Playing to Win - September 17, 2025


PTW_105_F*uk Boy Exposes The Truth About Woman


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 51 minutes

Words per minute

204.03424

Word count

22,668

Sentence count

1,583

Harmful content

Misogyny

147

sentences flagged

Toxicity

110

sentences flagged

Hate speech

106

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of Playing To Win, I sit down with my good friend Jay to talk about his journey from a Muslim-American immigrant in Malaysia to becoming a US citizen. Jay talks about how he made it across the US border and how he became a citizen.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 For the last 200,000 years, groups of men have banded together as a means of survival and for
00:00:07.860 the purpose of moving civilization forward. Men built great cities, advanced modern technology,
00:00:14.480 and created economic systems that still prevail today. Unfortunately, those advancements in
00:00:20.120 economic stability have created widespread levels of comfort that even the most wealthy kings in
00:00:25.400 history didn't enjoy. With no great purpose or mission, most men today have accepted this comfort
00:00:31.360 and in turn have become soft, weak, feminized versions of their past ancestors. These men are
00:00:37.800 content for spending their days at jobs they dislike, spending time with people they can hardly
00:00:42.440 tolerate, and the most fulfilling thing in their lives is watching their favorite sports teams
00:00:46.800 are getting lost in their favorite video game. The men of the Unplugged Brotherhood demand more
00:00:53.440 from themselves, and more importantly, from each other. Through mentally and physically challenging
00:00:58.340 in-person retreats and events, these men have discovered that growth only happens when you
00:01:03.440 are willing to show up, force yourself out of your comfort zone, and above all, do the work.
00:01:09.960 Don't waste another day squandering your potential to be the man you were meant to be.
00:01:15.300 Reject comfort, let go of people that are holding you back, and seize the opportunity to join a true
00:01:20.860 brotherhood that will challenge you to become the best version of yourself.
00:01:42.220 All right, gentlemen, what's going on? Welcome to Playing to Win episode 105. I've got an excellent
00:01:49.260 guest today that I think you're going to love. You probably never heard of him unless you're on
00:01:52.260 Twitter, and you follow me over there and see who I retweet or endorse from time to time, but
00:01:57.200 I came across this character, Jay, here. I don't know who introduced me to you. I really can't
00:02:05.240 remember. I don't know, maybe you do, but I came across your stuff. You kind of ran from some trouble
00:02:11.280 in Asia. I want you to tell that story, because that was like some social media posts that forced
00:02:15.200 you to leave, and then you kind of had to get into America, become a citizen, sort of stuff like
00:02:19.480 that. You went through the Darien Gap or something? I saw your post at one point.
00:02:23.580 Oh, not that dramatic. Basically, about 10 years ago, I was a quote-unquote influencer back in my
00:02:30.000 home country. I posted some stuff about religion, and I came from a Muslim country, Malaysia. I got into
00:02:38.460 a lot of trouble back then. They put me in jail and stuff. They want to put me in jail for many years,
00:02:42.460 so I decided, you know what? Fuck that. I want to live that life, and so I flew all the way to 1.00
00:02:48.860 Mexico and then went all the way to... Who was the post that you made that offended them so badly that
00:02:52.500 was going to put you in jail? It was just some religious stuff, you know? It was... If you really
00:02:58.980 wanted to know the specifics, it was the Muslim month of fasting, and I was sort of ridiculing the 0.98
00:03:04.960 whole fasting thing. Got it. And then they didn't like that. Okay. So basically, they were trying to put me
00:03:11.800 in jail for many years, so I just decided, you know what? Fuck this. I'm going to run to America, 1.00
00:03:15.720 and I'm going to seek for asylum on the border with California. And yeah, apparently, they took
00:03:24.080 me in, and that's been... You walked across the border? Yeah. I walked to the border, and I sort of
00:03:30.600 begged for asylum. My government is sort of picking on me. Can you help me out? But those were very
00:03:38.640 different days, because those were the Obama years. Yeah. So, you know, border guard's a lot
00:03:43.320 more friendlier back then. Okay. Right now, not so much. And you got your citizenship shortly after
00:03:48.420 that, right? I got my citizenship earlier this year. Okay. And you worked in... I'm going to use the
00:03:55.060 word corn. I mean, you obviously know what I'm talking about, but you know, we talked before we
00:03:57.840 went live to sort of water down this for the YouTube algorithms a little bit, but you were involved in
00:04:01.660 corn for a little bit. What was that part of your career like? You know, because I want to sort of
00:04:06.580 like build up to this stuff that you're doing right now, because you're like a non-monogamous
00:04:10.240 like dating sort of F-boy today. So basically, when I first came to LA, I did whatever jobs I can. And
00:04:19.280 one of the jobs that I did over and over again was to be an extra in the film productions,
00:04:24.800 regular film productions. So they paid about 100, 150 odd per day just to show up and be an extra,
00:04:32.380 you know, but it takes like 10, 12 hours a day. I did that for a while. You know, I did whatever I
00:04:37.080 could survive back then. And then suddenly someone told me that, you know what? Why don't you talk to
00:04:44.480 this person? Maybe, you know, you can do something that pays a little more. And it turns out it's
00:04:49.040 corn. And they told me to send some photos. I did. And I did my first scene in 2015. That's quite a
00:04:59.000 walk back. But I didn't really pursue it fully until like, I would say 2019, 2020. That's when I
00:05:05.700 start filming pretty often. Yeah. And you're an entrepreneur. Sorry, you're an entrepreneur now you
00:05:11.340 run, was it an e-commerce business or some kind of online business? Yes. In fact, the URL is right
00:05:15.740 there. I mean, that's my platform. So. All right. Well, you're kind of famous on Twitter. Like
00:05:22.000 this guy, Andrew here, obviously knows you. He's his best Twitter account in the game.
00:05:25.800 I mean, you're kind of famous on the X platform for, I think the thing that, that, that caught
00:05:32.320 my attention at first was that you basically stated that you don't date, like you don't
00:05:36.140 do dates anymore. It's, it's either come over to my place on the first meeting or I'm not
00:05:41.420 wasting my time. If I may, I'm just going to show the screen caps because you got the receipts
00:05:47.680 up over there. Let me just hang on a second. My studio is not working properly here. There
00:05:53.180 we go. Um, kind of walk me through what I'll, what I'll happen here. Cause I mean, this is
00:05:58.560 what really gets most people's attention. So I'll just read this out and then maybe, you
00:06:03.100 know, you can add a little bit of commentary insight to it, but it says Addy, uh, then
00:06:06.880 Abrax is black T something or that it says, Hey Addy. Um, I guess this is Jay here. So where
00:06:12.780 do you live? Uh, down to meet up tonight. She says, I'm in Gardenia. Where are you located?
00:06:17.940 You go on to say, all right, I'm downtown LA. Uh, don't think we're that far apart. You
00:06:22.500 should come by to my place and have some drinks and watch a movie together. Chit chat, get
00:06:26.160 to know one another, cuddle, et cetera. How 7 PM tonight sound very non-threatening, obviously
00:06:30.940 like a very suave sort of way to open it up. She goes, Nope. 20 ish minutes. Sounds good.
00:06:36.060 So no protest for your offer to come over. This is a first date obviously, right? Yes. Never
00:06:40.780 met her. Yeah. And then, and then you continue on. All right. Do you need a ride or do you drive?
00:06:45.080 So you're taking care of the, um, you know, facilitating her getting to your place, you
00:06:49.680 know, you're there offering to pick her up or send an Uber or something. She goes, I
00:06:53.140 drive. Okay, cool. I'm sure, uh, we'll enjoy our time together. And then you go on to say,
00:06:59.080 yeah, I'm a lifeguard. Sounds good. You too. Uh, oh, this is somebody else. Okay. So this
00:07:03.280 is another somebody else. So, Hey Danielle, uh, you feel good to meet up after rehearsal tonight.
00:07:09.460 Uh, you should come by my place, have some drinks, watch a movie together, chit chat, cuddle,
00:07:13.360 et cetera, exact same line. It's almost like a copy paste strategy that you're using.
00:07:16.940 Yeah. Or if you're more comfortable with me going over to yours, I can do that too. Let
00:07:20.700 me know. Uh, Hey, yeah, I'd love to, your place is good. Just send me an address. I'll
00:07:25.540 come over straight after rehearsal. Cool. Look forward to that. Um, the bottom part of that's
00:07:30.420 redacted. I'm assuming that's your address or something like that. It is. Um, I live alone
00:07:34.980 in a one bedroom apartment. Let me know, uh, when you're leaving so I can plan my time better.
00:07:39.440 See you tonight, Danielle. Uh, I got another chick here, Dana, uh, where to use one of 1.00
00:07:47.480 those chicks, eh? Uh, not too far downtown LA. I was heading out, uh, to get, to get good.
00:07:53.140 So I'm not really set on going to SM. What's SM? Uh, is that a part of no idea? Santa Monica,
00:08:00.340 Santa Monica. Okay. Uh, so not really set. I'm going to Santa Monica tonight. Uh, you should
00:08:04.720 drop by my place for some drinks, watch a movie together, chit chat, kick back, cuddle,
00:08:07.820 et cetera. How's APM exact same line. Good. See you at eight. No protesting from her whatsoever.
00:08:13.020 Do you drive or should I get you an Uber? I'll Uber. Okay. My address. Right. We got another
00:08:17.680 one here. Yvette. Hey, Yvette Alvin here. So Alvin's your pen name. That's, that's my other
00:08:23.900 name. Oh shit. I didn't, I didn't blur that out. Holy shit. Okay. Nevermind. Um, so, so where 1.00
00:08:29.680 do you live? Uh, down to meet up tonight. Hey there, tonight's a little short notice for
00:08:33.760 me, but tomorrow night I'm free. I live in Sherman Oaks. Well, cool. I live in downtown LA.
00:08:38.720 You should come over, have some drinks, watch a movie together, chit chat, cuddle, et cetera.
00:08:42.480 How's 7 PM sound? Yeah, that sounds great. Send me your address. Drops the address. I'll text you
00:08:46.840 tomorrow the day, blah, blah, blah. So like very clearly obvious now, how, how successful has this
00:08:53.140 strategy been for you when it comes to getting chicks to come over on the first date? Cause you 0.82
00:08:57.180 don't do dates anymore. Um, very successful, but there's a caveat. So these numbers, I don't simply
00:09:05.020 take numbers, you know, guys, uh, try to maximize the, uh, the number of numbers they have, but to me,
00:09:12.120 not all numbers are created equal. So unless a girl is high interest in me and a girl has indicated that
00:09:19.000 she would like to spend some time with me, um, I wouldn't take her number. So because I only want
00:09:25.480 high quality numbers in my pipeline, I don't want low quality numbers clogging up my, my, my text,
00:09:31.200 my, my texting app. Um, which is why they're all genuine burning desire. And I think I've seen you
00:09:36.560 as well too. Right. Genuine burning desire. There you go. Um, but obviously if you haven't even met
00:09:43.380 these girls, then I mean, um, they're really still trying to fill you out, but even then you can still
00:09:48.940 tell if they have high interest or low interest in you, right? They have low interest in me. I try not to
00:09:53.920 take the number because to me, I'm not about maximizing numbers. I'm about maximizing lays.
00:09:59.620 So what are strong indicator of interest versus the indifferent checks? Like what's the difference
00:10:05.800 between those two? If you can spell it out for viewers. Well, you can kind of tell if, uh, first
00:10:11.000 of all, it's responsiveness. Like if you, first of all, I got all these numbers from the apps,
00:10:15.000 right. Specifically Tinder. Um, how, how, how quickly they respond to you. Um, how much,
00:10:23.040 uh, how many words they use when they text you, um, uh, whether they open or you open that matters.
00:10:31.340 Um, and most importantly, I think if your profile is crafted in a certain way, it tells a certain
00:10:39.660 story and they still swipe, right. Then they're a high quality lead. If you catch my drift, because
00:10:47.560 a lot of guys profiles, it's, they put whatever photos they have in their phones, they write
00:10:53.140 whatever garbage comes to mind in, in their profile. So a lot of these leads are just unqualified.
00:11:00.780 My profile is very deliberate. Like it is crafted in a very specific way. Every single photo is a,
00:11:07.420 is, is a thirst quote unquote thirst trap. My profile is full of like innuendo. So a lot of girls 0.99
00:11:15.260 will be scared off and swipe left and that's fine. But the 20 or 30% or however many percent,
00:11:21.580 it might be 5%. I don't know. The other girls will swipe right. I know that there's a good chance 1.00
00:11:26.940 that they want to do something physical with me. What's the, um, what's the bio say? Like,
00:11:33.020 what does the profile bio say? My bio I have, I have something that is, it's like a very short
00:11:39.580 paragraph, but it's, it reads, it reads off like literatica. So it's like, you know, I'm going to
00:11:45.660 caress you. I'm going to hold your back and something. And then you tremble, you'll have like 0.99
00:11:50.300 tingling sensation down your toes. I had a whole paragraph. Yeah. Yeah. Like Christian Grey sort of
00:11:55.900 stuff, but, uh, you know, it passes the Tinder algorithm and it doesn't get, you gotta craft it
00:12:02.540 in a more, um, I don't want to say family friendly, but you know, well, acceptable way.
00:12:08.860 Yeah. You dropped the hint, but you make it clear that you're not looking for marriage. You're
00:12:12.620 obviously looking for money. Got it. Absolutely. And the vast majority of chicks will probably swipe 1.00
00:12:17.420 left on you and that's fine as long as not all of them swipe left. Okay. So, um,
00:12:23.420 um, at what point did you decide to abandon the like conventional let's go out for a coffee and
00:12:29.740 meet? Like, can you tell us the story behind that? Cause it's, cause it's very unusual for
00:12:33.820 guys nowadays to use a strategy and have success with it. Like to just get right to the point of
00:12:39.420 I'm here for intimacy and that's it. Right. So, so I'm slightly older. I'm like, I'm 36. Right. So
00:12:47.260 I started using dating apps in my mid twenties back then. And, and back then I was doing the whole
00:12:52.620 traditional dating thing. Um, and I, I did it to pretty good success. Like, which means that I took
00:12:58.460 the girls out. I even took them out to dinner. That's fine. There was this, um, there was this
00:13:02.540 English pub place that was like five minutes from my place. So I took them out there and, um,
00:13:08.460 and, and it was okay. And I would say maybe 60, 70% of them went home with me and that was fine.
00:13:16.700 And even the 30 or 40% who didn't go home with me, I could tell that they tried their best. They
00:13:22.540 tried their best to, to get into it. They just didn't feel it. But then I think back in 2015,
00:13:28.620 I met this Asian chick and she was the one who suggested that we should go and get sushi. 0.97
00:13:35.020 And obviously right now it would be a red flag to me. If a girl suggested the place or the restaurant 1.00
00:13:39.820 or the bar, that was, it's a huge red flag, but I didn't know it back then. That was like 10 years ago.
00:13:44.540 Um, she just couldn't make it clearer that she was just there for food. You know,
00:13:49.420 like I tried to make conversation, one word responses. Um, she showed contempt. I tried to
00:13:54.540 sit next to her in the restaurant. She was like, why don't you just go sit opposite me? Don't be so
00:13:59.260 close to me. I was like, you know, that was a bit of a curve ball to me back then. And then after the
00:14:05.020 date, obviously I do my usual thing, which is like, do you want to spend some time back home? Because
00:14:09.420 it's, it's my practice. I make it a habit to ask them to go home with me regardless of how the date went.
00:14:14.060 So, uh, she, obviously she gave me the whole speech. Oh, I gotta go back early. I gotta sleep
00:14:18.940 early. I have work the next day. Um, and that was that. And I went home. I did the whole, um,
