Pearl - January 21, 2025


The Reason FAKE Trad Wifes Target DORKY Guys Is Terrible ｜ Pearl Daily


Episode Stats


Length

21 minutes

Words per minute

193.454

Word count

4,165

Sentence count

336

Harmful content

Misogyny

60

sentences flagged

Toxicity

49

sentences flagged

Hate speech

36

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Trad Wives are a group of women who have been married for a long time and are now in their late 20s and early 30s. They are in their 30's and 40's and are looking for a man with a good amount of experience in their field to become a trad wife. Trad wives have been around the game for a while and have a good idea of what a good one is. They know exactly what to look for in a potential husband and how to get him to be a good man. They have a tendency to use the Bible and shame men for not sleeping with them. They also have the tendency to shame male sexuality.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Now, becoming a trad wife is going to be tough because the men that have been around the players, 0.86
00:00:05.740 the charming men, the men that have the choice are going to know your BS.
00:00:11.240 The men that have choice, they know a rebrand when they see it.
00:00:16.240 So when a woman's going to become a trad wife and she's a former hoe, she's got to pick an easy target. 1.00
00:00:23.160 That's why you'll notice their targets are always dorky guys without a lot of experience.
00:00:27.460 If you ask them how many relationships have they been in, it's usually one, maybe two. 0.84
00:00:32.320 That's called an easy target because, again, the woman, even let's pretend she's a virgin by 25. 1.00
00:00:39.860 The amount of men she's interacted with, dealt with, talked to, her manipulation power.
00:00:46.000 Let's not, like the sexes manipulate each other. 1.00
00:00:48.760 You guys say you're the most beautiful woman in the world.
00:00:51.520 You pretend you don't like us as much as you do to keep us interested.
00:00:55.600 You do the hot and cold.
00:00:57.780 I've seen the dating advice stuff, okay?
00:01:00.720 We do the same thing.
00:01:01.900 We manipulate each other. 0.63
00:01:03.680 Women are just better at it. 1.00
00:01:05.260 Women are just, we're A1 manipulators. 1.00
00:01:07.320 We manipulate through a pound of makeup to get a hotter guy. 0.99
00:01:11.840 There was a guy in a space the other day who came in and said he had a girlfriend of nine months,
00:01:15.580 never saw her without makeup.
00:01:17.540 And then they didn't live together, right?
00:01:20.260 So every time she came in, always had makeup on.
00:01:23.540 And she was so much less attractive when he saw her without makeup, he just didn't know what to do.
00:01:28.540 So the trad wives, usually they'll do one of three things. 1.00
00:01:31.980 They go for a man about their age because, again, a woman, late 20s, mid 20s, early 30s, 0.98
00:01:38.560 way more experienced than the man.
00:01:40.800 And she's going to run that relationship. 0.99
00:01:43.620 She's going to give up nothing to be a trad wife. 1.00
00:01:45.840 She might be an influencer, build a trad wife persona on the internet. 1.00
00:01:51.540 And anything that she wants to do, God is going to be calling her to do it.
00:01:56.100 So she's going to say God wants her to have a platform.
00:01:59.540 She's going to say God wants me to put the kids in this school.
00:02:03.380 That's like a form of manipulation.
00:02:05.460 They have a tendency to use God.
00:02:07.260 They also have a tendency to shame male behavior.
00:02:10.300 And even though they're not perfect either, right?
00:02:12.860 You know, they're getting married late 20s.
00:02:15.660 There's something there, right?
00:02:17.080 So they have a tendency to use the Bible to shame any behavior they don't like from the man.
00:02:23.540 So a common thing I hear from the trad wives is that all the men just aren't holy enough. 0.93
00:02:28.420 He's not leading me to God.
00:02:30.180 And it's like a worse form of manipulation because you're using God to get what you want and manipulate.
