:18:05.360 Nattie Kadifa.

01:18:06.320 She used to work with Erin Pitsy.

01:18:09.700 Oh, I know her.

01:18:10.940 Yeah.

01:18:11.340 She, she, she's now calls herself formerly an MRA and she jumps onto threads and bad mouths, 0.98

01:18:17.660 red pill men.

01:18:18.600 Oh, no way.

01:18:19.400 Yeah.

01:18:19.920 I don't know who she is.

01:18:20.720 Yeah.

01:18:21.920 She doesn't matter, but that's what happens a lot.

01:18:24.680 But there's, there's you, there's Janice Fiamingo, Karen Straugh, and Alison Tiemann.

01:18:28.920 I can count them on one hand of women that actually get into this space and talk about 1.00

01:18:33.980 the stuff that is really impacting men.

01:18:37.240 Most of them that get into this space are really interested in what impacts them.

01:18:41.840 Yeah.

01:18:42.640 Well, I was just curious because, you know, it, I just felt like the first time I heard

01:18:47.560 Kevin Samuels, I was like, I've never heard that point of view before.

01:18:51.060 That's so interesting.

01:18:52.000 I couldn't stop watching.

01:18:53.080 And then it's just like a rabbit hole.

01:18:54.420 You're like, oh, that's what's going on in society.

01:18:58.060 And yeah, I think it's really freeing as a woman, to be honest, because I'd rather like know

01:19:04.600 what's going on and then you can act accordingly.

01:19:07.840 But when they're lying to you, how do you, you can't make a good decision without all the

01:19:12.460 information.

01:19:13.040 And that's what I think is mean about the trad cons is they don't give men the right

01:19:17.180 information.

01:19:18.120 They lie.

01:19:19.320 And that's what I do.

01:19:20.100 They refuse to.

01:19:20.640 They want to avoid the right information.

01:19:23.140 They don't want men having that or thinking about it. 1.00

01:19:27.160 Excuse me.

01:19:28.100 So I was like, even if I had a 1% chance, if I had a 1% chance of getting divorce rates,

01:19:34.380 if I was a girl and I had that, like if I was a guy and I had the same, I had a one out

01:19:38.360 of a hundred.

01:19:39.460 There's a chance that she can steal your children, put you on child support for eight, 1.00

01:19:44.280 like ruin your entire life, call you an abuser.

01:19:46.500 Even if it was just one, I don't think I'd do it.

01:19:50.580 And the fact is that the state puts that gun in every woman's hand. 1.00

01:19:55.520 Whether they use it or not, you don't know, but they have the gun.

01:19:59.320 And a lot of guys are starting to say, I'm not doing the gun.

01:20:04.200 It doesn't matter.

01:20:05.660 I don't need to test her character.

01:20:07.000 I'm not getting involved with somebody that can shoot me at any moment that she gets

01:20:12.160 an urge.

01:20:13.140 And that's what they're dealing with.

01:20:15.400 And these trad cons do not want guys hearing that. 0.99

01:20:19.540 They want to pretend like the gun doesn't exist.

01:20:22.300 Yeah.

01:20:22.560 And I just think it's lying.

01:20:24.120 That's what I don't like.

01:20:24.920 They'll create, and I get frustrated with academics because they'll just, we all know

01:20:29.520 that men, they do not fund men's studies.

01:20:32.400 We all know this.

01:20:33.500 Like, and if you actually were on the ground asking people these questions, I didn't come

01:20:39.320 into this with all the same opinions, but you learn, like, I didn't think marriage was

01:20:43.780 this bad of a deal, but it's like you, you interview 10 men, same story.

01:20:48.240 She stole the kids. 1.00

01:20:49.440 More than half my shit. 1.00

01:20:50.720 I'm on child support for 16 years. 0.99

01:20:52.420 Some of them had a kid that left the country, you know, it's like, you're like, huh, would

01:20:57.700 I sign up for this?

01:20:59.840 I don't, you know, and there's something, I'm sure you've had this, but like when you

01:21:04.100 interview a guy who it's like, it's like he's already dead inside, you know, like that,

01:21:12.160 like some of the guys I've interviewed, if they committed suicide in the next two years,

01:21:15.640 I wouldn't really be surprised because it's like, they just love their children.

01:21:21.300 Like they, they, their children, you could just tell where they're, that was their world.

01:21:25.620 Their family was everything to them.

01:21:28.300 And, you know, one guy I interviewed, it's like he had tears in his eyes and he's saying,

01:21:32.240 my kids are two miles from me and I can't see them.

01:21:34.560 And you guys just say, marry anyway.

01:21:40.480 I just, I can't in good faith, like do that.

01:21:43.840 So for Tim and Andrew and Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson and, and Knowles and the whole crowd, 0.99

01:21:52.720 fix the fucking courts and then sell marriage. 1.00

01:21:57.380 But if you're selling marriage and ignoring what's happening in the courts, it's an evil. 1.00

01:22:03.100 It's an evil.

01:22:05.140 Yeah.

01:22:05.480 It's an evil thing to do.

01:22:07.180 It's like giving somebody an addictive drug or something that's going to harm them,

01:22:11.120 not telling them about the side effects, not acknowledging them.

01:22:14.740 It is evil.

01:22:16.100 And these guys are doing it every day and they're monetizing it.

01:22:19.220 It's horrible in my opinion.

01:22:21.820 Yeah, I agree. 1.00

01:22:22.920 And, and that's what I question if they know, maybe they're just ignorant.

