REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 356. Opportunity Through Struggle Ft. Lewis Caralla

00:00:00.000 What is up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realists, say goodbye

00:00:20.940 to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking

00:00:25.540 reality. Guys, today we have a full length and it's going to be the full length as well.

00:00:32.520 Ha ha ha. I'm waiting for you to tell that joke, brother. It's a terrible joke. First

00:00:38.640 of all, you tell all the terrible jokes. We have a special guest. My standards, I was

00:00:43.360 below. Okay. Really? By your standards? The worst joke teller ever? Yeah. I've been saying

00:00:49.260 a lot. All right. Might have been not my best work. I'll admit that. Guys, if this

00:00:55.500 is your first time listening, we have multiple different formats on the show. Today we have

00:00:59.640 a full length show, which means we have an amazing guest, which I'm going to introduce

00:01:03.060 in just a minute. Sometimes when you tune in, we have Q and AF, which is where you submit

00:01:08.380 the questions and I give you the AF. You can submit those questions too. Email those in

00:01:13.800 guys to askandy at andyfriscilla.com. And then sometimes when you tune in, we have CTI, which

00:01:19.620 is cruise the internet. That's where we throw some headlines up on the screen. We talk about

00:01:23.380 what could maybe be true about them. Uh, we laugh a lot. And then we, uh, talk about

00:01:30.440 what the lesson is from a macro perspective for the society. And then in Q and AF and full

00:01:35.920 length and real talk, we talk about how we can individually be better, uh, to help solve

00:01:41.200 these problems. So this show is really like the peanut butter and jelly of how to fix the

00:01:45.280 freaking world. Uh, that's what we tried to do here. So today, uh, I am super excited about

00:01:50.780 the show because it's one that I've wanted to do for a long time. Um, I've got my friend,

00:01:56.560 uh, Lou Carella, who's made his way up here, who is the head strength coach for the, uh, for

00:02:02.300 Georgia tech. Um, you guys see me repost his content a lot. Uh, it's because it's amazing

00:02:08.500 content and he understands what it takes to build men of character to help the next generation

00:02:14.160 win and lead and be productive. And he's just a great dude. And, uh, I want to welcome him

00:02:19.300 to the show. So thanks for coming up, man. No, I can't thank you guys enough. This is

00:02:22.640 truly amazing. Dream come true for me. Um, you inspire me daily. I listened to you going

00:02:28.180 to work, going home from work. I just agree with everything you're trying to do. And I'm

00:02:33.160 truly honored to be sitting here with you guys in this actual studio. DJ gave me the tour.

00:02:39.460 I'm just, I'm blown away. I really am. I'm truly honored. And I'm going to give you everything I

00:02:45.100 have today. Yeah. Well, bro. Uh, we also have my brother, Sal here. Yeah. Yeah. Not trying to

00:02:51.700 leave you out there in the rain. Don't worry. I'd have made my way in. Yeah. Uh, look, man,

00:02:56.780 you know, Sal and I have shared your content back and forth for years. Yeah, it is the best. And I

00:03:01.960 remember the first video I ever saw of, of you speaking. And it was, um, you were telling the story

00:03:09.320 I remember exactly what the post was because it was so good because it's so true. It was, um,

00:03:15.880 you were talking about how winners will give everything that they have and still think they

00:03:22.580 didn't do enough and losers will do very little and they will think they, you know, did everything

00:03:28.300 they could. And, uh, that, that was just like that two second, three second clip. I knew right away.

00:03:35.640 I'm like, this is my kind of dude right here. You know what I'm saying? Because like, dude,

00:03:38.760 that is what it feels like. You know, it feels like we have two polarities of people, uh, in the

00:03:45.300 universe. And, you know, the producers of the world are, are doing so much and they're like,

00:03:51.220 what else can I do? I'm a failure. I'm this, I'm that, you know, you hear it all the time from

00:03:55.880 championship guys. You hear, you hear Michael Jordan talk about, you know, he talks about the,

00:04:00.320 the shots he missed, you know, the game winning shots he missed. And, uh, and, and then we,

00:04:06.220 we look at the other side of, of, of the scale and we have people who don't really do anything

00:04:11.440 talking about how tired they are, how frustrated they are, how exhausted they are. And it's like,

00:04:15.800 bro, what's going on? So we all know there's been cultural differences, uh, you know, and changes

00:04:23.040 that have taken place. You know, how old are you? 36. Yeah. So we're from the same generation,

00:04:28.440 essentially from when you and I were kids versus, uh, and Sal, uh, versus how things are now.

00:04:36.180 I mean, dude, you're, you're preaching the real stuff, man, the hard work, the grit, the fortitude,

00:04:42.080 the pushing through, um, what's it like out there right now? You know, kids get recruited and they're

00:04:49.260 told they're the best since they're freshmen in high school. And, you know, for me being the strength

00:04:55.000 coach, I'm with the guys more than any coach on staff. I'm with them year round. You know,

00:04:58.820 your body gets three days off and it has to work out again. Yeah. So we gotta, we gotta go,

00:05:04.820 but I have to know these kids well, but the whole point of this is I got to get through to them.

00:05:10.280 Yeah. And what is getting through to them before I even get to them is the fake stuff is the fakest

00:05:16.240 lies they've ever heard. Hey, I'm going to give you this. If you come here, Hey, uh, you don't got a

00:05:21.200 work car. You're going to start for us. Um, Hey, you're the best pick us over them. They can find

00:05:25.560 any leverage possible to persuade a kid to come to their school. And then they have to meet a guy

00:05:30.900 like me that's speaking foreign language and talking about discipline and toughness and work

00:05:35.140 ethic and accountability and winning and, and competing for a spot. It's, I got to rewire their

00:05:41.840 entire mindset, which is why I give them a message of the day. Every day they run every day. They lift

00:05:47.440 sometimes cameras are there. Sometimes it's not, that's not why I do it. Yeah. And I'm thankful

00:05:52.920 that they started because I would never know you and I would never have a platform like today

00:05:57.620 to speak about lazy people do a little work and think they should be winning, but winners

00:06:02.840 work as hard as possible. And so worry if they're being lazy. Yeah, dude, that was the clip and

00:06:07.640 it was amazing. Like, I remember you, I think you sent to me, Sal and you're like, dude, check

00:06:11.380 this dude out. I'm like, that's our dude right there. That's how we were always coached, bro.

00:06:15.200 Like I was coached that from the time we started playing soccer, we were probably what? Four

00:06:20.560 years old, four or five. Yeah. Up until, you know, I mean, dude, my dad's office is right

00:06:25.540 over there. Like if I go stick my head in there and be like, dad, I'm having a rough day. He's

00:06:29.320 going to be like, well, what the fuck? Like, you know what I'm saying? Like it's, it's just

00:06:34.620 always been that way. And, um, as you know, uh, you know, we here at the show have, have,

00:06:41.400 uh, dedicated a large portion of our lives to really trying to help, um, young people

00:06:47.520 understand what it actually takes. That's actually why I started the MFCEO project. You know, a lot

00:06:53.040 of people don't really understand that. Uh, Vaughn and I were doing a book and he was interviewing

00:06:58.420 me for a book and we started just talking and he looked at me one day. Um, and this is obviously

00:07:03.460 after we post these clips online, it got made fun of because we didn't have a podcast and I thought

00:07:07.920 it was corny to have a podcast. So I was like, ah, dude, we're writing a book. What are you talking

00:07:12.160 about podcast? That's for losers. And, uh, you know, so I didn't really, it wasn't this brilliant

00:07:17.780 idea. It was just an accident that happened. But I remember him looking at me one day and being like,

00:07:23.120 dude, you don't know how lucky you were to have a dad that taught you these things. And like,

00:07:30.060 that's whenever it clicked in my head instantly that I had an obligation to do what I've done for the

00:07:35.860 last eight years to, to help these young men and these young women coming up, understand what it

00:07:41.880 really takes. And, um, bro, you know, before we even get into the conversation of, of what we're

00:07:47.140 going to have today, I just want to commend you and say, thank you for doing this work because there's

00:07:53.020 not a lot of people out there doing the kind of work that you're doing in the way that you're doing

00:07:57.780 it. And, um, as consistently as you're doing it and dude, it's just, it's, it's super important.

00:08:03.040 It's much bigger than football. You know, a lot of these guys that are coming through your program

00:08:07.020 right now, you know, they have aspirations to play in the league and to do bigger things.

00:08:11.140 But I think if you go ask them in 20 years who had the biggest impact on them, they're going to say

00:08:15.880 you because you prepared them for competing in real life, you know, competing, uh, and, and, and,

00:08:22.180 and going out there in the real world and, and, and not just making it about athletics,

00:08:26.300 but making it about, you know, character and winning and teaching others how to win throughout their

00:08:30.640 lives. And, uh, bro, it's just, it's just really cool to, to, to have you here face to face. Cause

00:08:37.220 we're big admirers, man. It's amazing. Cause I feel the same way about you guys. I was talking

00:08:42.540 to you earlier. We speak the same foreign language right now. And that's called the truth. You know,

00:08:48.680 you, you have all these kids just believing these things are just going to happen and they're,

00:08:52.720 they're just going to be handed stuff. It's exactly the opposite of what's waiting for them at the end.

00:08:56.720 No, no one's there for them, man. No, no one's, no one's going to care about you when you get fired.

00:09:01.060 No, like people, you're going to lose loved ones. You got to know how to deal with that. Yeah.

00:09:05.360 So there's a lot of faith and you got to conquer doubt and you got to, I got to set them up to fail

00:09:10.940 so I can break them off and then bring them back. Yeah. Well, so they learn that lesson.

00:09:14.760 Yeah. That's right. And I think it's a valuable lesson to learn, especially when you've been told

00:09:18.560 for so long that you're so great because, you know, I think about when you start talking about the

00:09:22.920 truth, you know, the, the people that you find the most value in, and maybe not in the present

00:09:27.460 moment, but in your lifetime are the people who can deliver you the truth and people who will lay

00:09:32.920 you out a lesson that, you know, they don't like to hear it at the time, but when it comes, it's that,

00:09:37.200 oh fuck, he was right. Well, yeah. You know what I mean? And there's a respect there.

00:09:40.460 I always say the word truth is like a dodgeball. The last thing anyone wants to get hit with is the

00:09:44.680 truth and you just keep throwing dodgeballs at them and nailing them. Imagine with that dodgeball was hard.

00:09:49.800 That's right. You know what I'm saying? But that's, that's the thing. Those are the people

00:09:53.440 that you in life, you find the most value in are the people who are willing to deliver you the bad

00:09:58.320 news early and then train you to prepare it, to turn it into good news. And that's, that's, you know,

00:10:02.760 especially, you know, cause we, we all have similar roles, right? You're preparing young men for battle

00:10:07.960 in a sense, and we're preparing young men and women for life in the battle in a different environment,

00:10:12.220 but being able to get out in front of them, people, people ask all the time, like one, where do you find

00:10:17.100 these people too? How do you keep getting so many of them? We've hired 193 people in the last 18 months

00:10:21.360 and it's, you know, we've got them from all over the country and it's because, you know, when you

00:10:25.900 can, the people who step up for the challenge, right? But when you can deliver the truth and you

00:10:30.220 can deliver on the truth and then prepare these young people for battle life, you know, they find

00:10:35.020 a great deal of respect in it and they tell their friends, right? And they find that word of mouth,

00:10:38.680 say, Hey, these guys, you know, this, this is where I want to be. This is what I want to be a part

00:10:42.300 of. And it's not that they're these, the youth is lost completely. It's that you have to develop

00:10:47.120 that mindset to attract other people to come, you know, develop themselves.

00:10:50.980 And it's funny on the other side of truth is being coachable. Like, can you, can you accept

00:10:56.140 criticism? Can you take coaching? Because if your ego gets bruised every time you take a,

00:11:00.980 you take offense to someone trying to correct you, you're going nowhere. But if, if you are open

00:11:05.860 to improvement and you ask questions and you genuinely want to be coached, those are the people that go

00:11:11.120 the farthest. It's funny because, you know, when you, you start, you think back, like, no, it's

00:11:17.400 going, thinking about our strength coach. And I think about my head baseball coach in college.

