REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 476. Q&AF： Getting Comfortable With Conflict, Pushing Through Discouragement & Lessons In Giving

00:00:00.000 What is up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realists say goodbye to

00:00:20.620 the lies, the thickness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality

00:00:24.740 guys. Today we have Q and AF. This is where you get to submit the questions and we will give you the

00:00:30.540 answers. You could submit your questions one of two ways. The first way is guys, as always email

00:00:37.680 those questions into ask Andy at andy for seller.com. The second way is, is if you didn't

00:00:43.660 know, cause a lot of you guys are behind in episodes like months and even years behind.

00:00:48.900 We are on YouTube now. So we have full length episodes on YouTube. Most of our

00:00:54.740 audience is still audio heavy. So we're building that up over there, but it's pretty cool. I think

00:00:59.080 people are liking it in some good comments. I think it's, uh, it's fun. It's, it's, I don't know,

00:01:05.200 see how it goes. But anyway, if you drop your comments, uh, underneath the episode, the Q and

00:01:10.180 AF episodes, we will pull some from there as well. The questions is what I meant. Uh, other times you

00:01:15.840 tune in on the show. If this is your first time listening, we have multiple formats of the show.

00:01:19.740 Uh, today you get Q and AF, like I just said, uh, other times you're going to get CTI. That stands

00:01:24.780 for cruise the internet. That's our social, uh, news slash comedy slash, uh, talk about the crazy

00:01:31.460 shit that's going on in the world format of the show. And that's actually my favorite show to do.

00:01:36.500 Um, it's not your favorite to listen to though. Apparently a lot of you guys like the Q and AFs.

00:01:40.940 So you're gonna have to deal with my opinions as well. Fuckers. Uh, sometimes you tune in and get real

00:01:46.560 talk. Real talk is five to 20 minutes of just some real talk. I think that needs to be shared.

00:01:50.540 And then other times you're gonna get full length. Full length is like we add on our last episode.

00:01:54.740 We have a buddy of mine come in. Uh, they're usually interesting, successful, have a unique

00:01:59.960 worldview, a story to tell. We have a conversation just like you see on most of the other podcasts.

00:02:05.160 Um, one thing you'll notice that we do differently is that we don't run ads on the show. Okay. I don't

00:02:11.340 take money from advertisers that want to pay me to take their shit because I don't do that. I

00:02:18.820 represent and talk about the things that I think I like. And, uh, I don't want to flood your

00:02:24.040 podcast with 40 minutes of fucking bullshit ads, uh, for some money. I already do pretty well.

00:02:29.780 You guys do a great job of supporting us and I appreciate that. So in that trade, all I ask is

00:02:35.420 that if we do a good job, if we put out some good info, if it makes you laugh and makes you think,

00:02:39.540 uh, if it answers your questions, you know, the Q and AF shows like today, they have an extreme

00:02:43.820 amount of value in them. If we help you get better, please share the show. That's how we work. So when

00:02:47.960 we say pay the fee, that's what we mean. Just share the show. With that being said, uh, it's been a

00:02:53.700 minute. Yeah. Yeah. Has been a minute. See people, we, we pre-recorded all last week's shows. And then

00:02:59.600 yesterday we had our full length with Jason. Um, but we haven't done any Q and AF in a while or CTI. I'm

00:03:06.080 looking forward to getting back on CTI, dude. Yeah, me too. That's my favorite

00:03:09.420 show to do. Really? Yeah. It's my favorite show to do because it's like, it's almost like therapy,

00:03:14.620 you know, in front of the whole fucking world. We're going to talk about this crazy shit, but,

00:03:19.000 uh, you know, Q and AF is good too. Yeah. I mean, they go, they, they, there's a symbiotic

00:03:24.700 relationship between the two episodes. Absolutely. People have a hard time connecting. Yeah. Yeah.

00:03:29.340 Like some people, I think most people, you know, people are getting it now, but they're not

00:03:33.480 understanding, you know, like guys, the reason that we must talk about what's going on in the world

00:03:37.420 is because that affects the business environment. This is an entrepreneurship, personal development

00:03:41.740 business show. It always has been since the MFCEO project back in 2015. And for those of you guys

00:03:47.480 that don't know, we are relaunching that podcast very soon, um, as it's unique standalone podcast.

00:03:52.460 So I'll have more news on that soon, but it's always been personal development. It's always been

00:03:56.540 how to win, how to get better. But guys that, you know, the, the thing with CTI is if we don't know

00:04:00.500 what the fuck is going on in the world and we don't take action to protect our freedoms, you know,

00:04:04.760 the, our ability to make money and have success and build things in real life is affected. So

00:04:08.920 they do go together, uh, very, very, uh, synergistically. It's just, you know, sometimes

00:04:14.520 you have to explain it to people. Yeah, for sure, man. Yeah. But no, I mean, I don't feel like we

00:04:18.460 really missed a beat last week, but, uh, there was, there was definitely, you guys didn't miss me.

00:04:24.180 No, I'm saying like the content was pumping out. Oh yeah. Yeah. You know, we made it look pretty

00:04:28.120 good, but you were, you were, uh, hiatus. Yeah, man. I was down in Mexico. I went to, uh,

00:04:34.520 I went to Cabo, uh, stayed at the Pedregal resort, which was amazing. I have nothing but amazing

00:04:40.580 things to say about that. You definitely, you know, shouldn't go there because I don't want

00:04:44.240 to be crowded next time I go. Right. Um, but it was awesome. The people were awesome. Uh,

00:04:49.940 the weather was great. It was about 70 degrees every day, but good sun. Uh, so much sun that I'm

00:04:55.320 like shedding a whole entire skin. Um, because I got burned so bad the first day deceptive. It

00:05:01.380 was like nice and cool, but the sun was like powerful. Yeah. That Mexican. Yeah. It was

00:05:07.240 impressive. Yeah. It was, uh, I understand. Had a lot of girth. I get it. It was girthy. It was a

00:05:12.400 girthy sun. Girthy sun. Yep. One thing, one thing that was interesting out of me too, bro.

00:05:18.600 You said what? No, one thing I thought that was cool though. Cause I mean, we talked quite

00:05:25.280 a bit during the trip and it was like, you know, one of the things that I thought was

00:05:29.080 cool was you mentioned how it didn't matter where you went on the resort, but it was like

00:05:34.380 every member of the staff. Bro was amazing. Knew your name. Yeah. It was amazing. It was

00:05:39.120 so, you know, I take a lot of pride in how we do business. You know what I'm saying? Like

00:05:44.980 we're not, we're not, nobody's perfect. Nobody can run a perfect company, but here in my, you

00:05:50.820 know, first form S2, uh, the other companies, everything that we got going on here, we try

00:05:55.280 really fucking hard. Right. And we try to do a very good job for our customers. We try

00:05:59.540 to go over the top. We're very, very much focused on that experience aspect of, of brand building

00:06:05.400 because the truth of it is, is like, I'm not that skilled. So I know that if we make a,

00:06:12.800 if we do good by the customer and we create amazing experiences, you know, people will, will,

00:06:16.740 will help us and they'll shop with us and support us. And, uh, so I'm very detail oriented. You

00:06:21.860 know, when I go around, I go to a restaurant or I go to, uh, you know, anything, any place of

00:06:27.720 business, wherever, I'm always an observer. I'm like paying attention to how they're doing things.

00:06:32.460 And, you know, this resort, uh, the Pedregal is, is by all means a very, very, very nice resort,

00:06:39.120 top notch. Um, and I've been to other top notch resorts. Like I've, you know, I've been doing this

00:06:45.440 for a minute, you know? And, uh, I was just the amount, the level of service that that place had

00:06:53.200 and the level of attention to detail was something that even somebody who's very, very, very used to

00:07:01.940 paying attention to those things was impressed by. I was, it was very impressive. That's what,

00:07:05.880 that's what got me. Yeah. It was very impressive. Yeah. Yeah. When you brought that up, I knew it

00:07:09.680 had to be something fucking pretty special. Yeah. It was, um, it was, uh,

00:07:15.440 like anywhere you went on the resort, they knew your name and it didn't matter who it was. It

00:07:20.860 didn't matter if it was the guy sweeping up the sidewalks and it was your waiter, if it was the,

00:07:25.140 if it was the, you know, the busser or any of the other jobs on this resort, it didn't matter.