01:22:26.780 I don't know, but it's, I don't think you, you can see what I've seen and what you've

01:22:32.640 seen and what he's seen and push it as a solution.

01:22:37.700 There's, and that was the other thing I, I, I at first thought that, oh, why don't you

01:22:41.960 just, well, obviously you guys were marrying, you know, I would watch fresh and fit and think, 0.99

01:22:45.940 oh, well, they're Miami whores. 1.00

01:22:47.380 Of course they're going to do that. 0.99

01:22:49.140 Until, you know, I even thought back to my childhood, one of my childhood friends, I

01:22:53.620 was like, oh, her dad was enlisted.

01:22:55.120 Wasn't he?

01:22:56.100 And her mom said he was an abuser.

01:22:58.500 I wonder if that was even true.

01:23:01.280 It wasn't.

01:23:02.160 And that was a crazy, I like went back and asked her and she's like, oh no, that was,

01:23:05.260 she was just, she's loony, you know, but it's like the rumor gets out, but the truth doesn't

01:23:10.800 always get around because it doesn't have the same effect.

01:23:13.180 We saw that with Crowder.

01:23:14.620 Truth runs into gynocentrism.

01:23:16.460 It runs into sugar and spice and, oh, can't say that. 0.96

01:23:19.500 I'll say, okay, he's an abuser.

01:23:20.880 That's the easy, simple answer to everything.

01:23:24.840 And I don't see why men do it anymore.

01:23:28.160 And they're increasingly dropping out and I encourage them to.

01:23:31.840 And I get a lot of pushback on that from people that say, oh, don't give up on marriage.

01:23:36.720 It's, you know, it's what has kept the fabric of society together for all these thousands

01:23:42.420 of years is the family unit and the marriage.

01:23:45.700 And we need to preserve that.

01:23:47.220 Well, if you had balls and if you had any interest in the truth, you would preserve

01:23:52.620 that by fixing the family courts, by electing politicians who would fix the family courts.

01:23:58.400 They don't care.

01:24:00.100 They don't care.

01:24:01.120 They got their narrative.

01:24:02.200 Guys are supposed to get married.

01:24:04.060 They're supposed to have families.

01:24:05.340 They're supposed to follow the, whatever religion of choice these people have.

01:24:09.420 And they're just supposed to shut up and obey.

01:24:12.120 And it's like, I don't see how they do that and look at themselves in the mirror.

01:24:15.720 I don't get it, honestly.

01:24:17.860 And I think they're well-intended in some ways, but it's just like, how can you on earth

01:24:23.880 do this?

01:24:24.980 It's just mind-blowing.

01:24:27.280 Well, and it's just the stats.

01:24:30.420 Even if you just look outside, it's not in our favor.

01:24:33.540 I mean, when do you ever walk into a house and it's decorated the way the man wants?

01:24:38.560 Ever.

01:24:39.700 Yours.

01:24:41.880 But that's an exception, doctor.

01:24:43.300 There's a reason, like, you go into a house, it's always live, laugh, love signs. 0.99

01:24:47.320 No guy wants that bullshit in his house. 1.00

01:24:50.720 Oh, no. 1.00

01:24:51.820 No.

01:24:52.080 You know, and I'm like, how many women actually serve their husband? 0.99

01:24:57.520 Like, the way that traditionalists say they're supposed to, you're supposed to be obedient

01:25:01.860 to him in all things.

01:25:03.320 How many of them raise the kids the way he wants?

01:25:05.980 How many of them are in the school system and the parenting style that he wants, the

01:25:10.080 house that he wants, the meals?

01:25:12.280 How many learn his foods that he wants to eat?

01:25:15.220 It's like none.

01:25:16.340 And I'm not saying, if you're not a traditionalist, you want more of a partnership type.

01:25:20.080 I'm not against that either.

01:25:22.540 But what's interesting is that I think that the partnership, what sort of what I've arranged

01:25:27.900 in my life is really the tradition that I like.

01:25:31.240 It is a tradition.

01:25:32.860 Women working and contributing and carrying responsibility and having authority and responsibilities

01:25:41.220 in the home, that was the traditional arrangement for thousands of years.

01:25:46.440 That didn't end until romantic chivalry entered the picture.

01:25:51.800 And it started eroding that relationship.

01:25:55.400 And now it's like, well, Your Honor, he slapped me once.

01:25:59.220 No, I didn't call the police or judges.

01:26:01.700 Boom.

01:26:02.340 Give her all the money. 0.98

01:26:03.600 Talk to one guy. 0.99

01:26:04.500 She said he raped her the first time they hooked up 13 years ago. 0.90

01:26:09.260 And then they had two kids out. 0.88

01:26:10.700 It was either one or two kids.

01:26:13.320 Really?

01:26:13.980 Why would you keep?

01:26:15.280 It doesn't really. 0.57

01:26:16.420 So she had children with her rapist. 0.91

01:26:19.760 Okay. 0.93

01:26:20.620 Yeah, sure.

01:26:21.660 Why not?

01:26:22.860 Maybe he was saved.

01:26:26.400 I'm like, um, and he showed, they show you the court documents to a lot of these guys.

01:26:32.060 And everyone keeps saying, oh, that's just an anecdote.

01:26:34.360 But I'm like, how many states do I have to go in?

01:26:36.840 I want to do, I'm probably going to do a video while I'm here.

01:26:39.300 That says, change my mind.

01:26:40.840 You can legally kidnap a child.