00:11:20.820 And I think about, you know, all the things, a lot of things we do here and what I learned from

00:11:24.760 my college coach, I played baseball and he has since died. And, uh, one of the best men that I ever met my

00:11:31.280 whole entire life. And it's, it's interesting. Cause you, at the time I knew, like, I knew he was a good

00:11:36.480 man, but I never really quite understood what he was doing for me until 10, 12, 13. He's, you know,

00:11:42.260 he's since gone. And like, you start thinking about all the lessons that he gave me. That

00:11:45.940 motherfucker never told me anything good. You know what I mean? Like never. It was always the

00:11:49.580 truth. Like, and he was always, Hey, listen, you're doing well, but we got to look here.

00:11:52.660 And I remember thinking, cause you know, you are, you're a young athlete. You go play division

00:11:56.880 one sports. You've likely been the best player in your environment for the entire, then you get to that

00:12:00.580 division one locker room. You're like, Holy fuck. Like I'm actually not that good.

00:12:03.660 These dudes are all studs. Yeah. They're all big. That guy's bigger than I am. That guy throws

00:12:07.040 harder than I do. But Cal was always willing to have that uncomfortable conversation and truth.

00:12:12.380 And, you know, I, I can remember like, especially young in the younger version of myself, like,

00:12:16.200 dude, this guy even liked me, you know, like, is he, it's like, but now as I get older, you know,

00:12:20.100 I think about the conversations I have with some of the young guys and girls here, like, Hey,

00:12:22.720 I'm just telling you the truth, you know? And then, you know, God, it's so funny. Cal used to make us

00:12:27.180 clean the locker room and sweep the, sweep the dugouts every, we all had daily tasks and duties and it was not,

00:12:32.140 we didn't have a cleaning staff. And it's all those things that, you know, we've developed here

00:12:35.040 in some capacity, you know, Cal's played an integral role on. So I look at you and I sit

00:12:39.060 here and think, man, this guy's going to impact tens of thousands of men and change their lives.

00:12:44.240 If, if, if they choose to accept it that way, you know, and that's awesome. That means what you do,

00:12:48.040 like your time on earth fucking matters. And that's, I think that's cool. I think that's,

00:12:51.840 what's rad. I'll tell you this, I played college football and we talked about this in the car.

00:12:57.520 So, so my position coach, uh, my old line coach was also our strength and conditioning coach.

00:13:03.060 Right. And I, you guys were very, very similar, right? Like senior content, you guys were very,

00:13:06.860 very similar. What's your, how did you, how do you approach the team aspect and then know also

00:13:12.360 when to break it off and like, Hey, this kid needs a little bit more time. Like, how do you approach

00:13:15.620 those conversations, uh, with your individual players? How do you approach that?

00:13:20.520 Yeah. So I've had a chance to have four head strength jobs in five years and being a Georgia

00:13:26.760 Tech's the longest I've ever been anywhere, but every year there's new kids. So.

00:13:31.120 Yeah. Kids coming, kids leaving.

00:13:32.420 Kids coming, transferring now. Yep. So every year I was, I was, I was the new guy at three

00:13:37.040 different head jobs, like the only new guy on staff I got hired in. So my first month on the job,

00:13:42.140 I was just interviewing kids. I had 25 questions to ask them about their life. And I just, I'm typing

00:13:47.960 as they're talking and it's the most basic questions you could think of, you know, when's

00:13:52.380 your birthday? Who's your favorite athlete? But then you go deeper. What's the biggest obstacle

00:13:56.060 you've overcome and who's, who's the worst coach you ever had and why? Who's the best coach you

00:14:00.340 ever had and why? Tell me about the tattoos on your arm. Like all this stuff I can gather

00:14:05.020 from a kid and then I can read body language when he's not feeling good. And then I can see

00:14:09.680 when he's not reaching his goals. And then I, I know what's going on at home. So the individual

00:14:14.380 piece is everything, you know, you can't relate to one kid in a group. They don't hear you as much,

00:14:20.140 but if you pull them in your office, sit down with them and listen to him speak about stuff that

00:14:25.040 he's even been through, it's the most powerful thing I've ever done as a coach. And then the team

00:14:30.200 stuff just takes care of itself. Dude, you know, the thing is, and people don't realize this

00:14:34.420 because most, you know, most people have at least someone to talk about their struggles with,

00:14:42.260 you know what I'm saying? Like a lot of these younger kids, even younger kids that we've had

00:14:46.800 come work here, bro, they've never had anybody like ever, like sit there and like, like ever even

00:14:52.140 want to hear what they had to say. And, um, you know, I found over the course of time and of course,

00:14:58.320 you know, uh, I've got a long way to go to be a coach. You know, I think being a coach is something

00:15:02.860 that, you know, you're constantly learning how to be better at it. You know, I look back at how I was

00:15:08.260 10 years ago. I'm sure you feel the same way. And you probably like, damn dude, like I should

00:15:12.400 have been a lot better, you know? Um, but I look at, you know, some of these people and talk to

00:15:17.460 some of these people who, who haven't had anybody and dude, a lot of times all they're looking for

00:15:23.280 someone to like legit, like say, Hey dude, you got this in you. You know what I mean? You have this

00:15:29.040 in you. You're no different than anybody else. You know, society has this weird way of making us all

00:15:34.880 feel like we aren't qualified. Like we don't have it, you know, like I can remember in business

00:15:44.220 and even, even in sports, you know, I was a decent athlete and, um, I feel like everybody,

00:15:50.720 it always felt like it always felt like nobody really believed, you know what I mean? And, um,

00:15:58.140 and that's good for some people, right? Like some people that drives them. Like to me,

00:16:01.960 I have the mentality of, okay, don't believe me. Like I'm still going to go do it,

00:16:06.240 but not everybody has that. Cause not everybody's wired the same. And like, dude, I can think of

00:16:10.960 dudes right here in our company that like, had we not taken an interest in them,

00:16:16.320 would they even still be here? And these are guys who come in here at 23 years old, who

00:16:21.340 they're 26, 27 doing very well in life. And, um, you know, for those of you guys,

00:16:27.500 the point I'm trying to make here in a long winded way is for those of you guys in a leadership

00:16:31.620 role, whether it's a CEO, whether it's a manager, whether it's a coach, you know, don't underestimate,

00:16:36.600 uh, just talking to people, man, and finding out about them. You know what I mean? Because like,

00:16:42.080 dude, that shit can go a long way and it can produce, uh, a life-changing result.

00:16:48.480 Well, it's funny you say that. Cause you ask the simplest question sometimes get the deepest

00:16:52.420 answers that just go because nobody talks anymore. You just scroll on your phone, you text. And then

00:16:58.480 even when people ask you, Hey, how you doing today? You say good. And that's it. That's

00:17:03.520 your conversation. So so many people beyond the surface, it's just, it doesn't exist that

00:17:09.180 no one asks you the biggest things you've ever gone through in your life or even cares.

00:17:14.360 So when you have someone that does that, I think it's a game changer.

00:17:18.100 Well, I mean, God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason, right? Sometimes as you get

00:17:22.580 older, you're designed to listen, you know, you need to listen to people. But I, you know,

00:17:25.780 I always, I try to tell our sales staff all the time and really just our company in general is

00:17:29.820 if you want people to care about you, you got to care about them. And that's the, that's the

00:17:33.740 relationship that you have to understand that, especially with young athletes or young men,

00:17:38.360 really just young people in general, to your point, because they don't communicate well,

00:17:41.580 nobody's probably ever listened to their story. You know, nobody's asked them, Hey man,

00:17:44.940 like tell me a little bit about yourself a little deeper than the surface level questions. And I think,

00:17:48.220 you know, that's the competitive advantage as, as a young individual now, and really

00:17:52.260 for leaderships to, to manage young people is if you can learn to genuinely just give a shit about

00:17:57.160 them, like actually care about how they're doing, what they're doing, their life, their, their goals,

00:18:02.280 their aspirations, their struggles, you know, they will give, they will pour back into you tenfold

00:18:07.380 because nobody else in their life does that. And when we start at the basic level, I teach them

00:18:11.080 how to read, you know, we make them read a basic finance book. You know why? Because all young

00:18:15.080 people struggle with money, no matter what. And so if you can help them through the money problem,

00:18:19.520 they're saying, Hey man, this guy's got a little value to him. What else he got? You know,

00:18:22.680 next thing people, young people struggle with relationships. So ask them, Hey, how you doing?

00:18:26.140 How's your, Oh man, she broke up with me. All right, man. Like, how's your first time?

00:18:30.480 Yeah. I've been there. It sucks. So how many days you in, you know, but being able to listen and talk

00:18:35.300 them through that, it's a huge competitive advantage. But I mean, it's, it's actually pretty

00:18:39.580 fucking easy. Just care. Just simply care. I think that's a misconception too. Like I remember when I was

00:18:45.060 younger, I'm sure you guys remember too, but like, you know, you had older people tell you.

00:18:48.340 Aren't you like 19? Right. Well, I mean, when I was like fucking 17 though, people would tell you

00:18:53.640 like, Oh, you don't have any stress. You have nothing to worry about. You're just a kid. And

00:18:56.800 like, I think about it now. And it's like, you really look at it. Like these, these young people,

00:19:01.440 they, there's a lot going on. There's a lot of confusion, right? Like they're dealing with a

00:19:05.680 lot of shit that we didn't have to deal with. Yeah. Like, dude, there's a whole element to social

00:19:10.800 media that we didn't have to deal with as kids. Right. You know what I'm saying? Like there wasn't,

00:19:16.260 you know, there was bullying, right? Like you got bullied a little bit, you know, made fun of at

00:19:21.760 school or whatever. Everybody's been through that. Um, but like nowadays, you know, these kids are

00:19:26.600 fucking ruthless to each other, bro. They treat each other like shit. They're, they're in each

00:19:30.960 other's business. They're it's, it's just, it's, they're being told that they can be nothing and

00:19:35.900 everything at the same exact time. Yeah. It's a lot. It's a lot. So I mean, my, my question was like,

00:19:40.480 how do you, how do you approach that? Like peeling back that layer of reality to these

00:19:44.680 young folks? Like, how do you, how do you have that conversation? Right? Like everything you've

00:19:48.780 been told for the last 17 years of your life is not the truth. And maybe reality is a little bit

00:19:53.620 differently. Like, how do you approach those conversations? Just give them opportunities

00:19:57.580 to be tough. I mean, I write things that I don't think a lot of people even think of, like I write

00:20:03.900 things in workouts purposely to see how they're going to respond. And, and I'm never going to give a kid

00:20:09.200 a workout. I haven't done myself. And I always do it the morning before they arrive. It's the only

00:20:14.020 way I feel genuine when I talk to them after. So if we have a workout at six, I'm there at four.

00:20:19.140 I'm doing everything they're doing so I can relate to them so I can push them so I can coach them.

00:20:25.240 And I think a lot of people bark orders and they know they can never live that life. And that bothers

00:20:29.540 me. So these kids need a genuine example. They need someone to, you know, go into an office when

00:20:36.660 they're struggling because dad's in jail or mom just got arrested or the brother's not there.

00:20:41.640 There's so much stuff going on. Like you said, in their lives right now, they don't have anyone to

00:20:47.720 talk to. And then I just feel like provide them examples in real time, like time under pressure.

00:20:54.240 Like that stuff matters, man. Like I'll never forget the people that actually picked up the phone for me

00:20:59.540 when I had no one. No one answered the call anymore. Sure. And I get, I guarantee this.

00:21:05.520 We win a game on ESPN this year. My phone's blowing up. Right. When I get fired, no one's

00:21:10.260 calling. So like who was really there for you? I don't know, but I'm going to be there for them

00:21:16.860 year round, 10 years from now, 20 years from now. I don't remember the wins. I just remember that guy

00:21:22.780 that tried to pour into their heart. He gave all of his heart every day. And that's look, I'm going to get

00:21:28.120 replaced one day. I've been replaced several times. You can't replace the amount of effort

00:21:33.980 that I tried to put in to these kids' hearts. And that's, that's how you handle a team.

