REAL AF with Andy Frisella - November 27, 2023


603. Q&AF： Supporting Small Pro-American Businesses, Business Partnership Responsibilities & Having Hard Conversations


Episode Stats


Length

37 minutes

Words per minute

206.2155

Word count

7,695

Sentence count

3

Harmful content

Misogyny

1

sentences flagged

Hate speech

61

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of the show, we talk about the end of the year and how to get back into the swing of things after the holidays. We also talk about what to do if you want to lose weight in the last 30 days before the holidays and what to look out for in the new year.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 what is up guys it's andy for selling this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies
00:00:20.920 the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today we
00:00:25.360 have q and af that's where you submit the questions and we give you the afs now you can submit your
00:00:30.660 questions which can be about anything a few different ways the first way is guys email those
00:00:35.300 questions into ask andy at andy for seller.com or you can go on youtube and under the q and af episodes
00:00:41.600 which air every monday you can drop your question in the comments and we'll pick some from there as
00:00:45.360 well now other times you tune in we have different formats of the show shows within the show all right
00:00:51.120 we have cti that stands for cruise the internet that's where we talk about what's going on in the
00:00:54.860 world and uh we speculate on what's true and what's not true and then we talk about how we the people
00:00:59.380 have to solve these problems that these assholes create for us uh then we have real talk real talk 0.52
00:01:04.000 is just 5 to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk something i think you need to hear needs to be
00:01:08.660 heard then we have full length full length is uh typically what you see on every other podcast where
00:01:14.400 a guest comes in and we just have a conversation and then we have 75 hard verses 75 hard verses is
00:01:19.780 where we have somebody who has completed 75 hard and taken their life from a dumpster fire to
00:01:24.600 uh not a dumpster fire and then we talk about how they did it and how you can do it too if you're
00:01:30.320 unfamiliar with 75 hard it is the world's biggest mental recalibration program um you can learn about
00:01:37.900 it for free you can get it for free at episode 208 uh or you can buy the book the book is available on
00:01:43.440 my website andy for seller.com that's unnecessary to buy but if you like the nuts and bolts of the
00:01:48.780 program it'll explain it in depth and just so you know we do have a new book getting ready to launch
00:01:53.560 it's going to launch on january 1st 2024 so uh keep an eye out for that as well now for all the
00:02:00.420 information that we give out here which is valuable it's based on my 25 years soon to be 25 years about
00:02:07.140 another 30 days of uh entrepreneurship and business experience and uh what we like to do is we like to
00:02:13.960 ask very simply that you share the information if what you hear on the show makes you think makes you
00:02:19.180 laugh you find it valuable change your perspective it's something that helps you learn a real skill
00:02:23.700 which i promise you we will help you with that we just ask that you share the show okay because of
00:02:28.460 the nature of what we talk about on our cti episodes which is the things that are uncomfortable
00:02:32.240 to talk about we get shadow banned throttled and uh we really depend on you guys to get behind us
00:02:37.160 and share the show and share the message so uh when we say pay the fee that's what that means
00:02:41.780 um don't be a hoe share the show all right what's up what's going on man happy monday yeah man what's 0.98
00:02:48.980 going on oh you know getting back into it yeah yeah same thing yeah what's going on what's new with
00:02:55.620 you nothing man just uh i'm just ready to get get back into like i feel like this time of year is always
00:03:08.160 like frustrating because like half the people i deal with are like checked out you know what i
00:03:13.120 mean and there's nothing worse than when you're like a high drive ambitious go go go type person
00:03:19.220 and people check out like it's it's very frustrating so like i'm just ready you know to get through this
00:03:25.280 next 30 days or so and and get back into fucking business for most people yeah i mean i never slow 0.88
00:03:30.580 down dude it's been a hell of a year though man for a lot of people i think that that's the other
00:03:34.360 thing too it's like it's it's been an it's been a lot going on yeah you know it's going to get way
00:03:39.500 worse yeah well i mean on top of that too though i feel like it's also gone by super quick yeah you
00:03:44.840 know i'm saying like i feel like that too like it's already fucking november man yeah at the end 0.95
00:03:49.620 of november yeah you know i'm saying it's just been going by super super quick man and so i think
00:03:53.900 it's for some reason it's like the holiday times is always a time people start to slow down and
00:03:57.560 yeah try to ground themselves before they they laugh yeah the problem is bro for a lot of people
00:04:02.560 especially with their fitness is they just give up and they'll put on 10 15 pounds in 45 days
00:04:08.220 yeah and bro that 10 15 pounds gonna take you 60 days to get off you know what i mean like
