REAL AF with Andy Frisella - September 14, 2023


573. Fueling The Process Of Dominating Your Life


Episode Stats

Length

12 minutes

Words per Minute

163.7346

Word Count

2,091

Sentence Count

119

Misogynist Sentences

1

Hate Speech Sentences

2


Summary

In this episode, I talk about the first few years of my business life when people around me thought I was full of shit, and how to deal with the criticism from people who don t believe in you. As you grow, as you become more successful, and as it becomes clear that you are actually going to create something, the conversation starts to change.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What is up guys, it's Andy Priscilla, this is the show for the realists, say goodbye
00:00:20.380 to the lies, the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking
00:00:24.740 reality. Guys, as you know, this is a personal development business entrepreneurship podcast
00:00:31.360 at the core and today I'm going to bring you a little bit of real talk that I think needs
00:00:35.760 to be had. You know, when I started in business guys, everybody laughed at me. All my friends,
00:00:46.040 virtually all my family, virtually everybody I know, they laughed in my face, okay? They
00:00:53.520 said things like, that's never going to work. Who do you think you are? What do you think
00:00:59.500 is going to happen here? That's not how it's supposed to be done. It's supposed to be done
00:01:06.080 like this. You don't have the skills. You don't have the money. You don't have the connections.
00:01:12.800 How are you going to actually do this? And those conversations went on for years. And
00:01:23.560 the reason I wanted to talk about this today is because I see a lot of you young people
00:01:27.420 out here trying to build something, something that you believe in, something that you see
00:01:33.920 in your mind and believe in your heart. And I understand what it's like to have those visions
00:01:40.780 and have every single person around you think that you're full of shit. All right. So I want to
00:01:48.420 talk to you guys for a minute. As I just said, this part of the journey is in my opinion, the hardest
00:01:57.620 part, because you have this idea, you have this dream, you have this vision that nobody else can
00:02:04.220 see. Your friends can't see it. Your family can't see it. Motherfuckers on the internet sure as fuck
00:02:10.280 can't see it. And you don't have any reason or any credibility to stand on and say, see, I can do this.
00:02:16.620 So it makes it extremely hard. But I want to remind you as someone who's been down the gauntlet
00:02:22.620 of this process, that those conversations change. And as you become more and more successful,
00:02:30.400 if you are willing to ignore the criticisms of these people, the conversation will start to sound
00:02:37.640 like this. Oh, hey, man, are you still working on that thing? Man, that's pretty cool, man. Hey,
00:02:46.400 you think you could make a donation to my kid's softball team? You think you could buy a table for
00:02:51.980 our trivia night? And the conversation starts to change until you say you're going to build it
00:02:59.420 bigger and better. And this was very, very, very much the exact scenario of what it was like for me.
00:03:06.980 My first year, my first day, I sold $7 the first day. The second day, I didn't sell anything. The third
00:03:15.300 day, I sold $23. And it took me eight months to have a day of $200. So you can imagine,
00:03:21.980 what that felt like as an entrepreneur. It felt like failure. All right, I wasn't getting paid.
00:03:28.140 All my friends were laughing at me. All my family was telling me to get serious, get realistic,
00:03:33.600 get a real job, grow the fuck up. And I'm in here every day at my little vitamin shop,
00:03:38.920 trying to do the best that I can to make something happen. I'm going out door to door. I'm going up and
00:03:45.980 down the streets. Back then, we didn't have social media. So you had to do things like go door to door.
00:03:50.680 And I'm thankful for that opportunity because it taught me some pretty valuable skills. But that's
00:03:55.440 neither here nor there. The point is, we're all out here trying as hard as we can. And we face a
00:04:01.380 literal tsunami of negative conversation, negative talk and negative criticisms. And it doesn't always
00:04:09.840 stay that way. All right. As you grow up, as you get bigger, as you become more successful,
00:04:16.000 as it becomes evident that you're actually going to create something, the conversation is going to
00:04:21.500 change. But by the time that it changes, you are going to not give a shit what these people had to
00:04:27.760 say about it. All right. So if this is you and you're struggling and you're fighting and you're in
00:04:34.860 the fight, understand that facing this issue of non-believers of critiques and criticisms and
00:04:44.000 negativity is part of the process. And a big reason why people can't build businesses, a big reason why
00:04:50.380 they can't follow through to create success for themselves is because they don't have the capacity
00:04:55.780 to push through this initial phase. And this initial phase is justified. All right. A lot of us blame
00:05:02.820 these people. They blame them for not believing in them or, you know, doubting them. But if we're
00:05:10.440 really honest with ourselves, what have we given these people as evidence to show that we are
00:05:16.900 actually capable of completing the task at hand? We haven't given them anything yet. So they can't
00:05:23.800 believe in it. And since you're the only one that can see the vision and you're the only one that can
00:05:28.600 believe in the vision, how can you blame them? Because they can't crack open your head and look
00:05:33.180 inside and say, Oh, there it is. They can't crack open your heart and look inside and say, Oh,
00:05:37.720 he has what it takes. They're going to doubt. They're not going to believe because here's the thing.
00:05:44.380 Stepping outside the framework of normalcy is always going to be questioned because most people
00:05:51.660 live inside that framework their entire lives. And as you step outside and as you venture more and
00:05:59.000 more and more down the own path that you know that you're supposed to go down, you're going to face
00:06:05.040 more and more criticism. And there's two kinds of people. There's the people that win and there's the
00:06:11.140 people that lose. And the people that win have something in common when it comes to this level
