Pearl - October 02, 2024


Why WOMEN Must GIVE UP Their TYPE To Get MARRIED | Pearl Daily


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 29 minutes

Words per minute

155.72047

Word count

13,947

Sentence count

270

Harmful content

Misogyny

45

sentences flagged

Toxicity

21

sentences flagged

Hate speech

44

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In order for women to get married, do we have to give up our type? Today we are going to talk about women and their types. We will talk about how important it is to have a good type in order for a woman to get a good husband.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 good afternoon good evening ladies and gentlemen welcome to another episode of pearl daily i am
00:00:14.100 your host pearl and this is the just pearly things youtube channel if you guys want to support my
00:00:19.800 work please go to the audacity network.com because we are currently demonetized and that supports
00:00:25.000 our documentaries getting guests on the show and upping our production quality thank you guys so
00:00:29.980 much for watching so today's topic is that we are going to be talking about women and their types
00:00:36.860 in order for women to get married do we have to give up our type but before we get to the topic
00:00:44.540 today's show is sponsored by chalk.com testosterone levels are so low and something needs to be done
00:00:51.180 about it chalk is on a mission to save mankind from extinction by boosting your vitality when
00:00:57.660 When you boost your testosterone, you'll have more mental clarity.
00:01:00.860 You know better.
00:01:03.280 You're more capable of making decisions, taking risks,
00:01:06.700 and having high testosterone will also affect your pheromones,
00:01:10.360 so women will find you more attractive subconsciously.
00:01:13.460 Get the Chalk Male Vitality Stack on chalk.com. 0.97
00:01:17.480 That's C-H-O-Q.com.
00:01:19.600 Chalk provides the highest quality herbal supplements clinically studied to boost your testosterone.
00:01:24.120 Their tongue cat is wild harvested from the Malaysian rainforest and is studied in double-blind human trial to boost free testosterone levels 87% in 21 days.
00:01:36.980 Use my name, Pearl, as your coupon code, and you'll get 25% off site-wide on chalk.com.
00:01:45.280 That's C-H-O-Q.com, coupon code Pearl. 0.99
00:01:49.220 Boost your testosterone naturally and supercharge your masculinity.
00:01:52.600 Don't be a simp. 1.00
00:01:54.120 okay so today we want to talk about women and their types so i want to talk about a woman
00:02:05.700 that i knew when i was in school so this woman was somebody that i i was a transfer so i went 1.00
00:02:15.220 to one school and then i transferred to another school to play volleyball and this woman had a 0.98
00:02:20.120 particular type. And everyone knew on the team what her type was, because anytime she would go 1.00
00:02:27.260 on a date with a guy, talk to a guy, have a boyfriend, he would always look a certain way.
00:02:34.620 Now, around my senior year, she dated a guy that looked nothing like the men that she dated in the
00:02:41.180 past, had a completely different look. So they were dating. He was nice enough. I met him a
00:02:47.340 couple times and one of um the most red pilling moments was i was at a it's like a day party
00:02:57.020 darties i don't know if you guys have been to school you already know um where everyone during
00:03:01.400 the day they go out have drinks and i think it was homecoming or something like that
00:03:06.460 now this woman ends up cheating on her boyfriend with one of her ex-boyfriends at that party
00:03:14.900 and this to me signaled that she was dating a man that she wasn't really attracted to 0.98
00:03:22.300 however many women have the issue that their type doesn't stay for long-term commitment 1.00
00:03:32.500 so I wanted to go through a couple TikToks where women kind of talk about this dilemma
00:03:41.420 or I wanted to show a TikTok because a lot of times you guys say, Pearl, you're just making
00:03:46.680 this stuff up. And then you can go on TikTok and find the exact thing that I'm talking about. So
00:03:53.360 this is sort of a trend and I've seen this a couple of times. Here, let me pull this up.
00:04:00.340 So she says having to say goodbye to my type because I'm trying to get married.
00:04:05.600 so what does this mean so as you guys know women we date let me find let me go down to the better
00:04:22.440 zoom in on this okay as you know women we are hypergamous so and dating app data shows this
00:04:30.380 there's two data points that you can find that we date a small percentage of men and
00:04:37.740 that we on some level are designed to share men. One is that we have more than twice as many
00:04:47.120 female ancestors as we have male ancestors. I want to say 3,000 years ago, it was eight men
00:04:56.920 or eight women to one man the second data point is dating apps um it shows we only swipe right
00:05:05.800 between five to twenty percent of the time if you want to be super generous we can give thirty
00:05:11.320 percent um but in general that's the number one way people are meeting in 2024.
00:05:19.480 a lot of people will say that um dating apps aren't real life and i do agree with that but
00:05:26.360 if we're going to look at marriage results today um according to jewelers and people that are
00:05:33.080 selling engagement rings apparently hinge is the number one app that people are getting married on
00:05:38.840 and even on hinge we're sharing that and so essentially what you get is the men and if you
00:05:47.080 look at the chart the men that get all the women so these are like eights nines and tens these are
00:05:53.160 the rest um so these are the men that are invisible to women these are the men that
00:05:59.800 tend to get relationships but they don't get hookups or they're not selected for hookups
00:06:05.400 and then the the top men are the ones that are hooking up with everybody right
00:06:10.200 this makes a lot of people uncomfortable but you can go on tick tock and find women confirming this
00:06:16.920 and like a lot of women they just use tiktok as their diary so you can go on tiktok and literally
00:06:23.400 find women confirming this or um you can take dating app data or the third data point is that
00:06:32.480 there are twice as many women in relationships as men so either option a women are dating
00:06:43.100 significantly older or sorry under 30 a third of men are virgins or haven't had sex in the past year
00:06:48.740 and there are twice as many women in relationships as men so that tells us either women are dating
00:06:56.360 significantly older that's a possibility but to me what would be more likely is that women are
00:07:03.740 sharing men because we've always done that throughout all of history and it would it would
00:07:10.660 be rational to me to think that we would do that today. Now a lot of times
00:07:18.520 conservatives we look at the 1950s as this golden era or the 1920s and I think this is and I've done
00:07:28.000 this before but I think this is a common trope where we romanticize the past and we think that
00:07:37.020 there was some golden era or golden age where it was just so amazing to be alive.
00:07:44.180 The way that I view it is that each generation has a different set of problems. So instead of
00:07:50.040 going into World War I or World War II, our generation just has a hard time with relationships.
00:07:55.660 um and what we found out is
00:08:03.400 the last hundred years women have fought very very hard to not have to be with men they are not 0.89
00:08:15.300 attracted to to me this is what feminism is at its core because when you look at feminist writings 0.86
00:08:25.780 generally what they're fighting for is reproductive freedom on on some level um 0.99
00:08:33.140 margaret sanger most of her writings are about getting on the pill access to abortion so so what
00:08:42.180 what is abortion on a root level it's women saying i do not want to reproduce with men
00:08:48.900 that i do not deem fit then we got no fault divorce and what is that saying what are women
00:08:56.020 saying in that i do not want to stay with a man that i am not attracted to or that i do not like
00:09:04.500 and unfortunately what we found out in the last hundred years
00:09:08.740 is that when we are given the freedom to do anything we want
00:09:12.740 most women do not like most men that much and people kind of get on me for saying this 0.56
00:09:22.040 but every data point is going to tell you that that is true you gave women the freedom to do 0.62
00:09:28.460 anything and they are more likely to pick sex work in their youth than they are marriage what
00:09:37.980 What does that tell you?
00:09:39.480 Okay, so this isn't a happy truth.
00:09:42.420 This isn't a, because a lot of times when I talk, people think I'm applying morality
00:09:48.120 onto it, that it's good or bad.
00:09:50.360 I am simply analyzing what's going on.
00:09:53.800 So when yesterday we had a debate on the channel and we had a content creator and a woman come
00:10:01.760 on and one of the things they spoke about was that many pickup artists and PUA's have
00:10:07.480 a three date rule where if a woman does not sleep with a man on a three date rule
00:10:14.120 the men are instructed to move on I've heard Myron say this now why is that before we judge
00:10:21.960 it and we say that is a terrible thing degeneracy men are problem solvers and what men don't want
00:10:33.160 be is in a position where their wife is not attracted to them so some men see the easiest
00:10:40.600 solution to be she has this amount of time to sleep with me or I am going to assume that she's
00:10:47.160 not attracted to me I'm not saying that's right I'm not saying that's wrong but I'm saying that
00:10:52.440 is a solution that many men have come up with so I wanted to read an article by Rolo Tomasi
00:10:59.880 talking about genuine desire. And I want to talk about what that is. So
00:11:06.400 this is called the desire dynamic. It's on the rationalmail.com.
00:11:14.560 You cannot negotiate desire. This is a very simple principle that most men and the vast
