REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 799. Q&AF： How To Handle Theft In Your Business, Gaslighting In Business & Jealous Mentor

00:00:00.000 what is up guys it's andy purcellan this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies

00:00:21.060 the thickness and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today

00:00:25.640 we have q and af that's where you submit the questions and we give you the answers now you

00:00:31.760 could submit your questions a few different ways the first way is guys you can email these

00:00:37.020 questions in to ask andy at andy for seller.com or you go on youtube drop your question the comments

00:00:42.860 on the q and af episodes we'll pick some from there as well questions can be about anything

00:00:48.180 all right personal development entrepreneurship business success how to win you can also ask

00:00:54.560 about what's going on in the world we'll do a little bit of all that uh but primarily we like

00:00:58.900 to keep it on how to win and how to be better and how to kick ass as that is a key part of american

00:01:05.280 culture and uh human culture that we need to get back on top of so i'm going to share my 25 almost

00:01:12.060 26 years of experience with you during these q and af episodes and help you get to a place that you want

00:01:17.740 to be as well now if you're new to the show we have shows within the show it's not always q and af we have

00:01:24.560 cruise the internet and that is uh where we put topics up on the screen we speculate on what's

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00:01:39.780 real talk real talk is just 5 to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk uh usually that's just

00:01:45.220 some things i think you need to hear about success sometimes it's about what's going on in the world

00:01:49.220 and then other times we have 75 hard verses 75 hard verses is where people come on who have used

00:01:56.200 the 75 hard program to recalibrate their life um they talk about how they were before how they were

00:02:03.400 after and how you can use the 75 hard program to recalibrate your mindset and get your life back

00:02:09.080 as well now if you're unfamiliar with 75 hard it is the initial phase of the live hard program the

00:02:15.260 live hard program is the world's most popular mental transformation program ever and you can

00:02:20.960 get it for free at episode 208 on the audio feed again that's 208 on the audio feed the entire program

00:02:28.200 is available there for free there is also a book at andy frisella.com called the book on mental

00:02:34.320 toughness which has the entire live hard program plus a whole bunch of chapters on mental toughness

00:02:39.400 a bunch of case studies on mental toughness why it's important how to utilize it in your life

00:02:44.920 and uh how to change everything using the aspects of mental toughness okay again that's at andy

00:02:51.200 frisella.com now we do things a little bit different in this show uh we don't run ads on the show probably

00:02:57.440 the biggest show in the world that doesn't run ads and we make a trade with you the trade is very

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00:03:16.700 don't get your help to grow the show the show doesn't grow all right so if the show makes you

00:03:21.400 think if it makes you laugh it gives you a new perspective it's something that you think other

00:03:25.140 people need to hear do us a solid and share the show all right we have a little saying around here

00:03:29.520 it goes like this don't be a hoe share the show all right what's up dude hi how's it going good

00:03:35.020 yeah good what's going on with you oh not much i'm uh looking forward to your costume change

00:03:40.080 my costume change yeah since you brought it up what are you talking about your workout oh yeah

00:03:44.940 i'm gonna wear uh dean stotts here today he brought our kilts and i am 100 going to wear the kilt during

00:03:52.760 my workout as soon as i get out of this podcast yeah 100 i hope you change into it oh yeah is that

00:03:59.480 you've been looking forward to that for a long time i've been i mean listen there's only a few things

00:04:03.040 that still excite me in this world yeah helping others around man yeah change into a kilt i was

00:04:09.300 gonna say i mean wieners yeah uh yeah and while i'm at it um guys you guys are always asking how

00:04:16.260 to support very simply go to your store ask for one of these first form energy drinks buy a couple of

00:04:22.280 them if they don't have them tell them they need to have them and uh tag us when you go in and get

00:04:27.160 those you can pick up uh all the amazing flavors i like orange dj likes grape right i like grape too

00:04:36.240 so tag us don't be a difficult uh person yes indeed

00:04:43.020 anyway yeah man it's monday it is what's happening let's make some people better let's do it

00:04:51.700 uh guys i got three good ones shocking i got three good ones for you yeah so let's knock these

00:04:59.260 out guys any question number one what's up andy what's up uh andy for a long time i have been

