REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 187. Let It Go

00:00:00.000 What is up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realist, say goodbye to

00:00:20.920 the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality.

00:00:24.760 Guys today I have a real talk, before I get into the real talk I'm going to remind you

00:00:28.760 of the fee, the fee is very simple, we work on value exchange just like the rest of reality.

00:00:33.920 If I do a good job, I require something from you and that something is not monetary, it's

00:00:38.400 just talk about the show, share the show, tell your like minded friends about the show, if

00:00:42.840 it made you think, if it made you laugh, if it made you have a new perspective, if it

00:00:46.320 brought value, okay, if it taught you something, share the show, all right, I don't fill your

00:00:52.220 ears with ads, I don't fucking fill your face with ads on the internet, this is word of mouth

00:00:57.160 man, and we've been able to dominate iTunes for a long motherfucking time doing it, okay,

00:01:01.340 so if you think these messages need to be heard, help me share them, all right, that's the fee.

00:01:06.180 Now today I want to talk about something man, I was scrolling Instagram and we've all have

00:01:10.440 friends that we see do these little polls and it says, tell me something secret and then

00:01:15.440 like these people post their, the people's secrets without showing who they are or whatever,

00:01:21.060 so you see some pretty interesting shit.

00:01:22.620 And I saw one today, I was scrolling through my buddy's, uh, my buddy was doing one of

00:01:27.160 these polls and I saw one today that kind of like, it kind of jolted me a little bit

00:01:32.660 because it, it reminded me honestly of, of, of something that, that most people do.

00:01:38.720 I want to talk about that.

00:01:40.360 So here's the fucking post.

00:01:42.400 Okay.

00:01:43.640 He says, he has the question box up and says, tell me something your spouse or your best

00:01:49.100 friend doesn't know about you.

00:01:50.800 And the person put in, uh, my dad cheated on my mom with Craigslist prostitutes.

00:01:56.080 And that's really why I'm in therapy.

00:01:58.540 All right, look, dude, if you're really in therapy because your fucking dad cheated with

00:02:04.620 fucking prostitutes. 1.00

00:02:06.060 Okay.

00:02:06.500 And that's got you to the point where you think you need therapy.

00:02:09.220 You have crossed the line from like normal functioning human into soft fucking cupcake

00:02:14.980 pussy land. 0.99

00:02:15.820 All right.

00:02:16.420 Let me explain something to you guys and I don't give a fuck how much this pisses people

00:02:20.500 off because I know it's like the popular thing now to, to, to like brag about your trauma

00:02:26.580 and to brag about how all the bad shit happens to you and to post your sad story over and 0.77

00:02:32.200 over and over and over again, uh, on Instagram every three days.

00:02:36.560 I'm, I'm convinced honestly that most people do Q and a just to talk about the sad shit that,

00:02:41.880 that, that has happened to them.

00:02:43.440 I see it over and over again.

00:02:45.000 It's the same people answering the same fucking questions over and over, over again, talking

00:02:49.700 about their problems and celebrating the fact that there's some sort of fucking flawed 0.74

00:02:56.280 human.

00:02:56.740 Look, motherfuckers, you can't win like that.

00:03:00.120 Okay.

00:03:00.560 For a very practical reason.

00:03:02.080 I want you to understand this.

00:03:03.300 So you don't think I'm just being me.

00:03:04.920 This is a practical thing.

00:03:07.340 You only have so much energy in your life.

00:03:10.880 You only have so much focus in your life.

00:03:13.580 You only have so much ability in your life to choose what you're going to do and what

00:03:20.200 you're going to be and what your identity and your self image is going to be.

00:03:24.760 And when you choose to be one of these victims who thinks there's an Olympics out there for

00:03:31.360 the saddest motherfucking story, that means you have no room to move forward. 0.82

00:03:37.580 You have no room for dreams.

00:03:39.500 You have no room for aspirations.

00:03:41.320 You have no room for the actions that lead to those aspirations because you're so busy filling

00:03:46.780 your mind with the bad shit that's happened to you already in life that you have zero chance 0.55

00:03:52.220 moving forward.

00:03:53.800 Explain how that makes sense.

00:03:56.440 Okay.

00:03:57.020 We live in a backwards culture where victim mentality is celebrated.

00:04:01.220 The hard shit, the bad shit, the unfortunate shit that's happened to us is glorified through

00:04:07.420 sympathy and virtue signaling where all these people, all the people, you know, pat you

00:04:13.540 on the ass and say, oh, it's okay. 0.95

00:04:14.980 It's okay.

00:04:15.540 It's okay.

00:04:16.020 Oh, you're so brave.

00:04:17.420 Oh, you're so this cool.