00:02:36.760 It's just, it's like you respect the player.
00:02:39.000 I respect the player more, the tinder swindler who got all that money out of the women. 1.00
00:02:44.540 I really respect him more than the trad wives using God to manipulate their husband. 1.00
00:02:50.000 The tinder swindler, at least you can be impressed. 1.00
00:02:53.120 That's hard to do.
00:02:54.260 Now, the thing is these trad wives, they don't know the alpha and beta traits, right? 1.00
00:02:59.180 So oftentimes they marry a beta guy, unfortunately. 0.55
00:03:02.820 Or a guy they see as beta based on the men that they've dated before.
00:03:06.440 They don't know that they don't like him.
00:03:08.980 You know, they, it's not like these women go in wanting to divorce their husband, but they need a kid. 0.99
00:03:15.440 They need a kid. 0.99
00:03:16.560 They got to get married.
00:03:18.140 So they have to do our hamster reel, convince ourselves we like him.
00:03:22.520 The problem is that kid gets born.
00:03:24.760 Postpartum depression is post-nut clarity for women. 0.99
00:03:28.060 Haven't you guys ever really thought you liked a woman that had sex with her and realized you just wanted a blowjob? 0.98
00:03:33.440 Women have that same thing with children. 1.00
00:03:37.160 They think they like the man.
00:03:38.940 That's why a lot of times the sexless marriages happen after the kid. 1.00
00:03:43.100 Now, these women also have a tendency to shame male sexuality. 1.00
00:03:47.740 So they have no problem not sleeping with their husbands. 1.00
00:03:51.320 And they will shame men for trying and also shame them for watching porn.
00:03:55.980 Now, we all know how strong the male need for variety is.
00:03:59.740 There's a reason that, you know, in a way this is just nature correcting itself.
00:04:04.780 Because historically, eight women reproduced for one man. 0.98
00:04:08.620 Eight.
00:04:09.460 So the sexless men, the women sleeping with the same men, this is just nature kind of taking its course, right? 0.90
00:04:16.360 But what they'll do is they don't really want to have sex with him.
00:04:19.300 But they also don't want to lose their resources and their husband going elsewhere. 0.96
00:04:23.440 So they shame the porn.
00:04:24.880 They act like porn is the root of all evil in society.
00:04:28.160 I mean, 70% of men watch porn, admittedly, in the last month.
00:04:33.120 I don't know.
00:04:33.540 Society's running okay. 0.99
00:04:35.000 And I think most men would give it up if they had a bunch of women that wanted to have sex with them. 1.00
00:04:40.000 I know what they say. 0.82
00:04:41.640 To me, I think women just don't like losing the power. 1.00
00:04:44.840 Because they can't manipulate the guys as much if they have another outlet, another form.
00:04:49.700 They will also shame men that are players who are exploring their options.
00:04:53.860 So you guys know, when a man's a player, there's nothing you are going to do to get him to not have sex. 0.77
00:05:00.960 Imagine, imagine thinking that a man that's dating multiple women, having a harem of five women trying to have sex with him all the time. 0.96
00:05:08.720 And you're going to say you're a bad person. 0.69
00:05:11.200 Do you think that man is going to say, oh, you know what?
00:05:14.400 But I am a bad person.
00:05:17.280 So what they'll do is they, the reason they love the players, right?
00:05:22.900 They really do.
00:05:23.600 Because at some point, most women have dated a guy that's more of a player than their husband.
00:05:29.560 Let's just say.
00:05:30.500 Most women do not marry the baddest boy that they've ever dated or the biggest player, whatever. 0.85
00:05:36.320 They hate that they're attracted to the players.
00:05:38.500 They're not attracted to their husband.
00:05:39.800 Because why is, why are these, why are the women yelling at the men for sleeping around, right? 1.00
00:05:47.180 I mean, isn't, you kind of wonder what are you doing there?
00:05:51.260 It's kind of a weird behavior.