00:05:07.080 wondering what is going on with the finances inside our business that i started that i helped start

00:05:13.900 i was starting to wonder if the owner was making uh taking some of the money out that he claimed to

00:05:21.200 not be making because the finances just don't add up but i think there may be something else going on

00:05:27.640 this company is still a very small business done around two million dollars in sales but there is

00:05:32.860 something that isn't adding up it looks like there is a possibility that several hundred thousand

00:05:40.580 dollars has somehow been lost mistracked or stolen from us have you ever dealt with embezzlement

00:05:47.040 inside your companies and if so how would you suggest we handle the situation just to be clear we are

00:05:53.100 still investigating the situation and don't know for sure that it is theft yet but if it is the case

00:05:58.780 we want we would want to catch them and hold them accountable and get the money back wondering if you

00:06:03.460 have any ideas on this as an older guy with more business experience yeah for sure there's lots of

00:06:08.680 things you can do um one of the main things that you do they teach in basic accounting class in terms

00:06:14.100 of controls which is to uh force people to take vacation so that you can operate their role when

00:06:21.680 they're not there to see what's actually going on um forcing people to take mandatory breaks away from

00:06:26.820 the company especially in the finance the people who handle the finances uh is a smart move um other

00:06:34.440 things that you can do is you can handle uh and hire outside auditing companies to come in and dig into

00:06:41.220 your company and figure out what's going on i mean with two million dollars of sales you're probably

00:06:46.040 running uh slightly uncomplicated business and i know that means you know to you it's complicated but

00:06:52.920 it should what i mean by that is it shouldn't be hard for a trained professional to dig into what

00:06:57.160 you're doing and figure out what's actually going on uh and whether you know it's coming from

00:07:02.440 the owner or whether it's coming from uh you know an employee or whether it's coming from things like

00:07:09.760 you know dude sometimes and this has happened this happens to lots of companies you know uh companies get

00:07:16.060 used to paying invoices and companies that are sending the invoices know that they automatically pay

00:07:21.480 them so what they'll do is they'll slide in extra invoices uh assuming that they're going to get paid no

00:07:27.200 matter what that happens all the time and it does oh yeah if you don't if you do not keep an eye on

00:07:34.000 the detailed financial health of your company you are a failure of an operator all right and i have

00:07:43.360 failed operations because i've done that at times during my career where i haven't known the numbers

00:07:49.760 or it's grown too fast or there have been things that have happened and look dude every single one of

00:07:55.060 those times where i took my eye off the ball something happened where money went from us to

00:08:00.580 someone who shouldn't have had it lots of different ways uh sometimes it was an employee sometimes it was

00:08:06.000 business sometimes it was uh taxes that weren't paid there's all these things that have to be managed

00:08:12.940 and you have to stay on top of them all the time to make sure that the money gets where it's supposed to

00:08:16.960 go and so uh there's lots of ways to do this uh yes i've dealt with this and yes any business that is

00:08:24.060 you know have grown from zero to seven eight nine figures has dealt with these situations before

00:08:30.740 and there's lots of ways to solve them but the best way to solve it is to dig in if you don't know how

00:08:36.640 to dig in hire a company that can dig in that's from the outside that's a professional it's going to

00:08:41.280 cost you a little bit of money they're going to come in they're going to find out what the fuck is

00:08:44.680 going on and then create systems that make sure that that doesn't happen again right and if it is a

00:08:51.040 company that's you know uh over invoicing you you know they could do this a number of different ways

00:08:56.720 i don't think people realize this they can charge you more on the invoices which happens all the

00:09:01.120 time if you don't if you don't keep an eye on your pricing from your vendors they're going to

00:09:06.580 fucking raise the prices without telling you this is a common business practice amongst most shitbag

00:09:11.340 companies and then if they're really unethical what they'll do is they'll start sending extra invoices

00:09:17.360 like i said that need to get paid because they figure that the accounting partner will just pay

00:09:22.020 them and that happens all the time too so you have to know where this money is going how it's getting

00:09:27.920 you know quote unquote stolen from you um and hiring an outside firm to do that is usually the best way

00:09:35.600 to do that because they're unfamiliar with their business and it's like a child asking for the first