00:04:13.240 it's just uh in a real way yeah you know if you do it the right way but uh you know a lot of people
00:04:19.780 during this time of year they create a bigger mountain that for them to climb and if i were
00:04:24.400 to recommend it i would say to avoid that yeah just try to maintain where you are right now
00:04:28.600 yeah or try to get better right now yeah you know everybody else is getting worse so if you can get
00:04:34.160 better it widens the gap yeah absolutely man absolutely um well to no one's surprise
00:04:40.580 got some good ones for you all right let's get it guys any question number one andy uh covet really
00:04:49.520 killed a lot of small businesses and shifted the wealth over to the big companies like walmart amazon
00:04:54.120 etc um now with a few small size businesses they're getting back to somewhat normal what do
00:05:00.460 you think would be the best way for us uh as americans to support small local pro-american
00:05:06.160 businesses in spite of the ultra convenient way the big box stores do business how do you compete with
00:05:12.180 that you just have to inconvenience yourself you have to understand that when you make an investment
00:05:17.680 in a real company owned by real americans that employs people in their community um these are
00:05:25.800 things that you're going to have to do if you want the economy to uh continue to provide jobs and
00:05:32.540 provide value and not be owned by three or four mega corporations uh and then by the way if they own
00:05:39.700 all if we have three or four mega corporations we have basically one culture being dictated to us which
00:05:45.480 is the woke culture that we all fucking hate okay so if you don't want them to be in control of
00:05:51.860 everything you have to understand that it's going to take some conscious effort to move outside the
00:05:57.300 realm of what is convenient to taking pride in doing things that are inconvenient to support
00:06:03.340 real american people not the you know the walmarts and the amazons of the world right um i'm going to
00:06:11.260 tell you this too this is real important for you guys to understand they're going to try to
00:06:15.280 close a bunch more businesses between now and election time okay so whatever they have planned
00:06:19.780 i've been talking to you guys on cti about this for for years now it's a pandemic or a war and
00:06:26.140 they're going to use whatever assets they have necessary it might be both to shut down business
00:06:31.180 again and use it as a way to scrape even more into their into their coffers and um you know you
00:06:38.020 guys have to be preemptively prepared for that and that means you're going to have to prepare your mind
00:06:42.360 that you are not going to give in you are not going to close your business you're not going to
00:06:46.340 comply with anything that they say and um that process should start now like you should start
00:06:52.220 realizing that over the next year probably a year to the day from now is probably going to be one of
00:06:58.900 the hardest times in america to own a business that has ever existed for multiple reasons now what
00:07:06.180 does that mean for you that means that you're going to have to get extra diligent and aggressive
00:07:10.960 about not just um staying in business but also evolving your business to be more successful a lot
00:07:18.780 of times when the economy shifts and things change and we go through hardships people shift into this
00:07:24.480 mindset of just staying open and just staying open will get you killed by default because just
00:07:31.280 staying open means that you're not trying to improve you're not trying to evolve you're not
00:07:35.320 trying to press forward and basically what it does is it puts you into a mental place where
00:07:40.320 your mentality goes from we're trying to become something we're trying to build something we're
00:07:47.760 trying to grow something to we're trying to maintain this thing and the law of business still applies
00:07:55.480 even during hard times which means there is no maintaining there is only moving forward and then
00:08:01.600 there is falling behind because the world is going to continue to move forward even through hard times
00:08:07.420 so we we as business operators have to understand that as hard as it is and as hard as it might get
00:08:14.240 it's going to be important to stay on your a-game to make sure you're doing a great job to not
00:08:19.280 lack your standards in any way and to continue to try to push forward and for the businesses that make it
00:08:24.720 through which will all of those businesses that make it through will operate the way i just said
00:08:28.340 when things get better again which they will they will be sprinting at a full pace where everybody
00:08:34.200 else is kind of picking up the pieces and try and it takes them two or three years to try and you know
00:08:39.320 get it going right um well those companies being two to three years yeah it gives you a two to three
00:08:43.860 year head start on everybody else because like so many companies will just go into this like
00:08:48.080 maintain shit you know what i mean um so there's that but i think the main thing is is like dude we 0.77
00:08:55.980 have to be real we have to inconvenience ourselves to shop with people intentionally it's not that
00:09:00.760 inconvenient it's not that inconvenient to you know to not order things on amazon and to actually just
00:09:07.060 order them from the company directly that's not that bad like order them from the company you know
00:09:11.920 it's not that inconvenient to you know go support small locally owned businesses or even medium-sized
