REAL AF with Andy Frisella - October 22, 2021


155. Q&AF： How To Silence "Haters," Separating Business And Personal & Hiring People With Shady Past


Episode Stats


Length

20 minutes

Words per minute

209.36076

Word count

4,333

Sentence count

415

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

10

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

On this episode of The Realist, we have QNAF on the show and we talk about how he is crushing it in the fitness and business world. We also talk about his weight loss journey and how he has been able to make it to where he is now.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 What's up guys, it's Andy Fursella and this is the show for the realist, say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality.
00:00:25.400 Guys, today we have QNAF, okay? We're going to get down to that real quick before I get into it. I'd like to remind you of the fee. The fee is very simple. If we make you think, if we taught you something, if we make you laugh, if we help you figure something out, we give you a new perspective. If you thought the content was valuable, we ask that you share it, okay?
00:00:55.400 Total content. I could do that and we could make a whole bunch of money, but it's annoying and I don't like it and I don't like when people do it to me, so I don't do it to you.
00:01:03.840 And so what I ask in return is that you guys help us grow the show and that's going to become more and more important because social media is becoming more and more restrictive.
00:01:13.700 So I'm really going to rely on you guys to spread this show around. We're going to be going to a daily show soon, which is great news, but I need you guys to spread that around, right?
00:01:25.940 A lot of times people think that everybody else is doing it and that means not that many people end up doing it. It's always the same few people that share this shit every time and you know who you are and I appreciate you guys.
00:01:35.980 But if you could help us out with that, it would be a much appreciated gesture. So DJ, why lightning? Why lightning? What's happening, bro?
00:01:46.140 Hey man, day 28. Yeah, you're killing it, dude. Keep it moving, man. You are fucking killing it, bro. I'm doing something. Yeah, it's noticeable. Like, I mean, everybody in the office is talking about it too.
00:01:56.860 I know shit. Yeah. So you're getting, you're getting, uh, you're pulling down that SIS. Yeah, I'm trying, bro. What's your weight at right now? I'm at 291 today.
00:02:05.420 Okay. That's, and you were what? Almost 360 when we met? 350? 350. Yeah. So, I mean, that's fucking awesome, man.
00:02:11.540 But I'm honestly, I'm not even worried about the scale right now. I'm just fucking working and just keeping it moving.
00:02:15.480 Yeah, bro. That's it, dude. Just stay focused. Keep moving. Keep moving forward. And, uh, you know, it's one day at a time.
00:02:22.820 It is, man. Cause we get so caught up on these daily changes, right? Like expecting them. Yeah. I'm not looking for the daily. I'm looking for the long-term shit.
00:02:28.860 Yeah. See me after 75 days. We'll talk. Yeah, bro. And the cool thing is, is whenever you've bought in that,
00:02:35.060 you're going to do something for X amount of time, no matter what, it makes it that much easier to
00:02:39.580 follow. You know, you're not sitting there watching the pot, uh, you know, waiting for the water to
00:02:43.960 boil. You know what I'm saying? You know, like, Hey, all right, I'm just going to do today. Then I'm
00:02:48.540 going to, you know, we'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow. And that's, that's how success is. You
00:02:52.900 know, a lot of people, um, they do 75 hard and they get a lot out of it, but they, sometimes they miss
00:02:58.280 the point. Like the whole point is guys, this is how you fucking build financial fortunes. This is
00:03:03.420 how you build, uh, anything of extreme value in life. It's always done one day at a time. So, um,
00:03:11.420 you know, that's how I live, dude. You know what I'm saying? I don't ever worry about tomorrow. I
00:03:15.520 worry about today. That's it. Yeah. So it's cool to see you, uh, getting after it, man. You know,
00:03:20.140 I just started myself. Yeah. I'm on a three day three now. And you know, the reason I started on