00:09:39.640 time and they'll find out everything you need to know and on top of that they will point out a lot

00:09:44.540 of areas where you need controls and you need systems and you need uh new ways of doing things

00:09:49.260 that will prevent this from happening so having an outside audit company come in and voluntarily audit

00:09:54.400 your your shit um is a great idea we've done that a number of times um you know at your level you might

00:10:02.880 be able to get you know a one person to come in and do that you know at our level it's a fucking

00:10:07.200 major expense a huge fucking pain in the ass operation yeah but uh the important thing is is

00:10:14.000 to know is yes this happens to every business at some point in time um fingers get sticky when money

00:10:19.980 starts coming in um people do make mistakes sometimes uh these situations where money is missing is a

00:10:29.520 mistake sometimes it's a miscalculation but you know usually it's not usually it's someone who's doing

00:10:34.600 something unethical somewhere along the line and if it happens to be your owner who's taking the money

00:10:39.260 it's his right to take the money but if he's putting the company in a bad position that's that's a bad

00:10:44.080 thing too for you for you right um and sometimes they make mistakes sometimes owners make mistakes

00:10:49.240 sometimes you know uh the information that they're fed from someone in their system who might be not on

00:10:56.580 top of it or who might be unethical and they make decisions on that so i've seen all this all these

00:11:01.300 things and you're going to see all these things too no matter no matter what you're not really going

00:11:06.000 to be able to prevent it other than doing what i'm saying which is getting on top of it early

00:11:10.160 making sure there's no holes in the bucket creating systems that prevent that money from

00:11:14.700 you know magically disappearing and moving forward and that's going to take the buy-in from your owner

00:11:20.500 by the way right right well i was going to ask you on that point too because like you know the other

00:11:25.620 thing too it's like you know sometimes it doesn't even have to necessarily be physical dollars

00:11:29.760 right it could be product it could be fucking time like employee time well you know like there's

00:11:35.400 plenty of ways that that shit could happen let me tell you a story one hot listen i have caught over

00:11:41.900 the course of 25 years i have caught people stealing every motherfucking way that you can catch someone

00:11:47.800 stealing i caught someone stealing one time who was where our plant is where we make our products

00:11:56.020 was taking product off the line selling it out of the back of his car at the gyms no shit yeah so

00:12:01.760 it wasn't even making it to us and he was actually stealing from the manufacturing side and then selling

00:12:07.320 it out the trunk of his car okay so like dude there's no limit to what people will do to make a few extra

00:12:13.360 dollars if you're not on top of the fucking controls and dude i i would make your controls as if

00:12:19.880 you don't trust anyone i would make them so lock tight it doesn't matter if it's your mom it doesn't

00:12:26.020 brother it doesn't matter if it's your dad doesn't fucking matter nobody has the ability to fuck the

00:12:30.920 system and that's required for a healthy company and where it's really required is that when you go

00:12:36.740 out to market at some point you're going to want to build a you're going to want to get money or you're

00:12:42.300 going to want to create a strategic partnership or you're going to want to exit and your books and

00:12:47.800 your ability to show that you have the proper controls in place and the proper books in place

00:12:52.540 are really how your business is valued okay yeah it's valued on what it sells but you could sell

00:12:58.840 a good trillion dollars worth of shit if you don't have the proper controls and the proper books

00:13:03.220 they're not even going to fucking look at you so it's important to have that up front it's also

00:13:08.140 important to consider when you suspect someone is stealing you have to look into their their uh you

00:13:15.480 know mindset right there's usually a few key things that someone who steals from you uh what they have

00:13:24.520 in in common okay and i'll go through a couple of them one uh alcohol and drug use okay if they're

00:13:30.940 alcohol struggling with alcohol and drugs and you suspect them stealing there's a good chance they're

00:13:34.920 fucking stealing at home problems okay if they have major problems at home they're going through a

00:13:40.040 divorce they're going through some sort of shit at home that's a red flag all right if they if you

00:13:46.420 suspect them of stealing perceived injustice all right meaning that they believe and they have

00:13:52.540 expressed that they deserve to be in a different position or that you don't deserve to make the money

00:13:58.020 that you're making okay if they've expressed that fucking fire them immediately because they will