00:05:53.040 So they all go on a lot of shows and shame men for exploring their options, even though they did the same thing when they were at their peak.
00:06:00.100 The next thing that the finding religion or spiritual journey does is we should wait till marriage.
00:06:07.760 Making men wait for used goods, the 90-day rule, et cetera.
00:06:12.160 So the women, they're not as hot or innocent as they used to be. 1.00
00:06:15.820 You know, good women will make up for this, right? 1.00
00:06:19.880 You know, good, reasonable women will know, okay, I'm not as attractive as I used to be.
00:06:24.480 And there's different strategies that women take. 1.00
00:06:26.460 We could argue about what strategies are the most effective, right? 0.99
00:06:31.500 But, you know, some women decide they want to give really good blowjobs. 1.00
00:06:36.720 That's how they try to make up for it. 0.97
00:06:38.620 One in the chat if that would help.
00:06:40.120 Other women, they decide, I'm just going to be a nicer person. 1.00
00:06:43.700 I'm going to learn to be more pleasant, nicer. 0.99
00:06:46.360 You know, like fat women. 1.00
00:06:47.440 Fat women used to, they knew they weren't the best, so they made up for it with a really good personality. 1.00
00:06:53.160 So maybe the women go that route. 1.00
00:06:54.640 Other women, you know, I have a friend. 1.00
00:06:55.960 She was older and she ended up getting married to a guy that really doesn't take any shit. 0.98
00:07:01.700 I wouldn't say he's beta at all. 0.99
00:07:03.260 And she did this by, how did she do this?
00:07:06.440 She learned how to code and built him a website for his business.
00:07:10.140 I mean, she learned skills that would make his life easier.
00:07:13.620 She quit her job, worked for him.
00:07:15.480 That's one way to do it.
00:07:16.720 Some women will get in better shape. 1.00
00:07:18.140 You see women in their 30s hitting the gym really, really hard. 1.00
00:07:20.940 But the, these women think, no, I don't want to do that. 1.00
00:07:26.840 That's too hard.
00:07:28.060 I would rather just charge a higher price for used goods.
00:07:31.480 You know, I am going to sell.
00:07:33.220 I'm going to sell, you know, because at the end of the day, dating, it is selling, right?
00:07:36.420 Everyone's selling themselves.
00:07:37.660 This is what I have to offer.
00:07:38.820 This is what I have to offer.
00:07:39.720 So what they're going to do is they're going to say, look, I know my ex-boyfriend hit all
00:07:45.460 the time for free.
00:07:46.380 He had to pay nothing.
00:07:47.620 But you, you get to wait until marriage, put all your money on the line.
00:07:53.280 Give me the power to destroy your legacy and steal your children.
00:07:57.480 And in exchange, you get nothing.
00:07:59.420 You get the promise that I won't leave.
00:08:01.760 They will get a guy to sign up.
00:08:03.940 Probably one of you in the chat that fell for those blue eyes.
00:08:07.060 I know one.
00:08:07.640 I know it's one of you. 1.00
00:08:08.580 I don't know who, but deep down, the woman knows he's an idiot. 1.00
00:08:13.540 It's not a smart move. 1.00
00:08:15.060 So, you know, the next option for the ex-hoes is running back to school. 1.00
00:08:20.360 This is an excessive focus on their career.
00:08:22.900 Generally, it's a graduate degree and a PhD.
00:08:25.820 So they sign up for more debt.
00:08:27.480 They become even more selfish, even though they're already selfish.
00:08:30.800 So they say, I'm focusing on me.
00:08:32.680 Sis, you didn't need to do that.
00:08:34.160 You focused on yourself enough.
00:08:36.620 Here we go for social work.
00:08:38.100 Led me to go back to school for social work.
00:08:40.600 I've actually been wanting to.
00:08:41.920 It's never engineering.
00:08:43.820 Talk about this.
00:08:44.420 It's never like.
00:08:45.420 Long time.
00:08:45.980 Oh my gosh, I need to move this.
00:08:47.400 It's never medicine.
00:08:48.580 It's always something that doesn't make any money.
00:08:51.860 Time about how a heartbreak led me to go back to school for social work.
