REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 72. The Power Of Indifference

00:00:00.000 i told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living 1.00

00:00:04.680 spoke it till existence mo changed to 50 got mo cost than did i only weigh 180 but my watch 0.99

00:00:11.720 cost 250 what's up guys it's andy priscilla and this is the show for the realists say goodbye 0.98

00:00:17.160 to the lies the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality

00:00:22.540 guys today got a real short episode for you before i get into it i'd like to remind you 0.69

00:00:27.460 that we don't run ads on this show uh we grow this show completely off of you guys meaning if we add 0.83

00:00:34.840 value and you guys share it the show grows if our show fucking sucks and you don't share it our show 0.96

00:00:41.260 doesn't grow and i'm perfectly okay operating that way uh because i try to pour everything i can into 0.95

00:00:49.980 this show for you guys and hopefully um it'll give you a different perspective to keep you entertained

00:00:54.440 uh it'll teach you a lot of things uh and hopefully you know you pull some things away from it and all

00:01:01.160 we ask is that if you do uh pay the fee the fee is not monetary the fee is just talking to people

00:01:08.080 about the show and have them give a listen whenever you get around you know people who you think might

00:01:12.600 benefit from this show so with that being said guys uh you guys do an amazing job of that and i just want

00:01:18.860 to say thank you so much for that because i think as far as i know we're one of the only shows that's

00:01:23.700 consistently top 10 um that doesn't run ads and uh i think that says something so something i'm really

00:01:32.160 proud of but anyway guys you know this situation we have in society right now is very turbulent i think

00:01:40.900 everybody knows that right like it's very hard to look anywhere um you know on social media especially

00:01:49.140 on mainstream media uh you know we can't even watch the nfl we can't watch the nba we can't watch

00:01:55.400 anything without seeing things um that are political and and usually upsetting in some way shape or form

00:02:03.680 uh to us and you know that's okay we we all have different views uh we all see things different ways

00:02:10.660 but it's kind of hard to avoid the energy right like it's hard to avoid um you know we see

00:02:18.220 so and so said this and we don't agree with it and we're like fuck so and so right uh or we see 0.91

00:02:25.120 somebody that you know we they say what we what we like and they confirm our biases and our information 0.86

00:02:31.860 and what we believe and we're like oh yeah that's my dude right like we're so into this now uh socially

00:02:39.000 i think it's a very dangerous place to be for us as people um and the reason that it's very dangerous

00:02:45.240 you know there's a lot of reasons on the macro level right we get into group think we get into

00:02:50.460 situations where you know we don't necessarily uh you know make the right decisions because we're all

00:02:59.000 wrapped up in what you know everybody else is doing things like that it makes it hard for us to

00:03:04.580 make decisions and to be productive especially and you know this show is about winning dude this show is

00:03:11.680 about the reality of how to fucking win all right that's what it's always going to be about now we 0.90

00:03:16.220 might talk some funny shit we might tell some jokes we might talk about the problems in the world but 0.97

00:03:21.340 we're never going to talk about the problems without a solution that's something that you will always get 0.97

00:03:26.740 here we're not a you know we're not a passive show i guess so to speak where it's like hey you know

00:03:32.760 these are the problems and what do you guys think look dude i'm going to give you my opinion

00:03:36.200 that's what we do here uh but today i wanted to let you guys in on something that i think could

00:03:44.300 really help everybody in terms of how to operate in a in a scenario where we are constantly agitated

00:03:54.500 we are constantly seeing things that don't go well with what we like or we're constantly seeing things

00:04:01.800 that upset us and no matter what side of the political or socio-economic spectrum that you find

00:04:08.360 yourself on hopefully uh you don't affiliate with either one and you think for yourself but we always

00:04:17.080 find ourselves where you know we think and i think that's a natural thing i'm not judging anybody for

00:04:22.960 that i work very hard to try and have my own thoughts but we're all influenced and so the problem with

00:04:30.500 that becomes that when we see information or hear information that may be in conflict with what it

00:04:38.900 is we think or believe or have an opinion you know we've been conditioned over the last 15 years to