00:14:26.780 over analyzing thing. I thought, okay, did I talk too much? Um, did I try to be physical too quickly?
00:14:33.420 Did I sit next to her too soon? Or was I not funny enough? Was my clothes wrong? Did I order the wrong
00:14:39.340 thing in the restaurant for her? Uh, blah, blah, blah. And, and I was very hard on myself. Um,
00:14:45.420 but after a few days, I just, it just hit me that, you know what, hold it, hold on a second. Like
00:14:51.500 she just wanted a free meal and it never hit me before because back in 2015, a foodie call never
00:14:59.260 even heard the term. It wasn't even a thing back then, but it, it affected me so, so, so deeply that,
00:15:06.460 um, I went on the internet. I went on Reddit. Uh, back then there was this sub called r slash
00:15:11.260 seduction. I'm not sure if it's still there. Um, and then I came across this post that this guy
00:15:16.060 was making wild claims. Like, oh, I slept with like, um, you know, I slept with like, uh, 30 girls in the 0.89
00:15:22.940 last like three months or something like that. I was like, give me a break. And I was like, I clicked
00:15:27.180 it and I was like, okay, here's what you do first. You never, ever take them out on a date.
00:15:32.620 I was like, okay, that's bold. Second, you asked him to come over right away.
00:15:38.300 Very, very bold. And then you do this, this, this, and that. When she comes over, you put a whole bunch
00:15:43.100 of stuff on the chairs in your house so that she has no choice, but to sit on the bed, blah, blah, blah.
00:15:46.860 It was this whole blueprint. I was like, huh? Hmm. I was just learning. Uh, I was,
00:15:52.380 I was having my mind open at the time, but, um, it was all very revolutionary to me. And that was
00:15:59.500 back in 2015. And you look at the comments, everyone was so fucking angry. Everyone's like, 0.96
00:16:03.580 you fucking liar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, you know, if, if you did that, I'm the king of England, 1.00
00:16:08.300 you know, nobody believed him, but I, I, I saw it and I was like, he was responding too. So I was like,
00:16:15.580 no way. I'm like, maybe I should try this out. And so I did.
00:16:22.860 Um, cause I had enough volume back then when you have enough volume, when you have enough matches
00:16:26.700 in, in your, um, your Tinder, you're not that scared. You don't have that scarcity mentality
00:16:32.540 because LA is a big city. Yeah. So you have this endless options. And if every day, you know that
00:16:38.460 you're going to get like five or 10 new matches, you don't worry. So I was like, okay, what if I use
00:16:44.860 half of these chicks for an experiment and ask them to come over right away? And then the other half, 0.99
00:16:49.820 half, I just use my, my usual game. And I did that. And a lot of them actually just came right over.
00:16:57.020 So after that, I was like, holy shit, this fucking works. This fucking works. I can just skip the whole 1.00
00:17:01.740 fucking dinner or drinks thing. And these girls will come over. And I did, after that, I just 0.99
00:17:09.020 got rid of the whole dating thing. Cause it made me realize that, you know what they would have come
00:17:13.100 over anyway, the ones who said yes. So why am I indulging in the whole, um, you know, formality
00:17:21.020 of taking them out to a date because they like me, I like them. What's the problem? Why, why do we have
00:17:25.740 to pretend to get to know each other over food when we just really want to get down to it?
00:17:30.860 Yeah. It's incredible that we're, that we're at this point now, because this is, um, this is a
00:17:35.260 relatively new revelation. Like even in my first book, when I wrote it, like my recommendation
00:17:40.380 was, was still at that time. Um, you know, coffee date one or sniff tests, you know,
00:17:46.220 see what they're all about escalate a little bit. Um, and then, you know, if you want to get into the
00:17:50.860 intimacy, like, you know, you can do that round two or something like that. Um, but this strategy,
00:17:56.540 like you've posted the, you know, you've posted the receipts I've seen you post in your timeline or
00:18:01.100 share, uh, screens of some of your other followers that have done the exact same thing.
00:18:06.380 Yes. Um, or, or versions of that, but it always seems to be like the
00:18:10.060 same sort of line that pops up. What is it again? Uh, you should come by my place,
00:18:14.220 have some drinks, watch a movie together. It works. I can't tell why, but it works.
00:18:18.140 So, so how far through drinks, watch a movie together, chit chat, get to know one another,
00:18:24.220 cuddle, et cetera. Like at what point do you usually get to the bank?
00:18:28.300 Okay. So it's, it's very, you know, from a girl's perspective, it's like, oh, this guy is so smooth.
00:18:34.860 You know, everything was just right. We had great chemistry, blah, blah, blah. But for my end,
00:18:39.340 from my perspective, it's actually planned down to like every single detail.
00:18:43.900 So when they first arrive, I always go in for a hug, break the touch barrier right away. Um,
00:18:48.620 I turn off all the lights in my apartment and then I just turn on a movie on Netflix.
00:18:54.460 Uh, I tell them where to sit, which is next to me on the couch. And you know, the drinks thing is
00:19:00.780 really, at first I took it seriously. So I stocked up my, my apartment with like alcohol, you know,
00:19:06.620 liquor, wine, beer, whatever it is that a chick might want to drink. And then I realized that 0.97
00:19:10.860 most of them don't really want to drink. Like it's really just a figure of speech. So anyway,
00:19:15.820 I turn on a movie. I usually pick a movie that's very, um, popular, a movie that everyone has seen.
00:19:22.300 So back in my day, I usually played mean girls because every chick has seen mean girls. I have 1.00
00:19:26.140 seen mean girls millions of times because of the same, you know, I've been playing the same movie over
00:19:30.460 and over again for these chicks. Um, okay. And this is the part where, where it might be a little
00:19:35.100 funny because so get this, I'm only meeting these chicks for the first time. Right. So, um, 0.98
00:19:44.540 a lot of times I'm pretty nervous myself. So what I usually do is I pop a Viagra right before they
00:19:53.020 arrive. And then that thing takes a little time to react in my body. And, uh, while that does its
00:20:00.380 job, I just sit like this with, with my arm across her. And, uh, we just talk because we're, the,
00:20:05.820 the reason I play a movie that everybody has seen is because I don't want her to be paying attention
00:20:09.420 to the movie. That's like, no, that's like, hell no. Like I want to, yeah, it's just white noise.
00:20:14.460 Exactly. So I want her to be, uh, talking to me. Um, I turn off all the lights because,
00:20:18.860 you know, um, it, it works better. You know, girls tend to be, they, they resist more when it's, 1.00
00:20:25.100 there's a light, you know, shining on them, I guess they feel like they're in the spotlight.
00:20:29.660 Um, so I would say about after 30, 40 minutes of chit chat, then I start, uh, I just, because my
00:20:38.220 hands are already here. So I just, just turn her face over to me and then I'll just say, come here,
00:20:43.580 kiss me. And then I'll just go in for the kiss. And then it, it just goes from there because these
00:20:48.700 chicks know, uh, what they're there for. So there's usually very little resistance. 1.00
00:20:54.540 What's your close rate with the strategy? Like, do you ever get rejected? They ever walk out?
00:20:58.940 Like, what's the, um, what's the storyline with that for you? You must have some stories with that.
00:21:04.140 Good question. Good question. You know, like if, uh, you know, anyone who has been following me on
00:21:09.020 X for a while knows that I'm like very anti public date because the rate of closing them is so low
00:21:15.820 because, you know, a lot of girls go out there for free food, free entertainment, free validation, 1.00
00:21:19.820 free attention. Um, and they think that if the girl comes over right away, it's like a surefire
00:21:25.980 thing. And I'm here to tell you after hundreds doing this hundreds of times, it is not a guarantee.
00:21:33.180 I would say the close rates about, it's pretty high. It's pretty high. Uh, I would say about 70,
00:21:37.980 80%, but some girls legit come here. They freeze up. Maybe they're not ready to go ahead with it. 1.00
00:21:45.020 Uh, some of them act, maybe have a change in energy. Maybe they, I don't know, but maybe they
00:21:51.340 feel a bit catfished. Not sure. Um, some of them legit come over with like, um, innocent, uh, ideas.
00:22:00.380 Like this chick came over and she was a college chick and she was like, Oh, I thought I was really
00:22:04.780 just going to do my homework. Cause you said, come over and do my homework. Like, I'm like,
00:22:09.020 Oh my God, get real, man. You can't be that, that freaking dumb. Like that's no way. 1.00
00:22:13.340 But, but she's legit was just trying to do her homework. So I was like, all right,
00:22:17.020 do your homework and then, you know, get out of here, whatever, you know, it happens.
00:22:21.260 So my, my principle is that even for the girls to come over right away, there is a drop-off,
00:22:26.860 like it's not a hundred percent guarantee. So I just don't understand why guys insist on doing
00:22:31.660 things the hard way, meeting them outside. And then the drop-off is like 80, 90%, you know?
00:22:36.860 Yeah. What age range usually data when it comes to inviting them over?
00:22:43.020 Right. So back then I, I set my profile to 18 to 29 and the vast majority of the girls who came over
00:22:52.860 were like, okay, the youngest was 18, obviously. Um, I had some odd ones, like some odd ones in their
00:23:00.540 40s and 50s, but, but mostly they're in their early twenties. So my theory is that girls really 0.99
00:23:07.420 want to get the wild stuff out of the way in their early twenties. Yeah. And then they focus
00:23:14.060 on the serious stuff and they admit to late twenties. So most of them, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um,
00:23:21.420 you've been very vocal, um, and anti marriage. Um, are you, are you anti inviting the government in
00:23:29.020 your house? Are you anti living with a woman? Are you anti, like what part of, of, of marriage is
00:23:34.300 it that repulses you so badly? Oh, I'm empty everything that you mentioned. Yeah. The government
00:23:40.700 thing, the cohabitation thing. Um, the government thing is obvious because we don't want, you'd
00:23:46.220 think it would be obvious, but for a lot of guys, it still isn't. I mean, I just don't get it. I mean,
00:23:50.780 like when I was 18, 19 years old, I thought it was a crazy idea. Like, why would you sign a contract
00:23:55.580 with the state? I know it's the norm, but you know, that doesn't mean you have to do it. And
00:23:59.660 then I looked deeper and deeper into it in my early twenties about how guys were like getting
00:24:03.900 absolutely killed in the courts and the courts didn't help them, but they helped the women.
00:24:07.980 And I was like, so why would you keep doing this? Like you, you know, if a girl likes you,
00:24:13.180 you wouldn't need a piece of paper to bind you together. Um, I I've never understood it. I've,
00:24:19.180 I've said this over and over again on my ex. And there are still like so many guys who are like in
00:24:23.740 denial who are, who are like fighting me on this. So that's the first thing. I don't want the
00:24:28.300 government deciding how I run my finances. That's one thing. The second thing is the whole, the whole
00:24:34.060 cohabitation thing. So even if without the government, I still don't want to live and share
00:24:39.580 my living space with a woman because, um, you, you lose a lot of privacy. Uh, she runs through your 1.00
00:24:44.460 stuff all the time. That's all what all women do. Um, what's that? Have you ever lived with a chick 1.00
00:24:51.580 before I have, uh, only once, only once for eight months and I lasted eight months and that was a
00:24:58.460 miracle and I will never ever do it again. Sorry, man. I didn't mean to interrupt you,
00:25:03.180 but you're going through a list of like, you know, she invades your privacy. You don't like,
00:25:06.540 yes. Yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. Um, she wants to know where, where you're going. Uh, but that's, that's the
00:25:12.940 thing you, you live with a move, a woman. You, you feel that you're becoming less and less masculine
00:25:17.740 over time. There's no way because she has 24, uh, 24, seven access to you. You can act hard and
00:25:23.580 macho and, and hold frame all you want. But if you compare yourself now to two years later,
00:25:31.100 after living with a woman, there will be a significant change and not a good change. 1.00
00:25:35.900 You don't want that. Yeah. There, I mean, there's not a lot of evidence that I've seen that women 1.00
00:25:41.820 behave. I mean, they don't behave better. They don't behave the same. They almost always behave
00:25:48.060 worse. Once you move them in almost. Um, and most guys get punished over the long haul for
00:25:54.860 giving them what they want. Like I've, I mean, like one of the things that I've learned over the
00:25:58.540 last couple of years is that, um, a lot of the times, you know, women want you to do something for 1.00
00:26:04.060 them, like, you know, move in or they want you to stop doing things for them. And, you know, we can talk
00:26:07.580 about the non monogamy part of your life as well, too. Like, uh, like not banging other checks,
00:26:12.940 you know, for example. Um, and a lot of the times I've found that when you give them what they want,
00:26:19.340 or you stop doing what they want you to stop doing, they actually punish you for it. You don't
00:26:23.580 get the net reward. So it's actually better to do what you're going to do anyway.
00:26:27.740 Absolutely. Uh, the thing about giving into chicks is that you think it would make them happy, 0.98
00:26:33.340 but nothing makes them happy. So why would you even try?
00:26:35.980 Yeah. There's an old joke about that with like Adam and Eve. It's like, you know,
00:26:40.540 God gave, you know, Adam, Eve and a beautiful garden and endless food and, you know, life and
00:26:45.500 all this sort of stuff. And Eve was just like, yeah, it's still not good enough.
00:26:48.540 Yeah, exactly. Yep. And, uh, don't try. And, and I think as a man, um, we have to have certain
00:26:55.580 heart lines that in our minds that we wouldn't want to cross no matter which chick it is. And no
00:27:00.460 matter what she says or no matter how she threatens us or issues us an out, an automaton.
00:27:05.980 So for example, if your heart line is, you don't want the government coming into your, uh, bedroom,
00:27:11.020 your house. Um, and she says, marry me or I'll walk. You have to let her walk. You can't just say,
00:27:18.140 all right, I'll make an exception this time. I mean, like, that's, that's like, what's the point of
00:27:23.260 having the rule then. Right. Have you, have you had anybody successfully challenge you on these
00:27:28.700 beliefs or, and you've updated them, you know, last couple of years or something like that said,
00:27:33.500 yeah, you know, maybe that angle is a better way to go. Um, marriage. No, because I know marriage,
00:27:40.060 the truth is on my side. Like, you know, a lot of these track con guys come, come in and say,
00:27:45.100 oh, with marriage, you get children with marriage, you get family, you get companionship,
00:27:49.420 but that's not, I mean, you can have kids without marriage.
00:27:51.580 You can have kids. Oh, well, first of all, I, I would say that's not exactly true for
00:27:55.820 most men because for most men, the price of companionship and children is marriage because
00:28:01.180 no chick is going to just shack up with them without marriage. It depends on the guy. It 1.00
00:28:05.260 really depends on that too. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, but, but it is possible to have companionship,
00:28:11.340 to have children, to have family without marriage. That's, that's one thing. The second thing I always
00:28:16.140 say is that you, you shouldn't let a woman gatekeep, you know, her affections and intimacy. 0.53
00:28:21.580 For you behind the marriage paywall. If she's actually doing that and she says,
00:28:26.940 and she says that, you know, um, your financial like investment in me in a very legal sense
00:28:35.420 is the prerequisite for me to even be nice to you. Then I mean, like, what does that say about her?
00:28:40.860 Like she's not sincere. She doesn't like you basically. I keep trying to tell guys this,
00:28:47.500 but, uh, they disagree. You know, I guess marriage is just very embedded in our culture.