00:08:56.020 I've actually been wanting to talk about this for a long time, but for some reason, I just
00:08:59.700 never knew where to start.
00:09:01.340 In 2019, I was living in LA with my ex-boyfriend, who I was also working for at the time.
00:09:07.280 And if anyone's watching this who is contemplating working with their significant other, don't.
00:09:12.080 It honestly has nothing to do with why we broke up, but it made the breakup so messy after.
00:09:16.920 I'll never forget the day that started our breakup.
00:09:19.100 He woke up really early, and he went to go play basketball, and we didn't really speak
00:09:22.680 that morning.
00:09:23.100 He kind of just woke up and left.
00:09:24.600 Hours later, I haven't heard from him, so I'm like, hello.
00:09:26.780 All of a sudden, I see in our text that he turned off his location services.
00:09:31.440 I'm like, that's weird.
00:09:33.440 What?
00:09:33.860 I just realized that this story time was supposed to be about why I went back to school for social
00:09:37.580 work, not what happened in our breakup.
00:09:39.480 So long story short, he broke up with me.
00:09:41.880 I was distraught.
00:09:43.280 When I tell you, I have never felt heartbreak like that.
00:09:46.920 Tried for a very long time to just get over it on my own, but I literally could not wake
00:09:51.180 up in the mornings.
00:09:51.820 I was that depressed.
00:09:53.280 So naturally, I'm like, okay, I need help.
00:09:55.360 I found a therapist, and I started seeing her like two times a week, and no joke, she
00:09:59.400 single-handedly changed my life to the point.
00:10:02.240 There's a therapy phase.
00:10:04.160 I want you guys to think about all the people that make money off of us during these phases.
00:10:07.820 The doctors convincing us that we're sick when we're not.
00:10:10.940 Here we go.
00:10:11.660 The therapists convincing us we need therapy and to try to understand our feelings when
00:10:18.140 we don't even...
00:10:20.020 If we can't understand our feelings, I mean, that's an impossible task.
00:10:23.680 I get mad for no reason all the time.
00:10:26.400 I get happy for no reason.
00:10:27.700 I mean, we can't understand that. 0.89
00:10:29.560 Me being like, holy shit, I want to be able to do that for people. 0.95
00:10:32.980 So I took a big risk, applied to a bunch of schools, got in. 0.96
00:10:36.040 Now two years later, I graduate this summer, and the goal is to become a therapist and help
00:10:40.940 people the way that my therapist helps me.
00:10:42.880 It's wild how real rejection is redirection.
00:10:46.040 If I hadn't gotten broken up with, I wouldn't have applied to get my master's in social work.
00:10:50.180 I wouldn't have found Locks Club, which made me realize that I really want to work in the
00:10:54.020 dating and relationship space.
00:10:55.540 I wouldn't have moved to Florida during COVID, met my boyfriend, and I probably wouldn't
00:10:59.320 have started a TikTok.
00:11:00.460 Everything happens for a reason.
00:11:02.360 Rejection is redirection.
00:11:03.740 Next, the false accusation realization.
00:11:07.220 So this is when she realized she consented to none of her hoe activities. 1.00
00:11:11.500 This happens when looks start to fade because their looks can't get them the resources that
00:11:16.720 they used to.
00:11:17.360 They used to get all this free stuff, events, attention thrown at them.
00:11:21.700 They can't get it from that anymore.
00:11:23.340 Have you ever noticed all the false accusation, the Me Too ladies? 1.00
00:11:26.380 It's always after they're hot.
00:11:27.740 They're not hot now.
00:11:29.520 They were hot before. 0.99
00:11:30.740 Then it's the I was dumb, young and dumb justification. 0.99
00:11:34.400 So when men commit a crime when they were young, they say I was wrong. 1.00
00:11:38.700 But women say I was young and dumb. 0.99
00:11:41.460 Everything before post-ho, I was young and dumb. 0.99
00:11:45.200 Then they got to marry a boyfriend or a husband that's a placeholder.