00:09:18.220 locally owned businesses it's not that inconvenient to look at a company who may not be small and say
00:09:24.840 we're supporting like we get that here in st louis with first form and ask too right like st louis is
00:09:29.820 an amazing fucking town it like everybody's like why why do you live in st louis well you'll never get 0.91
00:09:34.780 it because you don't live here but i love the people here and i love this community i love this town
00:09:38.960 and they are they treat us very well and even though we've become bigger and bigger and bigger
00:09:43.440 and bigger they still understand that we're a small business and in the scheme of things
00:09:48.060 and that we're providing jobs and building careers in a pro-american way right right so we get massive
00:09:54.840 support and what happens is the community rallies behind us and we continue to do better and better
00:09:59.920 and better like one of the biggest driving factors of our companies is is our support that we get here
00:10:04.520 locally you know and we don't talk about it enough but that's the truth you know if you walk through
00:10:08.540 st louis bro there's a good chance people are wearing first form shit drinking a first form
00:10:12.880 energy or at least shopping at our retail stores and they're proud of it it's not it's not like oh
00:10:19.360 yeah these local guys they're like no fucking first form is fucking st louis right and like there's a 0.96
00:10:25.020 pride there and um for those of you guys that own businesses i would lean into that with your
00:10:30.740 communities you know get involved with your communities get involved with with the people in
00:10:34.960 your town become a place that they're proud to patronize and proud to support because and you
00:10:40.880 do that by treating them extra well right um and then reinvesting in the community over the course
00:10:45.880 of time but dude entrepreneur small business entrepreneurs are under attack and we're going
00:10:51.660 to have our hands full this next 12 months it's going to be very important that you guys don't comply
00:10:55.560 with any of the shit that's going on and to make sure that you keep moving forward and not get in 0.74
00:10:59.660 this rut of maintaining yeah i love it man absolutely uh guys question number two andy uh
00:11:05.640 andy i'm in high school and i have recently started a christmas light installation business with one of
00:11:11.060 my closest friends we both put money into the advertising and equipment but i feel like i invest
00:11:16.860 way more than he does in the business um i was the one who came up with the idea to start the business
00:11:22.220 we use my truck and trailer my ladders i make all of our ads made our logo etc all he has done
00:11:28.440 is invest his money he also would rather go out and party instead of working on the business on
00:11:33.500 the weekends when i brought up the topic of ownership of the company he thinks this is 50 50
00:11:39.060 should i just bluntly tell him that we can't work like this together or should i try to
00:11:44.340 paint a picture of how i see it and try to amend the situation what advice do you have for me
00:11:49.340 well first of all you should never get into a business without clear expectations and
00:11:55.360 understanding of what's what to start this is how you get in messes like this yeah a lot of
00:12:00.720 young entrepreneurs will get in these mentalities and by the way i'm the same you know chris is my
00:12:06.640 best friend so that's how we started the business um where they want to build a business they want to
00:12:12.520 do it with their friends which is a noble thought must say it sounds good it does sound good and it can
00:12:16.800 be good but it can only be good when both partners are bringing different things to the table
00:12:22.520 all right and the reality of this situation is he brought something to the table that you didn't
00:12:27.620 have which was capital and that's a normal business relationship over the course of time as your
00:12:32.940 business grows there's going to be situations where you borrow money from the bank or you you get an
00:12:39.680 investment from a silent investor well that silent investor isn't required to come in and do the
00:12:45.580 operations he gave the money he gave you the money that was his part right okay so so that's to what it
00:12:51.900 sounds like to me is that's what his understanding the other guy's understanding of the deal is which
00:12:56.640 is a is a deal that's a very real thing there's a lot of people who invest they're called investors
00:13:02.040 that don't do shit with the operations of the business so what this sounds like to me is you came up
00:13:08.540 with a good idea you got your buddy in on it you wanted his money to come in on it but and he was okay
00:13:14.820 with that but now you want him to do all the shit with you too which dude if you guys agreed to that 0.82
00:13:19.740 up front that's one thing but it doesn't sound like you did so the best way to handle this is
00:13:24.360 to understand that you made some mistakes in your organization and launch of the business and then
00:13:30.240 have a conversation with them and say hey look man i know that uh you know you gave the money in it but
00:13:36.960 i'm doing all these things and this and that but like real talk if this is going to work i'm going to
00:13:41.120 need you to help out with some of this stuff not just give me your money and we're going to work