00:03:26.340 over is because dude, like this shit is so crazy in the world, man. Like it's got me so distracted
00:03:33.160 almost every day that I'm not like executing the way that I know I should be. And I'm just being
00:03:39.360 honest, you know, nobody's immune to that. Right. Like nobody's immune to chaos or distractions or,
00:03:44.120 uh, you know, bullshit, you know? And so I just wanted to keep my word to myself and everybody
00:03:52.340 else and make sure that I'm getting as much out of the time that, that this crazy shit's going on,
00:03:57.440 uh, that I can't possibly get it. And, and I could tell after only two full days that my mindset's
00:04:03.060 already back in focus where it needs to be. So it's, um, it's exciting. It's awesome, man.
00:04:08.400 Yeah. I mean, I'm, I'm just keeping it moving, man. But we got Q and AF guys. So we got three
00:04:13.580 questions for you. Um, you guys know how this works as always email your questions in to ask
00:04:18.020 Andy at Andy for seller.com. And, uh, with that being said, question one, yeah, let's go. How do
00:04:23.980 you silence the naysayers? Right? So family, friends, anyone for that matter, right? They,
00:04:28.740 they feed you this bullshit and they make you second guess your goals and aspirations. How do
00:04:32.080 you silence those people? I was taking a drink in my pre-workout. Yeah. All right. Uh, my first
00:04:38.820 form pre-workout mega watt and L carnitine buy it now. Shameless plug. Yeah.
00:04:43.580 All right. So, uh, it actually was actually is what I'm drinking. It's just pretty good.
00:04:48.780 Yeah. Uh, you know, the cool thing about those, any of those flavors, you can mix and match
00:04:53.280 and they taste good together. It's fucking weird. I'll just dry scoop mine. Yeah. No dude,
00:04:57.660 got to mix the carnitine and, and the mega watt together. Any flavors, they all go together.
00:05:02.500 It's fucking crazy. Anyway, how you like that plug bitches? So anyway, how do you silence 1.00
00:05:11.960 the naysayers? I give you one word by winning that's two words. That's two words. Yeah. All right.
00:05:17.780 By winning. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like, dude, so many people feel that you, these people
00:05:23.800 owe you their belief. You haven't done anything yet. Like we just have to have a realistic view
00:05:29.520 of our own self. If you're the person who's told somebody that you're going to lose weight for the
00:05:36.760 last 15 years and you never lost it, they have plenty of evidence to never fuck to not believe
00:05:42.000 you this time. Right. You know, if you've been talking about building a business for the last
00:05:45.980 10 years and you haven't done anything, then you have given people plenty of evidence to not believe
00:05:52.460 you. So people don't believe in you until after you've done shit. Right. Like if I walk in the
00:05:58.280 office right now and I say, Hey, I'm going to the fucking moon. There's going to be some
00:06:01.840 motherfuckers that say, how are you going to do that? But everybody in there is probably going to be
00:06:06.440 like, okay, I guess we're going to the fucking moon. Right. So like, because there's evidence
00:06:10.560 that there's evidence that I follow through on everything I say, no matter how crazy it
00:06:14.920 fucking sounds at the time. And, um, you, that's the first thing. Okay. The second thing is it goes
00:06:20.980 back to what we were talking about in the intro, dude. You, you have to fucking, you have to put 0.90
00:06:26.280 that shit out of you. You could do one of two things, right? You could either be the person who
00:06:29.820 just ignores that shit and just chips away day by day by day by day. Um, and what will
00:06:36.240 happen is those people eventually, when you start to win, they'll start to come around
00:06:41.100 and they'll start to say things like, Hey man, I see you're doing really good, you know,
00:06:45.520 or they'll, you know, make some people who really don't think you'll do it. They won't
00:06:49.460 say anything to approve you of you until you've already, you know, built your entire fucking 0.93
00:06:54.620 empire. And then they're going to say, Oh man, I always believed in you. I knew you
00:06:57.960 would do it. Right. So that's what you're dealing with. Okay. And you have to understand