00:21:39.420 Is that what keeps you going every day? Like the 4am workouts? Like, I mean, when you wake up,

00:21:43.380 what, what, what gets Lewis out the bed? It's, it's being the example. It's, it's setting

00:21:49.280 the standard. It's being the standard. It's for my kids. Like I, I have three kids. Like anything I

00:21:57.560 post, I want them to see one day. I always think about that. And it's always just them in mind,

00:22:04.340 players in mind. And then if it helps other people, sure. But man, I just, I have so much

00:22:09.720 fire in my heart. I take a knee on the 50 yard line at four in the morning, me and that Atlanta

00:22:13.800 skyline. And I pray and I'm thankful. And I, and I'm thankful for this opportunity. Like that's how I

00:22:20.500 approach my day. And I'm running stadium sprints in the dark. I'm, it's just who I've always been.

00:22:25.720 Um, it's what I truly love. My, my alone time in that moment is where I think of all these

00:22:32.000 things that people see, you know, I do the best work in the dark and that's probably what I'm most

00:22:39.220 proud of. Dude, I think at the end of the day, that's what everybody has to be proud of. That's

00:22:43.860 why so many people are so unfulfilled because they don't do any of the work in the dark. They do all

00:22:48.400 their shit talking online or, you know, for a show or for an audience. And, you know, they don't

00:22:53.580 understand what it's like to be there at 4am or to be out in the middle of a fucking tornado doing

00:22:58.820 your cardio or whatever it is. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, that's the, I, I dude, I agree.

00:23:05.780 I'm like, for me, I'm the most proud of the shit that no one ever saw what I did. You know what I

00:23:10.300 mean? And, um, I don't know. I, you know, people, people say, you know, I think unjustly, you know,

00:23:20.220 people say, you know, these kids now they're soft or this or that. I don't think it's that dude.

00:23:26.280 I think that they've been misled. I think they'd have been told things that aren't true. I think

00:23:31.080 that, you know, I went to the Washington, uh, town and County fair this weekend, as I mentioned

00:23:36.580 yesterday on the show and dude, there was plenty of men there that are young, you know, I'm 20 year

00:23:41.740 old men. Um, it's not them. That's the problem. It's the people teaching them. That's the problem.

00:23:50.540 You know, we have to get back to a society where we equip our young people to achieve and win and lead

00:23:58.940 and create, because if we don't, there will be nothing in the future. And unfortunately,

00:24:05.060 you know, I didn't want to really get into political views, but I'll just say this.

00:24:09.900 I believe that's what they want. They want a subservient. They want a apathetic. They want

00:24:15.500 it unskilled. They want it unhealthy. They want it, uh, low ambition, uh, group of adults so that

00:24:22.800 we can all just kind of exist and they can do whatever they want. And, um, that's why I always

00:24:28.020 say, you know, personal excellence is the ultimate rebellion because dude, you know, when you have

00:24:31.920 personal excellence, you have the most extreme form of freedom that exists in this world.

00:24:38.520 Um, and nobody can really take that from you. You know, when you're willing to get up and do the

00:24:43.080 work and earn, uh, what it is that you have, no matter what, I don't think that, I don't think

00:24:49.860 the rules to the game has ever changed ever. Like it's still nature. It's to win. You have to be great

00:24:56.460 to win. You have to put in the work to win. You have to persevere. You have to endure. You have

00:25:01.760 to go through things. And, you know, we've convinced a younger society that somehow the

00:25:08.160 rules have changed. And so now we have a lot of people who are of the ages of under 25 that think

00:25:14.320 that eventually someday it's just going to all come together for them. And guys, that doesn't

00:25:19.680 happen. It doesn't happen like that. It doesn't just all come together. There isn't a magic time

00:25:25.360 where everything's going to align and your life is just going to become what it is you want it to

00:25:31.740 become. Like you should be designing that life right now. You should be thinking about what it is

00:25:37.440 that you want ultimately for yourself, for your future family that doesn't even exist yet, or maybe

00:25:43.320 it does exist. Okay. But like when I was young and I was, you know, 22, 23, 24, I had, uh,

00:25:53.640 the picture of what I wanted in my mind and I was working towards it. And like, dude, you know,

00:25:59.240 it ended up, I didn't end up having kids, but I always saw myself having a family and I wanted to

00:26:04.900 be equipped to do the things that our dad was able to do, like go to our practices and things like that

00:26:11.060 for them. So I knew I had to have some freedom. So I worked really hard then turns out that's not in

00:26:16.520 the cards for me and that's okay. But the, but at the end of the day, you know, that's how I thought

00:26:21.520 about it. And I think if everybody would just get back to thinking a little bit more about that,

00:26:25.740 instead of worrying about what's going on on Instagram or what's going on, you know, uh, on

00:26:31.220 Friday night, you know, you guys, you guys, there's more opportunity now to win and create and be

00:26:37.660 successful than there ever has been. Cause there's less people trying and which makes what you do

00:26:42.600 extremely important. You know, those kids, you guys that, that, that, that are on this man's team

00:26:48.720 that are a part of this program. I don't care if you make it to the NFL and become a, and become Tom

00:26:55.200 Brady, dude, the, the, the stuff that you're learning from this man in this program is the real shit.

00:27:01.660 It's the shit that will create your life. It's the shit that will, you're, you know, you'll be 40

00:27:07.080 years old or 45 years old. And you'll look back and say, damn dude, like I was lucky to have that.

00:27:13.940 Don't take it for granted, man. If you've got one of these people in your life, because, um,

00:27:18.380 the message just isn't being shared like that anymore. I feel like as a whole in our society,

00:27:24.380 it's just, it's just apathy everywhere we look. I mean, what do you think?

00:27:32.540 I completely agree. You know, I look at the opportunity I have is I'm given the key to

00:27:39.200 these kids, hearts and souls. Like that's the key I have in my hand every day. I'm with them.

00:27:43.900 So what I'm trying to do is give them the key to life. Like, yeah, if I got their heart,

00:27:49.180 I'm going to give them the key to life. And one of the biggest keys is one of the biggest pieces

00:27:53.520 of advice. I always try to tell them, make time for yourself. Like you say, you don't got time.

00:27:58.080 I mean, keep procrastinating, make time for yourself. If the work, like I said, I'll get

00:28:02.160 there at 3 a.m. I don't care, but I'm getting my time in because it's, if I can be self, if I can

00:28:09.760 be selfish at unselfish times, I can be selfless the rest of the day. Dude, that is it, bro. You

00:28:16.380 have to be selfish to even be selfless. People don't understand that. You know, there's all kinds

00:28:22.400 of people all over the world that are pouring themselves out when they can't even pour into

00:28:26.920 themselves. You know, like that's a huge deal, guys. Like in order for you to share, you have to

00:28:32.000 know. In order for you to know, you have to experience. In order for you to experience,

00:28:36.980 you have to go out and do shit and fall on your face. Okay. It's, it's a, it's a very,

00:28:42.820 very, very real cycle. And I think we've conditioned people to not go out and fail. You know, we're all

00:28:50.820 under the pressure of this microscope of social media all the time. You know, athletes, especially

00:28:55.740 you go out and you have one bad game and all of a sudden everybody's talking shit. Like, dude,

00:29:01.100 that's a lot of pressure. You know what I'm saying? But you have to understand what'd you

00:29:04.880 learn? What'd you, how'd you get better? You know, those hard times when you're down, those are the

00:29:09.860 times where you have an opportunity to look at the cracks in your game and, and seal them up, you

00:29:15.940 know? And that's, that's really what it's about, man. I think I take the word strength coach and

00:29:20.140 separate it. You got to have strength for your players in their weakest moments and then coach

00:29:24.340 them. Like I don't make plans to motivate our team after we win. That's easy. Like it's,

00:29:31.320 I don't have to do that. I have to plan for the worst case scenario that next Sunday morning when

00:29:37.600 they mope into the building, if we just got embarrassed, like that's, that's what I've

00:29:42.420 experienced in my coaching career. My playing career wasn't any different. Get hurt, get hurt.

00:29:47.660 Don't play, get lied to. Then all conference, then a captain, then a team MVP. My career,

00:29:55.300 get fired, get fired. National strength coach of the year. Like I've been kicked to the gutter

00:30:02.060 multiple times. And if I didn't ever have fire in my heart to keep me going because how much

00:30:07.560 sacrifice I made, how much discipline I've had where no one saw, how much care I had in my heart,

00:30:13.540 like I wouldn't have made it. And I wouldn't have made it if I never had good mentors.

00:30:19.640 I would never would have made it if I never believed in myself when everyone else stopped.

00:30:23.840 Like that's the point right now. Anyone, like you just said, you get beat up on social media,

00:30:29.100 man, hit back, hit back. Adversity has its way with everyone. Cause they never hit back.

00:30:34.580 They don't even think that's a, that's an option. You have to, it's coming for you.

00:30:39.760 Yeah. You know how you hit back, bro, by being better, by working harder, by improving your

00:30:46.180 skillset, by becoming better at your craft, whatever that may be. It's not hitting back.

00:30:51.560 It's not talking shit. Tom Brady doesn't get in the fucking comments and argue when he throws two

00:30:56.060 interceptions, the one time a year he does stuff. You know what I'm saying? Like what you do is you

00:31:01.220 look at it and you say, okay, what responsibility do I have in this? How can I improve? You take that

00:31:06.800 lesson. You apply it, you go get better and you win with your fucking actions.

00:31:10.820 And in his case, he throws eight touchdowns on Sunday. Yeah. But I mean, going back to your

00:31:15.260 point, I think, you know, I, you know, a lot of times we say, oh, well it's different now. It's

00:31:19.520 different. I don't know. I, I, I look at, you know, when you look at leaders, winners,

00:31:25.980 the thing they ask you now is, well, the kids now are different. Well, they've been saying that

00:31:30.100 shit for years. You know, the real winner in the game is going to figure out, okay, well,

00:31:33.500 all the cards are, you know, those guys are Nick Saban doesn't get a special subset of kids.

00:31:38.340 And then, you know, somebody, everybody else gets to pick from different sets of kids. Maybe that's

00:31:41.700 a bad example. Cause he does get a special, but you got a little special, but the point being is

00:31:45.360 like the real winners, no, I understand. But the real winners, they go out there and say, okay,

00:31:48.880 well, these are the cards I got to play. How the fuck am I going to play them? You know? And,

00:31:52.060 and this goes in business, you know, you have to say, okay, well, these are the kids that,

00:31:55.560 that we're dealing with. These are the young people we're dealing with. How do I figure out how to get

00:31:58.800 them to work towards what I want them to do, which is team unity winning, you know, personal

00:32:03.280 perseverance goals set. Like you have to figure out as a leader to go in there, connect with those,

00:32:09.040 those kids and progress them through life. If you fail to do that, somebody else, likely your

00:32:14.060 competition will figure it out and then kick the shit out of you. That's how this, that's how the

00:32:17.280 world has always worked. So going back to your point, it really hasn't changed. It's leaders as

00:32:22.120 they get older say, well, they're just different now. They're just different now. And there's a younger,

00:32:26.200 hungrier version of somebody who's willing to connect to those people are likely going to take your

00:32:29.860 lunch. They're going to come kick the shit out. Do we see it every day? How many of these young

00:32:33.040 people come in from these various athletic teams that are competitors, bro? Like they want to win,

00:32:39.340 they want to win a freaking checkers, right? You know, like dude, the, the, the willingness and

00:32:44.260 the ability to compete is innate. Like people have it. It's just beat out of you as it goes.

00:32:49.840 You know, like when you, when you take a one-year-old kid and you give him a little

00:32:54.360 Nerf basketball set and he actually gets the ball in the hoop, watch his reaction, dude. He knows it's

00:33:00.120 a good thing. You know, winning is a good thing. Winning is a noble thing because it sets an example

00:33:06.280 and a standard for other people to aspire to. And we've removed this from culture. We've removed this

00:33:12.240 through things like everybody's special. Everybody gets a trophy. Everybody deserves recognition.