01:26:42.780 I bet you I'll just, I'll get men left and right that sit down. 0.67

01:26:46.360 It won't even, it's like every other guy.

01:26:49.500 They're not going to try to change your mind.

01:26:51.280 Yeah, no.

01:26:51.940 Well, maybe a woman might. 1.00

01:26:53.480 We'll see.

01:26:53.820 Oh, yes, because all those guys are just anecdotes.

01:26:58.140 I mean, anything that doesn't fit the narrative.

01:27:00.220 I mean, you've got a narrative that is so ingrained, the romantic narrative in people's minds,

01:27:07.860 that they lose their minds over it.

01:27:11.160 You can't have an honest discussion about child abduction because of the narrative.

01:27:15.900 You can't have an honest discussion about family courts or about the nature of divorce or what actually happens in them.

01:27:22.760 You can't talk about women's nature, honestly, what women are like, or even what men are like, for that matter.

01:27:29.720 You can't have an honest discussion about any of it.

01:27:32.800 So everything has to be lied about when romantic chivalry is the model.

01:27:38.480 So you really put all of this back down to romantic chivalry.

01:27:42.960 I do.

01:27:43.640 Really?

01:27:44.300 Yes, I do.

01:27:45.260 I think when you've got a servile model for men. 1.00

01:27:49.240 Oh, because it's a servile.

01:27:50.500 Okay, sorry.

01:27:51.360 Sorry, keep going.

01:27:52.560 This crazy sort of everything is about the woman. 1.00

01:27:56.220 Everything is about her happiness, her needs, her ambitions, her wants, her desires.

01:28:00.940 Everything is about her.

01:28:02.980 Nothing is about him. 0.74

01:28:04.540 That is a sick model, fundamentally. 0.97

01:28:06.940 It's very sick. 0.97

01:28:08.020 It's very destructive.

01:28:09.660 How can a guy maintain, how can a man maintain self-respect doing that?

01:28:14.420 The answer is he can't.

01:28:16.560 So he has to stuff that and then stuff everything else.

01:28:20.200 And he ends up bitter and angry and resentful and I think self-loathing at times.

01:28:28.560 How can you have a functional society?

01:28:31.300 We're finding out now, finally.

01:28:33.220 It's only, it's taken, it was in the 1800s before we really had the romantic model take

01:28:42.060 over marriage in the West and we've done nothing but decline ever since.

01:28:47.060 It doesn't work.

01:28:49.300 And then when you add the courts to that equation, and the courts are in the romantic chivalry model.

01:28:57.540 The guy's got to provide no matter what.

01:29:00.200 I don't care if she's got $10 million and you make $30,000 a year, we're going to take half of it and give it to her. 1.00

01:29:06.720 That's what they do.

01:29:09.440 As long as we're operating like that, we can't expect that things get better.

01:29:13.380 And I don't think relationships between the sexes are going to get better. 0.96

01:29:17.060 Yeah.

01:29:17.360 And you can work from home now, too.

01:29:19.520 So I'm like, what is it?

01:29:20.060 Oh, my God.

01:29:20.620 You can do all things.

01:29:21.020 I used to have like a call center, like I would do a call center job and pay it like, I think over 20, like 22 to 25 an hour.

01:29:29.800 This was like five years ago before inflation.

01:29:32.200 Yep.

01:29:32.800 I mean, it's not bad, you know.

01:29:34.580 You can do that five hours a day.

01:29:36.140 Yes, you can.

01:29:37.280 Well, but a real man wouldn't let you do that.

01:29:42.380 A real man would take care of you to a level you didn't need to do that.

01:29:45.720 Is that that hard?

01:29:47.380 It's like not hard.

01:29:48.700 Well, it's not a matter of that.

01:29:50.600 It's just unfair.

01:29:51.700 You can't expect women to work and help with money. 1.00

01:29:55.600 They used to like basket weave, didn't they?

01:29:57.540 I think we already covered that Oprah comes on it, too.

01:30:01.000 I mean, what are you going to do?

01:30:03.520 You can't work through that.

01:30:05.900 But this is what men believe is the way things are supposed to be done, most of them.

01:30:12.840 And so a thousand years ago, what was she doing?

01:30:15.580 I'm just curious, like what would the average wife do? 1.00

01:30:18.760 Well, all kinds of things.

01:30:21.220 I mean, you can look at scripture in the Bible, not to get religious about it, but there's

01:30:26.720 all kinds of stuff in Proverbs 31 about duties of wives.

01:30:31.620 And they had to make money for the family.

01:30:34.460 They had to do all kinds of responsibilities.

01:30:36.840 Women, there wasn't, we didn't have a push-button world. 1.00

01:30:41.420 I mean, it was rough.

01:30:43.580 And your lives were short and hard.

01:30:45.880 And women had to put their shoulder to the wheel just like men. 1.00

01:30:49.520 And romantic chivalry dictated, oh, woman's shoulder to the wheel. 0.99

01:30:53.800 No, not to my wife.

01:30:55.640 Oh, because he's serving her now.

01:30:58.260 Yes.

01:30:58.940 Right.

01:30:59.320 It's his shoulder that belongs on the wheel, not hers. 0.91

01:31:02.160 Not both of you.

01:31:02.960 Because really, traditionalism is about the family.

01:31:05.780 So you'd be working for the family.

01:31:07.860 And now you're, it's he's working for the family, not both of you together.

01:31:12.020 The real traditionalism, the traditionalism that came from, you know, 200,000 years of human

01:31:17.900 existence that led to the Middle Ages up to the point that we got romantic chivalry, the

01:31:23.380 tradition was two working, obligated, responsible people.

