Pearl - September 20, 2024


The TRUTH About Why Most WOMEN Push For MARRIAGE ｜ Pearl Daily


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 11 minutes

Words per Minute

150.35628

Word Count

10,698

Sentence Count

487

Misogynist Sentences

90

Hate Speech Sentences

81


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Audacity Network and welcome to another
00:00:15.000 episode of Pearl Daily, where I cover this week's treachery, debauchery, and craziness.
00:00:21.200 However, I have been focusing on recently the lessons I learned in a thousand, sorry,
00:00:28.040 in a two years of shows interviewing a thousand women. So today I wanted to go over a couple
00:00:38.160 things I saw on X and talk about the truth about why most women push for marriage and how women 0.77
00:00:47.500 see marriage as an end goal and not being a wife or being marriage worthy. And part of the reason 0.99
00:00:55.300 that women feel like this is because of these freaking simps, guys. This is the problem these 0.91
00:01:02.340 days. It is no wonder you see testosterone levels dropping of men, declining 1% a year.
00:01:09.480 The average testosterone level is half of what it was 50 years ago. This is one of the foundational
00:01:15.680 physiological reasons why society's crumbling and in the state that it's in. These women are 1.00
00:01:21.060 getting away with murder and there is a simp epidemic. Testosterone levels are so low and
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00:02:17.560 on shock.com. That's C-H-O-Q.com. Coupon code PEARL. Boost your testosterone naturally and
00:02:24.300 supercharge your masculinity. Don't be a simp. Okay, guys. So I was on X and as normal or Twitter
00:02:35.260 X, I just, I can't, X is tougher. Before we get into the main story today,
00:02:42.620 I, as you guys know, I came from more of a trad, con, I guess, thought process. I went to 12 years
00:02:52.160 of Catholic school and I used to watch the Daily Wire all the time. And what happened was I was
00:02:59.960 working a sales job in Milwaukee and I decided to go to England to play volleyball. I had a small
00:03:06.200 YouTube channel on the side. It blew up and ended up getting a billion views and I interviewed a
00:03:11.340 thousand people. And the funny thing that happens when you interview a thousand people is you really
00:03:16.920 have to put your worldview to the test. Is what you think true? Because you'll have a panel full
00:03:25.540 of people and you're asking them the same types of questions and you start to notice patterns.
00:03:32.060 and one pattern that I noticed was when I was
00:03:36.540 during the year I was interviewing people or the two years
00:03:42.180 I was working on a divorce documentary and I interviewed men that were victims of divorce
00:03:48.460 grape now if you don't know what divorce grape is I can't say you know that word on YouTube we're
00:03:53.520 trying to stay YouTube friendly it's basically men that got screwed over in divorce many times
00:03:59.540 they had false accusations. Many times they had lost their kids. It had been years since they'd
00:04:05.540 seen them. And once I'd seen this enough times, I knew the patterns to look for, for a woman that was 0.90
00:04:15.960 accusing someone of something when they didn't do it. Because I could just kind of sniff it out.
00:04:25.020 And it would happen often on my show where a woman would say she was abused by her ex-boyfriend.
00:04:29.540 And it got to be so common that it was almost every other show, a woman would casually mention
00:04:35.420 her abusive ex. And in my head, if you're willing to, on a public platform, publicly mention that
00:04:44.200 your ex was abusive, when people know oftentimes who your ex is, I want to make sure you're telling
00:04:50.500 the truth. So I would ask maybe three questions and I would say, okay, tell me specifically what
00:04:56.040 happened. And they're never expecting this because in day-to-day conversations, they just get away
00:05:01.040 with calling men abusive. And so I would ask a couple questions that I would find out that they
00:05:06.860 were not in fact abused. And oftentimes what they do is they expand the definition of abuse. So
00:05:12.900 emotional abuse. So if you get cheated on, were you abused or did you take an L? Serious question
00:05:18.200 for women. Like, is it abuse if you get cheated on? I mean, it's happened to the best of us. 1.00
00:05:23.860 it's unpleasant. I don't prefer it. But I mean, abusive, gaslighting, I think that's pretty,
00:05:36.320 I think that's a little bit extreme. So when Hillary Crowder came out and started when that 1.00
00:05:46.240 ring footage leaked last year, and I've talked about this case a lot. And the reason I keep
00:05:49.980 bringing it up because it was so similar to a lot of the people that I interviewed, the men that
00:05:55.520 were victims of divorce grades. When she had the footage leaked of Crowder yelling at his wife,
00:06:04.200 everyone called it abuse. I knew what was happening because what happens is women always 1.00
00:06:13.240 want to build careers and platforms off of victimhood. And whether it's in their town, 1.00
00:06:19.600 their social circle, reputation destruction is the number one tool of women. That's how we survived 1.00
00:06:25.240 because if we wanted to, we can't physically attack someone. So what do we do? We destroy
00:06:31.820 their reputation. And what, so when I saw her Instagram profile or Twitter profile,
00:06:44.000 we can pull this up, and it said twin mom rebuilding from the rubble.
00:06:49.600 And we later come to find out she was getting $25,000 a month.
00:06:56.720 Was I surprised?
00:06:59.920 I mean, would you guys say rubble?
00:07:02.800 I'm just curious.
00:07:03.920 Thumbs up, thumbs up if rubble is $25,000 a month.
00:07:09.000 Thumbs down if it's not.
00:07:11.280 I'm just asking these questions, okay?
00:07:13.640 So that's how a lot of people wondered, how did I know when everyone else was calling him an abuser?
00:07:18.380 Or how did I know what was happening?
00:07:20.280 Well, you interview 1,000 people, you get some patterns.
00:07:23.600 So she had a tweet go viral.
00:07:26.580 And she said, and I want to just point out, this is another form of reputation destruction.
00:07:31.460 So the logical conclusion is that many of the loudest voices in the manosphere
00:07:37.080 that hold such contempt for women are deeply closeted.
00:07:43.300 That is, they have very little, if any, attraction to women.
00:07:47.980 Even if they never act on it, their true desire is to be with another man. 1.00
00:07:54.040 So when I was interviewing women, I'm going to make, I'm going to hold on, take it on my headphones. 0.99
00:08:01.820 We're going to whiteboard it today, everybody.
00:08:04.940 I just turned this on, right?
00:08:07.440 Okay.
00:08:07.720 so what I would find and I want you guys to put in the chat what else you guys have noticed let
00:08:20.860 me put on the chat so I can see it one second guys all right let me go
00:08:29.840 okay here we go yeah 25k a month is that rubble to you yeah exactly that is exactly what i said
00:08:42.060 and you'll notice all the women the conservative women backed her up right that's kind of what
00:08:47.340 women do we trust each other or whatever we come to each other's aids aid before facts 1.00
00:08:54.500 conservative, liberal, doesn't matter. Okay, this marker doesn't work. Is this camera on here? Okay, 1.00
00:09:00.180 it is. Okay, so when women are angry, there are certain insults they love. So when a woman is not 0.99
00:09:08.740 getting her way, so in Hillary's case, she's not getting her way. She wanted to be a victim. 1.00
00:09:14.520 That was her dream. She wanted to just be the victim, single mother, and this is often what 1.00
00:09:20.040 divorcees do. I really think we should send some of these divorcees to an impoverished country 1.00
00:09:26.680 because I don't know who in their right mind would say rebuilding from the rubble 0.99
00:09:32.160 when you're getting extortionate amounts of money in a divorce. I mean, that's crazy. So anyway,
00:09:40.840 so when a woman doesn't get her way, oh, sad woman, or a man, right? It could be either.