00:11:20.460 majority of women are willfully ignorant of. One of the most common personal problems I've 0.98
00:11:26.160 been asked for advice on the last 10 years is some variation of how do I get her back? Usually this
00:11:32.260 breaks down into men seeking some sort of methodology to return his relationship to an
00:11:37.820 earlier state where a previously passionate woman couldn't keep her hands off of him. Six months in
00:11:45.420 to a comfortable familiarity and the thrill is gone but in truth it's the genuine desire that is
00:11:51.900 gone. It's often at this stage that a man will resort to negotiation. Sometimes this can be
00:11:58.160 as subtle as him progressively doing things for her in hopes that she'll reciprocate
00:12:04.660 with the same sexual fervor that they used to have. So this is where you see
00:12:10.540 women like Katy Perry on that podcast saying that her husband has to do chores 0.89
00:12:18.800 in order to get her to have sex with him she is not actually attracted to him
00:12:26.840 and so he has to negotiate the attraction other times a married couple may go to counseling
00:12:34.080 to resolve their issues and negotiate terms for her sexual compliance he'll promise to do the
00:12:39.780 dishes and a load of laundry more in exchange for her feigned sexual interest in him yet no matter
00:12:45.400 what terms are offered no matter how great an external effort he makes so deserving of reward
00:12:51.480 the genuine desire is not there for her in fact she feels worse for not having the desire after
00:12:57.000 such efforts were made for her compliance negotiated desire only ever leads to obligated compliance
00:13:04.600 this is why her post negotiation sexual response is so often lackluster and the source of even
00:13:11.400 further frustration on his part. She may be more sexually available to him, but the half-hearted
00:13:17.420 experience is never the same when they first met and there was no negotiation,
00:13:22.440 just spontaneous desire for each other. From a male perspective, and particularly that of an
00:13:29.860 uninitiated beta male, negotiation of desire seems like a rational solution to the problem.
00:13:36.260 men tend to innately rely on deductive reasoning otherwise known as an if-then logic stream 0.98
00:13:43.420 the code is something like this i need sex plus women have the sex i want plus curry women with 0.99
00:13:51.840 about their oh ask women about their conditions for sex plus meet their prerequisites for sex 0.99
00:13:59.280 equals the sex i want so this is also when men try to qualify to women for their lists
00:14:04.740 um they're essentially even though women will sleep with broke musicians um personal trainers
00:14:12.980 men that don't have anything together right okay so make it make sense it's simple economics but 0.69
00:14:20.800 built on a foundation that relies on a woman's accurate self-evaluations the genuine desire they
00:14:26.520 used to experience at the onset of their relationship was predicted upon a completely
00:14:31.580 unknown set of variables. Overtly communicating a desire for reciprocal desire creates obligation
00:14:38.440 and sometimes even ultimatums. Genuine desire is something a person can come to
00:14:43.640 or be led to on their own politician. You can force a woman by threat to comply with behaving 1.00
00:14:51.220 in a desired manner, but you cannot make her want to behave that way. A prostitute will F you for 1.00
00:14:58.600 an exchange it doesn't mean that she wants to whether a long-term relationship or one night 0.52
00:15:04.200 stands strive for genuine desire desire in your relationships half of the battle is knowing you
00:15:10.440 want to be with a woman who wants to please you not one who feels obligated to you will never
00:15:17.400 draw this genuine desire from her by overt means but you can covertly lead her to this genuine
00:15:23.080 desire. The trick is provoking real desire and keeping her ignorant of your intent to provoke
00:15:28.700 it. Real desire is created by her thinking it's something she wants, not something she has to do.
00:15:35.960 So I think the most important sentence here is that genuine desire is when women want to
00:15:44.640 listen to you or they want to please you, not that they feel like they have to.
00:15:49.540 Now, why is this important? Because there is a debate going in on Twitter right now. And the
00:16:01.300 question is, women feel genuine desire for a very small percentage of men. It's rare.
00:16:12.080 so what do we do as a society moving forward do women compromise on their type and marry men
00:16:25.400 they're not attracted to and as a man do you want a woman to marry you if she's not attracted to you
00:16:31.820 the reason I ask this is because and she's been on the show there's a woman named Lori
00:16:39.000 talking about how she did not initially have genuine desire for her husband but they stuck it
00:16:47.160 out stuck it out and now they've been happily married for years so let me when i first met him
00:16:55.160 i would i won't tell you how you stress or anything because i don't want to embarrass him but
00:17:00.120 i was not attracted physically to him but i just there weren't those butterflies and the things
00:17:06.180 that I thought should be there with a man that I was supposedly in love with and he said to me
00:17:11.660 how would you like to be Mrs. Alexander and I said sure you know that was it no ring no going on his
00:17:19.480 knee no nothing you know and so and I wasn't that excited though and we argued a lot about everything
00:17:27.520 we didn't get along that great I felt like he stole my joy I don't know what was wrong with me
00:17:32.920 So I went on my wedding day, and, you know, none of those butterflies were exciting.
00:17:38.820 I'd go to my bridal showers, and none of that.
00:17:41.260 It was just like this emptiness.
00:17:42.780 It was like, why don't I have that in me?
00:17:44.880 I don't like this.
00:17:45.800 I want to be on butterflies.
00:17:46.940 I'm so excited.
00:17:49.040 But I, you know, we discussed that marriage, divorce would never be in our vocabulary.
00:17:56.380 So we got married.
00:17:57.560 and the first 20 years were rough because I was still critical so now that I've been married 0.99
00:18:05.260 almost 44 years I can tell you women that love is not an emotion and that is a really shaky 0.65
00:18:13.000 unstable ground to build your marriage upon so anyway women remember just because you maybe
00:18:20.840 lost the butterflies and the emotions and the feelings for your husband that's not love well 0.53
00:18:27.200 I'm going to be going to church soon, and I will learn in silence with all submission.
00:18:31.560 Okay, so I listen to this, and I don't hear anything that's innately wrong, right?
00:18:39.440 We don't want divorce. 0.79
00:18:41.460 Divorce is bad for children.
00:18:43.360 Most men or most women cannot marry men that they're attracted to. 0.92
00:18:50.040 There are just not enough to go around. 0.99
00:18:52.280 When we look at who women select for sex, there are simply not enough. 0.99
00:19:00.220 So the question is to men, would you be happy with this kind of marriage? 0.97
00:19:06.440 Some men may say yes.
00:19:08.200 Some men may say no.
00:19:10.140 Now, you can identify, I found another person marriage on the other side.
00:19:20.220 Where did I?
00:19:20.980 Okay, let me find the link.
00:19:22.280 on the other hand this is a new york post article and goldie and this is a marriage that's built
00:19:32.700 on genuine desire so again what you get with a lot of marriages in the church is
00:19:42.040 obligated compliance because they're not doing it because they want to but because they're
00:19:48.820 obligated to i'm not saying that's right or that's wrong i'm just saying that's
00:19:54.260 two different types of marriages so goldie oh wait let me there's so many pop-ups one second guys 0.87
00:20:02.980 okay
00:20:07.300 okay goldie howen's secret to a four decade relationship with kurt russell
00:20:12.900 good sex goldie howan has a simple secret for why her four decade relationship with kurt 0.94
00:20:19.220 russell continues to be a success good sex because sex is something that connects you
00:20:25.580 and creates more belonging people who have healthy sexual relationships usually last longer
00:20:31.680 but it's not just because of the act it's because of the warmth and the intimacy that it creates
00:20:38.580 hahn told e-news at her in love gala celebration of the 20th anniversary of the goldie
00:20:45.440 hahn foundation in mind up la on september 27th she also quipped you have to be nice to each other
00:20:53.320 upon occasion the couple have been together since 1983 and they initially met on the set
00:20:58.980 on set in 1968 of the one and only genuine original family band but it would be years
00:21:07.600 until they officially became romantic they starred in the 1984 swing shift before reuniting on screen
00:21:14.720 again in the jerry marshall directed comedy overboard in 1987. you know you're not the same
00:21:21.920 person the now and then star explained over the weekend you don't think the same way oftentimes
00:21:26.640 and you have to accept that but you have to measure but you have to measure are we having fun and is
00:21:33.200 this something that we want to do do we laugh together do we share certain things you don't
00:21:38.580 have to share everything the first wives star continued we have a lot of expectation i think
00:21:45.200 around relationships but you have to like the person that's very important um han 78 and russell
00:21:54.100 73 have never married but are parents of the actor way why and russell 38 kurt also welcomed son
00:22:01.800 boston russell with the ex-wife season hubley and sean hahn is the mom of actors olivia and
00:22:09.560 kate hudson who she had with musician bill hudson kurt also spoke about their relationship while
00:22:15.000 they attended the event on friday most people have been together for a long time and i think
00:22:19.880 share one thing in common and that is after many years together you will have experienced just