01:31:29.860 Romantic chivalry flipped that completely and gave women basically time to think of things 0.99

01:31:37.700 to complain about.

01:31:41.520 That's true.

01:31:42.460 And they did.

01:31:43.320 Yeah, they did.

01:31:45.180 And they still are.

01:31:46.400 So they say that an idle mind is the devil's playground.

01:31:49.540 I think that's what's happened to us is we just have too much time.

01:31:52.880 So we just have time to complain.

01:31:54.860 There's never a plan.

01:31:55.940 Even there is this woman's leadership conference. 1.00

01:31:58.900 And I tweeted, I said, conservative women aren't conservative. 1.00

01:32:02.960 Why do you think women should lead? 1.00

01:32:07.500 And did you get a straight answer?

01:32:09.360 Yeah, well, they said, well, this is we're speaking out about IVF, about, you know, child

01:32:16.100 daycare, da, da, da, da, da.

01:32:17.460 And I'm like, well, speaking out isn't a plan, you know?

01:32:20.940 I mean, I'm not saying it's wrong per se, but I'm like, plan anything?

01:32:25.100 But that's all we do.

01:32:26.040 We just complain.

01:32:27.000 Speaking out is a plan when you've actually got something to say.

01:32:30.620 Yeah.

01:32:30.920 I think that speaking about men's issues out loud is a plan because you're disrupting the 0.99

01:32:38.020 narrative, you're making people think, and it is persuading them.

01:32:42.280 It's actually changing minds.

01:32:44.700 Girl power. 0.99

01:32:45.480 Whose mind is girl power going to change? 1.00

01:32:49.140 Wow.

01:32:49.600 I mean, what provocative, cutting-edge social chains is there for girl power or women in 1.00

01:32:56.760 leadership?

01:32:59.540 Red pill women, now that, that would be speaking to effect and to purpose, which is what you 1.00

01:33:07.140 do.

01:33:07.380 I think it's great.

01:33:08.360 Yeah.

01:33:09.140 And yes, I get called a simp every once in a while because I support your work.

01:33:12.580 That's okay.

01:33:13.380 I can handle it, guys.

01:33:14.900 Call me a simp.

01:33:16.360 Well, yeah, I don't know.

01:33:18.640 I just, I think most conservative women aren't really conservative because they talk about, 1.00

01:33:22.960 they don't talk about what they're conserving and they don't, if you're really going to

01:33:27.160 go back to what the Bible teaches, it's obedience to your husband in all things.

01:33:33.120 And those are the same women that say, I can only be obedient to him if he's obedient to 0.84

01:33:36.680 God.

01:33:37.080 Well, who dictates that?

01:33:38.360 It's always the woman. 1.00

01:33:39.260 And she decides whether he's obedient to God.

01:33:41.520 Of course.

01:33:41.980 So, I define the red pill as men getting together and sharing notes on sexual and dating strategy.

01:33:48.660 Do you agree with that description or do you think the red pill is more than sexual

01:33:52.540 and dating strategy?

01:33:53.860 I think it's been convoluted by the PUA community.

01:33:58.320 Originally, the red pill was about more MGTOW type stuff.

01:34:03.280 I think you've got guys out there, Rolo was one of them that turns it into how to stay.

01:34:13.540 He's my biggest fan.

01:34:14.180 Yeah.

01:34:14.540 Oh, yeah.

01:34:15.000 Mine, too.

01:34:16.420 Rolo's great about telling guys how to stay on a hamster wheel to keep their wife happy. 1.00

01:34:21.260 Is that how you view it?

01:34:22.700 Like a hamster wheel?

01:34:23.820 I think the whole thing of romantic chivalry puts men on a hamster wheel.

01:34:30.020 Oh, because that's still trying to appease her. 0.93

01:34:33.100 Which makes Rolo about as red pill as your average feminist in my book. 1.00

01:34:39.220 Okay.

01:34:39.580 Not red pill.

01:34:40.660 Just another way to repackage chivalry and sort of go in some red pill jargon.

01:34:48.800 But ultimately, it's about you're going to maintain her attraction to you for 50 years

01:34:54.220 and she's always going to be thirsty for you.

01:34:57.440 And that sort of just is like, remember the old ads were on the back of comic books where

01:35:02.340 a guy gets sand kicked in his face on the beach and he sends off with a He-Man packet

01:35:07.020 and next scene in the cartoon, he's muscled up kicking sand in the guy's face and getting

01:35:13.180 his revenge.

01:35:14.160 That's Rolo's work to me.

01:35:16.980 It's not red pill.

01:35:18.800 And it's because it goes, it's still putting romantic, it's still appeasing romantic chivalry.

01:35:26.820 Absolutely.

01:35:27.580 Because that's, a lot of it uses PUA type stuff.

01:35:31.300 I think the way he would view it is it's like a tool set, right?

01:35:35.520 Probably, yeah.

01:35:36.400 But you would say that it's like a bad tool set or what do you?

01:35:40.140 I think it's a terrible tool. 1.00

01:35:41.640 Life on a hamster wheel is stupid. 1.00

01:35:44.080 Okay. 1.00

01:35:44.440 It's a stupid way to go. 1.00

01:35:45.540 It's just not very bright. 1.00

01:35:46.660 Because you're always trying to appease the women. 1.00

01:35:49.160 You're people pleasing and you're behaving trying to get somebody else to care about you.