00:33:18.920 And then when these kids get into the real world of reality, no matter what you want to say about it,

00:33:26.800 it's a competition. It just is dude. It's always going to be, and you can't legislate it. You can't

00:33:33.160 culture it out. The winners are going to win. They're going to be hungry. They're going to go

00:33:37.780 hard. They're going to, and you're competing with them whether you decide to or not. So it's much

00:33:44.320 better for you to accept that reality now and say, okay, I'm going to brush up my skills, dude. I'm

00:33:49.700 going to work hard. I'm going to do this. I'm going to give this. I'm going to give my all

00:33:53.200 and dedicate yourself to a lifelong progression of getting better because you'll always be in a

00:33:59.520 good spot. And not only that, like at some point in time, you've got to have the shitty conversation

00:34:04.360 with yourself, with somebody else, with somebody close to you. I just, I was briefly sharing this

00:34:08.420 with Andrew a little while ago, but so I have three kids, right? They're all within, for those of you

00:34:12.500 don't know, they're all within 14 months. And so they all like sometimes in sports camps, like a sports

00:34:17.220 camp will be, you know, for five and six year olds. And so they're all in the same little group. Well,

00:34:21.020 we had them in golf camp this summer. And so Sunday night was the awards banquet, which is

00:34:26.120 kind of cool. Actually, it was fun, but Enzo, my son, he wins best iron game, you know, out of

00:34:31.120 the little squad. And then I have identical twin daughters. Well, my little Isabella is pretty

00:34:36.900 good at putting, like she's got it figured out. So she wins the individual putting, the putting

00:34:40.840 contest. And then her and I win the father daughter putting contest. I'm a winner. You haven't figured

00:34:44.600 that out yet, but so then it leaves me with Francesca. Okay. So all my, my two other kids get to go up

00:34:50.880 in front of the, I'm talking about, you know, 40 people, 50 people. And my Francesca is looking

00:34:55.740 at my, and Franny is, I mean, she's my fire, man. Like she's going to, she will be, she's

00:35:00.000 the most competitive one. She will be super special one day. And she looks around and she's

00:35:05.180 like, well, I didn't get a trophy. And I, and then full on meltdown, full on meltdown.

00:35:09.700 And in my head, you know, in my whole heart, in my whole life, I'm like, dude, not every

00:35:13.020 fucking kid gets a trophy. You know, that's bullshit. And in that moment of life, I was like,

00:35:17.300 Oh, who's got a trophy. Yeah. I know why they gave in because I was like, Holy shit. Like,

00:35:25.600 and if I wasn't wired, you know, to be the way I am, I would say, Hey, listen, we got

00:35:28.560 to find her a trophy. And instead in front of all those people, she's freaking out.

00:35:31.740 I had to get down on my knees. And I looked at her and said, Hey, listen, here's the deal.

00:35:34.940 You're not always going to get a trophy. And she's, she's four, it's going to be five

00:35:37.880 in 10 days. And I said, and that's just the way it is. Like, you're going to have to work

00:35:41.400 a little harder. You were out there in a green, you weren't, you were messing around.

00:35:43.820 You were, you were playing and those, they were working to get better and they were

00:35:47.360 paying attention. They were working hard and they were, they were competing. You

00:35:50.140 weren't, that's just the way it was, you know? And, and I know you don't like this,

00:35:53.460 but remember this. And I, here I am with my little, you know, five-year-old girl. I'm

00:35:56.020 sure the parents next to me, my left and right are probably like, look at this fucking

00:35:58.560 psycho, but I'm preparing my five-year-old daughter for life because that's just what

00:36:03.060 it is. That's the truth. You know, I agree. I have a nine-year-old son and he's very

00:36:07.460 competitive and travel baseball right now. And I love it because I remember when he

00:36:12.620 played rec ball and the rules were simple and everyone was just having fun and everyone

00:36:17.500 got a trophy, but then he went to travel ball. I mean, he was batting ninth, had to

00:36:23.360 like fight his life off to even make the team. And I love that. Like, I love that he

00:36:28.520 didn't get his way. I love that if he made a mistake, he got benched. Like I love that

00:36:33.360 he had to make plays to prove the coach that he was worth it at that age. And now he's

00:36:39.320 working out. I'm walking in on him, doing pushups and sit-ups and trying to outwork

00:36:43.560 people.

00:36:43.940 Hitting off the tee.

00:36:44.500 Yeah. Hitting off the tee in the yard. Yep. So I think that's got great value. But

00:36:48.140 to your point, don't run from competition. Don't run from discipline. Don't run from

00:36:52.680 things that are tough. Don't run from obstacles. Because if you run from obstacles and if obstacles

00:36:58.800 aren't your thing and if roadblocks you don't like, well, you don't like being great

00:37:03.400 either. You don't like being elite.

00:37:05.440 I would even, I'd take it further. You like being subpar. You're going to have to get

00:37:09.800 uncomfortable. You're going to have to deal with a whole different kind of roadblock or

00:37:13.680 uncomfortable situation. You know, that's the thing people don't really talk about

00:37:17.540 enough. It's not like if you don't try hard, you get to live this good life. Like

00:37:22.500 that's not, that's not the fucking alternative. Like the alternative is if you don't work

00:37:28.180 hard to develop skills and put in the time to be great, not only will you not be

00:37:32.400 great, you won't be good. You're going to be fucking poor. You're going to probably be

00:37:36.940 unhealthy. You're going to probably live in a really place, a place you don't like.

00:37:40.820 You're probably going to live there with somebody you don't like. You're probably going to drive

00:37:44.320 shit you don't like if you even get to drive anywhere, bro. Like this, this is what people

00:37:48.980 don't talk about. It's not like, oh, I, I, I can opt out. Like you can't opt out. Like

00:37:56.700 it's going to be hard either way. It's either going to be hard because you're putting in the

00:38:00.260 work every fucking day to get better, or it's going to be hard because you're going to suffer

00:38:03.520 in a different way. And like, you know, that is real. That is real shit. So like, if you think

00:38:10.520 like, Hey, I'm good where I'm at right now, you might be good where you're at right now,

00:38:14.760 but everybody else continues to move and you stay the same. That means you go backwards.

00:38:19.540 And this is a, this is a perspective that you have to, you have to be a certain age with a

00:38:26.020 certain experience to understand, because how many people have you guys seen? I'm pointing at

00:38:31.720 Sal and Lou. How many of you guys seen that say, Hey, you know what? I'm good. But then you look

00:38:36.860 back 10 years later and their life is fucking disaster because they gave up 10 years ago.

00:38:42.920 And so like, no matter where you are, you could be someone right now who's 40 years old,

00:38:47.300 listening to this and you're saying, well, it's too late for me. No, it's not because we're always

00:38:52.840 progressing. The world's always moving. So dude, you have to look at the positives. What are the

00:38:58.020 positives? You could make decisions right now about your health. You can make decisions right now about

00:39:03.320 your movement. You can make decisions right now to drink water instead of fucking super, super

00:39:09.380 swole size Cokes, you know, like bro, uh, there there's all sorts of things that we're actually in

00:39:16.320 control of that people don't want to look at because they require effort. And that effort

00:39:20.620 is far less painful than what you're going to experience. If you don't do the effort,

00:39:26.540 you know, and that's the thing. And this is for anybody, bro. This is for you, DJ. This is for

00:39:31.800 you guys in this room. This is for you guys listening. No matter where you are in life,

00:39:36.540 you can change your life so fast. You can get better so fast. You can make drastic changes so fast

00:39:44.700 that the rest of your life that was suffering won't even matter to you anymore because you'll

00:39:49.900 feel so much better now. And like, dude, it doesn't like, I just wish, I wish I could implant

00:39:55.880 this in everybody's head because if I could, the world will fix itself in literally like a hundred

00:40:00.940 days because dude, in a hundred days, you can, you can make so much progress in terms of your mental

00:40:08.800 strength and your fortitude and your discipline that you create and cultivate the belief in

00:40:15.620 yourself. You may be 600 pounds in a hundred days, maybe you're 500 pounds. So you still got a lot of

00:40:21.440 work to do, but you can get that mental in the right spot where you know you're on the right track.

00:40:26.800 Your life will feel and look and be completely different, completely different, but they don't

00:40:33.440 want that shit, man. I always try to say this exact same thing you're saying. I give the kids on the

00:40:38.740 team, every team I've ever been with the hunger board and the hunger board is graded by our strength

00:40:44.520 staff every week in the off season, alphabetical order. We go down the list and we say, all right,

00:40:50.840 so-and-so, is he satisfied, hungry, or starving? And that is strictly just based on the kid's effort.

00:40:57.740 It's got nothing to do with his playing ability. It's got nothing to do with his talent.

00:41:01.060 It has everything to do with, does this kid want it? Does he help people get better around him?

00:41:07.120 Because if he's satisfied, he's good with where he's at. He's not trying to improve. If he's hungry,

00:41:11.580 he's going to do exactly what I asked him to do, but no more. But if he's starving,

00:41:16.880 that dude's there on Saturday morning when the weight room's not even open.

00:41:19.820 That dude is getting everyone around him better. And it goes to every category of your life,

00:41:24.320 coach, dad, husband, CEO, whatever it is. You're either satisfied, hungry, or starving

00:41:30.500 in every category of your life. And people need to start grading themselves more.

00:41:34.220 Well, dude, and you have to recognize also, guys, first of all, I do this shit because I love you,

00:41:40.220 motherfuckers. Okay? You come on here, you guys think I'm being mean. I'm not being fucking mean.

00:41:44.300 I'm trying to help you. All right? All of you have this power to improve inside of you,

00:41:49.440 and you have to quit allowing yourself to acclimate to a shitty situation. Okay?

00:41:55.580 I understand. I was that person who was okay living below what I actually wanted. I've gotten

00:42:04.180 used to that before in my life. It's not like I never experienced that. It was like a lot of

00:42:09.240 people think, oh, sometimes these guys that run hard or run fast or intense, they're always been

00:42:15.560 that way. That's not true. That's not true. It's a conscious decision. You have to look around and you

00:42:21.460 have to say, dude, I'm not fucking accepting this as my life. I am not accepting this. And you have

00:42:27.620 to mean it. And dude, that will turn something on in you if you could get to that point. And I think

00:42:33.820 a lot of people can't get to that point because of what we said initially. They've never had anyone

00:42:38.700 tell them that they even have the potential to do this. You know, everybody's told growing up

00:42:44.620 success is for other people. Well, not really. We're told when we're little, you could be anything you

00:42:50.380 want. Then as we get older, we're fucking laughed at for saying we want to be something cool. Right.

00:42:56.280 Right. You got to be realistic now. That's it. And they start backing it down and they're backing

00:43:00.640 down your expectations because they don't believe in you because they don't believe in themselves.

00:43:06.260 But who are all these people that make shit of their lives? Have you ever driven up and down the

00:43:12.840 coast of the ocean or the nice neighborhood of a city? There's thousands upon thousands upon

00:43:19.060 thousands upon millions of people doing very well in life. How the fuck can you look at me and tell

00:43:26.860 me that you don't have what it takes to be one of them? You're choosing to acclimate to a lesser

00:43:33.960 standard and you have to snap out of it. And I'm sorry, no one's ever come along and said,

00:43:39.580 Hey man, you have it in you, but you do have it in you. You just have to choose to see things for

00:43:47.220 what they are. And you have to choose to invest in the skill sets that are going to be required to

00:43:53.380 get you from here to there. It is very simple. Okay. So think about this. Look around at your

00:44:00.680 life. Are you satisfied? Is this the life you want for the next 20 years? Are you willing to live a life

00:44:07.080 50% less than what you're living now in 20 years? Because that's what you'll have if you don't start

00:44:12.660 working now. All right. So think about it, dude. It's important shit. I always say, guys, are you

00:44:21.820 tired yet? Like, are you tired? And I'm never, I'm never talking about conditioning. I'm never

00:44:26.340 talking about bending over when it's too much. I'm talking about, are you tired of your habits right

00:44:31.580 now? Are you tired of your results right now? Like, cause in my career, I got tired of watching other

00:44:36.720 people succeed in a job that I knew I could do very well and very passionately, but I'm sitting over

00:44:44.620 here getting fired and they're getting all theirs over there. Like that bothered me. It bothered me

00:44:50.060 so much to the point where I did get tired. And then all of a sudden I found myself in a place that

00:44:57.940 I believed I belonged. And, and that was the point I was just trying to make to the team.

00:45:04.100 Look, if nothing's going to change unless you change. And if you don't change, don't get mad

00:45:11.180 at your situation. Don't get mad at what's going on here. Don't get mad at the people leaving you.

00:45:16.100 Like it doesn't matter who believes in you. If you believe in yourself, if you do the work alone,

00:45:21.920 if you wait till those lights turn off to do your most impressive work, that's how you're going to

00:45:27.260 make it. Well, and you have to have, you have to develop that skillset of self-awareness.