00:06:16.740 of criticism, they very simply understand this. Every single bit of criticism, every single bit
00:06:24.540 of negativity, every single bit of doubt, every single negative comment, every single person that
00:06:30.820 says, I can't do this. You fucking won't do this, or this could never happen. Those go into a bank
00:06:38.200 on your shoulder and it becomes this giant chip. And every time you're tired, every time you're frustrated,
00:06:46.180 every time you want to fucking quit, you remember what these people say. And winners understand that
00:06:54.380 this is some of the most valuable fuel that you could ever have. Now, the other kind of people,
00:07:01.080 the people who lose, those people will listen to these people who are bound by the restrictions and
00:07:08.220 the rails of normalcy for their entire existence. And they will listen to the criticism. They will
00:07:15.620 listen to the doubt. They will listen to the hate. And eventually they will give into that and they
00:07:20.300 will accept their reality to be one of normalcy. They will step back inside the rails of normalcy
00:07:27.920 so that they can gain the acceptance of all their normal friends and family, AKA they're going to give
00:07:35.100 up on their whole entire life, their whole entire dreams, their entire future, because they couldn't
00:07:40.780 get past the doubt that the people who are confined to this prison of normalcy for their entire lives
00:07:47.980 put on them. So those are your choices because anything that you do great, anything that you do
00:07:56.460 outside the realm of normalcy is going to be criticized. And how you respond to that criticism
00:08:02.580 is ultimately going to be what pushes you down the path or forces you back within the confines
00:08:09.440 of a normal life. And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with normal life, except if you
00:08:16.300 have those dreams and you have those goals and you have this vision for yourself, and then you sell
00:08:22.200 yourself out of it back into normalcy because you can't understand how to use negativity as fuel.
00:08:28.920 Right now we live in a society that's very soft, that's very weak, that is very touchy feely. And
00:08:35.420 honestly, there's a massive opportunity for real fucking killers to go out and win. If they can
00:08:41.320 understand that they need to bank the negativity, bank the criticism, bank the doubt, and then draw
00:08:48.280 upon it as they need it. When they're tired, when they want to quit, when they don't feel like it. And
00:08:53.700 guess what? That's most of the time. Most of the time on this journey, you were going to feel like
00:09:00.720 shit. You were going to be overwhelmed. You were going to be stressed. You were going to be tired.
00:09:06.580 You were going to wonder if it's the right thing. That's most of the time. Everybody thinks this is
00:09:13.500 some sort of free and easy ride to the top because we have all these people on the internet who pretend
00:09:19.800 to do that so that they can dig down in your pocket and take your money. That's not reality. Reality is
00:09:26.400 it's fucking hard. Reality is it's going to take everything you got. Reality is if you don't have
00:09:31.860 a big old chip on your shoulder that you could draw from and then have it push you down the road,
00:09:36.760 you're not going to fucking make it. So when you look around and you start feeling bad because these
00:09:41.960 people are criticizing you, because these people are attacking you, because these people are doubting
00:09:46.760 you, I challenge you to flip the perspective to one where you're thankful for that because
00:09:53.400 eventually you'll become so successful, you won't have people doubting you anymore. You won't have
00:09:59.220 people criticizing you like that. You won't have people that don't believe and you won't have that
00:10:05.620 fuel and you wish you did. So learn how to use it, stay on the path and recognize that no matter what
00:10:14.040 someone says, no matter who it is that says it, the only way that you can lose on this journey is by
00:10:21.240 giving up. And I know that sounds cliche and I know that sounds oversimplified, but it is simple.
00:10:27.620 There are no failures. There's only quitting. Every single failure, every single hardship,
00:10:34.320 every single obstacle is going to serve you if you allow yourself to let it serve you.
00:10:41.120 Okay? So fuck what these people think. Fuck what they say. Fuck their doubts and their criticism
00:10:47.580 of their bullshit and their loser mentality. Put it all up here on your shoulder. And when you don't
00:10:52.760 feel like it and when you're frustrated and when you want to quit, take the proper amount out. And
00:10:58.260 the proper amount is the amount that gets you off your ass and gets you executing. Because if you're
00:11:03.940 executing day in and day out, day in and day out, day in and day out over the course of time,
00:11:10.160 regardless of what anybody says, regardless of what your mom says, regardless of what your dad says,
00:11:15.100 regardless of what your cousins say, regardless of what the internet says, if you are executing day
00:11:21.140 in and day out, no matter what, there is not a single fucking thing that can stop you. And keep
00:11:29.100 that in mind because every single person that you look up to, every single success story that inspires
00:11:35.420 you, every single championship story that you say, damn, dude, one day that's going to be me.
00:11:40.480 They all went through this. Every fucking single one of them. So don't think it's just you. Don't
00:11:46.400 take it personal, but use it as fuel. Because if you can execute, you cannot be fucking stopped.
00:11:54.520 And let me remind you of one little thing before we let you go. If you quit and you do retire back
00:12:02.880 into the framework of normalcy, you know what they're going to say 10 years from now about you?
00:12:08.080 They're going to say, yeah, he tried, but he fucking failed just like I knew he would.
00:12:14.280 So you could decide, do you want to go down the path and face the criticism and face the hate and
00:12:21.500 face the frustration and face the pain and use it as fuel and then go on to fucking win and inspire
00:12:28.040 and teach and lift people up? Or do you want to retire into the framework of normalcy?
00:12:34.520 Do you want to become like the people who are criticizing you? And then do you want to listen
00:12:39.900 to them 10 years from now? Talk about how you almost made it because I can't think of anything
00:12:45.620 worse than that.