REAL AF with Andy Frisella


783. Q&AF： Feeling Like A Fraud, Turning Employee Into Leader & No Man's Land


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Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of Q&A, Andy and Af join me to talk about the importance of mental toughness and how to develop it in your life. We also talk about getting older and how it can be a blessing and a curse.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 what is up guys it's andy priscilla and this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies 0.98
00:00:21.100 the fakeness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today
00:00:26.520 we have q and af we always start the week off with some good get better information uh now if you 0.64
00:00:34.580 want to have your questions answered on the show you can go about that a couple different ways the
00:00:38.360 first way is guys email these questions in to ask andy at andy for salad.com or you go on youtube on
00:00:44.080 the q and af episodes drop your question in the comments and we'll choose some from there as well
00:00:47.860 now through the week we're going to have different shows within the show all right tomorrow we're
00:00:52.580 going to have cti that stands for cruise the internet that's where we put topics of the day
00:00:57.080 up on the screen we speculate on what's true on what's not true and then we talk about how we the
00:01:02.080 people have to solve these problems going on in the world other times we're going to have what's called
00:01:06.180 real talk real talk is just me giving you 5 to 20 minutes of what i think is some real talk uh we
00:01:12.820 cover you know anything from personal development to what's going on in the world you never know what
00:01:16.320 you're going to get there uh but we keep it real and then we have 75 hard verses now 75 hard verses
00:01:22.500 where someone who has completed the 75 hard program comes on the show they talk about how they were
00:01:28.440 before how they were after and how they've used the 75 hard and the live hard program to transform
00:01:35.060 their life now you can get the full live hard program and if you didn't know 75 hard is just the
00:01:41.500 initial phase of that for free at episode 208 on the audio feed if you're unfamiliar with the live
00:01:47.620 hard program it is the number one world's most popular mental transformation program in history
00:01:54.420 okay and you get that episode 208 on the audio feed for free now there is a book called the book
00:02:00.280 on mental toughness which includes the entire live hard program which is good it's more in depth it's uh
00:02:06.060 for people that need to know the nuts and bolts and all the details like me um and then it also
00:02:11.520 has a whole bunch of chapters on mental toughness why it's important how to develop it and how to use
00:02:15.420 it in your life along with a number of case studies on some famous people who have used mental toughness
00:02:19.640 to become the famous people that you recognize you can get that book at andypriscilla.com now one thing
00:02:24.660 you're going to notice about the show is we don't run ads on the show uh we are and i'm very very
00:02:30.320 confident about this the the biggest show in the world that doesn't run ads and the reason that we don't
00:02:35.060 run ads is because we keep it real here and i don't want to listen to people telling me what i can
00:02:39.400 and can't say or what i can and can't talk about and in exchange for that i ask very simply that you
00:02:44.380 guys help us share the show okay we're constantly dealing with censorship throttling having shows
00:02:51.080 removed etc etc etc we need your help okay so if the show makes you think if it makes you laugh
00:02:57.660 gives you a new perspective do us a favor and help us share the show we got a little thing we like to
00:03:03.520 say here it goes like this don't be a hoe show the show all right what's up dude what's going on 0.98
00:03:08.360 brother oh not much green's a good color on you is it yeah i didn't know i was debating i don't think
00:03:13.620 i've seen you in green like that yeah i was debating i was just feeling a little different
00:03:18.020 today yeah you know it really brings out the uh the silver in my beard the silver fox
00:03:24.540 i mean since you brought it up i'll tell you what dude getting older is a weird thing man
00:03:29.860 is it yeah because like i still feel 25 but then i look in the mirror and it don't look 25 0.96
00:03:34.020 motherfucker i could jump listen i'm gonna tell you this i'm as good of an athlete as anybody for 0.97
00:03:40.660 this age that's a fact so no i love it man i love it what's up with you oh nothing much man 0.99
00:03:46.620 birthday party this weekend birthday party was great um birthday party was great i dude i
00:03:52.420 threw down on the grill do you throw down at the table too no actually not much uh it was more of
00:04:00.340 an act of service no it's always weird man like when i'm cooking like like cooking like that i don't 0.94
00:04:04.360 even really be hungry yeah you know i'm saying like everybody else fucking it's weird i don't know i get 0.95
00:04:08.200 it um no dude i just wanted to show you guys this because i'm very proud of it it's a uh a recipe i 0.75
00:04:14.160 made myself okay you're gonna put it up here on the screen it's smoked steak queso oh you were telling
00:04:21.820 me about that how'd that turn out bro it was it was probably the best thing i've ever i've ever
00:04:26.940 created in my life to be honest are those onions those are smoked onions yeah see that i couldn't
00:04:33.260 eat that yeah it looks good otherwise though listen it was so fucking good those onions are huge bro 0.96
00:04:40.380 bro who eats onions that big bro you like onions i fucking love onions bro onions garlic no onion 0.99
00:04:48.440 it's not even real food it's a fucking joke what do you mean you never heard the king's theory on 0.98
00:04:53.320 onions no what is it oh bro what do you mean oh wait listen hold on onion's not even supposed to be 0.97