00:04:45.780 just jump all over people when they don't do what we want them to do and that's very dangerous because

00:04:53.680 now we have a situation where we can't communicate we can't connect with people uh you're either on the

00:04:58.940 team or you're off the team you know it's not human dude what's human is hey you've got an opinion

00:05:04.500 why do you have that opinion oh well i've got a different opinion this is why i have it and then

00:05:08.680 we can talk and then guess what we can give a high five we can drink a beer we can still be cool

00:05:13.420 and we've lost that as society and i think that we lost that i think facebook is a big contributor to

00:05:20.960 why we lost that whenever they went to a situation where um you know technology has consistently

00:05:28.580 shortened our communication process i've talked about this a number of times on this show and then

00:05:34.160 other shows as well you know back in the day you know i'm talking 100 years ago what do we have you

00:05:41.640 know 250 years ago we had to see people in person or maybe we could send a letter right so there was

00:05:46.680 very clear communication going on then we had the telephone still very clear communication

00:05:51.820 then we got um you know the fax machine a little shorter then we got email a little shorter and then 0.96

00:05:58.280 we got social media and you know people go on and leave a 100 what is it 240 character fucking response 0.96

00:06:05.780 on twitter i don't do twitter so i'm just guessing that could whatever the fuck it is but right we only 0.86

00:06:10.660 have enough space to say one thing but then we got to a point where you know let's just say on facebook

00:06:17.380 you say something and then they made it so you could like the comment right and when they made it so you

00:06:24.080 could like the comment people went from having actual conversations to trying to win the conversation

00:06:29.960 and what we have right now going on is a 10-year indoctrination by social media to say witty clever

00:06:37.900 things that get us celebrated instead of having productive conversations now that really doesn't

00:06:44.160 have a lot to do with what i'm going to teach you today but i want you to know why we are where we are

00:06:50.040 so that you could clearly identify how to avoid what i'm about to talk about and what i'm going to talk

00:06:55.580 about is this you don't have to have an opinion okay lots of people feel like they have to have an

00:07:03.620 opinion on every single thing that goes on they've got to be in uh you know the voice on every single

00:07:09.620 little thing and guys what i want you to think about is there's a lot of power in indifference

00:07:15.860 there's a lot of power in not caring there's a lot of power in apathy about certain things and so

00:07:22.200 you have to know when to have an opinion and when not to have an opinion and it's not that you have to

00:07:30.300 have an opinion or not have an opinion but it's for your own mental health and this is where i'm

00:07:34.680 going with this okay we are constantly agitated we are constantly poked at we are constantly

00:07:40.240 challenged by everything that we see in the world and it's causing this mass disruption where we can't

00:07:47.640 even have a conversation with people who might slightly think differently than what we think i think

00:07:52.720 that's very bad but the main reason it's bad for you and the reason it's bad for me is that whenever

00:07:57.740 we try to have an opinion on every single thing what we end up doing is needlessly agitating

00:08:06.240 ourselves and taking our attention away from things that could be productive for us all right so while 0.97

00:08:13.780 there's a shitload of power ultimate power in giving a fuck there is also a lot of power in indifference 0.82

00:08:20.800 all right and so when you and the example i want to use with you guys is very simple all right 0.98

00:08:28.300 i want you to think about for a second all the things that have been said about you

00:08:35.300 behind your back that you're completely unaware of okay think about that now a lot of you are probably 1.00

00:08:43.560 like well fuck i i don't know like do people talk about me fuck yeah they talk about you bro 0.99

00:08:49.620 they talk about you just like you talk about other people just like everybody talks about other people 0.99

00:08:54.320 you just ain't there to hear it that's the truth all right so think of all the things that people have

00:09:01.660 said about you behind your back that you were unaware of how upset did you get about those things

00:09:07.920 oh that's right you didn't get upset because you didn't know now on the other hand i want you to

00:09:15.860 think about that meaning one out of every 50 times someone says something about you and you end up

00:09:22.720 finding out about it i want to think about your reaction there what's your reaction then well usually

00:09:28.660 you get upset usually you spend half your day trying to figure out why they said it and the rest of the