00:45:31.720 You know what I'm saying? You've got to be honest with that work.

00:45:34.100 You know, it's not, well, I'm doing the work when no one's looking, but you're not really doing the

00:45:37.060 work, you know? And I think that's the piece that, you know, you got to be extremely honest and clear

00:45:41.360 with the plan that you have out in front of you. You know, going back to your thing, like life is

00:45:45.260 very much like a tree. You're either growing or dying. The second you stop growing, you're dying.

00:45:49.080 And that's when you were talking about the proverbial wave of people passing you by.

00:45:52.240 Yeah. And we have the opportunity in front of us every day to continue to grow. It's whether you

00:45:56.880 choose to take that pathway of growth and that growth is uncomfortable. And that's what,

00:46:00.280 that's the, the self-awareness phase that you got to really be, you got to say, okay, like,

00:46:03.980 am I getting uncomfortable today? Because that uncomfortable place is where you need to be

00:46:06.960 because that's where the growth is happening. That's where the development is happening. And

00:46:10.720 you know, a lot of times when you start talking about, excuse me, going back to the swathlings,

00:46:15.360 I was going to say something, you know, you know, going back to, you know, the piece where,

00:46:19.480 um, you know, you, you, you talk about these, these kids that struggle, these kids that are told

00:46:25.840 they're going to be everything throughout their life. Well, what happens is their life up until

00:46:30.180 that point, because of their talent, whatever it may be has been relatively easy because they've

00:46:35.200 been gifted this talent. And what happens is you, you know, that's natural for them, whether it's

00:46:40.200 size, whether it's strength, whether it's speed, whether it's, you know, football acumen or

00:46:44.160 something like that, or just sport acumen, but they stop matching their work ethic or their,

00:46:50.780 their talent with work ethic. And eventually the kid next to them will outwork them. And then they

00:46:54.300 have to, then they have to develop a skillset of work ethic at 19, 20, 21, 22 years old. And it's

00:46:59.500 not something they know. It's not something they understand. Now they start to lose. Now it's

00:47:04.240 something they really don't know. Then they start to beat themselves up. Then they start to go down

00:47:07.780 this dark path and you, you wasted a great deal of talent because the kid's never been told the truth

00:47:11.600 of working, uh, of struggling of, you know, of signing up for the, the continue to growth pattern.

00:47:17.060 That's where these kids slip into a dark, you know, deep, dark pathway. And I think, you know,

00:47:21.180 it happens in life with talent without here is, you know, you, you have to be under the realistic

00:47:27.500 understanding that at some point in time, you know, the ugly ball is going to find you. And that's

00:47:32.220 why I love sport. I love sport because like, man, if you, if you're not putting the work, you're not

00:47:35.660 taking the extra ground balls, you're not out there doing what it is. Like sports has an unbelief. So does

00:47:39.600 life has an unbelievable karma train that fucking rolls out, you know, and that ball, you know,

00:47:43.980 because you're not putting in the work because you're not a good locker room guy or you're not

00:47:47.060 putting in the strength coach, like that touchdown ball in the corner in the fourth quarter with three

00:47:50.440 seconds left and you're in the corner, you're going to drop it. And sport hat life too. Sport has an

00:47:55.080 unbelievable way of showcasing this on Saturday night highlights and Sunday night sports center and

00:47:59.680 things like that. But if you can peel that back and look at your life, so does your life. Just not

00:48:04.160 everybody sees it. You'll see it though. If you're on, if you're honest with yourself,

00:48:08.220 yep. I always say the, uh, the no talent code. I've talked about this a bunch with the guys.

00:48:15.640 I got a piece of a pie that split up in eight pieces. Talent's one of them. The other, the other

00:48:22.420 stuff that's life. Yeah. And if they don't, if they don't understand those other seven pieces that go

00:48:28.040 with talent, the talent's going nowhere. And that's the truth. I mean, the things that take,

00:48:33.040 there's lots of talented people out there that nobody's ever heard of.

00:48:38.220 Ever. There's the most talented people, in my opinion, probably have never even been heard of,

00:48:43.580 bro. You know what? You know why the people who are listening don't know why though. The reason

00:48:48.040 most people have never heard of the most talented people is because the most talented people have

00:48:52.520 relied exclusively on their talent and they never developed any of the skills that take them past

00:48:57.060 the talent. And like Lewis is saying, talent is only one little piece of the pie. It's not enough.

00:49:03.940 It never will be enough. You have to develop all the skills that go with it and amplify it.

00:49:08.920 And most people that have a God gifted talent are not, they don't have anybody that comes along and

00:49:15.920 says, Hey, you know what? You're pretty good. Like Tim Grover with Michael Jordan. Okay.

00:49:21.140 You know what? You're pretty good, dude, but you could be better here, here, and here, and here.

00:49:26.600 You don't hear that shit. Tim does that shit for me too, bro. You know what I'm saying?

00:49:32.000 We all need, we all need people to, and, and fundamentally we should all understand that

00:49:37.020 those of you out there who are, happen to be gifted with, with something.

00:49:41.060 Um, if you don't put the work behind it, it's, it's a flash in the pan. You know, you'll be cool

00:49:46.960 for a two years and then you'll be gone. I was about to say, like, we know, we know those guys who

00:49:51.660 we just saw one at the County fair. It's a guy that's still throwing, uh, throwing at the little

00:49:55.360 fucking, uh, the, the guy throwing his arm out at the fucking baseball. It's a guy that fucking dust

00:50:00.360 off that letterman every fucking Saturday night at this fucking pregame, you know, throw their football

00:50:04.580 over the mountains. It's still falling, right? Let me, let me ask you guys this though. Cause I mean,

00:50:08.720 we talk about self-awareness, what do you, how, like, what, what do you think, what do you guys

00:50:12.540 think is, is the best, I guess, method or what steps, uh, can somebody take a young person to

00:50:18.960 truly become more self-aware? Like what actionable steps do you guys, have you guys taken that you

00:50:24.200 think will get somebody closer to be self-aware? I have a golden rule of thumb. You can measure it,

00:50:28.380 you can manage it. You know, if you, if you just blatantly go out and say, well, I did good today.

00:50:33.960 You will, you'll lean on the side, you'll err on the side of failure because you're,

00:50:37.340 you're most people, when it comes to actually grading yourself, you're going to give yourself

00:50:41.280 a higher score than you're going to earn. And that's what I've learned, you know, managing

00:50:43.980 hundreds of people. But if you can measure it, you can manage it and you can compare it to everybody

00:50:48.620 else. And that's why, just like what we do, if you track your food every single day, it's an,

00:50:54.760 it's a non-arguable thing. You cannot argue. I can go back and look at your food log, anybody in

00:50:59.400 the app over the course of the last six weeks, I can tell you if you won or lost. Now you'll say,

00:51:03.980 oh, I'm doing well. Okay. Well, I'll go and look at it and say, well, how well are you doing?

00:51:07.000 Right.

00:51:07.420 Because my version of well and your version of well might not be aligned. Right.

00:51:10.040 But if we have numbers and things that we can actually measure them against,

00:51:13.300 we can progress the win. You know what I mean? We can progress the self-awareness.

00:51:16.760 Oh, this is the whole exact thing, how the power list works. The power list works by,

00:51:20.660 by metrifying the, the, your, your life wins. Like it makes it, it gamifies it,

00:51:27.720 makes metrics out of it.

00:51:28.700 Yeah, no, I mean, but my point being is like, whether that's sales, like for our guys and

00:51:33.700 girls here, whether it's touch points, whether it's whatever, if you can measure it and you can

00:51:37.860 figure out how to peel it back into your life, you can manage it. And so the self-awareness then

00:51:42.040 doesn't become what you think of yourself. It becomes the real world example of what the

00:51:45.960 fucking test score is. You know what I mean? The real world example. And I think that's why I love

00:51:49.840 the tracking of the food because it's an undeniable measurement. You can't say, well, I'm eating well

00:51:54.800 and what the program doesn't work for me. You know, it's kind of like measuring, you know,

00:52:00.240 this is why they have one rep maxes. Well, dude, they have fucking perfect. Listen, dude,

00:52:04.740 society for like the average citizen and like the reality, there's examples of it all the time.

00:52:11.440 Like the reality of winning is major league baseball player. Does he get paid on his potential

00:52:18.760 or does he get paid on his statistics? Right. What do they say? They say, oh, well,

00:52:23.940 you did this, this, this, this, this. And so we think you'll keep doing this. So we're going to

00:52:28.360 give you a whole lot of money. You have to prove it. It has to be real. Like that's the reality,

00:52:33.980 bro. Like you have to be excellent to win. And we're teaching our kids all these other nice fluffy

00:52:42.720 things about life, but not teaching them the most fundamental reality, which is if you want to win,

00:52:49.000 you have to be good and not good. You have to, if you want to win bigger, you've got to be more skilled

00:52:53.220 and great. Like there's levels to it. You know, like people say, oh, well, there's levels of this.

00:52:58.100 Well, there really is, you know, there's, there's real metrics of performance, like that you are

00:53:05.020 measured by in real life. And that's why people have such a hard time comprehending like why their

00:53:11.340 life looks X when they want it to be, you know, a hundred X, you know what I'm saying?

00:53:17.360 I think the same thing. It's, I always laugh when guys say from a coaching side, this is what I

00:53:22.620 think. When coaches say, oh, he had it all and he blew it. No, man, he didn't have it all. He didn't

00:53:29.120 have it all because he didn't have someone pouring into his life about how to fail, how to have a face

00:53:33.860 a setback in general, how to come back. Like the bounce back is so much more powerful than the

00:53:39.780 knockdowns in life. I mean, these kids don't learn that though. They don't have anyone teaching them at

00:53:44.720 all setting them up to fail and bounce back. It's going to be tough because on the other side of

00:53:50.440 this whole thing is resilience is coming back is getting beat down. Like you always talk about

00:53:57.180 and finding a way if it matters to you, if, if the bills have to be paid, if the family has to be

00:54:05.220 taken care of, what are you going to do? Like that's the stuff that has to be poured into people

00:54:10.820 right now before they get out there and it's all waiting. But I think that's, again,

00:54:15.700 it goes back to the leadership thing, like in business, right? That coach doesn't want to take

00:54:18.880 self-reflection and say, well, you know what? I missed my opportunity there. I actually failed

00:54:21.500 that kid. You know what I mean? I failed him and he, you're right. He had all the talent that he

00:54:25.840 needed, but I lacked the talent to get him where he needed to go. And they don't like to look at that

00:54:29.760 piece because there's, there's a mirror involved. That's right. You know, and I think that again,

00:54:33.900 when you took, look at self-awareness as a, as an individual, the mirror's involved,

00:54:37.400 you got to like really look back and say, okay, well, why am I not winning here? Or why did that,

00:54:41.800 why did, why did that person not succeed? A real, a real man would say, well, because I failed him.

00:54:48.220 That's right. I failed him. And because I possess the knowledge to be able to coach that person to

00:54:53.180 where they need to be. And that person wouldn't be in that position if I didn't see value in the

00:54:57.300 tools and skillsets that they had. So it's easy for me to say, well, it's his fault. It's hard to say

00:55:01.900 it's my fault. And I think that's a lesson in life that you have to recognize and leading by example and

00:55:06.520 understand, okay, well, Hey, what's my role here? Well, my role is that I fucking failed.

00:55:10.700 And how do I put metrics into place? So I don't fail as often as regular in the future,

00:55:16.140 because you're going to fail again. You know, I think that there's a whole nother chapter,

00:55:19.260 like you don't just fail once. There's a bugging infinite train of that fucking getting kicked in

00:55:24.880 the nuts thing. It doesn't stop, you know, but what happens is you don't like failing. You just become

00:55:30.100 better at responding to it and being, becoming more resilient from it so that you learn to rebound a lot

00:55:34.660 faster. So you don't get in those ruts. Like when you're in those ruts, man, after you get your

00:55:37.740 nuts kicked in that first few times, it's hard to get out. It's a long, it hurts. Not only hurts it,

00:55:42.900 dude, it feels like it's forever. Yeah. Dude. I think it was also, dude, there's a lot to be said

00:55:47.520 for people who, you know, don't even get in the game and get kicked in the nuts. You know, like,

00:55:53.960 uh, those are always the people with the most to say about this, by the way. Monday morning

00:55:57.800 quarterback. That's right. Like you guys out there who are trying to achieve shit,

00:56:01.660 just understand that that you're, you're, you're fighting human nature. It's not going to stop

00:56:06.780 people who don't do things, love to fucking bring down people who are doing things. They will find

00:56:13.320 every single thing they will find. They will judge you for every detail, even when they are not perfect

00:56:19.520 themselves or even guilty of the same exact shit. They're going to go back. Sometimes they'll

00:56:24.260 accuse you of shit. Just that pretend like they're not guilty. Right? Like dude, the smoke screen.