00:14:03.220 eventually steal all right those are three things yeah those are three things that you have to look out for

00:14:08.340 all the time now i'm not saying that you know people who have problems at home you just want to fire

00:14:15.600 them that's not what i'm saying right i'm not saying that everyone who has problems at home or everyone

00:14:19.740 who smokes a little weed or drinks a little drink is stealing what i'm saying is if you suspect them of

00:14:25.420 stealing and you find one or more of those things involved they probably are okay so um yeah i mean

00:14:35.460 that's a that's real shit oh yeah bro those are shit those are real things that you have to look

00:14:39.100 out for okay uh you know their past doesn't always equal their present right people do weird things for

00:14:46.560 money bro i've seen people i've had people in my life not for me but i've known people in my life

00:14:54.900 who i i i knew i knew them you know some of them too from being around me who have turned out to be

00:15:01.940 complete fucking thieves complete fucking frauds okay money does weird shit to people

00:15:08.900 and uh when i do business this is why i don't really fuck with anybody this is why i stay at home

00:15:14.700 you guys are like why aren't you out doing this and this is because dude i've been fucked by so many

00:15:18.900 people that i don't care to be around anybody and like i don't need any new friends my friend roster

00:15:23.960 is full and it's high quality so unless you're higher quality which is unlikely because the circle i

00:15:29.980 run at is a pretty high circle uh you're not going to get on the roster dude so i don't need new

00:15:34.440 friends i don't need new business deals i don't need your services everything that i do i've already

00:15:39.860 figured out the best way to do it you know what i'm saying like it's i don't fuck with people dude

00:15:44.920 because i've seen too many people from the outside you know uh her mosey talks to me about we talk about

00:15:49.500 this all the time no new friends like bro we don't we don't make new friends because we got

00:15:54.520 everything in line we have the people we want and almost every single person that comes in our lives

00:15:58.960 at this level wants something from us and it's usually money yeah let me let me let me actually

00:16:03.700 on this last piece on this this too because i feel like you know especially like for those newer

00:16:07.680 younger in the game entrepreneurs um you know specifically the bleeding heart ones right that

00:16:13.580 like you know oh everybody's good there's good intentions for everybody i think a lot of this show

00:16:18.160 is about addressing the expectations that people have and like how that's not real and so is it safe

00:16:24.800 to say that as an entrepreneur you should have the expectation that somebody at some point is going

00:16:31.980 to steal and handling that situation is more looking at it as more of an investment almost it's just a

00:16:37.560 reality yeah like it's just part of the cost of doing business it's gonna happen yes 100 all the bad

00:16:43.780 things that you think are gonna happen people laughing at you people stealing from you people messing with

00:16:48.700 you people hating on you they're all gonna happen dude but if you stick it out and you keep going

00:16:53.880 and you keep building and you show up every day and you give it your best it's still worth it i mean

00:16:58.720 that's what you got to understand so a lot of people won't go because they're so afraid of all

00:17:02.720 these things that might happen when if you just realized yes they're going to happen but it's going

00:17:07.980 to be worth it anyway you would just go okay so like none of this shit that i've had to go through

00:17:13.940 and i've had to go through a lot bro like i don't remember any of that shit i don't fucking care yeah

00:17:19.160 in the moment it's hard but my life as the result of me waking up every day and continuing to go

00:17:25.980 is awesome so when i get frustrated and i look at like the amount of stress and pain and betrayal

00:17:32.820 and frustration that i've had to deal with as an individual if i stop myself and i say okay this sucks

00:17:39.680 but it's pretty awesome here then you understand you're paying a more of a price than the average

00:17:48.220 person would pay in terms of you know how people actually treat you and you have to be careful man

00:17:53.540 because it can make you super bitter dude there's times where i get real bitter about people in general

00:17:58.440 but how i fix that is i come here and i hang out with you guys and all these wonderful people that i get

00:18:04.460 to be around every day and it restores my hope and faith and trust that humans are generally good

00:18:11.080 right and that's the truth they are um and one thing you got to remember dude like you said the

00:18:16.820 bleeding heart thing uh like this has never happened nobody's ever gonna listen here's the other thing

00:18:21.900 that happens okay the other thing that happens is you get like a guilty conscious okay especially when