01:35:56.780 And if you've got to get on a hamster wheel to feel cared about, I would just challenge

01:36:05.220 any guy to think about that for a little bit if that's what he really wants.

01:36:09.700 I think the red pill now and always was about self-discovery.

01:36:16.120 Who am I away from women? 1.00

01:36:18.040 You know, what are my values?

01:36:20.360 Am I going to live by them?

01:36:21.740 That sort of thing.

01:36:23.240 And having the courage and the information to assert that in life, to tell people, you

01:36:30.800 know something?

01:36:32.020 I don't rescue women from their own mistakes. 0.96

01:36:37.560 I don't believe you should.

01:36:38.820 I think they need to face consequences for what they do because that's their only hope

01:36:43.080 of learning anything and separating yourself from the whole gynocentric, romantic, chivalry 0.99

01:36:50.420 claptrap that people find themselves in.

01:36:54.360 I don't think it's about dating strategy.

01:37:00.160 Men have been doing dating strategy forever.

01:37:05.720 All men have different strategies trying to get women to like them.

01:37:09.760 And if your idea of red pill is trying to get a woman in bed, I think you're missing 1.00

01:37:14.260 the point of the red pill entirely.

01:37:17.140 Your blue pill, when you're, how do I, what hoops do I jump through to get her to like 0.56

01:37:23.000 me?

01:37:23.460 That's very blue pill.

01:37:26.120 How about liking yourself?

01:37:27.700 And if she does great, and if she doesn't, she can, you can, you can go next.

01:37:32.120 Right.

01:37:33.020 Huh.

01:37:33.700 I've never thought about it like that.

01:37:35.100 That's really interesting.

01:37:35.900 Because, wow, I didn't, I've never thought about how that ties into romantic chivalry.

01:37:43.560 That's like a really good point because it goes back to the romantic model instead of

01:37:48.860 what would you say?

01:37:49.820 Like, because I guess my question would be, what do guys, what are guys supposed to do

01:37:54.300 in a way?

01:37:54.840 Cause they still have to date in this modern age.

01:37:57.140 You know, it's not like, you know, a lot of them aren't.

01:38:00.720 Well, I guess, um, arranged marriages aren't coming back.

01:38:05.140 So if a guy wants like a relationship with women, like what is, what is he?

01:38:09.480 Well, I think he's, he's good.

01:38:12.120 If he, if he approaches relationships with women as a, I say ABS, always be screening.

01:38:19.520 If the attitude is, how do I get next to women that are decent? 1.00

01:38:23.820 Instead of how do I get next to a woman who will have sex with me, which is most guys 1.00

01:38:30.320 I mean, too, true to the cliche. 0.89

01:38:32.780 They're like, oh man, she's hot. 1.00

01:38:34.400 She's got a nice ass. 1.00

01:38:35.400 I want to get her in bed. 1.00

01:38:36.780 What do I need to say?

01:38:38.040 Where do I spend my money?

01:38:39.280 What do I do?

01:38:40.660 And of course that is simping.

01:38:42.460 That it's romantic chivalry in practice.

01:38:45.540 He's already gearing up to be on his knee with a diamond in his hand by approaching the

01:38:50.720 relationship like that to begin with.

01:38:52.400 I just say, man, focus on your self-respect.

01:38:57.560 Find out who you are.

01:38:59.780 There will be somebody out there.

01:39:01.480 I believe that and call me idealistic.

01:39:03.660 I found somebody. 0.99

01:39:04.700 I think anybody can, but you have to close the door on bullshit, this romantic chivalry. 0.96

01:39:12.280 And there are women out there that are open to the message. 0.97

01:39:16.180 How many times have you heard a woman say, that guy bought me dinner and then he thought 0.98

01:39:20.880 I owed him sex? 0.98

01:39:21.840 Well, pay for your own dinner. 0.99

01:39:26.100 Then you don't have to worry about that. 1.00

01:39:27.880 You've got an asshole like that on every corner. 1.00

01:39:30.720 Those guys are real. 1.00

01:39:31.920 They exist.

01:39:33.080 So don't let them buy your dinner.

01:39:36.480 Yeah.

01:39:36.780 Well, you don't have to accept dinner.

01:39:38.520 You can just suggest like coffee.

01:39:39.940 Yeah, or anything.

01:39:43.080 Or you can suggest sex. 0.72

01:39:47.280 Okay. 0.74

01:39:48.600 And that's okay.

01:39:49.640 But no, I really think this whole thing, men are visually oriented.

01:39:53.560 They see a woman.

01:39:54.440 Yeah.

01:39:54.740 And then the gears start turning.

01:39:58.280 And they're all about romantic chivalry.

01:40:00.760 Even when the guy's totally unconscious of it.

01:40:02.740 How do I please her?

01:40:03.580 How do I make her happy?

01:40:04.900 I got to be the right thing.

01:40:06.380 I got to.

01:40:06.860 You get lost doing that.

01:40:09.800 I hear women all the time saying, I lost myself in a relationship. 1.00

01:40:13.140 And I'm like, bullshit. 1.00

01:40:15.380 Men lose themselves in relationships. 1.00

01:40:18.060 Right.

01:40:18.500 And they end up lonely and devastated.

01:40:22.320 And when she leaves, their lives are the most empty thing in the world.

01:40:27.800 Well, why would you want to be with a guy that lets you act anyway?

01:40:32.120 And they don't.

01:40:32.760 They lose respect for those guys.

01:40:34.760 It's enjoyable at first.