00:04:19.640 Maybe you are, but that shit will eventually keep you from getting the life that you actually

00:04:24.880 want.

00:04:25.820 That's the shit that's going to keep you from moving forward to keep you from focusing on

00:04:30.280 what you could be rather than what's actually happened to you in the past.

00:04:34.860 You get one or the other.

00:04:36.340 You can look forward or you can look backwards, but you can't look both ways at the same motherfucking

00:04:41.260 time.

00:04:41.620 And so many of you guys have got enamored and sucked into this victim culture that we are

00:04:47.900 shoved down our throats from the media, from Hollywood, from all these things where we brag

00:04:54.180 about the bad shit that's happened to us.

00:04:56.340 And we talk about all this help we need over here and how flawed we are.

00:05:00.960 Motherfucker, we're all flawed.

00:05:03.560 You don't think every motherfucker out there has a sad story of some sort?

00:05:08.700 Fuck, dude.

00:05:09.560 Everybody has hard shit they got to go through.

00:05:14.160 There's not a single motherfucking successful person on this planet that hasn't gone through

00:05:18.680 their version of really fucking hard shit.

00:05:22.240 And the fact that I see so many people create their identities around creating sympathy for

00:05:27.780 whatever their issues might be honestly disgusts me to the core.

00:05:31.640 That's not what you're supposed to be about.

00:05:36.080 That's not what this country's about.

00:05:38.300 That's not what our culture's supposed to be about.

00:05:41.000 And it doesn't lend itself to anything great.

00:05:44.100 It lends itself to a bunch of self-loathing, fucking weak, fucking mentally bound up,

00:05:53.380 drained of potential fucking humans, which is exactly what I talked about on the show the 0.86

00:05:58.560 other day.

00:05:58.960 They want you fat, they want you stupid, they want you lazy, they want you absorbed in your

00:06:04.840 own hardships so that you can never realize what you could potentially become.

00:06:13.520 So what's it going to be, man?

00:06:16.860 Are you going to sit there for the rest of your fucking life and talk about all the hard

00:06:20.940 shit that's happened?

00:06:22.420 Because motherfucker, I got a list a mile long.

00:06:25.100 I don't even remember a lot of my shit because, dude, I don't care to remember it because it

00:06:32.320 doesn't fucking serve me. 0.83

00:06:36.560 Learn what you need to learn from the things that have happened to you and move the fuck

00:06:40.180 on.

00:06:41.920 Oh, well, Andy, that's not as easy said as done.

00:06:44.560 No, it is actually that easy.

00:06:46.700 Oh, my dad fucking was a piece of shit.

00:06:49.040 That sucks.

00:06:50.300 I shouldn't be a piece of shit.

00:06:52.400 Move forward not being a piece of shit.

00:06:54.340 You can go to therapy for the next 100 years and talk about all this shit over and over

00:07:00.140 and over and over and over again, and that isn't going to change the fucking happen, and 0.93

00:07:03.960 that isn't going to change what the fuck you should be doing moving forward. 0.66

00:07:09.660 This is why you're not progressing.

00:07:12.620 You're so enamored by the instant gratification of likes and shares and attention that you get

00:07:17.800 for telling your sad story, and that doesn't leave any room for you to actually plan out,

00:07:24.880 visualize, think about the great shit in life that you could be creating because you're

00:07:29.880 too busy, worried, and focused on shit that you can't change. 0.80

00:07:35.180 How does that serve you?

00:07:39.000 How does that help you?

00:07:40.740 What does that do for your future?

00:07:42.280 What does it do for your future family?

00:07:48.060 We have been conditioned to tell ourselves that our story is debilitating, that our hardships

00:07:59.220 are the reason that we can't be what we want to be, when in reality, the hardships that we've

00:08:06.180 had are actually the things that teach us to teach us to have the skills and the thoughts

00:08:13.160 and the perspective we need to actually become what we want to be.

00:08:22.040 If you had to choose between having a perfect upbringing and having an upbringing that was

00:08:27.040 extremely hard, you should choose the one that was hard because it's preparing you if you

00:08:33.560 have the right perspective for what life is actually like.

00:08:38.960 So instead of spending all your time telling yourself this fucking story of how you can't

00:08:45.360 move forward because you're this and this and this and this, recognize that you're actually

00:08:50.320 being a fucking bitch. 1.00

00:08:54.340 You're selling yourself.

00:08:56.300 You are selling yourself into victimhood.

00:08:59.780 You are costing yourself your entire potential.

00:09:06.120 And I know people aren't going to like to hear this shit because people right now love

00:09:11.080 to be victims.

