REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 1027. Q&AF： Building Long-Term Goals, Scaling Without Losing Your Mind & You're On Your Own

00:00:00.000 what is up guys it's andy for selling this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies the 0.99

00:00:21.960 fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today 0.95

00:00:27.440 we have qnaf that is where you submit the questions and we give you the answers now you

00:00:32.420 can submit your questions a bunch of different ways dj's going to tell you how guys you can email

00:00:36.720 your questions in to ask andy at 80 for seller.com you can also click the link in the description

00:00:41.800 right here and submit them online or you can just drop them in the comments in the qnaf videos on

00:00:47.140 the tube other times we're going to have shows within the show tomorrow we're going to have

00:00:53.380 cruised the internet we call that cti that's where we put topics on the screen current events we

00:00:58.380 speculate on what's really going on and we talk about how we the people have to solve these

00:01:03.240 problems going on other times we're going to have real talk real talk just 5 20 minutes of me giving

00:01:07.040 you some real talk and then occasionally we're going to have 75 hard versus that is where a

00:01:12.660 person who has completed 75 hard comes on the show talks about how they were before how they

00:01:17.340 are now and how they use 75 hard to take back control of their life if you're unfamiliar with

00:01:22.980 75 hard it is the initial phase of the live hard program which is the world's most popular mental

00:01:28.640 transformation program in history you can get that entire program for free at episode 208 on the audio

00:01:36.560 feed again that's 208 on the audio feed only or you can go to andyfricella.com and buy the book

00:01:44.660 on mental toughness it has the entire live hard program and a whole bunch of other info that's

00:01:49.280 not on that free episode uh if you're somebody who likes the ins and outs and the nuts and bolts

00:01:53.800 and all the details that's the that's the way to go uh obviously it's not free but it is more in

00:01:59.200 depth let's see we are the biggest show in the world that doesn't run ads that is a fact all

00:02:05.800 right the reason we don't run ads is because i do not want to be told what i can and can't say

00:02:12.600 ever so i make a little deal with you guys it goes like this if you like the show if it makes

00:02:20.560 you laugh it makes you think if it's something of value realize that the only way our show grows

00:02:26.000 because we don't have a big network behind us and we don't have a big uh ad campaign it only

00:02:31.420 grows through word of mouth and uh we just ask very simply that if you enjoy the show the specific 0.96

00:02:36.700 episode share that bitch out all right so don't be a hoe share the show all right this episode 0.99

00:02:43.480 yeah i mean some people think they could share one for the whole year and they've done their 0.99

00:02:47.500 little deal like that's not the deal man the deal is every episode okay if it gives you value yeah 0.99

00:02:53.240 if you think it sucks fucking don't share it yeah but they never suck they don't suck yeah that's 0.97

00:02:58.500 right man what's going on dog nothing dude yeah i got a little uh you know i don't i know we can't 1.00

00:03:04.740 really talk about it but i have some shit i got some drink in my cup yeah gas it's my favorite 0.91

00:03:11.920 drink we've had so far absolute gas yeah yeah it's uh let's just tell them what it is no i can't no 0.98

00:03:19.920 no i'm saying like we just beep it you know this is fucking gas yeah it is like this is my summer 0.83

00:03:28.460 drink no doubt like drink like not drink it's a drink and what do you call it though because like 0.96

00:03:36.600 you're used to calling it like purple it's pink give me some of the red this is pink no but it's

00:03:41.180 clear it's what do you say you guys you're gonna be confused just the drink dog yeah just simply

00:03:48.300 a drink give me the drink i want the drink all right you know i'm saying yeah then that now the

00:03:52.540 yellow drink's good too the yellow is good bro i'll drink the yellow juice all day long yeah

00:03:56.380 yeah we're gonna name that one golden shower if i said that kind of sounded like i'll drink urine

00:04:02.640 didn't it well enough of that it's time to get better today that is good though isn't it bro 0.99

00:04:11.240 it's fucking gas yeah it's absolute gas dude fuck i'm excited dude you know just when i think 0.98

00:04:16.980 you know yeah it's there you know remember we're still learning yeah we're still learning yeah 1.00

00:04:23.200 Perspective is a powerful fucking thing, isn't it? 0.98

00:04:25.680 Yeah. 0.99

00:04:26.160 You know what I'm saying?

00:04:26.960 Yeah, you can see things many different ways.

00:04:30.520 It's the exact same thing.

00:04:31.380 And I think that how you choose to see anything is really going to be responsible

00:04:36.160 and dictate the quality of your life.

00:04:38.460 Yeah.

00:04:39.100 Or the quality of your products.

00:04:40.620 Yeah, yeah. 1.00

00:04:41.620 Or how shit your life is. 1.00

00:04:43.000 Right. 1.00

00:04:43.800 100%, dude.

00:04:44.720 Absolutely, man.

00:04:45.420 Well, guys, it's Q&AF.

00:04:47.400 We got three good ones for you, bro.

00:04:49.320 Cool.

00:04:49.940 Let's get better, guys.

00:04:50.960 uh andy question number one andy with an exclamation point um andy i'm a 23 year old

00:05:00.800 female medical student with a very clear vision for my life i often feel misunderstood by my

00:05:07.500 family and those around me because many people deemed the goals i've already set and achieved

00:05:13.040 as impossible i was and still am often ridiculed with people telling me i won't make it anyway

00:05:18.720 My long-term goal is to immigrate, which is why I choose a field like medicine that isn't tied to a specific country.

00:05:27.980 I'm already learning the language and immersing myself in the culture.