01:40:36.280 It's really enjoyable while there's an infatuation going on.

01:40:40.340 There's a flood of oxytocin and other neurochemicals that make a person feel good.

01:40:44.920 That behavior feels great then to both people.

01:40:48.500 But that neurochemical flood subsides and goes away.

01:40:53.440 And then you're left with, I'm jumping through hoops.

01:40:57.080 Right.

01:40:58.260 And she's like, he's not jumping through hoops anymore.

01:41:02.920 Yeah.

01:41:04.520 What age do you think men, do men ever wake up?

01:41:08.720 And if so, what age do they tend to wake up?

01:41:11.100 50.

01:41:12.260 50?

01:41:13.160 55, maybe.

01:41:14.860 That old.

01:41:15.820 Wow.

01:41:16.040 It was post-50 for, well, fully waking up.

01:41:20.700 I woke up partially in 93 reading Farrell's book and getting involved in this stuff.

01:41:27.220 But the real red pill lessons didn't sink in for me until late 40s, early 50s.

01:41:33.000 That's when it really started gelling.

01:41:35.760 And it's like, that sounds unfortunate because, you know, you don't get that in your youth.

01:41:40.580 But it's actually a really good time in life.

01:41:42.960 It's not bad at all.

01:41:44.080 It's a wonderful time to really come into who you are, to discover what your own values are,

01:41:50.080 what your own desires are, and to make a commitment.

01:41:53.120 If you want to share life with somebody, to find somebody that gets on that train with

01:41:57.160 you.

01:41:57.860 But getting on her train is a death sentence every time for men. 0.53

01:42:02.940 And that is the thing they have the most trouble learning.

01:42:07.140 Never let a woman lead a relationship. 1.00

01:42:10.140 We don't like to either.

01:42:11.780 No.

01:42:11.920 We don't, we don't even know we don't like to, but it's, and it's, but you know, you

01:42:16.420 don't respect a guy that lets it happen.

01:42:18.500 I don't think most women can identify it.

01:42:20.700 I think women, it's like, um, we might feel it if that makes sense.

01:42:26.140 Like, cause I'll, I'll hear women. 1.00

01:42:27.480 I watch women's tick tocks a lot and I'll use them as like examples for my shows and 1.00

01:42:32.300 like what she's saying.

01:42:33.580 And I think women, we rationalize things that don't even make sense. 1.00

01:42:37.520 So maybe the outcome will be like something eventually, but I don't, I don't think a lot

01:42:42.660 of chicks see it coming. 1.00

01:42:43.700 I don't think women like think about getting on a guy's program. 1.00

01:42:47.120 We think about what we want.

01:42:48.680 And I think, yeah, I think it's all sort of automatic.

01:42:51.840 It's not very thoughtful, but in the end, when guys turn over the reins of a relationship

01:42:58.760 to a woman, it's over at that moment.

01:43:02.040 They can, they should leave then because it's only going to hurt more further down the

01:43:07.380 road when they spend the time trying to get the reins back with feeble attempts.

01:43:11.820 It doesn't work.

01:43:13.180 The first time she gets control of the relationship, it's over.

01:43:17.440 So there is a lot of debate about which relationship model works best for couples, traditional, a

01:43:23.880 traditional one, modern or something in between.

01:43:26.360 I don't think we'll be reviving traditional relationships anytime soon.

01:43:30.560 So that leaves me wondering what might work now while we're waiting for the return of

01:43:35.760 a more sane society of the future.

01:43:38.780 Luck.

01:43:42.280 Good luck.

01:43:44.060 Well, I don't think there's a formula for what works.

01:43:46.420 People are different.

01:43:47.720 You know, a traditional relationship in terms of what I call modern traditionalism, the romantic

01:43:54.160 chivalry.

01:43:54.760 For some people that might work, it has a real high divorce rate and a real high acrimony rate. 1.00

01:44:03.480 Romantic?

01:44:04.280 Wait, say that again?

01:44:05.640 Romantic relationships are embittered by nature.

01:44:10.960 Like I said, anytime a guy is in a position that he's basically her butler, not her man, he's

01:44:18.920 going to end up resentful in that.

01:44:21.000 And I've seen it over and over again in sessions with men, guys finally realizing how angry they

01:44:27.800 were, not even knowing just how pissed off they've been for years at all the abuse and

01:44:35.480 everything that happened in the relationship.

01:44:38.420 But I think that what works for people is values.

01:44:43.020 If you've got values and you lead with them, you've got a good shot.

01:44:47.600 What type of values?

01:44:48.860 Can I have some examples?

01:44:51.000 Accountability is a value.

01:44:54.240 I mean, I struggled with my partner for years.

01:44:57.000 And I mean, I've had my own struggles, especially when I was younger with accountability.

01:45:01.240 It's a bear for everybody.

01:45:04.660 But she was not used to a man that would not let her off at all.

01:45:09.620 I mean, and I didn't give an inch of slack on anything.

01:45:13.300 Can I have an example of maybe like a specific instance maybe from early on?

01:45:18.340 Oh, little moments here and there of sort of casual disrespect, a little snide remark,

01:45:25.000 this sort of thing.

01:45:26.840 I made a commitment to myself before I got involved for what I wanted to be a long-term

01:45:31.880 relationship.

01:45:32.640 I wasn't putting up with any of that.

01:45:34.060 I didn't care if it was a grocery store, restaurant, whatever.

01:45:36.940 You talk to me with disrespect, you're going to get dressed down every time that it happens.