00:07:03.080 like those people's opinions literally mean nothing. So the bigger question here is what's
00:07:09.620 wrong with you that you actually give a fuck that those people say those things, you know 0.67
00:07:14.580 what I'm saying? So that's the question that I would ask. Why are, why do you value people's
00:07:20.300 opinions or criticism that haven't done anything themselves? Right. We have to focus on the good
00:07:27.040 criticism, the things that help us improve the things that help us get better, the statements
00:07:31.760 that we can examine ourselves and say, Oh, okay, I can get better on that. I can do better
00:07:35.220 here. I can do better there. That's good criticism, but just hater bullshit. You're always going
00:07:40.020 to have it, dude. Like it's never going to go away. Um, young doll's got a fucking song
00:07:44.820 on it right now. You know that he's got out. What's it called? Yeah. It's a good fucking
00:07:49.840 song, dude. When you do, when you, they're supposed to hate, I forgot what the fuck he says.
00:07:53.400 But anyway, uh, the point is, is that it's a universal concept. Like people are going to
00:07:59.120 fucking hate on you. And that's just what it is. So even when you're winning. Oh yeah. Especially
00:08:03.120 when you're winning, bro. Especially when you're winning, it only gets worse. But the funny thing
00:08:06.820 is, is that when you're winning and you know, everything's good, it affects, what's it called?
00:08:10.540 Rain, rain, rain. Is that what it is? Rain, rain, go away. Yeah. Yeah. No, no, no. That ain't it,
00:08:15.140 is it? That's it. What's the lyrics? Hold on. It's raining. Uh, no, that ain't the one.
00:08:21.960 I promise you. It's when you do big shit. When you're doing big shit, they supposed to hate.
00:08:26.100 Yeah. Okay. That's the song. That's the song. All right. All right. You're right.
00:08:29.060 I love how I love how neither one of you asked the black guy in the room. Cause I definitely 1.00
00:08:32.720 did not know it. We're blacker than you. What are you talking about? You're over there listening to
00:08:36.360 Kenny G. Yeah. I have no fucking idea, but you guys, you guys are definitely more hip than me. So
00:08:40.220 that's a good song by the way. Yeah. We, you were, you had it on the other day when it came in here.
00:08:45.620 Yeah. Anyway, the point is, uh, you guys got to understand that you haven't, the truth of the
00:08:51.840 matter is you haven't done anything to earn people's belief. Okay. And so you have to like
00:08:57.340 everybody else in the world and history of the world, they're not just going to believe in you
00:09:01.140 because you're fucking breathing the air and you say, I want to do this. All right. So silencing,
00:09:06.400 silencing these people really comes down to just doing what you say you're going to do.
00:09:11.120 Right. And when I said a minute ago, I said, there's two ways to approach this, right? You can ignore
00:09:14.840 it or you could do what I do, which is I absorb all of it. I'm like, Oh, what'd you say?
00:09:19.380 Motherfucker. Okay. And I keep a mental note and I'll remember 10 years from now what so-and-so
00:09:25.780 said. Like I can remember literally every single fucking bullshit critique that I've gotten from
00:09:31.340 a friend or a family member, people that matter to me. Yeah. Okay. And they, they all think I
00:09:35.740 forgot about this shit now. Right. Like they all think like now I'm just like, Oh, he must've
00:09:39.900 forgot. Cause he's doing well. No motherfucker. I still get it. That's why I give you a weird ass
00:09:43.700 look whenever you fucking talk to me. You know what I'm saying? Awkward as fuck. Yeah, bro. I make it
00:09:47.460 awkward as fuck. Remember when that motherfucker came in our locker room that one day that Sal 1.00
00:09:51.160 used to work for? Yeah. What happened? Yeah. He got, he got the, uh, uh, you were given
00:09:54.880 the, the, what do you guys call it? Call it like the old fuck tour or the told you so tour
00:09:59.240 basically. I mean, so Sal had this boss that came in here. All right. Good guy. Oh, you
00:10:04.020 called him out immediately. I remember this now. Yeah. Good guy. But he told Sal when Sal was
00:10:08.820 going to fucking leave Johnson and Johnson, which he was the number one sales rep in the world
00:10:12.780 to come work for me that he was fucking stupid. Yeah. So Sal's giving him a tour of the fucking