00:11:51.240 So they obviously need a beta with no standards that lets them do whatever they want. 0.51
00:11:55.640 You're the guy she can get fat on.
00:11:57.220 If your woman's getting fat on you, if she's gaining a ton of weight, 1.00
00:12:00.180 she's not afraid of you dumping her.
00:12:02.800 You've instilled no fear.
00:12:04.540 Congratulations, fellas.
00:12:06.160 She wants you to have no standards and zero requirements.
00:12:10.060 Next is divorce.
00:12:12.080 Divorce because you want to be an influencer, go to concerts, or join some sort of community
00:12:19.420 that seems better than your husband.
00:12:22.200 Next, obviously, she's going to raise her standards. 0.51
00:12:24.880 Make men wait longer for sex while offering nothing in return. 0.97
00:12:30.000 So the older they get, the longer that waiting period.
00:12:32.560 You know, it goes from a month phase, two months, three months, give up, have a one night stand,
00:12:37.760 and then she repeats.
00:12:39.340 So again, you know, that's what they always say.
00:12:41.080 I fell into temptation.
00:12:43.120 How do you fall?
00:12:44.580 I don't, did you choose it or did you, was it an accident? 0.53
00:12:47.880 There's a lot of steps in having sex, you know, it starts, I mean, I don't want to get 0.91
00:12:51.720 too detailed, but you guys, you know, there's a lot of steps.
00:12:55.620 There's going back to the place.
00:12:57.640 There, it doesn't usually, it's not just something you fall into.
00:13:00.780 It's a choice, but you know, they won't say that.
00:13:03.280 So, you know, women back in the day used to stay at their parents' house until they found 0.97
00:13:07.500 a husband.
00:13:07.980 They used to learn how to be wives and mothers from their mothers. 1.00
00:13:11.500 When they met the man they were going to marry, they would tailor themselves to fit that man
00:13:15.800 and they would become the woman that he needed her to be.
00:13:19.540 But a woman finding herself as a new phenomenon started by modern women as a way to put off 1.00
00:13:24.880 marriage, children, and any other major life decision.
00:13:27.560 Because again, the goal of feminism is to be able to use our youth on ourselves as much 1.00
00:13:33.860 as we can, find a bailout guy later.
00:13:36.160 If we could, if we had fertility to push off kids till 40, swear we would do it.
00:13:41.220 I swear.
00:13:42.540 Instead of prioritizing becoming a man's wife, we learn how to be disagreeable, disagreeable 0.99
00:13:47.960 and difficult.
00:13:48.740 The quest of a woman finding herself usually leads to the next phase that is the hoe phase. 1.00
00:13:55.000 Now, what is a modern woman's motivation for finding her hoe phase? 1.00
00:13:59.900 You, now this is an article from a feminist website that says you have been so lost and 0.97
00:14:06.400 it's explaining the hoe phase. 0.95
00:14:07.900 It's to the girl who needs to find herself again.
00:14:10.420 You have been so lost in the whirlwind of life that you've tricked yourself into thinking
00:14:14.560 that you're happy until the high ends.
00:14:16.740 Until your friends leave you, leave and you feel all alone, all you hit is rock bottom.
00:14:22.460 You've become someone that you don't recognize, someone you thought you were supposed to be
00:14:26.820 and you don't want to be that girl.
00:14:30.400 You've become that girl that you promised yourself you would never become, that girl who doesn't 1.00
00:14:35.160 know who she is.
00:14:36.340 You tell yourself that you're happy, that you love the life that you live until you're laying
00:14:41.220 in bed at night and it all hits you.
00:14:42.840 Those fundamental questions.
00:14:45.060 What are you even doing with your life?
00:14:46.560 Who are you?
00:14:47.160 Are you satisfied with where you are at?
00:14:48.940 The answer is never, we're never satisfied, never.
00:14:52.560 Are you really happy?
00:14:54.320 And if you can't escape that resounding no, that you feel because you know it's the truth.
00:15:00.220 You've tried to be what everyone else needed instead of what you needed.