00:04:59.240 eaten okay i have a theory on this i call it the king's theory the king's theory yeah so a long time 0.83
00:05:06.500 ago back in you know the old days where there was kings and shit yeah the old old days you know 0.90
00:05:12.560 where there was kings and shit yeah the king in the jester they said hey we're gonna play a joke 0.97
00:05:18.820 on people i'm gonna tell everybody this little weed that you pull out of the ground is food and 0.93
00:05:23.640 we're gonna watch them eat it and they're all gonna pretend like they like it because i'm gonna say i 0.94
00:05:26.640 like it so this king you know he went out to all his people and he fucking held the onion up and he 0.93
00:05:31.840 said hey this is the best food ever and then all the little people went out and started eating it 0.99
00:05:36.320 and that's how it became a food because there's no reasonable person that could say that onion 0.95
00:05:40.220 fucking taste good i mean i think they taste they taste fine nah bro it's a joke you fell for it 0.99
00:05:45.920 damn the king got me yeah the king's theory bro three hours though three hours to make some queso 0.99
00:05:52.020 three hours and i put on the smoker so like the cheese did you put the cheese in the smoker too 0.99
00:05:56.400 yeah oh i bet that was good yeah that's not like it's all smoked and then i mean i seared the steaks 0.91
00:06:00.520 and shit but yeah the steak looks cooked right bro it's perfect that's a good how do you like your 0.79
00:06:05.480 you medium rare we always order the same steaks yeah medium rare with a with a with a crust on 0.99
00:06:10.120 outside hard cereal called pittsburgh cereal yep that's right yeah so just a little food porn for
00:06:15.420 you guys yeah um yeah man other than that everything else was good everything else was good it wasn't 0.98
00:06:21.540 too bad at all i didn't do shit yeah fucking worked finally worked out you know i tore my peck back in 0.99
00:06:29.840 the beginning of august i haven't really told anybody that but yeah kept it on download yeah i was cruising 0.98
00:06:34.720 and i tore my peck not a major tear but just in the in the belly and uh finally trained chest 1.00
00:06:40.580 yesterday a little bit felt okay weren't too bad no all right well sweet man well it is uh i don't
00:06:46.800 think i'm about back in the saddle with that yeah yeah i mean how long is like are those recoveries
00:06:51.580 it depends on how bad that's not like a surgical tear not in the middle of the muscle no but uh it
00:06:57.380 you know it depends on how bad it is i think mine was pretty uh as much as it bruised and everything
00:07:02.360 i think it was still pretty minor yeah sweet man well um it is q a all right some people better
00:07:09.160 today let's do it guys any question number one uh andy i recently got a promotion at work
00:07:15.300 uh for a position that i truly wanted i felt like i was qualified for i went through the
00:07:21.120 interview process like everyone else the only difference was i didn't meet their educational
00:07:27.100 requirements i had two interviews i felt like i crushed both and at the end of the day
00:07:32.260 ended up getting the promotion i i was very excited and i felt like i deserved to be here
00:07:36.920 and still do i've been in this position for about two months now and i can't help but feel
00:07:42.140 like i'm not being an asset to the team i have classes scheduled and i'm starting to take courses
00:07:47.200 to get uh certain certificates i just can't help but feel right now of being more of a liability
00:07:53.340 than an asset i'm putting in the effort to get to that position of an asset and i won't stop
00:07:58.660 until i am by reading books uh for this specific position and whatnot just at the moment am i a
00:08:05.500 fraud no i look first of all let me let me give you uh some praise here the fact that you feel that
00:08:13.620 way is a great thing because it means you care it means you care not just about yourself and getting
00:08:18.620 the promotion it means you care about the team and the mission and what we're trying to do and and to
00:08:23.980 be quite honest i think the best teammates of any team whether it's been in sports or whether it's 0.98
00:08:29.500 been in business that i've been a part of are people who feel that way they feel like shit man 0.81
00:08:34.120 i'm not paddling you know hard enough or i'm not giving what i could or maybe i'm not doing enough 0.94
00:08:40.280 um which is the awareness that you need to get better so that you know you you weigh that against
00:08:47.520 what most people do is they get the promotion they don't care if they're actually contributing
00:08:51.340 and they kind of just take the money and cruise through right and so i think the mentality that
00:08:57.040 you have actually i don't think i know the mentality you have is the mentality of a high achiever
00:09:01.220 which is a great thing it's also the mentality of a great teammate so the fact that you feel that way
00:09:08.880 bro like that's actually a good thing because you're going to go out you're going to gain the
00:09:14.020 skills that you need to contribute in the proper manner uh and that's how every job up the scale of
00:09:22.820 you know your career is going to be you're going to move into that career having you know or into
00:09:28.120 that next position having a little bit of skill set but needing to develop more and if everybody
00:09:32.940 understood that they would continue to move up the ladder of success but they don't at some point they
00:09:37.600 get to a place where they sort of just rot because they quit developing and they quit caring and they quit
00:09:43.420 wondering if they're doing a great job uh or if they're contributing to the team and so they quit
00:09:49.240 doing personal development work they quit reading they quit you know trying to learn they quit trying
00:09:53.840 to gain skills and then they just sit there and rot and they wonder why oh i'm getting passed over for
00:09:58.800 this or i didn't get this opportunity well you didn't do your part man you know you didn't do the