00:07:29.160 They knew who the fuck you were. And it wasn't just cause it was me because like, it wasn't just

00:07:34.080 for me. Like it was for every single guest on the resort. And it was, it was, uh, whoever's running

00:07:40.660 that, like, however they do it, it, they're doing a good job. Yeah. Let me ask you this. Do you find

00:07:44.880 yourself now, like at 24 years in, do you find yourself constantly like looking at these other

00:07:50.580 industries, restaurants, wherever you go and like finding these comparisons, like of what we could

00:07:56.180 be doing better? Like how often do you, I guess, reflect on that? Well, cause I haven't, like, I mean,

00:08:00.580 like all the time and it's cool because what you asked, um, I actually do look at the restaurant

00:08:07.020 industry for a lot, the hospitality industry, right? Hotels, restaurants, people. Yeah. Because

00:08:13.240 like, dude, that's where you're going to see, uh, very strong examples of going above and beyond for

00:08:19.540 people. And that's something that, uh, you know, I always try to pay special attention when I do,

00:08:24.520 cause I don't travel a lot. I like to do my own thing, man. I like to go to my house. I like to come

00:08:29.440 here. I really don't fuck around with anybody. I kind of do my own thing. And it's not, you know,

00:08:34.060 because I don't enjoy being around people. It's just, that's how I, that's my natural way of

00:08:39.660 enjoying life is just, I like to be left the fuck alone. And, um, I like to be around people too,

00:08:47.040 but they gotta be the right kind of, right? Like I'm not one for bullshit conversation. I'm not one

00:08:53.460 for small talk. I want to talk about real shit. I want to talk about shit that matters. And if I'm

00:08:58.200 around those kinds of people, bro, it's fucking amazing. Um, but unfortunately, you know,

00:09:02.100 half the people out there aren't that way. And so, you know, I'm not saying I'm a hermit,

00:09:07.080 but I don't travel that much, but when I do travel, um, I pay real close attention. And when

00:09:12.980 I go to a restaurant, I pay real close attention. And it's not because I'm trying to critique them.

00:09:16.820 I'm actually viewing it from a perspective of what can I learn? What can I do to get better?

00:09:22.440 And, you know, I think a lot of people, they go to these places and they look for holes

00:09:25.760 gotcha. Yeah. Right. Right there. And like, dude, look, man, you know, when you run a high level,

00:09:31.200 high attention, detail operation, whether it be a company or, uh, you know, like our companies or

00:09:37.560 resorts or restaurants or whatever category, when you, when you take pride and people know that you

00:09:43.120 take pride and you're expected to hold a very high standard, there's going to be people that want to

00:09:49.560 fucking poke and look for the negative. Right. And I think, you know, that's okay because I think it

00:09:55.540 helps you get better. Right. Like when I'm actually very grateful when people point a problem out to me

00:10:00.760 so that I can correct that problem. Um, but I think we as consumers, as entrepreneurs,

00:10:07.640 we're do ourselves a much better service by actually going to these places instead of like

00:10:14.480 looking for the things wrong, looking for the things they're doing right. And understanding

00:10:18.480 like, dude, okay. Like there's going to be little things and you can learn from the things they do

00:10:22.280 wrong too. But like, because we're, we live in this society that is so focused on where people

00:10:28.580 fuck up and, and like, I gotcha. Right. Like everybody wants to get like, motherfucker, like

00:10:32.960 cool. Like if you're a true, if you're a true operator, you're going to look at those situations

00:10:39.340 as an opportunity to get better. That won't affect real operators. Yeah. No. Yeah. Like you're like,

00:10:43.900 okay, fuck, you got me. Like, let me fucking fix that over here real quick. You know? And that's

00:10:47.820 how you should be addressing it. You know? But I think because we live in this society that's like

00:10:52.200 that. And you know, I, while I do think cancel culture is dying out, I don't think people

00:10:57.380 are thinking it's very cool. I think people are realizing that it's not something to be a part of

00:11:00.980 or contribute to no matter what side you're on. Um, I think we have a propensity to look at the bad

00:11:10.400 things when we go to places and that keeps us from learning from where we can get better. So what I

00:11:15.160 try to do, like the whole time I was down there, dude, I was watching these guys trying to figure

00:11:19.280 out, okay, like, well, how could we translate this to our business where we could create a better

00:11:23.140 experience for our people? Yeah. You know? And, and, um, you know, I got some, I got a bunch of

00:11:28.440 notes. I got like a whole, whole bunch of notes. Uh, but like, it's very rare. And I don't mean,

00:11:33.020 I mean, as a matter of fact, I'm not saying this to brag or anything, but I have very particular high

00:11:38.980 standards. And I think my company speak for themselves. Do we have hiccups sometimes? Sure.

00:11:45.220 Do we have problems sometimes? Sure. But generally we're doing things at a very high level.

00:11:49.920 And when I can go to a place and be super fucking impressed, that gets me excited because I'm like,

00:11:58.760 okay, there's another level to get to here. And, uh, that doesn't happen. The more detail

00:12:03.740 oriented that you become, the more, the more seasoned you become and the more you operate that

00:12:09.760 way, the more rare those experiences are. Like, it's very difficult to wow me. It's very difficult

00:12:16.300 to blow me away. Right. Like, cause that's what I'm always trying to figure out how to do better.

00:12:22.180 But these guys did it, man. And it was, it was cool. Yeah. And, uh, it was the P every,

00:12:26.580 from every single person, dude, there was not like, there was not a single person that wasn't

00:12:31.760 on point. It was impressive. Yeah. How many, how many, like quickly, how many staff, how many people

00:12:37.500 do you think would you say was employed there? Like we talked a ton, like a thousand, maybe?

00:12:41.540 No, not that many. It's only a hundred room resort. Oh, a small, okay. Yeah. It's a little

00:12:46.820 place. Yeah. Um, but I mean, fuck, it seemed like there was at least three people for every

00:12:53.320 gas, like running the play. Yeah. You know what I mean? It was cool, dude. And like, you

00:12:58.580 know, people are like, Oh, I hope you got the detect. Like I got the, all these DMS, like,

00:13:02.120 Hey motherfuckers, I can't detach when you DM me the whole fucking vacation. You know what I'm

00:13:07.720 saying? Oh, I hope you got to detach while I'm typing. I stopped posting halfway through the

00:13:13.500 trip because like, like that's all it was. Oh, I hope you got some R and I. How about just like

00:13:19.800 the motherfucking picture, bro. And let me have a minute. Cause like, I try to be responsive and

00:13:23.560 respectful to people, but like, I'm just being real. Like, like people aren't aware. Like if I

00:13:29.460 post a picture, like, like it doesn't mean I'm going through some sort of fucking life crisis,

00:13:34.440 bro. I actually just like photography and I used to be pretty good at it back in the

00:13:38.320 day. You know what I'm saying? Like, Oh, you're posting these beautiful pictures. It seems

00:13:42.540 like something deep's go. Motherfucker. I'm taking pictures. You know, your journey.

00:13:47.320 Yeah. Like, dude, what, like, what the fuck? Like, why has everything got to mean something

00:13:52.380 like everybody's got to attach this meaning to some shit? Like, is it surprise you that I'm,

00:13:57.860 that I have an artistic eye, right? Like, have you paid attention to the content that my

00:14:01.720 companies have put out for the last fucking two decades? Like we do things pretty decent.

00:14:07.920 Yeah. I have to, I, you know, I don't know what to tell you, man. Like I'm multidimensional.

00:14:12.400 I can take some pictures. I can appreciate art. Yeah. You know, I even speak a little bit

00:14:16.700 of a different languages sometimes. Like I'm, you know, I'm not this fucking redneck from

00:14:20.900 Missouri that y'all motherfuckers think I am. Like I actually got a little bit of culture.

00:14:24.340 That's really what it is. I know it is. It's racism. Yeah. They got, yeah. It's racism.