00:09:48.500 could be either, but I saw these patterns often. So number one, you are gay. So oftentimes this is 1.00
00:10:00.000 something they would say to me. They'd say, Pearl, you're just gay. And they say this, I'm not special.
00:10:05.260 They say this to men too. So this is what we have for her. She's just saying in a lot of words,
00:10:11.420 your day. Number two, you are insecure. Now, I don't know who is more insecure than women.
00:10:25.700 I just, we are the most insecure creatures. Men are too, but especially us. And we just,
00:10:32.620 we have a lot of, you know, we rely on beauty a lot and whatever, or we try to, we're kind
00:10:39.480 of overweight but so one thing they would say you're insecure and then they would psychoanalyze
00:10:46.920 you with any personal information you ever told them or they could find online so if it's a public
00:10:59.460 figure you know they would go after my family and say you know I'm insecure because of my family
00:11:06.720 you hate, oh, that's number three. You hate, insert whatever. Could be women, could be
00:11:19.100 your mother, could be whatever. I want to hear more from the chat. So feel free. And yes,
00:11:29.540 please go to theaudacitynetwork.com to support my work. We are demonetized on this channel because
00:11:36.040 apparently the truth just gets you demonetized. So we are trying to adhere to YouTube guidelines
00:11:42.940 while we are on their platform, but I go off the rails after for 30-minute show that I do after
00:11:49.900 the show. So Kevin Samuels would talk about this. It's shame, guilt, insult, and need to be right.
00:12:00.600 So this is an insult. You're insecure. Insult, shaming language, you hate, the psychoanalyzing.
00:12:10.340 Number four, why? Why do you do this? Why, why, why, why, why? Why would you say that? Why, why,
00:12:20.000 why, why, why? By the end of this two years, guys, I felt like I was almost a man because
00:12:29.000 I just had heard it all
00:12:31.820 at this point. I mean
00:12:33.560 you have
00:12:36.040 the pigeons are so
00:12:37.740 predictable. I just want to see
00:12:39.860 because sometimes you guys put some good stuff
00:12:41.860 in the chat. So if you have some
00:12:43.780 more of what
00:12:45.520 we women and men
00:12:47.880 sometimes do
00:12:49.580 when we don't get our way
00:12:51.540 feel free to put
00:12:52.520 why did you do this
00:12:55.860 you're so insecure
00:12:57.080 Or, I'm trying to remember the other ones, number five.
00:13:14.540 What would it be?
00:13:15.660 It would be, oh, oh, your tone.
00:13:19.220 Yes.
00:13:19.940 So another thing that I would get often would not be, is the information right or wrong?
00:13:27.080 it would always be it's how you say it so what happened was in this year I would
00:13:33.500 try all these different ways of saying it I would I would try to say it nicely
00:13:38.540 I would try to go around and be more politically correct I would and by the
00:13:44.720 end of this two years guys I was so done I was so done I was just like I'm gonna
00:13:51.800 say what I said and you guys can just kiss my anyways the tone police oh yeah
00:13:59.600 so I didn't get this one but a lot of men do small we're trying to be YouTube
00:14:07.580 friendly you have a small fill in the blank we're trying to be PC or incel so 1.00
00:14:18.600 So what's interesting, what's interesting is women, 1.00
00:14:23.600 especially the conservative women, 0.96
00:14:26.820 I mean, they would insult men by calling them an incel, 1.00
00:14:31.160 but also insult men for sleeping around.
00:14:35.140 And I would get so confused.
00:14:36.460 I'm like, don't you want them to be incels then, 0.95
00:14:38.740 because you don't want them to sleep around? 1.00
00:14:40.500 Isn't that like following what you're saying?
00:14:45.320 It would be like, it's a lose.
00:14:46.880 Anyway, so.
00:14:48.600 that's part of it let's see if anyone else has got we don't have small we don't have a small
00:14:58.200 they just have a big fernando fernando this is youtube pc we can do that on the website after
00:15:11.100 What are you doing?
00:15:14.120 Okay, so I just, these patterns, but this was a big one.
00:15:20.060 Shame, insult, guilt, and the need to be right.
00:15:23.580 Another one, oh yeah, arguing when they're clearly wrong.
00:15:27.740 So an example of a show that I had too many times.
00:15:33.440 Too many times.
00:15:34.520 It was, guys, it was like I had the same show over and over.
00:15:37.840 One was talking about overweight.
00:15:40.160 people. And oftentimes, we would maybe bring up Lizzo and say, that woman is fat. She's fat. I 1.00
00:15:47.580 mean, overweight, obese. And when I would say she was obese, the women on the show would say, no, 1.00
00:15:55.520 she's just thick, or someone like Lizzo, okay? And I would show them the BMI charts and say, look, 0.98
00:16:01.580 obese there there's no if ands or buts here obesity and the chart would be in front of them
00:16:10.400 and the men would agree and they would still say no do you know what it's like to do let's say in
00:16:20.140 a month three shows about body positivity and have to argue this for three hours
00:16:26.720 i saw michael knowles on a show arguing on whatever for eight or nine hours i don't know
00:16:35.940 how they do it i said you guys can have these panels i don't want it anymore so need to be
00:16:43.820 right and the more feminine or i guess blue-pilled the guy the more these are used i'm going to check
00:16:55.460 the chat real quick and see if there's anything interesting you guys you're
00:17:02.960 insecure nothing positive yeah this was okay so I understood I understood why
00:17:12.260 you know because a lot of times what I would hear from women with their issues
00:17:18.380 with relationships is they just wanted they just wanted the truth like why
00:17:23.480 I can't, you know, like one topic that came up often was infidelity.
00:17:29.080 And they would say, well, why can't the guys just tell me what it is?
00:17:33.320 Why, why do they, why can't they just be honest?
00:17:37.240 And ladies, let me just explain something.
00:17:39.420 What I figured out is a lot of men go through life, they say,
00:17:44.420 they tell us the truth, and then all of those things I just listed happen.
00:17:49.300 So they say, you know what's easier?
00:17:53.480 lying they realize that yeah that's that's now I'm not saying they should or
00:18:04.520 should I'm not saying that's the right thing to do but if you ever wonder how
00:18:09.980 do we get to a position where they lie or some lie right not all but that's why
00:18:17.780 It's because the consequences for telling the truth are just crazy, okay?
00:18:24.740 So, yeah, they can't handle the truth.
00:18:30.580 Okay, so now I'm going to come back to the chat.
00:18:34.280 We having a good day, everybody?
00:18:37.060 Oh, wait, do I need to turn this off?
00:18:38.740 Oh, no, it's off.
00:18:42.500 Please.
00:18:43.340 Yeah, the path of least resistance.
00:18:45.100 Yeah, and that was a big turning point for me
00:18:49.060 because before I would watch the Manosphere content
00:18:51.860 and I would think, I would think,
00:18:53.760 oh, well, why can't, why don't they,
00:18:57.540 why doesn't Myron just say it nicer?
00:18:59.300 Why doesn't Andrew Tate just say it nicer?
00:19:02.040 And I did, I interviewed a thousand women
00:19:04.200 and I thought, I see exactly why they don't. 1.00
00:19:09.320 I see exactly why they don't
00:19:11.240 because telling the truth just...