00:05:31.180 I'm seeking advice on how to effectively build a foundation for long arc goals that span a decade or more.

00:05:38.600 My question is, what is the best way to lay the groundwork for goals that are still far off, 10 years more in the future?

00:05:46.960 How do you do that?

00:05:47.520 well look first of all goals that took 10 years 10 years ago now take three years or four years

00:05:55.280 because of the different technologies that we have so it's hard to put a time frame

00:05:59.600 because of the evolution and the speed at which technology is changing in the world

00:06:04.340 my 10-year goals when i started in 1999 that was a much different amount of ground to cover than

00:06:12.600 a 10-year goal now and which is really great for for you guys you know we have a lot of talk about

00:06:17.960 you know how hard it is to succeed and all these things but it's always been hard

00:06:24.320 and i would honestly trade places with any of you at this current time even considering what's going

00:06:30.640 on in the world to be 20 years old again and have the ability to cover way more ground in a much

00:06:36.080 shorter period of time yeah so let's be careful about how much we think we can accomplish in 10

00:06:41.260 years because it's probably a whole lot more than you think at this point in time because

00:06:44.700 that ability to to accelerate is only going to get more and more and more so that's the first

00:06:51.340 thing the second thing is in order to achieve any goals you have to understand that you are going

00:06:58.640 into a battle okay a metaphorical battle and you cannot go into the battle with bad tools and bad

00:07:09.020 weapons if i if we were in a real battle and i sent you out there against people who were

00:07:14.660 you know had rocket launchers and machine guns and i gave you a little buck knife you're going

00:07:19.840 to get killed all right you're not going to be successful no matter what you do no matter how

00:07:24.280 tough you are no matter it doesn't matter the tools that they have are better than the tools

00:07:29.600 that you have and for that reason you don't have a chance so we have to understand that our mind

00:07:36.980 and our body is the tool that is our weapon system that is what allows us to accomplish

00:07:44.380 the goals that we're going to accomplish and far too many people don't realize this they

00:07:49.800 don't realize that if you're not finely tuned and you're not training your mind and you're

00:07:54.300 not holding yourself into the best possible condition you are in a situation where you

00:07:59.600 are at a disadvantage against people who are so how should you look at this well the number

00:08:05.880 one reason that most people can't achieve their goals isn't because they don't know how to achieve

00:08:11.560 them. It's because they lack the ability to adhere to the steps of achieving the goal for a long

00:08:17.960 enough period of time for those things to materialize. So you have to be able to cultivate

00:08:25.000 and understand that the skills of resilience and fortitude and grit and mental toughness

00:08:34.880 and the ability to endure and the ability to adhere these are the things that number one give

00:08:43.000 you the confidence to achieve these goals but number two give you the very practical ability

00:08:48.260 to follow a plan for much longer than you might be excited about following it all right so this

00:08:57.760 is the purpose of the live hard and the 75 hard lifestyle a lot of people don't understand that

00:09:03.980 75 hard and live hard are to be completed every single year this is a lifestyle this is not a one

00:09:09.640 hit it fix it type thing these skill sets that I just mentioned grit fortitude mental toughness

00:09:16.620 discipline the ability to endure resilience all these things they have to be trained

00:09:21.880 all the time because they are perishable it's no different than any other perishable skill

00:09:28.960 if you want to learn how to play the guitar and you get pretty decent at guitar and you stop for

00:09:35.440 a year you're not going to be as good if you stop for five years you're going to be starting over

00:09:39.620 these are things that you have to understand about your own tools your your mind your body

00:09:46.640 so learning that at a young age because you're very young and being able to be conscious of that

00:09:56.000 and become aware of that and keep that finely tuned

00:09:59.300 will give you the ability to adhere to your plan

00:10:03.460 much longer at a much higher level than everybody else.

00:10:08.120 That is a huge advantage because 98% of people,

00:10:12.360 they quit the minute that it becomes inconvenient.

00:10:15.960 The minute that something happens that they don't like

00:10:18.900 or the minute that they get bored with it,

00:10:21.060 they're saying, you know, I've done a lot of reflection

00:10:24.420 and I've realized that this just isn't for me.

00:10:27.000 Well, listen, dude, nothing's gonna be for you

00:10:29.260 because every single thing that you could possibly choose

00:10:33.380 on the entire planet to do is going to get boring

00:10:37.360 and it's going to get monotonous

00:10:38.780 and it's going to get to a place

00:10:40.060 where you don't feel like doing it.

00:10:41.700 And if you don't have the ability

00:10:42.920 to push through those times, you cannot get there.

00:10:45.940 If you start over every single time

00:10:47.960 something starts to feel boring or monotonous

00:10:50.720 or not exciting, you're never gonna get

00:10:53.220 to the place you're trying to get and this is the mistake that most people make most people start a

00:10:58.320 thing they have this amazing energy quote-unquote motivation they let that motivation drive them to

00:11:06.600 the point where it's no longer exciting the motivation fades they lose the fuel to move

00:11:12.080 down the path you have to operate on a different understanding is that the real progress in life

00:11:19.660 is not made when you're motivated the real progress in life is made when you'd rather do

00:11:24.460 anything else and you still do what it is you're trying to do at a high level that is the separator

00:11:30.780 between those who do and those who don't and if you can develop that and you can keep that in mind

00:11:37.380 and you can keep that finely tuned you will be at a massive advantage over everybody else so that is

00:11:43.260 the second thing understand you have to control what you control you have to always finely tune

00:11:48.720 your mind you have to keep your body in the best shape that it can be because these are your tools