00:56:29.000 Yes. Look at him. Yeah, bro. That's half the fucking cancel culture shit. The reason so many

00:56:37.020 people want to jump on is because they're guilty of it. They don't want to look like it. Everybody

00:56:40.680 fucking knows that. But the point is, is that dude, if you're going to be somebody, whether it

00:56:45.360 be in business, whether it be just a, just an outstanding dad, uh, who like, you know, you don't

00:56:51.800 have to, this is not about being rich. This is just about being a high quality individual,

00:56:55.480 high standards. Like if you're going to be a high quality dad who keeps his body in shape,

00:57:00.020 you're going to deal with people that don't like it. Like, you know, if you're a, if you're a woman

00:57:05.060 who takes care of herself and gets all her shit done and achieves at a high level, you're going

00:57:09.640 to hear about it from other people. This is just the reality of humans. People do not understand

00:57:15.300 what it's like to get kicked on or piled on or what it's like to, to be destroyed after you drop

00:57:22.080 the touchdown pass and the winning game, because they never even been in a fucking practice.

00:57:26.660 They never even been in a fucking practice. So you can, you can only give these things so much

00:57:32.280 value as to what it can do to improve your game. Could you have fucking actually ran the route a

00:57:38.200 little bit better when they say you ran a shitty route? If the answer is yes, run a better route.

00:57:44.100 You know what I'm saying? Like if you fucking need to put your hands in a different position to

00:57:47.540 catch the ball next time and dudes on the fucking stands are saying, Hey, your hands were in the

00:57:52.000 wrong position. You don't tell them fuck off just because they're in the stands. You take what

00:57:55.740 they offered you and you say, you know what? I can improve there. And you make the improvement

00:57:59.420 and you move the fuck on. But I think there's a value here though, too, is like, you know,

00:58:04.040 you don't take relationship advice from somebody who's in a relationship you don't like. You don't

00:58:07.180 take business advice from somebody who doesn't run a fucking business or doesn't have a good business.

00:58:10.780 No, for sure, bro. Yeah. Don't take a business. Don't take a, you got to consider the source.

00:58:15.320 That's exactly right. Yeah. But if there's even like, bro, even a broken clock's right twice a day.

00:58:20.180 So like, even if the source is bullshit, but they're offering you a way to get better,

00:58:25.040 you should be thankful that you got to see it, even though it hurt because now you're better.

00:58:29.580 Now you're going to go be better. You know, that's exciting shit. Um, you know, I, I think

00:58:36.420 people nowadays, you know, they're so quick to, to want to be the victim and, and bro, do I agree

00:58:42.360 with the cancel culture shit? No, dude, it's, it's ridiculous. It ruins lives. Like it's mentally

00:58:47.620 fucked up. You know how many times I've had people accuse me or pile onto me just because

00:58:52.740 they don't like the shit I say on the show, bro, a hundred times, maybe more a week.

00:58:58.720 Yeah. But like the, yeah, but the point is, is that like, there are people out there who

00:59:07.040 have completely changed their lives and there's people that are become, you're going to do

00:59:11.980 by going on this journey of being better and dealing with the resistance and holding

00:59:16.200 yourself to a higher standard. The, the good that you are going to do is going to be 1000

00:59:24.280 X those little comments, or even when the whole entire world hates you for a few days, the

00:59:30.620 good that you do will outweigh that by a thousand times. So don't cower away from the opportunity

00:59:36.380 to be who you want to be because dude, the world needs winners. The world needs doers. The

00:59:42.260 world needs people who accomplish because without those people, there is no hope for everybody

00:59:47.700 else. There is no inspiration for everybody else. There's no story for everybody else to

00:59:53.500 follow. Okay. It's your duty to build something out of your life. If for no other reason, you

01:00:00.780 have to be the example of what the fuck is possible. I feel that personally as an obligation.

01:00:06.180 That's maybe it's just me. I don't know. But to me, we start talking about America and

01:00:12.620 we start talking about duties and we start talking about what's going on in the world.

01:00:16.420 It all comes back to the things we're talking about now, because we were given this opportunity

01:00:23.260 in this free country to create an amazing life. And as hard as it may be, and it's going

01:00:29.800 to be harder for some people than it is for you. It's going to be less hard for other people

01:00:34.080 than it is for you. But we still all have this opportunity to move forward and create

01:00:40.340 something. And it is our duty to do so, so that the little bitty kids that you see running

01:00:46.220 around that make us all smile and laugh, have someone to point to like we did when we were

01:00:51.580 kids and say, we're all going to be like that. That's what this is about, dude. That's what

01:00:56.540 this is always about.

01:00:57.720 That's right. It's the same things that you're saying. I think the higher the level,

01:01:04.380 the higher the devil. And I think anything you do, what you're shooting for the stars,

01:01:09.720 people are going to try to burn you up along the way. And look, one of my favorite quotes

01:01:15.460 is haters will see you walk on water and say it's because you can't swim. They will find

01:01:19.580 anything to say, no matter how much good you're trying to do, they will find it. And the last

01:01:26.460 thing I'll just say on this piece, because I always tell the guys, if you're going for

01:01:31.720 something big, if you have a big dream, bring an umbrella because a lot of people are going

01:01:37.480 to try to water down what you're capable of. And they're not going to want you to succeed.

01:01:41.540 No one wants you to reach your potential that hasn't reached theirs.

01:01:44.720 Makes them feel uncomfortable.

01:01:45.660 That's right.

01:01:46.220 More uncomfortable.

01:01:47.060 They're going to bring you back down to their level just to make them comfortable. Exactly.

01:01:50.300 And you're going to create waves. No one wants you to get in their boat and create

01:01:55.840 waves. But if you're a difference maker, if you genuinely want to make a difference in

01:01:59.860 this world, you're going to. You're going to make waves in a boat. People aren't going

01:02:05.000 to like that.

01:02:05.780 You're going to make waves just by shining different, just by the way you talk, by the

01:02:10.600 way people like you. Like, dude, there's people out there that hate me just because

01:02:15.640 other people like me. It doesn't have nothing to do with what the fuck I say. You see what

01:02:20.080 I'm saying? Like, dude, that's the reality of standing for things and being who you are

01:02:24.960 and developing a real character, whether, you know, that aligns with everybody else's

01:02:29.300 or not. Accomplishing things. Dude, the best we can do is the best we can fucking do.

01:02:34.940 And the cards are going to fall where they may. But I am a huge believer that if you

01:02:38.260 make more deposits than you do withdrawals, you will be rewarded appropriately for those

01:02:43.140 deposits versus the withdrawals you make from people. People will remember the good

01:02:47.620 things you did. People will remember that, you know, it's worth doing, you know, like, dude,

01:02:52.960 when I get a letter from like, I've been doing this for nearly a decade now. When I get a

01:02:57.140 letter from someone who says, Hey man, I started listening in 2015. Now I have a company that

01:03:01.960 does, you know, seven or eight figures or even nine figures shit like that. Or like, or like

01:03:08.040 people that write me and they say things like, dude, I was going to give up on my entire life,

01:03:12.600 but I, I, I did 75 hard and discovered a bunch of stuff about myself. I didn't know it like

01:03:18.840 whatever the fuck they say. Like, dude, the point is it's worth it because even if it's

01:03:23.600 just one human, even if it's just one life, what if that's the motherfucker that changes

01:03:27.520 everything? What if that one person that's going to be inspired by your success that you

01:03:33.080 take all the heat for that you take all the fucking arrows for? Okay. What if the one person

01:03:38.600 that will be inspired, even if your success is, is moderate, even if it's just being a good

01:03:44.840 person, what if that person goes on to set the example for the rest of humanity on what

01:03:51.500 it's like, like mother Teresa or somebody like, like that, like, dude, that's how I think about

01:03:56.380 stuff. Like that's, that's how I think. And it's, and dude, it drives me crazy. Cause like,

01:04:01.860 I feel a heavy burden for that, but like, dude, how much better would the world be if we all

01:04:06.060 shouldered a little bit of that burden? You know what I'm saying? How much better would the world be

01:04:10.700 if we had a little grace with each other and like say, Hey dude, you know what? I realized,

01:04:14.680 you know, you stumbled there, but we got this, you know what I'm saying? Instead of like trying

01:04:18.980 to pile on everybody when they're down, like, dude, we have an obligation to be a better society

01:04:24.480 and we're, we're, we're not doing it right now. The best that we could be. I've been, it's been

01:04:29.500 this recurrent thought as, as, as we've had this conversation. I want to know what you guys'

01:04:33.360 response is. I feel like the, the overarching thought that I'm thinking is that, and we talked about

01:04:38.680 I coach too, right? Like I tell my guys all the time too, I can't want more than you want for

01:04:43.460 yourself. So how is that? Like, how do you produce, how do you develop that inner, I guess,

01:04:49.840 check of like, you have to want it more than people want it for you. You know? Cause I think

01:04:54.720 that's kind of like, I mean, that's overarching theme is I think there's a, like not a lot,

01:04:58.960 not, not overwhelming majority of people, but I would say there's a still a decent amount of people

01:05:03.000 that just have not realized like they have to want it more, no matter how much, you know,

01:05:07.280 how many podcasts we put out every single day, you still have to have that inner drive of like,

01:05:10.560 you have to want better. So like, what's your recommendation of that to people?

01:05:14.100 I just say like the messages I try to give these kids, they're not like something I just copy and

01:05:20.120 paste it offline. Like I, I lived through the message. I felt it. So they're going to feel it

01:05:25.840 from my heart. Now it might not connect every day, but one might change their life. And I don't know

01:05:31.440 who that is. Like you were saying, it could be the one kid that changes the whole team. But if he

01:05:36.680 heard it a certain way when he needed it, it's the only reason I do it. Like this whole coaching

01:05:41.140 thing, I also feel an obligation to change these kids minds of all these distractions going on out

01:05:48.740 there that affect everything they're doing. And I just can't stand it because if I was poured into

01:05:55.980 as a teenager, I can't imagine how much better I'd be. Man, I was the starting quarterback in my high

01:06:02.260 school team. You know how many times I thought about other people? Not a lot. Like I was not

01:06:07.960 in that mindset at that point in my life. I fought people, did the wrong things on the weekend. Like

01:06:13.380 I had the backwards mindset because I tried to be a football player off the field. That's why I'm so

01:06:17.840 passionate right now to get through to kids on my team or whoever. It doesn't have to be that way.