00:28:52.860 It's very, um, normalized. It's something that your friends and family talk about all the time.
00:28:58.700 Oh, when are you getting married? You know, when are you getting hitched? Um, so a lot of guys are
00:29:03.740 not strong enough to, to deviate from the norm. So they try to justify it. What's that?
00:29:09.980 How old were you when you figured that all out?
00:29:12.060 So, so, so I guess I was a little lucky because when I was in high school, I was actually actively
00:29:18.380 dating. I had like, uh, a few chicks like liking me, like I had a girlfriend. And then when I had
00:29:23.340 a girlfriend, I had another chick liking me as well. And then the other chick wanted me to leave, 1.00
00:29:26.860 leave my girlfriend for her. I didn't do that, but I sort of like, I don't want to use the word
00:29:31.660 cheated, but like, you know, I saw her behind my girlfriend's back and all that. So I was like,
00:29:35.900 from a young age, I had this idea that we all have options. So why do I have to sign a contract
00:29:42.380 that says that I'm devoted to this chick, um, for the rest of my life? It makes no sense.
00:29:46.860 And as I grew older and older, I was like, okay, I had the same options as I did in high school.
00:29:51.580 It never occurred to me that marriage would be logical. So it has always perplexed me, my,
00:29:56.700 my entire adult life, basically never made sense. And then I looked into the marriage
00:30:01.180 laws and I was like, okay, hell no. Now it's like, uh, at first it was like, uh, probably not after
00:30:06.220 that it was like, uh, over my dead body, never in my life. Yeah. Yeah. Um, one of the things you
00:30:12.700 often talk about is non-monogamy. There's, there's different, you know, there seems to be different
00:30:18.220 ways that I've seen a lot of guys structure this. Like I've seen guys with a harem with multiple
00:30:24.060 women. Uh, was it Casey Jones that introduced us?
00:30:29.100 I, I'm not sure.
00:30:30.540 No, you don't recognize. Okay. Um, so there's a guy, um, you know, Casey Jones, who's unfortunately,
00:30:37.180 you know, disappeared off of Twitter. I'm not sure what's happening. I know he had some legal issues.
00:30:41.820 Um, you know, there's guys like the Tate brothers that have women that, um, that have their kids and
00:30:47.660 they don't live with them and they basically spend the night from time to time and they do what they
00:30:52.460 want on the side when they want sort of thing. There's guys that will make a commitment to a woman,
00:30:57.660 like give her commitment, but not a hundred percent sexual exclusivity. Um, there's guys
00:31:03.020 that are just completely open and just bang everything. I just tell them that what's your,
00:31:06.220 what's your model for non-monogamy and why did you select that model?
00:31:11.260 So I haven't been monogamous since, since literally high school. And even back in high school,
00:31:17.980 in college, I was, I was cheating on my girlfriend. So, um, I've never been monogamous. That's one thing.
00:31:23.420 Um, most of the time I've been single, I think hooking up is a very good way of being non-monogamous.
00:31:30.220 So if you get good at the apps, you get good at cold approach, whatever it is, that's perfect model.
00:31:35.580 Um, but, but sometimes with, with hookups, the problem is that it's very time consuming. It
00:31:40.060 really doesn't matter how good you are, how efficient you are. I became very efficient. I could get a match
00:31:46.620 and I could close her. I can convince her to come over within like 30 minutes of time. And when she 0.97
00:31:52.220 comes over, I take maybe an hour, an hour and a half to, to get rid of her. Um, but even then it's
00:31:59.100 very time consuming. You have to go to the gym, you have to constantly swipe. Um, so usually at some
00:32:05.260 point you will, you will want some kind of stability in the form of a girlfriend, quote unquote. 0.94
00:32:11.660 Right. Um, there's many ways that there are many ways that guys can do it. Um, if you want,
00:32:18.060 and if you are able to swing it, ideally the best way is to get, uh, have a dude threesomes all the
00:32:24.940 time. Um, but that obviously requires her to be by, and she also has to want to share you out. And she 1.00
00:32:33.580 also has to see you as sort of like a buffer in, on the SMB scale in order to allow that. Um,
00:32:41.980 other guys do like a open relationship, meaning that you can do whatever you want. I can do whatever
00:32:47.580 I want. I don't think that's a good model. Um, let me just stop you there for a sec,
00:32:51.980 because I think I saw you at one point say, um, why would you care if she bangs somebody else?
00:32:58.620 Was that you did say that? And I caught a lot of flack for that. Okay. So you change your mind
00:33:05.420 on that then? No, no, no, no, no, no, um, um, no, no, no, whatever works for you works. Um,
00:33:12.700 some guys really don't care. Okay. So some guys are like hardcore mate garters, right? Like,
00:33:18.940 oh, you can't see this guy. He can't go on a girl's trip. You know, you can't go to the club, 0.99
00:33:23.340 whatever. Um, there are guys like me who are like, you know, if I had a say in it,
00:33:29.820 I would say you can't do all that stuff. But then I also realized that I can't do anything.
00:33:34.700 I really can't stop you. I can't surveil over her 24 seven. I, I, you know, I don't have a GPS
00:33:42.060 tracker on her all the time. So it's a mate guarding part that you take an issue with.
00:33:46.140 Yes. Yes. No, it's not because I don't think mate guarding is useful or important,
00:33:50.780 but I just don't see how it can practically work in real life. I mean, you have a life,
00:33:56.780 you have work, you have, you know, your own family, you have other things to worry about.
00:34:01.580 And, um, what are you going to do anyway? You're not going to run through a phone all the time.
00:34:06.460 You're not going to, uh, you know, tracker on GPS tracker and all that. And so at the end of the day,
00:34:12.540 when you say that you're monogamous with your wife, it's really based on an honor system. It's just
00:34:18.700 based on it's based on faith, right? You have no idea of verifying that she's actually, um,
00:34:24.780 loyal quote unquote. So no, I'm just, I don't want to sound too black pill on this, but the truth is
00:34:31.740 you can't, you can't stop her from doing whatever she wants because she has agency and you don't have
00:34:38.140 eyes on her 24 seven. That's basically my point. I find that women, once they've sort of latched 1.00
00:34:45.340 their trailer to the best guy that they can get for the most part, most other guys become invisible
00:34:50.700 to them. Um, and you can pretty much tell them like, look, you know, I, I'm, you know,
00:34:57.020 I'm going to give you my commitment, but I'm not going to give you a hundred percent sexual
00:35:00.460 exclusivity. Um, and it needs to be closed on your end. Like I can't let the well be poisoned
00:35:04.700 or something like that. Um, but I get your point about like the main, yeah, you can do that. Um,
00:35:12.140 whether she actually holds up her end of the bargain, who knows? Yeah. To be determined,
00:35:17.340 I suppose. Um, what other controversial takes have you had? There's, there's been so many,
00:35:22.220 I lost track of them, dude. I, I should have spent some time going through your feed and jotting
00:35:26.780 down some more, but what other controversial takes? So when we, when we say controversial,
00:35:31.020 I guess it means controversial among the red pill community. Um, so we were talking about non-monogamy,
00:35:36.460 for example, I said that, um, being in the swinging lifestyle is a legitimate method,
00:35:41.980 for example, to pursue a non-monogamous relationship. And everyone said it was
00:35:47.020 degenerate. Everyone said it was like a cock strategy. Oh, you're a cock. You let other men 0.98
00:35:51.500 bang your wife. And I was like, okay, but what if you bang their wife as well? And they're like, 0.99
00:35:57.340 I don't care. It's still degenerate. You know what I mean?
00:35:59.260 Like swinging type of communities, you know, for the most part is most of the chicks are gross. 1.00
00:36:08.860 Most, but you know, I've been, first of all, full disclosure, I've, I've been swinging for many,
00:36:14.380 many years. So I don't want to, I don't want to act like, you know, it's them. It's a damn thing.
00:36:18.700 It's, it's also a me thing. Um, but, but there are, there are gems. Okay. Right. So the thing about 0.99
00:36:27.020 gross chicks is that if you have, it's going to sound bad because it sounds like human trafficking, 1.00
00:36:33.260 but if you have a good looking wife or partner to swap, then you'll tend to have access to better
00:36:39.020 looking wives and girlfriends as well from the other end, if that makes sense.
00:36:42.940 Sure. You got an eight, you're going to get an eight, right?
00:36:44.700 Right, right, right. Because you're not going to have an eight and then you're going to,
00:36:49.180 you're not going to accept a swap of a five for that. You know what I mean?
00:36:53.100 You don't want to hand the keys to the Ferrari and take the keys to a key.
00:36:56.220 Right. Right. But the thing about swinging is that guys take women too seriously. And, and this is,
00:37:02.220 this is just not about swinging. This is about guys having that Disney mindset of placing a woman,
00:37:08.860 a woman on a pedestal. Like even, even the quote unquote red pill guys, they take women very seriously
00:37:14.060 because they, they, they, they vet for a woman as if you can do that. And then they call them
00:37:21.740 this woman, my woman, like my woman, and they become so invested in that one woman.
00:37:27.180 Um, they foresee them living with that woman for the next 10, 20, 30 years. And they sort of like
00:37:35.020 make that woman an integral part of, of everything they do. And to me, I'm like,
00:37:41.340 that's probably not the right philosophy with women because women are very erratic. Women have 1.00
00:37:46.940 their own agency. They can change at a dime. And the more seriously you take them, the more
00:37:53.340 in trouble you'll be with them. My philosophy with women is that, you know, if I don't like you, 1.00
00:37:58.540 I swap you out. I change you out because they're bolt on. I've talked about this before. They are bolt
00:38:02.940 on their add ons and they can be removed and added at any time. They will never encroach on, you know,
00:38:09.180 the, the core of me, you know? So they're really just optional. And even for the, the, the quote
00:38:15.500 unquote LTRs that I'm in, like if she leaves tomorrow, well, she leaves, I get another chick 1.00
00:38:20.700 and I never make anything permanent. I never make anything. I never get, I never bind myself at the
00:38:26.700 hip to them and become inseparable. For example, I wouldn't buy a property with them.
00:38:30.620 Yeah. Um, so here's an interesting question. Like at what point do you have the conversation with
00:38:36.300 them when, you know, she's like, Hey, Jay, I dig your vibe. I want to claim you. I don't want to
00:38:41.260 share you sort of thing. Like at what point do you have the, um, yeah, but I'm still going to bang
00:38:45.980 other chicks, like talk with them. See, there's, there's no, um, there's no fixed rule for this, 0.99
00:38:53.180 but usually if a girl wants to claim you, she's going for the, the whole, um, she's in her full, 1.00
00:39:01.100 fully in her agenda mode. Um, she's not most of the time, she's not going to accept non-monogamy, 0.90
00:39:08.140 even if you're like her best option, or even if you were her chat or anything, if she's in her
00:39:14.060 agenda mode, she probably want a beta who is loyal to her. And then this is contrary to what most,
00:39:19.360 when you say agenda mode, you mean like, uh, she's ready to settle down and have kids. Is that what
00:39:23.740 you mean? Yes. Yes. She wants to get the ring. She wants to get the wedding, the wedding, the 1.00
00:39:28.220 proposal, the whole nine yards, you know, she wants to be someone, she wants to not be a loser on 1.00
00:39:34.320 Instagram and within a friend group. So with that, you know, she's, she's like 80, 90% optimized for
00:39:41.640 security. So she doesn't really care about whether she likes the guy or not. And if she's ever in that
00:39:46.400 mode, then, um, you don't, you don't actually have an advantage as a quote unquote alpha. So,
00:39:53.040 um, if she's ever in that mode, I would say, just let her go. If she's not in that mode,
00:39:57.580 then most of the time you can really just, just drag it on this whole, um, ambiguity thing.
00:40:04.460 And they would tolerate it. That's why I always tell guys to date, uh, girls who are really young, 0.97
00:40:10.220 start at 18, 19, you can write that out for like seven, eight, nine years before she even has any
00:40:16.580 kind of agenda mode. And that would be plenty, uh, for you to have a shit ton of fun with her.
00:40:21.900 For example, my best friend, um, he lives in Australia. He unfortunately got divorced in 20,
00:40:29.660 like four years ago, 2021. Uh, cause his wife, I, I, you know, I told him back then,
00:40:35.580 I told him not to, not to shack up with these undocumented chicks. Cause he has this thing for 1.00
00:40:43.060 Vietnamese chicks. I, I don't know why for the life of me, uh, I told him not to wipe her up. 1.00
00:40:48.100 He did it anyway. And then once she got her papers, she just, you know, up and left. And,
00:40:53.280 you know, he tried to bag and try to work it out. It didn't matter because, because she planned this
00:40:57.780 from the very start, you know? So I, I, I told him, right. For the next girl, you know, uh, first of all, 0.96
00:41:03.320 don't date these undocumented chicks. Second of all, try to go as young as you can. And, 1.00
00:41:08.180 and he did that. He, he found a girl who was like 19 years old. He was like 30 something back then.
00:41:12.800 Um, and it worked out really well. And, uh, right now she's like 20, 24, I think she's 24 right now.
00:41:20.320 Um, and, and they're having a great time. So that's, that's why I always try to tell guys,
00:41:24.620 if you want to have a girlfriend, try to get as young as possible. That's when they're 0.80
00:41:29.320 maximally fun. If you get one, that's like in 25 or 27 couple of years, max, she's going to start, 0.93
00:41:36.340 um, pressuring you for marriage.
00:41:38.820 I've seen you, um, from time to time, make some references to red pill, the manosphere,
00:41:43.800 stuff like that. What's your, what's your overarching take on the manosphere? I'm curious what your,
00:41:49.640 what your position is of these guys.
00:41:51.220 So, you know, I think that as mainstream, um, as, as the red pill becomes more mainstream,
00:41:58.440 it has to, unfortunately become mainstream though.
00:42:04.160 No, no, no. I get it. But, but it's all relative. Cause back then, like 10, 15 years ago,
00:42:08.860 it was very, very niche. But as more and more guys learn about it, it has to adapt itself to be,
00:42:14.940 uh, more and more mainstream palatable. So nowadays I feel like the red pill is more like,
00:42:21.100 when, for example, when you talk about red pill marriage, to me, that doesn't make any sense to
00:42:25.700 me. Like how do you do a red pill marriage in the West? No, no, no freaking way. It's not possible
00:42:31.960 at all. Yeah. So you make reference to Rollo on that. Right, right, right. So, so when you're
00:42:36.680 talking about red pill marriages, it's like, that's an oxymoron. Uh, but I also realized that
00:42:42.400 the whole space needs to evolve to try to, um, uh, uh, include as many men into the fold. So over time,
00:42:50.120 I feel like the red pill space is becoming just more of like a trad con light or trad con alt,
00:42:55.460 uh, sort of, um, uh, school of thought. And you need to ultimately, you need to have your own
00:43:04.960 philosophy, your own philosophy. That's different from like, what's, what's out there. What's textbook
00:43:11.020 red pill, um, philosophy, because that's how, you know, that you really have a mind of your own
00:43:17.480 and that you're really acting in your own best interest. Cause if, if you don't have any views
00:43:21.820 that are controversial in the red pill space, then, and then you're really just a follower.
00:43:26.720 What's, what's the difference between, you know, being pro marriage versus, you know, a fan of red
00:43:32.800 pill marriage, whatever that means, you know, to me, it's like two sides of the same coin.
00:43:36.320 Yeah. I don't, I don't see marriage ever. I mean, the problem that I have with like, I mean,
00:43:43.480 I've talked about the manuscript before I used to collab with a lot of these guys years ago. 0.92
00:43:46.600 I don't fucking work with any of them now. Um, I got a new book coming out in November and I
