142. Creating Loyalty For Success
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
192.57108
Summary
In this episode, I talk about the concept of Loyalty and how it's a state of being. Loyalty is not something that just exists because you've known someone for a long time. It's a commitment or an allegiance to the future self that you're trying to build.
Transcript
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What's up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realists say goodbye to
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the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality.
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Now, before I get into anything about the show, because I know some of these clips are
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going to get shared around a little bit, I did just come right in from the gym.
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I've got to catch a plane in literally an hour and so I didn't get to change my shirt.
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So if you're watching this video and you're like, man, this guy's sweating like a motherfucker,
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I keep some laundry up and some fresh laundry up in my office, but I misjudge my inventory.
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Common mistake of a rookie business owner, right?
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Guys, today I'm going to talk to you about something that I think is super important and
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it's something that I see a lot of people really struggle with in terms of personal relationships
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in life and I see a lot of people really struggle because of their misunderstanding of the concept
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of loyalty, which is what we're going to talk about today.
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A lot of people think they understand what loyalty is.
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A lot of people, you know, they brag and they say, oh, dude, you know, I'm so loyal.
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And if you ever really look around at the people they're talking about, 99.9% of the time,
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what they're actually talking about is just people that they've known for a long time.
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People they grew up with, family members, you know, friends they've had since high school,
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And let me tell you something, and this is probably going to sting a little bit, but it's
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All my high level friends, all my friends who are very successful in business and in life,
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very few of them are still friends with people from their past.
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Um, you have to understand that's a reality of life.
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And what I see is people not really understanding the concept of what loyalty is.
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You know, you think you have loyal friends, uh, but do you really, you know, are these people
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Are they putting you on to new ideas or new skill sets?
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Usually the people that you are most quote unquote loyal to are the people that are saying
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I don't know if you should really be doing that.
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Uh, you're getting a little too cocky or Hey, you know what, man, you know, you got to remember
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I'm trying to be a more progressed, more improved, more skilled version of that.
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And people who understand that are the people that you should be building relationships with.
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Loyalty is not something, uh, that just exists because you've known someone for a long time.
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It's, it's a, it's a, it's a commitment or an allegiance to the future self that you're
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This is why it's important to audit who it is you're taking advice from and who it is
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A lot of people think loyalty is just about knowing someone for a long time.
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And guys, there's no reason that you can't be friends and support people that you've known
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But the problem that usually happens with this is that as you grow, as you become more,
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as you work harder, they start to actually hold you back.
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And this is very dangerous because they put things in your ear, uh, and they put energy
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on you that isn't productive to who you want to become, right?
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They judge you for not going out on the weekends.
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Um, they want you to go out and do things that aren't conducive to who it is you're trying
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And guys, I got to tell you, that's not loyalty at all, because if they were actually loyal
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to you, they would be doing everything they could to contribute to you, not take from you
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And this is a hard concept for people to understand because they feel like if they move on from
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these friends, if they move on from this group of people that they're going to be alone.
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Not one of my most successful friends, uh, are alone.
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They're surrounded by other people who are in support of their goals, of their dreams and
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what they're trying to accomplish all the time.
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So if you let these people, and you guys have heard me talk, if you listen to the show for
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a long time, I talk about anchors and propellers.
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You have to get rid of the anchors in your life.
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If you're, if you're running a boat and you're trying to move forward as fast as possible,
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And you got to replace those lines and those anchors with propellers, people who are loyal
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You're trying to become people who are going to hold you to a high standard, people who
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And every single great human surrounds themselves with people like that.
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Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, Dwayne Wade, who they surround themselves with other great
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They surrounded themselves with one of the greatest coaches of all time.
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Tim Grover, personal development, discipline coach who will call you on your shit no matter
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Those are the people you want to surround yourself with.
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Not Tommy and Bobby and fucking Susie from the old neighborhood who aren't doing a motherfucking
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thing except drinking beers at two o'clock on a fucking Saturday, watching football every
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fucking week while you're trying to take advantage of the time and the opportunity you have to
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And I know not everybody resonates with this message.
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I'm not saying you got to give up all your friends.
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But I am saying this, if you want to be great, you have to learn to understand who actually
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is loyal to you and who you need to be loyal back to.
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I would contribute my energy to the people that are contributing theirs to me.
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That's just my personal understanding of what I think loyalty is.
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And a lot of people don't understand how necessary it is because if you misjudge the
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idea of loyalty, you will actually hold yourself back from everything that you could potentially
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become because you don't want to hurt someone's feelings.
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You don't want to have a conversation with someone that might be uncomfortable.
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You don't want to hold them accountable to the energy they're putting on you.
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I have a lot of people in my life who dump on me.
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They think that I can solve every motherfucking problem there is.
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You know, if I go in my DMs any given day, I've got hundreds of people putting their fucking
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problems on me and I'm sorry, I can't respond to those messages.
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You know why I can't respond to those messages?
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Because I have to be the best version of myself.
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I have to go out and contribute to the people here, the hundreds of people in this building
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and in my immediate life that I need to be working for to make the best product and career that
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And by the way, that's a whole nother topic I could do a whole podcast on.
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But you have to be able to look at yourself and say, man, you know what?