00:13:45.360 that out and if you can't do that then let's work out a deal where i can pay you back your money and
00:13:49.680 then i can go on my own way right and and there's no reason it's not a hostile talk it's not an
00:13:55.380 argument it's not uncomfortable um it's just the truth and i think the reason that most of these
00:14:01.260 things turn into bad things is because we anticipate them being bad before we have the
00:14:06.180 conversation instead of just looking at them for what they are this is a miscommunication that you
00:14:11.140 have between you and your business partner that needs to be rectified so it's not just hey man i
00:14:16.280 can't fucking do this anymore it's like hey bro look i know we agreed to this and i'm assuming that 0.92
00:14:21.040 you thought this was this was i must have miscommunicated because actually i need this
00:14:25.560 help too okay and so like if we're going to move forward and build this out to what it could be
00:14:29.900 i'm going to need you to do these things to help me do do what we're doing here and that and then if
00:14:34.900 he's not willing to do that you say okay that's cool then let's work out a deal where i can
00:14:39.300 pay you back the money and get out or i could bring in another investor that's willing to do
00:14:43.420 those things and we can make you haul on the backside and dude there's this kind of thing
00:14:47.800 happens in business all the time uh it's totally normal and i don't think you should hesitate to
00:14:53.040 have that conversation in fact it'll probably condition you for the millions of other hard
00:14:57.940 conversations you'll have over the course of business because the christmas light decoration
00:15:02.280 business probably it probably isn't going to be your business forever right so you're learning and
00:15:06.740 you're you're learning how to do a business um it's important for you to have those conversations
00:15:11.240 so uh that's that's what i would do and that's what it sounds like to me it sounds to me like
00:15:15.440 you know he just probably doesn't know that he's supposed to be doing these things um or you didn't
00:15:20.620 make it clear and there's some some things that need to be fixed up there you know the funny thing is
00:15:25.420 is that's sort of relevant to to how we got started in business too and i think this is a worthy
00:15:31.160 story for you guys to know you know when chris and i first started s2 you know chris chris pretty
00:15:40.100 much did all the work like he did he did all the back-end work he didn't know much about products
00:15:45.460 and didn't know much about sales so i did that part chris did all the back-end stuff and real talk
00:15:53.420 there was a time for a long time many many years where he did way more than i did okay but then when
00:15:59.660 the when the business grew i was able to discover what i was gifted at which is branding and vision
00:16:06.960 and i became a massive asset to him yeah so what assets does this guy have that you're discounting
00:16:14.000 because he's not doing it now that could serve you later that's something to look at as well
00:16:18.380 because everybody knows me as the quote-unquote business guy out of the whole organization but the
00:16:24.460 reality is is you know for the first five or six years that motherfucker did all the work i didn't 0.91
00:16:28.780 do shit i talked to customers you know what i mean i went door to door i passed out flyers i talked 0.88
00:16:33.700 to people because that's what i could do but once we got to a point where we were expanding i was able
00:16:38.660 to bring immense value because of my knowledge of those things yeah does that make sense absolutely
00:16:43.540 so there's when you're in a business partner relationship there's times during the course
00:16:49.480 of the business where each partner is going to have more value than the other partner does that
00:16:54.760 make sense it's not always yeah it's not always like you're this one guy is the guy sometimes
00:16:59.740 you're going to go through phases where the where your friend maybe he saves the business because
00:17:05.160 he's got some skills that you don't even know he has yet there's all kinds of things to think about
00:17:09.640 and very few times like like when i come in here at first form a lot of people think oh andy's doing
00:17:15.560 this but the reality is i got jason i got sal i got fucking an amazing team of executives and 0.94
00:17:20.800 those guys are highly skilled people like they're carrying the weight you know what i'm saying so
00:17:25.980 we have to be real about how this works now i've realized that you're just getting started and this
00:17:32.040 is probably a heavy answer for but but there's a lot to it and you should be thinking what's what
00:17:37.240 would this be like like how would you address this conversation if you were five years down the
00:17:44.000 road and you were doing 20 million dollars in sales how would you address it right think about it
00:17:48.360 like that right you know what i'm saying so there's ways to think about these things but
00:17:52.780 ultimately guys the truth is is that we have to get very comfortable having uh good communication
00:17:58.000 with our business partners and i don't like to say like a lot of people will say well i got to have
00:18:02.660 a hard conversation it's not a hard conversation it's just a conversation man you're building that
00:18:07.060 up yes yes like stop saying i got to have a hard conversation stop saying that about your girlfriend
00:18:13.180 or your boyfriend or your husband or your wife or your business partner and just sort of say i got