00:10:03.400 part of personal development that is required by every single person there are very few companies
00:10:08.400 we're one of them uh but there's very few that actually take an interest in your personal
00:10:15.140 development and that's something that you have to do on your own time you have to have your own
00:10:18.860 initiative and it means you're going to have to pass on things that everybody else gets to go out and do
00:10:23.820 that are fun and you have to look at those things not as a sacrifice but as an investment as to where
00:10:28.640 you're going and so um i personally believe that this is a great thing you feel that way i think what
00:10:36.620 you need to do is continue to do what you're doing working to gain skills and it'll come and you'll
00:10:42.080 start contributing and what will happen is you'll become so good at what you're doing that you will
00:10:46.980 get off for the next position and the cycle will repeat itself a lot of people think that they work
00:10:52.000 their way up as an entrepreneur in an organization uh just over time they think if i'm here enough time
00:10:58.540 i'll get a promotion that's not true you have to crush it at your position and be undeniably great
00:11:05.900 and then the next opportunity will be presented to you and when you start that opportunity you're
00:11:10.780 probably going to be mediocre you're not going to know what to do and you're going to have to start
00:11:14.580 the process over and start learning and start acquiring skills and start doing the things you did
00:11:19.280 uh with the last position to gain the perspective and the skill in the new position and if you continue
00:11:24.720 to do that there will be no stopping your upward mobility but you know most people don't they get
00:11:29.900 to a place where they're making just enough money uh and they get comfortable and they start to just
00:11:34.320 sit and you know if they ask themselves honestly how'd you get to this place they were doing different
00:11:40.000 actions than what they're doing now and the minute you stop trying to get better the minute you stop
00:11:44.560 wanting to get better it's the best it's ever going to be it's all downhill because now you're not
00:11:49.580 playing offense anymore you're playing defense now you're starting to get into the politics aspect of
00:11:54.400 business where you know you're trying to block other people from passing you up as opposed to
00:11:59.420 being a contributing member of the team and just getting better and better and better and better
00:12:03.140 just being great yeah it's very simple dude a lot of every single problem in your life can be solved
00:12:09.500 very simply by being undeniably good at what you do that is it every single problem your problem of
00:12:16.100 confidence be undeniably good your problem of income be undeniably good your problem of relationship
00:12:22.840 be undeniably good if you're undeniably great at everything in every area you're not going to
00:12:28.160 have any problems and that is within the average person's capability if they would just take the
00:12:34.240 time to make the investment in themselves yeah i love it man i want i want to clarify on this too
00:12:38.300 man because i i feel like this is it is a a common like narrative it's a common like theme i guess
00:12:45.260 that you know you have to be this like you have to be 100 percent prepared you know in order to get
00:12:51.320 this next thing you know i'm saying i want to clarify that's what you're saying like that's 0.96
00:12:54.840 bullshit well it doesn't hurt to have those skills ahead of time but most people don't yeah most people 0.89
00:13:00.080 learn how to do a job in an undeniably great fashion on the job right you know we can go to 0.99
00:13:07.100 school we can read all the books we can watch all the youtubes you're still not going to get
00:13:12.260 great at something until you're actually doing it over and over and over and over right the practical
00:13:16.720 application yeah bro listen i could watch every video on playing the guitar i could read every book
00:13:21.400 about guitar mastery i could do every single thing i could do that for jujitsu but unless i sit down
00:13:27.440 and play the guitar and practice the guitar i'm not going to get any good at it i'm certainly not
00:13:31.880 going to be great at it same thing with jujitsu i could read all the theory i can go to all the
00:13:35.900 classes i can watch all the youtube but unless i'm rolling every single day with these dudes i'm not
00:13:40.600 going to get any better and so we have to understand knowledge and practical application
00:13:45.820 you get the knowledge and then you tune it and you become better through the reps and the application
00:13:52.100 of practice it's no different like you watch a video someone hit a baseball that doesn't mean you
00:13:57.220 could do it you gotta do that yeah that's right so uh it's very simple dude and for this person i
00:14:03.380 wouldn't beat yourself up i think you had the attitude of a high achiever my suggestion would be
00:14:08.480 just to make sure that you keep that attitude after you master this position for the next position
00:14:13.460 and the next one and the next one and eventually i mean dude we just i don't know if you guys saw but
00:14:18.400 nike got a new ceo do you know where the nike ceo started the new new nike ceo he started as an
00:14:24.700 intern okay and for 30 years he's worked his way up and worked his way up and worked his way up and
00:14:30.120 worked his way up and worked his way up starting as an intern and is now the ceo okay so think about 0.98
00:14:37.100 that yeah bro that that's so you see that shit in movies no listen it's highly probable for anybody 0.94
00:14:45.340 that is committed to that kind of development to eventually end up in a role like that if you do 0.99
00:14:51.140 it long enough and you know maybe it's not at the company you're at because the window may not be open
00:14:57.660 right but if you continue to gain skills and gain skills and gain skills on your own without being told
