Pearl - Where Have All The Good Men Gone？？

00:00:00.000 and i think the good man is financially stable he's excited he's more key she's a gold digger

00:00:05.480 but these are not if you're if you're go your goal is gold digging not bad advice what up guys

00:00:10.720 welcome to my reaction series today we are reacting to a woman asking where are all the good

00:00:15.920 men apparently this is a female dating coach and the thing about women coaching women is we just

00:00:20.840 we tend to lead each other into destruction um so we'll see if this woman has any good advice

00:00:26.820 I doubt it, but you never know. Katie podcast where I'm going to get you confident, help you

00:00:31.360 be successful. And hopefully you're going to have some fun dating. Now, if you followed for a while,

00:00:35.820 you'll know that I believe in old school standards with new school style. And the last couple of

00:00:40.180 podcasts were about my wedding. Translation, I want men to do more while giving them less.

00:00:46.400 Not a bad strategy, right? I mean, that's a strategy we've had for a hundred years and it's

00:00:50.380 worked pretty well, to be honest. Lowering what women have to do and raising what men have to.

00:00:58.140 I mean, when you think about it logically, it's like, as a customer, you want the most value for

00:01:02.920 the lowest price. So it doesn't shock me that women are like, do less, get more.

00:01:06.920 I am now married. I'm in a new home. It's absolutely fantastic. And I want to say that

00:01:12.200 I bring these things up because I want you to be encouraged. I was the woman who said,

00:01:16.900 oh where's all the good guys at oh this is exhausting i'm never gonna get married again

00:01:21.540 and look at me now so there is yeah um you're married because you're pretty good looking for

00:01:27.140 your age i'm not good looking in general but for your age right it's more to it's more to it hope

00:01:34.260 there is a right way to do it and that's why i know that you're one of my 20 percenters because

00:01:38.580 you're listening to these podcasts you are getting that's a manipulation tactic it's like

00:01:43.140 you're awesome if you agree with me i'm only talking to the top people yeah it's it's just

00:01:48.820 sales my golden nuggets of the best dating advice out there and there's some bad dating advice out

00:01:54.420 there i've been watching ig and i just want to cry get to the point sometimes for some of the

00:01:58.980 dating advice which will be a podcast coming up but for today's podcast i just did a great women's

00:02:04.100 event and right away the first question that they asked me was miss katie where are all the you know

00:02:10.340 you know, where are all the men at? And I always have to stop them right there. What do you mean

00:02:13.800 men? First off, we don't want just any man. We want a good man. And we, we know we want that

00:02:18.080 other. When women say good man, it means I've hit the wall. Yeah. I'm not hot enough to get the bad,

00:02:23.640 the criminals anymore. So now I want, yeah. 20% or so what's this 20% or Katie, it's someone who's

00:02:29.360 cool. Like they've, they've done their work. They've done the deeper work. So they're quality

00:02:34.360 people, you know, they're cool, they're quality and they're ready. So you're cool because you've

00:02:39.240 traveled. You're memorable. You've done great things. Your quality, because you've done the

00:02:44.320 deeper work. And then you're ready is because you're serious. You're not out playing. You've

00:02:49.500 maybe done that. You've had that stage. I have a girlfriend in that stage right now. She sends me

00:02:53.800 the guys she sees from Bumble. And I'm like, no, he's an 80 percenter, but she's just having fun.

00:03:00.100 And look, if you've got to get your wiggles out, get your wiggles out. That's fine. But when you're

00:03:04.540 Yeah. So again, giving them less, expecting more. And this is the thing, the whole phase,

00:03:11.460 whatever, women used to have the, women used to at least hide it. Like they had the decency

00:03:15.840 to be ashamed, but now there's like no shame. They're just like, I'm going to do my whole

00:03:20.640 phase and get married and let everyone know. And yeah. Ready. Make sure that you make it very clear

00:03:26.520 whether you're ready or not, make it clear either way, because that's what's right and fair.

