263. Q&AF: Handling Bad Leadership, Best Advice Given & Being On Time
Episode Stats
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Summary
In this episode, we have a guest on the show who is a former police officer who has a problem with leadership within his law enforcement community. How do you deal with poor leadership in law enforcement? What is the best way to deal with bad leadership within a law enforcement organization and how can you overcome it?
Transcript
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what is up guys it's andy priscilla and this is the show for the realest say goodbye to the lies
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the fakeness and delusion of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today
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we have q and af that's where you bring the q's and and and i do the af all the other stuff i do um
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how do you submit questions guys as always email your questions in to ask andy andy for seller.com
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and we have a fee there's a fee what's the fee fee simple fee is simple but i'm asking you what
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the fee is i didn't ask if it was complicated or yeah simple i asked you what it was oh the fee
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didn't i that's what i heard that's what i heard too it was vague all right the fee is very very
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very very very very simple guys all right you guys having a hard day so basically uh here's the fee
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if you like the show share the show all right we have many different formats of the show most of
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which aren't for you um they're for me it's therapy okay today is q and af this actually is a show
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for you this is where i take my vast knowledge of how to be a bad motherfucker and make a whole lot
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of fucking money and i share it with you for fucking free so that's what you're about to hear
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um then we have cti which is cruise the internet which is basically dj and all the guys and myself
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making fun of fucking you guys out in the public all right and then there is real talk which is i tell
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you the truth and nobody likes the fucking truth so that show is definitely not for you and then we
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have full length uh podcast which is basically me and a guest teaming up on you uh to tell you that
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you're a loser and that you need to get to work so this show will actually help you the rest of the
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shows will probably just remind you that you need to work yeah all right so it's called real af i mean
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i'm fucking fuck it is what the fuck it is it is what it is man we got three good ones for you brother
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any question number one uh what what what is your take on handling bad leadership specifically within
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the law enforcement uh community so uh this guy's a police officer he has terrible culture and
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leadership inside of his department what's your advice for him uh on handling that
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is this the leader asking the question or somebody who's no he's a police officer he's worked he works
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in the police department and his leadership in the police okay let me set uh let me set something
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straight first of all um most people have complaints about leadership okay because leadership is very
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difficult to do and what you may think is a fucking problem or is something you don't like may actually
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be something that's actually for your benefit that you're not aware of because you're too busy
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criticizing other people's leadership techniques so until you're a fucking leader and you've led until
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you've built culture you really have no fucking way to understand whether you not have good leadership
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or bad leadership you really don't yeah how do you know yeah because you haven't created it
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okay so let's point that out i'm going to assume that the leadership is bad and i'm going to say i'm
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going to answer the question but my point in stating this is uh lots of people bitch about
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leadership that really don't have a bitch about leadership they're just bitches okay so i'm going
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to assume that that's not you but you're always as a leader you're always going to have people that
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are not happy with you that's part of the job part of if you are fucking well liked by every single
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person all the fucking time uh you're a shit leader okay now i'm not saying you go in and be be mean
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i'm not saying you go in and be nice i'm saying you go in and be fucking appropriate
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all right you handle the situations as they come you do the best you fucking can you think through
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them with all and sometimes you're going to make the wrong call and sometimes you're going to make
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the right call and you're going to figure it out and every time you fit make the wrong call you're
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going to get better it's a lifelong learning lessons to be a great leader all right so maybe cut the
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person to top you a little bit some fucking slack just just saying it's pretty hard to do okay now
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how do you deal with poor leadership in a scenario where you were part of a team and you were not the
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leader well that is a really good question and the way to handle it is to become such a great leader
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and influential uh leader to your peers that it transforms the culture of your team without your
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the approval or the consent of your actual leadership what does that look like oh that
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means being there for your teammates that means being positive it means whatever it is you want