00:10:17.640 HQ and I'm sitting in my recliner doing whatever the fuck I want because that's what I can do
00:10:21.980 now. Right. And here in comes Sal with this fucking dude. He's like, Oh, you remember John? And I'm
00:10:28.140 like, sure do. Yeah. I said, Hey John, remember when you told Sal I take this fucking job? Was
00:10:32.940 that not the first thing I fucking said? It was the first fucking thing I said to him. I feel
00:10:38.080 like that handshake went right to a fucking spaghetti noodle immediately. You know what?
00:10:42.760 Did he, did he fucking, did he get uncomfortable? No, he definitely did. Yeah. Definitely. And
00:10:46.560 then I made it cool. And then I was like, no bro, I'm just playing. You know, I wouldn't
00:10:49.700 have believed in it either. Yeah. But the point is he knows that I know and he knows I never
00:10:54.400 forgot about it. Right. You know what I'm saying? And I've used that as motivation for the last
00:10:58.340 fucking decade to get where we are. And that's not a knock on him, bro. No, I'm just using
00:11:04.360 that as an example. Like I remember when people do that, I have the memory of a fucking
00:11:08.880 elephant, bro. Like I remember that shit and, and I use it to drive me and I use production
00:11:14.540 pivots, right? Like when I get angry, when people don't believe in me, uh, and I start
00:11:18.300 thinking negative thoughts and I start thinking like, fuck dude, this person, cause dude, we
00:11:21.580 still all think that shit. Right. Um, then I get up and go do something productive and it's
00:11:27.800 that simple. So, uh, so yeah, man, like toughen the fuck up. Like this is something that
00:11:34.020 you're all going to deal with. Uh, you're going to deal with it forever. And the sooner
00:11:39.600 you can come to peace with the idea that people are going to criticize you negatively for doing
00:11:44.920 anything outside the norm of society. Um, you know, the quicker you can get where you want
00:11:50.600 to go because a lot of people hold themselves up because they're afraid of what so-and-so
00:11:54.860 is going to say or what so-and-so is going to say. And the truth is those people, first
00:12:00.080 of all, they don't really matter. Second of all, when it comes to terms of you achieving
00:12:04.680 things, but second of all, um, most of the time they don't even say the shit that you 0.85
00:12:09.400 imagine. Most of the time you're making up these stories in your head. I wonder what,
00:12:14.040 you know, so-and-so is going to say about me doing this. I wonder what my aunt Susie is
00:12:19.040 going to say. Fuck aunt Susie. You know what I'm saying? Like it doesn't matter what she 0.91
00:12:23.520 says. And you have to realize that you're making that story up and she probably doesn't even
00:12:27.880 think that shit. Right. So your biggest hater is some, something, a story that you're making
00:12:32.200 up in your own motherfucking head. So think about that. That's fucking deep. Yeah, it's
00:12:36.180 true, dude. It's true. Most people don't hate on you. That's just the truth. That's our
00:12:41.040 own egos telling us, Oh man, I bet everybody hates on me. That's our, that's our own self
00:12:46.080 talk, you know? Damn. So it's fucking dope. Yeah, bro. Like it's, it's normal shit. All right.
00:12:51.920 Question number two. So how do you keep business, business and personal, personal, right? So like
00:12:57.560 having somebody that may not directly work for you, um, and you can't stand them for
00:13:02.120 whatever reason it is, but you still have to work for them, work with them for business.
00:13:06.640 So how do you keep that business, business and personal, personal? Well, that what's the
00:13:10.320 objective? Yeah. What's the objective? To win, I'm assuming. Okay. Well then you got to work
00:13:15.280 with what you got. Yeah. You know, I, I personally don't really care how much I like someone sitting
00:13:22.200 across the table from me, if they can execute on part of the mission or whatever the plan
00:13:26.940 is like, if I, if I think they're annoying or if they're, you know, like, dude, honestly,
00:13:32.240 my ability to like someone has to do with, can they get shit done? Like when shit, when 0.54
00:13:36.940 people get shit done, I can deal with their quirks or their little difference of personality.