00:15:03.720 to without being pulled along dude you're infinitely valuable to somebody and maybe there's not the
00:15:09.780 opportunity at where you are but where you'll get in the right spot someday and you will you will win
00:15:14.980 a hundred percent dude i want to ask you there's one more piece on this question man because i think
00:15:18.560 this is a great point too um and this is i guess this answer will be more for the entrepreneurs right
00:15:24.320 um but for yourself right like you you've hired thousands of people you've employed thousands of
00:15:29.960 people as an entrepreneur how do you handle when you know a leader your your boss whoever it is in
00:15:37.520 that position and they see more potential in you than you see in yourself how do you like so what
00:15:42.840 what advice do you give to the entrepreneurs on that aspect because like somebody believed in this guy to
00:15:47.620 like promote them without the educational requirements right they heard the interviews they believed in his
00:15:52.180 potential to to do that and that's i feel like that's a difficult spot to be in as an entrepreneur when
00:15:57.100 you have somebody that believes in your potential more than you believe in your own potential well i
00:16:01.900 would listen to them because they have more experience than you and they know what it takes
00:16:05.300 and maybe you can't see it because you're you and you can't see your own greatness you can't see your
00:16:10.960 own potential because dude all of us as high achieving mindset people we never feel good enough we never
00:16:17.640 feel like we're doing enough we never feel like we're giving enough or contributing enough or winning
00:16:22.620 enough it always feels like a loss until you get the big win when you get the big win that lasts for
00:16:28.000 a minute and then you're back in the grind of building again and so i think all high achievers
00:16:33.760 at some point need some sort of validation from people that are further down the line and i think you
00:16:39.260 should listen to them because you know some of the greatest coaches in the world will come in and
00:16:44.420 tell you you know hey uh you got this potential and you're not listening to them that doesn't make sense
00:16:49.560 you know what i mean and uh you know a lot of this is is faith dude like a lot of this is
00:16:58.280 you know not in the religious sense of faith but faith that if i do the work the result will be there
00:17:04.760 and you have to understand all these people ahead of you they were the same as you at one point in time
00:17:09.780 they just believe that if they did the work that they would get better and and so dude i have this
00:17:15.500 saying and you guys all know that listening to the show for years the work comes before the belief
00:17:19.780 you have to do a little work before you actually believe and you work and work and work and work and
00:17:25.240 work and then it produces a little bit of result and then you say oh okay that works and it instills
00:17:30.660 a little bit of belief then you work and work and work and work and work and you get a little bit bigger
00:17:34.660 result and then you get a little bit more belief so the work always comes before the belief in
00:17:39.340 yourself and you have to have the faith that you are willing to do that work without a visible
00:17:44.420 result understanding that down the road it's going to pay off so the work comes before the belief
00:17:49.780 and even if you don't believe in yourself you have to listen to people like who are above you
00:17:54.380 who would you know potentially be a coach for you or a mentor to you who've recognized people just
00:18:00.920 like you have gone on to do great things i love it man i love it guys any question number two
00:18:06.940 first off i want to say how much i appreciate the podcast i've been listening since eighth grade
00:18:13.420 it has really transformed my mindset and helped me grow my business i'm 18 years old now and just
00:18:20.160 graduated high school last spring and i run a pressure washing business we also hang up christmas
00:18:25.300 lights and do snow removal we are currently doing around 20 to 30k per month dang um i currently have
00:18:32.900 one employee working for me who does okay on quality uh but likes to take his time and i don't
00:18:39.000 see the leadership potential in him um he also likes to ask for mental health breaks um this is someone
00:18:45.740 who i don't see fitting the culture i want to build within my company but he's also my only employee so i 0.64
00:18:51.180 kind of have to keep him around uh as i said i'm 18 so i'm probably don't know shit uh but is there a way 0.54
00:18:57.820 to turn an employee into a leader into a manager um or is it just something that they have to bring
00:19:03.020 to the table uh thanks again look yes you could definitely turn people into leaders where do you
00:19:09.260 think all the leaders come from they're not just born they don't come out and they're leaders like
00:19:13.760 that's not where it comes from someone took the time to invest in that person and cultivate the
00:19:19.100 leadership skill set now are there a lot of people that can't be coached in a leading yeah absolutely
00:19:23.580 and if someone's coming to you every third day with some mental health break or this or that
00:19:28.200 they're probably not ready for that in their life now maybe 10 years from now they will be i don't know
00:19:32.840 but absolutely you can help people become more leadership oriented and that means you have to take a
00:19:40.700 you have to take an interest in their personal development actively so you have to become their coach
00:19:46.800 and you have to be able to explain why doing things at a certain level is how we have to do them
00:19:53.340 in order for us to get where we're trying to go you know people aren't just going to come in and do
00:19:58.960 things at a high standard because you want them done at a high standard and they're not going to do