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culture to be you have to create within yourself it's called 360 degree leadership there's a whole
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fucking book about it titled that by the way yeah so when you want culture to be good and you're not
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being a part of the culture that you think needs to be you are actually the problem and not to
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be yeah does that make sense yeah it does so i would start with living up to the culture that
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you believe needs to be and instead of blaming steve and oh you got shitty culture
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you think you bitching behind his back to all your people is good culture you're living the same
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standard motherfucker it's the guy with the splinter in his eye fucking pointing at the or the plank in
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his eye pointing at the splinter in yours right and that's the truth so before you complain about
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culture and leadership are you living what you think culture should be are you leading how you
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think you should be led because if the answer to those things are no then you're the problem you're
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not the solution oh yeah but he's a poor leader and we got to get him out so i'm gonna tank him by
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acting that's loser shit bro loser shit you'll always lose with that mentality the best thing you can do
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if you're in a situation where you're under leadership that you don't believe is living up to
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it is to start living to that standard bring your peers along then you know people don't like to do
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this because they say oh then the leader gets credit for it blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
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if you're that good it will be fucking obvious where it's coming from
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so that's my answer it's not what people think but yeah yeah no no that that's great i fucking love
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it any question have you have i wonder if this person has ever sat down and said hey i'm a little
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concerned about the leadership or the direction of what's going on which i i mean or even try to
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understand or contribute or teach teaching goes both ways it goes up and then it goes down right
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you know how much shit i've learned from the guys in this room that i didn't know you don't think
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i've learned every motherfucking leadership lesson the hard way or from people that i know that i was
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supposed to be leading i didn't just make the shit up right right you know this is another problem i
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have with people on the backs like with this kind of question because a lot of them will just sit
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there and fucking complain forever not trying to contribute and you wonder why your job sucks the
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reason your job sucks is because you're not contributing to a better environment
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i mean i think most of these answers could be found by looking in the fucking mirror that's real
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that's where i mean the thing is like like to you though you know right now because like he's
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saying specifically in the law enforcement community because we see all these tyrants and
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and pushing down these enforcing these mass man is that the angle he's coming from yeah it was law
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enforcement um you know i'm saying so so so things like that you know i'm saying like i mean it
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doesn't change the answer yeah you just say no yeah yeah it's not saying no it's be represent be
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the best representative of what you believe your job should be at all times internally and externally
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and guess what you're gonna fail at it sometimes you're probably failing at it now because you hate
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your leadership so my point is is that if you want things to change culturally it's up to you to
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change them culturally it's not the leader's job it's the fucking you job and once you start to get
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better and you start to hold a higher standard and you start to speak different and talk different
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teach different and care different the people around you will do the same it's contagious yes both
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ways yes and there's no that you know people say well how do i become a leader well it's not
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someone assigns you the the the title leader you got to pretend to be a leader before you're a leader
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and get recognized as a leader that's how it works just like you got to pretend to go to sleep before
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you actually go to sleep get it yeah whatever it is you want life you have to behave as if that's who
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the fuck you are and then shit will materialize around that it's not the other way around people people
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think that you are awarded the position in life and then you start behaving you start behaving like
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a billionaire you'll become a motherfucking billionaire if you adopt the habits of a
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fucking multi-millionaire guess what you'll become you see what i'm saying no you you don't just behave
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that way once you get the millions of dollars right you you behave the way and then the universe
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delivers that's how it works so if you want better culture behave the way a good culture
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uh contributor would behave and and you will see it materialize this is how it works your behavior
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determines the outcome it's not outcome then behavior change it's behavior outcome that's how it works in
