749. Q&AF: Is Hard Work A Skill?, Discipline Vs Focus & Setting Bigger Goals
Episode Stats
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199.72092
Summary
In this midweek get better session, the guys talk about a variety of topics. They discuss how to get better at being a better person, how to be a better human being, and what it means to be an asshole.
Transcript
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what is up guys it's andy for selling this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies the
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fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys
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today we got a little midweek get better session we got q and af that's where you submit the q's and
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we give you the a f's now you could submit your questions to be answered on the show a couple
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different ways the first way is guys email these questions into ask andy at andy for selling.com
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or you go on youtube in the comment section drop your question in there on the q and a f episodes
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we'll answer some from there as well guys uh we are going to start doing live call-ins so i'm going to
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let you guys know we've got that coming up um so the q and a's we're going to start having you guys
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call in live and uh that should be fun because i'm sure some of y'all want to be assholes guess what
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i could be asshole too so we're going to start doing that so uh i'll keep you in a loop on that
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we're setting up right now and uh don't forget we do have a fee for the show i'm not going to go
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through the whole intro um the fee is very simple we don't run ads on the show i don't waste half of
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your time listening to ads i don't want to answer these people i don't want to talk about things i
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don't use just for money that's not what i'm about finance the show on myself so i ask very simply
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that you share the show if it makes you think if it makes you laugh it gives you some good
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information good perspective please share the show okay we're constantly battling traffic throttles
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shadow bans censorship of all different kinds and we need your help to get the message out so
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uh if you could be so kind as to do your part of the deal which my part is to give you free
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information your part is to share the show so don't be a hoe share the show yeah what's up what's
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good oh not much bro i drank a diet soda last night fuck my stomach is fucked up well you don't drink
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soda at all i know i never do that's why yeah i you know i love diet cokes bro i used to love uh
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diet mountain dew like but dude i drank like one and my stomach is just fucked yeah i'm glad i got
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away from it though yeah yeah i mean i like that anyway so i heard i heard oh this thing shit so i
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heard that but you and madat and z sean all went and got sushi and didn't invite me and joe and joe
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call it united nations that's i feel i feel like this is i feel like there were some lines drawn in the
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sand it was almond dot's fault what i was hungry there really was we were just talking about sushi
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what's that yesterday joe yesterday we're over here talking about sushi ai and you fucking assholes
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go you know i can't eat any anyway but i could have liked an invite well so joe would you have
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liked to have been invited yep what it was what it was we actually i actually did an advance on the
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location oh that's what it was so i could go next time for you that makes sense to make sure that
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that's what it was you guys are so thoughtful yeah i got you bro yeah i got you i appreciate you
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yeah all right man enough fucking around i'm trying to be serious today put on your game face
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we're gonna make some people better that's the same face
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that's the same face bro i got tagged in a story today i thought it was pretty good
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this guy uh this guy he follows me and you and i don't follow him i never saw him before but it
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showed up in my tag stories and he wrote you know i disagree with about half of what these guys say
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but i believe they're trying to do the right thing and they're super entertaining i love it and
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he shared the show love it i thought that was cool oh that's cool you're still wrong but you're cool
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yeah you are wrong for sure yeah but you know what i love dude i love that our listeners
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are they're not like typical you know oh he said one thing fuck him unfollow like they're reasonable
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people that critically think and have disagreements and you know say hey you know i understand where
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you're coming from here but what about here and i i like that you know that's what that's what
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this is supposed to be yeah you gotta be out of the box thing yeah and as long as people are
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cool about it you know cool and respectful yeah i agree man it's cool 100 but you're still wrong
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yeah definitely wrong but um yeah man well let's make some people better today let's uh let's do
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that let's see what we can get done here i got three good ones for you yeah let's knock these out i'm
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shocked uh guys andy question number one uh andy is being a quote-unquote hard worker a skill or a
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trait i've always felt like i've always took my time and took the slow and steady approach to deliver
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quality work i feel like the i'm a hard worker gets overused a lot and it's associated with like