00:20:03.760 them um to the level of your high standards unless you take the time to explain why it's important
00:20:11.500 all right most people don't operate on a high standard in their job because most jobs aren't demanding
00:20:17.620 of a high standard most jobs it's just can i get someone and can they do the job and i'll say this
00:20:24.180 as a young entrepreneur don't get caught up in that because when you have not very many employees
00:20:29.720 sometimes small business operators will compromise their standards because they don't want to have to
00:20:36.120 go through the hiring process and what i can tell you is that is a sure way to hang yourself you don't
00:20:41.320 want to do that dude you want to find people that are going to work with you who are going to want to
00:20:45.400 build with you and that's going to come down to your ability to lead them so what are you trying
00:20:50.180 to do with your business that is going to benefit that employee all right where are you trying to
00:20:57.200 take it how are you trying to build it and does that employee's dreams and goals and life that they
00:21:03.480 want to build for themselves fit within that if it does you're going to find people that want to build
00:21:10.020 and want to create and want to be a part of what you're trying to do if you don't explain the big
00:21:15.780 vision properly and explain how we're going to get there the level of standard that we need to operate
00:21:21.580 to get there and then also where that person fits in how they can build their life within that umbrella
00:21:27.320 you're going to have problems that's the main job that you're going to have besides doing the actual
00:21:33.760 power washing and the Christmas light hanging right so um so yeah man you know nobody's going
00:21:41.540 to walk into your business and be this great leader you're going to have to build them you're
00:21:45.180 going to have to develop them and that's going to mean you're going to have to take an interest
00:21:48.360 in your employees and uh you know there's really no other way to do it so yes you can do it yes there's
00:21:55.900 people that can't be coached that way because they're not ready for it but i'll say this dude
00:22:00.460 you know when i was 16 17 uh i was lazy dude like super lazy like i at the the the jobs i had to do
00:22:12.720 which were hard which was doing concrete forms and then painting the stripes on parking lots 0.96
00:22:17.100 bro i was trying to get out of that shit as much as i could real talk i was probably the worst employee 0.94
00:22:22.300 but the reason i was the worst employee is because i didn't understand the outcome that i was trying to 0.98
00:22:27.260 contribute to i just looked at it as showing up late at night pushing a striper across the lot
00:22:32.680 and if i would have known like hey this is going to help me build what i've built now i would have
00:22:38.520 hustled my ass off you know what i'm saying so you know it's about vision casting and that's what my 0.87
00:22:44.720 partner in arte and my lead always talks about vision casting vision casting vision casting and
00:22:49.280 it's a common trait uh and skill set required by the leader of an organization or a team you know
00:22:55.000 hey guys you know nick saban right at alabama when he was there you know we have to get off the ball
00:23:00.500 fast we we're going to practice the play so many times that we can't get it wrong right that's the
00:23:07.300 level of detail that he operates at because he understands what it takes to win and so while
00:23:11.660 they're going through the plays over and over and over and over again he's talking about hey do you
00:23:16.280 want to win a national championship or do you want to be just another team that goes on the wall over
00:23:20.720 there it says that they're pretty good you see what i'm saying so he's constantly reminding his
00:23:25.280 team where they're going how it's going to benefit them how they're going to uh how these little
00:23:31.200 monotonous details are going to contribute to the outcome of their life and that's the job of a leader
00:23:36.900 and if you do that other people will come up and leave with you and some people won't
00:23:40.500 and the ones that don't you know you'll find you'll replace them with people that do over the course of
00:23:45.180 time i love that i want to follow up on this too i mean you know developing someone else around you
00:23:50.720 for him as the owner operator at 18
00:23:53.840 how much how much time and effort should he be putting into himself and developing himself
00:24:01.780 well it sounds like he's already put 10 years into it yeah you know or whatever what is it 18 12
00:24:07.440 eight years yeah you know i'm saying i mean but that's that is a that is a there's a stick around
00:24:13.300 young leaders dj bro that's a lifelong process yeah like there there are things that i am still
00:24:20.040 working on and i am a very experienced entrepreneur period okay there are things that i still need to
00:24:27.040 get better at there are things that every single leader can improve on uh phil knight the the ceo of
00:24:34.780 nike or the founder of nike there's still things he could get better at it's that's the beautiful
00:24:39.980 thing about business and leadership is it's not like football or baseball where there's like a cap on
00:24:45.660 how long you can play and how good you can get you can always get better and you can always improve
00:24:50.400 and you can always learn a new skill and personally that's why i like the game of entrepreneurship so
00:24:54.940 much because it's never ending i get to play the game my whole life you know what i'm saying whereas
00:25:00.040 like you know had i become a professional athlete which was my goal my whole life you know i'd be
00:25:07.040 done by now and i would be talking about what i did you know back in the day and you know um
00:25:14.100 i'm very thankful and grateful to to have found the game of entrepreneurship uh because it's something
00:25:22.920 that gives me a mission and a purpose um for my whole life you know so so like dude yes at 18 you