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every scenario any question number two uh can you think back let's let's time travel a little bit
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think back to andy at 19 years old or maybe 18 right before s2 came along right what was the
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best advice you've been given up to that point do the right thing why was why was that because it's
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all-encompassing bro if you do the right thing listen my mom beat this into our heads when we were
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growing up you know there's a famous story that i've told a number of times uh about mountain
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berry punch kool-aid all right uh when i was a kid in fact i don't even know where the fucking story
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is and i don't feel like telling it so just plug it in here we'll find it okay here it is i feel like
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that's a stereotype that's perpetuated on unfounded facts you know uh i've had this lesson literally
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pounded into me from the time i was about five six years old um by my mom i uh it's kind of funny
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because when i say literally pounded i mean literally pounded um we were grocery shopping
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at the local grocery store here and i remember we were going down the kool-aid aisle
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and i wanted to get uh mountain berry kool-aid i remember the flavor because that's that's how severe
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uh the lesson was was instilled in me yeah um it was mountain berry which i don't
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remember how good it was because i never actually got to try it it's pretty good is it yeah flavor
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yeah cherry's a little bit over the top it's a little too sweet but what is it like a mix of berries
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yeah it's just really smooth yeah well i never got to try it so and this is this is why um
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we were going down the kool-aid aisle and i wanted to get some mountain berry and i said you know
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hey mom let's get mountain berry and and uh she said no and i you know i went on and on and said
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hey you know let's get mountain berry come on mom please let's get mountain berry no the answer was
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no was there a reason that she didn't want you to i like we didn't really have uh i'm assuming i mean
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we didn't have much money when we were younger so like um i'm pretty sure it was a financial thing
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unnecessary expenditure exactly yeah and uh so anyway we didn't get it and i decided i wanted
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it anyway so i actually just stole it um i put it in my pocket and then when we got home i didn't
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think the whole thing all the way through because i didn't know how to make kool-aid you know so when
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i got home and i wanted to use the kool-aid i had to have somebody make it so i had to go to mom and
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say hey mom you know make me some kool-aid yeah and uh when she saw that i took the kool-aid home
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uh she unleashed the fire and brimstone of ass beatings upon me um i had to go back i had to
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go in and return the kool-aid to the store so you didn't just get in trouble oh no you had to
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actually make restitution oh yeah yeah yeah we went right back to the store that's how she is man
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do the right thing do the right thing do the right thing and that that got that's that lesson was so
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um first of all like i said the ass beating was enough to like make you remember but then the
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embarrassment of it's one of my first memories honestly because i was like right in that age
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where you start remembering things right and um you know that was something i've always remembered and
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i'm 35 now i still remember that like clear as day um and i was lucky enough to have parents that
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instilled you know do the right thing no matter what in me and i and and i think
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how that ties into the to the subject we're talking about is how i feel about successful
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people in business that i've been able to you know been fortunate enough to be surrounded with
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and and get to know and call friends um the people who are truly successful understand what that means
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in the business setting and i want to basically go through some ideas and some topics to to break up
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that myth of you know you've got to step on people to get ahead or you've got to you've got to fuck
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people over if you've got to do bad shit you know to people or take advantage of people okay so that
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was the story of mountain berry punch all right um not that flavor aid shit yeah no uh-uh if i'm
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stealing i'm stealing the good shit all right so but my point is my mom beat this lesson in my
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fucking head over and over and over and over and over again and um literally sometimes uh and you
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know my mom always feels like you know she didn't i don't know she feels like she didn't do a good job
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or something or like didn't contribute enough for us but the truth is that she gave me the most
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important lesson that i could ever fucking learn which is do the right thing and uh doing the right
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thing is a really fucking hard thing to do sometimes um sometimes doing the right thing
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is is is doing the wrong thing by someone else's standards of right and wrong right um but i i believe
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that the reason that advice was the best advice is because i believe there's there's a karmic nature