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balls to the wall and or speed and quickness so can you give us some insight what is the proper
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definition of a hard worker um what does that really mean and uh how do you not fuck it up
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well do you think michelangelo worked hard on the sculpture of david
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do you think do you think he worked hard i think he worked hard and long okay did do you think
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that he worked hard uh to paint the ceiling of the sistine chapel do you think that was hard work
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yeah do you think he did it fast no no he was just diligent he showed up every day he did what he
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needed to do he did it at a high level and he's highly skilled okay so you have to understand hard work
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doesn't mean speed it also doesn't mean slow it means i'm showing up i'm relentlessly giving my
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best effort to produce my best product all right and there is a speed factor there right like if
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you're a hard worker and you produce a good product but other people produce as good of a product and
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half the time they're better than you that's a higher skill set all right so hard work is the
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prerequisite it is the foundation you will never find a successful person that doesn't have that
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as their foundation they show up every single day they give it everything they have they do diligent
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work which means they put in massive amounts of effort at a high level they're consistent with that
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now there's lots of people that work hard that never ever ever become successful financially
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because they don't apply an in-demand skill to the hard work all right there's lots of people
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that work really hard digging ditches every day and that are digging ditches when they're 70 years old
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there's lots of people who work really really hard for a long time and never make it and that's
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because working hard is just part of the puzzle the other part of the puzzle is how high your skill set
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is how developed your skill set is and so we have these people that say these things like
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work smart not hard all right well you're a fucking moron all right i'm going to tell you that right now
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because it takes both it takes hard work and it takes smart work so while you have to be putting in
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the work and you have to be showing up and you have to be giving it all you have you have to consistently
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be aware and conscious of the intentional skill set that you are building along the way if you do
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not have the skill set and you just work hard you're going to get paid a fraction of what you could get
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paid if you actually intentionally built skills to go along with it and so because people usually learn
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most of what they learn from their parents from their teachers from their aunts from their uncles
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and because most people grow up in a very uh you know regular environment they're not surrounded by
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successful people they're not surrounded by people who have actually built things they don't really
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even know anybody in real life that has actually built things it's very hard for them to understand
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that their parents and their aunts and their uncles who haven't done anything don't know that much
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about how to become successful at doing things because they haven't done that all right so we end up
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listening to our family and our in our immediate circle our immediate network of people about what
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it actually takes and what usually comes out of those conversations from the old people is oh man
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you know you can work as hard as you want but the system's still going to be the system and you're not
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going to get ahead they don't care about you blah blah blah blah blah blah blah and the reality is is
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those people will probably gave it their all for a little bit five ten years maybe but they didn't work on
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developing their skill set they weren't intentional about becoming better they believe that if they
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just show up and they give it their effort that eventually things will materialize and when those
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things don't materialize they get bitter and they get pissed off and they start blaming other people
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they blame their job they blame their situation they blame capitalism they make up all these excuses
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as to why they're not getting where they want to get when in reality they're just missing part of the
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equation and the reason that they don't know about the part of the equation about gaining skill
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as you put in the hard work is because nobody around them ever did that all right so how do
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you know something that nobody around you knows it's very difficult so we have to like reframe our
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thinking about these statements it's not just hard work and it's not just smart work it's both and if
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you lack both you're going to be paid very little and if you have both you're eventually going to be
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able to write your own check in life of where you want to go you know it's interesting man because i think
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you know when you were talking about this it's like i have this image in my head of just somebody
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that's just spinning their wheels uh-huh like the wheels are fucking moving there is an output of some
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type of energy but like you're not going anywhere right and i feel like most people like that's an