00:43:51.060 exposed a lot of the details of the manuscript. I call it the man-o-swamp now. Um, but they've got
00:43:56.580 all these different colored pills. Like you have these guys that are white pill, black pill,
00:44:00.040 red pill, purple pill, fucking orange pill. It's like, everybody has like a slight deviation 0.99
00:44:05.180 and ideology. And then they're like, we're going to call it this color pill. And it's like this
00:44:08.700 obsession with pills kind of gets really into the weeds and nonsense. And it's like, there's either
00:44:15.260 it works for you, it doesn't work for you. And I think there's a lot of, um, a lot of arguing and
00:44:21.700 infighting and, um, clout chasing, um, drama creation, you know, between a lot of the creators,
00:44:29.100 which is one of the things that just bothered the hell in me. Cause I was already proficient and
00:44:33.080 successful before I even got sucked into the Ford, like manosphere sort of stuff. Um, and most of
00:44:39.360 these guys weren't, they were running from the law. They gotten people incarcerated, uh, for, um,
00:44:45.480 following their pickup artistry, uh, ticks, uh, tricks and tips. Um, anyway, I've broken that all
00:44:53.160 down in the book. So I'll leave that for you guys for November, but I just wanted to get your take on
00:44:58.180 the whole like manosphere stuff from your angle. Cause you don't, you don't seem to indulge in it,
00:45:02.400 but at the same time you seem to sort of get it without being a collaborator in it, if I can put
00:45:07.560 it that way. Right. Um, like, like, I mean, you're probably more, more familiar with the, the, the state
00:45:14.400 of the space. Um, I'm not so much in the space. I mean, I, I have my own audience on X. I say whatever
00:45:20.300 comes to mind. Um, but I, I think it's important for every man to have views. Like I said, views that
00:45:28.020 contradict, um, what your favorite, uh, manosphere guy is saying. I mean, if you, for example, if you
00:45:33.420 listen to Fresh and Fit, for example, or, um, you listen to Rolo, um, you should have your own takes
00:45:40.540 that are slightly different from theirs, because that's how you know you're serving your own, um,
00:45:46.400 your own interests, your own needs. I mean, at the end of the day, we're all here for self-improvement.
00:45:50.600 Um, so, um, we are trying to make our lives better. We are trying to level up with women.
00:45:56.420 So it's, it's not so much about following a religion. It's about doing what works for you.
00:46:00.920 Yeah. Yeah. Um, okay. So we talked about the, the dating aspect. We covered the marriage part.
00:46:09.960 I mean, is there any part of marriage that makes any sense to you? Is there any part of living with
00:46:13.880 a woman that makes like, is there a time in your life that you think that this would make sense?
00:46:17.900 Like I would do this? Hmm. Well, first of all, they have to give men a lot more rights than they 0.95
00:46:24.080 do today. That's one thing, but even kind of rights in the need for it to make more sense for you,
00:46:30.040 uh, for marriage, obviously, um, you have to get rid of no fault divorce that, that is a cancer. 1.00
00:46:37.660 That wouldn't really solve anything though. Like that's, um, that's a trad con talking point.
00:46:41.800 I've heard a lot from guys like Charlie Kirk and Matthew Walsh and Jordan Peterson and stuff like
00:46:46.540 that, but it's like women will just manufacture a way to get divorced anyway. It's not like they 1.00
00:46:51.240 didn't do it before. No fault divorce. Right. I think it's more of an angle of you need to reform
00:46:56.760 family law. So it's default 50, 50 custody always. Um, child support is only in the amount that's,
00:47:04.120 uh, that's in the need of the child. There's no alimony. You know, if you're such a strong
00:47:08.360 independent woman, you can stand on your own two feet. You don't need my money and my shit. You can 1.00
00:47:11.740 walk away with what you had to start. Um, and I think marriage should probably be a lease agreement 0.91
00:47:17.220 where you can renew it after a certain period of time. Right. Like you just walk away. It's like
00:47:21.860 after five years, you don't want to continue to drive that vehicle. There's too many problems.
00:47:25.380 You just walk away with it, but there might be some conditions if you have kids. Sure. I like to ask
00:47:29.960 these questions just to hear what's going on other guys' minds, you know, when it comes to marriage.
00:47:33.440 The thing is that if you do the lease agreement is that, uh, you've been co-mingling finances and
00:47:38.800 assets for years. So how do you resolve that? Yeah. But if you just reform it completely and
00:47:44.520 it's like, there's no division of assets, you just leave with what you had. Right. And you can
00:47:48.560 untie them out a certain, you know, period of time. There's, there's some contingencies that I would
00:47:53.060 put in that. Cause I think it's important for kids to have good access to both parents and
00:47:56.120 they're probably better off being raised by both parents, but there's a lot of complexities involved
00:48:00.080 in that. I think we got to do away completely with toxic feminism and it's in its current model right 1.00
00:48:04.800 now because it's, it's so hostile towards children, um, fathers. And we see what happens
00:48:12.160 in single mother households. I mean, the vast majority of kids today, well, not the vast
00:48:15.300 majority, I think it's 43% of kids come from single mother households and they're literally beta 1.00
00:48:20.880 factories, right? Like they turn girls into whores and boys into beta males. And there's not a lot of 0.99
00:48:26.040 productive, like production that comes out in a society out of it, if you know what I mean.
00:48:30.080 Um, which sucks because I mean the whole point of us being here is to scatter seed and have kids and
00:48:35.980 all that sort of stuff, but there's, but there's no benefit to it now. I don't see any benefit to
00:48:39.560 it for most guys anyway. A lot of downsides. Yeah. The thing about, uh, reforming divorce is that I
00:48:45.940 think if we look at China, uh, recently they had a new, uh, law that says that anyone who purchases
00:48:53.240 the property and pays for the property within a marriage, uh, holds onto it after divorce. So, um,
00:48:59.280 that's going to take some time for us to see what effect it's going to have. But, uh, it's,
00:49:03.840 it's interesting to note that China is trying to do something about this. They know that, uh,
00:49:09.600 divorce is, is giving a lot of men pause and, and China also, but guys still march into divorce
00:49:17.260 routinely, man. It's like, you know, their goal. They think that if I get married and I do the right
00:49:22.320 thing, she's going to love me forever and care for my children and be respectful and kind and offer me 1.00
00:49:27.180 unlimited sexual opportunities whenever I want them. It's like, none of that shit's true, man. 0.99
00:49:31.540 If you like getting laid, don't get married. That's, that's why I try. I just don't understand 0.99
00:49:35.780 about guys is that, you know, women have been exposed as these like calculated coal mercenaries.
00:49:42.100 They're ruthlessly pregnant. They're not really that way though. Well, I mean, they're just women. 1.00
00:49:47.300 Way more than we think they are. You know, if you watch movies and you watch, um, TV shows and you
00:49:52.760 watch Disney, you know, films, you think that women are these innocent creatures, but they're 1.00
00:49:57.720 not right. So there, there, there's more than meets the eye when it comes to women. So the point 1.00
00:50:03.140 is that they're, they're a little more, um, calculated than we think basically. And I just
00:50:12.160 don't see why, why men once hold on to this idealism and this, um, this idea that, that they're in love
00:50:21.040 and that they're romantics. It's wild though, because I mean, there's this book, um, it's
00:50:25.380 called the history of marriage and the whole point of marriage throughout history was the acquisition
00:50:29.460 of in-laws, right? It's like, we didn't have police and government and law enforcement, all
00:50:33.720 that kind of shit. And it's like, you know, I've got three brothers and we got farms and 0.99
00:50:37.240 a blacksmith and a, I don't know, a cobbler shop or something like that. And she's got a doctor
00:50:42.240 in her family and a teacher that can, you know, like educate children sort of thing. You just 0.89
00:50:46.140 sort of like acquire in-laws and, and you can pass down your shit to your kids. Like that 1.00
00:50:50.660 was the original notion of, of, of marriage and love had nothing to do with it. Like
00:50:55.300 if you look at the court records and the diaries of the people that they kept over the years,
00:50:59.020 love had nothing to do. It was about acquiring in-laws, having kids and leaving some shit 0.99
00:51:03.260 to them. Um, but that's all been like bastardized and twisted around. I'm not exactly sure when, 0.99
00:51:07.840 but it's, but it's a complete like upside down oopsie sort of thing. And you get the random
00:51:13.320 guys like the Matt Walsh is the world. They're all like, Oh, the marriage is the best thing
00:51:16.380 that ever happened to me. And you all should go get married too, because it worked out really
00:51:19.220 well for me. And it's like, yeah, so far, but like, let's make sure that we insert so
00:51:23.520 far. Um, because for most guys, it's not the sweet spot. And even for the guys where it's
00:51:29.260 a sweet spot. And I surveyed an audience on this at one point, one of the things that a
00:51:33.660 lot of the guys said is the only reason why my marriage is a sweet spot. One of the stronger
00:51:37.640 components was because she wasn't a hoe when I married her. Right. So it's like, she didn't 1.00
00:51:41.860 run around. She didn't have that experience. She wants to stick around. She's not easy to 0.99
00:51:45.520 sort of like bounce and go on to the next guy, but that's what they got a hundred years ago is
00:51:50.100 you got an agreeable virgin. Today you get a disagreeable bitch that's been with, you know, 1.00
00:51:53.480 50, a hundred guys or whatever. Absolutely. Yeah. Um, the thing about marriage is that you, 1.00
00:51:59.040 you said something about at some point it, it became something else. Uh, I think the love
00:52:03.180 marriages thing, like marrying for love things start started in the 1800s or something like that. 0.96
00:52:09.060 And then over time it just became more and more democratized and like regular people
00:52:14.060 get married, you know, like everyone got married and I guess it just became, it became whatever it
00:52:21.900 is today. Um, yeah, we talked about, um, kids before, I think, um, we were, we were chatting about
00:52:29.300 marriage and you can't really have kids without marriage, but I, I wasn't sure if we got that on
00:52:34.540 the same page, but was that what you were saying? Like you can't have kids without marriage or can you
00:52:38.700 have kids without marriage? No, no, no. You absolutely can have kids without marriage. 0.86
00:52:42.400 What I'm saying is that for most men having kids without marriage will be out of reach for them
00:52:48.260 because they're going to have trouble finding a woman who is willing to bear their children with 1.00
00:52:53.720 no financial guarantees. That's the reality. You know, we'd like to say that we'd like to say
00:52:58.660 that, Oh, you can have kids without marriage. Yes. If you're of a certain caliber or if you're of a 0.54
00:53:03.700 certain caliber, a chick would do anything for you without marriage. Yeah, exactly. Right. But if you're not 1.00
00:53:08.440 off a certain caliber, then the price of admission for you is at the very minimum marriage. Yeah.
00:53:13.660 And that's the thing that I think destroys a lot of guys is they agree to commit to a woman and give
00:53:19.220 her her, her wedding, her big party, the honeymoon, the house, the ring, the kids and all that sort of 0.96
00:53:24.340 shit. But I think for the vast majority of guys that get in a marriage now, they're not her first 0.50
00:53:28.620 choice and she resents the guy. Um, and she doesn't, she doesn't like, it's not keeping her glued to
00:53:34.880 the guy. If you know what I mean? It's like, she kind of fucking hates the guy. I think you,
00:53:38.480 you've shared, you know, post before I, again, you know, I wish I queued it up, but she had one
00:53:43.900 about, um, this chick that, uh, was traveling Europe. I think you said, we don't hate women 1.00
00:53:49.600 enough or something like that. Oh, here it is. Life hack. You know, she visited 14 cities and six 0.53
00:53:56.720 countries. And it's like, you know, she traveled around on like the dime of like beta male dorks that,
00:54:02.460 that like gave her the tour of the city, but, um, spent the night with the chads, you know,
00:54:07.140 sort of thing. Right. And this is a lot more common than we would like to, we would like to
00:54:11.940 admit to ourselves. It's a lot more common. What, what, what percentage of marriages do you think,
00:54:17.800 um, exists today where the woman has contempt for the guy because he wasn't her first choice?
00:54:26.080 I would say the vast majority. Uh, first of all, women don't get to marry their first choice. 1.00
00:54:32.000 That's most of the time. Yeah. Because their first choice have a shit ton of options. So, um,
00:54:37.860 most of them are not even the marrying kind, you know, because her, a lot of these chicks, 1.00
00:54:43.560 they're alpha widowed and they're alpha widowed because they couldn't make their alpha commit
00:54:48.640 and time is running out. So they just went for the first, the first chump who's, who's available. 1.00
00:54:55.740 So that's, that's a fact. That's a fact. I'm not going to, um, sugarcoat it. The other thing is that, 0.72
00:55:02.820 um, they try their very best to either convince themselves that, you know, they like this guy,
00:55:09.480 or they try to learn to like this guy, or they try to convince themselves that he's alpha in certain
00:55:15.060 ways or whatever. But, you know, once you're alpha widowed, it's, it's just not possible until
00:55:19.800 you find the next guy who can actually measure up or even exceed that guy who is renting space for
00:55:26.680 free in your head. So, you know, I, I, I always tell guys if, if it's possible, you know, try to
00:55:33.940 look for a girl who's not alpha widowed, but you just don't know. How, how do you know you can't vet
00:55:38.260 for this? Yeah. It's, it's tough. I mean, they don't wear a t-shirt that says, you know,
00:55:43.400 12 years ago. Yeah. So you don't know, you really don't know you roll the dice and that's,
00:55:51.240 that's the thing. If you don't know, you shouldn't make a decision, but I guess for,
00:55:54.420 for a lot of guys, they, if I look at my friends that, you know, the, the, the guys I went to school
00:56:00.380 with, a lot of them got married in their late twenties, early thirties. Um, most of them have never
00:56:05.840 dated in high school and they basically just married the first guy, uh, the first girl who
00:56:11.380 liked them back. And that's a very bad idea. Yeah. That's a very, very bad joke about that.
00:56:15.980 Jed, you know, I tell guys all the time, what, like the first girl that touches your PP and
00:56:19.300 responds to your text, like you're going to marry her. And that's most guys strategy, right?
00:56:22.700 Right. Right. No, no, no. But it makes sense from their, their perspective because, you know,
00:56:26.760 they've lived 20, however many years or 30, however many years, no girl has ever liked them back.
00:56:31.460 No guy, no girl has even looked in their direction. So when they had,
00:56:35.840 the first girl was like willing to touch their PP, their first instinct is to lock them down 1.00
00:56:40.060 immediately with marriage so that she can't run away because they don't want to live that, 0.96
00:56:44.560 that life ever again. You know, they have this huge scarcity mentality about them. Yeah.
00:56:51.380 What do you think the main contributors are to the degradation, the decline of the experience that
00:56:58.920 men, and I guess maybe women have over the term of a long-term relationship? Like what do you
00:57:04.660 think contributes or what happens? Because, you know, they did this study, uh, Aaron and Acevedo,
00:57:11.040 I'm probably pronouncing the name is wrong. I quoted my first book, but after something like
00:57:15.100 eight odd years, they surveyed hundreds of people. And it was only something like 13% reported being in
00:57:21.060 a state of love with one another. And only 3% reported, uh, being in a state of bliss, like obsession,
00:57:27.140 which is kind of like what they sell you with marriage. Like, Oh, get married and you'll be in