00:03:30.140 and just be ready to find that person, find your other 20 percenter. All right. Well,

00:03:35.580 let's get talking. Obviously this is for the ladies, but guys, this can help you kind of

00:03:39.640 show up to where you need to be. You know that I play both sides of the table here and it's

00:03:44.780 really important that women really get clarity on dating. I find that, and ladies don't be

00:03:49.880 offended, but I find that you live a little bit in romance land and I'm a believer that dating is

00:03:56.520 80% practical and 20% romantic. Now guys, you're going to have to work on that room when you're

00:04:01.940 old. Yeah. When you're young, it's all feelings, but yeah, when you're old, then you got to be

00:04:05.880 practical. Mantic part. I'd like you to just, you know, make sure you're hitting that 20%.

00:04:10.100 If you're over the 20%, good job. But ladies, when you are choosing a man,

00:04:14.440 when you're finding the good man, the good guy, you've got to get practical.

00:04:19.260 And let's start with number one here. Let's define the good guy. Now I have plenty of podcasts out

00:04:24.000 there. As a matter of fact, go listen to my podcast. Number five is one of my top listened

00:04:28.660 to podcasts for a reason. And I put it right in the beginning because it's the four things that

00:04:33.980 I believe every woman should be looking for, for a good man. Now, when I say good man,

00:04:38.780 I'm talking about the kind of guy who's not just the nice guy. I don't know if you've heard the

00:04:43.380 term a simp, you know, this guy that's just kind of too nice and giving you too much and just does

00:04:49.000 whatever you say he kind of lays down for you but the good man still has a backbone and that's what

00:04:54.880 we love about the good man he shows up but he doesn't put up with your laziness your lack of

00:05:00.120 communication because he's a 20 percenter and he doesn't have time for that so if you are that girl

00:05:04.620 you need to step okay i don't actually completely disagree with this okay i'm i'm waiting for the

00:05:10.580 bullshit because that's just usually what women peddle but that's not a bad because you know you

00:05:14.980 don't want a guy that's going to reward bad behavior what up guys my name is pearl davis i

00:05:20.180 have a youtube show and i'm a cultural commentator if your wife girlfriend or situationship is acting

00:05:25.940 up you can hire me to make a personalized video to break the news i can tell her to lose weight

00:05:31.620 stop being a bitch stop spending too much money get back in the kitchen or stop being a whore

00:05:36.660 is your buddy simping for an overweight mid i will tell him to stop contributing to hoflation today

00:05:43.220 find me on shout out for only 2.99 you can put your wife in her place today and you can get

00:05:49.060 your friends to stop simping that's what a simp is they reward terrible behavior up your game

00:05:54.580 because good men will not they won't play that game they won't have time for you but they're

00:05:59.140 also the good man is also not the alpha now let me explain the alpha and this is in my podcast number

00:06:06.020 six which is kind of a continuation for you ladies i say that there's three kinds of men

00:06:11.840 Now, I know every time I talk to a woman, they want to date an alpha male.

00:06:15.880 They want a go-getter.

00:06:17.180 But you might be surprised that that go-getter alpha male might be the quietest man in the room.

00:06:21.900 As a matter of fact, my husband is that guy.

00:06:24.100 He is a quiet guy.

00:06:25.500 He's not out and about.

00:06:26.840 He's not Mr. Gregarious.

00:06:28.120 He's not buying everybody drinks, which is a win for me.

00:06:32.200 So that's where the practical comes in.

00:06:33.820 I don't want the man who's buying drinks for every girl.

00:06:37.380 Yeah, that's cope.

00:06:38.680 All women want that guy.