00:19:15.100 I mean, it got me, I mean, look at what, why did I have to build this website, guys?
00:19:24.320 I could have just Steve Harvey'd it, you know?
00:19:28.620 Okay, so, now, the reason I bring this up, now, this is what she's doing here, if you
00:19:36.940 bring up the screen, I also know I could be totally wrong here, my logical conclusion
00:19:43.200 is only a theory.
00:19:47.340 So this is plausible.
00:19:49.040 We talk about this a lot.
00:19:50.780 Plausible deniability.
00:19:52.360 It's the passive-aggressive.
00:19:54.160 I don't like what they're saying.
00:19:56.120 Here's the passive-aggressiveness.
00:19:58.800 But then I could be wrong.
00:20:01.560 It's just a theory.
00:20:03.700 So are you in or out?
00:20:04.860 And this is, there were times, guys, 1.00
00:20:08.300 that I almost preferred the aggressive women 0.99
00:20:11.920 than the passive-aggressive because at least they said what they said. 0.98
00:20:15.720 They said it with their chest, and I knew what I was getting.
00:20:19.840 But where I would get frustrated was the passive-aggressive.
00:20:24.700 Sometimes that would be more frustrating to me.
00:20:27.880 Okay, so now we have, and I've seen this Cernovich guy.
00:20:32.960 No offense.
00:20:33.960 He's a little bit, he's got a bit of a simpiness.
00:20:36.600 I've just seen it.
00:20:39.100 They're playing to their base.
00:20:40.580 It's an open secret that many of those podcasters are being OnlyFans girls.
00:20:46.120 So what's he doing? 0.86
00:20:47.900 Reputation destruction.
00:20:49.600 It's the same thing.
00:20:50.840 Who get publicity from appearances.
00:20:53.140 The podcast audience is gross, ugly men.
00:20:55.800 So they're insulting. 1.00
00:20:57.600 Now they're not only gay, they're gross and ugly. 1.00
00:21:01.180 Not homo, they're sexually frustrated, serial killer vibes. 0.99
00:21:05.240 because you know that's now we're playing the female game or male right right youtube youtube 0.98
00:21:13.920 okay um so anyways that's how i was going to open today's show because i just saw this and
00:21:23.060 thought we should talk about it that's what's going on here now we have matt walsh now matt
00:21:29.840 Walsh had a tweet today. And I actually love because, again, I came from a more trad con
00:21:38.400 thought process. But as much as I love them, like, you know, I enjoy their stuff.
00:21:46.800 I interviewed 1000 people. And I know you guys roll your eyes. You say, Pearl, we get it.
00:21:53.340 You don't get it. Okay. It's so many people. You know why Myron lost his hair?
00:21:59.840 like he had to get this whatever because it's a lot all right and you just learn so much and
00:22:07.680 your worldview has to come to reality to see what's true and what's not true so
00:22:12.560 I want to talk about the phases that men go through in life now if a guy was going to
00:22:19.980 I'll go through it in a second we're going to go back to the whiteboard so he says my
00:22:25.000 My controversial take on a lot of news is in the political and media world this week is that you
00:22:31.340 should not cheat on your spouse. It is a decision guaranteed to lead to pain, suffering, guilt,
00:22:37.840 and shame for all involved. No upside, all downside. After 13 years of marriage, I can't
00:22:43.300 understand why people do this. You're choosing to wreck your life. It's the least tempting thing I
00:22:48.140 can imagine. So I want to see how this measures up to what's true in the world. It sounds nice,
00:22:55.420 right? When you hear that, you're like, yeah, don't cheat. Cheating's wrong. But again,
00:23:02.440 I pride myself to a fault. I could do the same thing. I could go degeneracy, the feminine light,
00:23:10.440 right? But I pride myself on being accurate. And what was very surprising to me after interviewing 1.00
00:23:18.040 a thousand people was how when husbands or boyfriends cheated, this would not happen. 0.67
00:23:28.920 There's no morality in dating. We're not talking about moral or immoral. I'm talking about
00:23:35.560 what happened when men did certain behaviors. What I found was that when men cheated, the women were 0.76
00:23:43.720 more likely to stay than leave. It was more often that what he's saying, the pain, suffering, guilt,
00:23:53.620 and shame involved, the wrecking of the life and the marriage, I found that to be much more common
00:24:00.900 amongst men that were loyal than men that were not loyal. Now, you might think that this is
00:24:07.220 surprising, but I can explain it back on the whiteboard. So what I found was that,
00:24:15.340 and I found this out from, this is on right, good, okay. I found this out from a lot of guys that
00:24:25.760 coached men. So I was good friends with Troy Francis and a couple other dating coaches,
00:24:32.500 right? And these guys' jobs was to, and I talk about the phases of life a man goes through.
00:24:40.980 So usually, and I don't want to be offensive, but I'm trying to accurately describe this stuff.
00:24:50.540 All right, we got three guys. So we have the guys that are not getting laid. As we know,
00:25:01.980 for men under 30, one out of three, it's pretty common, haven't had sex
00:25:06.160 in the past year or are virgins. So we have one out of three men that women
00:25:10.080 just aren't picking at all. Why 1.00
00:25:13.740 this is, we could go back and forth, but I'm just describing what it is.
00:25:18.680 These are the relationship guys. So these are the
00:25:22.120 guys, the only way they can get sex is through relationships. So
00:25:25.860 this guy, in order
00:25:30.080 to get sex has to give attention, dates, whatever it is, be friends first. Okay. So this is the,
00:25:39.780 he's the, this is his wife or girlfriend. Okay. Boom. This is the guy that's sleeping with all
00:25:49.080 the women. So these guys would have different problems, right? So this guy's problem was he had
00:25:58.020 a bunch of women that wanted to sleep with them, but none 0.87
00:26:01.900 wanted to give him a relationship. So this is the guy that the women call
00:26:05.960 at 2 a.m. and they say, look, I'm down to, and he would think,
00:26:10.160 oh, maybe we're going to date now or
00:26:13.520 maybe, and this guy has seen it all. So he's seen
00:26:17.920 this guy's girlfriend that he thinks is an angel
00:26:21.860 do some not so angelic stuff. These guys, once they
00:26:26.080 Okay. So oftentimes guys go through life and they start here. They're in high school or college and
00:26:32.700 they say, ladies, are you interested? And they say, no, they're not. No, thank you. And they say, no, 0.96
00:26:38.280 we want this guy or this guy. And so the guys say, dang it. And then they become better. Maybe
00:26:44.020 they go to the gym or they get a good job. And then they say, ladies, are you interested? And 0.99
00:26:49.640 then they say, yes, but I want to be taken on a date first. Or yes, but you have to wait three
00:26:55.360 months or yes but whatever so then now they're this guy they can get a girlfriend so then usually
00:27:01.480 they get broken up with like two or three times they get dumped heart broke and or maybe they
00:27:07.380 dump them I don't know you know then they move to here I'll give you an example so I have a friend
00:27:14.480 he started here then he always had long-term girlfriends right first time in his life he
00:27:21.680 starts dating casually. So he starts dating multiple women at the same time. And they know
00:27:27.360 about each other. So this is kind of new to him, right? He said this was the best treatment he ever
00:27:32.360 got from women. So once a guy gets here, it's hard to get him back here. Because sometimes the women 0.98
00:27:41.540 treat him better here than they did here. Not to say it's impossible. Now, what is the theme? What 1.00
00:27:48.620 is the woman's dream right what is every romantic comedy about what is every so in Titanic right and
00:27:59.340 this is a movie that millions of women watched across and loved same with the notebook they're
00:28:06.260 both with this guy right and they miss this guy so what's her name the girl in Titanic is like 80 0.81
00:28:15.860 years old. She has kids with this guy, but she misses Jack in the bottom of the ocean. It's the
00:28:21.340 same thing with, what is the other woman's, the notebook, right? It's the high school boyfriend.