00:22:25.620 about everything there is to experience together and understand all the ups and the downs of just
00:22:30.400 what it means i love the fact that we met and we're still doing it we like being together
00:22:35.360 um okay now that i mean we could go on but you guys get the idea so you have one school of thought
00:22:43.140 that says
00:22:46.280 even if the feelings aren't there you stay together and you are obligated to listen to your husband
00:22:57.920 and on the other hand a lot of people would see this as shallow right they would say well
00:23:06.100 it's just sex but if there's no sex what makes it different that you might as well just have
00:23:17.300 a friendship so it's two different schools of thought right and I'm not saying one's right
00:23:20.720 or wrong I'm just explaining them okay I think there was one more thing that she had let me
00:23:28.100 I should have pulled it up but I know there was one other post of hers that was going
00:23:36.640 oh let me let me list some of the responses because people are sort of freaking out so 1.00
00:23:42.140 Paul Benjamin he's another RP content creator this is what women sound like who didn't marry
00:23:48.200 her best choice decades later her husband would have no idea when he was courting her don't get
00:23:54.920 trapped into investing into a dead relationship because of the details you miss okay
00:24:01.120 and then there's one more story but I remember the story was basically 0.79
00:24:08.420 it was a woman asking her what to do should you have sex with your husband when you don't want to 0.56
00:24:15.760 and Lori was saying yes. So I want people to call in and I want them to tell me, do you think
00:24:30.720 that sexual desire is something necessary for a marriage to last or can women push through this? 0.64
00:24:40.460 and do you want a woman to stay who does not want to be there that's my question 1.00
00:24:50.120 um there seems to be school two schools of thought um one it is unwise for women to marry
00:24:59.780 men they're not attracted to or two in order for women to get married they must marry men they're
00:25:05.980 not attracted to because most of the men they're attracted to will not settle down now I don't know
00:25:12.800 I'm not saying one way or the other I'm just presenting the two schools of thought and I want
00:25:17.780 to hear from the people so we're going to put a zoom link in the chat and I have a couple rules
00:25:22.440 if you guys want to talk number one I need your face to be on camera so I need to I need please
00:25:30.740 don't walk around with your camera set it on a table um whatever I need to see your face I need
00:25:38.140 you to be sitting down okay the second thing I need from you guys is I don't want trolls calling
00:25:44.360 in and um I may have to cut you off if you're going on a tangent and it's just too long I need
00:25:53.240 keep the show going and you you may not over talk me this is my show and i need um i need to run the
00:26:02.600 show so i don't mean to be rude but at times i may have to do that if you're just if you keep going
00:26:09.240 okay so call in and there's two questions do you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last
00:26:19.080 do you want a woman to stay who does not want to be there
00:26:23.240 and I can today it's men or women so whoever calls in um can you text me this link too
00:26:35.480 because I'm about to send it to do you mind yeah okay cool just text it to my oh wait
00:26:41.620 I saw my email hold on because there's someone I know that um yeah yeah it's right here let
00:26:52.320 Let me send it, okay, sent to him. 0.99
00:27:17.680 me check the chat what you guys are saying they said no and yes I'm out rules she's free to leave 1.00
00:27:27.900 whenever she wants that's true but we know it's not that simple there are many women that want to
00:27:34.680 leave but their religion holds them back or but their family holds them back but their community
00:27:43.480 holds them back but their position holds them back. I'm not saying that's wrong. It's clearly
00:27:49.780 better for children but I want to have a serious conversation about this because we know the data
00:27:58.820 is telling us there are not enough men to go around for women. So knowing this
00:28:08.620 Do women marry men they're not attracted to or do women only marry men that they're attracted
00:28:23.380 to? 0.99
00:28:24.380 So do you want a woman to stay that doesn't want to be there?
00:28:29.160 And do you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last?
00:28:33.460 I want to hear all different points of view.
00:28:35.880 Please call in.
00:28:37.740 I'm not even giving my opinion on this. I want to hear from the people.
00:28:48.040 Not enough viable men and women, they're saying. Hello. Hey, how's it going, Pearl? I love your
00:28:54.840 show. You're amazing. Thank you. I'm good. How are you? Where are you? Good, good. Where are you?
00:29:01.680 Riverside, California. Riverside, California. How's the weather there today?
00:29:05.840 pretty hot in the 90s right now okay so i have two questions for you the first is
00:29:13.520 do you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last
00:29:17.380 desire like like attracted to the other person or yeah um
00:29:24.920 i i would say so i've been married for about 18 years so it's hard to say that you know i've been
00:29:33.280 attracted to my wife but anything in life you experience your ups and downs so if you work at
00:29:40.300 it i think that's all that matters you know um because a lot of times we emotionally go through
00:29:46.100 so many things you know and so it could be you have to work on it if you're having an issue with
00:29:51.400 attraction maybe go to the gym or do something like that to you know make yourself more attractive
00:29:56.560 but yeah i think it is very important but i think commitment is the most important thing you know
00:30:02.560 to work it out would you want a woman to stay who does not want to be there
00:30:09.840 yes yeah i would yes because i know how i feel you know i go through my ups and downs with my
00:30:17.040 own wife and so sometimes you don't want to be around them you know sometimes you have to
00:30:22.720 concentrate on what initially attracted you to that person in the first place and you know um
00:30:28.480 I'd want to work it out with her. I love my wife. So, you know, of course I want her to stay. We can
00:30:35.280 work it out. Okay. Okay. Thank you for calling in. I appreciate it. Take care. Bye-bye. Bye.
00:30:44.520 I'm going to, I'm going to pull this. So the guy number one says
00:30:49.920 first caller we have yes and yes um can i get the next caller please
00:31:01.460 oh we're just doing one at a time okay
00:31:10.500 um if you don't mind would you uh get off the line we're trying to get the next i'm trying to
00:31:21.780 i'm so sorry i know we're trying to figure it out on our end too hi donovan how are you hey good how
00:31:30.600 about you um can you hear me yeah i can hear you how okay how is it going where are you calling
00:31:35.580 from i'm calling from reno nevada sunny reno how's the weather out there weather is absolutely
00:31:42.940 beautiful um every every morning is just absolutely gorgeous out here i think the one break we had
00:31:50.620 in the weather was when we had the wildfires uh the davis wildfires out here a couple weeks ago
00:31:55.580 interestingly enough it was called the davis wildfires but but they they got it all contained
00:32:01.020 and um even you know it's interesting even when the wildfires were burning it was still a beautiful
00:32:06.460 day outside people are still i mean they're taking pictures they're walking their dogs they're you
00:32:11.180 know they're riding their bikes but but we're good man reno is oh i got this on reno is uh reno is a
00:32:16.780 beautiful beautiful place to live man it's probably one of the probably one of the best kept secrets
00:32:21.260 in the world so so if i'm being totally totally honest do not move here it's terrible
00:32:25.020 um yeah me and donovan guys we go way back um he saw me getting red pilled like before his eyes
00:32:33.380 i used to do it i used to do a show on his channel called like not all women or something
00:32:39.180 that's not all women i'll never forget the very first time i actually heard of you was when you
00:32:44.540 were you were responding to one of my videos about the black bachelor and about how the white girls
00:32:50.940 that will be on the bachelor will be summarily disqualified by oh yeah you know guys but i'm
00:32:56.940 gonna i gotta tell you pearl and just please if i may okay um you it appears that white guys care
00:33:04.940 a little bit less i'm not saying that they don't care anymore because i've talked to very attractive
00:33:10.140 women who have been talking to very attractive white guys that i know and they will tell me
00:33:15.100 they'll say hey look xyz's been in my dms but as soon as he found out that i dated a black dude
00:33:20.300 he ghosted me he never i never i never heard from him again but but by the same token i see more and
00:33:25.420 more that you know a lot of white dudes are like hey man i don't she really has dated black dudes
00:33:29.500 i'll still give her a shot so i mean it's definitely you're definitely right it's definitely
00:33:33.500 a thing uh it definitely is yes but the same way i mean men adapt they adapt to the market yeah
00:33:39.660 they do so um so the question did you see the whole stream at all or no um i'm looking at the
00:33:46.460 screen and i think you asked um you know why women must give up their type to get married
00:33:51.100 and i think you asked is sexual attraction uh necessary for the marriage to work
00:33:59.100 i'll just and and the question the answer to that is i don't know pearl the thing is this man
00:34:06.140 i say this to men all the time and you've got to understand this you will never ever ever be
00:34:11.100 a woman's best, biggest, first, or only. It's just not going to happen. And that includes me. 0.99
00:34:17.860 A lot of people say, well, Donovan, what about your wife? No, I'm not the biggest, best, first,