00:57:30.380 blissful existence, you know, into perpetuity sort of thing. But it rarely happens like for the,
00:57:35.400 for most people's experiences. And I think for men, it's, it's, it's worse than women because women, 1.00
00:57:40.460 they definitely have a sharper decline in attraction for the guy than the guy does for a guy. It's a
00:57:44.500 little slower woman. It's more like a hockey stick. I'm just curious, you know, from your observations, 1.00
00:57:48.620 what do you think it is that contributes to the decline of long-term relationships and the
00:57:53.580 happiness that they have for each other? Cause very few over the years, like we got Deborah Brady in the
00:57:58.100 chat. She's been here for a while. She's been married forever. She always talks about how great
00:58:00.920 her marriage is, but very few people have that experience. Right. Um, well, first of all,
00:58:06.460 we have to see if it's even biological. Maybe we're not meant to be monogamous or mate with the same
00:58:12.640 partner for that long. We don't know. I mean, you know, research has to look into that. Um, the other
00:58:17.740 thing is obviously, I think it's pretty conclusive that we're not monogamous or we're not very good at
00:58:21.780 monogamy. You know, I can put it there you go. There you go. So that's, that's obviously part of it.
00:58:25.380 Um, the other thing is that, um, you know, the different people just have a different
00:58:30.340 threshold. Like for me, like I lasted eight months in my, my cohabitation relationship. Um,
00:58:36.320 it's, it's just over time, over time, familiarity breeds contempt and you see more and more.
00:58:43.720 Yeah. You see more and more of them that you wish you didn't see. And over eight years, 10 years,
00:58:49.400 it's like, um, you know, that person inside out and, um, for, I guess for, for women, they, 0.99
00:58:55.740 they tend to get fatter as well. I mean, I hate to cast, you know, I don't want to generalize,
00:58:59.960 but a lot of them get really fat and really uncamped. They don't care about their appearance,
00:59:04.480 the grooming after a while. And, and we, we men are very visual. So, you know, if you,
00:59:10.640 you have that in your house and, you know, you have to be seen in public with her and all that, 0.97
00:59:15.380 that compromises your quality of life, that's definitely part of it.
00:59:20.300 Yeah. I think that proximity has a strong contributor to that. Cause when you're in
00:59:24.740 the close proximity to somebody, you know, their habits become annoying, their behaviors,
00:59:30.000 their little mannerisms or the little indignities and they sort of pile up and you begin to like
00:59:34.580 resent, you know, it's a whole, like never meet your hero, you know, sort of thing.
00:59:38.960 Right. And I did propose an alternative model before for my, for my, uh,
00:59:45.380 follows an ax. I said, okay, so you don't have to live with her, but that doesn't mean that, um,
00:59:52.700 you can't have some, enjoy some of the, uh, you know, the, the, the benefits of living together
00:59:59.680 with her. So that's why I tell her, I tell people to have your girlfriend over on the weekends. 0.88
01:00:03.800 So she stays over on Friday and Saturday, and then you send her packing on Sunday.
01:00:08.380 And I've, I've experimented, I've, I've experimented with a large, uh, number of things.
01:00:12.820 And this is a model that a lot of guys in the comments have reported just works. It works.
01:00:17.920 It worked for 10 years. It works for 20 years. Just keep doing that. You know, she maintains
01:00:21.600 her own residence. You maintain your residence. You can stay over at hers or she can stay over
01:00:25.500 at yours, but you never make it like a full-time thing. And that works exactly.
01:00:29.260 Yeah. They call it together, living apart. And I think that's, that's certainly going to prolong
01:00:35.020 the, the slow decay of most long-term relationships because you have that time apart.
01:00:40.880 And if you want to slow the decay further, you make it non-monogamous, you know,
01:00:45.240 dude, I was just about to say, so there's three ities. Like, that's why I asked you the question
01:00:49.100 because I wanted to see where you're at. You know, I wrote about this in my next book. I think
01:00:52.720 proximity, familiarity, and exclusivity are the three ities that kill long-term desire
01:00:57.420 in a relationship and exclusivity, uh, especially. Yeah. Well, it's really funny because women will 1.00
01:01:05.480 put up with a lot of shit early on in the relationship. They'll say things like, look, 0.99
01:01:09.940 I know you're probably seeing anybody else. If you are, just be safe. Like they'll sort of drop
01:01:13.180 some kind of a soundbite like that and they'll put up with it. But then at some point for most guys,
01:01:18.580 they'll, they'll end up just abandoning other options because it hurts her or he sees that it hurts
01:01:25.900 her and he doesn't want her hurt because he loves her at that point. So he makes some sacrifices at
01:01:31.400 that point. And what usually ends up happening, I've noticed is that, um, guys usually get punished
01:01:37.300 for giving her what she wants, right? Like she becomes more distance, colder, less intimacy. The
01:01:44.040 enthusiasm with which intimacy happens is on the decline sort of thing. Um, so it's an interesting
01:01:51.380 balancing act because I, I don't think marching into marriage, like guys like Jordan Peterson 0.97
01:01:55.540 fucking advocate for people. Like he's got this course. I, um, behind the paywall on daily, 0.97
01:02:01.100 on daily wire on a marriage. It was like a three part series. I'm like, okay, you know,
01:02:04.900 I talk about marriage and divorce and stuff like that. So let's go behind the paywall and see what
01:02:09.540 this is. There was nothing there. It was, it was, don't be a pussy and just marry her. You know, 1.00
01:02:13.480 you have to, like, you just can't date a woman. You can't love a woman. You have to get married to 1.00
01:02:17.560 her in the eyes of the court. And I'm like, this is some shitty ass advice here. Right. 1.00
01:02:20.980 And it's like, there's nothing like, Hey, take a look at her medicine cabinet and see what med she's
01:02:25.460 on. She might be a psychopath, you know, or doing some basic vetting, like some actionable sort of 0.99
01:02:31.440 advice. And I've actually come to the conclusion. I think that proximity familiarity and too much 0.77
01:02:36.140 exclusivity for a woman is what kills desire in a long-term relationship. And that's a hill that I'm
01:02:42.900 prepared to die on and debate anybody on by the way, because I've seen enough of it.
01:02:46.860 Right. You talk about the exclusivity where she tells you to be exclusive to her. She wants to
01:02:51.400 claim you and all that. You know, I always see that as a shit test. First of all, first of all, 1.00
01:02:56.920 it doesn't make her like you more. That's obvious because you're falling into her frame. Monogamy is 1.00
01:03:03.380 her frame. It's not our frame. You know, our biological imperative is to spare our seat. R and Y. But the
01:03:08.720 other thing is that you don't want to lose your edge. Like you don't want to only have sex because you
01:03:16.020 are providing for the person you're having sex with. You want to be capable of having sex with 0.98
01:03:21.560 other girls just based on your looks, your presentation, your charisma, whatever it is. 1.00
01:03:26.760 Did you ever see that bit that Patrice O'Neill did on the fishing boat?
01:03:30.280 What's that?
01:03:31.140 Did you ever see the bit that Patrice O'Neill did on the fishing boat?
01:03:34.180 No, I'm not familiar with that one.
01:03:35.940 I'm going to send it to you because it explains exactly what it is you're talking about. But carry
01:03:40.420 on. I'll send it to you afterwards.
01:03:41.800 Okay. Yeah. So, so I just think that's very important because you don't know what the future
01:03:47.840 holds. You don't know if she's going to leave you tomorrow. You don't know if she's going to cheat on 1.00
01:03:50.820 you or, or just make life very miserable for you. So you want to always keep that edge so that you
01:03:57.460 know that you can get another woman at any time, regardless of how long you've been in a relationship
01:04:02.800 or God forbid marriage with her. So, um, that that's very important. It's, it's not just important for
01:04:09.600 women. It's important for your general quality of life, your confidence, your self-esteem. 1.00
01:04:14.100 And, um, I just, I just think it's a tremendous waste of life. If I, for example, for me, if I
01:04:21.540 spend a year, just fucking one girl over and over again, I consider that a failure. So, you know, 0.98
01:04:26.560 that would be a huge, you know, a huge emergency situation that I need to rectify immediately.
01:04:32.540 And, um, you know, you can, you have a number of ways to do it. You can do it through,
01:04:36.560 you know, you have a rotation, you can do hookups. I don't recommend prostitutes obviously, 1.00
01:04:42.380 because that's just giving up. Um, a lot of guys will say otherwise. Um, the problem that I have 0.66
01:04:48.100 with paying for it and prostitution, I know guys do it, but it's like you have natural,
01:04:54.540 genuine burning desire where a woman will do anything for you if, and, and to you and for you 0.99
01:05:00.700 because she loves and adores you and is sexually attracted to you. But when it comes to negotiating,
01:05:06.300 like, give me money for this transaction, then it becomes transactional. It's not authentic.
01:05:11.160 Very, very transactional. And it, you know, a lot of guys say that, oh, well, you know,
01:05:16.420 I get laid anyway, but I think it's very bad for your self-esteem. I, you know, like I said,
01:05:21.100 I try everything. I've tried everything. I've even tried paying for a prostitute. I tried it twice
01:05:25.280 in my life. And the first time I felt a little bad, like, I feel like, okay, so why other guys,
01:05:31.000 why do other guys get it for free? But why do I have to pay for it? That's, that's the first,
01:05:34.140 that's the first thought that crept into my mind. The second thing is that I just feel that
01:05:38.320 I'm literally bribing her just to like me. So if I didn't bribe her, she wouldn't even take a second 0.88
01:05:44.880 look at me. Yeah. She wouldn't even look my way. And the third thing was that she was so mechanical 0.97
01:05:51.280 and, and like, you know, almost clinical, like, like in, it's like, she's doing a medical procedure.
01:05:56.920 This is no love. There's no passion. There's nothing. It's transactional.
01:06:00.080 It's very, very, very transactional. And any guy who says that, oh, it's the same thing. No,
01:06:04.660 it's not the same thing. It's the furthest thing from the same thing. Obviously, if you don't have,
01:06:12.260 I mean, I don't, some incels will say that, you know, well, I've tried my best the regular way,
01:06:19.140 and I'm not genetically blessed, like most guys to get it for free. I guess the only option I have left
01:06:26.320 is to pay for it. I mean, if, if, if you're in that situation, you know, I'm not going to act
01:06:31.600 all high and mighty and say that you shouldn't do it, but this is something that you should avoid as
01:06:36.060 best as you can, because it does not feel good. It does not feel good to pay a chick. And then 1.00
01:06:41.300 after that, you know, it just craters your self-esteem. It's like, oh my God, you know,
01:06:45.080 what am I doing with my life? You know, it's like my heart and money, and I'm just tossing it to some
01:06:50.100 chick who hates me. And she's only doing it because rent is due next month. And you know, 0.98
01:06:56.200 you, there's so many rules, or you got to put on a condom, you can't kiss me, you can't touch me 0.88
01:07:01.000 here, you can't touch me there. That is something I do not recommend for guys, unless you have
01:07:07.100 absolutely no choice whatsoever. Yeah, which is the opposite of what you've managed to accomplish with
01:07:12.900 total opposite, total opposite. Yeah, hookups are probably the best. I would say hookups are probably
01:07:18.880 the best because you are not bribing her, not even with dinner or drinks. Like she's literally
01:07:23.900 showing up because she likes you as a person, or she's attracted to you as a person. And that means
01:07:29.300 a lot. That is pretty rare in, in the modern world. Yeah. I think I heard you say that you can't vet
01:07:36.540 women. So I have a chapter on 21 red flags. I'm sure that you're aware because I, because it shows up
01:07:41.520 as an auto reply on, on, on Twitter X. Yes. Um, explain that view on an inability to vet women. 0.73
01:07:49.860 Right. Okay. So when I said you can't wet, when you can't, when I say you can't vet women, 1.00
01:07:54.480 it's for marriage because marriage is permanent. And second of all, uh, women behave very differently 1.00
01:08:01.480 before they have locked you down by a marriage. And, and you think that, you know, the real her,
01:08:08.200 um, you're watching her, you're, you're observing her before marriage, but you know, women are very, 1.00
01:08:13.960 very good at pretending, but once they get what they have or what they want, then, you know,
01:08:18.580 they start getting fat. They start nagging at you. They start making life very, very difficult for you.
01:08:23.420 And a lot of these guys too, they don't do like a trial marriage thing, like where they live with the
01:08:27.500 chick for a while for like a year or two to see what she's like in that environment. You know, 0.57
01:08:32.500 you don't even have to marry her to see, well, for the most part, you don't have to marry her for her
01:08:36.820 to see how she would behave, uh, as a wife. You just have to live with her for, um, a couple of 1.00
01:08:42.260 years, maybe, maybe a year, a year max is sufficient for you to see all her flaws. And I always tell guys,
01:08:48.060 you know, live with her for a year first, or you can propose to her and then propose that you guys
01:08:53.160 move in together. Don't actually sign any papers yet because proposals just, you know,
01:08:57.380 it's just a formality. Uh, it's just unofficial. Um, but it, it gives her that, that dopamine hit
01:09:05.320 that she has already locked you down. You get what I mean? So the engagement is a great thing for men,
01:09:10.700 as long as you don't follow through and, and do the, the full marriage thing. So try to live with
01:09:16.140 her, observe her over a year. And, um, that is probably much better vetting than you can do than
01:09:23.740 simply just, you know, looking at her right now, because when you get married with a chick and you
01:09:28.520 move in with her for the first time, you're combining two things. You're combining the fact
01:09:32.700 that you're living with her for the first time. So you're seeing all her bad habits. And the second
01:09:36.180 thing is you're, you're also combining this new dynamic of her all of a sudden having legal leverage 1.00
01:09:42.580 over you. So we don't know how people will behave if they have power and wealth. We just don't know.
01:09:48.920 We think we know, but it's like, you know, it's like trying to predict how your friend or your
01:09:55.180 best friend is going to behave. Um, if they suddenly won $10 million in the lottery, we have
01:10:00.280 no idea. You know, they might totally just wash their hands clean of you and pretend they don't
01:10:05.060 know you, or they might take you along for the right. You really don't know. I mean, and they're
01:10:08.920 your best friend. You're supposed to know them well, but you really don't know. So that's why I say
01:10:12.840 you can't vet them because, um, the conditions under which you are vetting them or, or, or
01:10:18.100 observing them are very, very different from the conditions after marriage where you have
01:10:22.180 totally given up your legal leverage. And she knows that you can't leave her anymore without
01:10:27.220 paying a hefty financial penalty. And that's why I say you can't vet for marriage as for, uh, 0.63
01:10:32.440 relationships and such. You can vet because she knows that you still hold some leverage, which
01:10:37.240 is you can leave her if her behavior ever gets, um, out of control. So she knows that
01:10:43.320 she can behave in a certain way to the extent of not fully driving you away. Uh, but she 1.00
01:10:49.540 does know that you can leave in a relationship. That's why women are all, you know, fixated 1.00
01:10:54.340 on marriage because they know that once they get married, they can do whatever the hell
01:10:57.640 they want. Yeah. I wish the guys in the, the 500 level would pay attention to that and
01:11:02.900 hear it, but they never seem to accept that message. Um, it sounds like you've traveled
01:11:08.460 around a lot and you've lived in a lot of different places. What's your view on America