01:06:24.040 If you just listen to the answers that we're trying to give you, like Andy puts out stuff every day,

01:06:29.680 he doesn't have to do anything. I saw this warehouse. I see what you're in. You don't got

01:06:35.140 to do anything, but you're here to help people. And I think that's so more important than what you

01:06:41.360 have or anything that else is in your life because you're impacting so many that probably don't say

01:06:47.620 a word. Well, bro, that's why we do this. We say that all the time, but we're a mission-based

01:06:52.400 company. You know, we are mission-based people. We all believe our leadership here. And by the way,

01:06:57.880 thank you for all of that. Uh, that's, that's a tremendous honor to hear from you, except it's

01:07:01.700 a headquarters, not a warehouse in the back. Look, dude, uh, you know, when we, when we think

01:07:10.100 about how the world really works and you think about entrepreneurship and business, you know,

01:07:15.440 I think people, a lot of people have the wrong idea about success. You know, they, they believe

01:07:19.860 that the way to win is to like somehow get one over on the customer. When in reality, whatever it is

01:07:25.660 you do serves a need of that customer and whatever that need is, solving that problem should be the

01:07:31.120 mission of whatever it is that you do. And so many people look at like the success, you know,

01:07:36.360 this is what I think is a lot, a lot of problem with, uh, Instagram culture, right? They look at

01:07:41.240 the car and bro, I love cars. I got all the shit. Okay. So like, I'm not, I'm not, not knocking it,

01:07:46.940 bro. It's cool. But what I'm saying is, is that, you know, you guys look at these things,

01:07:51.920 like the cars, the house, money, all these things. And you set out on a journey to, to get these

01:07:58.400 things. And that journey always ends up being impossible. Like you can't win that way. The

01:08:05.520 way to win in real world is to solve problems. And so whatever it is your company does or whatever

01:08:12.800 it is your company, uh, is supposed to do or whatever it is you think needs to be solved,

01:08:18.060 which is actually the best thing that you could try to solve because whatever problems you see

01:08:22.620 and you passionately believe need to have a solution. Those are the ones that you're going

01:08:26.540 to have the most interest in solving, which is going to make for a better product, which is your

01:08:30.880 solution, which is how you get paid. But like, guys, if you, if you, this is why we always say,

01:08:36.540 like, you have to care because you have to care about what it means to the customer and you have to

01:08:42.140 care to what it means to their life to solve this problem. And if you focus on solving that problem,

01:08:48.760 dude, all the success in the world will come to you. It really will because people just have the

01:08:53.860 wrong idea of how it actually works. And so if you really think about it like that, we've moved from

01:08:59.280 a society where, you know, making money, um, was somehow like a bad thing to where if you're actually

01:09:08.840 successful in today's age with the amount of word of mouth that can travel about your brand,

01:09:13.060 I think that says something about how well you solve the problem, which is how you're supposed

01:09:18.020 to win anyway. So like, it really does kind of equate guys to like do the right thing and you'll

01:09:23.980 have success in that thing. And it's just so hard to get people to, to understand that if you apply

01:09:31.000 that, that line of thinking to athletics or to strength or to your relationship or to pursuing

01:09:38.200 excellence in your own life in any way, I'm not just talking about money, but if you apply that

01:09:43.620 line of thinking of pouring yourself into, uh, the actual solution, dude, you got it figured out.

01:09:50.940 Yeah. I say this. I tell the guys you're studying wrong. You're studying the wrong things. You study

01:09:56.360 Andy for seller. You see success. You better start studying his failures. Yeah. You better start

01:10:02.180 studying the mountain. Yeah. Yeah. And you better start studying the, like Peyton Manning. We met him

01:10:08.000 yesterday. He spoke to our team. He comes in, he says, look, I'm a hall of fame quarterback. My first

01:10:13.900 year I led the league and I still hold the record for the most interceptions in the NFL as a rookie.

01:10:18.360 Yeah. And he was hilarious about it, but God, that's so true. It's unbelievable. The fact that

01:10:25.320 people just negate that they, I'll tell you what they study their timelines, people doing well,

01:10:30.720 people doing well, people, so it's all they have in their head. And they think that it's just going

01:10:34.860 to happen for them. Like we talked about earlier. It's not, you got to start studying what they had

01:10:39.680 to go through. You want my, you want what I have, want what I went through. Like that's the truth.

01:10:45.140 Yeah. And I think DJ back to your lesson in the kind of, to both Lou and Andrew's point,

01:10:50.620 you know, something that I, I get that I think gets overlooked far too often is, you know,

01:10:57.400 success. The, the simple plan that Andrew just laid out about being successful. I mean, it's,

01:11:01.540 it's actually extremely easy. Like it's literally that simple. And I think that's where people get

01:11:05.800 lost. Where it gets hard is the consistency of doing it over a very, very long period of time.

01:11:10.340 You know, you have to fall in love with the process, not just the end result. And I think

01:11:13.680 that piece as a young person, because you don't get it instantly because we live in such a society

01:11:18.880 of instant gratification. Like they want the win now. Well, dude. And I think that lends

01:11:22.360 that lends itself to the, to, to the problem. Right. Of course. Like we're studying, people are

01:11:28.020 studying the wrong examples of what they believe success to be. You know, success is not 22 years old

01:11:36.240 with a fucking Lambo on the Instagram. That's not success, bro. Check in with that dude when he's

01:11:41.920 42, see where he's at. Okay. We have to start like verifying, uh, like where it's like you said

01:11:50.300 earlier, consider the source. Well, like I, like I see, dude, I hear this all the time. This is one

01:11:57.200 thing I hear all the time. And I answered this on my Instagram story yesterday. You know, I had a 21 year

01:12:03.020 old, uh, uh, kid right in, uh, you know, I feel like everyone else is winning at a young age and

01:12:11.000 I don't really even know what I want to do. And I gotta, you know, I, I want to do this, but I'm not

01:12:14.980 sure. And I could tell from reading, like he mentioned, like, he's like, you're young and you're

01:12:20.960 so successful. I'm like, bro, I am literally twice your age. I have been doing what I do for two years

01:12:30.200 longer than you have been alive on this planet. So like what's expected now is like these, a lot

01:12:38.520 of these kids feel like because they didn't make it at 22 or 23, they didn't make it like, bro,

01:12:45.720 those guys that you think made it, they haven't made it, bro. You go ahead. Well, no, I was just,

01:12:51.320 I mean, it's my Monday morning meeting. I know you guys weren't there, which is kind of odd. It's,

01:12:54.020 it's, you know, you have to look at like, you know, if you want to live, you want to have your

01:12:58.440 dream life. And you can, in this building, you can do that, but you got to give me 18 years.

01:13:03.620 You know what I mean? You got to give me 18 years, kind of like cold trickle and days of thunder my

01:13:06.800 way. And if you do it and you consistently show up every single day, I promise you in 18 years,

01:13:11.640 the human, the character of human that's on the other side of that is not only are you going to

01:13:15.900 be proud of yourself, you're gonna be living the life you want. You're going to be around people you

01:13:18.520 want. You're going to be doing a living a fucking real life that you dreamed of, but you got to give me

01:13:23.920 time. And you got to let that cake bake, man. Andy, I heard you say it the other day, the free

01:13:28.260 work you do. And when I think about the free internships I did in college, I was playing D3

01:13:35.180 football in college. I went home for the summer. So my first, my junior year in college, I went home

01:13:41.520 and I did a division one internship at University of South Florida. Blown away by how cool it was,

01:13:47.660 you know, in awe. Worked for free, actually worked out with the 9am group and then coached the next three

01:13:52.520 because I was still going back to play. That summer changed my complete mindset and it gave

01:13:57.660 me so much drive in my heart to make it in this field because I knew I could do it. And the next

01:14:03.060 summer, still had my senior year to play, moved to Virginia. I go home to Tampa, but I moved to

01:14:07.440 Virginia and worked for free all summer. Guess what I got paid in though? Not money. I got paid in

01:14:14.300 mentorship. I got paid in accountability. I got paid in this is how it should be. I got paid in

01:14:20.900 leadership. I got paid in a belief system of core values, man. I was given more than I ever could

01:14:26.860 have asked for in money because it set my whole career up in the right stuff poured into me. And

01:14:32.420 I, and I think those mentors every day and, and you see Andy and you see people at the top and you see

01:14:39.180 all this stuff, but did you see how hard I worked when no one was paying me when I didn't even have an

01:14:44.940 Instagram when I had all this stuff. That's why you're here, bro. I was 12 years into, I was 12

01:14:51.880 years into the same business before I even started an Instagram account. You know what I'm saying?

01:14:57.080 Like it's the, the false expectation that's being set is very dangerous because it makes people think

01:15:06.220 that they're doing it wrong or they're unqualified. Um, and guys, it just takes time. And, and, and by the way,

01:15:14.760 I'm nowhere near the top. Uh, I got a long way to go, but I'll take, I'll take, uh, the, you know,

01:15:22.720 the time that it takes guys, you know, it's less time than what, like guys I had, like what I had

01:15:27.320 to put in or what's, you know, Sal and I've had to put in and Chris and these guys here, like that

01:15:32.940 you got to remember the first fucking decade, there was no social media. Like you guys have access to

01:15:39.380 tools, you know, you can have access to people who are willing to share their, their struggles and

01:15:44.720 their lessons and their knowledge for, you know, for free or at least very inexpensive. And I tell

01:15:50.380 you what, if you go back and listen to the MFCEO project, uh, and started episode one and go all

01:15:55.380 the way through, you're going to learn enough to get to a point where you can pay for like a more

01:16:00.100 in-depth mentorship program. And those investments, you know, they weren't there, those tools,

01:16:05.440 they weren't there for us. Like I got to read a Tony Robbins book and listen to some CDs,

01:16:09.720 which by the way, I was very thankful for because I wouldn't be here without it. Okay. But at the end

01:16:14.880 of the day, there's so, there's also a problem that it's so much access because there's people that

01:16:20.620 aren't really qualified. Yeah. They're stealing. Yeah. They're fucking stealing. Yeah, bro. You know,

01:16:25.840 they're out there saying, Oh, it's what it takes to be successful. And you don't know.

01:16:28.440 Yeah. It goes back to qualifying the source. You better be careful who you're getting this

01:16:31.340 information from. Like, dude, like what's their address? Go see their place. Yeah. Come on down.

01:16:35.320 Yeah. Like order off their website. To be clear, you have to schedule a time to get a tour here.

01:16:38.620 Yeah. Please do not show up here. I just think it's important, you know, for you guys to recognize

01:16:44.800 that a lot of this stuff that you're being fed is not accurate. Like this thing of like the 25 year

01:16:50.420 old boss millionaire traveling the world on a yacht, like this, this idea, that's a cool aspiration,

01:16:56.480 bro. Like when I was 19, I wanted to be that at 25 too. And at 25, I was broke as fuck. And I kept

01:17:03.820 that dream, dude. I kept the aspirations of a cool life. I just kept working towards it. And

01:17:09.280 eventually all that cool stuff came, but you know, don't quit because it doesn't come in the first

01:17:15.920 year or the first two or the first three, you know, what took me 10 years should take you four

01:17:21.500 years now with the technology that we have. Well, and I think all the things that I'm proud of that

01:17:26.640 I've, the skillsets that I've developed are all through the lonely times. You know what I mean?

01:17:30.980 Those are the things that's actually the advice of it. Like whenever people, they want you to pay

01:17:34.300 them to mentor them and all stuff, like really all they want is they want the secret on how to get

01:17:37.280 through the shit. Honestly, I just can't give that to you. Right. Unfortunately, you have to realize

01:17:41.880 that swimming in open water for, for a triathlon is very fucking difficult and you're going to think

01:17:45.880 like you're going to drown. You know what I mean? Like, so I encourage you to get in the water and go

01:17:48.860 feel that, but that's life in general and that's how it works. But I, I, I thought this through

01:17:54.360 after Monday's meeting, I wanted to get to this point, you know, 18 years. Okay. Uh, 18 years,

01:17:58.360 you give me 18 years and I, and I, cause I'm going through this like self reflection dad

01:18:02.920 thing right now. Cause you always kind of like the winning thing. Like you always think maybe

01:18:06.580 I'm not doing good enough, but I, you know, like I just, every day I go home, I think I

01:18:09.660 could have done more here. Every day I leave my kids, I should have done more for my kids.

01:18:12.600 Right. So I'm constantly in that, in that struggle. But the thing being is what I realized is your

01:18:17.860 kids, you know, in terms of success for Instagram era, they don't care how many cars you have.

01:18:23.760 They don't care what car you drive. They actually don't care how much money you have. They don't

01:18:27.160 give a fuck that you're cool. They actually care that you're there. They care. It's time. It goes

01:18:31.060 back to time. They care that you're present. They care that you invest in them. They care that you'll

01:18:34.840 put catch with them. They care that you'll kick with them, lay on the couch with them. They that's,

01:18:38.420 they care about the time. And when it comes like the older I get more, I realize how valuable time

01:18:42.740 is like times the times the secret. And I think as a young person, you have to look at it and say,

01:18:47.220 okay, well, I got a time. Time is my game because the time that you invest in the relationships,

01:18:51.220 the time you invest in yourself, the time you invest out on the field playing,

01:18:54.440 that's what matters. And I think, you know, for me, um, stop worrying about the end result.

01:19:01.460 Start worrying about focusing on what details matter today and winning today and falling in

01:19:05.680 love with that process. And if you want to be a great dad, it has nothing to do with

01:19:09.120 driving a Ferrari. You know what I'm saying? No, it has to do with making sure that, Hey,

01:19:14.240 he wants to go out and sit, play catch today. Cool. Let's go. And guess what? When he gets hit in the

01:19:17.740 face with a ball, you know what I mean? You got to say, bro, listen, you got to put the glove there.