00:34:22.900 or only Devin has ever had. I assume that she is sexually attracted to me because she still
00:34:28.180 lets me have sex with her. But the truth is, Pearl, is I'll never really know if she's... 0.71
00:34:34.020 I'll never really know. All I know is that she allows me to have sex with her. 0.99
00:34:38.560 she shows that she's sexually attracted but i think what men have to resolve in their minds 0.90
00:34:42.840 is we just have to understand that actions speak louder than words and at the end of the day pearl
00:34:48.120 i can't imagine a woman having sex with a man she's not at least a little bit sexually attracted
00:34:53.900 to i have no and you and i we've had this conversation before we have no ego there's
00:34:58.580 no ego i'm not trying to be mr top dog or whatever the case may be as long as my woman stays attractive
00:35:04.180 to me and she at least pretends that she's attractive attracted to me i think i'm good
00:35:09.680 with it at least for now if that makes sense have you seen did you see the video i was watching 1.00
00:35:13.780 i did not okay so there is a woman that made a video talking about how basically she wasn't 0.98
00:35:20.480 attracted to her husband right and um now like she's publicly said that she has sex with him
00:35:29.180 when she doesn't want to and that she wasn't really attracted to him right do you if you
00:35:36.180 found that information out would you be okay to continue the relationship as long as she kept
00:35:41.540 sleeping with you it's a very very good question um i think the answer for me is yes um okay so
00:35:51.540 you don't need it then right no i just don't i mean i don't need it man i really don't and i
00:35:57.940 I think this, and please don't get me wrong, I understand a man's desire to be a woman's
00:36:04.520 best, but men, what we have to understand is we are never, we are very rarely going
00:36:11.180 to be as sexually attractive to the women that we are sexually attracted to.
00:36:17.440 Again, and I'm not going to sit here and say that I'm the best looking guy that Devin's
00:36:23.300 ever been with.
00:36:23.840 Like, and I've never seen nor heard because anytime those conversations, I don't, I don't
00:36:27.780 ever entertain that stuff, but I think really it has to do with just sort of destroying
00:36:32.180 your ego, man.
00:36:33.260 I think that is, and I know it's hard to do, but it's something that has to be done because
00:36:38.600 there, there comes a point.
00:36:40.600 There are no virgins anymore. 1.00
00:36:41.880 Pearl, women have access to every man in the universe. 1.00
00:36:45.220 It doesn't matter if you live in Amish country, as we've talked about before, it doesn't matter 1.00
00:36:49.680 if you live in a village.
00:36:50.740 I remember Andrew was telling me about a story.
00:36:52.820 this is a story him and Tristan were in some you know remote village in I think Estonia something
00:36:58.680 and there were there were beautiful girls all around and they appeared to not really have
00:37:03.120 access to the internet well they approached one of the girls fight come to find out she's got like
00:37:07.460 400,000 Instagram followers and they're like wow okay so the internet has certainly permeated
00:37:12.700 everywhere so as long as women have access and are aware of more sexually attractive guys you're
00:37:18.300 just never going to be the best she's ever had if you're if you got to be you got to be confident
00:37:24.320 enough in your mind to say hey look okay i'm not the biggest best first or only but she's still
00:37:28.420 here so i must be doing something right and for a lot of guys that's not good enough for me as far
00:37:32.400 as i'm concerned at my age i'm good with that yeah the other thing is um a lot of times the virgins
00:37:39.540 like i've met it's like fake because they've done all the other stuff yes like how are you
00:37:45.320 i mean that doesn't count no it does not i'm not saying i'm not saying they don't exist but you
00:37:52.380 you can never verify it you'll never really know because of dating like there's no way they can
00:37:56.900 know for sure well we you and i had this conversation uh down in dania beach florida
00:38:02.420 just pay attention if a girl tells she's a virgin just pay attention to the way she interacts with
00:38:07.160 people men women and if you have enough experience you'll be able to pick up on the fact okay this
00:38:12.180 woman says she's a virgin but she's not she doesn't have virginal qualities or characteristics 0.95
00:38:17.040 so second question do you want a woman to stay who doesn't want to be there
00:38:22.160 say again do you would you be okay with a woman staying who doesn't want to be there
00:38:27.980 stay no i'm not okay with that if she doesn't want to be here then then she can go yeah i'm
00:38:33.800 good with that yeah as far as the see what we have to understand guys is that we only have
00:38:38.920 what we have is sex what like one percent of the time we're actually with our our wives our
00:38:43.960 girlfriends okay that one little you know and it's not little it's big sex is sex is probably
00:38:50.320 the biggest thing that takes the least amount of time in a relationship and it means everything
00:38:54.400 and a lot of times it means nothing but if she doesn't want to be there that if she doesn't want
00:38:59.400 to be there that means she's probably not sexually attracted to you either so no she doesn't want to
00:39:03.220 be here i don't want her here okay well thank you donovan this is absolutely this is a great great
00:39:07.980 insight um tell the people where they can find you guys he has a really good channel so you
00:39:11.340 should go check it out yes yes yes yes donovan sharp about to break i'm about to start breaking
00:39:15.100 down love is blind uh season seven episode one uh uh tell glenn hi for me i see he's in there but
00:39:21.180 i see they're waiting on me so thanks for having me on pearl i appreciate it yeah thanks for coming
00:39:24.700 donovan thanks appreciate it bye yeah guys he has a course called womanese where he literally um
00:39:30.940 translate everything women say and what they mean it's really good actually i used to think he was
00:39:36.860 it was um nonsense when i first met him and i'm like no and then i interviewed a thousand women
00:39:42.780 and i was like oh my gosh he's right hi glenn how are you oh is he freezing
00:39:52.460 glenn get guys get your wi-fi together
00:39:58.060 um let me let me let me text him
00:40:02.620 glenn get your wi-fi
00:40:06.860 your wi-fi oh oh now there you go hi glenn how are you doing good i'm sorry i'm on set
00:40:19.100 right now uh filming so um you know the location doesn't have the
00:40:28.700 oh okay that's all right
00:40:29.900 um no the question is do women um do women settle for in order to get married right yeah
00:40:51.260 well yeah chatter tyrone ain't gonna take them
00:40:54.300 Tyrone are too busy banging her friends so what you don't have to do is you don't have
00:41:03.060 to get with you know that one guy that's been nice to her the whole time you know he meets
00:41:08.160 all the provider you know qualities that a woman would want but he he ugly he just doesn't 0.69
00:41:13.980 do it he doesn't do the arousal thing you know like and she's gonna have to pretend 0.73
00:41:19.980 but see i think women are the best actors because y'all got some grammy oscar dominating award
00:41:27.440 going on over there like oh yes i do love you really me i've loved you since day one
00:41:33.440 wow and then you get these guys caught them right into it so i mean it happens um but
00:41:41.600 the other question was um is sex important in a marriage well do you need sexual desire
00:41:49.320 in order for a marriage to last?
00:41:52.660 Well, yeah.
00:41:53.800 Yeah. 0.78
00:41:55.060 Because, you know, sex is the glue, right?
00:41:57.200 I would say, you could even say intimacy is the glue.
00:42:01.240 Because intimacy is...
00:42:04.060 Glenn, you are breaking up.
00:42:11.220 You're breaking up real bad.
00:42:13.240 Okay.
00:42:14.560 I'm sorry.
00:42:15.100 Oh, you're back.
00:42:16.200 You're back.
00:42:16.560 You're back.
00:42:16.860 You're okay.
00:42:17.380 Go ahead. 0.96
00:42:17.980 So you said sex is the glue. 0.74
00:42:20.600 Yeah.
00:42:21.420 You could say intimacy.
00:42:23.580 It's intimacy, right?
00:42:24.560 Intimate time between the two is what holds the relationship together.
00:42:29.700 It's the same thing I tell Christians with their prayer life with God, right?
00:42:34.260 In your private prayer life, that's your intimate time with God.
00:42:37.280 It's important.
00:42:38.040 If you don't have that, you're not going to be close to them.
00:42:40.480 If you ain't banging your wife, if there's no desire there from either one of you,
00:42:45.060 you guys are not going to be together.
00:42:46.620 You're going to be withdrawn.
00:42:47.240 you're gonna be distant and next thing you know you're gonna find out that she got with you know 0.95
00:42:53.240 somebody like donovan and then you got a little black baby named tyrone running around 0.69
00:42:57.080 so do you want a woman to stay that does not want to be there no why no because um 0.92
00:43:05.960 that's essentially what we found out right when women got birth control when they we got abort 0.73
00:43:10.920 like we got all these reproductive and like sexual freedom i mean it showed that most women don't
00:43:18.840 like most men and that they didn't like their husbands that much because the second they got
00:43:23.100 to leave they left right well the same thing is it's like well most husbands don't like their 0.89
00:43:27.840 wives either as soon as they start bitching and not giving sex they want romali anyway yeah i know
00:43:33.000 i know but men but men are good people so they stick it out right we just kind of hope that you 0.78
00:43:39.260 kind of get your act together and you start doing it right again they're like please please 0.77
00:43:44.000 yeah yeah um so you wouldn't want a woman to stay that doesn't want to be there what if you found 1.00
00:43:54.040 out that just like um these women making videos saying that they weren't initially attracted to 0.79