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You know, all too often right now in society, everybody's worried about pointing at everybody
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They're pointing at everybody else's remarks or everybody else is saying they're criticizing
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Motherfucker, all those people that criticize you, all those people that say you should do
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Or are they just taking up space and breathing in the fucking air?
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Because I'm going to tell you right now, if Ed Milet or my brother or my business partner
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calls me up and says, hey, you got this hole in your game.
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OK, what we do is we attack people for the things that we think they need to do.
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And most of the people that attack us are not doing shit.
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You know, I said on my Instagram today, you ever notice that the people who are out there
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screaming the loudest about what you should and shouldn't believe, what you should and
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shouldn't do, how you should and shouldn't live are the people with total and disgusting
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dumpster fire of a fucking existence on this planet.
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The loudest ones are the people that don't have fucking shit going for them.
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Because we can't eliminate those people from our lives.
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Block the fuck out of them and delete their fucking existence from your brain.
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But who you do owe things to are the people who contribute to you, the people who show up
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for you, the people who help you make a better life.
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Those are the people that deserve the responses to the comments they make, not these fucking
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dumb fucks from who knows where that could be a total fucking fake.
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It could be your biggest enemy pretending to be a regular person who fucking knows.
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OK, we spend so much time and we've been conditioned to believe that, you know, other people out there
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in the Internet world have some shit figured out, bro, if they had shit figured out, they wouldn't be
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I don't know one motherfucker, not one, not a single one of my friends.
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OK, not one of those people have I ever seen go on someone else's page and make a negative
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Because they value their energy and they value their time and they know it's irrelevant and
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they know that no matter what they say to that person, that person is going to continue to
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live in their own ignorant little bubble and they're going to stay right where the fuck
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OK, so like I said a few episodes ago, this is not about pulling those people with you.
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This is not about getting Tommy and Susie and Bobby from the fucking old hood and dedicating
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This is about you running as hard and as fast as you fucking can and becoming the motherfucking
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example that not just them, but everybody can follow and learn from.
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OK, when you live a quality life and you do everything you can to be the best person you
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can and you do everything you can to to build the best life you can, those people will either
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And I can tell you from experience, this is a mistake I made.
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A lot of times forever by trying to pull those people along, those people have different plans
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for themselves, they have a different identity for themselves, they see themselves differently
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And you need to understand that so that you're not dedicating a disproportionate amount of energy
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to them, you know, trying to get them to get it.
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OK, that's the most noble thing you can do, right?
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They may not be these three people, but it's going to be a lot more people.
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There's people that I know from the past that probably fucking hate the shit out of me.
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And there's a lot more motherfuckers that go out there and win or lose 20 pounds or 100
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pounds or fucking 600 pounds or build a business or do this or that because of the shit that
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And those motherfuckers were saying to me 10 years ago, oh, who do you think you are,
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You know, and a lot of you guys missed this point.
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The person that you need to be most loyal to if you really want to embody the the the
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idea, OK, the state of being of loyalty is yourself.
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That means do everything that you need to do to take care of yourself, to build yourself
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into the best version of yourself and eliminate all the shit that doesn't contribute to that.
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Loyal to self is the first thing that has to happen for you to be loyal to anybody and
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for anybody else to be loyal back to you, because if you're pretending that you're something
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else, if you're playing down, if you're trying to soften who the fuck you are for other people's
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comfort, they're not actually loyal to you at all.
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They're loyal to a version of you that isn't even who the fuck you are.
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You have to be dedicated to building the best possible you before anyone else can even think
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about being truly loyal to you in terms of who you're trying to become, in terms of what
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you're trying to create, in terms of what life you're trying to build.
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You should be looking at your friend circle and looking at your peer circle.
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Who are you spending your time communicating with?
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Are they contributing or are they creating distraction?
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Are these people of like mind or are they interested in different things?
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Are they trying to be better or are they just trying to exist?
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But I know that the people that listen to this show are people who are fucking weapons.
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OK, these are you guys are weapons in the fucking making.
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If you're not a weapon already, which a lot of you are, you're going to be one.
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You can't just be a fucking switchblade all the time.
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OK, so think about that and think about these things.
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Audit your circle, audit your friends, audit your relationships and see who you're spending
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And if you need to upgrade that circle, this is a very important point.
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If you need to upgrade that circle, audit people you're trying to learn from.
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There's so many people out there right now trying to claim to be these experts at fucking
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And you can look at them and tell they don't have their shit together.
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You can physically look at them and say, this guy don't have it together.
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OK, so look for the holes in the people's game they're trying to teach you.
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Are they improving those holes or are they just letting them be?
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Whether you realize that now or you're going to realize that 20 years from now, you're going
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Your peer group will define who the fuck you are.
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You know, you are the sum of your five closest friends.
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OK, so if you look around and your five closest friends ain't doing shit, guess who's going
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You have to understand that being loyal is a two way street and it should be an alliance
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and a commitment to helping each other be better and be the best people that we can.
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And the sooner you can understand that, the sooner that you are going to start moving forward.
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I'm not saying, hey, fuck you, blah, blah, blah.
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But if these people are constantly antagonizing you, they're constantly saying negative things
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to you, they're constantly saying the passive aggressive bullshit that we all hear as people
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The little comments that people say and, you know, they try like I used to get the one,
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you know, like, oh, dude, you're going you're working too hard, you know, motherfucker.
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Be loyal to the people that understand those things and your life's going to get a whole