00:18:27.180 you start making money and people will nickel and dime and do shit and you like give them a break

00:18:32.940 because like you're living life right and you know that they're listen you have to handle those people

00:18:38.640 the same way you would handle someone that stole fucking 20 million dollars from you because if you

00:18:43.500 don't they will all right and that's what you have to understand these people who take a little here and

00:18:50.500 do a little there and do an inch becomes a foot becomes a meter becomes a fucking mile becomes a thousand

00:18:57.420 miles and then when you stand up for yourself at a hundred miles they you're they're the victim right

00:19:03.180 you see what i'm saying right so like dude you cannot allow your personality you cannot expect

00:19:10.440 the same thing from other people that you have and give to other people you're just not going to get it

00:19:15.900 and if you go around thinking that everybody's your friend and everybody has your best interests in

00:19:20.520 mind that shit will get you killed it will get you fucking killed young dolf has a verse in one of his

00:19:25.960 songs to be careful who you call your friend that turn on you that's the fucking truth that is the

00:19:31.840 truth not everybody's your friend not everybody's your brother not everybody's on the team and the

00:19:37.280 ones you know that are on the team they will show you what their actions and the ones that you know

00:19:41.280 aren't on the team will also show you what their actions you cannot give grace to people who do

00:19:46.900 unethical things like stealing that that is a that is a character flaw that will follow them

00:19:52.560 from here to there to there no one who steals goes through life and stops stealing it doesn't happen

00:19:58.400 okay that that is one character flaw you cannot fucking overlook cannot if they steal a fucking

00:20:04.700 dollar fucking get rid of them if they steal a quarter get rid of them it's a fucking fundamental

00:20:10.620 character flaw that you cannot correct i would fucking love it man that's some real shit man yeah i love

00:20:15.340 it uh guys andy question number two uh my question is how do you deal with people who tell you they

00:20:23.320 will do something and ultimately don't i hired a sales rep about eight months ago for my brand

00:20:28.900 um and have sunk some money into this guy about 10k uh and i've not seen any return on investment my

00:20:35.040 business coach and i think that he's just gaslighting me and promising orders down the line but in this

00:20:40.100 industry men's apparel i wouldn't have i would have expected something by now it almost feels

00:20:46.280 intentional that he hasn't done anything yet it seems like there's too many old assholes in the

00:20:51.580 business world and they're taking advantage of a 28 year old guy me trying to get his honest business

00:20:57.440 off the ground it feels demoralizing how have you handled sales reps or or people in general telling

00:21:03.740 you they'll do something but they don't follow through on it how do you handle that uh i get rid of them

00:21:09.320 by what the fuck you mean how i handle it like you gonna we make a deal you shake a hand you say

00:21:14.120 this is what i'm gonna do i put out a little piece of paper it says these are your responsibilities

00:21:17.840 and you don't do them what the fuck you see you okay that's that's how you do it business but yes

00:21:24.620 it's business like dude what the fuck do you guys think like and by the way who the fuck is your

00:21:29.260 business coach allowing you to fucking hire some old retread salesperson okay you are far better off

00:21:35.480 unless that person comes from like you know a top level c-suite position at a major company that you

00:21:42.760 want to be at which by the way you wouldn't be able to afford that person anyway but unless that's there

00:21:47.960 that's the person you're hiring who can pick up the motherfucking phone and bring you this business and

00:21:53.720 that business and this business that is the value of an experienced sales rep it is not their ability

00:21:59.620 to sell it is the relationships that they have procured okay so if you're looking for someone

00:22:05.340 to go out and sell and they don't have relationships to sell your shit to then you shouldn't fucking hire

00:22:12.480 them you should train them all right so instead of hiring some old dude who we call a retread we don't

00:22:19.760 hire retreads here okay if they've been at some other company and done some other shit i don't hire

00:22:24.520 them you know why because they bring their fucking weak ass culture and their bad habits into my shit

00:22:30.100 and fuck it up so you know what i do i take people who are young and i say hey let me teach you how to

00:22:36.680 sell and i start teaching them how to sell and that person who is young and hungry and wants to learn how

00:22:43.040 to sell will sell 10 times more than the guy who you've hired who wants to come in get his paycheck