00:28:27.740 So every woman's dream is to, not every woman's, right? But a common theme or a common thing that 0.95
00:28:34.620 we see, because we are a bit delusional at times, is women want this guy to turn this guy into this
00:28:42.220 guy that's and some women pull it off but it's the exception it's not the rule right um okay so
00:28:52.960 matt if i had to guess right because usually this is just the normal a lot of married guys
00:28:59.200 were this guy and they got married to the first girl that wanted to marry them i don't know if
00:29:04.380 that's him. I don't really care. And so to them, the idea of being this guy is crazy, and they
00:29:13.200 think it's very moral, or immoral. And so what they're saying is it's a virtue signal. So what
00:29:20.040 is he? I'm going to come back here for a second. What is Matt signaling from this post? He's saying,
00:29:30.120 my take is that you should not cheat on your spouse. So he's saying, I am moral. These guys
00:29:39.580 are immoral. I'm moral. So what is this? This is what we call a virtue signal. Because do you guys
00:29:45.480 think that, hold on, can we, can we, the guy up here with the multiple women is going to see Matt
00:29:55.360 Walsh's tweet and say, you know what? Do you think Leonardo DiCaprio is going to see this and say,
00:30:00.460 you know what? I am done with these 19 year old hot women. I'm done with them. I'm done. Thank 1.00
00:30:07.340 you, Matt Walsh. No. And so a lot of times what we get from the media personalities is they want
00:30:13.580 to be the orbiters of morality. They want to tell it like, in a way it's, and I'm sure there's been
00:30:22.100 times, what? Oh, sorry, sorry, I thought it was that one. Okay, so this is a decision guaranteed
00:30:32.040 to live, lead to pain, suffering, and guilt, and shame for all involved. So is men, on average,
00:30:41.920 would I say, so this is what I would see happening if a marriage ended because of cheating. I'm
00:30:52.100 and again just my opinion if a woman got from this guy to go from here to this guy so if a woman 1.00
00:31:01.380 married this guy it didn't matter she was not she wasn't leaving if he cheated she would just
00:31:11.700 it's like have you ever seen that tick tock where the woman said when you catch your billionaire
00:31:16.660 husband cheating and you just this is a reality now i'm not what i'm not saying what i'm not saying
00:31:24.580 is that it should be that way or i want it to be that way i'm saying this is what i saw
00:31:31.780 a lot of times these guys were have no idea the amount of choice that these guys have an example
00:31:39.060 um i know a friend who's married to a very attractive guy and he has women approach him at
00:31:45.700 the gas station these two guys can't fathom that they they don't even
00:31:52.900 which most people can't fathom that right because this is like most people will not get to that
00:31:59.300 point um well it depends how old you go but okay regardless where was i going with this so
00:32:07.060 So what I would see more often, if she left because of cheating, it's because she thought
00:32:15.840 she married this guy, and he was acting like this.
00:32:19.940 And she thought, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I married you to be this guy.
00:32:25.700 You can't do that. 0.98
00:32:28.480 And there's certain words that women say that give away where we categorize a guy.
00:32:34.480 It's not conscious, but men are interesting because they've basically tracked us or, like, paid attention to our behavior for, like, 30 years and then came up with patterns that we say. 0.56
00:32:47.080 Like, if we say handsome, that's this guy.
00:32:50.860 If we say hot, sexy, that's this guy.
00:32:54.340 I'm going to continue.
00:32:55.920 I'm going to continue.
00:32:56.500 um after 13 years of marriage i can't understand the people who do this so again this is just it's
00:33:07.460 just a virtue signal it's to say i am moral they are immoral because clearly
00:33:13.260 none of these guys on the top are gonna stop doing what they're doing that's like
00:33:20.700 that's just not okay you're choosing to wreck your life it's the least tempting thing I can
00:33:28.680 imagine right because again you know I have a different friend he worked with a contractor
00:33:35.380 right and this contractor for his like house or something a day or two later that guy's wife is
00:33:41.920 sending him news now he didn't follow through with it but the guys in the middle can't imagine
00:33:49.000 what it's like for the guys on the top.
00:33:51.580 And social media exacerbates it even more
00:33:54.000 because, you know,
00:33:56.960 now they can get girls from, like, any city, right?
00:34:00.720 So it's just even worse.
00:34:02.400 Okay, so again, this isn't...
00:34:04.960 A lot of times when I say this,
00:34:06.340 people think I'm saying moral or immoral.
00:34:09.640 What I'm saying is that's not accurate.
00:34:12.760 It's just not true.
00:34:15.100 As much as we want it to be true.
00:34:17.760 Okay.
00:34:19.000 All right, so the main event.
00:34:20.320 I'm going to check the chat real quick,
00:34:21.880 and then we're going to do the main event. 1.00
00:34:27.680 Get that starter wife, put her to work maxing out that 401k 1.00
00:34:31.880 so you can get paid in that divorce. 1.00
00:34:35.100 Guys!
00:34:37.680 Yay, oh, that's another thing.
00:34:40.860 He says, I don't understand how men could do this.
00:34:43.700 Well, interesting thing, talking to male dating coaches,
00:34:46.540 is, if a guy has a wedding ring on, he's more likely to get hit on by women. 0.79
00:34:54.180 So, and, yeah, so, let me, the woman doesn't pull it off, she just happened to be there
00:35:11.800 when he decided to settle down.
00:35:13.380 That's true, that's true too.
00:35:14.680 Okay. So let me go to this last video because I wanted to, I saw, I love watching Brett Cooper
00:35:26.040 because she reminds me of how I sort of thought a couple of years ago until I went through this.
00:35:35.400 And so I enjoy watching her videos, but I just wanted to point out a couple patterns.
00:35:41.680 I was absolutely shocked when I found myself agreeing with Alex Cooper,
00:35:45.640 a.k.a. the host of The Controversial...
00:35:47.280 So why would a conservative woman or a liberal woman agree 0.95
00:35:51.520 when they have completely different ideologies? 0.99
00:35:57.900 Because...
00:35:58.460 I don't want to say this YouTube-friendly. 1.00
00:36:04.380 Because some women are still women. 1.00
00:36:06.980 Because it's...
00:36:08.980 i can't say i can't yeah relationships podcast call her daddy did not see that coming and to be
00:36:18.040 fair caller daddy has changed a lot since its beginnings at barstool and a lot of that has to
00:36:22.840 do with the fact that alex cooper after saying for years that she wouldn't and literally urging
00:36:26.800 her millions of female fans not to she settled down and married a good man and that is a story
00:36:31.580 Okay, what's that? When she says a good man, who is that in the chart?
00:36:40.420 And remember, the guy in the top is guys women find hot, sexy, etc.
00:36:47.020 Good man means, and this is why I hate the term alpha, beta, I don't know, sexy.
00:36:54.420 They're not alpha and beta, but it's basically saying long-term security, right?