00:18:18.200 to have a conversation because it takes a lot of the weight and the pressure off of that and it just
00:18:22.880 makes it what it is which is we're not communicating and we got to get on the same page and that's that's
00:18:27.740 as simple as you can make it the simpler you can make it the less pressure you have to carry
00:18:32.760 which makes it easier to get to an actual resolution and then the last thing i'll add to this
00:18:37.760 is that when you have these conversations you should be understanding that the the idea is not
00:18:43.600 to win the conversation it's not to i'm not trying to get my way i'm trying to get the best way the way
00:18:50.300 the way okay and a lot of people especially when they're young they want to win the conversation
00:18:55.680 the idea of winning the conversation is is a faulty idea conversations are not things to have won
00:19:03.780 there are things to have to find a resolution that serves the the purpose of what we're working to do
00:19:09.580 and that comes with humility and the removal of ego which is hard to do when you're young real talk
00:19:16.960 yeah so like now when i have to have conversations with let's say jason and sal or chris or you know
00:19:23.960 one of the guys here or anybody or fucking ed who i'm partners with in arte or whatever whatever i got 0.96
00:19:29.540 going on it's it's the the the context of the conversation is not we got to do it my way the
00:19:38.080 context of the conversation is hey what's the best way so that we can make this work and win yeah and
00:19:44.680 that's that's where a lot of business owners and leaders really fuck up dude they fuck up their whole
00:19:49.440 lives it's not about winning bro it's about finding the best path forward if you want to be a great
00:19:54.740 leader your leadership style should be i'm going to listen to you i'm going to listen to you i'm going to
00:19:59.240 listen to you two guys and then i'm going to figure out what i think the best answer is even if it's
00:20:04.260 not mine you see what i'm saying yeah it may not be yours it's probably not going to be yeah like the
00:20:10.020 you know what i mean sometimes it will be but you know the the goal of what we're trying to do here is
00:20:16.020 to win so the outcome of the conversation should be what's the best for everybody here not just because
00:20:23.820 i love this or this is me or i did this or i put this money in or i did all the work dude fuck all 0.99
00:20:30.180 that sometimes you're going to do more work than your business partner sometimes he's going to do
00:20:34.240 more work than you that's an ebb and flow that naturally happens so my advice ultimately here is to
00:20:40.540 have a conversation get on the same page address the conversation with the context of we're trying
00:20:47.040 to find the best solution possible and then move forward from there yeah i love that i think this
00:20:52.060 is awesome dude like i like seeing these these questions and stories we're seeing a lot more
00:20:56.220 younger people coming in at like starting businesses i think it's fucking great wait dude listen this is 0.83
00:21:01.920 hard shit like what i just explained like yeah i can rip it off and it sounds real easy but remember 0.89
00:21:08.320 i was a young dumb entrepreneur that in 19 years old didn't know shit okay so i've done this and made 0.80
00:21:15.700 all these mistakes so many fucking times bro it's insane this is experience bro this is not this is 0.99
00:21:21.720 not you're not supposed you're not supposed to just know this shit yeah you know what i mean it's 0.76
00:21:25.440 learners yes yes i love that man one uh one thing i want to follow up on this question though when
00:21:30.620 you talk about conflict resolution right with your partners or your even execs have you found it to be
00:21:36.900 difficult when you know let's say you're a passionate person right and then you know your whole team
00:21:41.820 they're also passionate people right like how how have you handled those conversations when it's like
00:21:46.780 you know it's not necessarily okay my decision is the best but you truly believe that you have the
00:21:51.220 best goal and somebody else does as well and you guys are equally passionate on that how do you have
00:21:55.560 those those conversations well i'm overpowering you have to know yourself first okay so i have this
00:22:02.880 and you guys all know that all the guys here in this room i'm talking to you i have an overpowering
00:22:08.140 passion i i haven't i can walk into a room and there can be 10 other passionate people in three
00:22:13.520 seconds they'll shut the fuck up okay real talk but that's not good that's a that's a hindrance to 0.85
00:22:20.240 me because what ends up happening is the rest of the guys shut up and i don't hear their good ideas
00:22:25.200 okay so we have to understand that sometimes you shutting the fuck up is what produces the best result
00:22:32.400 so how do i address that it's hard okay because i am passionate but i have to sometimes remember like
00:22:39.120 all right look just shut up and let them talk let them say their shit let everybody go and then you 0.83
00:22:45.020 go at the end and so like that's something that that has helped me but dude real talk i'm not great
00:22:51.060 at it all the time like sometimes sometimes i do know the answer but all right this is a weakness of
00:22:57.500 my leadership no this is this is a weakness of my own leadership i'll just be real
00:23:02.400 sometimes i know the answer like i already know and and i'm urgent because i want to win now