00:06:40.100 But I, that means you can't get them, which, okay. I don't hate this advice though. Um,

00:06:45.200 a lot of quiet guys have personality when you get to know them. It's just like, you know,

00:06:49.880 they're a little quiet at first. And sometimes the smartest guy in the room is quieter because

00:06:54.660 you know, idiots talk more. So friendly that he's too friendly with everybody. Ladies get smart and

00:07:02.440 you. Yeah, but we love flirts. We love them. Don't want the hot guy because that hot guy is

00:07:07.800 going to have women flinging themselves at them. And let me tell you, people have lost their

00:07:12.180 scruples. It takes two seconds and these women could care less if he's taken, if he is married,

00:07:18.380 they will just go for it. I have seen it in real life and I have, and I'm a fighter and I have

00:07:23.520 fought back. I rolled into that ring and I was like, girl, don't even come close. So make sure

00:07:28.460 that you're really choosing a man for his character, for his goodness. He's got to be good

00:07:33.540 looking to you of course yes I know that's true but be careful of the alphas out there and in that

00:07:39.360 podcast number six I defined the two different kinds of alphas out there so yeah women try to

00:07:45.280 like they try to recategorize betas as alphas and convince everyone that their husband is alpha so

00:07:51.560 it's kind of rationalizing um but alpha is like contextual the same guy can be alpha in one

00:07:56.780 environment and beta in another it's just the question is does he lead the relationship and I

00:08:01.280 just talking that's the only environment that matters working with a potential client we do

00:08:05.040 these discovery calls with our matchmaking team so they get to know us and they can see some of the

00:08:09.680 the women in our database or men if it's a female discovery call you know these guys are looking for

00:08:15.200 the same thing you're looking for ladies they're looking for a ride or die kind of woman and i

00:08:20.320 always like to say it like this would he be by your side when you have cancer not that you're

00:08:24.560 going to get cancer because we speak against that but will he and look this i'm talking old age here

00:08:29.680 will he wipe your butt if and when needed i mean is there going to be a day where trouble comes

00:08:34.880 because it's quite possible like life yeah she's just asking not what can you do but what can you

00:08:40.480 get out of it so women don't even try to i think she's well-meaning but yeah does not promise us

00:08:46.080 anything and we want to be that person who will do it and you probably are but you need to find

00:08:51.040 that equal who will be that ride or die so men are looking for the same things i promise you

00:08:56.880 Well, let's go to number two. Here's what I want to say before, you know, where are all the good

00:09:00.440 men, Katie? Well, number two, stop doing what you're doing because it's not working. And I

00:09:05.320 have been recently going out with some of my single girlfriends, spending a ton of money on

00:09:09.920 drinks, dressing up. Like I love a good reason to dress up, but there is this energy that we're

00:09:15.900 kind of giving off and I don't need to anymore. Thank goodness. But it's just like desperation.

00:09:20.300 Let's go to a nice bar. Let's dress up. Let's hope we meet a good guy. And look, that energy

00:09:25.340 is palpable. These men can feel it. As a matter of fact, I'm going to explain on a different

00:09:30.300 podcast about spark versus chemistry and how many of you women are not bringing the spark to your

00:09:35.300 dates. You have no spark in you, but we will talk about that later. They get too dug out. And when

00:09:40.560 they're dug out, they've just gotten pumped and dumped and disappointed too many times. And now

00:09:44.920 they're old, old and dull, but some men like dull women. That's why they don't, they think the woman's

00:09:50.660 just like um boring but it's like no she's just boring for you king sorry you're going to the

00:09:55.880 same places you're doing the same thing and therefore you're complaining it's not working

00:10:00.680 for you i and i told my girlfriend i'm done when we go out to dinner we're going out for ourselves

00:10:05.380 and we're not going out to try to meet men it will come so you're okay look if you're not meeting men

00:10:13.180 out it's probably because you're going to female places um so you go to an expensive gym instead

00:10:18.740 of a practical gym right you go to a restaurant that's fancy and not like practical so when it

00:10:26.420 needs men like practical to come but this whole energy of where are they at trying to drive around

00:10:31.140 try the new place you know and not only that we're getting there and all these kids are 30.