00:22:48.260 pretend like he's doing shit and not really do shit okay even if that young person lacks the

00:22:57.140 credentials and the experience as long as you can paint the vision give them the plan show them how

00:23:03.540 to do it and they're hungry enough they will outperform that old guy now that old guy will outperform the

00:23:09.600 young guy every time if he's one of the guys that i explained to you when you get to a certain place

00:23:14.500 in business you're going to need to hire people who already have the relationships in place that's

00:23:20.420 what you're paying for that's why those people cost so much money it's not because they can sell so much

00:23:25.240 shit it's because they can pick up a phone and call their friend who they've been in their wedding

00:23:29.840 and say hey pick this shit up or sell this shit or buy this and they will okay so that's what you're

00:23:36.200 paying for at that level that's why those guys cost a lot of money you're not in that position yet and i

00:23:41.260 can tell by you paying that guy ten thousand because those motherfuckers make a lot more than

00:23:44.880 that all right so what you've done is you've hired a retread lazy salesperson who thinks you're some

00:23:51.380 young fucking punk kid that's why you feel the way that you feel because your feelings right by the way

00:23:56.260 that intuition that that offensiveness that bitterness that you're feeling you that's justified

00:24:01.920 because that's what he's doing you've hired this old guy who's not hungry he doesn't give two fucks

00:24:06.880 about your company who doesn't care about growing he cares about getting a check in between okay when

00:24:12.600 you should have been training a young guy taking that money and investing in them and letting them

00:24:17.780 go out and be hungry and procure your new business okay that's how you should be looking at it there

00:24:24.180 are very few retread salespeople that are great there's very few okay when you hire someone from the

00:24:32.300 outside who claims to have this skill and this skill and this skill and this skill you better make

00:24:36.960 sure they have those skills because there's a likelihood that they're lying and there's a

00:24:41.560 likelihood that they're exaggerating and there's a likelihood that they are going to bring bad habits

00:24:46.220 and bad culture because here's the other thing to consider you're bringing in this sales professional

00:24:52.460 in front of the rest of your staff okay now if i go hire a sales professional who's 40 years old

00:24:59.820 and the rest of the staff is 25 and it's been a guys guess what we just hired this awesome sales guy

00:25:06.380 he's coming in his name is steve he's 40 he's done this and this and this and this and this

00:25:10.360 that guy you've already built that guy up to your younger people okay so now you bring this guy in

00:25:15.600 and he fucking coasts what does that tell the rest of your people you see what i'm saying so it becomes a

00:25:22.160 big culture disruptor and and demoralizer to everybody else and makes your job ultimately harder by the

00:25:29.160 way your business coach should know this and if your business coach doesn't know this you should

00:25:32.860 fucking fire him and join rta syndicate because this is the shit we talk about okay so just keeping

00:25:38.420 it real none of these motherfuckers out here that are business coaches could tell you any of the shit

00:25:44.340 that i'm telling you because they haven't done it yeah they might be able to hypothetically draw some

00:25:49.380 sort of shit on a screen and it might make sense to you but the reality is unless they've done it for

00:25:55.200 25 years and built multiple fucking seven eight nine figure companies that are worth 10 figures

00:26:01.700 i wouldn't fucking hire that motherfucker because there's people that have that are teaching business

00:26:06.820 okay and your business coach should know better if your business coach isn't already telling you

00:26:11.660 what i just told you you should fucking get rid of yeah i don't care who the fuck it is to that point

00:26:15.340 you said yeah it probably makes sense to you but like fuck if you don't know anything everything

00:26:18.840 makes sense to you that's right that makes sense that's what i'm saying that is the whole thing

00:26:22.680 we have this culture of business coaches who don't know business who don't have experience

00:26:27.280 who don't really know shit making courses making this and that's how they make their money i didn't

00:26:33.200 make my money that way i made my money fucking doing real business okay and i've been doing it for

00:26:37.860 almost 26 years now i know i look like a young hunky motherfucker but here's the reality and that's

00:26:43.780 not honky either all right hunky and honky you both all right yeah honky honky chonky that's right

00:26:49.180 so i'm a honky honky all right but here's the deal okay if you fucking there is a huge massive