01:11:12.460 now that you live there? Like, is it what you thought it would be? Is it better? Is it
01:11:16.220 worse? I'm curious. Um, you, you really have to live abroad to, to experience different systems
01:11:24.120 all over the world. And you, you see the pros and cons of America very quickly. Um, once
01:11:29.060 you do that, um, good things about a good thing in America is that, for example, it
01:11:34.100 sounds cliche, but freedom, freedom is a real thing. For example, uh, not just freedom
01:11:38.420 of speech, you know, you get people, people are being arrested in my country, for example,
01:11:42.500 um, in most parts of Europe for posting stuff online. So that still hasn't happened in America.
01:11:49.660 I'm not sure if it has happened in Canada yet, but it hasn't happened in America, but it
01:11:53.300 happens a lot in the UK, for example, in UK and France. Yeah. We've seen lots of examples
01:11:58.120 of that. Yeah. There's, there's, there's certain things you can't say in other countries,
01:12:02.520 but in America you have freedom of speech. Uh, second thing is Americans, you know, they 0.91
01:12:08.220 are very divided in the way that at least if there's some kind of crazy policy that that's
01:12:13.840 being proposed, at least, at least 50% of the population is going to be up in arms about
01:12:19.040 it. For example, a few years ago, we had the whole COVID thing with the whole vaccines and
01:12:23.400 the mask thing. Um, you know, I actually felt pretty proud that I was living in a country
01:12:28.560 where at least 50% of the population fought back against it because in other countries,
01:12:32.300 they just fought, they just followed it. You know, they just followed it in Asia and Europe.
01:12:35.940 They're like, Oh, it's just for our health. We have to keep, you know, we have to keep grandma
01:12:39.740 safe or whatever it is. And, uh, and they just comply. And, and that's not good because if
01:12:44.980 you have a, you have a population that just complies to these crazy ass policies, the government 0.81
01:12:49.600 is just going to keep pushing the boundary to see what they can get away with. They're 0.96
01:12:53.300 going to keep creeping on your personal liberties, uh, liberties until you have none left. And
01:12:58.220 thankfully in America, we have a population or at least part of the population who would
01:13:02.680 actually, you know, racist think about it. And that's a good thing. Uh, in Canada too,
01:13:07.040 for example, we have the whole truckers, uh, um, protesting the vaccine thing. Um, and that,
01:13:13.340 and that was great. That was great because that didn't happen in a lot of other countries
01:13:16.420 where they forced the vaccines on. It was necessary because we had like lockdowns,
01:13:23.220 like hard lockdowns when most of American States were free and open. There was no mass,
01:13:28.840 there was no mandates, there was no travel vaccine to get on flights or anything like
01:13:32.180 that. But we still had, you had to prove proof of vaccination to fly, take a train. Uh, when
01:13:38.500 you went into a restaurant, you had to wear a mask to walk to your table, but then you can
01:13:42.100 take a mask when you sat, take it off when you sat. That was just bonkers to me. It's like COVID
01:13:46.280 was up here, but it wasn't down here where you were sitting. Right. And it's like, the
01:13:51.060 truckers are just like, you want to shove vaccination down our throat when 99.9% of 1.00
01:13:56.600 the time we're by ourselves in a truck and they just lost their shit and they went up 1.00
01:13:59.640 to Ottawa and they protested. Right. And that was great. And that was very unusual for Canadians 0.99
01:14:03.740 to actually behave that way. They, they all bent over for a very, like I was getting pissed
01:14:08.780 off. Like I was at the point where I was just like, I, I got to get out of here. Like
01:14:11.860 I can't stay here. Um, yeah. The thing is they, they, they also, they also, um, I heard
01:14:19.680 that they got their bank accounts frozen and all, all the other truckers had their bank
01:14:23.000 accounts frozen, their insurance canceled. People that donated money to the truckers up
01:14:26.600 in Ottawa, um, had their bank accounts frozen and issues with the government too. Yep. So
01:14:30.720 that was, that was pretty draconian. And I don't think that it would have happened here
01:14:35.240 in America. No, it didn't. It didn't like not even close. That's my point. That's my
01:14:39.260 point. A lot of Americans take for granted like the freedoms and, and that was even
01:14:43.600 with the democratic government too, wasn't it? Cause I think Joe Biden was president
01:14:46.960 when COVID was really in the world. Yes, Biden was president. But even then, even then it's
01:14:51.000 just the whole American culture of freedom and liberty, uh, that you can just, that you
01:14:55.580 can't just trample over. So that's very, very valuable in America. Are you, are you bullish
01:15:00.920 on America in the future or are you bearish on the States? Well, I mean, it depends
01:15:05.760 for what, if you're talking about, uh, tech, uh, the economy. Sure. Sure. I would say America
01:15:13.640 is keeping up, um, as a place to live. I don't think so. So it really depends. You
01:15:19.880 mean on what the culture? I don't think so. Do I think that the, uh, the feminism crap 1.00
01:15:25.480 is going to go away anytime soon? I don't think so. But I think that Gen Z men are actually 0.99
01:15:31.100 doing a good job at, at pushing back. I think Gen Z men are the least romantic, least 1.00
01:15:36.380 idealistic, most like for lack of a better word, based, um, generation of men. So I
01:15:43.920 think there is some hope right there. You know, they're, they're probably the least
01:15:48.220 likely to get married. They're probably the least likely to, to cohabitate with a 0.99
01:15:51.840 chick. Um, and they're probably the least likely to, uh, that generation, like that 1.00
01:15:57.000 genre that you're describing, they seem to sort of follow into like the
01:16:00.200 grow up or crowd for like the Nick Fuentes follow. Right, right, right, right. I
01:16:05.180 don't think they have the optionality that they'd like, like opting out is fine, but
01:16:09.980 opting out when you have the optionality to opt in is a totally different story.
01:16:13.580 And I don't know the optionality to opt in exists for them. I'm not entirely sure
01:16:17.460 at this point. You mentioned that, um, you would see somewhere else is a better
01:16:22.560 place to live. Like where would you put above the States?
01:16:25.800 Well, first of all, it's very subjective. Uh, I know there are a lot of guys who say
01:16:31.560 that they're having the time of their lives in, in Columbia, in Thailand, in, uh, for
01:16:38.280 example, the Philippines, in Brazil. Um, it really depends what you're looking for.
01:16:43.680 You know, if you're, if you're, you know, I actually think that the, the American
01:16:47.860 suburbs, like the smaller towns, the small cities is still not a bad place to raise a
01:16:51.640 family in America, but then again, you have Western family law. So you want to try to
01:16:56.100 get away from that if you can. Um, if you're a young guy and you're just trying to like
01:17:01.000 meet women, have fun, you know, Thailand is great. Um, most parts of Europe are pretty
01:17:09.620 good. Um, you know, a lot of it is not, not really the country it's, it's, you know, if
01:17:15.340 you have a source of a remote source of income and you can make it anywhere, then really
01:17:20.700 anywhere in the world is your playground. Um, that's very subjective. It really depends
01:17:25.720 what you value. Let me just throw this, uh, prenup comment up here. Cause it says a prenup
01:17:31.760 should be mandatory before you marry a woman, but it's like, I don't think guys understand
01:17:35.640 that a prenup, like the best of prenups going to do for you is if it holds up, if you get 0.99
01:17:41.720 divorced, you're not going to have to give up half your shit. You're still going to have 1.00
01:17:44.760 to pay the legal bills. You're still going to have to fight. There's still going to be
01:17:47.200 custody issues. You're probably going to have to, uh, pay, uh, uh, child support in
01:17:52.300 excess of what the child needs monthly. She's probably going to try to alienate you from 0.99
01:17:55.560 the kids. Like prenups don't solve any of those problems. Um, there's still that fight
01:18:01.480 that happens, which I don't think should exist at all.
01:18:04.860 You know, I'm anti-prenups because first of all, they fail. So it's not a, it's not a
01:18:10.340 hundred percent thing. Second of the, second of all, it just reflects the mindset of the
01:18:13.720 person. It's like the person is trying their hardest to justify marriage. Why are
01:18:17.460 you trying to justify marriage? Like I always say, it's, it's like putting on a
01:18:20.840 bulletproof vest and then shooting yourself in the chest. You know what I mean? Okay. 0.61
01:18:24.380 Like, so, okay. So you're taking precaution, but you're better off just not
01:18:27.740 shooting yourself in the chest in the first place. Right. So why are these guys
01:18:30.860 trying to cope with like, Oh, you know, you, you, you got to have a prenup. You got to
01:18:34.500 put your assets in your mom's name, or you gotta, you gotta set up these, these
01:18:38.100 overseas offshore trusts. You got to have this irrevocable trust, this LLC, you know,
01:18:43.360 you got to obfuscate everything. I'm like, or you can just not get married in
01:18:47.420 the first place. You know, a lot of these guys trying to cope with all these
01:18:50.740 like legal fancy tricks. It's because they don't want to lose marriage as a 0.97
01:18:55.460 sexual strategy. I keep trying to tell them like marriage is a shitty sexual 0.99
01:18:59.840 strategy. Don't use it as a sexual strategy. I mean, like you're trying to 0.99
01:19:03.580 cling onto it so hard is it's because you don't have anything else. Maybe you
01:19:07.320 should increase your SMB. Maybe that's, you know, that's a lot better than just,
01:19:11.420 you know, trying. What do you think that is? Do you think it's like a religious
01:19:13.820 thing, a cultural thing? I think it's a, it's a cultural thing. A lot of these
01:19:18.420 guys can't bear, or they don't know how to answer their friends and family when
01:19:22.680 being asked, like, for example, at 30 or 35, like, Oh, when are you getting
01:19:26.560 married? Oh, you know, uh, aren't you getting hitched anytime soon? You know,
01:19:30.260 they don't know how to answer. They don't know how to deal with it. And, and they
01:19:33.700 just want to want badly to get married and they don't know how to do it
01:19:38.660 safely because there's no way to do it safely. You know, the, the whole system
01:19:42.420 is, it's, it's bulletproof. It's hard. You know, I mean, like bottom line, you
01:19:46.720 can just tell people to mind their own fucking business and it's, yeah, yeah, 0.99
01:19:49.240 yeah. But you know, they don't have the balls to do that. That's the thing. If 1.00
01:19:52.000 they have the balls to do that, they, they wouldn't be in this situation in the 0.99
01:19:54.640 first place. So when they always say that prenups are mandatory, I'm like, you 0.98
01:19:58.500 know, don't count on it. Um, it gives you a false sense of security, allows you
01:20:03.660 into a false sense of security. You think with a prenup, you can do anything. And then,
01:20:07.720 you know, a lot of these celebrities have prenups and then when they get to
01:20:10.760 family court, they realize, Oh, you know what? These prenups aren't worth the
01:20:13.700 paper they're printed on. And, and a lot of these prenups increasingly, they're
01:20:18.440 being challenged in court. They're bringing, um, they're not being honored by
01:20:21.500 court because these, these family courts, they want you to get divorced. They 1.00
01:20:24.620 want you to pay a lot of money to your wife. Um, I know, I know they, they get, 0.94
01:20:28.120 they, they get a cut of it, of child support and alimony in America. I'm not sure
01:20:32.340 about Canada and other places, but they do have a financial stake in it. So, um,
01:20:37.480 Well, family law is the most profitable area of legal practice for lawyers, right?
01:20:42.300 Yes.
01:20:42.700 They make more money practicing family law, especially in private practice. I mean,
01:20:46.560 you could be a corporate lawyer for Tesla, you know, I suppose maybe make more
01:20:49.560 money, but most private lawyers that practice family law make the most money.
01:20:54.320 Yep. And the thing about family law, I don't like is that it only enforces the
01:20:58.440 male obligation. It has never, ever enforced.
01:21:01.440 Yeah. Isn't that interesting that.
01:21:02.760 Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's, that's just, that's just not like, they don't enforce
01:21:05.420 her to keep banging you, but you have to keep paying her. 1.00
01:21:07.880 Yeah. No, you know, first of all, okay. When you get divorced, they'll say, okay, 0.80
01:21:10.460 for the next five years, you got to pay her, you know, what? $5,000 a month for,
01:21:14.560 for example, it, it never ever says like for the next five years, she has to suck 1.00
01:21:18.080 your dick three times a week, you know, you never ever get anything like that. 0.99
01:21:21.180 So I'm like, why would, you know, guys keep signing up for this thing, you know, 0.99
01:21:24.820 where it's obviously one-sided and all she has all the rights, she has zero 0.71
01:21:27.880 responsibilities. Like what is even the point? You know, if you can't get the
01:21:32.700 chick's attention or her commitment or her companionship without marriage, then 0.86
01:21:37.020 trust me, it's not worth, you know, it's not worth marrying her for.
01:21:41.000 Because a woman will forego her sexual strategy and marriage if she actually 1.00
01:21:47.040 likes you enough.
01:21:48.280 Absolutely.
01:21:49.140 You know, she'll drop it. She'll let it go. She'll be like, fine, we don't have to
01:21:52.300 do that. Or, you know, you can offer an alternative, like, you know, maybe
01:21:56.700 something we look at later on down the road in the world, in a country that's
01:21:59.540 not as hostile, you know, towards fathers and men as this country is, you know,
01:22:03.680 there's different ways that you can handle it, but you will find that women 1.00
01:22:07.320 will drop it if she sees you as her best hypergamous option. That's just 1.00
01:22:12.520 absolutely. I mean, I wouldn't say they'll fully drop it. They'll probably
01:22:15.760 complain about it in private or complain about on the internet or to their
01:22:19.580 friends. But, but the problem is, is when we get a lot of pressure by their
01:22:22.600 family and friends too, right? It's like, you know, why won't he marry you?
01:22:25.500 Like what's wrong with them? Like, why don't you just have these friends
01:22:29.240 around them and they're like, you know, yeah, that's why I always say nobody
01:22:32.120 hates women more than other women. They feed them that dumb shit. 1.00
01:22:35.400 Yeah. Yeah. They'll, you know, people should just mind their own business, but 1.00
01:22:38.060 that's not how it works. And girls are very susceptible to friends and family 1.00
01:22:41.220 as well. You know, all that chatter about like, Oh, he's using you. Oh, he's
01:22:44.480 leading you on, you know, he's playing you and all that. Uh, so it takes a, you
01:22:48.520 know, ideally if you have, if you find a girl, you know, try to find a girl
01:22:51.560 without that many friends, I guess, you know, because the more friends she
01:22:55.660 has, the more she feels that she has to account to them, the more she feels
01:22:59.360 that, um, she has to conform to what they're all doing as well.
01:23:03.420 Yeah. It's like they have a council that they, that they run everything by.
01:23:07.360 It's like, I have this important thing in my life.
01:23:08.540 Because girls have one of their own, you know, they sit down, they crack open a 1.00
01:23:12.480 box of wine and they pet their cats and they, and they make decisions, you know,
01:23:16.260 collectively. Everything is, is, is, is by committee and, uh, you know, if you
01:23:22.460 want to do something with her, you know, it has to be, it has to get the
01:23:26.940 seals of approval of all her friends and family. And it's, it's, it's just so
01:23:30.260 tiring. Yeah. Yeah. It's just, it's just not worth it. So if he's better off to
01:23:35.020 find a girl without many friends in the first place, you know, I mean, you know,
01:23:39.620 just do what you're going to do anyway. I mean, if you're, if you're successful,
01:23:42.920 competent, hands full, handsome, uh, you know, valuable, you can make it rain.