00:37:00.300 itself for another time because she was basically terrified to tell all of her audience that she'd
00:37:04.340 gotten engaged and so a lot of women they don't know they're doing this but they're embarrassing
00:37:07.900 their husbands because they're basically calling them the nice guy but they don't know it because 1.00
00:37:13.980 it's not like a conscious thing she hit it she basically had to issue an apology and an explanation 0.63
00:37:19.500 for settling down it's crazy and it just goes to show in my opinion that at the end of the day no
00:37:23.560 matter how hard you try to convince yourself or millions of other girls who follow you that men
00:37:27.520 are trash and that you should be hardened and play the game and ghost them and sleep around and 0.96
00:37:30.800 literally cheat on them you might actually fall in love and be called to get married and you'll
00:37:34.320 want to have his babies okay how do we see what people want to do what do they do when they have
00:37:45.200 the most choice so she didn't want to do this when she was at the peak of her career
00:37:52.400 it was after right anyways so
00:37:59.740 almost like that's just a biological response but anyway i'm getting distracted from the actual
00:38:06.360 point on the topic of wanting to get married deep down i believe that it is something that
00:38:10.120 most women want again because we are biologically okay so
00:38:14.800 So, if women wanted to get married, and this is a, this was a turning point I had to have. 1.00
00:38:28.440 Women have dating apps where you, even if you're overweight, you can get thousands of matches online. 1.00
00:38:36.060 If women wanted to get married, they would do it. 1.00
00:38:40.120 but we have the lowest marriage rate ever 1.00
00:38:44.340 when women have more power to get married than ever before. 1.00
00:38:50.240 More choice, more options. 1.00
00:38:53.360 If you don't want to date in your town,
00:38:54.840 you can date in a different city.
00:38:56.560 If you don't want to date under a certain height,
00:38:58.980 you can go over.
00:39:01.280 Race, religion, you can filter out everything.
00:39:06.240 And you can just keep going on dates 0.93
00:39:07.880 until someone says yes, right?
00:39:10.120 I mean, with 5,000 matches, what would men do with that power?
00:39:16.920 I think they could find someone. 0.99
00:39:19.540 So if women wanted to get married, they would get married.
00:39:25.960 ...to want that commitment to then want children, and Alex Cooper...
00:39:29.260 So again, right now we have more options than ever.
00:39:34.360 Birth control, abortion, fertility treatments, both ways.
00:39:40.120 You can do IVF. 1.00
00:39:43.240 If women wanted to have children, we would be having children. 0.99
00:39:49.920 But you've given women, you've said, do anything. 1.00
00:39:54.160 And what did they say? 0.91
00:39:55.700 And again, it's the same cop-out I keep talking about.
00:39:58.700 It's society.
00:40:00.120 It's everyone telling them, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:40:04.160 It's just a cop-out.
00:40:05.340 They're adults.
00:40:06.040 We're adults.
00:40:06.820 We can make our own choices.
00:40:08.640 this subject actually had some very sound advice before we talk about that though make sure that
00:40:12.880 you like this video subscribe to the comment section channel if you have not already and of
00:40:16.320 course ring that notification bell so that you never miss a comment section episode all right
00:40:19.760 so last week alex was traveling somewhere for work and she took the opportunity to do a q a on
00:40:24.560 her instagram stories and many people were asking her about marriage and falling in love with her
00:40:28.000 husband among many other things but this response to a specific question really stood out to me so
00:40:32.160 this is a screenshot that i took but this person asked what is the one thing that you've learned
00:40:35.440 from marriage and she said you will know when they are the one no questions no doubts and then
00:40:39.600 this is the important part if you don't feel compatible or on the same page or emotionally
00:40:42.960 or physically connected to your partner or any of the above they are not the one i think that
00:40:46.720 many relationships feel like oh the natural next step would be this i'm x years old so wtf am i
00:40:51.760 going to do start over yes if you have at all thought to yourself how would i even start over 0.81
00:40:56.480 in your current relationship the answer is you need to leave okay so this is because women 1.00
00:41:01.520 in general have never had to compete for a man. Men have to compete for women. So they have to 0.72
00:41:11.480 become, go to the gym. They have to learn how to talk to women in a way that we find attractive.
00:41:18.480 They have to become, make enough money that we find them attractive, right? They have to go 1.00
00:41:23.920 through all of these steps. And women, on the other hand, whenever there's anything that 1.00
00:41:31.960 indicates that we have to be better, we always find a way to blame it on the guy, okay? So 0.99
00:41:40.000 if there's ever any doubts, they are not the one. No doubts, no concerns, nothing. You're perfect.
00:41:50.020 you're just so amazing and special and awesome there's nothing anyways i'm gonna continue yes
00:41:56.500 start over it is a temporary year or two or four that you need to restart but thank god because
00:42:01.220 you will then find somebody fully right for you i'm so happy that i found matt that's her husband
00:42:05.060 i okay so i want you to understand this mindset we view marriage as the end goal so it's never
00:42:15.300 becoming, okay, so if you talk to a woman that's done a lot of self-improvement, right, it's pretty 0.83
00:42:22.580 rare. And my thousand people I interviewed, I didn't find it often, but they would always come 0.98
00:42:28.580 in with a very humble attitude because they knew they had so many things to improve on.
00:42:35.740 There was a woman that came on my show that told me she was working on having a softer voice.
00:42:40.380 She was working on being less argumentative. And they could tell you specific ways of how 1.00
00:42:45.280 they do it but the more traditional dating advice from women is just he's the problem
00:42:54.240 it could not possibly be something you have to improve on or bring to the table many moments 0.74
00:42:59.360 like the above and i'm grateful that i got out of oh and they they view themselves as they have won
00:43:04.320 so they have gotten the ring and i think it's because again marriage is so hard for men to get
00:43:09.040 out of and I see this as the reason why a feedback I get from men is that their 0.97
00:43:15.140 wife completely changed after marriage because what tends to happen is women
00:43:19.360 get the ring then they love telling everybody what to do right they're the 0.97
00:43:23.560 CEO of like dating advice and marriage and what tends to happen is they view it 0.79
00:43:32.600 as they have one where women that are actually focused more on self-improvement
00:43:38.740 and becoming the best version of themselves for their husbands and the problem is when you get
00:43:43.460 the middle guy these guys have never really had other options so they don't typically have
00:43:50.420 standards for the women that they're with so the women that they're with they say you're perfect
00:43:54.580 as you are where the guy on the top who knows he can replace her has a very different attitude
00:44:02.180 where he will say, I don't want to say you ain't shit, but I'm trying to swear less, but
00:44:10.180 those guys know, the woman knows that if you get out of shape, I'm not putting up with this.
00:44:18.880 If you aren't sleeping with me, I'm not putting up with this. 1.00
00:44:23.920 Those women tend to have a very different attitude. 1.00
00:44:27.340 Those to find him. 0.99
00:44:28.320 Like 100% yes.
00:44:29.840 She is preaching to the choir here.