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of the universe and i believe that when you make if you try to do the right thing even if you do the
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wrong thing i don't i don't think it counts against you as long as you will go back and and and adjust
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behavior um i think where you get real trouble in life is when you knowingly do the wrong thing um
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and so i've always tried to do the right thing you know i'm saying and uh
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some situations are harder than others and and you know but i think you know when you do the right
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thing i think that good things come to you i just i just believe that whether it be uh things that
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other people recognize in you meaning like they see that that you try to do that and they value you in
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terms of well that's a good person or that's a that's somebody yeah right yeah or whether that's
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the laws of of god and the universe and everything else that that rewards that intent but i am big on
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intent and i believe that the intent that you hold in your heart when you make decisions is the intent
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by which you are judged by and rewarded according to and um so you know that sounds like a simple lesson
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when you're 20 years old right but now that i'm not 20 and i have perspective and i can look back on
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the last 20 years since i was 20 uh i realized that that really is the most massive important advice
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that has shaped what you all see as my existence you see what i'm saying yeah that's fucking deep so
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um i could go over i could tell you this anytime i've ever violated that law even a little i've gotten
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burnt real fucking bad um and the times where i've just really thought i was doing the right thing
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and i i happen because that's going to happen okay like you're gonna there's going to become
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times in your life where you think you're doing the right thing at the time yeah and you realize
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that you aren't and i think the minute you realize that you aren't you should make the correction
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um and i think that when that happens the universe has grace on you i think where the universe and god
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and everything really fucking hammers people is when they when they make decisions knowing that it's the
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wrong thing and then i think that really i think when you compromise that i believe that when you
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compromise that you get punished that's my personal belief and that's my personal experience yeah um
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and my personal experience is when you do not violate that you are rewarded even if you make the
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technically wrong decision but with the right intent and then you go to correct it later you see what i'm
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saying like that would be something like you know for example my political views were a little bit
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different when i was 20 than they are now right right but as i as i grew and observed and learned
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i quickly called that out and i said well i used to believe this but i don't believe that anymore
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right right and like a lot of people um my my views were more liberal when i was younger and they've
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become more conservative because i've recognized how damaging some of the social
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the social ideals that are pushed by that side of ideology actually damage people long term right
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where people don't know their purpose or they don't understand basic how to communicate or run a
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family and they're all alone and they don't you know there's a lot of shit that really like when you
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see it from an adult's perspective from 20 to 40 it's a lot different than when you're 20 years old
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and you think you got the whole fucking shit figured out yeah and you know a lot of the people
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listening to the show are between 18 and 25 and you guys think i'm just some crazy older dude that
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like is spouting off shit no i'm i'm telling you you should listen to what i'm telling you because
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it's real shit so it's fucking yeah i think intent matters a lot i think you should really work on
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this is why i talk about whenever i talk about like haters like when people you see someone who is
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successful and your first reaction is to be angry or jealous about it and i think that's natural
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though i mean oh yeah everybody gets it a little bit oh for sure dude listen i had to work through this
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for a long time um i was a fucking wild animal when it came to that okay uh and not that that's not
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a good way to win you can win that way you're just going to be it's it's you never win better than
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people you're jealous of yeah like it's just you won't be happy yeah and so i think you know the
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work i've done on myself was to go from that place of jealousy to automatically like no this is a good
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thing because what what that shows me is that it's possible okay because what happens is jealousy
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comes from a place of lack right you see someone succeed you don't have what they have and you're not
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secure enough to know that you can do what they did so it angers you right when in reality what
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you should look at it and how i've always looked at it even if for a split second it made me jealous
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how i've worked to look at it is all right cool i'm glad steve over there won who's my main competitor