00:14:28.020 That's what it is. Against Missouri. Yeah. And all of our cousins. Yeah. Fuck dude. Like,

00:14:34.820 I, you know, it's just, dude, it's just weird. Yeah. Like motherfucker. I'm just trying to

00:14:39.440 share some cool pictures with y'all and you got to make it about some life journey. You

00:14:43.680 ask him about ayahuasca. Yeah. Like, I'm just like, I don't know, man. I'm just taking some

00:14:47.940 pictures, but it was cool. Like it, you know, it was good time. Uh, I put on fucking eight

00:14:54.060 pounds when I was there. Yeah. But I think that's mainly because I drank, I didn't get

00:14:59.140 like drunk or anything. Like I just drank a few beers every day, but, but my body's so

00:15:02.780 not used to it that I think I was just retaining water. Cause I was down like after one day of

00:15:07.860 75 hard, like four, four of the eight pounds. Yeah. So yeah. I want to say, well, that's

00:15:12.120 the other thing too. So it's day two. Uh, this will probably be day three when you guys are

00:15:16.080 listening, but 75 hard is going good. And, uh, we're right back into it, man. So it feels

00:15:21.700 good. I'm excited about this round of 75 hard because, um, I was, I was really doing

00:15:26.960 well. And the last one, when I got knocked off at day 51, I think it was, I was kicking

00:15:32.820 ass, bro. And it was very, very, very difficult for me to get as sick as I got. And like, you

00:15:40.040 know, I don't think people realize that I was sick for over a month. Like it wasn't like I

00:15:44.300 was sick for a couple of days. I actually had an infection that took an entire month for

00:15:48.580 me to get out of my body. So it was like, it wasn't like a little deal and that fucked

00:15:53.600 me up mentally, dude. I'm just being real. Like it fucking hammered me because like,

00:15:56.700 I finally felt like, all right, I'm going to get past the shoulder injury. I'm going

00:16:00.460 to get back to where I was. I'm going to be better than I was whenever I got hurt and

00:16:04.560 I could like fucking see it. And then that I got hammered with that thing. So like, you

00:16:11.140 know, it was frustrating. So I'm excited to get back to it. Um, I'm going to give it

00:16:15.620 everything I fucking got for the next 75 days and probably do phase one right afterwards.

00:16:20.440 Uh, but I, I really think after this 75 days, as long as I don't get fucking sick or some

00:16:25.880 shit like that again, or something unforeseen happened. I mean, cause like there was nothing

00:16:30.320 I could do, bro. It wasn't like I could like tough that out. I mean, I had fucking my doctors

00:16:35.780 at my house for three fucking days straight. I was sick as fuck. And, um, that's probably

00:16:42.960 why, you know, I probably pushed a little too hard cause I, you know, was so determined

00:16:47.040 on getting through it. But the reality is, is like, I'm going to give it everything I

00:16:50.800 fucking got. If you guys want to join me, you can, uh, check out episode 208 and it'll

00:16:55.680 give you the whole rundown on 75 hard and live hard program and how it works. Um, you know,

00:17:02.460 we're only on day three. So like you should fucking jump in if it's something that you want

00:17:06.180 to make this change. You know, a lot of people have gone, already gone through the cycle

00:17:10.060 of new year's, not really working out for them and then falling off and kind of like

00:17:13.500 they're in that limbo stage. And you know, like guys, you give it 75 days full effort.

00:17:18.300 You're going to look, feel, and be a completely different person by the beginning of fucking

00:17:22.360 may. Right. You know what I'm saying? So I guess what may is coming regardless. Yeah,

00:17:26.580 that's right. So like, dude, I invite you guys to join with me. If you don't want to,

00:17:29.960 that's cool too, but I'm going to be giving it everything I got. So despite all the DMS,

00:17:34.960 like, did you really get a time to decompress and all of that? No, it was cool, bro.

00:17:38.980 Like it was nice to see some new scenery, you know? Um, it was weird. You know, I think

00:17:44.600 it's, you know, there wasn't a lot, it wasn't a long enough time for me to disconnect. I haven't

00:17:49.460 been on a vacation since, uh, uh, Emily and I's honeymoon. So it was a 10 and a half years

00:17:54.320 since the last vacation that I've been on that wasn't for work or speaking or something like

00:17:59.060 that. I traveled, but it's always been for some version of work. Right. Um, but this was the

00:18:04.900 first time I like, wasn't getting paid to go somewhere. Right. And it was cool, dude. Uh,

00:18:10.680 you know, as far as disconnecting, I think I really, I really truly think social media makes

00:18:17.120 it hard to disconnect. I think next time I go on a trip, I don't think I'm going to fucking

00:18:21.100 utilize social at all or post anything during the time. Because like, you know, you do have a lot

00:18:27.220 of friends and your DMS and shit that you talk to regularly. And you know, I found myself a couple

00:18:31.460 of times getting sucked in for a couple hours when I'd really honestly rather not be doing that.

00:18:36.880 Yeah. Um, it's no fault of theirs. It's just the nature of how we do things now. Um, but I got some

00:18:44.020 time to hang out and like relax and, you know, chill. And I think next time it's going to be longer

00:18:48.280 and it's going to be less connection back to reality. Um, and I do feel like, I don't know,

00:18:53.880 I, I feel different now that I'm back. Um, more normal, less anxiety, less, less stress a little

00:19:03.540 bit, not a lot bit, but a little bit. And like, um, like before I left, dude, like I was at a point

00:19:10.040 and you know, this, like I wasn't even driving, like I wasn't doing the things that I enjoy to do.

00:19:13.880 Like, and I don't have that many hobbies, like one of my hobbies, and I'm not saying this to

00:19:17.820 fucking brag, but it's, I like high performance fucking cars and, um, driving is something that

00:19:24.800 I enjoy. It's, it's not something I do for status. Um, and like today I drove one of my cars, which

00:19:32.240 I hadn't driven a car. I haven't driven one of my cars since probably November or December because

00:19:38.880 the weather's been shitty and all that. Among other things. Huh? Yeah. Yeah. I may or may not

00:19:44.080 have a valid driver's license right now, but we're going to get that taken care of.

00:19:48.320 Um, I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't get it renewed in time. So now I actually have to go

00:19:53.900 take the test again. We talked about making that a YouTube video, but I don't know if they'd allow

00:19:57.760 us to do that. I still got time. Yeah. It'd be funny. Hopefully I pass. That's the big question,

00:20:04.020 but yeah. Yeah. But no, it was good, man. It was good. It's, uh, I learned a couple of things,

00:20:09.200 you know, I learned that I have to do a better job of consciously trying to disconnect.

00:20:14.080 Uh, I think my opinion of social media is getting worse and worse and worse, not better.

00:20:18.480 My desire to want to post and interact on social is becoming less and less. Um, but I also think

00:20:24.860 that, I also think that goes along with like, I'm getting to a point in my life where I don't,

00:20:29.840 and this is going to sound weird, but you should all relate to it. Like, I don't feel like I need to

00:20:35.780 sell anybody on my life anymore. Like I feel like my results speak for themselves. I don't have much to

00:20:40.780 prove to anybody else. You guys kind of know what I'm about. You listen to the show, you see the show,

00:20:45.680 we communicate on the show. There's more context on the show. I enjoy doing the show. You guys enjoy

00:20:50.020 viewing it. Um, but the overall drama of social, the amount of time that is like, I mentioned this

00:20:55.440 a couple of weeks ago, it's just something that I'm going to probably participate less in. You know

00:21:01.440 what I mean? Um, there's a whole lot of life out there, bro. And it's real shit. Like it's real,

00:21:07.220 there's like, that was, that was one thing that was, that was evident because I was off social for

00:21:13.900 most of the trip. You really notice how good people are in real life when you disconnect from

00:21:21.800 social, you know, it's easy for us to look at social and be like, fuck, everybody's a piece of

00:21:26.280 shit. Everybody's angry. Yeah. But dude, it's not that way. It's, it's a small minority of people

00:21:31.000 on the far left and the far right arguing. And then there's, you know, the cloud chasers who

00:21:37.020 would look to create drama and controversy so they can get attention because they have nothing else to

00:21:41.100 offer, you know, and shit like that. So you live in this constant environment of like

00:21:46.120 bullshit. And I think it's very clear when you disconnect for even a little bit, even if it's

00:21:51.880 just like a day or two that, and you go out in the real world, you're like, fuck, this is this,

00:21:56.020 this, what we see on these screens represents very little reality to what actually goes on in real

00:22:03.480 life. I would argue none. I mean, very, very little, like, like most of the shit that people

00:22:08.520 argue about on social media, like you can't even find in the real world. You don't see it. You know

00:22:13.700 what I'm saying? People arguing, you don't see them. Yeah. Very rarely see them. Dude. And people

00:22:17.500 don't talk to each other like that in real life. Like you don't like, like the world is much better

00:22:22.220 in reality than it is on social media. And I think people have so many people have been so head

00:22:28.060 down utilizing the benefits of social for business that you get sucked into it and it becomes like

00:22:34.920 your whole life. Like I see this a lot with like some influencers, right? Like influencers want to

00:22:39.460 like get the views so fucking bad. And at first it's because they want to make a living. Right.

00:22:45.100 But then what happens is, is it like sucks them in to where like, this is their whole entire world,

00:22:50.020 bro. And they're sitting there on their fucking couch or they're at their desk or wherever they're,

00:22:55.080 you know, their bed or whatever. And the whole fucking life is passing them by. You know what

00:22:59.740 I'm saying? And I think more and more people, and I talked about this for the last three years,

00:23:04.540 I think more and more people are going to start disengaging with these types of social.