00:11:53.040 your weapons that you're using to fight the life resistance that comes your way when you are an

00:11:59.660 ambitious person okay and number three um you need to get very specific okay i want to do this

00:12:08.500 and you break it down backwards into daily critical tasks that have to be done every single

00:12:13.820 day that will eventually lead you to there and guess what i've built a piece of technology that

00:12:19.440 actually does this for you if you go to operator standard and get on the wait list because we're

00:12:24.240 still in beta and we're still in the the mvp mode we are going to open that up very soon

00:12:29.960 go get on the wait list for operator standard go on my website join the wait list and when this

00:12:36.320 launches there's there's thousands of people in there already they took advantage of jumping into

00:12:40.760 it in uh december and they've done an amazing job helping us find the holes and figure out what

00:12:47.000 needs to be and how to do but this technology is amazing because what it actually does

00:12:51.580 is you get to tell it what you're trying to do and it breaks down the critical task all the way

00:12:57.120 down to today that helps you get to where you're trying to go so you're not questioning what you

00:13:02.860 actually need to do yeah it takes that vagueness that's just one of the things it does this this 0.98

00:13:08.220 thing is like fucking jarvis for winners okay i can't even tell you all the shit that's gonna 0.79

00:13:13.860 come out with it and what we're working on but that it does that now so um you can either do 0.98

00:13:20.740 that yourself or you can get that and fucking use that and so those are the three things that 0.84

00:13:28.800 you have to do let me ask you this andy because i know like i said i mean we we talk you know 0.98

00:13:33.160 oftentimes outside of this just life shit you know and i remember asking this was years ago

00:13:38.080 did i ask her i'm like you know did you know that you would be where you are today and your answer 0.52

00:13:43.480 because you know most people like oh no i didn't know i just you know like no this is what i

00:13:47.560 expected that's right right and and i think i guess my question is and it may not even be the

00:13:52.180 right word but in 1999 19 year old andy was there like a level of like blind confidence at that time

00:14:01.660 like you know what i'm saying so it's so the answer is yes and no okay did i know we would be

00:14:06.940 here specifically not exactly did i know that i would be in a position where i was winning

00:14:13.840 yes on an undeniable undeniable winning yes i expected that that was not ever a doubt in my

00:14:20.580 mind i just kept moving and that is like what faith is about right right like yeah i said blind

00:14:25.940 confidence well look dude the work's always going to come before the belief yeah all right people

00:14:33.040 think that when they start out they have to have this amazing belief in their ability to accomplish

00:14:38.440 things and because they don't they think there's something wrong with them but they've got the the

00:14:42.960 order of operations backwards okay the truth of the matter is is the only way that you start

00:14:48.700 believing that you're actually going to get there like truly believing it like you said at the

00:14:52.740 beginning you're like i want to be there that's where i want to be i would like to be there yes

00:14:56.800 and and because people lack confidence which goes back to the live hard program they they they say

00:15:04.780 man i don't really believe that and what happens is that freezes them up in the beginning and

00:15:08.640 they're not realizing that you have to go and you have to do some of the work and you've got to do

00:15:14.780 the work for a considerable amount of time not a month not three months not six months not a year

00:15:19.400 we're talking years okay and eventually you get to a point where it starts to produce results 0.99

00:15:26.620 And you're like, oh shit. Okay. This makes sense. I work. I see some results. I get some more belief. Okay. And when that cycle happens two or three times where you start to really learn that your inputs equal a certain output, now confidence isn't a problem because you understand what the game is about. 0.99

00:15:45.520 yeah so the the reality is is you have to do the work blindly the best that you can and by the way

00:15:55.020 we have incredible tools like we talked about in the operator standard that will help you

00:16:00.760 understand the things you should do when you may not know what to do as long as you do them and

00:16:05.240 then they start to produce results you learn that confidence and that's where the expectation comes

00:16:09.720 in so once you get to a point where you've you know you've put the ingredients in you've baked

00:16:15.600 the cake the cake comes out it's pretty good you put the ingredients in you baked another cake the

00:16:20.000 cake comes out pretty good you put the ingredients you bake another cake the cake comes out better 1.00

00:16:24.760 and you continue that process it doesn't take that long before you figure out like fuck dude 0.98

00:16:30.080 i can do this and this is great so now you know what it takes to actually move forward and you're 0.97

00:16:35.660 in a position to move forward with confidence understanding that you now expect to be successful

00:16:43.600 you're not hoping or wishing or doubting it right you understand that if i put this work in it will

00:16:51.100 produce this result and that's a very freeing feeling because it removes the things like doubt

00:16:57.940 it removes the things like uncertainty it removes the lack of confidence and now you understand

00:17:03.520 that is is simply inputs and outputs and that's what we have to understand dude expecting to win

00:17:10.040 is completely different than hoping to win yeah okay hoping to win is man you know maybe if i do

00:17:19.720 some of this work a lucky break will happen i'll meet someone something will happen people will

00:17:24.620 like it i'll go viral i'll do this i'll do that that's hope expecting is i'm going to do whatever 0.97

00:17:31.200 the fuck it takes no matter what to produce this result and that result is going to fucking happen 0.98

00:17:37.340 and i don't give a shit if the fucking world ends that result is still going to fucking happen 0.99

00:17:41.900 that's a different thing okay totally different thing and the only people who actually win are 0.98

00:17:47.880 the people who eventually get to a point where they expect it but you've got to build that part

00:17:52.860 by doing the work not really understanding until you see the results a few times to gain that