00:10:35.940 i mean we tried some new places in beverly hills we tried some new places in uh newport newport

00:10:40.740 beach and literally everybody was 30 and like flip-flops and this is a newport flip-flops and

00:10:45.780 And it's not where I want to be.

00:10:47.880 We dressed up nice and look, that's not my energy.

00:10:51.440 That's not what I want to be doing.

00:10:52.520 And I know you are busy.

00:10:54.380 That's the last thing you want to be doing is hoping when you go out that you can meet

00:10:58.220 somebody.

00:10:58.580 I would just use the dating apps way easier.

00:11:00.960 So let's stop doing this.

00:11:02.280 Let's stop going to the same places.

00:11:03.680 As a matter of fact, we're going to talk about a new approach.

00:11:06.380 This is number three, a new approach.

00:11:09.320 Now, ladies, I believe that deep down, all of us want to be what I call taken.

00:11:14.820 All right.

00:11:15.420 Now, some of you might want to be truly married in a full official marriage.

00:11:18.780 Some of you just want to live together.

00:11:20.260 I don't care what you want to do, but you want to be in a deep, connected relationship.

00:11:25.040 And ultimately, you want to know that somebody chose you and you need to choose them.

00:11:29.180 As a matter of fact, I heard a podcaster say that it's BS that you let a man choose you.

00:11:33.980 Well, I'm sorry.

00:11:34.920 I think she's BS because I want my man to choose me and I want to choose him every single day.

00:11:41.000 So when I say this word taken, I actually have a necklace on right now.

00:11:43.820 it says taken my man got this for me he actually uh i used to work retail and it's bragging about

00:11:49.900 the stuff he does and not him he went and got gas in my car because that's what good see that

00:11:54.960 oh my god this is like you're training him he should be training you she runs it she runs the

00:12:00.840 relationship yeah men do and it's a controlling woman like that's most of these dating coaches

00:12:07.180 it's like strategies to try to gain control but the happiest relationships are when you're not

00:12:11.160 in control. When he did that, he came back and he had a little box and it had this necklace taken.

00:12:16.620 So that's always kind of been my thing is I want to be taken. And I love the idea of that. And

00:12:22.600 even on my wedding jacket, I had a jean jacket that said taken. So ladies, I am actually creating

00:12:28.260 a course and it's coming out right away. It's coming out in October. It's every Monday night

00:12:32.840 in October. It's four weeks long live zoom with me and it's called getting to taken whatever that

00:12:38.520 means for you i'm going to show you how to do it different what it is that could be your roadblocks

00:12:43.740 we're going to what is it all right can we get through that as a group it's going to be fantastic

00:12:47.660 if you're listening to this oh my god all right so so here's an example you you got me eight

00:12:54.820 minutes in and you still haven't gotten to the point you're going to the same places with no

00:12:58.660 effect so you've got to try a new approach well just are you trying to meet in person or apps

00:13:03.980 okay in person i could i could i'm not a dating coach but god i could give women better strategies

00:13:10.140 dive bars if you want to go out drinking dive bars men look for a bodybuilding gym or something

00:13:16.700 that's very practical low cost men don't like fancy gyms if there's if there's a fancy gym

00:13:24.140 there has to be something they're getting out of it and usually they're trying to run through women

00:13:27.180 that's why they're there this monday my man and i we were in chipotle for lunch now i've gone

00:13:31.500 gone multiple times to Chipotle, but this time I noticed, and it's truly like this,

00:13:36.480 it was all men. It was packed. You have business men in there. You have men that are air conditioning

00:13:44.040 guys. You have men in biker suits. You have men with full tattoos. It doesn't matter. It was full

00:13:50.420 of men. Now, I don't know what kind of guy you're looking for, but I do know that never, ever try to

00:13:56.400 guess what kind of guy that is. Like I have met guys that are fully tattooed and they are uber

00:14:01.960 wealthy and you would never know, but you make quick judgments. And this is what I noticed you

00:14:06.540 ladies do. And even I heard, you know, someone said, well, there's no rich guys there. And it's

00:14:11.460 not that you're looking for a rich guy. I hear you. You're looking for someone who's financially

00:14:15.020 stable because you're financially stable. So there are plenty of wealthy men that eat an In-N-Out

00:14:20.680 burger. They eat at- Yeah, they're actually, I would say they're more likely to eat there.