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innate fear that they have is like i'm gonna do this and not do the work but then we're dishonest about
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the actual work that we're putting in yeah oh yeah you know i'm saying can we talk a little bit about
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that yeah i mean look dude that's an honest fear most people have look man most people drastically
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overestimate the amount of work that they do that's just the way it is you know this is a cultural
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phenomenon all right everybody wants to brag about how hard they work everybody wants to brag about how
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busy they are but the reality is is that success doesn't give a how busy you are
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it cares about how effective you are okay and if you're effective at a lot of because you work hard
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and you have high skill you're going to get further in life this shouldn't take much logic to figure out
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you're working hard you have a a c plus skill set okay you're going to get somewhere you're working
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hard you have a plus skill set you're going to get 10 times further in half the time all right this is
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what people don't understand so yeah you have to be honest about what you're putting in which most
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people aren't honest with themselves about anything most people look in the mirror and they're you know
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350 pounds and i know this because this was me and they say they don't say hey you're a fat fuck you
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need to change they say you know they suck in their gut and they look from the side and they're like
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you know i look all right i'm good i just wear this black shirt you know it'll cover me up you know uh
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and then they live their life that way they live their life lying telling themselves that they're
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good when they aren't good and then they get mad about the results that they fail to produce and
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this is a big problem dude and another thing is i noticed this with especially young people and
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really it's not even it's not a fair i guess it's not a fair thing to say especially young people
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because i think it's all people most people have very tough time understanding that success and winning
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is something that you have to seize you have to take it it's not something that is going to come
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to you all right like if you want to raise you think you're worth more you have to figure out how
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to prove that to the people above you and go sell yourself and have a conversation hey steve i did this
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i did this i did this i did this i did this i i feel like i'm worth a little bit more money or this
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is what i think is fair like you have to and people don't even do that right like people won't even have
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that conversation because they don't have the evidence and what they end up doing is they end
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up quitting places and they say oh that place sucked no you sucked you sucked that place didn't
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suck at all you didn't even have the courage to go up and ask how you could get better you didn't
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have the courage to go up and say hey what do i need to do to get here because this is where i'd
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like to be you didn't even have that you just stop whatever you're doing you go on the internet you
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type up some bullshit victim pussy shit about oh i'm gonna go fucked by this place or you know
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another place blah blah blah taking a bro fuck off okay there's millions and millions and millions and
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millions and millions of tens of millions of people who have accomplished what it is that you're trying
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to accomplish who come from harder places worse places more difficult places than you and we have
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a society and the truth is people don't want to hear this but it is true we have a society of
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completely soft marshmallow motherfuckers okay they're not successful in any area of their life
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they're not fit they're not mentally fit they're not good at their work they're not good in relationships
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but somehow it's everybody else's fault that they suck bro look in the mirror bro look at your life
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look at the decisions you're making look at the work you're putting in tell yourself the truth and the
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answer will become apparent and once you tell yourself the truth you are now free to change
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the situation but people are so afraid of the truth and they're so afraid of confronting themselves
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with things that might hurt their ego that they continue to lie they continue to tell fairy tales
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and at the end of their life nothing has materialized and they can't figure out why so i got
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screwed or it just didn't work out for me or it was god's plan for me to be a loser no it wasn't
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that was your plan that's a result of your actions i love it i love it man guys any question number two
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uh hey andy i am 25 and i am building my insurance book for business uh from scratch
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i feel like i have glimpses of when i am hyper focused on my goals and then days and even weeks
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when i feel like i am not even when i am doing my power list i still feel that i am not 100 focused and
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feel like every little thing distracts me and gets me off path is this a discipline problem
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or do i need to do a better job at eliminating things that knock me off path thank you for all
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you do how do you maintain that focus is that is that discipline um or do you need to be trying to