01:23:48.880 You know how to make money. You can solve problems. You got a good social network,
01:23:52.000 blah, blah, blah, all that stuff. Just do what you're going to fucking do anyway. 0.99
01:23:55.680 And she's either going to come along for the ride and be okay with it or she's 0.99
01:23:59.080 not. And you have to be okay. If she's not just, just let her go and just
01:24:02.500 fucking replace her. Because if she thinks that she can, the problem is, is most 0.99
01:24:06.340 women don't do better, right? Like once they get up around the top sort of thing, 1.00
01:24:09.980 like close to the top shelf, they find a guy and then they try to fuck with his 0.92
01:24:13.600 life and like manipulate it or make him do things that, you know, he's not doing 0.97
01:24:17.760 or make him stop doing things that she wants him to stop doing. And a lot of
01:24:21.040 dorky guys would just be like, well, you know, okay, because I love you and I'll 0.74
01:24:23.580 make some concession. It's like every time you make these, you know, these little 0.91
01:24:26.840 tiny concessions for, she actually ends up resenting you and punishing you over 1.00
01:24:31.960 time. But most guys don't see it until after the fact, until they listen to
01:24:36.140 podcasts like this, or they read like, you know, books that I've written and, you
01:24:39.780 know, stuff like that. And it's like, it's, it's not that complex, right? Like
01:24:43.400 if you really see women for who they are, not what you want them to be, which 0.99
01:24:49.760 is what most people have this fucking illusion in their head about, you know, 0.98
01:24:52.540 the sugar and spice and all things nice. Yeah. Go sit in family court for an 0.99
01:24:55.780 afternoon. And you tell me if women are sugar and spice and all things nice, 1.00
01:24:58.820 but these guys, they just don't understand, man. They just don't understand.
01:25:02.720 No, the thing about women is that it's very counterintuitive. Like what we've, what 1.00
01:25:06.460 we're being taught about women, whether directly or indirectly in the movies and
01:25:10.580 in pop culture is, it's very different from how women actually operate and in 1.00
01:25:15.860 the real world. That's why it's very confusing for these men. And, um, the thing
01:25:21.800 is that with women, the less you do what they want you to do, the more they like 1.00
01:25:26.700 you. It's very counterintuitive. And most guys don't understand this for a
01:25:31.460 while. Yeah. And if you understand this, then you will know that, um, you will know
01:25:37.940 that it's actually a win-win thing. You can actually do less shit and she will 0.99
01:25:41.500 even like you more. Yeah. You know, if you, if you do what she wants, first of all, 1.00
01:25:45.320 it takes time, effort and money, and then she'll like you even less. It's a loose,
01:25:49.160 loose situation. So why would you do it? But, uh, you know, a lot of guys don't know
01:25:52.740 this. How do you, how do you balance what you give women in your life over a long-term
01:25:57.840 basis so that it's not giving them too much of doing what they want, but you
01:26:01.760 give them enough that it keeps them in your frame?
01:26:06.440 Well, I mean, right, right, right. We like to act all hard and alpha all the time,
01:26:11.620 but when it comes down to it, you want to retain a woman over the longer term, you
01:26:15.440 have to give some concessions. Um, just give me like a couple of like seconds. I
01:26:21.540 need to get the, uh, the plug from my laptop cause running low on battery.
01:26:24.260 Yeah. Yeah. That's okay. Yeah. That's fine. Yeah. I'll, I'll,
01:26:27.840 you know, I'll just sort of, uh, soapbox it for a little bit while he gets his, uh, AC
01:26:31.900 cord. Um, so yeah, you will have to give women some stuff and you will have to placate 1.00
01:26:40.840 some of their, uh, itches. But I mean, like at the end of the day, guys, you know, I keep
01:26:45.720 telling you this is if you are on the top shelf, you can give her less of what she
01:26:50.140 wants and more of, and give yourself more of what you want. And she's not always going
01:26:55.360 to like it. She might protest over it, but she's still there. Right. It's not
01:27:00.220 like you're doing anything to hurt her. You're not harming her. You're not putting
01:27:03.060 her health at risk. You're not doing anything physically like, you know, to harm
01:27:07.120 her or anything. You're, you're the man you're supposed to leave your lead. You're
01:27:11.640 supposed to be in the driver's seat. You're supposed to fucking make the 0.99
01:27:13.900 decisions. Women don't make very good decisions. You're the one that needs to make 1.00
01:27:17.300 the decisions, right? It's, it's fathers and older brothers historically that have,
01:27:21.220 that have led, you know, the sisters and daughters and daughters in their lives. 0.99
01:27:25.600 And when you leave a woman to her own fucking devices, like this chick, this Ukrainian 1.00
01:27:30.360 chick, you know, recently that was on the bus that sat in front of that, you know, career 1.00
01:27:33.880 criminal, right? Nobody told her, don't sit in front of somebody that looks like a career
01:27:37.520 criminal, right? She just did it because that's what women do. They just like drink the Kool-Aid 1.00
01:27:42.060 of like liberal, uh, nonsense, just accept everything. Black lives matter, blah, blah, blah. 0.99
01:27:47.260 They don't like, you have to lead them. Like you have to be able to say no to them. Sorry
01:27:50.800 to interrupt. Cause I just kind of went off a rant over there when you got your plug,
01:27:53.340 but go ahead. Yeah. Yeah. No, the thing about concessions is that you have to have hard rules
01:27:57.520 for yourself. So there, you have to know in your mind what you're never, ever conceding
01:28:01.340 no matter what. So for me, it's stuff like marriage, cohabitation, um, combining finances,
01:28:07.940 stuff like that. That's never going to happen. So everything else I'm open to making it
01:28:13.800 happen for her. For example, um, um, so I have a longer term girlfriend right now and
01:28:19.500 she is, she likes to travel and a lot of guys think that, oh, traveling is gay, traveling
01:28:24.880 is feminine, whatever. Um, I make it happen for her because, you know, she makes a lot of 1.00
01:28:28.780 things happen for me and, um, it's, it's a give and take, you know, I can reward good
01:28:33.280 behavior. Right, right. I reward good behavior. Exactly. So, um, give me a second. Yeah, go
01:28:42.020 ahead. So you have to know what you are able to concede. So for example, another example
01:28:51.640 would be, um, you can provide for her. I don't think that is, uh, wrong or, or forbidden
01:28:58.560 per se. You just don't want to provide for her like in a legal sense, like under a marriage. 0.80
01:29:05.120 So if you want to, I guess if, if you want to make life easier for her, you, she, you want
01:29:10.100 her to be your, your stay at home, whatever. Um, or you, you know, you can make life easier
01:29:15.240 for her. That's okay because that's conditional and you can cut that off at any time. Um, so
01:29:20.020 it really depends, you know, some, for, for some guys, another concession would be like
01:29:24.220 they would act as their husbands when they go meet her friends and family so that, you
01:29:30.000 know, you can help her to save face. You can give her what she wants without actually
01:29:34.620 giving her what she wants. You can give a part of what she wants. So, you know, you,
01:29:38.460 you become her husband, you know, play husband, um, uh, with her friends and family. Nobody
01:29:44.040 really needs to know whether you actually have signed a marital, uh, certificate or
01:29:48.680 not in the background. Yeah. They don't need to know the details. Yeah. They don't need
01:29:51.520 to know the details, but, but, you know, you just got to be careful. You're okay with
01:29:55.060 going to it. So you, you know, you put on your best outfit and you show up and you rub
01:29:59.160 elbows, right? Yep. I mean, so if you want to retain her over the longterm, I mean, I would
01:30:05.460 think that some concessions are necessary. It's like any other relationship, you know,
01:30:09.720 if, if nobody's, if, if the person's not getting anything out of the relationship,
01:30:14.260 they'll probably, you know, disappear sooner or later, no matter how much they like you
01:30:18.380 initially. So all the relationships out there are some exchange of value. Women usually exchange 1.00
01:30:23.940 some form of sexual opportunity or like, you know, respect, or they do something useful
01:30:29.860 in your life. Guys usually provide, you know, travel like, you know, for example, like travel
01:30:35.320 is a great example, right? Like if I travel somewhere and I bring in my check, it's, it's
01:30:39.920 first class, the cocoon, I pay for the ticket sort of thing. Um, you know, if she's behaving
01:30:45.340 good, obviously, but, um, yeah, that's how you can give her some of what she wants, but
01:30:49.920 you can't give her everything. Like if you give a woman everything that she wants, you're 1.00
01:30:53.160 fucked. You know, you really are. Especially not, not when it comes to the heart rules, 1.00
01:30:57.400 like, like marriage cohabitation, that kind of stuff. You can have, you can let her have 0.76
01:31:01.620 everything else or, or most of the things else. Uh, but, but the heart things, um, you
01:31:07.200 don't want to be part, to be subject to the jurisdiction of family court, basically.
01:31:12.280 Yeah. Yeah. That's, it's really interesting that you mentioned that. Cause I was listening
01:31:15.500 to you talk about that a couple of minutes ago and I was thinking about a wild case in
01:31:20.060 Canada that, that went super public. I don't know if you ever heard about it, but one of
01:31:23.500 Canada's richest families, I can't remember the guy's name for the life of me right now,
01:31:27.100 but he's like in the top 20 billionaires in Canada. This guy was dating, he's like 50
01:31:31.540 something. You know, he was dating this 40 something year old, you know, single mom.
01:31:34.760 They were both divorced. They never lived together. Um, they would travel a lot together. He would
01:31:40.200 take her up to Muskoka, up to his lighthouse. He would take her down to Miami. Um, they would
01:31:44.460 take a lot of photographs together. They would have dinner together, um, you know, with their
01:31:49.080 kids. Um, and they traveled and they acted that way for a couple of years and she ended up
01:31:54.180 getting him for alimony for 50 grand a month, even though they never got married, even though
01:31:58.980 they never lived together because she was able to prove to the judge that he acted like her
01:32:05.560 husband because he paid for so much travel. Like they would go down to Mexico or some shit. 0.96
01:32:11.300 And then there would be a picture on Facebook that she would show with like, I don't know, 0.98
01:32:14.860 like, you know, Jay and Nancy or something like that with a big heart in the sand or something
01:32:18.200 like that. And he gave her a promise ring to like, that was the other, other really big mistake
01:32:22.500 that he, uh, did was he gave her a fucking ring. Um, and yeah, she won that case, man, 0.98
01:32:27.880 50 grand for like 20 years monthly. Yeah. Yeah. I saw the case. And, um, that's the thing
01:32:32.840 about Canada. It's, it's so dangerous when you, you know, when, when you risk being legally
01:32:41.080 married without actually being legally married. Right. And I don't know what the solution is.
01:32:48.440 Uh, maybe move out of Canada, maybe, um, at least in America, we know which states are
01:32:52.780 common law and which late, which states are not common law. And I think the vast majority
01:32:56.580 of states are not common law. For example, California is not common law. Uh, Texas is
01:33:01.540 though. So, you know, you, you gotta, even if it wasn't a common law state, there's, I still
01:33:06.360 don't see any advantage to living with a chick. If you want GBD out of her over the longterm. 1.00
01:33:12.360 Absolutely. Like regardless of the law, uh, if you want to, if you want to keep her interest
01:33:18.160 in you high, um, you shouldn't be living with her. She shouldn't have like, you know,
01:33:23.580 she shouldn't know what you're doing all the time. You know, the moment she knows what 0.62
01:33:26.940 you're up to all the time. Uh, that's when the attraction, the mystery drops. Um, and
01:33:32.620 you know, it becomes a chore. It becomes a chore. So do you, do you find with this LTR
01:33:36.840 that you have that you become less interested in other women over time when she's treating
01:33:42.000 you really well, she's respectful, she's useful in your life, or do you still find yourself
01:33:46.420 craving a lot of women on the side? No, no, no. Do you minimize it? Well, first of all,
01:33:52.080 we're, we're not exclusive. So, um, but is she exclusive to you or? I don't know. Like
01:33:59.400 I say, I can't mate guard. Um, there's no rule whatsoever. Um, I think she is. I don't 0.51
01:34:06.040 know. It doesn't matter to you. It's not something that crosses your mind. It doesn't really matter
01:34:09.360 because if, if, if I feel that she's not doing it for me anymore, I just cut her off and I
01:34:13.940 just move on with my life. You know, what's so difficult, you know, most guys are ways
01:34:17.560 are like so invested in this. Like I think of her as like a FWB, but a longterm FWB, if
01:34:25.220 that makes sense. And right. But I'm not, I got a conversation with another friend of
01:34:30.180 mine about this. He's like, yeah, I got a longterm plate. Like, what does that mean?
01:34:33.980 He goes, you know, we fucked up. You know, part of it is just guys. These guys are just 0.98
01:34:40.300 too prideful to admit that they have a girlfriend because that's a very loaded term. You know,
01:34:46.520 everyone thinks that you're whipped. Everyone thinks that you're a beta. If you admit that
01:34:50.420 you have a girlfriend, but you know, I'm not above using that term. I'll just use the term,
01:34:54.440 you know, girlfriend, but, um, you know, nobody really knows the dynamics between us. That's
01:34:58.400 between me and her. Um, but I mean, like the question I asked you was, do you find yourself
01:35:02.440 less interested in exploring and enjoying variety when things are going really well with her?
01:35:10.680 Even when things are going really well? No, no, no. First of all, um, um, we have an
01:35:18.120 quote unquote open bedroom. So we're swingers and we do stuff. So we're not exactly, um, exclusive.
01:35:27.720 I don't know if she does stuff on her own time. That's her own problem. I don't really care.
01:35:32.440 Um, if she says that she has my baby, the first thing I'll say is, you know, we have to get a 0.99
01:35:37.520 paternity test right now because I'm not paying you a single cent for anything unless I'm a hundred
01:35:42.640 percent certain that it's my child. And that's another thing that I find that guys are so
01:35:47.160 too trusting, um, with women about, you know, just because she's your girlfriend or she's your wife.
01:35:53.840 What do you think the rates of paternity fraud are?
01:35:56.060 I don't know. Um, what I do know is that, uh, one out of three tests come back, uh,
01:36:04.860 positive for fraud. So in the general rate, I'm not sure. It could be 3%, 5%. It could be as high
01:36:12.700 as 10%. I really don't know. Um, but that's not when tested. So when there's suspicion, one in three
01:36:18.800 confirms the suspicion is what you're saying. Yes. Yes. One out of three confirms the suspicion.
01:36:24.500 So that's not really that high. Uh, but we don't know how many people actually have suspicions
01:36:31.180 too. You know, like we don't know how often people run these tests, but what I do know personally,
01:36:37.980 if I, if anyone, if any chick comes up to me and says, you know what, I'm, I'm having your baby.
01:36:43.440 I'm like, okay, well let's do it. Yeah. And let's do another one to make sure too. Yeah.
01:36:49.460 Did you ever read sperm wars? Uh, I've heard of the book. Never personally read it yet.
01:36:55.640 I sent you a link to it a couple of months ago. Cause we chatted about it on X. I was just
01:37:00.000 wondering if you read it. Right, right. I, I was posting about another book, uh, back then.
01:37:05.280 Yeah. About why? Yeah. Uh, but I, you know, evil psych is very interesting. It probably explains like
01:37:11.860 most behaviors and women and men as well. Um, so yeah, yeah. You know, I, I really enjoy evil psych. 0.86
01:37:20.240 What do you think of this guy's comment? What's this? Yeah. Yo, no, thanks. Just discredited the
01:37:27.500 entire cast. These dudes have zero quality to offer women. No one. That's why I say, you know, 0.97
01:37:31.380 like certain things, you know, if you say it, you, you lose your credibility with a certain crowd. Um,