00:17:59.400 confidence of expectation yeah it's like it's like the hockey stick you talk like you're gonna

00:18:03.520 go for a minute without seeing anything no no fruits at all yeah yeah most people will quit

00:18:08.640 i mean dude look man most people are quitting their goal in six months yeah like nothing happens

00:18:15.360 in six months okay and and that was not that's not a new thing by the way i mean we could blame

00:18:20.420 the internet and say oh yeah it's all these influencers times are changing it it's more in

00:18:26.360 your face now but even when you were younger even when i i was younger that's the same way people

00:18:32.500 operated okay they operated from a place of relying completely on their motivation and not

00:18:39.360 on pushing past the point where the motivation fades or working until something bad happens and

00:18:47.200 then saying oh well something's bad happened to me and that's the story they tell for their whole

00:18:50.780 life you have to keep going through those things and if you don't you just have to accept that

00:18:56.320 you're not going to ever become what it is you're going to become.

00:18:58.560 What most people do their entire lives is they go for one or two or three years

00:19:03.020 and the thing doesn't work out.

00:19:05.980 And they say, oh, this isn't for me.

00:19:07.580 I'm going to try something else.

00:19:08.820 They go to the new thing.

00:19:10.200 One, two, three years.

00:19:11.380 It doesn't work out.

00:19:12.840 They repeat the process.

00:19:14.240 And before you know it, you've done that six times 0.99

00:19:16.620 and it's taken you fucking, you know, 18 years of your life. 1.00

00:19:20.540 You're 38 years old and you don't know what the fuck you're going to do with your life. 1.00

00:19:23.640 that is the danger of not pushing through the monotony of achieving anything and there's not 0.99

00:19:31.960 a single person on the planet i don't care if it's elon musk i don't care if it's bezos i don't care

00:19:38.180 if it's michael jordan i don't care if it's tom brady it they're every single person these people

00:19:44.380 they are experts at doing the work diligently at a high level after the excitement fades

00:19:54.060 that's where things are really produced you're not even producing anything before the excitement

00:20:00.260 fades like yeah brother that's crazy to think about dude yeah that's crazy yeah yeah once the

00:20:07.840 new car smell wears off what are you doing then oh i'm gonna get a new car that's right you know 0.98

00:20:12.260 that's right yeah that's wild yeah that's how people think fuck man i love it man let's keep 0.95

00:20:18.160 moving guys guys any question number two andy i own a small roofing company in iowa 0.98

00:20:23.940 for the first few years it was exciting because everything felt like growth i've hired eight more

00:20:30.060 guys full-time we are making more money than we ever have and are backed up almost four months

00:20:36.860 which is huge for us. But lately the pressure has started feeling different. Now I've got

00:20:42.680 employees with families, depending on these paychecks, customers are trusting us with big

00:20:47.020 money and mistakes cost way more than they used to. I still want to grow, but sometimes I honestly

00:20:54.700 miss when it was smaller and simpler. How did you handle that place realizing that your decisions

00:21:01.020 affect a lot more than just you now um i certainly leaned into it i didn't run away from it

00:21:08.560 you know for me that happened about when i was 13 or 14 years into my business um

00:21:15.740 you can only go so far when it's about you okay when when your purpose is about you

00:21:25.220 and you go out and you make enough money

00:21:27.940 and you're able to, you know, pay your bills

00:21:31.300 and, you know, maybe you have a couple toys

00:21:33.380 and you're not in a financial position of stress

00:21:36.020 the way that you were, comfort starts to set in.

00:21:39.820 And when comfort starts to set in,

00:21:42.200 that's when things get real dangerous

00:21:44.500 because most of the time when comfort sets in,

00:21:47.120 people stop going and doing the things

00:21:49.180 that got them to that point.

00:21:50.540 And while all of their competitors

00:21:52.380 are still doing those things,

00:21:53.800 and then they end up losing and they can't figure out why they lost because they're like well you

00:21:59.920 know i was doing good but now things are not good well yeah the reason things aren't good is because

00:22:04.900 you're playing a game that runs on a sliding scale you are actually competing against other

00:22:09.120 human beings and when the when everybody else is moving forward and you stand still they're

00:22:14.860 gonna pass you it's no different than getting way ahead in a marathon and then deciding to pull out

00:22:19.020 your lawn chair and say, man, you know what? I'm so far ahead. This is great. I'm at mile 19. I'm

00:22:24.340 going to chill. I'm going to, and then eventually they pass you up and then you, you can't catch

00:22:28.340 them because you have to start the momentum over again. So, so you have to understand that comfort

00:22:34.080 is super dangerous. And the way you should be looking at this is this is a reignition of your

00:22:40.500 responsibilities that will cause you to continue to progress learn work grow and create at a bigger

00:22:50.140 scale level what you should be doing right now by the way the four-month wait list is not good

00:22:54.920 just so you know okay no you think that's good for you where you that's not good it's perspective

00:23:00.060 you know why that's not good because those people that are waiting for four months

00:23:03.300 might hire someone that can do it tomorrow okay so while you think it's good because we got all

00:23:08.920 this business on the books you're thinking about yourself you're not thinking about your employees

00:23:13.520 and dude if you're an ethical business owner you have to understand that you have a responsibility

00:23:18.500 for the people who have bet on you for their livelihoods those men and those women have bet

00:23:24.460 on you for their livelihoods understand that and if you can't take that seriously not only will you 0.98

00:23:31.500 not win you're kind of a shit shitty owner not even kind of you are all right so this is a point 0.98

00:23:38.280 in time where your intent naturally moves and this happens to all entrepreneurs who scale okay 0.99