00:15:03.720 You've conceded to what you should have fought.
00:15:06.460 You've conceded when you should have fought.
00:15:08.480 You've tried to be who you thought people expected you to be, to please them instead of
00:15:12.580 pleasing yourself.
00:15:13.400 You're so caught up in everything else that you've lost yourself along the way.
00:15:17.020 You've been so desperately trying to fill that void, but nothing you do, nothing you get,
00:15:46.220 or anyone you ever meet seems to be able to fill it.
00:15:48.580 At the end of the day, you feel empty, you feel lost.
00:15:51.300 What are the common actions of a woman finding herself?
00:15:54.020 Usually dated and broke up with a toxic, misogynistic ex.
00:15:59.460 Selfishness, me, me, me in all aspects of life.
00:16:02.080 Spent a ton of money on living, traveling, and material goods.
00:16:06.520 Long-term planning stops.
00:16:08.000 Live in the now until we smash into the wall.
00:16:10.480 Becomes an amateur psychologist. 0.94
00:16:12.100 Will diagnose herself and everyone around her with some sort of mental disorder. 1.00
00:16:16.240 Fully embrace misandrous ideas like men are trash. 1.00
00:16:19.220 Toxic groups of misandrous female friends, etc. 1.00
00:16:23.080 Creative pundits. 0.99
00:16:24.200 Social media content creation.
00:16:25.920 Some sort of creative business.
00:16:27.720 Lack of true self-reflection.
00:16:30.140 Taking herself off the dating market for far too long and rejecting all the good men that
00:16:34.040 come along because she's dealing with her trauma.
00:16:36.700 This woman talks about how she started her healing journey.
00:16:39.980 Of course, she had a toxic ex.
00:16:41.580 How did I start my healing journey?
00:16:43.120 Let's talk about it.
00:16:44.120 I feel like I need to preface this in saying that I was in a very, very unhealthy and toxic
00:16:48.700 relationship at the time.
00:16:50.080 That's another video for another time because that was just a lot.
00:16:52.700 The first step to starting my healing journey was getting comfortable with being alone.
00:16:57.480 I had this work view that having somebody there.
00:16:59.820 So that's taking herself off the dating market for far too long. 0.97
00:17:02.900 Was better than being by myself and that was far from the case.
00:17:05.360 If you disrupt my peace of mind, you got to go.
00:17:07.380 I learned that the hard way, but it was very valuable.
00:17:09.900 I had to unlearn everything that I had learned within that relationship.
00:17:13.760 Had this really warped view of myself.
00:17:16.200 He was telling me I was too skinny. 0.98
00:17:17.840 I need to get a boob job. 1.00
00:17:18.940 I couldn't see myself for who I was and what I had to offer.
00:17:22.220 Now remember, these are the men that can demand that.
00:17:27.260 I'm telling you, I've heard guys.
00:17:29.220 I've heard guys that there's one guy in London I knew.
00:17:33.360 Okay.
00:17:33.640 And he, I don't want to give too many details.
00:17:35.680 I don't want you guys to figure out who does, but he always had a rotation of five women. 0.93
00:17:40.320 Like always, as long as I knew him, his, this is the thing.
00:17:44.580 You would be shocked what women will accept for the right guy. 1.00
00:17:48.240 I mean, and to be fair, this was a good looking guy in good.
00:17:51.380 Like he had all the boxes checked, right?
00:17:53.380 This is very good in his field.
00:17:55.380 I met like three of his girlfriends.
00:17:57.780 He was like friends in our friend group.
00:17:59.880 They always accepted him stepping out.
00:18:03.360 Always, always, always, always.
00:18:04.600 That was, that was like his standard.
00:18:07.520 Okay.
00:18:08.480 And unless you accepted that, you just were not, there was one woman that actually, I think
00:18:14.140 he settled down with, but I'm telling you, she had to go through like a year or two of
00:18:18.500 him doing whatever he wanted.
00:18:20.380 That just was what it was.
00:18:22.460 Now, let me continue.