01:45:42.260 I don't care if it's slight, no slack whatsoever, and I'm not going to let it go until you own

01:45:47.300 it, period.

01:45:49.340 And if you don't like that, enjoy your life.

01:45:52.580 No hard feelings.

01:45:54.280 But that's the way it is.

01:45:55.840 That, I think, is really important, especially for men to understand.

01:46:01.760 Men, their biggest crippling factor for men is that they run on the delusion that if I treat

01:46:08.300 you a particular way, she'll treat me back with the same way.

01:46:11.640 If I love her this way romantically, she's going to give that back.

01:46:15.300 It doesn't work.

01:46:16.260 If I respect her, she's going to respect me.

01:46:18.820 It doesn't work that way.

01:46:19.880 But you have to command respect with everybody.

01:46:25.840 I won't let anybody disrespect me.

01:46:28.140 I don't care who they are.

01:46:29.440 It makes no difference.

01:46:31.900 I fired clients for disrespecting me.

01:46:35.340 Wait, what did they do?

01:46:37.220 Just not wanting to face the truth and then blaming me for challenging them.

01:46:44.840 That's so funny.

01:46:46.120 Goodbye. 1.00

01:46:46.380 And so rather than grab a hold of what was happening, it's like, oh, you suck. 0.99

01:46:53.240 Okay, see ya. 0.99

01:46:56.700 Wow.

01:46:57.480 Yeah, no, I think, I don't know.

01:47:01.020 Men have just been trained from such a young age to accept complete disrespect.

01:47:05.960 And women do it in the sneakiest, like most snide ways, where even in the debates I've 1.00

01:47:11.800 done, I'm like, what did she just say, you know?

01:47:14.580 Oh, yeah, the passive aggressive stuff.

01:47:17.700 I'll pray for you.

01:47:18.720 That's my, I hate that one.

01:47:20.060 You know what that is? 1.00

01:47:20.840 That's fuck you. 1.00

01:47:21.680 Yeah, I want them to take their prayers and shove them up their ass. 1.00

01:47:24.440 I don't want their prayers. 1.00

01:47:26.100 It's like, I'll pray for you means I'm condescending towards you. 1.00

01:47:29.460 And I think you're a piece of shit or whatever. 1.00

01:47:32.360 And just the idea of, say, I'm going to cloak all that stuff in prayer, in a statement about 1.00

01:47:40.820 prayer, it's like, oh, yeah, you're real deep.

01:47:45.000 Like, I heard something.

01:47:46.300 I pray for my enemies.

01:47:47.760 Do you?

01:47:48.120 I do sometimes.

01:47:52.040 I mean, I do.

01:47:53.680 Yeah.

01:47:55.240 I don't let my enemies treat me with disrespect, though.

01:47:58.360 Yeah.

01:47:59.040 Or anybody else.

01:48:00.680 But it's like, why do they have to tell you that?

01:48:03.440 Well, again, I don't think they're saying that.

01:48:05.700 Yeah. 1.00

01:48:05.880 I think they're saying, I'm a Christian, so I can't say fuck you. 1.00

01:48:08.760 So I'll say I'll pray for you. 1.00

01:48:10.020 That was the biggest red pill was when I realized that all these Christian women. 1.00

01:48:13.900 And, you know, I noticed it from the time I was young, but I couldn't articulate what

01:48:17.940 it was.

01:48:18.900 But a lot of them only use religion as a way to look good, not be good.

01:48:23.460 Yep.

01:48:23.600 So if you're a Christian, I should be able to tell by your actions, not by you saying 0.89

01:48:29.320 that you're a Christian.

01:48:30.480 I should be able to tell just by the way you treat people.

01:48:33.760 And you can.

01:48:35.860 And again, for me, this goes back to the onus being on men for their decisions.

01:48:41.760 They don't hide this stuff.

01:48:43.200 I mean, if you are any way cognizant of what's going on with people, they would look at that

01:48:50.460 woman saying, I'll pray for you.

01:48:51.800 And they know what it means.

01:48:53.520 That it doesn't mean she's not going to pray for you.

01:48:58.760 She might pray for something bad to happen to you, but she's not going to pray for you.

01:49:03.840 That was just an insult.

01:49:05.380 And there are a million guys out there who would say, well, but she said she was going 0.94

01:49:12.920 to pray for you.

01:49:15.600 What do you do with those guys?

01:49:16.840 She said she quit porn.

01:49:18.180 Yeah, she did before she raised her prices. 1.00

01:49:21.200 What's worse, a simp or a whore? 1.00

01:49:24.220 Simp. 1.00

01:49:26.300 Every time.

01:49:27.560 A simp. 1.00

01:49:28.840 Whores are acting like whores because they get encouraged to. 1.00

01:49:32.480 They're raised, nothing they can do is wrong. 0.99

01:49:37.420 They can't be chastised.

01:49:39.060 They can't be corrected.

01:49:41.560 Men are raised to be more responsible than that.

01:49:45.040 So I put the onus on them. 1.00

01:49:47.600 A whore I can get rid of in two minutes. 1.00

01:49:51.000 I'll know she's a whore in two minutes and I can be gone. 1.00

01:49:54.140 A guy reveals his simping by opportunity. 0.99

01:50:00.600 So you have to sort of wait and watch it because all guys will talk tough about, well, I wouldn't

01:50:05.740 take that from a woman. 1.00

01:50:07.680 Is she listening?

01:50:10.060 I've seen that a million times.