00:23:46.640 it naturally moves from what I need to do for me to a point where I have to grow because these

00:23:55.440 people are betting on me and they have families and they have homes and they have obligations

00:24:00.140 and if I don't grow the business they're not going to be able to pay those things and that's

00:24:04.840 a different kind of pressure it's kind of like i imagine like when people have children and it's 0.99

00:24:10.200 all about themselves and then all of a sudden there's this little fucking sack of meat that 0.99

00:24:14.320 comes out and you're like holy shit dude if i don't do it this kid's gonna fucking starve yeah 0.99

00:24:19.840 okay now i've never experienced it in that way but i imagine that's what it feels like 100 okay 0.99

00:24:24.520 yeah that's what i've been told yeah but that same responsibility and obligation should be

00:24:31.640 put on your employees as well okay because like dude these people are betting on you man they're

00:24:39.260 betting their lives they're betting their families they're betting their futures on you 1.00

00:24:42.660 and if you sit there because you have you know a couple bucks in the bank you're a piece of shit 1.00

00:24:48.940 that's the truth okay because they're betting on you you have to understand that they are betting 1.00

00:24:53.700 on you okay and you a lot of people like to bitch nobody believes in me nobody what about all those 1.00

00:25:00.880 employees that show up every day they fucking believe in you otherwise they wouldn't fucking 0.98

00:25:05.140 be there okay so how you should be looking that this now is to change the responsibility and the 0.97

00:25:12.260 intent from yourself to them all right and when you can do that and then you expand the vision

00:25:19.260 of your growth to include their hopes and dreams and what they're trying to accomplish underneath

00:25:26.000 that umbrella, now you start to create a really great company that solves the problem of overwhelm

00:25:32.700 that you're currently experiencing. When you have people that understand that they can actually

00:25:41.180 achieve what they're trying to, they can make enough money, they can bill what they want,

00:25:46.000 they can live in the house they want, they can drive the car they want, they can do these things

00:25:49.620 in your system now you're in a situation where they are willing to help you in a very proactive

00:25:57.360 way to handle the minutiae and the overwhelm that comes with scaling so your choices are this 0.99

00:26:05.220 yeah you can reminisce about the good old days but remember in the good old days you were fucking 0.64

00:26:10.920 broke okay you didn't have the bass boat you didn't have the corvette you didn't have the 1.00

00:26:16.160 escalade you didn't have a nice house you were starving and you had to watch what the fuck you 0.97

00:26:21.360 ordered at the restaurant see everybody likes to reminisce about the good old days but they forget 0.93

00:26:25.600 those things yeah okay so let's be real about what you're talking about and i would remove this idea

00:26:32.000 from your head because there is a metaphysical quantophysical element to what you desire in your

00:26:37.580 brain that the universe and god will provide for you so if you start to think man i really would 0.97

00:26:43.920 just like to live a simple life and all this shit uh god's gonna find a way to deliver that to you

00:26:48.680 and you may not like the way he delivers it yeah so you need to be thinking about the other people 0.94

00:26:53.880 you need to be thinking about their well-being and when you can go from thinking about you to

00:26:57.660 thinking about them it unlocks a whole new level in entrepreneurs yeah well dude and like again

00:27:02.940 we've we've talked about this before man it's like you know like dude you said you say it like

00:27:07.800 man i miss the store days i mean i do miss it but my job my role is different it's changed it's

00:27:13.240 vault you know i'm saying how many different hats have you worn all of them you know what i'm saying

00:27:17.180 hr dude all of them i pack boxes dude i remember whenever we we first started shipping out dude

00:27:23.500 uh at four o'clock in the afternoon we would go out and literally pack the boxes okay before that

00:27:30.540 when it was just me and chris we would print shit out on a printer and there'd be like five or six

00:27:35.480 boxes and we would pack them and order them i mean i've done everything yeah everything from

00:27:40.080 sweeping the floors to being the ceo to being chairman of the board like ever everything

00:27:45.280 everything i've done everything yeah okay you got to get comfortable in what that role is now yes

00:27:50.120 and that role will evolve and when you get a new role that's going to come with different

00:27:54.420 responsibilities the reason that i like the quote-unquote good old days was because i got

00:27:59.960 to deal more with customers face to face that's not reality for me anymore not because it was

00:28:04.460 easier no that's i just enjoyed it yeah so i find other ways to do that for example how i do that

00:28:10.660 now is instead of dealing with customers face to face i will walk the floors and i will talk to

00:28:15.640 the people and i will talk to them and i will help them with what they are doing and i get that same

00:28:21.300 sort of reward in a different way yeah so yeah yeah man uh look dude this is very simple stop

00:28:30.240 thinking about yourself start understanding that you have a massive responsibility to take care of

00:28:34.580 your employees and that little fire that you feel like is getting a little uh you know small is

00:28:40.840 going to reignite in a way that's much bigger than it ever was because there's one it's one

00:28:45.120 thing to worry about yourself okay like i know how to survive being broke all right it's i don't 0.56

00:28:52.740 ever want to go back there but the reality is is if i had to i could fucking do it and it wouldn't 0.58

00:28:57.000 it wouldn't be a deal when i think of my employees in any company that i'm involved in or own and i 0.80

00:29:08.080 think about them having the obligation of children and i think about their bills and i think about 0.99

00:29:12.360 the things that they have these are serious obligations dude and i always think like fuck 0.99

00:29:17.920 what what's going to happen if if they lose their job like i that i hate that i don't want i don't 0.85