00:44:00.360 their husbands and now they just do it what if you found that out could you live with that 1.00
00:44:05.160 good wife outside of that, but she just, she doesn't like having sex. She just does it because 1.00
00:44:11.800 she has to. I don't care. Then I ain't got to worry about her orgasm.
00:44:21.720 Not my problem. Cool. Not my problem. I ain't got to, I don't got to do all the things I used to do. 0.97
00:44:27.320 You know, the crazy things. Yeah. I ain't got to do all that. Okay. Okay. Thank you very much,
00:44:32.880 glenn no problem i'll talk to you later okay bye bye oh wait glenn glenn well yeah yeah yeah say
00:44:40.800 your channel plug it sorry oh yeah uh glenn lawrence presents the production of men catch me there
00:44:47.520 i'll be on tonight probably reviewing actually your jubilee video as i get ready for my jubilee
00:44:56.720 on sunday oh okay yeah cool so we'll be reviewing yours on tonight so you know it's funny i haven't
00:45:04.000 even watched it i don't um they did you dirty they did you dirty i'm sure they did i'm sure
00:45:10.640 they edited like everything out i was like hey they did you real foul i was like god i know
00:45:17.600 i know they um the way it was set up i was like they really did not um one it wasn't really a
00:45:25.200 fair panel too they weren't letting me talk they would let the other person go on for like a year
00:45:31.040 and then three um i just figured they edited it out a lot i just figured well i'm wearing uh your
00:45:39.120 shirt that you gave me because it's like republican versus democrat and thought about voting like
00:45:44.880 just voting rights or so i'm wearing my women shouldn't vote shirt because it's red i disavow
00:45:50.800 i disavow trying to get back on youtube oh i mean my my shirt that i got i don't know what that is 0.90
00:46:02.720 i don't know what that is you told me to throw that trash away you know
00:46:09.120 yeah i said throw it out i said that's terrible you said use it as a rag why would you ever have
00:46:13.920 i'm just like that i'm just offended oh okay all right bye guan see you talk to you later
00:46:21.600 um thor oh we have thor in the chat hi thor he says a good girlfriend solves the desire issue
00:46:29.520 okay hello what is your name my name's kevin how's it going bro i'm i'm good how are you
00:46:36.880 welcome to the show uh where are you calling out of i'm calling out of fla south florida oh cool
00:46:43.860 what's the is it nice out there today yeah it's actually been uh been pretty good we've had a
00:46:50.480 little spit rings uh every now and then but it's been pretty good weather so far can't complain
00:46:54.600 so are you married or are you coming from a married point of view or a single point of view
00:47:00.080 or girlfriend what's your i would say single point of view um i've been divorced for probably
00:47:05.520 about, I would say, seven and a half years now. Okay. Which question do you want me to kind of
00:47:12.080 tackle first? So, well, the first question is, do you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to
00:47:17.600 last? Ah, wow. This is a tough question. I mean, coming from a man's point of view, I would say
00:47:27.980 yes. In the early stages, I would probably say, you know, from 18 to probably, I would say 40 to
00:47:38.020 45. Now, granted, you know, we do have new technology these days to help elderly men
00:47:45.500 still be able to perform, you know, sexually wise, whatnot. But I think when you get older,
00:47:50.520 there's a lot of things that you kind of look at inside your woman, with the exception that 0.99
00:47:54.940 just having sex with you. Do you want your woman to stay if she does not want to be there? 0.89
00:48:03.100 Most men will say no. I don't think anyone wants, if you're in any type of relationship,
00:48:10.400 whether it be professional, personal business, for them to stay knowing that their heart's not
00:48:17.060 in it, their action's not in it. It's a very tough thing to say because I know most men,
00:48:23.980 we hang in there no matter what because we we like to do things based off duty you know if you
00:48:29.620 put time in with us um over the past years blood sweat and tears you showed us you know you kind
00:48:36.320 of earned it right over time you know um but overall no and is there any other thoughts you
00:48:45.280 wanted to add on the conversation like from your personal experience or anything um you know i will
00:48:52.140 say this i think um this is actually different you know uh that i kind of see in the space in
00:48:58.420 regards to vulcan conversations and i think i think these things important i mean i've i've
00:49:04.100 been in rooms to where i've been propositioned with the husband being in the room when i say
00:49:08.900 room talking about events you know gatherings galas and whatnot and you know some of these
00:49:15.700 women they do have conversations previously with their husbands or others and there's some that
00:49:20.700 don't. And, um, but you don't hear about these conversations, um, between men and women live
00:49:27.960 like you're doing kind of now. And I think that's probably the next step. You know, if the society
00:49:32.460 continues to go the way it is, it's just interesting. Okay. Well, thank you very much
00:49:37.740 for calling in. No problem at all. Thank you. Have a good night. Okay. So we have a mix of
00:49:48.480 opinions guys we got um i think we get you have to exit off we don't know how to kick people off
00:49:56.040 yet we got i'm sorry i need you yeah sorry the go to the audacity network.com guys i know they're
00:50:03.320 figuring it out oh no i don't know okay well go to the audacity network.com guys to help us with
00:50:11.120 our tech issues please the you know i mean one day maybe we can afford zoom premium one day so
00:50:17.700 go to the audacity network.com get your monthly or yearly pass okay hello sir uh what is your name
00:50:25.620 hey i'm brooks my name's brooks brooks and where are you calling out of
00:50:30.980 i'm madison wisconsin oh okay nice um and what are your thoughts on the topic
00:50:39.540 do you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last yeah i mean
00:50:47.220 it kind of like i guess i needed to start
00:50:53.700 okay um but what some men get into marriages and then they don't know that initially that
00:51:01.700 the woman's not sexually attracted to them so if you find that out later do you think it can still
00:51:07.860 last or no depends how much she like works me out to like get in shape for her you know okay
00:51:19.940 like if i can it's usually it would be on my end that i'd be not you know i'm kind of
00:51:25.060 fed a little bit sometimes one of those broke musicians you were talking about earlier you
00:51:30.980 You know, and I'm kind of fad and lazy sometimes.
00:51:34.340 But if she got me in shape enough, she'd probably stay with me, thanks.
00:51:43.380 Okay. 1.00
00:51:44.920 And then, do you want a woman to stay when she does not want to be there? 0.98
00:51:50.320 No. 0.99
00:51:53.980 Probably not.
00:51:55.140 But it's, like, it depends who it is, though.
00:52:00.980 okay like do you mean it depends how attractive she is or
00:52:08.900 i mean if do you believe in like you believe in love at first sight
00:52:17.060 not really i do okay
00:52:24.180 so then it kind of changes things
00:52:25.940 um do you have any other personal um thoughts on the topic like from your own personal experience
00:52:34.320 oh no oh my god i had so many stories um i was with one woman for like five years that it was
00:52:40.640 like a live-in girlfriend she gave me a lot of trouble lots of uh trouble and so i've uh i've
00:52:46.900 written a song about her but it's i don't know anyway um that's the closest thing i have to like
00:52:53.820 marriage experience as it was really disastrous um i don't know it was just give me a specific
00:53:01.000 question yeah i just meant have you ever been with a woman that didn't have sexual desire or
00:53:06.500 maybe it went away or maybe you were the guy that she cheated with i don't uh i've really never um
00:53:14.920 been that well it's like once or twice i've been the guy the third the third wheeler or something
00:53:21.060 i keep on having to move because i keep having neighbor guys think that i'm getting with their
00:53:26.220 girlfriends it's not the case because i don't want the problem i've been locked up with a lot
00:53:30.560 of killers and stuff that killed for those reasons um so i don't really take guys girlfriends
00:53:36.760 i've done maybe once or twice but um what was the other part of the question um i just asked if you
00:53:44.560 had any personal stories about that have to do with sexual desire or women staying when they
00:53:50.200 don't want to be there oh yeah yeah so it's like when um there's been times where they're
00:53:57.400 they're not so much into me after a while or like they're not into me at the start and then like
00:54:03.500 they're usually it's like has to do with being around me more you know it's the issue they're
00:54:08.260 not they don't look at me and think i'm that great looking sometimes but you know not all
00:54:14.620 of us can be great guys some of us just play music pretty well and like it's it's a mystery
00:54:19.860 that how that's changed in my lifetime when i was in high school playing music uh same city i'm in
00:54:25.620 being a left-wing musician it was a lot different uh being more on the right side of politics in
00:54:31.780 this town madison's like a cult so it's kind of uh difficult to break through here uh to get any
00:54:40.420 kind of gigs and so i'm just be like outside today like today i'm outside i like in front
00:54:45.940 my apartment playing guitar and it's just like people stare at you um that's kind of
00:54:55.860 i guess that's what they do here they'll stare at you and then kind of not once you start talking
00:55:00.580 to them they'll figure like through through like uh virtue signaling language i use they'll figure
00:55:06.660 out that i'm a trump supporter or something like that that's over with that it's kind of like