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figure out what's happening around you well look first of all you have to understand that discipline
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doesn't imply that it's going to be easy discipline implies that it's going to get done even when you
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don't feel like it so there's a lot of times when you're exercising high levels of discipline
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that you're like i don't want to be doing this it's extremely hard i'd rather be doing other things
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i'm not really focused on this but the thing gets done regardless because of the discipline so just
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because it's hard doesn't mean you don't have discipline discipline is required to do the things
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that are hard when you don't feel like doing them that doesn't mean they're going to feel less hard
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it just means they're still going to get done and if you take inventory of your life and everything
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you ever told yourself you wanted to be and you go back in time and you say what if i had been able
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to adhere to the plan i laid out in front of my path for me to get where i wanted to go
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and i had stuck to that no matter what what would my life look like now what would my life look like
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if every single time i told myself i was going to get in great shape i actually followed through the
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first time what would my life look like if all the times i told myself i was going to take my
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career more seriously i just did that the first time where would i be now right it's a life-changing
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skill set being able to have high discipline that does not mean that it's easy you can't look at someone
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who is constantly it's almost insulting to look at someone who is constantly working hard and think that
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it's easy for them to work hard it's not easy bro i struggle every day i'm so dude i am so physically
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sore every day like i don't want to lift weights i don't want to do i could barely i'm dude i'm i'm
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like a lot older than you motherfuckers most of you okay like i'm sore you think i want to go train
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with weights you saw me going to train with weights today the first thing i said when i got up is i'm
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like don't get old you know what i'm saying like my back's stiff my knees are stiff my elbows are stiff
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i'm fucking it's not fun it hurts i'm in pain when i train uh and don't fucking message me all
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this fucking bullshit about touching the grass joe's got some green teeth i know i know what i'm
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doing okay like i'm gonna get all these messages from dudes i've been training i've been training for
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30 fucking years yeah okay i'm gonna get all these people who are new fitness influencers telling me i
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need to fucking do butthole stretches or some shit send me a video let me let me check your phone yeah
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right i'll come over and stretch out your anus i bet you will so so dude anyway my point is is that
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don't message me some dumb shit all right my point but my point is is don't look at people who are
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doing all these hard things and insult them by thinking that it's easy just because they're doing
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it there's a lot of shit i do every single day i don't fucking feel like doing a lot in fact most of
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the shit that i do every day i don't want to do all right it's hard what i do is very very hard it's
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very very stressful it's very very there's a lot of weight to carry it's hard it never gets easy
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and you've seen that firsthand bro dj's around me as much as almost anybody and i mean dude just
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honestly there's days you know that it crushes me dude like fucking straight up but does the
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shit get done on the days of crushing it gets fucking done and that's what matters about discipline
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so just because you think it's hard and just because you think that you don't feel it or you're
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you're not catching it and you're going to have off days doesn't mean that's something that's that's
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it that's how it's supposed to be bro you're mistaking it thinking that once you develop a
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strong discipline that things are just easy that's not the way it is right i love that yeah so didn't
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he have another part of his question just maintaining the focus so so with that so is this a focus issue
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right like he's you feel like he has issues maintaining his focus on things that he knows he's supposed to
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be doing yeah well if you're having one of those days dude it's always a good thing to sit down
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and you know remember why it is you're doing it you know what i mean and usually if you can remember
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that what you're doing is not really for you it's for everybody else then you have more of a you have
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more ability to sort of harness that internal energy that internal focus to get shit done right like
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yeah i don't have kids at home but i look at all these people here as my kids i look at all these
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people here as my little brothers and my little sisters that i gotta do my or they're
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gonna starve okay so there's a lot of pressure when you think like that and and if i didn't think
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like that i probably wouldn't be as effective because i would just be doing things for me
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i seriously doubt i'd be here six seven days a week working if i was doing it just for me at this
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point in my life you see what i'm saying so we got to find external motivations and external causes
