Pearl - August 07, 2026


Why Women Are Done Dating Divorced Men (Their Words, Not Mine)


Episode Stats


Length

12 minutes

Words per minute

189.94

Word count

2,468

Sentence count

43

Harmful content

Misogyny

11

sentences flagged

Toxicity

1

sentences flagged

Hate speech

4

sentences flagged


Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 women women divorce good men all the time um actually they don't divorce bad men what's up
00:00:06.000 guys welcome to my reaction series so today we're reacting to women complaining about divorced men
00:00:10.800 so a lot of times men try to do the right thing they get married they find a good woman they so
00:00:15.840 they think they love her and then she ruins his life and destroys him emotionally so he goes out
00:00:21.040 and pumps and dumps women so now older women that are getting pumped and dumped he might take a young
00:00:26.000 woman seriously but old women definitely pumping and dumped especially if they're divorced too 0.71
00:00:29.680 because he's like you did it to someone i'm going to do it to you um and now the women are 1.00
00:00:35.360 complaining about getting pumped and dumped by these new demons also guys we're doing private
00:00:40.560 dinners in new york city in dallas um less than 20 people you'll get to hang out with me there's a
00:00:45.280 link to it in the description if you're interested or if you just want information fill out the google
00:00:49.200 form advice at all here's my life advice as a 42 year old woman believe what you hear with a grain
00:00:57.760 in assault. Just don't believe it. Don't believe you know everything. You don't know all the
00:01:01.860 details. You don't know. You don't know. You don't know. Especially if you're dating a man that has
00:01:08.820 children with a woman or multiple women. If they're angry or disgruntled with him, towards him,
00:01:17.340 whatever, it's for a reason. You don't know the whole story. He's not giving you the whole story.
00:01:23.400 He's not going to give you the whole story because then he has to admit what he's done wrong.
00:01:29.200 Why the baby mama is upset.
00:01:32.360 I've done it. 0.99
00:01:33.900 I was married.
00:01:34.980 I believe the whole story I was told I took up for him fiercely, fiercely, fiercely, only to find out she was concerned for her child only because she knew of the revolving door previously.
00:01:51.200 women are so much more likely to believe women than men and you know men lie i'm not in this 0.85
00:01:55.440 camp that men don't lie they absolutely do lie um but women will lie and then back each other up
00:02:02.880 she knew of the woman previously she knew that he likes low caliber women previously she knew
00:02:11.360 she knew she knew everything i didn't know she knew she knew and so when you get the stories
00:02:19.120 from a man just know you're just hearing this little piece of it you're not hearing the whole
00:02:24.640 story don't be angry with her actually don't even say a word don't say a word until you're married
00:02:30.720 for about a year sit back and watch sit back and watch time tells its own story don't believe
00:02:38.100 everything you're told his ego will not admit to what he did and why the baby mom is mad nine times
00:02:46.380 out of 10 true story he's not going to he's not going to he's not going to take accountability
00:02:51.580 it's not even in there so this is a projection everything women say about men um usually women
00:02:56.360 do so if a woman says he doesn't take accountability it's usually i didn't take 1.00
00:03:00.200 accountability in like their 40s and 50s and then think that they're going to get a hot young thing 1.00
00:03:04.460 probably aren't and here's why and it's not because there aren't women who want a guy in
00:03:09.420 their like 40s and 50s i am one of them i am very much attracted to men who are 20 30 years my
00:03:14.940 senior i always have maybe i have daddy issues but the biggest red flag is they have no friends
00:03:21.260 and i mean like real friends i'm talking about the friends who will like drop everything to visit you
00:03:26.600 in hospital the friends you can ask for a liver real people who deeply know you and will go well
00:03:32.960 out of their way to help you and your family and it's honestly not really even men's fault because
00:03:37.360 men are socialized to make friends in a completely different way that women are women make friends
00:03:42.420 through bonding we have conversations we just go run errands together our bonding and our friendship
00:03:47.620 is based on our time and experiences together where men tend to do activities with each other
00:03:53.220 so if they go golfing and then they stop golfing because of an injury they just lose all their
00:03:58.660 friends their friendships tend to be very activity based and men are also very much socialized not to