00:23:08.680 okay so i already know the answer i don't want to fucking hear it from 10 other people i already 0.95
00:23:14.020 fucking know right okay so i'll walk in and be like this is what the fuck we're doing 0.86
00:23:17.780 all right however you can make a lot of mistakes doing it that way because maybe madad has a couple
00:23:25.860 ideas that make it even better than that right so it's very it's that's my weakness as a leader my
00:23:32.060 weakness is not not being assertive it's being too assertive and um so there's this really good book
00:23:38.880 uh called the five dysfunctions of a team that i read i don't know 12 15 years ago and it kind of
00:23:46.740 goes through this process of how you get people to contribute and be valued on your team and uh i read
00:23:53.180 that book and it changed my perspective but i still struggle with it so what i try to do man is i try to be
00:23:57.560 the last to talk like when we're in a meeting if like i know the answer or i all right if i don't
00:24:03.620 know the answer i fucking you guys have to talk right but sometimes like i get too aggressive and 0.99
00:24:08.220 too ambitious and too passionate and i want to go in and be like all right we're just doing this
00:24:12.420 for the sake of getting it done quickly right i like to move now i don't like to move like i want
00:24:17.980 to i want to i want to be there now and that's unrealistic so sometimes that gets the best of me as a
00:24:24.560 leader but you know the truth of the matter is is being aware of your own shortcomings is how you
00:24:29.060 become great at it yeah and um so i have to be very conscious of that yeah you know i mean for sure
00:24:34.640 i mean like i because i remember a time when i when i first got with you you know i would ask you a
00:24:38.440 question like man why you guys aren't doing this way ignorantly not understand like well fuck i'm sure 0.93
00:24:44.660 you guys have thought about this idea 15 fucking years ago well and that's that's part of the problem 0.95
00:24:49.240 bro i know it's got to be difficult to have to do so so like dude so one of the frustrations with
00:24:54.280 having a lot of business experience like you guys probably hear this like when you see me do live
00:24:59.220 q a or if you're at rta sometimes i'll get fucking annoyed at the question that's like yeah because 0.93
00:25:04.660 i'm like are you fucking serious dude because i forget that you don't know yeah you know what i mean 0.98
00:25:09.620 and i've gone through this so many times that it's it's like air to me like it's just the way it is
00:25:15.680 and the more experience you get the more it's like that but also the more you get like that
00:25:22.820 the less involvement you can make because you're not allowing for any other opinions or insights
00:25:27.960 so you have to be very aware that like just because it's gone this way 20 times
00:25:32.240 maybe this is the 21st time it's gonna go a little different so we have to leave room there for the
00:25:37.440 for the outside uh perspectives to allow you to make the proper decision does that make sense
00:25:42.820 absolutely man yeah absolutely guys andy question number three andy this actually flows perfectly
00:25:49.440 man andy i suck at having hard conversations um growing up whenever hard conversations would come
00:25:56.280 up family would either uh call it complaining or respond with that victim mentality even throwing
00:26:01.100 bible verses into the conversation now whenever these conversations are needed i feel like i'm
00:26:05.820 complaining or being somewhat selfish i have a five-year-old son who is very observant and out of
00:26:10.840 many things i want to install in him that this is one of the things i'm not sure how to how to have
00:26:15.880 those conversations how did your dad teach you to have these hard conversations what i what i just said
00:26:22.580 they're not hard conversations they're unemotional just conversations you know about finding resolution
00:26:27.660 it's all about the perspective bro it's about it's about looking at things like well first of all
00:26:34.140 you have to understand if you aren't willing to communicate you're not going to get shit okay
00:26:40.600 you're going to get paid bullshit you're going to have a shitty job you're never going to get ahead
00:26:45.280 you're going to get bitter you're going to look around be like everybody's passing me by
00:26:49.160 no they're not passing you by you're not learning a very real skill set that you must have to be
00:26:55.660 successful which is to communicate so if you can't communicate you have less value this is a real
00:27:01.560 thing and so when you look at your little five-year-old son you say i want to set a good
00:27:05.560 example for him right now you are not setting a good example for him i'll tell you that right now
00:27:10.300 he is learning right now to be passive to be weak to go with the flow and what will end up happening
00:27:16.440 is that kid will grow up witnessing his dad be this way and then he will be that way and he's going to
00:27:22.320 get the same shit you're getting which is probably not much right now okay so learning how to 0.72
00:27:27.360 communicate effectively is the most important skill that you have to have for a prosperous life
00:27:34.460 prosperous with your relationships your friendships your job anything that you do it's a requirement to
00:27:43.440 be able to communicate effectively if you have some sort of reservation or some sort of mental block