00:13:41.020 I can learn to appreciate them. There's plenty of people in our office that are, that would
00:13:45.780 normally like be abrasive to me. Okay. But I love them because they fucking kick ass. Right.
00:13:53.020 Right. And so then we're able to connect and I'm starting, I'm able to understand like that's
00:13:57.920 their process of winning. I've got my own process of winning and I can appreciate and sometimes even
00:14:02.960 learn from the way they do things, even though it's not the way I do things. So, uh, first
00:14:09.800 of all, you have to consider like, what's the mission? The mission is to win. We're here to
00:14:13.280 fucking win. We're here to kick ass. We're here to do good. And personal feelings shouldn't
00:14:17.520 really, uh, get involved in those decisions or the actions that result from the decisions.
00:14:22.300 Yeah. Um, I think that's weak shit. I think if you can't work with people that you don't like,
00:14:27.000 you're not going to be very successful. Uh, now with that being said, I think that, you know,
00:14:32.580 you should work to like those people and respect, you know, cause all real love and real like is,
00:14:38.180 is based out of respect. Right. So if I got somebody who doesn't rub me the wrong, the right way,
00:14:43.200 like, um, you know, let's just say, uh, you know, usually the people who rub me the wrong way are
00:14:49.240 just like me, by the way, no, for real, dude, they're, they're, they're a little cocky. Yeah.
00:14:53.500 They're a little fucking overly confident. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. Right. And I'm like,
00:14:57.160 no, fuck that guy. And then I think about him. I'm like, wait, he's kind of like me.
00:14:59.980 You know what I'm saying? So like, those are the people that kind of rub me the wrong way.
00:15:04.380 But when I see them go out, when I'm like, okay, this guy's got it, or this girl's got it. You know what I'm
00:15:09.620 saying? And I restart to respect it. And then I can respect their little swag.
00:15:12.840 They got, you know what I mean? Cause it's just how they do. Yeah. Right. So like, dude, you know,
00:15:17.260 this shit of like, you know, I don't like this person. Cause they got this, they say this or
00:15:22.320 that, or that like, dude, what your priorities are fucked up. That's what I'm saying. Like,
00:15:26.960 if you want to win in the big game of winning, you have to put those things aside. It's not
00:15:32.080 going to always be like it's, it's, it's going to be, did we get the job done? So that, that would be
00:15:37.280 my advice. Nope. All right. Question number three, hiring people with a bad past. Okay. So I know
00:15:44.920 you can speak personally on this, obviously. Um, but you know, we're talking people with felony
00:15:49.280 records, people currently there. I mean, there's going to be a lot of people getting dishonorably
00:15:52.540 discharged from military anti-vax stance and stuff. Right. So how do you weigh out whether or not a
00:15:57.660 person is, is genuinely truly changed, right? Like you're taking that risk. So how, first of all,
00:16:02.000 bro, I take into consideration, not everybody that's like has a felony did bad shit in my
00:16:08.700 opinion. Right. Like we have a couple of guys, a handful of people here who have been in prison
00:16:13.800 before. Okay. Uh, they're in prison. Most of them are in prison for marijuana. Guess what? I don't
00:16:19.520 think people should go to prison for marijuana. I think it's bullshit that people go to prison for
00:16:23.420 marijuana. I think it's bullshit that you can walk into a fucking liquor store and buy enough
00:16:27.860 liquor to kill yourself, but you can't, you have to go into a weed store. You could smoke the whole
00:16:33.000 motherfucking store and not die, but you can only get so much. Like, so we have to, I asked myself
00:16:39.280 like what morally did they do? Right. And then, uh, you know, if they did their time, if they paid
00:16:45.960 their punishment, I'm who am I to fucking hold that against them? So I'm a big believer in fresh
00:16:50.220 starts, man. Like I'm a big believer in like, dude, if someone paid their, paid their dues,
00:16:54.660 then we should give them a, an equal chance as everybody else. That's my opinion. I think the