00:23:08.880 people. And I think more and more people, uh, are going to value brick and mortar real life

00:23:15.200 business more. I think you're going to see, I already know brick and mortar growth is for

00:23:21.000 businesses doing it right. It's going very well right now. Um, and I think you're going to see a

00:23:26.620 lot of companies transition back, uh, from an online, like only type presence to, you know,

00:23:36.300 doing business though, kind of like what you would call the old way. I think you're going to see

00:23:40.620 clothing companies go back to cataloging. I think you're going to see people not wanting to spend

00:23:45.300 their time on social. And so companies, uh, are going to have to find, you know, creative ways,

00:23:50.080 which are the old ways of getting their attention. Right. And so I think, you know, we're going to see,

00:23:54.940 we're going to see, we're going to see a little of both. We're going to see some people dive more

00:23:58.040 into it, but I think a lot of people at this point in time, you know, we're really into,

00:24:01.900 I don't know, 13, 14 years of where most people were familiar with social, you know what I'm

00:24:09.760 saying? And the early people that were there, I mean, they've been on it for a decade going hard.

00:24:14.080 And I think a lot of people are becoming disenfranchised and disengaged with the

00:24:17.460 whole concept of like living on this fucking screen. Yeah. And so I think what you're going

00:24:21.380 to see in business, and I think it's going to come down to the companies that can adapt

00:24:25.880 to a real world scenarios. Again, I also think there's an opportunity for advertising

00:24:31.400 platforms in the real world as well to do really well again. People are rejecting the idea of the

00:24:37.500 metaverse. You know, they're not, like I told you they would, they don't want to sit at home and live

00:24:42.260 in a virtual world with some fucking goggles on. They're not going along with the 2030 agenda of

00:24:47.560 you will own nothing and like it. We're not eating fucking crickets. Like none of this shit's going

00:24:52.120 to happen, dude. And because people are going to reject the fuck out of them. And that's why you're

00:24:56.540 seeing, you know, a war being escalated because I believe that in their hopes of the ruins of the

00:25:03.600 war that they're working to create, they think they're going to take over, which ain't going to

00:25:09.220 happen then either. So like, no, these motherfuckers are going to go down swinging and they're going to

00:25:13.520 burn the fucking world up on the way out. And you know, I'm here for it. Yeah. Well, had you

00:25:18.880 listened whenever people said, Hey, don't wear the fucking mask and not complied, we wouldn't be here

00:25:23.360 right now. You know, all those people that stood up, this is for CTI, but like, I'm just being real.

00:25:28.340 All those people that stood up and say, Hey, this is bullshit. They lost their businesses, lost their

00:25:32.760 contracts, lost their fucking following, got canceled, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Um, and got

00:25:39.720 harassed for three fucking years, et cetera. Those people were right. And you motherfuckers that didn't

00:25:45.220 believe in were wrong. And these people are now telling you they're going to destroy the fucking world

00:25:49.240 to escape accountability for the crimes that they perpetrated on you. And now you don't believe

00:25:53.900 this again. You see what I'm saying? Like it, dude. And so like, that makes me think that it's

00:25:59.800 going to happen either way. And I believe that the only chance for freedom that exists in our globe

00:26:05.480 ever again, I don't know that, I don't know how this war thing is going to pan out. If someone's

00:26:10.680 going to come in and save the day, but it sure doesn't fucking feel like it's going to happen.

00:26:13.600 Yeah. And it sure does feel like this war is going to be escalated to mass fucking levels.

00:26:18.660 Like I said, you know, a few years ago. Um, and it sure does feel like, you know, what I think their

00:26:24.920 plan is, is that at the end of that, whatever is left, they're going to claim and form the one world

00:26:29.500 government that they've been trying to get through all this fucking other ways. And the very, very

00:26:33.380 elite are going to try to have all control over fucking every human being on earth. Um, and everybody

00:26:39.960 else is not going to have shit and that's their plan. And so the only chance that I see for freedom

00:26:43.460 to fucking actually, you know, truly reestablish itself is that key point when after that, when

00:26:50.860 shit is fucked up, if everybody's ready to just, you know, like at the most vulnerable time, take

00:26:55.460 it back and make it free again. But like, I'm, I'm, it's frustrating, dude. I don't know what's

00:27:00.180 going to happen. Um, it's going to be interesting. Yeah. So anyway. Yeah. Well, uh, let's talk

00:27:10.320 about how we can get better to prepare for that. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's the main point

00:27:14.820 guys is like personal excellence is the ultimate rebellion. The better you are, the less of a

00:27:19.260 customer you are for them, for all their shit. And you know, all these business trends that

00:27:23.100 we're talking about, you know, these, these it's, it's interesting how all of these things

00:27:27.940 are counter to what most of the quote unquote experts are out there saying. But then when you

00:27:33.260 look at what the experts are trying to tell people is actually happening, uh, none of that data

00:27:38.380 backs up that opinion, you know, like all the stocks of these tech companies is falling,

00:27:42.160 but the amount of people on, uh, social and the amount of people who are engaging in social is

00:27:48.240 it's, it's becoming uncool. Yeah. Right. The trend is like, like, it's almost starting to become

00:27:54.620 uncool to spend like all your time on social media. Right. And so like, you start to look at that and

00:28:00.040 then you compare that with real world data of brick and mortar companies that are operating properly,

00:28:04.620 writing a good experience, doing very well right now. Uh, I know because I own a few,

00:28:08.380 okay. And I know a bunch of people that own them as well. And you cut, you kind of put all that

00:28:14.780 shit together, bro. And I, you know, I, I feel like people want to go back to like being normal

00:28:18.920 human beings and they are tired of the shit. Yep. So we'll see. Yeah. We, uh, we shall cause it's

00:28:25.840 coming quick. Yeah. So we'll see. I think there's about, I think, I think what's actually happening

00:28:30.540 here is that there's a balance, there's a balance being created, right? Like, like people, because

00:28:39.900 this technology is so new, people have pushed so far over to one side and now people are starting

00:28:46.480 to push back. And I think what we're going to find is that there's going to be a healthy balance

00:28:51.420 where people are comfortable with a certain amount of technology in their life. Um, there is some

00:28:56.940 regulation. Yeah. And there's going to be some privacy regulations that's good. Cause like,

00:29:00.860 that's going to have to happen to save these things. Like people are not going to continue

00:29:04.440 the way to be allowed. Yeah. They're not going to like more and more people every day are starting

00:29:07.920 to realize that these tools are used to spy on us on our whole fucking lives. These, you know,

00:29:12.620 the things that Snowden was trying to tell us about how they're watching us through our computers

00:29:17.100 and they can access us even when the power cord isn't connected and look in our cameras,

00:29:21.560 that's all fucking true shit. And people, more people are starting to realize it and that's

00:29:26.440 accelerating the rejection of this technology. And I think a couple of things are going to have

00:29:30.720 to happen for technology to like, to find that balance. But I think privacy is a huge part of

00:29:36.020 it. Like there's going to have to be regulation. Like these motherfuckers should not have the right

00:29:40.720 to listen to our conversations or to fucking hack into our computers. And I'm not talking about the

00:29:46.600 media companies. I'm talking about the government or any company, anybody that we should all have an

00:29:50.860 individual sense of privacy and that should be protected by the strongest letter of the law.

00:29:58.780 Because dude, right now, like when you become aware, one of the reasons people have so much

00:30:02.380 anxiety is because they know that like you're, you can't escape it. Right. And like how many of us

00:30:08.400 voted to live like this? How many of us want to live our lives like this? I don't see anybody

00:30:12.680 fucking saying, Oh yeah, I wanted to live in a surveillance state. Govern me harder, daddy. That's

00:30:16.740 what I'm saying. And now they inched us into this under the, under the guise of,

00:30:20.860 Oh, well it's a private company. You signed in the terms and conditions. Well, that's because

00:30:25.480 there's been no regulation whatsoever. And I think a good amount, I I'm, I'm very much

00:30:30.000 anti fucking big government, but I think some fucking regulations on our own privacy and our

00:30:35.420 ability to have free speech on the technology that actually where all the conversations are

00:30:39.180 happening is a reasonable fucking thing for anybody to agree that we all need. So anyway,

00:30:45.640 let's do the questions. Cause we're 30 minutes in and bullshit guys. Let's get into this. Get to the

00:30:52.080 fucking question. Yeah. Let's get to this man. Uh, and the question of one, Andy, I found myself to

00:30:57.020 be someone who avoids conflict all the time. I hate arguing, uh, going through any type of conflict at

00:31:02.900 all. Really. Um, and when faced with a problem, I'd much rather just solve it on my own. Um, and I've

00:31:07.960 always looked at conflict as just this terrible thing to avoid. Question is, can I, should I change

00:31:14.560 this? And then what are the tips that you have to overcome this? Well, look, like I said previously,

00:31:23.520 before the question started, you know, anytime we open social media, we're inundated with conflict of

00:31:29.220 every kind. All right. We, we, we get shown the worst of the worst and the worst in society.