00:27:49.300 you have to figure out how to get over that now how do you get over the fear of having conversations
00:27:54.800 if i had to give you a million dollars to answer this right now what would you say you have to do
00:28:00.360 to get over the fear of having conversations dj what we have to do have a conversation there you go
00:28:08.020 million bucks i got it yeah not really though not really though but i'm just saying yeah all right
00:28:14.300 all right but here's what i'm saying dude like this is this there's only one way to move past the
00:28:20.840 things that you suck at like when i first started playing baseball bro my first year of baseball i 0.65
00:28:26.200 didn't get a single hit a single hit the whole entire year okay the next year i figured it out and
00:28:33.180 i started dropping motherfucking bombs okay like this is how it works still falling work yeah they 0.79
00:28:40.040 even come back listen i hit those motherfuckers in 82 they went over the mountain yeah i'm with you 0.88
00:28:44.840 all right like dude look we this anything that we want to get better at comes down to us doing the
00:28:54.040 thing that we are afraid to do because we suck at it all right and right now brother you suck at 0.93
00:28:59.580 having conversations you just listed off 15 objections as to why you don't have it oh they
00:29:05.660 threw bible verses at me man fuck that like do you want do you want to lose if you want to lose 0.99
00:29:12.240 keep being a fucking pussy about having conversations you will not make any money you will be pissed off 1.00
00:29:18.180 you won't have any good relationships because you can't communicate you won't have any real
00:29:22.560 friendships because you can't communicate and your life's gonna fucking suck and lots of people live 0.96
00:29:27.500 their whole lives like this because they're afraid of saying things that are very obviously things that
00:29:33.800 they should communicate it should be said yes and so we have to remove this fear from our minds and our
00:29:40.980 hearts that having a conversation is a hard thing it is not hard it's very simple you move your mouth
00:29:48.000 sounds come out like it's real simple dude if you break it down to how simple it is there's nothing to
00:29:53.800 be afraid of their reaction to what you say that is their responsibility now they might get upset
00:30:00.700 they might get upset they might throw a tantrum they might you know fucking get angry but the reality 0.87
00:30:07.220 is dude it's not going to matter because even if that relationship crumbles you're going to have
00:30:11.420 the skill of communication that's going to allow you to build amazing relationships with other people
00:30:15.400 and other careers or other relationships that's going to benefit you so stop thinking of this as
00:30:22.740 like dude this person whoever wrote this that you're by you saying well i had this happen to me and
00:30:30.160 i had that happen to me and i had this happen to me and i had that happen to me bro that is victim
00:30:34.580 mentality like whoever told you that in your family they're fucking right like you're being 0.96
00:30:39.080 a victim i got yelled at one time when i tried to say something i got told i was stupid i bro that 0.75
00:30:47.080 happens to everybody that's not exclusive to you you know how many times i got told i was a fucking 0.89
00:30:52.060 do you know how many times i get told i'm a fucking moron today like do you guys read the comments on 0.92
00:30:57.060 some of these videos on the internet like if i actually listen to them like i would what would i do i
00:31:01.680 go home and fucking cry every day like fuck those people i don't give a shit man i'm gonna say what 0.99
00:31:06.100 the fuck i gotta say and however you react to it is okay with me that's dude that's a place of freedom 0.68
00:31:11.420 that you want to get to okay because when you're afraid to say things when you're afraid to speak
00:31:17.340 the truth or you're afraid to communicate you are living in an environment that owns you okay if you
00:31:24.200 want to feel free and you want to feel light and you want to feel good you have to develop the the
00:31:29.000 one the skill of communication but also two the courage to say the way things are even when it's
00:31:34.340 uncomfortable and if you can if you can do those two things like you and i do on the on the cti
00:31:39.000 episodes every fucking day bro i walk around light as fuck a lot of people are like they're like how do 0.97
00:31:44.860 you do all that like how do you bro that would that's got to be hard i'm like it's real easy man
00:31:48.680 i move my mouth the shit comes out and however they react is the way it is and like what are they 0.83
00:31:53.580 gonna do well you're gonna call my business and complain get me fucking fired well i'm not firing 0.99
00:31:58.800 me you know what i'm saying like like it's not happening i got you yeah right so like dude i'm
00:32:04.660 i feel good about that like what the dude real talk it'll become the thing you're most proud of in your
00:32:09.920 life like you know what i'm most proud of i'm most proud of is that i could say whatever the fuck i 0.65
00:32:15.640 want and nobody can ever say that i'm being told what to say or someone's influencing me or like
00:32:21.560 my sponsors are telling me not to say i don't even take sponsors because i don't want to listen
00:32:25.600 to these fucking idiots tell me what to say or not to say yeah you know what i'm saying there's a 0.99
00:32:29.660 tremendous amount of like confidence and freedom and your your shoulders back and your head hell