00:55:12.260 i play country music uh ish kind of stuff and it doesn't it's not the right city so
00:55:22.420 well thank you so much for sharing i appreciate you calling in all right it's sunny out here
00:55:30.580 oh yeah um okay let me look at the chat really quick 0.97
00:55:34.020 um it says wait y'all marry non-virgins show me your virgin MGTOW I mean aren't you men going 0.64
00:55:42.980 their own way like isn't that really you're not either you know um they said go to Tennessee
00:55:52.120 guys keep the conversations classy yes I need to put that in my my rules I don't want you guys
00:56:00.500 insulting people's looks I want to have real conversations here so you guys usually just do
00:56:07.720 that to the women I mean let's just I don't know why but um if you guys do it it's usually not the
00:56:15.580 guys but either either or okay um from a female's point of view we want intimacy over sex okay so
00:56:26.800 let's go to the next caller maybe we'll take a couple more
00:56:39.120 okay I'll let them so guys if you call in a couple things okay so I love hearing people's
00:56:47.360 personal stories so if you have a personal story about I'm going to ask you the two questions
00:56:51.920 um I might ask for your information like where you're from relationship status whatever and then
00:56:58.480 um I'm gonna ask you guys the questions and if you have any personal stories to add
00:57:03.480 good stories I want to hear is um maybe you have experience in a sexless marriage maybe you have
00:57:11.100 experience being the guy that's being cheated with or maybe you have a happy marriage and you
00:57:15.900 needed that or you didn't need that in order to succeed I don't know but I want to I want to hear
00:57:20.540 um yeah so that's that's what we're gonna do um is his it's working now okay hello hello sir how
00:57:28.880 are you i'm all right how you doing i'm good where are you calling out of uh sunny old england
00:57:36.040 oh okay you're in england um what part of what part of england uh northeast oh okay and
00:57:43.600 yeah um are you single married um pretty much single at the minute like anyway but uh okay
00:57:53.360 yeah uh you're buzzing really bad is it buzzing is it oh oh now it's stopped it's stopped now 0.58
00:58:00.320 oh all right okay so do you think you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last
00:58:05.440 um i think it's buzzing again i don't know what it is oh now it's stopping it's going in and out
00:58:15.280 oh right i sorry i'll try not to swear um yeah uh i think it's some level yeah yeah but like
00:58:25.840 i think it has to be sort of like a long-term thing uh sort of based on respect uh sort of
00:58:33.360 like to last the journey you know what i mean uh i i don't think it's uh i mean like the whole
00:58:40.640 romance thing's great i suppose like for a few years you know but um it sort of dies at the end
00:58:47.360 of the day you know and like without like real respect i don't think it's gonna last you know
00:58:54.080 um the title of your sort of video today can i just comment on that yeah go ahead cool um why 0.78
00:59:02.560 women's i don't think that someone's give up their type i think they need to give up their ideals
00:59:07.600 their ideal you know like the sort of multimedia driven ideal you know um of modern age yeah like
00:59:16.320 this the six foot the six pack the six figures you know like they need to be realistic and sort
00:59:22.880 of humble i guess anyway um i'll i'll leave it there if you like um just last question do you
00:59:30.560 you want a woman to stay who doesn't want to be there no way man no no that would kill you wouldn't
00:59:36.320 it yeah yeah that would kill you same same with the other way like i mean a bloke who uh stays
00:59:44.180 with a woman and she knows that he doesn't really like her that much you know what i mean doesn't
00:59:49.500 fancy her it doesn't sort of pull to her you know so yeah same same same okay well thank you very
00:59:57.060 much for calling in yours okay guys um go to the audacity network.com um i meant to tell you guys
01:00:07.740 in the chat um i i haven't been doing the after show because i just haven't thought of a really
01:00:16.240 i was trying to think of something i could give you guys after like extra content behind a paywall
01:00:22.420 or like um extra show after and just creatively i haven't been able to think of anything
01:00:28.500 and i'm gonna i'm gonna come up with some ideas but if you guys have something you'd
01:00:32.660 like to see like after the show just let me know and um you know we can look at them see
01:00:37.620 if it makes sense um hello we have a woman calling in hello oh hi you've called in before right
01:00:43.620 Yeah, I think. Yes. Hi, Pearl. How are you? I'm doing good. Doing good. So remind me of your 0.93
01:00:52.100 name one more time. Mrs. Ziegler. Mrs. Ziegler. Okay. Nice to meet you. Where are you calling
01:00:57.840 out of? St. Louis, Missouri. Okay, nice. So what are your thoughts? You're married, right? Mrs.
01:01:05.260 Right? You're married. I am. Okay. So do you think you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to
01:01:11.500 last absolutely and the reason why i say that is because i was going through chemo with pancreatic
01:01:22.200 cancer and that did not stop me from wanting to continue and want to have that closeness with my
01:01:30.940 husband even during such that not feeling well which i really did not feel well at all during
01:01:37.740 all of that um but i have been married previously and um there's a major difference in the sort of
01:01:48.860 desire that i have between these two different types of men i did meet my first husband while
01:01:53.420 i was on birth control and it's not just that i don't find my ex-husband attractive because he's
01:01:57.980 my ex-husband but if i were to like look at actors per se that have a similar appearance
01:02:04.860 slender figure tall you know like as my first husband i no longer find them attractive
01:02:12.780 like not like i used to like i wouldn't go like you know did you did that change when
01:02:18.140 you got off of birth control absolutely because the reason one thing about my husband
01:02:24.300 uh he has no henry cavill but to me he is and it has to do with a little bit of his natural scent
01:02:30.620 that just oh my gosh it strikes me one yeah i know when i got when a guy smells a certain yeah i know
01:02:36.460 i just i mean yeah i can't help it you know and i'm not to disparage my husband or anything but
01:02:41.820 he's he's balder you know and he's you know a bit of a dab but he's also very very muscular so he's 0.94
01:02:48.540 like a lumberjack you know kind of built so he's like not conventionally like all the ladies would
01:02:53.340 probably be like oh yeah of course you're attracted to him he's a hot stud no i'm just genuinely like
01:02:59.980 on like this almost primal level attracted to him that even with going through all of that um
01:03:06.380 we still maintained them you know about three to four times a week on average you know so
01:03:13.980 i think that's a little bit better than i think some of the numbers you've presented yeah and was
01:03:21.020 what what was that like being in a marriage with someone you weren't attracted to
01:03:24.780 like what was that like for you there there was no loyalty there was no we're gonna work through
01:03:33.080 this um and that's part of what what made it fall apart was because we were going through a
01:03:38.800 miscarriage and homelessness and another um followed by another unplanned pregnancy well
01:03:43.560 by unplanned it was like you know we were homeless we weren't wanting to bring a child just yet into
01:03:47.720 the world and he just wasn't in this we're in it for the thick and thin it was just
01:03:54.780 you know what this is just too hard for me there's the door by see you later
01:03:58.120 and I was just completely devastated and I couldn't figure that out but when I met my husband
01:04:05.400 it was just there it was just this sort of like we're in it together forever you know no matter
01:04:12.300 if that forever isn't going to be for very long given my health um but I think that having that
01:04:18.400 but mind you um when I was first diagnosed they give you like this welcome packet or something
01:04:24.300 and they give you a pamphlet to warn you of basically the imminent divorce you're going to
01:04:31.820 go through. And that is because men often leave and women or whatever. And so before I had a
01:04:39.400 chance to go through this packet, my husband just threw it away because he was like, I'm just not
01:04:42.240 going to have that in the back of my mind while going through that. So that was something that
01:04:46.900 was very, very powerful. So they give you a packet basically telling you you're going to
01:04:50.920 get divorced wow yes yes and the other cancer patients is that what happened like i'm assuming
01:04:58.160 you probably have met people through this i don't know support groups or whatever going to chemo
01:05:03.640 and has that been your experience talking to them that they end up getting divorced
01:05:07.740 no because with pancreatic cancer almost everyone dies oh okay so i i was um
01:05:14.560 um play i was planning my funeral by the way so i did beat it um miraculously but i think that
01:05:24.780 just having that firmness with my family knowing that my husband's like we're
01:05:30.880 no matter how long it is even if it's very short for right now it's going to be
01:05:35.760 the best and i couldn't help but want to not be too tired to be intimate with him because he he was
01:05:45.340 being this rock solid man you know he was working two jobs we have four kids like
01:05:51.800 he was just taking on all this and all i was doing was what lying in bed you know doped up
01:05:58.140 on medications i mean it wasn't what excuse did i really have you know wow wow so you beat cancer
01:06:06.460 congratulations that's amazing thank you so is it and actually oh i just have to say i have to thank
01:06:12.700 you for that because it was during chemo that i stumbled upon your show and it was uh i believe