00:44:31.200 that is all incredibly sound, intelligent advice in my opinion. And if you've been,
00:44:35.020 okay. And this is what I mean when I say conservative and liberal women, it's like
00:44:38.760 the same mindset because we're in the modern era, right? It's not like a woman from the 1950s. 1.00
00:44:49.380 If your husband cheated, they would not really come to your aid and, and comfort you and say it
00:44:56.100 was all him it's like the woman I'm thinking of that was the most
00:45:01.080 traditional woman that I met would ask why he cheated and what did you do to
00:45:06.720 make him run to another woman but this stuff yeah so it's the same thing here
00:45:12.900 for a while and you've been watching comment section since the beginning you
00:45:15.420 know that we have talked about this specific thing a fair amount especially
00:45:18.180 for women this is why I care about the subject so much because you have 0.89
00:45:21.160 biological clocks we have biological clock so look I just want you to pay 1.00
00:45:24.820 attention it's all about what we want it's not and the thing is the women that I see
00:45:32.060 that I would argue love the man the most is when they're willing to give up what they want so
00:45:39.620 their timeline for his and what you and there's two the question is whose terms is the relationship
00:45:50.220 on? Is it on his terms or her terms? Is it his timeline or hers? And
00:45:56.440 men want to be loved for, I mean, I think we both want to be loved for ourselves to some degree, 0.97
00:46:06.480 but usually women want the children more than the man, or they want their timeline more than 0.95
00:46:14.400 the husband. And I'm going to, I'm going to get into it more. And so if there is even an
00:46:19.600 inkling in your brain that you might want children you should not be sitting around
00:46:23.600 twiddling your thumbs hoping that maybe one day this guy might propose or that you should stay
00:46:28.640 because you okay let me give you guys a realistic version of what timeline women should expect
00:46:36.720 now again usually okay so these guys what i've seen are willing to marry much quicker
00:46:46.800 Because, again, they don't have this, I will replace you if you don't act right mentality, right?
00:46:56.580 This is, et cetera.
00:46:57.980 Okay.
00:47:00.160 I forgot what I was going to do here.
00:47:02.060 I totally forgot.
00:47:03.000 I was going to do, hold on.
00:47:05.020 Let me watch this part of the video again.
00:47:07.240 I remember.
00:47:07.840 One second.
00:47:10.080 Oh, oh, I remember.
00:47:11.460 I did this on a show already.
00:47:12.420 OK, so the normal phase for these guys, not these guys.
00:47:18.000 These guys are much quicker for it.
00:47:20.000 And by the way, there's different strategies, right? 0.98
00:47:23.680 So maybe as a woman, you'd rather be with this guy. 1.00
00:47:26.720 The issue is, what I would see is women would always 0.95
00:47:28.900 divorce this guy.
00:47:30.340 Please don't shoot the messenger.
00:47:31.680 Please, please, please.
00:47:32.780 I don't say I want them to get divorced.
00:47:34.680 I don't say I'm happy about it.
00:47:36.620 I'm just saying what I saw.
00:47:38.580 So please, I am begging you.
00:47:41.220 Do not, you guys always come for me.
00:47:43.840 So these guys, what the process they typically go through
00:47:47.720 is casual dating,
00:47:52.700 six months
00:47:56.260 to one year.
00:47:59.960 Then,
00:48:03.620 relationship,
00:48:08.140 one to three years.
00:48:11.220 Step three. Ring engagement. Four to five. Okay. Five years, and this is the average
00:48:34.340 right now is how long you can expect. And so some women say, well, screw that. I'm not going for this 1.00
00:48:42.160 guy. I'm going to go for this guy. That's way easier. This guy will marry me in a year. This
00:48:47.120 guy's going to take five. And I don't blame them. That's not a bad strategy to have, right?
00:48:53.540 But what you see with Alex Cooper, right, is from zero to, or 20, or 18, whenever she started her
00:49:03.120 show. To 25, she was dating these guys. And now at 27, she's dating this guy. She even has an
00:49:13.100 incurable STD. She put that on the podcast, right? Amazing. So that's what's going on. That's what's
00:49:24.140 going on there. So, okay. So, oh, anyway, so the women are kind of like, in a way,
00:49:35.060 they're telling people which guy their husband is. And she has an, she has an, no, no, I'm not 0.84
00:49:49.000 talking about Brett. I was talking about, um, Alex Cooper. No, no, no, no, no, not Brett, not Brett.
00:49:55.580 Okay. Already invested too much time? No, that clock is ticking. If it's not right, stop wasting
00:50:01.580 precious time and energy, the one type of currency that you cannot get back, especially for women, 0.98
00:50:07.340 and take some action and go find the right thing. Because the right man will not need to be 1.00
00:50:12.540 convinced. The right man will not be shrouded in questions and doubts and concerns. And obviously,
00:50:17.480 the same goes for you men and any women that are playing games with you who have learned from call
00:50:21.080 her daddy over the years same goes for you okay so i want to explain why men wait why when men do
00:50:29.020 wait so i want to give you guys a couple stories so i worked at a gym worked out at like a power
00:50:36.800 lifting gym in london and there was this couple that had been together 10 years right and one
00:50:46.400 summer, they decided to tie the knot. They said, we're doing it this year. Finally, it's been a
00:50:51.420 decade. And so many guys come to the realization that after they give women the ring, and once
00:51:03.860 they have the ring, that means they have leverage, they completely change. You don't know who she is
00:51:09.700 when she has leverage.
00:51:12.240 And they might see, and the guys at this gym saw,
00:51:17.860 this woman divorced, she was with him for 10 years,
00:51:20.500 and in the first year of marriage, she divorced him.
00:51:23.460 What did you find out in the 11th year
00:51:25.540 that you didn't know for the first 10
00:51:27.760 that made you divorce him?
00:51:32.020 So oftentimes, they'll wait longer to alleviate risk,
00:51:38.480 to make sure that you are not crazy.
00:51:41.740 And I'm not saying you should put up with it
00:51:43.780 one way or the other.
00:51:44.760 I think you're an adult.
00:51:45.740 Think for yourself.
00:51:46.720 Pick what you want.
00:51:47.980 I don't care.
00:51:49.540 I'm just saying these are the reasons
00:51:52.360 the average is five years.
00:51:55.080 That means most people getting married today,
00:51:57.480 it takes five years to do it,
00:52:00.400 or three to five, I think, is the range.
00:52:04.560 Um...
00:52:08.480 Three to five. Yeah. So this isn't saying it's right or wrong, but I just don't think when
00:52:15.720 we hear this content about if he wanted to marry you, he would.
00:52:22.240 I want this. I want, I want to have kids this year. I want to do it this year. It's sort of
00:52:28.280 missing the point because it's all about what you want and not what he want. Um, okay. Let me.
00:52:36.260 and also for men unfortunately you do have extra responsibility because you don't have that same
00:52:42.000 biological clock and so if you are not sure or you do not want to take that next step if you're
00:52:45.920 not interested in being a father or not interested in getting married yet you continue to string a
00:52:50.060 woman along who loves you and is trying to make it work because it's convenient and comfortable
00:52:53.460 okay this is another one oh he strung her along nope nope nope nope nope nope sorry but we have
00:53:04.360 zero excuses. We get 5,000 matches on dating apps, even if you're unattractive. There's no,
00:53:13.660 he just strung you along. You're an adult. You're not a kid. We're adults. And as adults,
00:53:19.060 you can make your own decision. Guys will date women for many years and spend thousands of
00:53:25.340 dollars on them just for them to leave. They don't get the get out of jail free card that
00:53:33.740 they were just strung along. Nope, nope, nope. We're not kids. And this language that we use
00:53:41.340 often is almost as if we're children, right? And you want to get laid, which is honestly why a lot
00:53:47.020 of guys say in relationships, you need to be honest and cut her loose. Because wasting a 1.00
00:53:51.320 young woman's time when she trusts you and wants marriage and children is one of the cruelest, 1.00
00:53:55.840 gross... Sometimes, sometimes, another thing is sometimes guys change their mind. 0.98
00:54:01.220 And yeah, you know, sometimes they date you, and then they think,
00:54:10.100 nah, I don't want to get married yet, or nah, she's crazy.