00:18:23.840 So those guys, when you hear them talk about women and what they like and don't like, they
00:18:30.100 are very critical.
00:18:31.800 Like they are very specific and normal guys, if they're over a certain threshold, it's
00:18:38.100 like, oh, she, that, that's why I do, I do the one to 10 because I hear how these guys
00:18:44.480 think and they will tell you to get a boob job. 1.00
00:18:47.160 I swear to God, they'll do it.
00:18:48.380 I mean, they do not care when he, you think about him.
00:18:51.860 So if he has a girl he likes, she's slightly above, below his attractiveness threshold
00:18:57.420 that he usually goes for.
00:18:59.340 He's going to tell her if she's too skinny, he's going to tell her to lose weight. 0.98
00:19:03.640 He's going to tell her to get a boob job if he wants it, because he's got four of you 1.00
00:19:07.880 lined up. 0.79
00:19:08.740 Not only that, these guys have women from their past that are ready to date them at any
00:19:15.340 time.
00:19:15.540 They could be in a whole marriage if these guys called, they're breaking it off and they're
00:19:21.280 coming back.
00:19:22.180 You, you have no idea the abundance that these guys get.
00:19:25.460 So when a 10 gets with a girl like this, she's cute. 1.00
00:19:30.700 She's not bad looking.
00:19:31.680 Right.
00:19:31.940 But by no means is she the archetype that the men go for.
00:19:38.300 Right.
00:19:38.420 She's cute, not beautiful.
00:19:40.580 They're going to say stuff like that and you're going to, you're going to have to do it.
00:19:44.140 I had to unlearn everything that I had learned within that relationship.
00:19:48.880 I had this really warped view of myself.
00:19:51.460 She was telling me I was too skinny. 0.98
00:19:53.100 I need to get a boob job. 1.00
00:19:54.220 I couldn't see myself for who I was and what I had to offer.
00:19:57.520 It's time to let it go.
00:19:58.580 And learn new ways of thinking that would benefit me, empower me, and help me grow.
00:20:03.160 I usually put makeup on my forehead.
00:20:04.700 I started journaling.
00:20:05.680 That was one of the things that really, really helped me get to the root of who I was, what
00:20:09.920 I loved, how I felt about myself, who I wanted to be.
00:20:13.200 I had to work on finding validation within myself and knowing that what I thought about
00:20:17.660 myself is all that mattered.
00:20:19.020 I started meditating.
00:20:20.000 I started meditating because I needed to really get to the essence of what I was thinking.
00:20:24.820 Being alone with my thoughts was one of the scariest things.
00:20:26.880 I needed to rebuild my mindset and just see myself for who I am, what I had to offer,
00:20:31.620 which was a hell of a lot.
00:20:32.920 I started getting back to me and everything that made me happy.
00:20:35.780 I wanted to feel good all around, so I started working.
00:20:38.640 Okay, you guys are saying she's a five. 0.95
00:20:40.660 You do it.
00:20:41.400 I don't want to hear it.
00:20:42.760 I don't want to hear it.
00:20:45.120 You would do it.
00:20:46.940 I have seen how these things played out.
00:20:49.400 And you know what the other thing?
00:20:50.760 The women that would argue with these guys on the show, I'm not going to say names, 1.00
00:20:55.420 but you guys can put two and two together from these streams.
00:20:59.180 They would throw themselves at the guys that they were arguing with when the cameras were off.
00:21:04.900 That's all I'm going to say.
00:21:06.140 On my mindset, I started working on what I was consuming and was watching things that motivated me.
00:21:11.280 At this point, I'm always working on the relationship I have with myself.
00:21:14.160 My healing journey helped me get back to me.
00:21:16.180 And that's why my book, my journal is called Back to Me.
00:21:19.220 We have to learn to give back to ourselves and nurture ourselves and love ourselves.
00:21:23.260 So, back to me.
00:21:25.020 When men write books, it's about accomplishing something. 0.89
00:21:28.040 When women write books, it's just about finding themselves. 1.00