00:09:34.420 half try the other half trying to defend it or trying to uh make peace with the person or trying to

00:09:40.760 fight that person it takes your energy away from things that would otherwise be productive for you 0.90

00:09:46.780 and so that's just by default right like by default the things we don't know about can't really fuck with 0.85

00:09:55.340 us but how do we not know about things when we know about them that's the power here that's the lesson

00:10:04.720 i want you to learn okay if you can learn the power of indifference if you can learn to cultivate

00:10:14.040 and create the ability to observe things without having an opinion or without having a reaction

00:10:21.880 without having an emotional outburst even if it's about you even if it stings you're creating power for

00:10:29.560 yourself because when you have power for yourself and you're protective of the power of yourself

00:10:35.940 instead of other people influencing you instead of other people taking your energy instead of other

00:10:42.580 people doing things that can get you off your game you have the ability to do nothing other than what it

00:10:52.080 is you were going to do anyway okay you start to act in a way whereas the thing that bothers you really

00:11:01.580 doesn't bother you and what does that do for you it frees up your energy it frees up all of your focus

00:11:09.300 it frees up your stress your anxiety all these things all of these things that are keeping you from

00:11:16.300 actually being productive now i believe that the power of being indifferent about opinions people

00:11:23.940 have about you is a very very very strong powerful skill to develop but also it's a very necessary skill

00:11:33.840 for you to develop how much time do you spend arguing with people who disagree with you on the internet

00:11:40.720 how much time do you spend arguing with your aunt or your uncle who doesn't believe in you how much

00:11:47.220 time do you spend arguing with your boyfriend or your girlfriend or trying to convince your boyfriend

00:11:53.740 or girlfriend that you're going to do this that or the other thing what if it just didn't matter what

00:11:58.520 they said what if you just let it go what if you had the ability to close it out and not let it

00:12:03.360 affect you in that negative way that we all respond to automatically now your energy is free

00:12:10.460 now you're able to move forward now you're able to stay focused and execute on the things

00:12:15.360 that you need to do and i'm not saying this is a easy skill to develop guys but what i am saying

00:12:23.240 is that if you develop it you become very powerful because most people will spend their entire lives

00:12:30.980 worrying so much what other people think that they actually don't even have the energy required 0.99

00:12:36.620 to put into their own lives because they're so busy counting the arrows that other motherfuckers 1.00

00:12:43.480 shot them in the back with okay it doesn't matter it doesn't matter who believes in you it doesn't 1.00

00:12:48.720 matter who uh doesn't like you it doesn't matter who's got this opinion of you it doesn't fucking 1.00

00:12:54.520 matter what matters is what you do do you spend all day being irritated every time someone says 0.66

00:13:00.900 something you don't like every time you see a political opinion you don't agree with

00:13:04.400 every time you see something that agitates you what do you do do you stop and get all fussy and

00:13:11.080 hussy and decide you're going to spend the next three hours getting a comment war with someone online 0.70

00:13:15.660 or do you say hey that that's their opinion and that's that and you go back to what you're doing 0.96

00:13:22.420 because i'm going to tell you right now one of those people is going to lose and the other one's 0.98

00:13:26.480 going to fucking win and if you're not smart enough to figure out which one it is it's going to win 0.97

00:13:30.620 then you probably shouldn't even be listening to this show all right we only have so much energy 0.99

00:13:36.600 we only have so much care we only have the ability to focus and have honest and meaningful opinions

00:13:45.560 about so many things so we have to know what to let go and what to care about and cultivating that

00:13:53.840 power and cultivating that discipline is a very hard process especially in the beginning of you know

00:14:01.220 trying to build a brand whether that's a personal brand whether it's a bit actual business brand or

00:14:05.480 whatever it is you're going to do things that are going to cause other people to have reactions

00:14:11.120 and how you respond to those reactions is ultimately what's going to dictate where you end up

00:14:19.180 all right so there's a lot of power and apathy there's a lot of power and indifference and

00:14:24.920 there's a fuck ton of power and staying focused even when other people are trying to derail you as 0.55

00:14:30.880 much as possible all right because that is going to happen the more successful you get the more people