00:54:15.140 Some guys just change their mind, and it's not, and a lot of times the women will say, 0.99
00:54:19.340 oh, we strung me along for years, but they miss out on the crazy thing that made them get dumped.
00:54:24.980 It happens, you know, take the L.
00:54:27.020 these things that i can imagine i mean it's fine it is your prerogative if you don't actually want
00:54:33.880 to be with her let's see i just want i just want to keep going through nowhere in this advice we're
00:54:40.000 going to get to the whole video there wasn't one piece of advice on how to be more worthy of a ring 1.00
00:54:46.340 the most feminine woman i ever met was not married i swear i swear to you she was not 1.00
00:54:55.680 most feminine woman i've ever met in my life unmarried 0.99
00:55:00.220 100 sure about her it's fine if you don't want to get married and you're not comfortable with
00:55:06.900 the institution of marriage if you don't want to be father what because again remember they view
00:55:10.480 marriage as the end goal it's never becoming a better wife bringing more to the table it's
00:55:17.040 marriage is the end state no one's won when they got married i don't know what's going to happen
00:55:24.200 to you in a decade i don't know if you'll still be married i hope you are i always wish you know
00:55:29.720 but we don't know
00:55:33.960 but move on so that you can find the right person who is on the same page as you but playing that
00:55:38.600 game and toying with somebody is and i just have to go from personal experience so i went to two
00:55:43.800 weddings in the past two years or no i went to three guess how long out of the three couples
00:55:51.160 two of them were together. So one wedding, they were together for a year. The next wedding,
00:55:58.840 they were together for seven years. And the other wedding, they were together for 11 or 12.
00:56:10.060 Why did the guys wait so long? They just wanted to wait until they were a little more settled
00:56:18.500 for when they got married and the women gave up their timeline and what they wanted for what he
00:56:24.580 wanted because they loved him that much does that mean he just doesn't value or appreciate them but
00:56:31.960 if a woman is influencing women don't like men that we can control and so if we're putting our
00:56:39.400 timeline onto the men then the relationships on our terms not theirs so wrong which is why i love
00:56:46.260 alex said this because i'm sure that it will make an impact in many many lives now alex's answer to
00:56:50.260 that question reminded me of something that i recently saw go viral on tiktok there was a 0.65
00:56:53.700 really sweet woman she randomly popped up on her you page her name is mckenzie and she made a video 0.88
00:56:57.540 where she was asking for advice about her relationship and the entire situation was just
00:57:01.700 heartbreaking listen to this i think that this video got over 2 million views in like 24 hours
00:57:05.860 for those of you that are married how did you get your significant other to see the value in getting
00:57:12.580 engaged and getting married girl to girl what are some of the things that you did to accomplish that
00:57:18.660 because i'm really struggling to get him to see my perspectives and how much marriage would mean
00:57:24.180 to me i don't have those things that i have been asking for and he says it's really selfish of me
00:57:30.020 to ask for them i mean the reason why this video stood up okay so now i already know it's just
00:57:35.380 going to go oh poor woman so this is how a lot of men are going to see it now men
00:57:44.560 with a more religious background are gonna see this a little differently
00:57:48.700 right but most people in general aren't overly religious so this is just talking
00:57:55.600 to the average guy okay so
00:58:01.020 So, if you live together, if you spend every day together,
00:58:22.820 maybe even have a kid together some people do some people don't but have a kid together
00:58:34.920 what changes when you get married and a lot of women a lot of men see women's need for marriage
00:58:48.040 as a way to get approval from her friends.
00:59:04.600 Post on Instagram.
00:59:08.920 Because the men, what the men will do is they'll say,
00:59:11.500 okay, you want to get married because of God.
00:59:13.600 Okay, well, you want to get married because of God.
00:59:17.640 well are you a virgin did you do things the God way and then she'll say well no I mean and then
00:59:27.020 he might look at you and say do you even go to church like did you have you gone to church
00:59:31.240 recently she's like well I don't want that part and he'll be like what we live together
00:59:38.980 and so for men nothing changes nothing will change when you get the ring other than you can get
00:59:48.220 approval from your friends and post it on IG and there was a story a friend of mine he's an older
00:59:56.560 guy and he was a successful guy who lived down south I think and he told me something really
01:00:06.580 interesting because his ex-girlfriend broke up with him for this very reason she wanted to get
01:00:11.580 married and he just felt like she wanted the wedding more than him because from his head
01:00:20.100 you already have me you have all my time I'm not seeing anyone else yeah yeah monogamy
01:00:24.740 I'm not seeing anyone else what changes you're not even religious you're like
01:00:31.760 she was an older woman she's like 35 and like I think she had a kid so he just
01:00:38.320 didn't see the point I mean we can invite all these 0.99
01:00:44.580 people we don't care about spend all this money for what and women will make 1.00
01:00:54.620 it very black and white well they'll say well he just doesn't like you enough if 0.71
01:00:58.880 If he wanted to, he would. 0.98
01:01:01.300 But my question for women is, do you want the wedding 1.00
01:01:05.840 or do you want the man? 1.00
01:01:08.560 And for some women, it's the wedding. 1.00
01:01:10.320 Then, OK, dump him. 0.56
01:01:13.980 If you want the man, sometimes you've got to be patient.
01:01:19.520 And that doesn't give you a guaranteed.
01:01:22.080 and even if you are patient it doesn't give you a guaranteed outcome there's no guaranteed outcomes
01:01:32.580 in life so a lot of times when people go to online to the internet they're looking for a
01:01:39.240 way to guarantee that nothing bad will ever happen that we will not be single mothers that we will
01:01:45.900 not get divorced, then none of these bad things will ever happen. But this is life, and there's
01:01:54.380 no guarantee if that woman leaves her boyfriend that she'll find someone she likes better.
01:02:01.680 And that she won't, there's no guarantee if she stays that he'll marry her. But I never,
01:02:11.920 my point more is I never hear strategies on how to improve ourselves it's always just I'll leave
01:02:18.740 if you don't do what I want it's always the same oh if he doesn't do exactly what I want the way I
01:02:25.100 want it then I'm going to go it's always the same thing me from the get-go is because it wasn't
01:02:30.700 selfish it wasn't entitled she wasn't demanding something like I need a ring I want to be a bride
01:02:34.560 she was genuinely asking for advice because she thought that the situation that she was in and
01:02:38.560 all the comments are gonna be you've done nothing wrong you're amazing leave was okay that all she
01:02:45.100 needed to do was convince this guy a little bit more and make him see her perspective that he
01:02:49.000 really should want to be with her and commit to her for life I mean that's why it was so 0.79
01:02:52.460 heartbreaking and then on top of that what I found out later is that she's a single mom who met this
01:02:56.240 man who loves this man she's trying to do right by her son she wants something serious for her son
01:03:00.780 And obviously, this was not...
01:03:01.880 Okay, Brett.
01:03:07.500 Okay.
01:03:09.100 Okay, but let me tell you how men are going to see this.