00:29:24.920 want that to happen yeah and and if i'm being honest sometimes i care about that too much which 0.96

00:29:30.720 causes me to hang on to employees longer than i should oh that's a whole yeah fucking conversation 0.94

00:29:35.840 because dude like i am you got a good heart i do and sometimes it's fucked me but the 0.97

00:29:42.760 the overall result is still much better because of it yeah i love it i love it guys andy let's 0.74

00:29:51.760 get to our third and final question guys any question number three uh andy i think i spent

00:29:57.980 most of my early 20s subconsciously waiting for someone to point me in the right direction

00:30:04.560 a mentor an opportunity a break something now i'm 30 and i'm realizing nobody's coming

00:30:13.000 no shit andy uh if i want a different life it's on me to build it yep but was there a moment

00:30:21.540 for you where that fully clicked and once it did how did you change the way you approach life 0.99

00:30:27.240 did you move differently

00:30:28.480 well look i started when i was 19 i didn't have any money we had 12 000 that we used to pay the

00:30:42.660 rent for our store for an entire year because nobody would rent to us because we didn't have

00:30:48.840 credit and we didn't have anything that would make them want to rent to us so then we had to

00:30:53.960 finance the rest of everything on the credit cards which put pressure on us and put debt on us

00:30:58.020 so I didn't have a choice all right I had to go and

00:31:03.980 for a long time we had smaller competitors

00:31:12.380 who even at that level you know they're they came from a rich family they had an inheritance they

00:31:21.460 had an investor they had something and i used to be really bitter about that i used to get really

00:31:29.340 mad about it the first especially the first three or four years where like literally we weren't 0.92

00:31:35.360 making any money it would really irritate me i was like what the fuck you know we got to compete 0.92

00:31:40.880 against all these people who have all this and that and this and this and this but what i started 0.95

00:31:46.700 to realize is that because those people had those resources they weren't learning the lessons that

00:31:55.660 they needed to learn that made them effective and so by year four five six i was being able to

00:32:02.060 outmaneuver them like very easily and they couldn't figure out why well the reason why was because i

00:32:10.100 started with nothing and I had to figure it out and they started with the safety net and they

00:32:14.300 didn't have to figure it out they could always go to just writing a check or going back to the

00:32:17.640 investor or going to their trust fund or whatever they had to do so I started to understand that I

00:32:23.180 was learning these skills that they didn't learn by year 10 I had put most of these people out of

00:32:27.340 business okay so I went through that in a little bit different way but I did realize from the very 0.98

00:32:36.320 beginning that it was on me and nobody else like nobody was going to come and do any of the shit 0.84

00:32:44.940 for us like it wasn't even it wasn't even like something that I really thought about was I bitter

00:32:54.700 that other people had better advantages to me yeah until I understood that I was the one with

00:33:00.220 the advantage because people who come with resources and they come with safety nets and 0.91

00:33:05.320 they come those people never learn how to fucking fight it's just like people who complain about 0.88

00:33:11.940 how hard it was growing up and they say well i i grew up here and i grew up with the trailer and 0.99

00:33:17.620 i did this and i come from the hood and nobody gives a fuck about me do you understand how big 0.75

00:33:23.940 of a fucking advantage that actually is because you learn the skill of survival and fighting at 0.96

00:33:30.320 a very young age but because your perspective is based upon what people try to say is you know 0.98

00:33:38.460 oh that person got there because they had this or that person was lucky or that's that's what we

00:33:43.700 hear our whole lives we hear from other people around us our whole lives that literally everybody

00:33:49.420 else that's made it did so because they had some sort of advantage that you don't have that's not 0.99

00:33:57.600 the way it really works the way it really works is is that the people who build real shit they 0.96

00:34:03.860 actually come from the hardest situations early on in life because they had to learn how to survive 0.98

00:34:10.240 and provide for themselves in a way that these other people didn't you know they learned how to

00:34:16.080 fight young and when you come from that and you look at it at the right perspective which is what

00:34:22.480 i'm telling you now you are at a tremendous advantage over everybody else okay but most

00:34:28.720 people can't break free of that victim mindset and they don't understand the reality that all

00:34:34.260 of these people that they look at the reason they have all these crazy stories about where they come

00:34:39.780 from isn't because they make them up after they get there it's because the people who had to go 0.88

00:34:44.860 through the hardest shit are the people that are equipped to actually fight the battle of 1.00

00:34:48.240 entrepreneurship so this whole idea that is in society that is propagated by a bunch of fucking 1.00

00:34:55.140 people who are victim mindset losers that everybody who's done everything is somehow 1.00

00:35:00.120 you know grew up with a fucking golden spoon in their mouth is total bullshit all right the best 1.00

00:35:07.040 operators in the world came from the hardest situations every single operator that i know 1.00

00:35:11.060 that's built anything relevant those people came from shit okay so if you come from shit 0.98

00:35:18.200 you should instead of like saying oh i come from all this bad stuff and i got ptsd t2 times d from 1.00

00:35:24.760 from when i grew up like motherfucker use that shit yeah okay lean into that understand that 0.99

00:35:32.140 you are equipped with a set of skills that these other people don't have 1.00

00:35:35.360 and when you apply those skills and they continue to go down the path eventually you get to a point

00:35:44.180 where all of the people with the quote-unquote advantages have fallen off because they have

00:35:51.400 a backup plan they have comfort they don't have to succeed otherwise you know they could go they

00:35:58.920 have the ability to go back to mom and dad or go back and say oh i'll try this other thing or do