00:04:03.540 ask for help and to never talk about their feelings which means that all of that emotional intimacy
00:04:08.420 and labor tends to fall on their romantic partner because that's the only person that men you know
00:04:13.540 she's actually spitting a little bit because when men don't have friends they do start to confide in
00:04:17.620 the woman and that's hell on earth that is hell on earth you cannot do that society are allowed
00:04:23.940 to be vulnerable with there's also a whole lot of reasons why a man in their 50s would be isolated
00:04:28.660 maybe they were in an abusive relationship and were completely isolated from everyone they knew
00:04:33.220 or had carer responsibilities and so a lot of their friends became distant because they just
00:04:37.940 just didn't have time mental health issues look the list goes on but just because it isn't your
00:04:42.520 fault doesn't mean that it's not your responsibility to fix i've met a lot of men who are very
00:04:47.420 successful very attractive charismatic great in the bedroom well into their 50s and 60s but i just
00:04:53.600 know if we started dating i would be all of their emotional labor i would be their therapist their
00:04:58.760 mother their best friend their girlfriend yeah because a lot of these guys getting divorced are
00:05:02.900 blue-pilled that's why the relationship ended all of their acquaintances all in one and it's
00:05:07.640 too much you really need a tribe and it's incredibly hard to build one because not many
00:05:12.220 people want to be in a tribe they just want to have one they don't want to be a tribal member
00:05:16.540 but after sleeping with tens of thousands of men for money most of my clients end up breaking up
00:05:21.260 because they put so much emotional weight and responsibility on their wives while giving not
00:05:26.760 very much in return that yeah okay okay let's see what this girl says unless you watch this entire 0.98
00:05:32.480 video and if you have dated a divorced dad ladies you need to help one another out here and leave 0.73
00:05:39.440 your warnings in the comments i actually think divorced guys are great today i disagree i know
00:05:44.240 what you're thinking especially um because if they have young kids they're really not on demon time
00:05:51.440 um the same way because i don't have as much time oh he's divorced too oh he has kids too
00:05:56.880 he understands what i've been through it's worth repeating women don't divorce good husbands so if
00:06:03.520 he's divorced and she didn't have a severe personality disorder or mental illness a horrible
00:06:10.240 substance abuse problem or some other justice women divorce good men all the time um actually
00:06:16.560 they don't divorce bad men will reason why he's just a good guy that got the short end of the
00:06:21.040 stick you need to do your due diligence and find out the real truth not just what he's telling you
00:06:26.320 these are just a few red flags that i've seen over the years and i've seen dating in my experience
00:06:31.600 if he's doing this with the kids it's going to cause problems for you and him if any of his
00:06:36.640 children are still sleeping in bed with him he's probably not ready to date if he doesn't give his
00:06:41.360 kids any chores or any responsibilities because he just wants their time together to be fun that's
00:06:46.880 going to cause a problem for you down the line if he's bribing or spoiling his kids the classic
00:06:51.200 disney dad he's more concerned about them liking him than he is about raising them right if he
00:06:56.960 posts excessive photos of him and his kids on social media it could very well be because he
00:07:01.440 wants the rest of the world to think he's such a good dad if he expects you to step in and
00:07:06.240 discipline or care for the kids early on or he takes their side over yours always making you
00:07:11.680 feel like the bad guy that's a problem if he doesn't instill in his kids any sort of work
00:07:16.880 ethic at all they're not required to have a job if he's not teaching them basic independent skills
00:07:21.840 who the are you ladies dating you know you guys are telling on yourselves things like they're not
00:07:26.720 getting themselves dressed by a very appropriate age they're not required to get jobs at a very
00:07:32.240 appropriate age they don't do things like know how to pump their own gas aren't handling things that
00:07:38.080 they should be handling again by certain appropriate ages he's not preparing them to
00:07:42.960 stand on their own two feet he wants them to depend and rely on him far too long if he's all
00:07:48.240 smiles out in public but loses his school with them in private problem if he gives them money
00:07:53.120 anytime they ask without any hesitation again because he just wants to be liked and if he can't
00:07:58.480 say no to his kids he's just a yes man this is your warning don't date this man i know i'm okay