00:09:12.660 They love to fucking ride the sad story into the sunset and get the claps and the shares

00:09:19.120 and the likes and the attention from all the other soppy, sad story motherfuckers. 1.00

00:09:23.380 Well, I'm going to tell you what, dude, those motherfuckers don't win. 1.00

00:09:26.240 And they can hate you, they can be mad at me, they can say, Andy, fuck you, you have no

00:09:32.020 empathy, you have motherfucking, don't even let me start on the harsh shit I've been through. 0.75

00:09:36.720 This is why I can talk about this shit and I don't have a problem talking about it.

00:09:40.820 I've been through some shit.

00:09:44.020 Okay?

00:09:44.960 All of those things, every single one of them served me in some way.

00:09:50.140 It taught me something, something that I use every single day.

00:09:53.280 Once you flip your perspective from being a fucking victim to being someone who overcomes

00:10:00.740 shit, now you start to understand why it's so fucking aggravating. 0.92

00:10:06.880 There is no winner's circle.

00:10:09.520 Zero.

00:10:10.400 There's no Olympic medal.

00:10:11.780 There's no fucking championship trophy.

00:10:13.800 There's no fucking winner's circle.

00:10:15.120 There's no hall of fame for who the biggest fucking victims are.

00:10:18.240 All the championship stories, all the awards, all the accolades, all the riches, all the

00:10:25.020 fucking glory goes to people who overcome shit.

00:10:29.520 Not whine about the same motherfucking shit for 10 years straight on the fucking internet.

00:10:35.440 So think about that and think about what you're dragging along and think about the weight you're

00:10:40.540 pulling trying to get where you want to go and how unlikely you are to get there unless

00:10:45.340 you let it go.

00:10:45.980 And I bet you, you'll let it go really fucking fast.

00:10:49.180 Think about it.

00:10:51.240 You will never get where you want to go playing the victim.

00:10:56.460 You want real world proof of this?

00:10:58.580 Look at motherfuckers that win the lottery. 1.00

00:11:01.240 How many times have we heard the fucking lottery winner who wins hundreds of millions of dollars

00:11:06.980 and then five years later, their life is a complete fucking disaster. 0.72

00:11:12.220 Do you know why that is?

00:11:13.440 I tell you why that is because they were gifted something without earning the skill set that

00:11:20.900 comes with it, that you need to maintain it and you need to keep it and you need to fucking 0.98

00:11:24.840 produce more of it moving forward.

00:11:26.700 And that goes for everything.

00:11:27.960 So if you don't fucking recognize the hardships that you have as an opportunity to build skills

00:11:34.280 by overcoming them and letting them go, you're never going to develop the skills that you

00:11:39.940 need to produce more success or produce a better life or produce the shit that you that that 0.51

00:11:45.600 you want.

00:11:46.140 It's not going to happen.

00:11:48.700 So you have a choice to make.

00:11:51.020 And the choice is either continue to be like everybody else and justify every fucking hardship

00:11:57.940 that you've ever had as the reason to why you're never going to become what it is that

00:12:03.480 you become.

00:12:03.940 You can live your whole life telling the same sad story over and over and over again.

00:12:08.500 And then when you get to fucking die, hopefully you don't have to think about it and possibly

00:12:16.020 you'll get off having any regret because you had a quick death.

00:12:20.240 But that's unlikely.

00:12:21.360 More likely, you'll get to sit there and think about all the things you could have been, all

00:12:26.300 the things you wanted to be, and all the shit you wanted to do that you never did because 0.74

00:12:30.340 you spent all your time worrying about fucking being the biggest fucking victim. 0.93

00:12:36.040 Or you can learn where the real bosses live.

00:12:40.900 The real bosses live in a place where they overcome shit, where they take the hardships that

00:12:47.340 have happened to them, and they develop skill sets that move them forward.

00:12:52.180 They don't dwell on just the negative.

00:12:54.580 They're thankful for the experience because of what it taught them.

00:13:00.000 That's the perspective difference.

00:13:01.940 And that is literally the difference between people who win and live an amazing, fulfilling,

00:13:08.640 successful life, and people who die wishing that they had done all kinds of other shit.

00:13:14.240 And you get to choose which group you're going to belong to.

00:13:19.600 So what's it going to be, man?

00:13:23.220 What's it going to be?

00:13:24.920 Went from sleeping on the floor.

00:13:26.900 Now my jewelry box froze.

00:13:28.620 Fuck a pole, fuck a stove. 1.00

00:13:30.260 Counted millions in the cold.

00:13:31.940 Bad bitch, booted swole. 1.00

00:13:33.600 Got her on bankroll.

00:13:35.240 Can't fold.

00:13:36.120 Doesn't know.

00:13:36.940 Headshot case closed.

00:13:38.440 Closed.

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - December 05, 2021

187. Let It Go

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