01:03:12.840 Why on earth... 1.00
01:03:14.360 So if she gave a child to a guy without a ring,
01:03:18.540 why on earth would a guy put a ring on it
01:03:22.760 when the last guy got a kid without a ring?
01:03:26.260 What incentive does he have to do that?
01:03:31.500 why does he have to pay a higher price for a lower product i know that's not nice to hear but why
01:03:42.060 why okay forward the way that she had expected and she genuinely wanted advice on how to make
01:03:46.540 it work and i was so so happy to see a general consensus in the comments one girl said if you
01:03:50.940 have to convince him he doesn't want you this is what i mean guys we are how we are like it's the
01:03:57.340 same right left it's the same another person said you're probably thinking you invested so many years
01:04:01.740 and you don't want to start over but you do not want to be married to the wrong person starting
01:04:05.260 over now is easier than after a divorce another person said i built a whole house with a man and
01:04:09.420 played wife for three years that's a whole other story which we've talked about playing wife before
01:04:13.340 you actually have the ring again it's always let me give less in order to get what i want
01:04:19.020 that's always it never is to give more and be better and improve it's always let me give the
01:04:25.740 men less wifey treatment so i can get what i want wait without hesitation you have to be on the same
01:04:35.580 page that's what alex was talking about this will never work resentment will take over eventually
01:04:39.500 you're not selfish let him go find less and i don't even think that we need to say let him go
01:04:43.100 find less like let him go find the person that he actually wants to be with let him go not get
01:04:48.300 married if he doesn't want to get married maybe it will be less but it might just be that they
01:04:51.340 genuinely do not want the same things and they aren't willing to come together and have that
01:04:54.700 hard conversation because again it's convenient to just ignore it and stay in something that's
01:04:58.780 comfortable and stagnant last comment i'll read this girl said i wish i could give you a hug
01:05:02.460 i think deep down you have all the answers you need it is selfish of him to steal your youth
01:05:06.540 yes if he's not interested in the same future as you i hope that all of this works out now what 0.89
01:05:10.940 about you stealing us time and attention i don't i just the one-sided women's advice is just 1.00
01:05:18.060 It drives me crazy. I mean, I would say as a single mother, you want to get married now? Good 1.00
01:05:25.500 luck. Good luck. You kissed that goodbye. You kissed that goodbye when you had the kid out of
01:05:33.400 wedlock or you got divorced. Now you've been demoted from future wife to future girlfriend.
01:05:40.860 It just is what it is. 1.00
01:05:42.420 Take that L.
01:05:44.240 Or you can go lower.
01:05:47.720 You can go lower and find a guy with less options.
01:05:53.980 And then he might do it.
01:05:55.800 I think that she understood this as well.
01:05:57.280 I think that she knew what she was asking
01:05:58.980 and the implications of this,
01:06:00.140 but this is such a vulnerable position to be in.
01:06:03.200 Like this is such a hard-
01:06:04.200 And then we never questioned the incentives. 1.00
01:06:06.300 What, okay, so if this woman is going to the internet 1.00
01:06:10.860 And telling her personal relationship problems. 1.00
01:06:15.640 I mean, she's going to the internet for sympathy.
01:06:18.220 Like, that's what she's there for. 0.72
01:06:20.320 She wants to leave.
01:06:21.460 She just wants confirmation.
01:06:23.720 But I'm glad this is becoming public,
01:06:26.060 because this is how friends ruin relationships. 0.99
01:06:29.200 So if she, if this was a single mother who has a guy that's living,
01:06:32.660 and I don't know the situation, but I'm just, hypothetically.
01:06:36.020 If she's got a guy that's living with her,
01:06:38.960 maybe going 50 50 on rent or paying the bills i don't know and he's a good guy and he's stepping
01:06:47.080 in as a stepfather involved in the kid's life and he's been there for a couple of years it might not
01:06:54.360 be a bad deal because my question is what do you have to bargain with i mean she seems a little bit
01:07:00.680 chubby so maybe my advice would be if you want to i mean get to the gym right thing to ask because
01:07:08.220 it's basically asking the world like does he not love me enough it's scary it's uncomfortable and
01:07:13.020 i'm sure that she just needed the validation and the confirmation that what she was feeling
01:07:17.020 was not crazy just like i'm giving you the confirmation that red light therapy will
01:07:20.140 literally change your life now i've been loving my bond charge i will not yeah i'm sorry bro
01:07:27.500 we gotta skip this i won't what did i do did i meet it is if one partner desperately wants to
01:07:34.380 move on to that next step and is ready and is so madly in love with you and the other partner
01:07:38.540 refuses and is not interested in budging is not ready to do that whatever the reason is whether
01:07:42.700 that's because they're again if we're talking about a traditional wife it's giving up what
01:07:50.220 you want for what he wants i'm not saying you have to do that but i would be pretty cautious
01:07:58.380 because you don't know if the grass is really going to be greener out in the dating market
01:08:04.740 sure about the person that they're dating or because they just don't want the next step they
01:08:08.360 don't want to be married they don't want kids or whatever it is but regardless why stay and try to
01:08:12.920 fit a square peg into a round hole when it clearly doesn't work why lie to that person and drag them
01:08:18.380 on for years you cannot get that time back it is literally the one thing you cannot get back you
01:08:22.980 can make more money you can move to a new place you can get a new house you can get a new apartment
01:08:25.720 whatever you cannot get your time back and for women i wish that every woman could hear this
01:08:30.120 you can't get these years back so you should be incredibly incredibly careful
01:08:33.400 on who you are giving those years to yeah so again it's the same thing when we talked about earlier
01:08:39.560 do not she's saying don't go for the players not about not bad not about it
01:08:46.200 not bad advice and go for the guys that it's easier to get that from
01:08:51.240 um not i'm not saying that's bad advice i'm just saying this is what we're communicating thankfully
01:08:57.800 this young woman mckenzie got the support that she needed and this was her update just because
01:09:01.680 this is where we're at does not at all make him a bad guy so please be gentle be kind it's been
01:09:06.520 great to me in many areas oh my gosh days of my life i'm forever grateful for that whatever is
01:09:12.740 for me will not miss me and whatever misses me was never for me my true self is gonna attract
01:09:18.160 the person, whoever that is, whether it's him, someone else. And the last thing that I want to
01:09:24.420 do is pressure someone into wanting me. And I know that those lines about
01:09:29.080 pressure someone into wanting me. Yeah. It's, it's, it's always, it's always back to a guilting
01:09:41.120 tactic, well, why don't you want me? Where if she was doing everything she could and really focused
01:09:55.200 on him to the point where it's really interesting talking to the woman I tell you guys about, the
01:10:01.100 very feminine one, the way she describes her man, it's like, I study him. I know him better than he
01:10:07.360 knows himself there's no woman that could take him from me and she just had this level of like
01:10:12.340 confidence I guess um that comes from knowing you're doing your job right so that's it that's
01:10:20.500 kind of I think we got to the point from that and my general point is always it's always the same 0.79
01:10:28.180 thing female dating advice it's always give him less to see if you can get more withhold in order
01:10:37.060 to get. And it's never about self-improvement. It's always if he wanted to, he would. And
01:10:43.820 yeah, this is why there's no female self-improvement, unfortunately. But let me know what you guys
01:10:50.280 think in the comments. Maybe you guys disagree, you know, just my opinion. So like the video
01:10:57.220 on your way out, subscribe to the channel. I love you guys and talk to you next time.
01:11:07.060 You