01:06:19.820 auntie jenny who said it was the woman's job to make herself available for her husband and that
01:06:25.100 got me thinking i was like well a little bit before this because of this you know intense
01:06:29.820 desire that i have for my husband i was just so tired with work and school and all this and
01:06:33.820 it was just oh you know tired it's so late you know it took forever to get the kids in bed
01:06:38.460 and i was like why was i making these excuses i am so turned on by my husband
01:06:43.980 auntie jenny's right and i'm like you know what screw this chemo thing let me talk with my doctor
01:06:49.340 to work around my chemo schedule so the toxicity wasn't a concern
01:06:52.460 and then just was like you know what and so this was a very like powerful moment for me because
01:06:57.540 then i was like you know what i'm just what what do i have left i mean i could lose my life very
01:07:02.680 very soon and this poor man what was the last time he's ever been with his minutes with his wife
01:07:07.560 and then to go through all of this and i was like come on i i could pull myself together
01:07:12.360 to do this for my husband and it just became the most intense experience because that was when i
01:07:17.200 truly was able to open myself up to him and just really enjoy this intimate experience where it's
01:07:22.200 just like the i don't want to make excuses anymore it's just like it's part of a routine schedule
01:07:28.940 now you know just to always check in at the very least because he's also quite tired himself you
01:07:35.340 know just to see and even if we're just cuddling or just other forms of intimacy just to really
01:07:42.120 let each other know that we are here for one another did you see the episode where she said
01:07:47.500 you got a big mouth fillet that was so funny did you see that one yeah that's so funny
01:07:53.060 i think auntie jenny like my hero yeah so yeah maybe one day we can do a call with both of you
01:07:59.840 i can text her baby that'd be kind of fun that would be amazing because like i said like that
01:08:04.360 was like a huge turning point for me because here i am thinking like oh yes i'm definitely
01:08:08.620 a traditional woman and then you're like you need to be a virgin on your wedding night and i'm like
01:08:12.820 no i know okay well let me try to be better and so that was one of the first things i started off
01:08:22.380 with was just you know well that's great i'm happy for you you even look um like better since the
01:08:28.440 last time i've seen you like your your face looks like there's more like um life yeah yes because
01:08:35.220 i i'm done with all the chemo done with all the radiation um all the other alternative treatments
01:08:39.680 and all that so well congratulations that's amazing I'm happy for you that's
01:08:45.180 awesome the second question is would you want a man to stay who doesn't want to
01:08:49.820 be there no yeah I wouldn't either because if I stayed with I mean if for
01:09:03.920 some reason like he didn't actually kick me to the curb and lock the door yeah I
01:09:09.680 And, um, then, then I don't, I would have never been able to experience what I'm experiencing
01:09:16.020 now, but it is possible.
01:09:18.560 But yeah.
01:09:19.400 Well, thank you so much for sharing.
01:09:21.400 Um, this is great.
01:09:22.560 So have a, have a good day.
01:09:24.020 Thanks for sharing.
01:09:25.220 You too.
01:09:25.920 Call in any time.
01:09:27.760 Will do.
01:09:28.320 Okay.
01:09:30.480 Um, nevermarrieddating.com.
01:09:36.540 What is that? 1.00
01:09:37.380 um okay guys so yeah she's called in she actually looks great since the last time I've seen her
01:09:44.580 calling like six months ago or something when I was back in London I remember her um so the first
01:09:52.820 thing I'm going to ask you guys is um just basics about you the more personal stories you guys can
01:09:58.940 share the better that's really what I want to hear is um yeah your personal stories and
01:10:07.240 yeah just things that have affected your life when it comes to sexual desire
01:10:15.160 and if you want someone to stay that doesn't want to be there
01:10:19.600 and I guess the question also would be how long does she not want to be there or he is it a month
01:10:29.100 two months a year
01:10:30.760 I think I could do a month a month wouldn't be so bad
01:10:37.240 But let me look at the great caller.
01:10:46.280 Donovan.
01:10:47.760 Don't trash Donovan. 1.00
01:10:49.800 Get out of here. 1.00
01:10:52.280 Smart auntie. 0.65
01:10:53.320 Yeah, I got to text auntie and tell her to call in one of these days.
01:10:56.720 You can do both of them.
01:11:00.640 Do we have any other callers or no?
01:11:03.600 Oh, we do?
01:11:05.100 I just don't.
01:11:05.800 His camera's off.
01:11:07.240 yeah guys you can't there's too many weird people on the internet I can't do no cameras
01:11:16.540 maybe someday I'll do a caller show but we got to figure out how to filter it
01:11:21.280 have an open door policy this girl says I've been celibate for years I don't know
01:11:31.660 guys i i just don't know if that's something like we should brag about like i don't know i don't know 0.99
01:11:39.280 if that's i mean you can but i always see women do this like they lead with that and i just i
01:11:45.860 don't know if it's like the selling point we want it to be i don't know um hello sir what's your name
01:11:53.640 hi hello what is your name um uh easton first name easton and where are you calling out of
01:12:03.920 uh san antonio texas okay texas and um are you single or married or in a relationship
01:12:12.560 uh in a relationship but i used to be married okay and um so the question today is do you
01:12:20.120 needs sexual desire in order for a marriage to last? Yes. Yeah, I think it's not just
01:12:29.640 necessary. I think it's detrimental in some ways. I think that the amount of sexual chemistry a man
01:12:40.180 has for his wife kind of gauges where the relationship is, whether he's in the mood,
01:12:45.900 whether she's not in the mood, or whether or not he's still attracted to her or still wants her.
01:12:52.340 And how does that line up with your personal experience?
01:12:56.940 So I used to be married when I was 23. And back then, my wife, then my fiance that then became my
01:13:08.860 wife um she was a bigger girl but um over the years she put on more weight but um i wanted to 0.99
01:13:15.900 try and do something about it um you know go to the gym you know uh go with her be encouraging 0.99
01:13:22.760 this and that but um i over over time i started losing like sexual attraction uh for her so you
01:13:30.200 know she's um you know becoming more emotionally distraught and then uh from then on in i started
01:13:36.020 you know um stepping outside the marriage cheating things like that so it it's really um
01:13:43.300 it's it's really a cause for how relationships can break down like if you lose sexual attraction
01:13:49.700 um then you'll find us men like more than likely stepping out the door
01:13:53.860 and do you think that had she stayed in shape you you would have still stepped out
01:13:58.500 that's hard to say um i would like to say no or i would like to say if we're doing this thing
01:14:07.920 together then the question is you know when do i have time to step out if i'm doing this thing
01:14:14.140 with my wife and we're both getting in shape i'm getting bigger she's getting smaller and we're
01:14:19.400 both improving on ourselves then it's like well then why am i stepping out that's extra work on
01:14:24.920 top of the work that i'm doing so we're doing things together and that would have maybe i would
01:14:30.280 have said you know um i would say you know made things probably probably last a little bit longer
01:14:37.000 in the marriage and um who ended it did you end up ending it or did she no she ended the marriage um
01:14:46.680 we were trying to get back um we were trying to get into uh marriage counseling and we did uh
01:14:53.720 um, some sessions, but, um, uh, in the middle of all that, I guess, uh, she decided to pick up and
01:15:01.040 leave. Yeah. And do you want a woman to stay who doesn't want to be there? No, no, no, not at all.
01:15:10.340 Um, there's, there's no more, um, awful of a feeling than feeling like you're a prison guard
01:15:17.440 or somebody's kind of, uh, you know, captor, you know, not letting them leave, not letting them
01:15:22.380 live their lives or um if you can't fulfill someone's you know uh requirements as far as
01:15:29.980 uh either chemistry or um being a couple or or being the man that you want you want they want
01:15:36.780 you to be or vice versa then it's best to end it but i i think the issue is as time goes on we kind
01:15:44.780 of both lie to ourselves and just you know day after day after day goes on the marriage may have
01:15:50.940 ended two three years ago it's the lie that continues how many years do you think you were
01:15:58.380 married and it was a lie before you ended it uh two years we were married for 10 years but um
01:16:06.940 two years we were a happy couple um you know i'm a new husband she's a new wife uh we're um trying
01:16:14.460 to work things out um we're focusing on ourselves and you know our daughter things like that so
01:16:20.940 two good solid years of, you know, 100% attention, right, on each other in the marriage and the
01:16:26.000 nuclear family. But like I said, I think after that, you know, three, four, five years, you know,
01:16:33.240 you get comfortable, you settle, things start to change, maybe the sexual attraction isn't there
01:16:39.740 as much. So you're not having it as much and you're stepping outside and, you know, you're
01:16:45.400 having arguments um she picks up sleeves frosted forest papers that's what you hear and then um
01:16:52.180 just the same kind of the same story over and over again seems to be repeating itself in
01:16:56.620 in different relationships or at different stages of somebody's life and i'm just curious um did
01:17:02.260 she end up like remarrying and like losing did she lose weight after or no no she gained even