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and take a minute when we're not focused and say okay well this is why i'm doing this
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just take five minutes and reflect and say hey why am i doing this yeah what who's benefiting from
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this who's depending on this and that will help get you focused and then also i think another thing
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is um is that you know you can always manufacture the momentum you know when you when you force
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yourself through three or four days that are hard eventually that momentum kicks back in and it
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starts to get easy again and yeah after a while it's going to get monotonous but if you force yourself
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for another three or four days it starts to get easy again so it's just it's ebbs and flows and i
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would i would really caution everybody to not make the mistake of thinking that just because someone
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is disciplined and just because it looks easy from the outside that's that doesn't mean it's easy it
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just means they're just doing what they need to do and as long as you do what you need to do um
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you know how you feel about it really is irrelevant like when you're at when you're in the
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place you want to be and you've built the business you want to build or the life you want to build
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it should be very easy for you to look back and say i'm proud of that you're not going to remember
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all the times you didn't feel like it like i don't look back at like where i'm at now and and think like
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you know fuck dude i remember all those days in 2006 where i didn't feel like no like i don't even
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think about it it's like going on a trip dude like you never remember the fucking airplane ride
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you remember being on the trip you know what i mean and so that's that's how it is like so
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you're going to have hard times i love that because and i feel like i've seen this in work
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too man with with you because it's like what you're saying is like in those hard times kind
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of realign your intent yeah right like like you for example like i know your calendar bro you'll you'll
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go from this meeting that's tailored for this specific department in this company and you'll walk
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right into another office in a completely different business you know i'm saying and so like
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maintaining you realign that intent in that meeting how does that work for you i mean that's that is a
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that's a difficult skill to develop yeah it's still difficult for me at 25 years of doing this yeah
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because if i'm focusing all my intent all my energy all my thoughts all my creativity all my problem
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solving solutions which is really my biggest thing in this one area and then i have to walk into this
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completely different area and do the same thing it takes and then do it in a snap
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it's honestly it's a skill dude it's you just do it over and over and over again but i could tell
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you out of all the skills that i've had to learn to be an effective ceo that's probably the hardest
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one being able to switch my focus from this one to that one on the fly and you know it i don't really
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have a plan for it other than it's just one of those things you have to do yeah i love it yeah love
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it interesting thought provoking yeah there you go mixing it up guys and let's get lovely lovely
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answer yeah lovely um guys andy our third and final question question number three uh hey andy and dj
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i want to say thank you andy for your spirit of giving and courage to be vocal uh and hashtag
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real af my question is how do you maintain a high level of hunger i consider myself a disciplined
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person i don't drink i don't party or go out i just started 75 hard i work a competitive sales job
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i just find myself looking back in certain periods of my life and thinking to myself
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i wanted it a lot more back then um or i was making way more sacrifices there and way more discipline and
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hunger there i know i'm doing okay for myself but i also am still on a journey uh away from my
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end goals and can be definitely be doing a lot better i'm looking for that same drive and hunger
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i know i'm capable of um and i'm not really sure what the answer is to getting to that level and
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maintaining it how do you stay hungry um you got to set bigger goals okay you got to put yourself in
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an intentional position that you're extremely far away from where you want to be so that you understand
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every day i have to get up and go at it as if it's day one right so in the and by the way this is for
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this advice i'm about to give is not for everybody this is for here on this show we are speaking to
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the most driven the most hungry the most ambitious people on the planet or you wouldn't listen straight
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up you go listen to all these other guys they're way softer than me they're way less intense they
00:24:22.260
they want to work so they can live their life i want to work so i can win okay there's a big difference
00:24:29.460
i'm talking to the people who want to win there's lots of people to get to a certain point and they
00:24:35.460
do the math and they figure out i got enough money to go live my life totally cool bro totally get it
00:24:42.420
i'm not wired that way i'm wired to be the best i'm trying to be the best ever all right and i know
00:24:50.340
that's unrealistic like you might hear that and say oh but you ask why i fucking could why i wake
00:24:56.500
up every day and go hard because i'm so far away from where i want to be that i i have to i don't have
00:25:03.620