00:31:34.560 And then the other part of the internet is a bunch of people trying to call people out

00:31:39.060 and get clout for like fucking tearing other people down. So we're, we're looking at conflict

00:31:44.360 24 hours a day. So you have to realize in the real world, conflict is a very minimal situation.

00:31:51.460 It doesn't happen every day. It doesn't, and it doesn't happen, uh, over and over. But when we get

00:31:57.120 on social, what happens is we get so fucking inundated with it. We just kind of like freeze up

00:32:02.260 and what you have to realize is that conflict is an opportunity for growth. It's an opportunity to

00:32:10.500 improve. It's an opportunity to get better on both parties when there is a conflict. And as long as a

00:32:16.600 conflict is addressed, um, with a productive perspective, I think conflict can be a very

00:32:22.720 good thing and a healthy thing, especially inside an organization. Uh, you know, the best ideas don't

00:32:28.000 come from things going great. The best ideas come from when things are fucked up and you find this

00:32:32.320 crazy solution that is a great idea. So like, I don't think that you should, I think you need to

00:32:38.600 change your perspective on how you look at conflict and you should start looking at it instead of

00:32:42.340 taking it personal or if people don't like you, you should look at it as, okay. Um, I'm taking the

00:32:49.000 emotion out of it. I actually did an Andy Graham on this a couple of days ago, guys, about taking the

00:32:52.980 emotion out of your decision-making. I take the emotion out of it and I look at the reality.

00:32:58.520 Okay. Is this true? Yes or no. Okay. Yes, it's true. And that, that doesn't feel very good.

00:33:03.540 What can I do to fix it? How can I be better? Right. And, and, and then I take whatever I learned

00:33:09.320 from the conflict and I go be better. And that's what I've always done. Um, sometimes the person on

00:33:18.060 the other side of the conflict is going to, is you guys are going to be able to work it out.

00:33:21.320 Sometimes, you know, people aren't in a place where they want to work things out.

00:33:25.860 I found that most of the time when you're honest with people and you treat them with respect,

00:33:29.800 there's an amicable compromise that can come that we're both people respect each other,

00:33:35.820 feel heard, feel valued and walk away better from conflict. You know, some of my best friends

00:33:41.580 in the world are people I didn't even like in the beginning when I met them. Right. So like we have

00:33:46.300 to understand that conflict can have a lot of healthy outcomes, but it's up to you to, to make

00:33:55.920 them healthy, you know, cause you want to always see eye to eye with other people. You're not always

00:34:00.720 going to be able to get a handshake and a hug when it's over with most of the time. Yeah. But

00:34:05.180 sometimes no, I wouldn't want to. Yeah. Well, that's you, but a lot of people have, you're not

00:34:10.300 a people pleaser in that way, bro. Like you're, you're a man who stands on his own values and when

00:34:14.780 right's right and wrong is wrong. And that's something that you're comfortable doing. But

00:34:18.660 there's a lot of people out there that have a really hard time when people like have, like this

00:34:23.500 person here, this person, you got to understand what they're talking about is like paralyzing fear

00:34:29.520 of someone not liking them or agreeing with them or seeing things with their perspective,

00:34:33.860 which is a very hard way to go through life because that's not reality. And so, you know,

00:34:40.560 and, and, and dude, I'm one of those people, like I'm a person where I, you know, as much as like you

00:34:46.280 guys think, Oh, it's fuck, you know, fuck everybody that I had to develop that part of me, but that's

00:34:51.620 what I had to develop my natural inclination. When I was a young person before I developed the

00:34:57.980 boundaries and understanding of when to fuck off with someone or when to listen. Right.

00:35:03.280 My natural inclination was to always have my feelings hurt when people fucking didn't see

00:35:07.760 eye to eye with me. I took a very personal and that comes from me not being secure with who I am.

00:35:12.800 And so I can, I can empathize with someone who struggles with this because when I was younger,

00:35:18.120 uh, in my teenage years, especially I really struggled with this. And, uh, I think a lot of

00:35:23.320 people struggle with this, but I think the, the, the key to getting through it and growing is to

00:35:29.280 understand that, that conflict you have to do, you do the best you can. When you, when you make

00:35:34.540 mistakes, be humble enough to say, okay, I can fix that. Um, regardless if you make it right with

00:35:39.660 the other person or not, because sometimes people won't allow you to make it right. All right. So

00:35:43.780 you got to take the lessons that you learn, you make them right. You improve as a person and you

00:35:47.160 grow. And along the way there's, you know, especially in business, you're going to have

00:35:51.460 situations where you do everything right. And the, the person's still going to hate you for some,

00:35:57.960 whatever fucking reason, bro. And sometimes those people come around years later and they say, well,

00:36:02.740 dude, I was wrong or whatever. So the only thing that we can really worry about is like ourselves,

00:36:07.340 what we learned from the conflict, how we can actually get better. And I think it's a good idea

00:36:12.520 to try and make it right with people. When you have these conflicts, depending on what kind of

00:36:16.840 conflict it is. Cause there is a time where, you know, someone is clearly the fuck out of line

00:36:21.460 and you got to hold a fucking standard. And if you don't hold a standard at that point,

00:36:25.380 people will walk all over you. So there's, that's a huge reality as well. A lot of people get walked

00:36:30.340 all over because they're so afraid of conflict that they won't set up any kind of boundary whatsoever.

00:36:35.800 So like you have to be, you have to be the judge of this scenario. Like you've got to tell

00:36:42.180 yourself the truth. This is why being a realist is so important. Like, cause sometimes

00:36:46.820 times, especially the bigger you get in business, people are going to criticize you for shit that

00:36:50.940 ain't even fucking true. Okay. And like, dude, when you're someone who's trying, and by the way,

00:36:55.680 this all conflicts, this all conflicts into like this big mess, because the reason that you got

00:37:00.200 big in the first place is because you give a fuck about people. Okay. So you care a lot. That's why

00:37:05.980 you're successful. Then you get to a point where you get so big that people start trying to poke holes

00:37:10.500 in your shit just because you're shining in a way that they may not like. All right. So you've got to

00:37:16.060 figure out like, is this person actually have a legitimate gripe? Is this something I could do

00:37:22.500 better? Is this my fault or are they out of line? Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And so like, dude,

00:37:28.680 there's truth to all of that. And you, I think the best thing that someone can do is really train

00:37:34.140 themselves to see the reality of the situation and remove themselves from their own perspective in it

00:37:40.220 and remove and try to put yourself over in this perspective as well. Right? Like walking a mile

00:37:45.380 in someone else's shoes is a pretty good idea when you have a conflict with them. Yeah. You see what

00:37:49.320 I'm saying? A lot of people forget that shit because they're so mad and they're so angry,

00:37:52.800 but being able to look at it. So like what I try to do, dude, in these situations, like if I find

00:37:59.020 myself in a situation, you know, which happens quite often when you're running a fucking bunch

00:38:04.720 of shit, you know, and you know, the conflicts are waiting on you. Yeah. Like it's, it's, it's

00:38:10.580 normal shit. And like, but like, dude, I used to be like this person where I would like paralyze

00:38:15.120 me. Right. And so like, I've grown a lot in that regard where now I'm like, okay, well, what is it?

00:38:20.460 What's going on? Okay. Is that true? No, it's not true. Okay. Well, this person's just doesn't

00:38:26.180 understand. Try to talk to them. If they're like, fuck you. Well, there's nothing I can do about

00:38:29.540 that. Right. All I can do is do my best, my real best, not fucking bullshit best. Yeah. There's

00:38:33.980 a difference. But what I try to do in a little hack that I think is valuable for all of you guys

00:38:38.760 is to like, look at the situation as if you're observing two other people. So, so like, if you

00:38:44.100 can like see the conflict that you're currently in and you can like observe it as if it's two

00:38:49.160 different people that you're not, it's not you and it's not them, but it's these two other people

00:38:52.920 and you kind of observe this thing, it gives you a good perspective of what the truth actually

00:38:59.700 is. Yeah. Right. So, um, that's a hack I've used. And I, I, you know, I also use that hack

00:39:07.780 by the way, when I got to make hard decisions, like when I have to make difficult decisions,

00:39:11.240 dude, I don't, I don't think of it. Like it's me. I think of it. Like I work for this guy named

00:39:17.100 Andy, who's over there, who has all these goals, all these obligations, all these dreams.