00:25:30.700 got a lot of work to do bro but guess what at 40 you still got a lot of work to do at 60 you still
00:25:36.240 got a lot of work to do it's just always evolving and that's why i talk about success being the
00:25:42.280 pursuit of your real potential not the actualization of your actual potential okay the true definition
00:25:49.460 of success for me is the commitment to the pursuit of your own true potential because if you can commit
00:25:56.160 to always getting better and you can also accept that you will never become the best you can be because
00:26:01.760 the game is everlasting now you're going to be in a winning position your whole life because
00:26:06.220 no matter how much success you have you're still going to be looking at yourself saying okay where
00:26:10.180 can i get better where can i improve how can i do this better next time and that's what winners do
00:26:14.980 bro i don't know a single high achiever i don't know a single billionaire i don't know a single guy
00:26:20.480 worth a hundred million dollars or even worth ten million dollars that feels like they're winning 0.99
00:26:25.280 all the time i don't know like that's why i like these guys on the internet they're so full of shit 0.98
00:26:30.200 okay they don't even know how to play the game they couldn't run one of my stores for a single 0.99
00:26:34.940 fucking day that's a fact okay real people that are building real shit they never feel like they're 0.98
00:26:40.740 winning they always feel like they got more to do or they could have done better if they're a true 0.99
00:26:44.960 winner you know what i'm saying look at michael jordan he talks about it he doesn't remember all
00:26:50.100 the shots that he made but he fucking remembers the ones he missed and that's the mentality of a real 0.87
00:26:55.400 winner dude they they look no matter what the outcome and how good it was they look at the areas 0.94
00:27:00.580 they could get better they break that down and uh you know they work on improving that so that
00:27:05.240 their game is more solid and and you know if you ever had a coach that was a great coach you know
00:27:09.860 you could win the game 42 to nothing and they're gonna be breaking down film be like dj why'd you
00:27:14.900 miss that block you cannot miss that block you're like coach i won we won and but he understands that
00:27:20.640 you're gonna play somebody one day and you're gonna miss that block it's gonna cost you the game 0.98
00:27:24.380 you see what i'm saying shit man that's real shit i love it man guys any uh third and final 0.96
00:27:29.880 question question number three hey andy i'd love some advice i've been listening to you since uh the 0.99
00:27:37.120 early mf ceo days to paint the picture for you i'm coming back yeah yeah it is uh to paint the picture
00:27:43.940 for you i am a 27 year old general manager of a motorcycle dealership with about 60 employees
00:27:50.160 i started seven years ago uh in an entry-level wash bay position uh then was given an opportunity
00:27:57.140 to join the sales team i was the number one salesperson in the company for a few years
00:28:02.100 um and now i'm in charge of a whole dealership and i absolutely love it now in my personal life i'm
00:28:06.620 engaged i have my first kid on the way i own a house on a rental property and i have a respectable
00:28:11.860 savings for my age um i am incredibly thankful for the position i'm in at 27 but some days i just feel
00:28:18.600 exhausted because it feels like everyone in my career and personal life need me to provide for
00:28:24.620 them train them make all the decisions and help them through situations they're in don't get me
00:28:29.920 wrong i want to be in these provider decision maker roles but i feel like i have nobody i can
00:28:36.500 personally talk to about these things um i don't have anyone in my life i can call to just get some
00:28:41.420 stuff off my chest uh too because none of them can relate um i have so many things that i keep
00:28:46.920 inside that just quietly eat me alive some days uh am i in no man's land um that's the question and
00:28:54.460 do you have any advice on places i could look for to find people who have been through where i uh where
00:29:00.260 i'm at that i could talk to about all this weight i have on my shoulders no therapy just someone
00:29:04.700 relatable uh to talk to you that doesn't need anything in return for me thanks andy for sure man
00:29:09.880 um you are in no man's land and for those of you that don't know what no man's land is
00:29:14.440 no man's land is when you first start out you know you have your friend group in high school
00:29:19.920 and you first start out and you say i'm gonna do this and all of them are like oh man are you sure
00:29:26.500 or have you thought this through uh you know most people fail at that thing and you start to go out
00:29:33.160 and build whatever it is it could be a you know it could be a motorcycle career it could be a business
00:29:38.500 it could be the church it could be a lots of different things but you're stepping outside
00:29:42.620 the the initial friend group that you have and you're starting to go down a path that none of
00:29:47.480 them are committed to and you start to hear all the chirping you start to hear all the criticism
00:29:51.380 and you find yourself in a position where you don't really relate to those people
00:29:55.900 and this is where the saying it's lonely at the top comes from but the thing is guys i'm gonna tell
00:30:03.020 you you're not at the top you've never been to the top i've never been to the top okay the mountain
00:30:07.560 is never ending so what happens is people get out here in this area where they don't feel like they
00:30:13.300 have anybody to talk to and instead of continuing down the path they actually go back and they just
00:30:18.580 say oh i'm gonna go back and be with these friends because it's comfortable and they're in their
00:30:22.640 career and their life and their goals sort of fall by the wayside but the other person who decides