00:14:25.080 um because they like they don't like spending money chipotle you've got to start going to new

00:14:32.220 places trying new things i get it you could get like the salad bowl it's good this isn't bad

00:14:36.540 advice actually you go to cheaper places women go to expensive places thinking the only guys

00:14:42.520 going to expensive places are generally players they're there for the women they're not there for

00:14:46.520 the food except steak houses is the exception i've seen men like a good state kind of like a salad

00:14:52.360 Mexican style. Right. And so you're going to want to go to places with high protein because men

00:14:57.720 don't like sugary stuff to Chipotle. I do an ESPN, uh, the Drew Diener show every morning and

00:15:03.840 or once a week. And he said, Katie, I talked to the manager at Chipotle and he said, yeah,

00:15:08.440 it's mostly men that come into Chipotle. So there you go. This is how we start to think

00:15:13.800 different and get a new approach. And I want to see you in my getting to taking course.

00:15:17.260 if you are that woman okay i i've actually this is not the worst dating coach for women i've ever

00:15:23.180 seen if you want to get married if you're like they are gonna always teach you to do beta bucks

00:15:28.700 it depends what you want i've never seen a woman teach you how to get alphas it's always just

00:15:33.100 trying to convince women not to get them anymore katie i need some light speed right you i always

00:15:38.060 did all right so let's get going so number four so where are they katie okay here's your answer

00:15:43.740 everywhere. Single men are everywhere. And you are just on your phone walking around, right? I had

00:15:51.020 a woman say, well, Katie, these guys are always on their phone, looking at their phone. How am I

00:15:54.760 supposed to approach them? They feel the same way about you. So put your phone down, give a smile,

00:16:02.440 try to look a little cuter, whatever it takes to motivate is what I like to say. And you'd be

00:16:06.980 surprised. You don't always have to have your makeup done and your hair. I've been walking

00:16:11.460 around big lots before in my blue workout pants. I'm telling you those blue workout pants get a

00:16:16.700 lot of views, um, more than my black, but I had my hair in a bun and I was just like, you know,

00:16:23.580 you've all seen me. I do the bun hair quite often. And sure enough, I got hit on in big lots. So,

00:16:28.920 and again, you never know what kind of man is in big lots. So don't poo poo a man who was in big

00:16:33.940 lots. Cause he might be very wealthy and he might just be your perfect guy. That's even more what

00:16:38.920 we're looking for. But here is a quick list of concentrated locations where you will find

00:16:44.880 many, many men. I actually, I hate to say this is not the worst female dating coach I've seen.

00:16:51.260 Now I did a post a little, a little while ago with my husband's car. Now he's a 1971 mock.

00:16:58.240 And I tell you what, we roll up to a hotel and everybody wants to come and look at the car and

00:17:03.420 talk to us. People roll down their windows. They thumb up us. Everybody is super into this car.

00:17:08.580 And so number one, car shows. Ladies, get a cool car. Learn a little bit about cars. So here is my list. I made this post with me and the car, and I wrote all the places I could think of. And then, of course, the guys added as well. So I'm going to share with you what I wrote and what all the guys wrote. All right, the concentrated location of good men. Now, there's men everywhere, but we want to find the good men. And I think the good man is financially stable. He's excited. He's focused.

00:17:37.080 Rokishi's a gold digger, but these are not, if your goal is gold digging, it's not bad advice.

00:17:43.480 I try to take out morality out of this. All of these things that I'm going to share with you

00:17:47.700 means you have a passion about something. So for example, we talked about car shows. All right.