00:39:23.180 And I have to make a decision that's in this, in the best interest of over here. Okay. Uh,

00:39:29.340 whether it's hard or not hard, I have to do what the fucking right thing. And so like when

00:39:34.100 I, when I have to make hard decisions or have conversations that aren't, that aren't fun

00:39:37.860 to have, I try to remember like, okay, I worked for this other dude over here. Yeah. I got

00:39:42.560 to do a fucking job. That's powerful. Yeah. So there's some free game for you guys. Yeah. No

00:39:47.960 shit. It's very helpful. Yeah. Uh, any question number two, Andy, I am a musician, a rapper

00:39:54.320 specifically. Um, I put a lot of effort and energy into making the best quality music and

00:40:00.140 content I can with the resources I currently have. Even still in the past, when I would

00:40:05.120 drop content, I would be discouraged by the results or lack thereof. Yeah. Um, by listening

00:40:10.600 to you, I've learned to understand that the journey to success is a long road and consistency

00:40:15.300 and persistence is key. Um, but I'm curious, what, what would you say to yourself to keep

00:40:21.140 showing up every single day when you went through a similar period in your early days

00:40:24.860 of business? Um, this is something I know a lot of creative struggle with. So I would

00:40:28.680 like to know your input. Um, what do you tell yourself to keep you going through the days?

00:40:31.980 It's not what I tell myself. It's what I asked myself. What's my life going to be like

00:40:36.720 if I quit? That's why I asked myself, what's my life going to look like if I quit to this

00:40:42.100 day? To this day, that's how I, I asked myself, I asked myself the same thing today. Uh, okay.

00:40:49.180 Like, like, dude, real talk. You think I want to come back in on fucking Monday morning after

00:40:52.780 being in Mexico for a fucking week? No. Well, I'm just saying like you're walking, I'm walking.

00:40:57.520 I already know what I'm walking into, which is a whole, cause like, look, dude, my prop,

00:41:01.080 my job is to solve the fucking problems. All right. Cause you're not there. By the way,

00:41:06.380 I don't solve the little problems. Those all get solved by our amazing people here.

00:41:10.640 Right. Right. So by the time it comes to me, guess what kind of problem it is? It's a fucking

00:41:16.780 stressful problem. It's a train derailment, right? Yeah, that's right. Too soon. Yeah. It didn't

00:41:20.640 exist. You know, our fucking president rather go over to Ukraine. That's the other episode. Sorry,

00:41:26.500 guys. That's unacceptable by the way. It is. It is. But I got a lot to say about that motherfucking

00:41:32.720 that's bullshit. Oh yeah. But, uh, but look, dude, you know, I know what I'm walking into and I know

00:41:40.320 it's going to, I know I'm getting the fucking hammer broke. Cause that's what my job is,

00:41:44.440 is to get the fucking hammer. And, um, you know, so I was nervous and I had a little anxiety. I'm

00:41:50.500 like, Oh fuck, this is weird. You know? And, but the truth is, is like, you know, I'm like,

00:41:54.800 fuck dude, I, I could stay home. Right. I could have not went. I could have said, Hey,

00:42:01.720 I'm not going in. Like I don't have to fucking come here. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I

00:42:08.080 fucking was sitting there and I'm like, well, if I don't go today, that means I'm less likely to go

00:42:13.040 next week when we have another meeting. That means the week after that, I'm going to blow that off.

00:42:17.420 I'd rather not start this. We got a lot to do. I got a lot of responsibility.

00:42:22.140 What's going to happen if I let this go? Right. Guess what I did? Got the fuck up,

00:42:27.480 got in the shower and got my fucking ass here and I gave the meeting, you know? Yeah. You know? So

00:42:32.120 like I try to tie in if I were you and, and, and this is what has always worked for me. You know,

00:42:39.820 I don't evaluate the risk of doing, I, I evaluate the risk of not doing. And so, you know, when you're

00:42:47.920 struggling and when you're young and you're not getting the attention, like, dude, it's hard.

00:42:51.220 It's hard. Like, especially like for young people now, because the internet's been

00:42:57.280 around for a minute, like it, and this is, this is just true shit. And I don't care what anybody

00:43:01.860 says. People can fucking argue this all day, but like, it was much easier to gain a following in

00:43:06.700 the earlier days of the internet. Right. It would, now you have everybody sort of, it's the game has

00:43:14.100 been discovered and like, it's still early and I think it will evolve. Like I said, in the last

00:43:19.700 question, but I mean, it's, there's so many fucking people doing the shit on the internet at a

00:43:26.300 functional level that it's hard to stand out back in the beginning. You, you, you could

00:43:31.660 just, you could be, there was more diversity in content too. Now, now I see everybody doing

00:43:38.420 the exact same. Like I see all these motherfuckers doing these videos now where they're sitting

00:43:43.220 in front of a microphone, like they're on a fucking podcast when there's not even have

00:43:46.080 a fucking podcast. They just have a microphone. Yeah, bro. Like, look, dude, that there's not

00:43:51.420 a hack to this. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like this is years and years and years of anything,

00:43:56.160 just like whatever it is they're good at. You understand what I'm saying? Yeah. So like,

00:44:00.720 we have to understand that like content creation and getting a following and all that shit is,

00:44:06.940 it's much harder now than it was then. And so it's easier for people who were like in this person's

00:44:12.680 situation, uh, to feel fucking demoralized. Cause it takes, you know, time to do this. And you see all

00:44:19.640 these other people who are probably not even as good as you are at what you do, getting far more

00:44:25.060 credit and appraise. And I think the thing that to remember here is that this is a game of longevity.

00:44:30.340 This is a game of continuing to push, continuing to grow. The journey that you're on is going to

00:44:37.880 produce the ultimate version of you, which is what you're after anyway, because the skills that you

00:44:44.220 have right now are only going to get better. They're only going to be honed more. They're only going to

00:44:49.000 develop more, the more you keep trying. And like, dude, here's the truth too. As many people that are

00:44:54.100 fucking doing this, most people still won't even make content because they're fucking afraid of what

00:44:59.380 the boogeyman might have to say about them. Right. So like, dude, the fact that you're in the fucking

00:45:04.580 game, even after all this time and you feel like demoralized, you're still incredibly ahead of everybody

00:45:10.500 else, bro. That's a big fucking deal. And so, you know, I see this all the time and I see, you know,

00:45:16.520 what's one, one, one cool way to think about it too, is like, dude, Tik TOK's a great way to build

00:45:21.080 a following. Like I don't do Tik TOK personally. Um, because I kind of let everybody else just share

00:45:27.720 out my shit. Uh, and I'm not interested in doing another social media platform, but the, the amount

00:45:35.040 of growth that you can see on Tik TOK, because the fucking algorithm is pretty open. It, you could

00:45:41.600 build a massive following pretty quick there. Uh, however, you know, you have to deal with the

00:45:45.940 fucking, with it being a Chinese spyware, which is what the fuck it is. And like, there's other

00:45:49.980 negatives to it too. And that's another reason why I don't fucking do it. But like, you know,

00:45:55.580 comparing yourself to people who've been doing shit for a long time is always demoralizing, bro.

00:45:59.740 Like I can remember back when I was, you know, in 2000, I can remember that dude, this is,

00:46:04.760 this is a real story. I remember back in 2000 fucking 10, 2009, 2010, I had this idea

00:46:10.960 that I went and spoke, I went and spoke to this big company about that was much, I mean,

00:46:15.380 a big, big company at the time. And, um, I showed my idea. I said, I said, this is,

00:46:22.800 this is how the industry lays. This is what, what you guys could do to change it. And we'd

00:46:28.140 like to be a little part of it. You know, we don't, we didn't have the money or the capacity

00:46:32.180 or the resources to like do this. So I brought this idea to this company and they fucking laughed

00:46:36.940 us out the room, bro. They laughed us out the room. You know what he said? He said, well,

00:46:40.800 if you think that's such a good idea, you should go do it yourself. Guess what the fuck I did.

00:46:44.580 Now I'm here. See what I'm saying? But that shit hurt. And that shit fucking made me sad.