00:27:00.600 fucking divide between hypothetically talking about things and actually having experience

00:27:06.660 that last question not a single one of these motherfuckers could answer because they haven't

00:27:11.540 built a real business okay so stop paying people who haven't done what it is you want to do to teach

00:27:17.720 you how to do what it is you want to do it's really fucking simple i'm not going to hire a fucking

00:27:24.020 skateboard coach to teach me how to play fucking football okay i'm not gonna do that i'm not gonna

00:27:30.340 hire someone uh to cut my hair who's never cut fucking hair and instead you know they build chopstick

00:27:37.800 houses like what the fuck are you guys doing like the fact that some people are so stupid to pay these

00:27:45.520 people who have never done what it is they want to do means that you're probably not smart enough to

00:27:50.760 make it in business anyway okay because that should be common sense now if that applies to you i'm sorry

00:27:56.040 to hurt your feelings but the reality is it'll save you some money unless you can look and say they did

00:28:01.220 this they did that they did this they did that this is where they do it this is their employees here's

00:28:07.060 their customers here's what it's like to do business with them you should not be fucking listening to

00:28:12.040 them period how the fuck has this become this thing like how has it become this thing how are

00:28:18.380 these fucking people out here who have never built a fucking thing selling courses what the fuck is

00:28:25.080 going on in the world yeah you wonder why you're getting your ass kicked because you're listening to

00:28:28.980 someone who's never been where it is you want to go if you want to drive to california are you going

00:28:34.660 to listen to someone who's driven to california are you going to listen to someone who's never driven

00:28:38.960 but just studied it on the internet and regurgitated some shit you see what i'm saying

00:28:42.940 like bro it's it's common sense to me because i've done it i've done it what these motherfuckers

00:28:49.440 pretend to be i am okay i've done it so how can you fucking learn from someone who hasn't fucking

00:28:57.480 gone down the path you are it's they're probably charging a fuck ton of money too rta syndicates a few

00:29:03.080 hundred dollars you get what i'm saying yeah it makes no sense man like fuck dude well i mean that's the

00:29:08.260 thing when you don't know nothing and i love cars bro but just because some motherfucker has a cool

00:29:12.160 car doesn't mean shit what's his business look like where is it what products they sell where

00:29:17.000 their employees what's their reputation what's it like to do business with them can i order their

00:29:21.160 products where are these magical companies that they say they own where are these things that they

00:29:25.160 said they built can i see it can i go to it can i touch it can i feel it can i talk to people who go

00:29:29.440 there if not don't hire them yeah let me ask you this because it kind of goes into that too

00:29:34.480 because i mean i feel like obviously too that it's a lot more of a younger generation who falls

00:29:39.760 for that stuff yeah because they because they don't want to listen to people who really built

00:29:43.880 shit because they say something they don't like and something goes like this it's hard as fuck it

00:29:48.320 takes all your effort it takes all your energy it's going to cost you half your friends probably all of

00:29:53.000 them it's going to cost you relationships it's going to make you miserable it's going to fucking be

00:29:56.940 the bane of your existence for a long fucking time and then you're probably going to get rich

00:30:01.020 that's what it sounds like and it's going to take a long time that they don't like that message and

00:30:06.380 no one can sell that message but the faster that people accept that message bro the faster they get

00:30:11.680 where they want to go and that's just the truth and most people spend all their fucking lives going

00:30:16.680 to gimmick to gimmick to gimmick to gimmick to gimmick a get rich gimmick get rich gimmick get rich gimmick

00:30:22.160 and then when they're fucking 35 they figure out oh that guy that guy andy he wasn't lying

00:30:27.920 you know like i mean you wasted fucking 15 years the path do you fuckers really think

00:30:35.200 that everybody out here who's made some money made it quick or easy or fast

00:30:41.640 if you think that bro you're playing the wrong game it's a lifetime commitment dude i want to i want

00:30:49.800 to ask you this because you know just for reference so so the younger entrepreneurs understand this too

00:30:54.780 man when when you started in your journey in the early years bro you were 19 starting off yeah how

00:31:00.600 much faith did you put in other people just just like just just on the on the on the face of

00:31:07.140 everything you know i'm saying new business no like vendors come to you new business relationships like