00:36:03.000 this other thing or do this other thing that's that's something you don't have and that's a

00:36:06.600 blessing that's not that's not a handicap and so you know i don't know if that really answers

00:36:15.640 your question about like how do i realize that nobody's coming the only thing you got to realize

00:36:23.140 is that like that's the that's what it is like nobody's coming bro people have their own lives 0.99

00:36:30.360 in mind they are worried about themselves this is why like all you fuckers that think everybody's 0.99

00:36:36.100 talking about you all the time bro bro they're talking about you in a passing conversation one 1.00

00:36:40.800 time they're your ego is so big you think people just obsess over what you're doing like fuck that 0.99

00:36:46.380 you know what i'm saying like they're worried about themselves so go ahead no i mean you know 0.97

00:36:51.140 like one of the things that i've always like had a hard time understanding is like that that whole

00:36:55.580 thing of like oh everybody else has got it and i don't have it's like well first like you don't

00:37:00.060 even know if they actually do have an advantage you don't know because you're just seeing the

00:37:03.260 end result not the not the work that went into that right that's one but then two who gives a 0.95

00:37:07.920 shit it ain't you it's not your situation right right you know what i'm saying it's like could 0.93

00:37:12.920 have should have would have been could have been hope hope it was too fucking bad okay it ain't 0.97

00:37:18.080 yeah it just ain't it is what it is like what and if you that's right that's right dude you have to 0.84

00:37:24.120 be dedicated to producing the end result you have to be obsessed with it dude like that's the thing 0.99

00:37:31.100 is like you know like these these idiots on the internet who put out all this shit about balance 1.00

00:37:37.080 and you gotta fucking work like there's no work-life balance as an entrepreneur that's not 1.00

00:37:40.640 real especially when you're getting it going it's not a real fucking thing okay and anybody who says 0.98

00:37:46.200 different hasn't built anything you know the whole problem with the internet is it gave a voice to 0.82

00:37:50.140 people who can talk real well and say nothing right so that's the entire problem with the

00:37:55.500 internet how many of these people saying oh you're going to have work-life balance have actually

00:38:00.160 built anything significant okay i promise you they did not have work-life balance in the first five

00:38:07.080 to ten years they didn't have it you have to be obsessed bro that's the level of competition

00:38:11.320 because you have to understand other people are obsessed there are people that will eat a bowl of 1.00

00:38:16.660 glass and eat a pile of shit every single day for as long as it takes to get where the fuck 1.00

00:38:21.540 they want to go. And if you're not one of them, they're going to beat you. That's it. That is 1.00

00:38:24.840 reality. So I had this kid messaging me the other day and like I was showing something on my

00:38:31.500 Instagram. Oh, I know what it was. I was showing the startup of my career GT and he could see all

00:38:37.520 the other cars through the windshield and he messaged me and he's like, dude, I'm so sick

00:38:42.100 of being where i'm at like honestly how do i acquire this level of wealth like how do i do it

00:38:49.500 and i'm like dude how old are you he's like 22 i'm like perfect you're the perfect age

00:38:53.940 you have to become you have to become so obsessed with producing the outcome that literally nothing 0.99

00:39:03.160 else fucking matters nothing and people will say oh that's selfish that's wrong it is what the fuck 0.96

00:39:09.560 it is that's what it takes okay if you are not obsessed with producing that outcome especially 1.00

00:39:15.880 in the beginning you're going to get eaten alive you're going to get eaten the fuck alive and it

00:39:21.860 doesn't matter what joe schmo therapist or you know dude who never built anything on the internet 1.00

00:39:27.940 who's doing shit for likes shares views remember half the shit on the internet is pacifying 0.99

00:39:34.600 victim-minded bullshit that people post to make people feel better about them not doing the thing 0.99

00:39:41.380 they're supposed to do okay learn to take a step back and watch people's content a lot of the 0.98

00:39:47.600 things that are being said are not said because they're the truth they're said because it makes

00:39:53.260 the majority of the market which is people who are not going to follow through feel much better

00:39:59.160 about not following through okay it is it is prop is giving them permission to stay where they are

00:40:06.940 and that's why it gets the like shares views that's why when you see a clip of me saying what 0.97

00:40:11.320 i just said people are like oh well are you happy yeah motherfucker i actually am happy i walk into 0.99

00:40:17.140 my garage every day and get to pick out a car like you pick out your fucking shoes okay it's cool as 0.99

00:40:22.840 fuck i get to do whatever i want if i want to go to fucking vegas today i call up and there'll be 0.99

00:40:27.780 an airplane in 30 fucking minutes and i can go there i can do whatever the fuck i want anytime 1.00

00:40:32.100 i want if one of my family members or one of my friends or somebody i know their house is about 0.99

00:40:38.580 to get foreclosed on i can fix that okay someone gets cancer i can fucking pay for that which i've 0.97

00:40:45.660 done all those things okay if our city gets hit by a tornado i can fucking contribute to that i 0.89

00:40:51.880 can make differences because and those things make me happy yeah so this whole idea of you either

00:40:59.740 get to be rich or you get to be happy is it's not either or dude it's how you get rich and what

00:41:06.960 value system you have and what you do with the money that allows you to figure out what you're

00:41:11.580 going to do when you be happy people have this lie in their mind you know because i'll tell you 0.97

00:41:15.720 this is true too after a while when you own all the material shit it stops mattering like 0.79

00:41:23.340 when i walk into my garage you know this because you've been there and we bring someone even if 0.97

00:41:29.040 they're famous into the garage who's been around it they're like holy shit to me i don't even