00:30:27.340 to keep going they end up surrounding themselves with friends who are aligned with what they're
00:30:33.100 trying to build who they're trying to become and those people instead of pulling away and saying
00:30:38.080 are you sure or instilling doubt in you saying oh you know i don't know you know these people are
00:30:43.460 like yeah bro look we're doing the same thing and they start to help you right and if you continue
00:30:48.760 to go down the path and by the way those friendships are much better than the first friendships
00:30:53.180 okay so the friendship group gets better imagining having friends in your life all of them that
00:30:59.880 supported you and pushed you and helped you be better that's what it's like okay so you get in
00:31:04.360 that group and then if you progress and level up again the same kind of thing will happen because a lot
00:31:08.360 of those friends in the second group they will uh you know become complacent with where they're at
00:31:13.900 and you'll say i want to keep going and then you'll go through the process again and every time
00:31:17.700 you level up in life you're going to go through this process where you feel alone now to answer
00:31:22.520 your question uh yes you are in that spot uh and where do you find people and by the way just so
00:31:29.100 you know if you're in a leadership position if you're in uh a position of a general manager where
00:31:33.980 you have a responsibility of all these people dude it's a privilege to be in charge of that as much
00:31:39.760 pressure as it is it's a privilege to be the person that people come to for answers and if they
00:31:45.560 weren't coming to you for answers you would feel like you were missing something in your life
00:31:49.720 and so i could completely understand that i'm in that position as well uh anybody who's running
00:31:55.040 a business or the they're the decision maker in a business whether it be a manager ceo coo somebody
00:32:01.320 important in the organization they are dealing with the weight of everybody on their back like for me
00:32:07.600 dude almost everybody i know uh depends on me to get the fuck up out of bed and execute and that's a 0.91
00:32:14.880 lot of pressure and it's a lot of pressure when you really love these people and you care about them 0.57
00:32:19.400 you know what i'm saying so uh that comes with the territory and you just get used to it it's just
00:32:24.380 like a cold plunge the first time you get in it you're like ah and then after yeah and then after
00:32:29.560 a while you know five six days or you know in in this context it's years you start to get used to
00:32:35.220 the pressure but i'll tell you the truth dude there's still days where i struggle with this and
00:32:39.300 you know this and people around me know this it can get exhausting because you're trying to handle
00:32:44.260 your own shit and then you have everybody else dumping on you you know and it can be exhausting 0.73
00:32:49.600 um but how do you get around people that are like-minded which is very important you have to 1.00
00:32:57.020 you have to actively seek those people out okay you could uh join a group like rt syndicate where
00:33:02.600 there's lots of people who are successful and by the way uh you know when you get around people like
00:33:08.840 that again they're going to help you they're going to they're going to teach you they're going to
00:33:12.540 share information and it's going to make you better um you know you could seek out other
00:33:17.620 people that are in your uh you know realm of of of you know expertise so to speak uh you know maybe
00:33:26.820 maybe you find another manager who manages a similar dealership somewhere else or uh but i'd be careful
00:33:33.360 with that because a lot of people get in those roles and just because they're in that role doesn't
00:33:36.960 mean they're trying to get out of that role so you want to be around highly ambitious people
00:33:40.800 um who are driven to consistently progress who are going to teach you skills and share skills and
00:33:48.060 share information and quite honestly that's why ed and i started rt syndicate if you want to learn
00:33:52.400 about it you can go to rt syndicate.com um but you know getting around people that are driven
00:33:59.780 doesn't happen at the bar bro it doesn't happen just sitting at your house you have to actively seek
00:34:07.220 them out and you have to actively and intentionally work to build relationships with those people and
00:34:12.180 if you do you'll be welcomed in and you'll have much more rewarding and enriching and productive
00:34:18.040 friendships that will help you and your family and by the way you're 60 employees you see what i'm
00:34:23.320 saying so it's very very important and you know the old friend group they they don't get it they're 0.96
00:34:28.360 never really going to get it you know they're always going to say shit and then once you move into the 0.93
00:34:32.720 second group they're going to be saying oh you forgot where you came from are you left us behind 0.99
00:34:37.900 no i didn't leave you behind bro you could have came with me you could have came you don't say i
00:34:42.520 told you i was going over here you could have came with me so don't let those people guilt you don't
00:34:46.300 let those people wear you out um and understand that if you want to get better you've got it you've
00:34:52.320 got to actively seek out better and more productive relationships they're not just going to come to 0.64
00:34:57.020 you because those people are out doing shit right that's real man yeah you know something you know
00:35:01.620 because you've talked about the no man's land before and this is like a question i just thought 0.94
00:35:05.660 about here man but um i guess just more of a talking point too but you know i find it interesting
00:35:11.580 too that you know you leave that first group you got you know your new group right and they're these
00:35:15.100 people a little bit more ambitious right and then when when somebody in that group let's say it's not