01:19:21.400 Right, right, right. But in order to get hit, hit in the face with the ball, guess what you got to

01:19:24.440 be doing? You got to be in the game. You got to be playing fucking catch. That's it. Yeah, dude.

01:19:29.180 You know, I, you know, the other thing too, that you're saying, Sal, that makes me really

01:19:35.360 like appreciate all the, you know, I'm so thankful that, that like, like the shit I'm the most thankful

01:19:43.080 for are some of the hardest fucking times I've had to go through. Like, you know, you and I,

01:19:48.360 like we've, we've dealt with, you know, hard situations. Right. But if you look back at like

01:19:53.180 those hard situations, those were where we made the biggest fucking improvement in pivots, best

01:19:58.660 pivots. Yeah. And if you, if you can understand that, that, you know, you're going to wake up the

01:20:06.020 next day and go to, go to war and like improve to be better that like, as long as you're willing

01:20:11.860 to get up and move, you're going to get there. Like explain. I want you to really think about

01:20:17.580 this. Like fucking think about this. You guys listening. I want you guys in the room, like

01:20:22.840 really like, tell me this. If you break your day down into what you consider a win of a day

01:20:32.260 and you win Monday and then you win Tuesday again. Okay. So you've only won the 24 hours in front of

01:20:40.100 you, which means you've accomplished certain critical tasks. All right. You win Monday,

01:20:46.740 you win Tuesday, you win Wednesday, you lose Thursday, you win Friday, you win Saturday,

01:20:52.020 you lose Sunday. And let's say you take that pattern over the course of the next 20 years

01:21:00.680 and you've won that much more than you've lost. Explain to me how the fuck you can lose a life.

01:21:10.740 Someone tell me if you win more days than you lose, your life is going to look like a win.

01:21:16.840 It is that simple. And so all you really have to worry about is the 24 hours in front of your face.

01:21:24.020 So break that down. This is what the power list that I talk about all the time that I give away

01:21:29.060 for free. It's free. Okay. Go back to episode 16. Listen to it. It is a foolproof system. If you

01:21:37.860 follow it the way it's intended, I'm telling you right now, because dude, it's the only way I can

01:21:44.840 figure out that you're guaranteed to win at life. Because if you can literally make a game and you

01:21:49.980 can win six out of seven days or five out of seven days, how can you lose? Like how, how can you not

01:21:57.820 get where you want to go? I don't under it. Am I missing something here? And once you figure out

01:22:02.480 that he's correct, you can go to Andy for solid.com and pick up the MF CEO project or the, uh, the

01:22:06.440 powerless book. Yeah. But that's not a pitch dude. No, that's not a pitch. It's very nice. You can buy

01:22:11.400 it. But he's got a great brother who built it for him. You know what I mean? That's true. Comes a nice

01:22:15.160 package. No, but the truth of the matter is, is it, I know if it were up to me, it'd still be just a

01:22:19.180 notebook, but it's, but, but the, but go back to it. It's simple. It's simple. But if you give it

01:22:24.240 time, you'd let it play out over here and fucking, you know, over your life saying, and that's the

01:22:28.280 thing about, you know, making sure that you, it's not about being perfect. It's about making progress.

01:22:32.440 Dude. And the other thing is, is that it's, it's about your own self. It's what you can

01:22:41.080 control. Okay. You can still win your day and have a terrible day. Like that's what people don't

01:22:48.580 understand. Like you can get your fucking balls smashed in by the world. But if you systemize

01:22:55.580 your success, like I'm talking about, and you accomplish those, those five critical tasks

01:23:01.460 on that day, you still fucking won. Even though the world came crashing down on you, bro. If you can

01:23:08.140 win, when the world's coming at you, if you can win, when the conditions fucking suck,

01:23:15.840 how good can you be when they're good? I always say to like, just to add to your point,

01:23:21.840 I told the team this probably my second day there. Failure to me is the most positive word

01:23:27.680 in the dictionary, because if I never failed, if I never had these hard times, if I never had

01:23:34.100 all these doubt issues creep in, or is it me or all this stuff had to get through. If I never had

01:23:40.300 that, if I never lived through it, I would not be a valuable person for these players. Like that's how

01:23:45.580 I look at it. If I take all these things that I failed at, or I wasn't given and had to get through

01:23:52.480 it on my own and had to find a way anyways, I would never be able to give so much to these players.

01:23:58.180 If you never had to live, Andy, what you've gone through, Sal, DJ, you would not be able to do

01:24:03.320 this podcast because you wouldn't be able to say anything. Yeah. What are we going to say?

01:24:06.860 You know what I mean? Hey guys, let's win and have a great day. All right.

01:24:11.780 Good game guys. Dude. And what's cool. You know, the thing that's weird about that dude is like

01:24:16.940 people fucking overvalue the, the, the really good times and totally like shit on the, on the bad

01:24:23.220 times. Like bro, you know, the bad times are no fun for everybody. Everybody gets that racy

01:24:28.420 feeling in their heart. Like everybody gets those hands, those shaky hands. Everybody feels a little

01:24:33.140 sick. We all know what that feels like. It's fucking terrible, but separate from that feeling

01:24:38.560 for a second and say, what'd you learn? What am I going to gain out of this? That's what will pull

01:24:43.200 you through, dude. That's what will pull you through. All you have to do is not fucking quick

01:24:49.000 and wake up the next day with that lesson in your pocket and keep moving. And it might be another

01:24:54.160 three months. It might be another six months before you're, you know, feeling better for what,

01:25:00.360 cause there could be some pretty fucked up things that happen to us. But dude, as long as you don't

01:25:05.480 quit and you get up and you execute and you do what we're talking about, you win more days and you

01:25:09.220 fucking lose your life is going to look like a winning life. It just is. And that skillset too,

01:25:15.200 like when you, when, when you look at somebody else, okay, let's say you identify somebody you

01:25:19.440 find a value and they're out in front of you five years, 10 years, two years, maybe they're even

01:25:23.380 behind you, you know, 36, you look at them and you think, well, it's, here's what the self

01:25:27.980 justification in your head. Well, it's easy for them. Well, they, they got a different little set

01:25:31.900 of cards. So they got, listen, I'm telling you from, it is fucking hard. There ain't nothing easy

01:25:37.680 about living at the best set of cards. You get the fucking best set. And it's still hard.

01:25:42.420 It's still fucking hard. And, and dude, if you got the worst set, that sucks. It's going

01:25:47.520 to be a little harder for you. Better bluff. Yeah. No, hold on. It might be a little harder

01:25:53.480 from you, but are you going to fucking quit? Like, bro, no, that is not what the fuck we

01:25:59.460 do here. You know what I'm saying? Like, we don't look at the fucking shit and say, man,

01:26:03.600 I got it fucking worse than that guy. So I'm just going to fucking fold it in.

01:26:07.240 Listen, you play Texas hold them and guys got Kings got two, three. You don't, you don't

01:26:10.560 just quit. You know what I'm saying? Throw a little fucking, all right, I'm going to

01:26:13.920 see if I get the straight, you know, but that, but that's the, that's the key. That's the

01:26:17.640 key to life. A lot of people are there. Maybe not the key. It's a key. They're so afraid

01:26:22.320 of failing of fear. And then they judge them or they, they, they self-justify themselves

01:26:27.380 out of the game by saying, well, it's different for them. I can't do it. This is why I can't

01:26:30.000 know. No, no, no, no, no. Anybody who's done something great in their life has come from

01:26:34.940 a place of fucking pain. It's come from a place of uncomfortableness. You fucking think I like

01:26:39.640 it when the whole internet comes on my fucking head for saying something, bro, every time

01:26:44.860 that kind of shit happens where you go through a hardship or you go through a difficult time

01:26:49.960 or you go through a time where, you know, you feel like nobody's around or nobody, bro,

01:26:56.040 those are opportunities to fucking get better. So we have to stop valuing the, we have to stop

01:27:03.500 valuing the, you know, the great times because dude, the great times are only a small part of

01:27:09.500 our entire life. High school Letterman. No, I'm just saying like, dude, the, the, the moment

01:27:14.220 of glory that the beer on the beach, the fucking, those are moments. That's not your life. Yes.

01:27:22.100 And you shouldn't live your whole life and appreciate your, your whole life. If you think

01:27:27.260 that your whole life is going to be these moments, you're going to be disappointed forever.

01:27:31.360 You're going to feel like you fucking lost bro. Everybody has hard times. Everybody has times

01:27:37.960 that are okay. And everybody has great times. The goal is to fucking navigate each scenario

01:27:45.400 and produce as many great times as you can and get ready to try to get rid of this. Maybe even

01:27:50.500 learn to appreciate the, not the, the, the peaceful times, so to speak, and the bad weather,

01:27:57.360 because the bad weather makes you a more skilled sailor. All right. Like, dude, if we all start

01:28:02.880 appreciating these times for what they are, we'd be a lot less angry. We'd be a lot more fulfilled

01:28:07.400 and we'd be a lot more wise and be able to share with people because dude, right now, what I see in

01:28:12.620 society is a whole lot of people trying to replicate, um, you know, the beer, the Corona commercial

01:28:20.140 and, and, and then everything else is shit. So their whole life fucking sucks. And bro, that's

01:28:25.760 not, I can't tell you the last time I was on a beach with the fucking Corona bro. And it looks

01:28:30.660 pretty good. You know what I'm saying? Like maybe I should make time to do that, but I'm just saying

01:28:35.500 it's, that's not your life, man. Your life is like, you know, the things you do on a micro level

01:28:43.520 every single day, like the habits you build, the skills you build, the people you're around,

01:28:47.940 the mission you're working to solve process. Yeah. I think the biggest thing with that,

01:28:53.740 if I mean, look, all these kids growing up right now that all they got to do at, at getting better

01:28:59.420 at is being a private success. You know, the, everyone's a public success. Everyone's got it

01:29:05.780 online. Look at me. I'm got, got this. If you continue to work on being a private success in the

01:29:12.580 dark, you're going to have fun in public. Yeah. Well, listen, bro, we're running an hour and a

01:29:20.660 half here. It's about double what we were going to do. I really, really, really appreciate not only

01:29:28.380 you coming and making the trip, you know, Lou flew up here. He's flying right back. He's got a work to

01:29:33.200 do, but dude, what you're doing is important. And, um, you know, you guys listening, I hope you

01:29:41.860 follow Lou. How can they follow you? Um, at Luke Carell on Instagram or at Lewis Carell on Twitter,

01:29:47.440 follow this man, you know, support this man, encourage those boys that he's working with,

01:29:53.100 because dude, these, these are the things that matter right now. You know, when I talk about a

01:29:57.640 cultural revolution, it's not going to be the 42 year old men. It's going to be what we pour into

01:30:04.980 these 20 year old men and these 20 year old women. And so, bro, I just really appreciate all the work

01:30:11.120 you're doing. I mean that from my heart. I appreciate who you are and all the support that you've shown us.

01:30:15.820 Um, and I'm really looking forward to seeing what you do from here on out, brother.

01:30:21.540 I appreciate you. Can't thank you enough guys. All of you, um, being here gives me chills watching you

01:30:27.340 in your seat right now, knowing that I drive to work every day, listening to you. It's just,

01:30:32.340 honestly, it's, it's a dream. It's, uh, what you're doing here. I'll say it again. People need it.

01:30:40.240 And I know sometimes it gets frustrating and I know there's a lot of hate that comes with it, but

01:30:43.980 you help people, you guys make a difference and they might not all come ringing at your doorbell

01:30:51.700 saying, Hey, thank you. But I'm telling you, they hear you. And that's the only thing you could

01:30:56.160 control right now. The greatest impact that you guys will ever have is the impact you'll never

01:31:00.580 see. So I mean, I think we're all on the same mission. Thank you so much. Thank you. I appreciate

01:31:06.100 that guys. That's the show. You enjoyed the show. Please share the show.

01:31:10.700 We'll see you next time.

01:31:20.640 Bank road. Can't fold. Doesn't know. Headshot. Case closed.

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - August 10, 2022

356. Opportunity Through Struggle Ft. Lewis Caralla

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