01:50:13.740 So for me, simping.

01:50:16.120 Do you think there's any point in long-term relationships today?

01:50:19.640 Yeah, I think I've had the benefits of a long-term relationship myself, many of which I would

01:50:27.740 even find hard to articulate, but it's good.

01:50:31.260 It's been an absolute asset in my life, a lifesaver in many ways.

01:50:37.520 I wouldn't trade it for anything.

01:50:39.100 I think there's a point.

01:50:40.160 I think there's a problem, though, in making it happen.

01:50:43.460 And again, I don't want to beat the dead horse anymore, but it goes back to the same fundamental

01:50:49.120 problems.

01:50:50.100 How do you make long-term work when long-term means you're on a hamster wheel and she's 1.00

01:50:56.220 on a cushioned sofa?

01:50:59.100 That doesn't work long-term.

01:51:02.340 You have to find a woman that can understand that and wrap her head around it. 1.00

01:51:07.260 And that isn't easy.

01:51:08.980 You have a website called XY Crew where you schedule regular meetings for men to talk with

01:51:18.920 each other with no women around.

01:51:21.100 How do men act differently when women aren't around? 0.99

01:51:24.120 And how can men join?

01:51:25.940 They're more honest.

01:51:27.180 Now, I've got to say, this group of guys, though, they would probably be extra honest

01:51:31.600 if there was a woman. 1.00

01:51:34.800 It's a little bit different with red pill guys.

01:51:37.220 But the beautiful thing about it is that they really enjoy it.

01:51:42.860 They enjoy the space without women listening because the truth is a dynamic. 1.00

01:51:47.540 You can have a room with 20 guys in it.

01:51:50.380 One woman walks in and the entire dynamic changes in the whole room. 0.88

01:51:54.920 Language changes.

01:51:56.220 Guys start sucking in their bellies and puffing their chest out a little bit more.

01:51:59.980 Again, their posture improves.

01:52:02.040 They're looking around to see if she's looking.

01:52:04.620 I mean, that's what happens.

01:52:05.800 So, we have an environment where there's no woman there. 1.00

01:52:09.540 You guys are relaxed.

01:52:11.300 And it's really great for them to not feel crazy, to be able to talk about what they really

01:52:17.120 think about everything that's going on in their lives.

01:52:21.440 And nobody's trying to tell them to man up.

01:52:24.420 Nobody's shaming them.

01:52:25.940 I heard saying, you shouldn't say it like that.

01:52:27.920 Oh, yes.

01:52:28.640 It wasn't what you said.

01:52:30.220 It's how you said it.

01:52:31.120 But, yeah, another dribble like that.

01:52:34.140 Yeah.

01:52:34.940 Yeah.

01:52:35.120 I said it straight out and honest, which is what you didn't like.

01:52:39.400 I need to remember some of these comebacks.

01:52:41.640 These are funny.

01:52:43.380 Well, you get enough practice.

01:52:44.820 You get a lot of comebacks.

01:52:45.920 Yeah.

01:52:46.280 So, I'm like, that's the, that's the, it's how you said it.

01:52:53.240 Yes, it's how you said it, which is you put one word right after another, which is how

01:52:58.580 people say things.

01:52:59.840 Yeah.

01:53:00.120 And you said what you thought, and you weren't supposed to do it that way.

01:53:04.380 You were supposed to cushion the blow, candy coat it.

01:53:09.820 Yeah.

01:53:10.560 And I'm a firm believer that if you want sugar coated, go to get a donut.

01:53:18.760 Well, thank you very much for coming on today.

01:53:21.160 This has been a pleasure.

01:53:22.180 What do you, what do you think about, I guess, how can people sign up for the, it's called

01:53:29.040 XY Crew? 0.57

01:53:30.400 Yeah, they can go, one thing they can do right now is go to paulelum.com forward slash XY Crew

01:53:36.140 and give you a whole description of what we do.

01:53:38.940 It's basically daily men's group meetings.

01:53:41.960 We're meeting live this year in Southwest Michigan for a week in August.

01:53:48.580 Our get togethers are legend.

01:53:50.960 They're absolutely amazing.

01:53:53.020 We're just a bunch of guys having a party that lasts for a week and enjoying each other's

01:53:58.320 company and feeling heard.

01:54:02.620 It's amazing what that does.

01:54:04.420 What happens to men when you just let them talk and encourage the truth about everything. 0.91

01:54:11.880 It is amazing what happens to them psychologically.

01:54:15.700 It's been a wonder to watch this thing.

01:54:17.700 But yeah, let me say it again, paulelum.com forward slash XY Crew.

01:54:23.020 Well, thank you very much for coming.

01:54:24.420 I've been a fan forever.

01:54:25.680 So it's so nice to meet you.

01:54:26.980 Fan right back at you.

01:54:28.480 Guys, make sure you go subscribe to his channel, sign up for the men's group.

01:54:32.980 And most importantly, like the video on your way out and sign up to the audacitynetwork.com.

01:54:38.000 Get our yearly membership if you can.

01:54:40.400 We are currently demonetized.

01:54:41.860 So signing up for the membership really helps do more of these interviews.

01:54:45.940 Get used to that.

01:54:46.580 Yeah, I know.

01:54:47.540 Freaking A.

01:54:48.360 Like the video.

01:54:49.320 Subscribe.

01:54:49.800 We'll talk to you next time.

01:54:51.860 Thanks.

Pearl - August 16, 2025

The Lie of Love： Paul Elam Exposes Modern Marriage

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