00:46:49.900 And it made me feel like a fucking loser. And so like a lot of the things that you're going

00:46:53.660 through right now, feeling demoralized and feeling like you're disrespected, those things will

00:46:57.920 actually carry you to success. It's part of the game. Fuck. Yeah, bro. You think I don't have a

00:47:01.960 massive chip on my shoulder, even though I proved those motherfuckers wrong. You don't think I

00:47:05.800 fucking love the fact that if I went and talked to the person who said that I say, Hey bro,

00:47:10.120 remember when you said this and this and this, and he'd be like, fuck. Yeah, I know that was

00:47:14.060 fuck. Well, you went out and did it. You know, like I think about that. Like, you know, it sounds

00:47:18.720 fucked up, but it's truth. Like, and dude, all these disrespectful things and all these slights

00:47:24.320 and all these things, those things will come together if you allow them to, uh, as a really

00:47:30.040 great source of fuel for you to continue to push down the, down the road, which I think is necessary.

00:47:34.700 Yeah. You know, I think negative energy is the most powerful energy that you could fucking,

00:47:39.000 if you can absorb it, if you can control it and convert it into something positive,

00:47:43.500 it's the most powerful energy. It's way more powerful than positive energy.

00:47:47.580 It'll drive you to work much harder. And dude, you can talk about metaphysical, quantum physical,

00:47:52.660 spiritual beliefs, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. But at the end of the day, bro,

00:47:56.240 you got to put motherfucking rubber to the road, which means you got to fucking work.

00:47:59.260 Okay. In the real world out here, real life, you got to fucking work not here here. Right. And

00:48:07.180 it's a massive, it's a massive, it's a massive compliment to, to this person that they are even

00:48:18.580 moving that direction. In my opinion, you know, I think there's so much to be said

00:48:24.080 for the people who just fucking try, dude, like so many people, like think of all the great

00:48:30.700 inventions. Think of all the great businesses. Think of all the great solutions. Think of all

00:48:36.020 the greatness period that is left on the fucking table because people are fucking afraid of what's

00:48:43.600 going to happen to them on social media, or they're afraid to be called a name. They're afraid

00:48:47.720 to be made fun of, or they're afraid to be canceled. This is one of the biggest fucking dangers of

00:48:51.940 cancel culture. This is why you shouldn't participate in it. Even when it's fucking,

00:48:55.560 you know, not your, your side or the other side, like it's not a good thing in society.

00:49:01.920 Yeah. Um, it should be reserved. Cancel culture should be reserved for the harshest things.

00:49:07.780 You know, part of the reason the harshest things are being allowed to happen now, like such as the

00:49:12.760 sexualization of children, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, pedophilia being normalized, which is really

00:49:17.740 happening globally. The reason that's allowed to happen is because there's a space being made for

00:49:23.220 it. Because when people cancel fucking Joe Blow for doing whatever Joe Blow does, they it's, it's,

00:49:32.820 it's the same thing as like when everything is a certain way, then nothing is a certain way.

00:49:37.620 So like if everything is cancelable, then when you try to cancel fucking Balenciaga for what they did,

00:49:42.940 it doesn't fucking work. It's a boy who cries wolf. Yeah. And so like as society, one of the

00:49:48.780 changes that I think we need to make is we need to be even more selective about where the fuck we

00:49:52.560 take that power. Um, but because of that power and because it's misused and because it's become a

00:49:59.320 societal norm and it is a weapon, it's a fucking social weapon. It's meant to divide. This, this was

00:50:05.880 not, this cancel culture was propagated and inserted into our society intentionally. Okay. And,

00:50:12.940 and the reason is so that we all fucking argue. And so we're all afraid and we're afraid to speak

00:50:17.300 up. We're afraid to say shit. Right. But, but here's a, here's a side effect of it that no one

00:50:21.380 really talks about. It's like young people like this. Um, like that's what I'm saying. This person

00:50:26.440 deserves a lot of credit, but it's, it's people who have greatness inside of them. They're afraid

00:50:30.500 to get off the fucking bench because of the abnormal situation of cancel culture in society.

00:50:35.700 See what I'm saying? Like we're missing out on a lot of fucking greatness because

00:50:39.700 culminated with the idea that it's supposed to be quick and easy. Yeah. Well, yeah, that's a whole

00:50:43.880 nother discussion. Yeah, man. But like, you know, people I'm, you know, I'm a huge anti-cancel

00:50:50.440 culture type person. And, uh, you know, I think we, as a society need to do a better job of like

00:50:56.800 giving people grace when they make a mistake or when something, you know, uh, when they fuck up or

00:51:04.500 whatever, right. And being able to delineate if it's just a one or a two time mistake or something

00:51:10.200 or if they're an evil person, I think cancel culture should be completely fucking redirected

00:51:15.680 and utilized for evil things. You know, we have fucking communism happening in this country.

00:51:19.940 That's a big fucking problem. I don't see no cancel culture there. That's what I'm saying,

00:51:23.080 bro. Well, that's because they're the motherfuckers that inserted the cancel culture. Well, and they

00:51:27.380 censored the ones that, yeah, that's another episode guys. Well, people need to know it.

00:51:32.480 Anyway, the point is, well, the point is just keep going, dude. And like, and you know, ask

00:51:40.040 yourself, what's my life really going to be like if I don't do this? Because here's the story I tell

00:51:45.180 myself what my life's going to be like. And at this point, it's no longer true because I have so many

00:51:49.680 skills. Like people pay me to fucking teach their skill sets. Right. So like I got job security for

00:51:55.160 fucking ever. All right. Uh, but what I tell myself is like when I was telling myself about getting out

00:52:01.380 of bed and coming up and, you know, facing my responsibilities is, um, bro, if you don't,

00:52:07.740 you're going to be digging ditches because when I started, when I started this company,

00:52:11.660 if it didn't work, that's what I would have been doing. And so I imagine myself having to get up

00:52:17.220 at fucking four o'clock in the morning, put on my work shit and go to fucking work. Like,

00:52:23.080 like real work, not fucking this bullshit work that we all know.

00:52:27.020 Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And even though it's not a true story anymore,

00:52:31.640 I still tell myself because that's what the fuck works for me. You know what I'm saying? So you

00:52:36.680 got to find something that is probably true. You know, like for you, it might be, you'd be working

00:52:42.720 at McDonald's, cooking French fries and shit. No disrespect to those people that work at

00:52:46.260 McDonald's, but McDonald's probably for most people, isn't a career job. You know what I'm saying?

00:52:51.560 Or a choice. Yeah. So like we got to, we got to tell ourselves the right story.

00:52:56.740 It gets fucking moving. And the story I told myself is if I don't keep going, bro,

00:53:00.080 I'm going to dig ditches. And what I'm describing now in terms of, uh, what we're talking about is

00:53:06.200 what I call zero options mentality, because it's easy to have zero options mentality when you actually

00:53:11.040 have zero options. Right. Like when you're in the beginning, you're where this person is

00:53:14.580 and shit, like you don't have an option. Like, fuck dude, it's easy to believe it. Right.

00:53:19.160 It's easy to believe. Like it was easy to believe in my first year of business that if I

00:53:23.060 fucking fail, I'd be digging ditches as easy to fucking believe. Guess what?

00:53:26.740 It was true. Yeah. Right. You really would have been. Yeah, that's right.

00:53:30.020 So today, you know, here I am 24 years later. Right. I've done pretty well in business by all

00:53:36.160 accords and all standards. Right. I got a long way to go. I got a lot to do, but I'm

00:53:39.940 been doing okay.

00:53:41.440 I have to kind of lie to myself. You know what I'm saying? I have to say, bro, if you

00:53:47.860 don't fucking get your fucking ass out of bed, bro, and now it's not just, you're going

00:53:51.400 to be digging ditches, but all the motherfuckers that depend on you, they're going to be digging

00:53:54.320 ditches too, which I think that's even scarier. Fuck. Yeah. It is. Yeah. That's what people

00:53:58.080 don't get, dude. That's a whole different type of pressure, bro. It is. And it never stops

00:54:01.900 and it's real. It's, if you're not a piece of shit, it's real. Right. Right. You know,

00:54:06.320 guys, the third and final question, Andy, uh, question number three, um, let's close

00:54:12.780 it out. Andy, in a recent CTI episode, you spoke about giving, especially when you don't

00:54:17.980 have much to give and the power that it creates in the universe. When you do it, I've also

00:54:22.660 heard you mentioned not helping people when they just ask for it because hard times is

00:54:27.260 what forges toughness and teaches lessons. Can you expand more on these views, um, on

00:54:34.200 when or what circumstances should align to truly give or help someone?

00:54:39.820 Man, that's such a good question. I don't even know how to answer that to be honest.

00:54:43.720 Uh, because it's, it's, it's, I think it's a nuanced question. I think there's a time and

00:54:48.660 place for both. I think that you have to learn to see the truth of the situation. Is this a

00:54:54.600 situation where this person genuinely needs help and are they someone who deserves help? Do they live

00:55:03.440 a good life? Are they a good person? Um, cause everybody needs a hand sometimes that's reality,

00:55:09.260 bro. I've, I've had a little help. Everybody's had a little help along the way. Okay. In different

00:55:13.840 ways. I'm not talking about money. I'm talking about in just different ways, all kinds of ways.