01:17:09.780 more weight with the new husband because he was bigger okay that's probably a good solution for 1.00
01:17:15.220 her then no she likes to eat you gotta go find a guy that likes to eat too all right right but
01:17:21.920 i'm glad but but what was important to me at the time was you know i was distraught because i lost
01:17:27.360 you know connection with my daughter and and things like that you know that's what upset me
01:17:31.200 what made me happy though was that she found happiness within someone else at the very least
01:17:36.660 um if i couldn't make her you know um happy well not that i ever could but if i couldn't be the
01:17:43.460 man or the husband that i'm supposed to be to her then you know i can't hate her or have any
01:17:51.140 negative feelings because she found that in somebody else i guess i just can't yeah okay
01:17:56.340 well thank you very much for calling in this was a good call so thank you no thanks no problem
01:18:01.620 okay guys um and see this is the it's kind of funny how logical men are when he's saying
01:18:14.020 I ask would you have cheated if um had she not gained the weight and his response is um
01:18:25.620 well that just seems like too much work guys are funny guys are funny um okay do we have more
01:18:33.920 callers yeah okay okay so next caller
01:18:37.720 they don't have sex they just eat well I mean that's a solution for some people I've seen the 1.00
01:18:53.180 feeders I've seen the feeders stuff you know the even though like the super big women they still 0.74
01:19:00.640 get boyfriends I mean someone there's always a guy that'll do it you know what I mean there's 0.74
01:19:08.680 always one I mean there's men that pay thousands of dollars to women they're not even sleeping with
01:19:17.020 you would be surprised at the level of simping guys there it never ends it it astounds me actually
01:19:24.960 you think no no guy would sign up for that deal yes yes they would there's always one always
01:19:34.460 um do we have the next caller coming or no
01:19:47.020 um let me read the chat guys help a girl out help sorry help help a young help up
01:19:59.500 help a woman out okay please please please go to the audacitynetwork.com get get a monthly
01:20:06.420 membership we're demonetized you know that's that's the best way you can support i'm running
01:20:12.140 a marathon this weekend and i still i'm coming in day in day out streaming getting your insights
01:20:19.260 so go go to the website please okay oh we have our next caller um hello sir what is your name
01:20:27.500 sean hi sean where are you calling out of thailand oh you're in thailand i thought the american flag
01:20:35.340 made me think america but no thailand yeah yeah no i'm an american but i'm over here retired
01:20:41.020 living in thailand oh wow how is that amazing oh really it's good yeah yeah just relaxing
01:20:50.220 live about a one minute walk from the beach and it's perfect wow so are you single or are you
01:20:55.980 married single free agent coach greg adams okay so do you think you need um actually before i ask
01:21:07.180 have you been married before or have you always been single always been single okay so just from
01:21:13.740 your observations then do you think you need sexual desire in order for a marriage to last
01:21:20.860 in my opinion yes and last and with the intent to keep it going and happy marriage you know how
01:21:28.540 people say that then yes that's one of the elements but technically speaking though you
01:21:35.900 know people will stay in marriages regardless i like the the air quotes i'm like oh i know you
01:21:42.860 watch cga i like this show too though um do you want a woman to stay when she does not want to be
01:21:50.860 there not for me because i'm kind of big on i don't want to be around people who don't want to
01:21:57.340 be around me or don't want to be with me so it's pretty much a simple principle and so i wouldn't
01:22:04.700 prefer something like that if you want something else then go and do you have any personal
01:22:11.900 experiences that you think are relevant to the topic pertaining to specifically uh did you watch
01:22:23.340 the show earlier or no no no i caught a little bit yeah i tried to catch a little bit yeah so
01:22:28.860 so um we had oh we just we had um two examples of marriages and one was from a christian woman who
01:22:38.140 said she wasn't initially attracted to her husband but she just does it anyway right and then we have
01:22:46.220 another one where they've been married for 40 years and they said sex is what keeps the marriage
01:22:50.580 together um so we had two examples so um and we talked about genuine desire a little bit
01:22:58.580 and when women it's when women do things because they want to not because they have to
01:23:03.700 um so i just what if you have any stories that you think are relevant um go ahead i think another
01:23:12.100 thing i read a book why women or why people but it said why women have sex and it was specifically
01:23:18.580 talking about, especially from my experience, I've been overseas for about 20 years, deployed with
01:23:24.360 the military. I was a diplomat for a couple of years and et cetera. And a lot of women did have
01:23:29.900 experiences at least of desire or curiosity, you know, never being with an American or Black
01:23:37.280 American specifically. So when I spent my time overseas, I had a lot of women who might have not
01:23:43.080 wanting to marry me right or you know take me home to the parents but just curious also and so a lot
01:23:49.940 of people don't mostly think that women do these type of things where it's just like hey i'm going
01:23:56.120 to be with this guy just for this specific purpose because i'm curious and then just give that a try
01:24:02.900 so i appreciate your show because you just highlight a lot of things that people don't
01:24:06.940 quite to think through at all or do research. Yeah. Well, thank you for sharing and thank you
01:24:13.860 for calling in. Yeah, no problem. And thanks for everything you do. I really do appreciate it. I
01:24:19.480 think that you're a good voice and you do a lot of research and you dive deep into the issues and
01:24:25.300 most people just stay on the surface. So shout outs to you. Keep doing what you're doing all day
01:24:30.220 every day. We support you. Thank you so much. All right. See you. Peace.
01:24:36.940 okay wow so they I've heard that a lot you know that was one of the most common um surprises I
01:24:44.380 had was the complaint from men that women wanted to sleep with them but they didn't want to date
01:24:51.420 them and that that was their experience in dating was they would just have women that wanted them 1.00
01:24:57.120 for sex only and they wouldn't want relationships because our whole media says that women are the 0.99
01:25:05.320 ones that want relationships. But when you look at things at a macro level and you think who has
01:25:12.580 the choice for relationships, men or women? Who downloads a dating app and gets 5,000 matches?
01:25:19.620 Men or women? Women. Who are the ones that get proposed to? Men or women? Women. And
01:25:30.620 women have far more choice than men and marriage is breaking down the more choice that we're given
01:25:40.380 so that tells us that as a group women don't want relationships or marriage but I think the way that 0.79
01:25:47.640 women fool men is by saying we do but if we did you wouldn't see three out of four women being
01:25:58.760 overweight um you would see more action on the women's part right um you would see us becoming
01:26:09.500 more likable more feminine but that's not what we're seeing we're going the opposite direction
01:26:13.620 so but the thing is the media is very um female centric and it just
01:26:20.580 and I think it's because then we can get more resources from men or something because
01:26:28.820 I when you look at it at a macro scale and not an individualistic scale there might be the 0.98
01:26:34.560 exception that you know or whatever it's sort of all of the data indicates that women don't
01:26:42.500 want to be mothers and don't want to be in relationships based on their choices so you
01:26:48.040 know when one out of three women's had an abortion what does that tell us we want motherhood or we 0.76
01:26:53.180 don't want motherhood so okay two cents they said the brother has Asian fever you guys are funny 0.99
01:27:07.380 who has everything served to them on a silver platter well most women want money from men 0.61
01:27:16.680 i don't even think it's money alone but i think the world caters to women um in terms of job
01:27:25.040 opportunities um getting into places um attention from men and
01:27:34.420 you know if men at 20 were given a ton of attention from women where they get 5 000
01:27:42.160 matches of women on a dating app do you think most men would be dying to settle down that's
01:27:48.320 why the internet changed dating forever you'll never go back after that ever because every
01:27:56.880 woman downloads an app and gets a million matches um do we have any other callers no okay okay well
01:28:08.400 I think that's good for today um all right guys thank you thank you for watching again on this
01:28:17.580 channel I strive to be as accurate as possible and I I strive to leave morality at the door I
01:28:24.320 know that's not always what I've done but um the further I go into YouTube and this you know
01:28:34.600 reporting on what's going on i try to be as accurate as possible not idealistic i think
01:28:41.380 idealism is great and it's amazing to talk about what could be right but i try to be as accurate
01:28:50.300 as possible if you want to support my work please go to the audacity network.com and wish me luck
01:28:56.460 i'm running a marathon this weekend it's going to be rough um tomorrow we're going to go live at
01:29:01.860 five and we're we're still debating the times um we may go back to three again I don't know
01:29:11.380 but if you guys have a preference please let me know in the comments I value all of your feedback
01:29:15.900 a ton and like the video on your way out subscribe to the channel and I'll talk to you next time
01:29:31.860 You