00:08:05.520 let's see who's next um biggest red flag when dating a divorced man that i am all for dating
00:08:10.800 a divorced man, but I do have one red flag that I would be cautious of when dating a divorced man.
00:08:19.440 Doesn't mean I won't because I, I do learn my lesson, but sometimes I don't. Anyways,
00:08:26.160 if a divorced man bashes his ex or obsessively talks about his ex-wife, that is a red flag in
00:08:34.960 my opinion. And if you're asking who is this lady lecturing me about what divorce men to date and
00:08:41.260 not date, I'm Courtney. I have only dated divorce men since 2020, not by intention. I think it's
00:08:48.980 just a life statistic thing. But anyways, I have very much become experienced with healed and
00:08:55.700 unhealed divorce men. And one very, very big red flag is if they bash or obsessively talk about
00:09:04.040 their ex-wife. It does not always mean they are not over their ex. It may mean they are not over
00:09:09.820 the marriage. It may mean they have not healed from the fallout of the marriage, but I have found
00:09:15.280 generally speaking in all cases, if they do this, that is not a good outcome for me. It generally
00:09:21.240 means they are not ready for another relationship. And honestly, who wants to listen to their partner
00:09:27.620 bash or obsessively talk about their ex? Yeah. Well, a lot of the men are traumatized
00:09:33.300 and you get them out and women we don't you can't give your trauma to a woman because we'll just
00:09:38.720 abuse you like you see this abuse he's opening up and she look at her eyes i don't want to hear
00:09:44.160 about that be fair men don't want to hear about it either but you know so of the five divorced men
00:09:50.400 that i've dated two of them did not bash or obsessively talk about their ex and when i say
00:09:56.360 divorced i mean divorced or going through their divorce because i have dated three men who were
00:10:01.500 still actively going through the divorce process, one of which filed their divorce while we were
00:10:06.960 dating. But so one of the men that did not bash or obsessively talk about his ex got his divorce
00:10:16.380 papers while we were dating or the like final copy to sign or whatever. And that's when he got
00:10:23.960 really weird and kind of ended things with me. And that is the one divorced man who is back with his
00:10:31.020 ex-wife is the one who did not bash or obsessively talk about his ex there's another one who didn't
00:10:36.860 bash or obsessively talk about his ex but he was already fully divorced and had been for a couple
00:10:41.400 years so i just feel like it just feel like it was already processed like it was it was good uh
00:10:47.820 but the other one that did but did not talk negatively about his ex um or just in general
00:10:54.060 like obsessed about her was actually the one that got back together with her pick your poison ladies
00:11:00.900 sorry let's use next i've been on a decent amount tell me what happened dates with divorced men
00:11:06.260 i'm almost 42 so it's a mixed bag out there and i'm so curious if other men or women are having
00:11:13.480 this similar experience so maybe it's my fault for opening pandora's box but when i go on a date
00:11:20.000 with a divorced man i'd like to know what was the catalyst behind the divorce because it teaches me
00:11:25.220 a lot, and I can pick up on red flags. Now, I have noticed a lot of men will vent to me about how
00:11:32.420 awful their ex-wife was. Hold on. Now, I don't lack empathy, and I know there are crappy women 0.59
00:11:41.080 out there, but at the end of the day, I'm a girl's girl, and when they're done venting,
00:11:46.680 you know, I empathize, I listen. I say, well, if I was having dinner with your ex-wife,
00:11:51.980 what would she say about you what would she say about you some of them are caught off guard and 0.78
00:12:01.060 some are like which I appreciate they're like oh shoot she would tear me apart yes she would
00:12:06.300 so I really wish there was a website for like divorcees that can tell me what their ex-husbands
00:12:11.820 were like the second thing because I'm a girl's girl if they have kids okay and they refer to the
00:12:21.180 mother of their children as baby mama, I say, whoa, whoa, whoa. She delivered your children.
00:12:28.480 What is her name? Don't give me that baby mama crap. I don't have kids. I don't want kids, 1.00
00:12:33.900 but all you mamas out there deserve to be called by your name, not baby mama. 0.84
00:12:38.540 So I'm curious if this is a similar experience for people in the dating world, dating people. 1.00
00:12:45.500 Yeah, here, this is kind of an example of how women will get information out of you just to 0.63
00:12:49.380 use it against you don't do it fellas don't do it don't open up to women ever all right guys i love
00:12:55.260 you thanks for watching like the video if you can subscribe to the channel um and i'll see you next
00:12:59.240 time