00:35:18.820 you yet but they elevate and they go to the next level you're gonna have more people in that group 0.89
00:35:23.780 that will choose to move forward than not yeah so like that's awesome fucking motivation yeah that's 0.85
00:35:28.320 awesome fucking energy to have around you absolutely like like can we talk about a little 0.95
00:35:31.880 bit man well look dude i mean uh successful driven people generally enjoy competition now they might 0.99
00:35:38.300 say they hate their competition if they're super driven but they don't they they that's just immaturity 0.99
00:35:43.800 when you're immature you say i hate my competitors i fucking hate them when you start to mature a 0.99
00:35:49.440 little bit what happens is you start and by the way i used to be that guy but what happens is you start 1.00
00:35:54.260 to learn a little bit and and get a little bit more mature and you start to realize fuck dude 0.91
00:35:58.200 the guy that i'm competing with over there is like the only guy running with me so like i'm gonna 0.94
00:36:03.140 try to beat him he's gonna try to beat me and honestly some of my competitors in life have become
00:36:08.660 some of my very best friends because we push each other to be better and we value that relationship
00:36:13.900 any true winner there you get them on the field they're gonna want to crush okay they want to win
00:36:18.860 they don't want to win a little bit they want to win a lot however you get them off the field
00:36:22.640 they're sharing techniques they're sharing skill sets it's it's a they appreciate competition
00:36:27.980 because that's what drives a competitive person to improve so having friends that are competitive is
00:36:34.660 a great thing you know a lot of people are saying i'm only competing with myself i understand that and 0.99
00:36:39.480 that's true generally but having a little bit of kick in the ass because you see one of your homies 0.99
00:36:44.060 winning bigger than you that's that's also a good thing if you can be mature about it yeah or if you 0.99
00:36:49.060 have that relationship too it's like bro how the fuck you do that that's it yeah and dude what i've 0.98
00:36:53.320 i'd be real you know as i've moved from you know here to here to here to here and i'm continuing to 0.99
00:36:58.740 move uh the the higher up you go the more willing people are to share because they they've been
00:37:04.600 through the journey they've been through the grind and they're not threatened by someone else winning
00:37:09.300 they've learned the lesson of abundance they understand that there's plenty of room for everybody
00:37:13.220 to compete but yet they still look at you and they say hey i want to beat you listen bro i love you 0.99
00:37:18.440 i'm gonna beat your ass right right you know i'm saying right like if you and i go in a boxing ring 1.00
00:37:22.900 we're gonna fucking try to win right you know what i'm saying but we're gonna get out i'm gonna say 1.00
00:37:27.560 how the fuck did you do that well how'd you move like that what'd you do here it's probably a lot 0.99
00:37:30.920 like what you guys do in jujitsu you know i'm saying you know you get done with it um you know 0.99
00:37:36.680 whoever won won and then you start to how'd you get me in this shit yeah right exactly and like dude 0.85
00:37:41.520 that's how business is and the higher up you go the more willing people are to share the information 0.95
00:37:45.980 that's been my personal experience that's why it's important to get around people who have that
00:37:50.080 mindset because uh when they've been in the game and they're a little bit more successful than you
00:37:54.360 you know one of the things that successful people like the most is helping other people win it's very
00:37:58.900 rewarding it's very similar to like when you cook a meal for someone and you say and they enjoy it you
00:38:03.460 know you're it makes you feel good yeah you know not dude i get a lot of i get a lot of fulfillment
00:38:09.020 and a lot of uh pride in helping people win dude like for real and it doesn't matter who it is i just
00:38:17.660 like seeing people win and when you like seeing people win the universe and god says hey they like
00:38:24.360 winning they like seeing people win and they deliver more of that for you you know when you hate on people
00:38:29.440 and you get frustrated with people and you look at people and you get jealous in your heart about
00:38:34.760 you know it's not just what you say it's also what you believe you know if you see someone winning
00:38:39.300 and you're jealous in your heart about them winning you're telling the universe hey man i don't like
00:38:43.880 winning you know what the universe is going to give you a whole bunch of not winning all right so be
00:38:48.060 very careful and this is you know a little bit off the subject but be very careful how you feel
00:38:53.020 and how you think when you see someone winning all right and if you do feel like you're jealous
00:38:58.200 that that's okay you just got to work on that you got to start to learn to see it a different way
00:39:02.420 i love it man i love it man that's a hell of a way to start a monday man guys andy 0.94
00:39:06.820 that was three all right guys let's go out let's kick some ass we'll see you tomorrow with cti 0.99
00:39:11.840 went from sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a bowl fuck a stove counted millions in 1.00
00:39:19.600 the cold bad bitch booted swole got her on bankroll can't fold just a no headshot case close 1.00
00:39:26.780 closed 0.99
00:39:27.780 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:30.120 close
00:39:31.040 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:31.240 close
00:39:32.280 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:32.460 like we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:34.160 close
00:39:34.680 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:35.740 close
00:39:49.160 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:50.580 close
00:39:52.120 we'll see you tomorrow at night
00:39:54.180 close
00:39:55.280 roar