00:14:36.920 are going to try to pull you off your game the more people aren't going to like the way you did

00:14:40.760 something the more people that you know they're going to disagree with how you handle this or that or the

00:14:45.500 other all right now there's definitely a line there like let's just say you know somebody says oh

00:14:53.900 this guy did this and this and this well did you do that and was it wrong and can you learn from it 0.99

00:15:01.060 can you correct the behavior or is it fucking bullshit is it someone's opinion that it's just like 0.99

00:15:07.360 not true because if it is why are you worried about it if it's not true then why are you worried 0.99

00:15:13.240 about it why are you letting it distract you from what it is that you need to do why are you letting

00:15:18.540 it take your energy away from the things that are going to benefit you that are going to benefit your

00:15:22.560 family they're going to benefit your future because what i see right now is a lot of people from all 0.83

00:15:29.080 walks of life getting really fucking agitated about things that really don't fucking matter to them 0.90

00:15:33.800 and i think that's been this whole year you have to learn the discipline of letting things go 0.97

00:15:41.920 you have to understand how to create a scenario where you could flip a switch in your brain

00:15:48.920 and the things that were aggravating you three seconds ago are now irrelevant and non-existent

00:15:55.580 to the path that you're on now i'm not saying ignore real issues that you have because a lot of people do 0.96

00:16:01.380 that right i'm talking about the shit that really just sucks your time i'm talking about the things 0.98

00:16:06.500 that don't really matter to you you know which way you're voting you know which your beliefs are 1.00

00:16:13.360 it's okay to listen to other people's beliefs we don't have to fucking hate people 0.69

00:16:16.800 but when people start attacking you and you find yourself getting irritated by the news by social

00:16:22.740 media by other people realize that's weakness when you let other people's decisions and words

00:16:29.060 take you off your game that's not them that's you

00:16:31.720 okay so learning how to not have an opinion learning how to be indifferent learning how 0.99

00:16:38.500 to put this into practice so that you don't spend your whole fucking life being bitter and being mad 0.94

00:16:45.520 and being you know the facebook warrior like everybody seems to be these days and instead 0.99

00:16:51.920 you've got your head down you're executing you're getting shit done your workouts are getting done 0.99

00:16:58.120 your business is getting done you don't find yourself losing time to all this irrelevant shit 0.99

00:17:03.580 that person who can cultivate that discipline is going to beat the fuck out of anybody else 0.94

00:17:10.480 a hundred times out of a hundred okay so this is not a little lesson for you guys this is a huge lesson

00:17:18.360 you don't have to care about everything and there's things you shouldn't care about

00:17:22.660 and a lot of the things that you do think you care about are really taking from your future 0.95

00:17:29.040 you just don't realize it yet and guys look man i get it dude i get it it fucking hurts 0.98

00:17:36.600 when people misunderstand you it hurts when people say things that irritate your core beliefs

00:17:43.000 it hurts when people say things about you that just aren't true but at the end of the day we've got

00:17:49.820 to think with logic and not emotion logic wins reality wins idealism does not win dreaming does

00:17:56.760 not win executing wins okay so you have to learn to push this stuff out it didn't even happen it's not

00:18:07.500 relevant just like all the other things that you never even knew about that people said that people

00:18:15.040 did behind your back because those things have happened and they haven't affected you

00:18:18.740 only a fool would act like that's not happening behind your back it's happening to all of you 1.00

00:18:24.240 all of you are the subject of gossip all of you are the subject of quote-unquote shit talk all of you 1.00

00:18:30.420 are the subject of criticism okay low-level people that's what they live on high-level people flush that 1.00

00:18:36.960 shit down the toilet and keep doing their motherfucking job all right power of the difference learn it use it 0.99

00:18:45.000 when with it 1.00

00:18:45.960 told my teacher dumb bitch i'm gonna get millions watch this in the project living down spoke it till 1.00

00:18:51.840 exist 1.00

00:18:52.240 i'm from where you can't trust 1.00

00:18:54.000 so welcome

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REAL AF with Andy Frisella - September 29, 2020

72. The Power Of Indifference

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