00:17:52.660 Not just car shows, but how about a boating show? How about gun shows? I know. Yeah. Because men

00:17:58.320 like toys, you know, they like trucks. They let, yeah. You don't like that, but I'm telling you

00:18:04.000 what? You want a manly man who's going to keep you safe at night. I highly recommend a gun show.

00:18:09.380 What about Glamis? If you've ever heard of anything like Glamis, ATVing, they're out doing

00:18:14.500 the manly things. Now we all know, this is my number one place I tell you to go ladies, golf.

00:18:19.800 You don't have to be good at golf. All you have to do is try. That's literally all these men care

00:18:24.080 about. Now, if you're good and you're practicing and you've got a little handle on it, even better.

00:18:28.700 Golf, tennis. I know pickleball is kind of the in thing. You can meet men there as well.

00:18:34.000 try that uh you could go to any like pro amateur golf tournaments uh the tennis tournament in new

00:18:40.480 york was just happening now sadly i'm not that into tennis but even if you're not if you're in

00:18:46.000 that general area people are going to lunch people are going out for drinks after the you know these

00:18:51.280 amateur or these uh pro uh tournaments okay these are not i i'm actually kind of impressed i thought

00:18:57.520 this was going to be something i'd make fun of her this is not the worst advice for women actually

00:19:02.800 get into male hobbies you've got to be i can't believe this oh my god i never thought i'd

00:19:08.160 say this in that area and kind of move to where you think those people will be going

00:19:12.960 you know location wise uh what about rodeos y'all can come visit me here in texas i have yet to go

00:19:19.360 to i've never been to a rodeo so i can't speak rodeo but stagecoach things like that stagecoach

00:19:24.400 was a little young but rodeos would be fun and men in boots so cute concerts jazz music when

00:19:31.760 when you go to a jazz, uh, I love jazz. When you go to a jazz show, it's always a smaller

00:19:36.300 instrument venue. I don't have anything about jazz. You you're going to have the single guy

00:19:40.000 sitting at the bar, go by yourself, which by the way, I did talk about when you, when you need a

00:19:45.820 new approach, you've got to learn to go by yourself. So that's podcast 44 going out by

00:19:50.200 yourself. I give you all the best tips on that. All right. Hotel lobbies conventions. I know you

00:19:56.140 probably don't like this one but Vegas if you're in Vegas during the CES during March Madness

00:20:02.160 find out where those guys are be friendly be mindful as well though but but nonetheless if

00:20:07.740 there's a finance convention going on at a Ritz Carlton near you that's where you need to head to

00:20:12.480 sit at the bar by yourself I don't care just tell them you got off of work or you're you're

00:20:17.200 traveling who cares we just need you to get out there trying it somebody said the bourbon aisle

00:20:21.760 know a little bit about whiskeys, tequila tastings. How about a steakhouse? Always a good

00:20:26.300 idea. She's good. Okay. This is not Chipotle. Another good idea. Um, what about a men's group?

00:20:32.480 I know my husband's church has a men's group of 300 men. They're having their, their Friday night

00:20:37.880 meeting coming up and they need women to volunteer. So if that's your thing, you definitely want to

00:20:42.000 find a godly man. What about at your kids events? No, I'm not saying look for the dad on the same

00:20:47.400 team look across the field and see if there's a cute dad okay spartan races whoo i have been to

00:20:54.360 a few there are some good-looking studs marathons triathlons um college sports events pro sports

00:21:01.240 events ladies men are everywhere are you seeing what i'm saying yeah okay this is actually good

00:21:07.720 advice because usually women go out looking for men at places women like so you know what i i'm

00:21:13.880 I'm going to co-sign this dating coach.

00:21:15.800 A little bit of a gold digger, but it's all right.

00:21:17.980 You know, that's women.

00:21:19.860 Anyways, guys, let me know what you think in the comments.

00:21:21.780 Am I off base or was there something I missed?

00:21:23.720 Let me know and I'll see you next time.

Pearl - March 03, 2026

Where Have All The Good Men Gone？？

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