00:17:00.800 world would work a lot better if we all had that opinion. Now, if you have people that, you know,
00:17:05.940 if you have a dude who went to jail cause he raped three people and he happens to be out,
00:17:09.740 I think it's probably a good idea to maybe look into that guy. You know what I'm saying? Like,
00:17:14.760 uh, if it's a super violent crime or something crazy, like I think, I think it's, it's a good idea
00:17:20.540 to look into those things. So, uh, I'm a big believer in, in fresh starts. I'm a big believer
00:17:26.540 in, uh, people making mistakes and learning from them and growing. And if I didn't give those people
00:17:32.240 an opportunity to have a start, I'd be a hypocrite in my beliefs. And one thing I don't
00:17:37.540 like to be as a hypocrite, you know, now sometimes, you know, I, I, I speak a little faster than I think
00:17:43.640 and I can, you know, but I try to catch myself because I, that's not a quality. It's not a quality
00:17:48.060 that I value at all. Um, I despise it. So, you know, I try to live in congruency with that,
00:17:53.900 with that thought process. And I think that it's important that we give people second chances when
00:17:58.180 they've paid their dues to society. Um, as far as these military guys getting, uh, dishonorably
00:18:03.840 discharged again, it's another example that I don't agree with. Like, I don't think it's dishonorable
00:18:08.880 for someone to stand up for what the fuck they believe. I think what's dishonorable is that they're
00:18:13.440 getting fucking discharged. The military is dishonorable in that situation. So I don't
00:18:19.420 subscribe to society's rules, so to speak. You know what I mean? I try to judge on my own moral
00:18:25.500 compass and give consideration on those things and then give people opportunities. I would say this,
00:18:31.420 if you own a company right now, there's never, ever been a better opportunity to hire and add to
00:18:39.940 your team of quality, integrity driven individuals. If people are willing to lose their fucking jobs
00:18:47.080 over their integrity, they're probably going to do a pretty good job for you as long as they
00:18:52.460 culturally align with your values. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So like, you know, if I own a
00:18:58.360 company, which, you know, I do, uh, I'm going to be looking to bring some of these people in. In fact,
00:19:03.440 we have brought a number of these people in already. So, um, that's how I feel about that. Yeah. Yeah.
00:19:09.400 Fucking dope, man. Is that two or three? That's all three. Oh, it was. All right. Well,
00:19:14.060 that's all, that's, that's how you're going to outro it.
00:19:17.680 Like that's all you got, bro. I couldn't say the tagline, man. So I'm like,
00:19:21.800 you got to come up with a new tag, bro. You can't say the same shit every time. Like if you say
00:19:26.000 it's one for one, two for two, three for three for the next 10 years, that's, you're not growing as a,
00:19:32.080 as a commentator. So I'm trying to push you to grow. So let's, let's, let's do this live on the
00:19:37.160 show. Okay. Let's come up with something. How do we transition here? Fuck. Yeah. Don't edit none
00:19:42.760 of this out either. Yeah. Leave this in. Cause this is coaching. I I'm taking, I'm taking the
00:19:48.580 criticism. All right. I know. Um, see, this is the criticism you want. No, no, for sure. Yeah.
00:19:53.180 Oh bro. Listen, I know no criticism that ever came from you. All right. Let's do the transition now.
00:19:59.100 Yeah. All right. That's fucking fire. That's three questions, man. All right. All right,
00:20:02.720 man. Well, Hey, look guys, that's the show. I appreciate you guys. I love you guys. Uh,
00:20:07.620 don't forget to pay the fee. And, uh, you know, as I said, the beginning of the show, that's going
00:20:12.020 to be more and more important, uh, as the Instagram and Facebook and social media overlords tighten
00:20:18.560 their noose around our free thinking necks. Um, you know, so please share it. All right. I love you
00:20:26.140 guys. I appreciate you guys. And I'll talk to you next time.
00:20:28.140 Went from sleeping on the floor. Now my jewelry box froze. Fuck a pole. Fuck a stove. Counted 1.00
00:20:33.920 millions in the cold. Bad bitch. Booty swole. Got her on bankroll. Can't fold. Doesn't know. 1.00
00:20:40.240 Headshot. Case closed.