a choice and i'm serious about getting there like when i say we're going to build first form into the
00:25:08.580
next quote unquote iconic american brand like the nikes and the underarmors and the like that
00:25:14.980
i'm serious and we're very far away from that and so i wake up every day and i go hard as
00:25:19.700
fuck when i when i wake up every day and i say hey i want to be in the top point zero zero zero zero zero
00:25:26.180
one percent of men my age i'm serious about that and i know there's other dudes that are my age that
00:25:32.660
are kicking my fucking ass i'm serious about that not many but i'm they're they're out there but i don't
00:25:38.420
want to be kind of the best i want to be the best and so for me this is about setting bigger goals
00:25:45.380
all right and i learned this lesson uh a number of times because over the 25 years that i've been
00:25:52.420
in business there's a lot of times where i felt the way that this person is describing where i was
00:25:57.860
i got a little bit soft i got a little bit comfortable i got a little bit complacent and
00:26:01.460
that's easy to do when you've got a decent house and you're driving a nice car and you got a few bucks in
00:26:07.060
the bank it's real easy to tell yourself man i'm doing good i can just relax the problem is
00:26:13.140
is that eventually you're not going to be doing so good because the whole flow of success and the
00:26:19.700
whole flow of society and progress is like a river it's always moving all right now if you get off the
00:26:26.740
river and you say fuck i'm good i'm i'm kind of tired of swimming you know even though you're swimming
00:26:31.460
down the stream i'm going to take a break and you get off on the riverbank all the motherfuckers that
00:26:36.020
were up the river a mile up the road they're going to fucking pass by you okay so you have to stop
00:26:42.020
and say what do i really want to be how far away am i from that and be honest with yourself and then
00:26:48.900
take the appropriate action so i can't tell someone who is where they want to be and comfortable
00:26:59.300
by design that they need to go expand their vision because this is their vision their vision is
00:27:04.420
that but there's things to be cognizant of if you stop and get out of the river and and that's this
00:27:10.580
you think you have a lot of money now but what about 15 years from now what about 20 years from
00:27:14.980
now what about 40 years from now do you have 40 years worth of money living at your lifestyle
00:27:19.940
and does that consider uh inflation and the devaluation of dollar or emergencies or economic collapse
00:27:27.700
we need a lot more money than what we think we need we need a lot more success than what we think we
00:27:32.580
need and i think it's very very dangerous as a man considering that it's our job to build and
00:27:38.260
provide and inspire and show the way for us to think that we have it made at any point in our lives
00:27:43.460
because you don't you never know what's going to happen and at the end of the day if you keep going
00:27:48.340
you'll be in a position where you can do all kinds of really good stuff for people so to sum this up
00:27:53.940
you have to expand your vision you have to say all right i'm here and where i really want to be is
00:28:04.500
here and i'm a gazillion miles away from that and so i have to work hard just like you had to work
00:28:10.260
very hard on the real day one to get where you are now you see what i'm saying so it's about expanding
00:28:16.260
vision expanding potential and i i would challenge anybody you know that thinks like oh man i'm in a
00:28:20.900
in a really good spot and and i okay well if you're you know a lot of a lot most of our people
00:28:26.340
i think believe in god that listen to the show if you're the product of god and god gave you all this
00:28:32.820
potential and you only decide to squeeze out half the potential do you think you're honoring god or do
00:28:38.260
you think you're failing god something to think about okay so i think about that so i think it's our
00:28:45.300
job and i think success is ultimately defined by us making a commitment to the pursuit of our own
00:28:52.340
true potential understanding that our own true potential can never be realized because eventually
00:28:57.060
we run out of time but and by the way as we gain skills along the journey the potential on the
00:29:03.460
backside of it expands if you were to take someone who was 90 years old with that whole life experience
00:29:09.460
and put them back at 30 think what they could achieve because of what they know you see what i'm
00:29:13.620
saying but they eventually run out of time and they die but if you commit to that and you squeeze all
00:29:19.620
the juice out when you're gonna die you could at least look at yourself and say well i did it you
00:29:25.780
know what i'm saying i squeezed all the juice out of what i had you can feel good about it and um
00:29:31.460
you know everybody has a different path of how they want to live and i'm not here to tell people how
00:29:35.540
to live but you asked how to get hungry again uh you should probably realize that that you ain't
00:29:40.740
shit that's what you should realize and and and dude you know that's why when people and you hear
00:29:45.620
this because you're around me all the time they come up to me and they say andy congrats on everything
00:29:50.260
you've done man thank you for everything you've done congratulations it's amazing what you've done
00:29:54.260
and i'm like bro i'm just getting fucking started i this is day one because i mean that that's legit i
00:30:00.180
legitimately mean that like bit one of the coolest things about an entrepreneurship as in business
00:30:06.180
is that it's one of the only games that you can play over the course of your whole life
00:30:11.300
and the older you get the better you get right because like for me to compete against a 30 year
00:30:17.620
old guy i've got 15 years more real experience than that guy like what he's going to have to figure out
00:30:23.780
i already figured figured out so if i continue to go i could scale up my success at a much faster rate
00:30:31.220
in my 40s than i could in my 30s because of the experience that i have all right so i set my goals
00:30:36.260
big bro like in real big like you know people like to say well comparison is the thief of joy well it's
00:30:42.420
also the driver of realizing your ultimate potential all right i love it man i love it that was three man
00:30:50.580
yeah that's the midweek drop yep yep all right guys cti tomorrow again we're going to start hitting you
00:30:56.660
on a regular basis with those ctis like i told you yesterday we've got mf ceo project dropping soon
00:31:01.780
i'll keep you guys in the loop on that if you want to get in the loop on that go to my website andy
00:31:06.580
versella.com subscribe to the andy gram that same email address will get you notified for mf ceo
00:31:12.900
plus you're going to get all my posts you know one of the things that you guys tell me you're like
00:31:17.460
well you know you should post and i do think about posting but honestly i do post every day i've posted
00:31:22.580
more in the last four years than anybody on earth it just comes in terms of an email as opposed to
00:31:27.620
being on instagram so go subscribe you'll get my posts every single day uh right there in the
00:31:32.580
morning time and uh you'll be notified when mf ceo project launches again and we start getting you
00:31:37.140
guys on the road to uh changing the world so i appreciate you guys i love you guys don't be a hoe