00:41:35.860 notice it yeah like i'm walking in i'm like this is my life this is what i do all right 0.98

00:41:40.280 i don't give a fuck about like i know you guys see me post all the cars and shit i'm posting 1.00

00:41:48.220 that for fucking 18 year old 19 year old 20 year old andy to say hey man look what the fuck you can 1.00

00:41:53.500 do how do i get that right this this idea that you can buy all the shit it's going to make you happy 1.00

00:42:00.760 no that's not that's not true but it gives you far more ability to make impact on your friends 0.97

00:42:08.340 your family your community which makes you really happy okay so you know you can't really listen to 0.98

00:42:15.480 someone who says oh are you up yeah he's got all this shit but is he happy uh well they don't know 0.97

00:42:22.720 because they never had anything okay you never hear someone who has made a bunch of money and 0.99

00:42:29.160 worked their fucking ass off and worked for 30 years and build this incredible life and then 0.51

00:42:35.880 they say oh man i wish i hadn't done that yeah that's not what the you never hear them say that 0.99

00:42:39.900 you only hear people who haven't done a motherfucking thing say that and then you 0.96

00:42:44.080 have these feel-good predators on the internet who by the way they understand what they're doing 0.97

00:42:51.660 okay this is why i call them predators they know and are aware that most of their market

00:42:59.640 is people who are going to not do the thing so they curtail their content to make people feel

00:43:07.460 great about not expanding their own human potential which is ultimately the entire goal of 0.99

00:43:14.020 being on this fucking planet listen motherfuckers these people are handicapping you and not a single 0.99

00:43:19.780 one of them has made any money outside of the the other outside of anything other than making people 1.00

00:43:25.980 feel like it's okay to just be right where they are and dude the reality is and then you have

00:43:30.600 the christians i am one who don't understand christianity and think that being a very small

00:43:38.080 little you know poor little me is somehow biblically the way you should be the bible 0.99

00:43:43.180 actually talks about you not wasting your fucking talents to become who it is you're supposed to 0.98

00:43:50.820 become god gives you gifts he gives you something inside of you that is meant for you to pull out 0.98

00:43:58.680 develop and give to the world and there's no favor in in god's eyes to not use those things it talks

00:44:08.040 about it in the bible so this whole idea of there's some sort of moral high ground of wasting

00:44:14.620 your life being a nothing is a complete lie and it is totally exploited by these feel-good predators 0.99

00:44:22.540 who know that their audience is a bunch of fucking victims and if they say something like 0.99

00:44:28.600 hey you have to be obsessed with your goals and you have to like fucking basically for a period 0.99

00:44:35.880 of time give up everything else they know that those people don't want to hear that they want 0.97

00:44:41.540 hear what they want to fucking hear it makes them feel good about how they are now and that's that's 0.97

00:44:46.280 why these people do that they know they fucking know what they're doing that's the thing you don't 0.99

00:44:51.280 understand you know how i know they know what they're doing because i know these people and 1.00

00:44:54.600 they've told me that and they've said things like that okay and it's disgusting shit imagine 0.98

00:45:00.560 bro imagine your whole business is being some sort of therapist or some sort of influencer 0.97

00:45:09.360 or some sort of author and your whole business plan is to make people feel good about being 0.99

00:45:16.100 way less than what they could be because you know that's what's going to sell shit for you 1.00

00:45:21.160 that is fucking evil shit that is predatory shit and that is what you are listening to and then 0.99

00:45:28.460 furthermore the rest of the people that post all this content about you know oh you got to have 1.00

00:45:38.340 this and this and this and listen man they've never done anything they don't know okay people

00:45:45.720 are good talkers they're not just because they can get on a microphone and get in front of an 0.99

00:45:51.060 interview and sound real smart doesn't mean they fucking know what the fuck they're talking about 0.98

00:45:54.640 okay there's these things i don't know if you know them they're called it's called acting 0.99

00:45:59.400 okay like you know there's this is another thing called lying right and just because someone like

00:46:07.820 do you ever notice that the people who seem to be the nicest are always the

00:46:10.860 ones that lie the most?

00:46:11.860 Yeah. 1.00

00:46:12.100 No shit. 0.99

00:46:12.580 Okay. 0.99

00:46:13.100 Like,

00:46:13.720 how about they're so nice?

00:46:15.660 Yeah.

00:46:15.960 Right. 1.00

00:46:16.240 And then we find out all this fucked up shit. 1.00

00:46:18.520 I'm going to tell you right now, 1.00

00:46:19.580 I'm totally fucked up. 0.99

00:46:20.940 Okay. 0.99

00:46:21.760 So I don't ever pretend to not be,

00:46:23.780 but I'm going to tell you this.

00:46:25.200 I know what I know about winning.

00:46:27.100 And if you're not obsessed with winning and you don't realize that no one's 0.98

00:46:30.420 fucking coming, 0.97

00:46:31.120 you're not going to get fucking anywhere. 1.00

00:46:32.860 I love it, 0.97

00:46:33.620 dude.

00:46:34.240 I love it,

00:46:34.760 man.

00:46:34.940 Well guys,

00:46:35.540 Andy dog,

00:46:36.280 That's a hell of a way to start a week

00:46:38.080 Alright guys, let's go out, let's get better

00:46:40.020 We'll see you tomorrow on CTI 1.00

00:46:41.200 Do not be a hoe 1.00

00:46:43.060 Share the show 1.00

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - May 18, 2026

1027. Q&AF： Building Long-Term Goals, Scaling Without Losing Your Mind & You're On Your Own

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