01:37:38.760 you know, I, I don't really care. I just live in my life. You know, um, I guess when you're having
01:37:44.640 me on, you, you know, that I'll probably say certain things that, you know, some of your audience.
01:37:49.420 Yeah. That's why I put you on, man. Cause I wanted to get your live take because your Twitter takes are
01:37:54.000 so good and accurate for the most part. Um, you know, there's very little that I've seen that you've
01:37:59.020 posted that I disagree with and it, and some of it, even, you know, I made a video once on one
01:38:04.780 piece of content that you referenced in my video. Um, I don't know if that drove any follows for you,
01:38:10.220 but yeah, like a lot of the shit that you've, that you've revealed, it's often very uncomfortable 0.95
01:38:15.080 for people. Like, you know, you see the guys in the comments are like, yeah, these guys don't know 0.97
01:38:18.200 what they're talking about. They have nothing to offer women, blah, blah, blah. Yet women are around us. 0.99
01:38:22.140 And it's like, I don't think you understand guys that women aren't who you think they are and what
01:38:28.840 you conventionally think that keeps women interested in you and retains them in your life. Um, in such
01:38:36.340 a way where you can enjoy it because a lot of guys have women in their life that their life just sucks. 1.00
01:38:40.720 Right. But it's such a way where you can enjoy your life and they're a benefit. Like they add some
01:38:45.480 value to your life. It's pretty rare. Like most guys aren't able to enjoy that.
01:38:49.320 Yeah. Uh, most, most guys is the other way around. Um, they are adding value to their
01:38:54.620 wife's life. She's getting the benefit. Exactly. Yeah. She's getting the benefit. Yeah. You were, 0.99
01:38:59.400 you were talking about humiliation rituals at one point, I think it was tied into marriage
01:39:04.020 or maybe dating. Can you explain what you meant by that? So, so I've, I've explained my dating
01:39:10.800 history of whatever you want to call it, my, my hookup history. Um, and I, I, I realized pretty
01:39:16.720 early in life that when a girl likes you, she will waive the interview. What a date is, is an HR
01:39:22.220 interview. And if they really like you, they will just waive the interview and they get down to it
01:39:27.100 right away. So the thing is that if she makes it a hard requirement that she has to interview you,
01:39:32.900 um, then the thing is that she doesn't really like you. She doesn't really like you that much.
01:39:38.840 But the thing is that most guys don't even know if she would waive the interview or not because
01:39:43.080 they never go for the kill. They never ask her to come over right away. If you don't ask her to come
01:39:46.660 over right away, how would you know if she would have waived the interview? So you ask her to come
01:39:51.700 over right away. If she says yes, great. If she doesn't say yes, then I mean, you know where you
01:39:57.400 stand. I mean, she has revealed her cards. She is either looking for a free meal, free drinks,
01:40:02.540 free validation, or she doesn't like you that much. And she wants to put you through this whole
01:40:07.400 gauntlet of hoops that she wants you to jump through to prove yourself to her. And that's
01:40:13.720 what's humiliating about it. What's humiliating about it is that she has different pricing models 1.00
01:40:19.180 for different men, like different men. Oh, for you, free. For you, oh, three dates first. You know,
01:40:23.400 for you, maybe 10 dates and maybe I'll give you a peck and a chick. You know what I mean? And that's 1.00
01:40:27.060 what's humiliating about it. It's that she has this price differentiation in her mind. Obviously, 0.97
01:40:32.120 women will never admit that, but it's true. It's like, it's like if you're at a shoe store 1.00
01:40:36.520 and you're queuing up for shoes and the guy in front of you gets shoes for free,
01:40:40.620 the other guy gets it for free too. Oh, the other guy gets like a 90% discount. And then
01:40:44.380 when it comes to your turn to pay, she said, oh, for you, it's $5,000. I mean, like, how
01:40:49.260 would you feel? I mean, when you know that the three person in front of you got it for
01:40:53.100 free or cheap, you know? So that's what's humiliating about it because you didn't, I guess,
01:40:59.360 make the cut to get the free offer.
01:41:02.080 Yeah. Like, I'm just wondering what, what percentage of women or, or how many women 0.99
01:41:07.360 lose out on an opportunity to be with a really solid dude that's got his life together because 0.91
01:41:14.340 they've been told by, I don't know, fucking, uh, sex in the city, their friends, some magazine 1.00
01:41:20.660 article they read in Cosmo that said, or read a book like why men love bitches or something like 1.00
01:41:26.480 that. You know, some other junk fucking, you know, book like that, where it tells them you got to do 1.00
01:41:30.560 this and you got to do this and you got to make them jump through that hoop and you can't sleep 0.99
01:41:33.320 right until the third or fourth date or don't do this until he buys you a handbag. Like there's
01:41:37.120 this entire genre of like luxury hoes online, like even on YouTube where they teach women how to 1.00
01:41:44.960 track shit for men before they give anything to them. Have you heard of the notion of like pay pigs? 0.99
01:41:50.680 Uh, I think I know what they are. 0.93
01:41:53.580 Pay pigs is wild, man. Somebody sent me this video the other day where this, where this girl was
01:41:57.320 explaining online how to lock down pay pigs. And basically it's these young girls that get guys 1.00
01:42:04.420 to give them money. They don't even sleep with them. They just extract financial resources out
01:42:10.600 of guys without giving them anything. That's kind of a very extreme example.
01:42:14.100 But what's in it for the guy?
01:42:15.460 Nothing except for giving them money and feeling quote unquote good about giving them money, which 0.88
01:42:20.160 is absolutely ridiculous. Like these guys are all simps, obviously. Like there's enough people that 0.95
01:42:24.560 are paying Sophie Rain $43 million a year. Like the entire NBA payroll is less than what Sophie
01:42:31.120 Rain made last year on OnlyFans. Like that's how many simps there are out there. And most of these
01:42:35.480 simps, by the way, they're all married. Like there's a lot of married guys out there that are simping
01:42:39.240 for women that will give them no sexual intimacy whatsoever. Breadcrumbs if they're lucky, but they 1.00
01:42:46.260 go and send financial resources to these checks.
01:42:48.400 I mean, those guys are, I mean, married guys are, are used to it, right? They're used to paying the
01:42:53.060 bills without getting much sex in return. 0.55
01:42:54.960 Yeah. They're used to it in the marriage. So it's like, you know, they just go for it. But
01:42:57.840 yeah, I was just like, how many women are losing out on the opportunity of, of actually going out 0.97
01:43:03.000 with a good guy that has his shit together because they want them to jump through hoops and guys like 0.95
01:43:07.820 you're just like, no. 0.98
01:43:08.460 Because if, if these girls have these hoops set up and they are, they have all these hard 1.00
01:43:12.740 rules, uh, you, you really only are going to filter in like the simpiest of simps, like
01:43:18.160 the lowest quality, um, you know, bottom of the barrel kind of guys. So I don't know if
01:43:24.560 they know what they're doing because they're not only missing out on top guys, they're missing
01:43:28.460 out on most guys period because most guys can, can sniff it when they're being, um, you know,
01:43:35.400 when they're being put through some kind of gauntlet of hoops and no, no guys likes to,
01:43:40.100 to, to have to earn more for something they gave away for free 20 minutes until a foam
01:43:45.840 can and especially information is online these days. It's easily accessible guys. Like I
01:43:52.300 said, I've, I said it recently that, that even the beta guys have lost all interest in
01:43:56.620 being quote unquote, the cleanup guys, because they see how these girls go out there and give 0.99
01:44:01.240 it for free to these men in their prime. And then once they're past their prime,
01:44:05.400 they charge an arm and a leg for whatever's left, like for sloppy seconds, sloppy thirds. 0.95
01:44:13.740 And a lot of these guys can't do it anymore. Like they could do it before when they didn't
01:44:18.980 know what was going on. But now that they've known, they, they know that everything is that's,
01:44:24.160 that's going on in the earlier part of her life, then they really don't want to, you know,
01:44:28.940 have anything to do with the later part of her life. And I, I'm, I think we are starting
01:44:33.320 to see this shift in society. Like you say, like, like the dating is a humiliation ritual
01:44:40.880 thing. It's not just a me thing. Like a lot of guys see it that way too, because they know
01:44:44.840 that the same, the very same goal that they're asking out on a proper date, she has definitely 0.99
01:44:49.000 gone over to a guy's house without a date and just fucked her. So why am I doing this whole 0.97
01:44:55.700 dating thing? And they know, they know, those guys know. So they, they've lost their motivation
01:45:01.340 to want to ask a girl out on a date. Yeah. That's why girls these days are complaining 1.00
01:45:05.320 online on TikTok about not, not having dinner dates, not being, you know, you got to take
01:45:10.800 me out on a proper date. That's the bare minimum. Why are you guys so low effort? I mean, like,
01:45:16.080 why do you think, you know, if it worked, we would have done it more. If it didn't work,
01:45:19.880 why would we keep doing it?
01:45:20.880 Yeah. My favorite is the women that go on TikTok and they, and they have a full like 1.00
01:45:24.840 three minute meltdown divulging every retarded choice they ever made. Plus all their bad 0.99
01:45:32.680 takes on everything. It's just, and they document it. It's like, it's, it's, it's so funny to
01:45:36.880 me because like the internet never forgets there's way back machines. You can go find these things
01:45:40.960 like at any point given, you know, given history, but there's a lot of these women that are like 1.00
01:45:44.880 documenting their stupid life choices when it comes to romance and men. And it's just 0.99
01:45:50.860 like, it's just like a stack of, of, of one dumb choice after the other. And they, 0.99
01:45:55.440 they don't listen. Like they don't want to hear it. The problem is, is that women don't listen. 1.00
01:45:58.780 I find anyway, until they're like definitely post wall, like late thirties, forties.
01:46:04.640 Sometimes even then they don't come to the acknowledgement. Like you've heard of the wall,
01:46:08.500 obviously, right? Yep. Yep. Yeah. So I have this theory that women hit the wall twice. So 1.00
01:46:12.600 they obviously hit it at like 22, 23 when their SMB starts to go on the decline,
01:46:16.820 universally accepted. There's really not a, not a lot of debate on it, but they don't
01:46:20.560 acknowledge that they're less valuable as time goes on. Usually until they come to the realization,
01:46:27.600 which is in their late thirties or forties. And they're like, Oh, I, at 43, I can't really
01:46:33.460 compete with the 23 year old anymore. Right. And it's, and it's a cry in shame because if
01:46:38.560 they understood that they could prioritize, uh, you leveraging their, their beauty and more of
01:46:48.940 their purity at a younger age, rather than wasting it, climbing corporate ladders, drinking, you know,
01:46:55.760 Kool-Aid on feminism and banging through, you know, the world as they travel sort of thing, 0.97
01:47:01.020 they could probably get a lot more of what they want, but they never want to hear it until it's too
01:47:04.600 late. Like when you're 43 and your eggs are all dried up and there's nothing else going on and
01:47:08.200 you got a degree and you've been through fucking, you know, 200 dicks or whatever. It's like, 0.99
01:47:12.920 you know, your list of demands needs to kind of relax a little bit, if you know what I'm saying.
01:47:17.340 Yep. But, um, you know, a lot of these chicks, uh, I guess they're, they're being taught that, 1.00
01:47:23.420 you know, you can't rely on a man that, you know, a man is going to leave you high and dry.
01:47:27.440 In most cases it's actually true, right? In most cases it's, it's, it's actually true. But if women 1.00
01:47:33.740 behave properly, I think men are more than willing to look after them. Sure, sure, sure. Um, but yeah,
01:47:43.240 you know, these women, they like to look at these outlier cases where, you know, they have a friend 1.00
01:47:49.260 who slept around, who had fun, but then later he found a husband and then they have kids as well.
01:47:53.980 So they want that. They want, you know, they want to fulfill both sides of their dual mating strategy 1.00
01:48:00.860 to the fullest. But most of the time they only got the alpha fucks part, but they, they don't have 0.99
01:48:05.340 the beta fucks part later on because they couldn't find a guy to marry because guys are getting smarter 1.00
01:48:10.380 too. Guys are not stupid, you know, guys see what's going on in the world. And, um, and like I say, 0.99
01:48:16.660 you know, guys just don't really want to do that anymore. I think, you know, guys are happy
01:48:21.700 with their hobbies, living alone and just dating casually the whole, um, you know, serious dating
01:48:28.800 thing, you know, you sign a document and all that. It's a lot of guys are afraid of it because,
01:48:34.060 you know, it's a generational thing too, because their parents, they see, they saw their uncles,
01:48:38.200 their older siblings, their older brothers, uh, get put through the ringer and they want to try
01:48:42.440 to avoid that. And I say, good for them. Good for them. You know, um, women should be denied 1.00
01:48:48.360 marriage as much as possible. If all of us band together and deny women marriage, I think 1.00
01:48:54.500 they will come to the table. No, not come to the table. They'll just naturally behave better.
01:48:59.640 Basically. That's yeah. That's like the, I don't know if it's an incel wet dream or a black pill sort
01:49:05.560 of wet dream. It's like, you know, if we collectively deny women what they're wanting them, then they'll,
01:49:12.100 then they'll come around and they'll behave. Yeah. But that's, you know, it's wishful thinking. It's not
01:49:15.660 going to happen, but we're just speaking as a hypothetical. Yeah. Yeah. Correct. Um, all
01:49:21.660 right. Well, thanks for your time, Jay. Let me just grab the super chat real quick before we wrap
01:49:24.760 up. Hey, Rich, how often you go to Tale of the Dragon in Maryville, Tennessee? Um, maybe once a
01:49:30.280 year or something like that. I might be down there again at the end of September. I'm not exactly sure,
01:49:33.800 but, um, yeah, it's a good time. Jay, um, shout out, where can everybody find you? Where, where do you
01:49:39.540 want them to, uh, check out your newsletter or whatever else you want? Uh, I would say, uh, join
01:49:44.760 my newsletter. I write a weekly newsletter at, uh, the, uh, address is there. It's zilvy.com,
01:49:49.520 the rail jaber join. Uh, definitely follow me on X, um, the rail jaber, um, on X. Yep. Yeah,
01:49:57.780 there you go. Um, check him out guys. He's definitely entertained me and we've engaged on a lot of
01:50:03.860 topics. Um, and you know, sometimes I actually find source material for content for YouTube videos
01:50:08.500 in my car. So if you like my shit, um, you know, he's, you got kind of a taste of who he's all 0.98
01:50:13.480 about. Um, at the very least, I promise that you'll be entertained. You may not agree with 0.99
01:50:18.260 everything, but at least you'll, it'll give you some food for thought beyond what I've provided
01:50:22.840 for you as well. So, um, thanks for tuning in today, Jay. Appreciate you being around. Just stick
01:50:28.000 around for just one minute. Um, I'm going to play the outro reel and we'll chop it up offline in
01:50:31.460 per second. All right, guys, if you enjoyed that podcast, make sure you visit my website at
01:50:36.000 richcooper.ca to learn more about my courses, my book, the unplugged alpha community, or booking
01:50:42.560 me for private coaching. Also, if you are a Canadian with $15,000 or more of credit card
01:50:47.360 debt and what you are doing right now, isn't paying off the balances, then visit total debt
01:50:52.500 freedom.ca and hit get a free quote to see if you qualify to settle your credit card debt
01:50:58.440 for less than you owe today over the next 48 months. Make sure you check out the top pin
01:51:02.600 comment on YouTube for all the links mentioned during the show. Peace.