00:32:34.740 high like when i walk in a room bro this is real shit when i walk in a room with all the other people 0.85
00:32:40.440 out here who are famous right i know i'm the baddest motherfucker because they're all too pussy 1.00
00:32:46.320 to speak the truth it is what it is there's very few exceptions yeah very few no that's right okay
00:32:52.860 so it is what it is it it builds you up tell the truth speak the truth learn how to communicate
00:32:59.440 you'll build an amazing life with an amazing income with an amazing partner you'll have amazing kids
00:33:04.420 and i think most of the success in life comes down to us getting over this idea bro you ever heard that
00:33:10.100 saying uh that the squeaky wheel gets the grease like there's truth to that like the person who
00:33:17.360 speaks up gets the reward you're never going to be wealthy if you can't learn to fucking speak up 0.88
00:33:21.320 people always think of that as like a negative thing that that uh that quote there bro the world
00:33:25.980 doesn't reward meekness it doesn't reward humility the reason that that those values are overvalued
00:33:32.020 in society is for two reasons one the people who run society want us to be poor little me's they
00:33:38.060 don't want us to say shit they want us to accept scraps they want us to be dependent on them and 0.84
00:33:43.160 two it's much easier to live that kind of life than it is to have the courage to actually speak up and
00:33:48.640 communicate and stand up for yourself so because we are in a situation of comfort and convenience
00:33:54.680 we act like there's no real problem and because we act like there's no real problem that real problem
00:33:59.960 gets fucking massive and out of control and ends up ruining our lives so look man 0.89
00:34:04.940 learn to communicate if you can learn to communicate and you can remove this idea that it's hard or
00:34:13.020 that it's bad or that people are going to be upset or this person is going to be upset with me
00:34:16.660 bro it brings a tremendous amount of success and freedom to your life and it's something that's
00:34:21.740 required to be the kind of person you're trying to be that's reality it's funny because like all
00:34:26.600 the conversations that i've had that i thought were going to be these hard difficult ones they were
00:34:31.380 actually the easiest ones but then the ones that i thought would be nice and easy bro it turned into
00:34:35.780 a fucking fist fight you know well look dude you're dealing with check it out your head yeah it is what 0.93
00:34:40.200 it is man and i mean i don't uh i don't know like this is something this is an issue that i very rarely
00:34:48.920 think about anymore and i forget that i wasn't always like that like i wasn't always like how i am now
00:34:54.820 there was i spent a lot of time like this man or this woman whoever wrote that question i spent a lot
00:34:59.800 of time like that person where i was afraid to communicate and i was afraid to say what i thought
00:35:04.400 and i was afraid to speak up and you know what happened to me when that happened i didn't make
00:35:08.980 any money i didn't get any of the opportunities i didn't have any good friends and i fucking was 0.97
00:35:13.880 pissed off at everybody in the world because i'm like fuck dude i have all this shit to offer 0.99
00:35:17.140 and you don't see it well they're not seeing it because you're not allowing them to see it
00:35:20.700 so we cannot live in this bro and honestly this works itself into what's going on in the world today
00:35:27.820 okay the reason a lot of you guys won't speak up and stand up is for the same reasons we're talking
00:35:32.460 about now you're afraid of what might happen you're afraid of what could happen you're afraid of what
00:35:37.960 so and so will think and then you live your the rest of your life dealing with the the results of that
00:35:43.620 having frustration when in reality dude it's just a little bit of courage like look at the look at
00:35:49.560 the the way society has been for the last however many years the last 10 years at least where so
00:35:58.900 many people disagree with the way society is going but it continues to go that way why because nobody's
00:36:05.420 talking about okay why aren't they talking about it because the other team has figured out that if
00:36:11.620 they shame them and they make them feel stupid and they insult them and they bully them that that per 0.97
00:36:17.400 that person will remain silent but those people that remain silent lose they lose there's no
00:36:23.820 nobility in the silent majority there's no nobility in you know political correctness there's the
00:36:30.620 fucking truth and then there's shit that isn't true like a man is a woman and a woman is a man 0.93
00:36:35.080 okay just because you understand biology doesn't mean you're a fucking bigot all right the truth is the
00:36:41.080 truth is the motherfucking truth and it's always going to be that way and until you understand that not
00:36:46.080 only should you learn to communicate in your personal lives where it's going to affect you the most
00:36:50.080 and you also need to communicate what's going on in society shit's going to continue to get worse
00:36:56.280 and that's reality i love it man guys andy that was three that's three go pay the fee
00:37:03.420 yeah went from sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a pole fuck a stove counted millions 0.99
00:37:10.460 in the cold bad bitch booted swole got her on bankroll can't fold doesn't know headshot case close 1.00
00:37:17.920 close
00:37:18.420 you