00:55:17.680 Um, sometimes it's important to be that helpful people. So I think it's important to evaluate each

00:55:24.220 situation on a case by case scenario. And, uh, when it's an honest thing, I think, I think,

00:55:31.340 you know, you should do the good thing. Um, I think there's other scenarios that where you may

00:55:39.580 have a, you know, and most of the time in these scenarios, I think it's, you know, you have a

00:55:44.880 somewhat of a relationship with someone, meaning, you know, them and you know a little bit about them

00:55:51.240 and they get themselves in a fucking pickle and you have to sort of look at the context of their

00:55:57.260 behavior over the course of time to understand, is this pickle there? Is this going to hurt them

00:56:07.000 or damage them? Or is this something that they need to be hurt and damaged by so that they don't

00:56:11.440 do a bigger mistake later? And so some thought needs to go into these things on an individual

00:56:15.800 basis. And I think it's, you know, it definitely is a conflicting viewpoint a little bit, but I think

00:56:21.360 it's because there's nuance and I think there's no blanket answer. There's not just a catch all.

00:56:26.320 No, I don't think so. I mean, I think. Well, that makes sense. Yeah. I can think of, I think,

00:56:30.560 I can think of scenarios many different ways where, um, bad advice would, would not be the truth.

00:56:37.420 Right. Um, I think that's a great fucking question. I wish you guys would ask more questions like

00:56:42.340 that. That's a good fucking question. It actually makes me fucking think.

00:56:45.800 You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Like I should really fucking think about that because

00:56:48.740 I think the way I do it is like, I'm describing, like, I'm just trying to reflect back in my head,

00:56:53.600 like how, how I do it. And I think it's, you know, the times I haven't helped people because I thought

00:56:59.780 they needed to learn the lesson that also came from a place of love. It didn't come from a place

00:57:06.500 of like, I'm going to teach you this. No, no. And that's it. Like I'm trying to operate with

00:57:11.820 the best intention for the scenario. And sometimes dude, and I've learned this, like I've, I've made

00:57:18.940 this mistake before where I've helped people and it kept them from learning a lesson that was

00:57:24.320 important for them to learn. And then they ended up making that same mistake only way bigger later

00:57:29.360 down the road. And like it fucking buried them. Or you got the end of the karmic stick.

00:57:33.500 Like, well, yeah, bro. Yeah. Right. And that's a whole nother thing. It's like, dude, you know,

00:57:37.400 like Malik fucking taught me. This is a powerful thing that Malik taught me was that sometimes you

00:57:45.060 can't step in front of karma because when you step in front of the karma, you're the one that gets

00:57:48.420 delivered the fucking blow. It's gotta go somewhere. Right. And so like, and I believe there's some to

00:57:52.540 that too, you know? And that's why I say you have to look at the context, right? Like dude, it's hard.

00:57:59.760 It's a hard, it's a hard, but dude, you know, doing the right thing isn't easy. You have to

00:58:04.480 put some fucking thought into it. For sure. For sure. You know, I think the intent matters a lot.

00:58:08.920 I think when you, when you can help someone and choose not to, um, you have to understand that

00:58:15.580 it's probably not going to seen as be seen from their point of view as loving, right? Like this part

00:58:20.440 of like probably a lot of parents relate to this shit. Right. Um, but down the road, you know,

00:58:27.040 hopefully they understand that sometimes, you know, they don't. And I think it's important that

00:58:31.580 you make the right decision so that you can live with a clear conscience about how you handle these

00:58:36.360 situations. Because even if you try like, bro, I try really fucking hard to do what's right. Um,

00:58:42.940 by every single person that comes across my face and even trying as hard as I can, there's still

00:58:49.620 going to be people that don't value that or don't see it that way. And we're appreciate it. Yeah. And

00:58:55.740 that's the reality of life. And so I think we all have to understand that not everybody's in the

00:59:00.800 same place or the same vibe or the same fucking plane that you're on at this time. And so that's

00:59:06.300 why I think it's important for you to do the thing that you're going to feel best about to

00:59:09.520 understand and do it. And not, not the weak thing either. Cause the weak thing is, is to never,

00:59:14.040 is to always help everybody. But what ends up happening is you end up handicapping a lot of

00:59:18.900 fucking people by being that way. Yeah. And that's a very, like, that's something that took me until

00:59:23.640 I was probably 38, 39, maybe 40 years old to truly understand because I didn't grow up like,

00:59:30.300 like in a situation where I help a lot of people. Right. But when I, when I started to do well in

00:59:34.940 business, that changed. And like, you start, you start doing so well that you can solve people's

00:59:41.280 problems and it's very little rub on your end. Like it doesn't, it doesn't hurt to, you're not

00:59:46.720 missing the fucking money. Yeah. This massive pain point over here can be fixed. But yes. So like,

00:59:51.500 it's like this very weird thing to like reconcile. It doesn't fucking hurt you. It's easy for you.

00:59:58.860 Right. And it solves this person's bad problem immediately. Yes. And so, but the problem is,

01:00:06.960 is like, dude, people will sniff that the fuck out and then they become the people who take

01:00:11.860 advantage of you very quickly. I'll try to get more of those situations. Yeah, bro. And so like,

01:00:16.240 dude, you gotta, you gotta know where those boundaries are. And it's a, it's a, it's a tough place.

01:00:20.740 And it's not, that's why most that's this real talk. This is why most wealthy, successful people

01:00:26.260 that you know, do not allow people access to them. This is why very well insulated. Yes. This is why

01:00:32.500 famous people act the way they act. This is why they're cold. It's not because they think less of

01:00:37.120 you. Well, some of them probably do because they're assholes, but you know, it's it, you know, a lot of

01:00:42.760 these people are just trying not to get fucking their heartstrings pulled and taken advantage of

01:00:46.920 because it happens so regularly. Right. And this is like, you know, what they try to tell these

01:00:52.540 dudes in the NFL, they try to tell them this shit, you know, to protect themselves, insulate

01:00:57.440 themselves and they don't fucking listen. And what ends up happening is they end up on a 30 for 30

01:01:01.700 episode because they gave all their money away to their homies because they were trying to help

01:01:05.880 them when their homies stopped giving a fuck. How much money can they took? Because dude, to those

01:01:10.180 dudes, you got a money tree in your backyard that you could just go in the back and pull shit off

01:01:14.200 of. Yep. And like, they don't, they don't think about all the time that this dude, you

01:01:18.240 know, whether it be business or athletics, you know, from the time they were young, putting

01:01:22.180 in all those hours, they didn't get paid for years and years and years, years of work, you

01:01:26.300 know, people just don't care and they stop caring real quick when you give money. More importantly,

01:01:32.140 stop caring when you stop. Oh, well, that's the other thing is like they, you, you, you know,

01:01:37.880 people will, you can't get out of that cycle once it starts, you know, and let, and

01:01:44.200 it's definitely, it's definitely a weird, weird thing. I had an uncle tell me, he was

01:01:49.180 like, well, if you could, if you could do it without me, then I'm not going to do it

01:01:53.720 for you. Like if I wasn't here and you could still solve that problem, you're going to

01:01:56.840 solve that problem. Well, I think that's a good, that's a good way to be. Like a nice

01:01:59.900 little rule of thumb, I guess. Yeah. I mean, that's definitely great. I think that's pretty

01:02:03.280 solid advice, bro. Yeah. Oh yeah. And that, that's probably the best advice that we gave

01:02:07.260 on the whole show right there. I'm just saying, you know, it's, that's just a tough

01:02:13.320 scenario and the more success you have and the more success people recognize that you

01:02:20.680 have, the harder that gets. Yeah. That's real, man. But as hard as it is, it's still better

01:02:27.140 than the problems that you have when you don't have shit. That's real, bro. That's real shit,

01:02:30.980 man. Well, guys, Andy, that was three. Yeah. Don't pay the fee. Yep. Don't be a hoe. Share the show.

01:02:36.720 Yeah. Went from sleeping on the floor. Now my jewelry box froze. Fuck a pole. Fuck a stole.

01:02:42.420 Counted millions in the code. Bad bitch. Booty swole. Got her on bankroll. Can't fold.

01:02:48.300 That's a no. Headshot. Case closed.

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - February 22, 2023

476. Q&AF： Getting Comfortable With Conflict, Pushing Through Discouragement & Lessons In Giving

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