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in life and business and my arch enemy so to speak because it shows me if steve can win i can win
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and when you switch your viewpoint to that sort of viewpoint you will win way fucking bigger and
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you'll have way more fun because those people that you thought you hated will actually become some of
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your best fucking friends and you get to like hang out with them and talk strategy and be friendly and
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that's the one of the things that arte really taught me there's a number of other nutrition company
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owners i won't say their names because it's confidential but they own big companies that are in arte
00:20:50.780
and i teach them every motherfucking thing i know and some of these guys are literally in the exact
00:20:57.200
same space i'm in they sell the exact same shit they're you know because i'm in a lot of shit right
00:21:03.560
so it might be first form or it might be cannabis or it might be tequila or it might be might be might
00:21:08.880
be it doesn't matter there's a lot of dudes in there there are a lot of women who are in a lot of
00:21:13.680
competitive avenues and we share you know it's fucking cool dude and when you could take that energy
00:21:19.860
that we used to piss you off and you get hype about it bro it turbocharges fucking everything
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and that comes from intent you know i'm saying like you you they if you're one of these people
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that pretends to be hype for people when they win but in your heart you're still jealous i have never
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observed those type of people to win and and i didn't win when i pretended like when i used to
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pretend oh i pretend like oh yeah that's cool really you know i'm happy for him and really i would go like
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talk shit um i would lose then i and by the way when i used to do that that sort of behavior i was
00:21:55.600
broke then that's broke people shit that's how broke people think about shit so it's powerful
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shit man yeah so that wasn't even a question so you motherfuckers better share this show
00:22:06.120
i just throwing on extra all kinds of what's your favorite topping over there my favorite topping yeah
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i'm like ice i know you eat ice cream bro uh yeah um i mean i'm not really a topping guy like
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my shit mixed in you put like sprinkles and shit on there um i've been known to dabble in a little
00:22:21.560
caramel all right so dude that was just the caramel bro that was the caramel on the show i like it
00:22:26.120
you know i'm saying bro you know who always had good caramel fucking sundays with mcdonald's bro
00:22:30.180
yeah they had that soft serve shit with that could they still doing that oh yeah i haven't been to
00:22:34.220
mcdonald's i haven't eaten mcdonald's in 15 years oh yeah no they still do it yeah all right
00:22:39.800
question number three our third and final question what was the fucking caramel you better share the
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fucking show here's the cherry on top i think that's be a good one question number three for
00:22:48.560
some good shit bro yeah i love it i call it caramel on ice cream wait wait wait yeah so what's the
00:22:53.880
difference between pronunciation that's like tomato tomato yeah for sure really yeah or is it two
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different things no it's the same thing okay but if it's on ice cream i say caramel yeah if it's not
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on ice cream i say caramel really that's just me is that black people thing i think so is it i think
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so yeah actually really i think so i don't buy people like fuck yeah caramel it sounds a little
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sexier called caramel yeah you know i'm saying yeah a little toasted caramel all right question
00:23:23.520
number three our third and final question for you andy andy is it better to be perfect and late
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or good and on time come on dude come on dude be on fucking time all right it has nothing to do
00:23:37.420
it perfect and on time and that's a bullshit question that person you go back to fucking
00:23:42.840
preschool bro fuck that question be on time bro it's the basic shit you can do first of all it's
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respect all right people people think they're doing a power flex by like being a couple minutes late
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motherfucker be a couple minutes late for me do it i dare you yeah you'll never get a fucking
00:24:00.140
another text from me you'll never get another call from me you'll never get a fucking opportunity
00:24:04.040
with me fucking ever play that shit with someone who's real be on fucking time period where does
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that come from it comes from lazy bullshit internet shit yeah oh you you think you're more valuable
00:24:16.380
because you fucking are perfect and you relate i would kick your ass right out of this fucking
00:24:20.460
building would i not yeah yeah anybody who disagree with that y'all can fuck off with that shit
00:24:28.200
be perfect and on fucking time have some fucking standards that whoever wrote that's fucking need
00:24:33.820
some work i love it yeah i fucking love it it's a fucking truth no it is the truth man oh it's okay
00:24:41.040
if i'm a couple yeah so basically what you're saying is is you're you're okay with your own shortcomings
00:24:45.940
if you have other fucking things that are great how you justify that mental gymnastics they're fucking
00:24:50.200
genius the fuck out of here go that that motherfucker's working at starbucks i love it whatever the fuck
00:24:56.900
you're doing go work at starbucks because that's where you end up oh i make a great latte but i was
00:25:02.160
fucking late fucking loser ass shit oh man i fucking love that shit yeah i love it it's loser shit no it is
00:25:10.120
it is you can't be on fucking time oh your time's more valuable than fucking mine
00:25:16.760
i don't think so yeah be late here bro see that person couldn't cut it at this level we're the major leagues here
00:25:26.900
you know that's the fuck they're in the little leagues that's a little league question
00:25:31.060
be on time and be perfect and then you'll get an opportunity to play in the big leagues
00:25:37.160
i fucking love it man yeah guys andy that's all i got man that's three you better share that shit
00:25:44.380
went from sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a pole fuck a stove counted millions
00:25:51.780
in the cold bad bitch booted swole got her on bankroll can't fold doesn't know headshot case closed