00:31:11.020 how much faith did you put in them versus the amount of faith that you just put in the work yourself

00:31:15.540 well in the beginning i put a lot more faith in other people because i believe just like these young

00:31:22.400 kids believe like i just said that other people that were older than me had the answer you know but

00:31:28.060 what i figured out is that these older people didn't have the answer not only did not have the

00:31:31.460 answer they were willing to prey on me to get a few extra dollars because i was stupid and that's

00:31:36.180 what's happening to a lot of the people that i'm referring to in this business coaching space

00:31:41.220 okay y'all are fucking learning from the wrong people you're learning from this is why i quit fucking

00:31:46.140 college this is why i quit college because i was smart enough to recognize that i did my business

00:31:51.500 major in college was entrepreneurship and finance i owned a business when i was in college i owned our

00:31:58.500 first store i started when i was 19 so i'm going to business school as i'm running a business and i

00:32:04.200 remember the day i fucking quit i'll tell you exactly what happened i'm in the class i'm in business

00:32:09.840 class which was rare because i never went to class this day this day confirmed to me why i didn't go

00:32:15.600 to class uh this professor was up in front and he was we were in a business law class or something i

00:32:21.260 forgot what we were no we were in a marketing class and this guy starts talking about you know

00:32:25.920 some shit that i had just went through in business i can't remember dude it was 20 fucking six years

00:32:30.720 ago but he said something and i raised my hand and i said but what about this and this and this

00:32:35.920 and these are things that i had just you just went through this yes in my business yeah and he said

00:32:42.400 well that's blah blah blah and he basically said well that's that's bullshit and then i asked i said well

00:32:48.000 how many businesses have you owned and he said i'm a professor i'm not an actual business owner

00:32:53.060 so then when we got out of class i fucking followed him okay because this is how fucking petty i am

00:33:00.960 i followed him to the fucking parking garage because i want to see what the fuck he drove

00:33:05.460 because i'm a car guy right and i dude i do judge people by what they fucking drive okay uh most people

00:33:11.380 do by the way just so you know you can say whatever you want it's basic transportation blah blah blah

00:33:16.660 you pull up in a bad motherfucker people look at you different that's just reality we'll treat you

00:33:20.500 different okay you pull up in nice clothes they treat you different it's it's reality you get

00:33:25.740 there with in shape and you're fucking jacked up you fucking look good they treat you different

00:33:30.180 all you motherfuckers that say all this shit like oh it doesn't matter it's all the matters is in

00:33:35.240 your inside that's not true just not now they might charge you more well that's a different story i'm

00:33:41.960 just telling you dude like your perception you're the way you present yourself matters a lot okay

00:33:50.760 and so i followed him to the car garage bro and he drove away in this like dirty rust bucket piece

00:33:56.460 of shit and i fucking never went back to school i quit i never went back ever and then that's what

00:34:02.560 made you put the more more faith in yourself and i'll just figure out the fucking lessons and learn

00:34:06.420 them yeah because i realized that all these people that were teaching me shit didn't know shit so i'm

00:34:10.340 like fuck i'm all right i'm gonna go learn from people that know and from that point forward i read

00:34:14.780 books of people like dave thomas people like sam walton people who had done real shit now remember

00:34:20.240 at that time we didn't have the internet there was no people out here putting out courses on how to run

00:34:24.320 a business it wasn't happening okay but the people were people that ran businesses were doing books and

00:34:30.980 the reason their books sold is because everybody knew what businesses they ran now we have this situation

00:34:36.180 where none of these fucks have done shit remember their books wouldn't sell unless people knew who

00:34:42.160 they were from the businesses that they ran but now it's not that way now it's everybody can make

00:34:47.240 a course everybody can charge for a course but nobody has the proof of rolling out their dick and

00:34:53.880 saying this is what i built none of them okay so i don't like if you can't understand that most of

00:35:00.100 these people are taking advantage of your misunderstanding of what the game is about

00:35:04.880 meaning you don't want to hear that it's going to be hard you don't want to hear that it's going

00:35:09.580 to take time so you listen to the people who tell you the opposite of that and then you don't go

00:35:14.820 anywhere and then you do that again and you don't go anywhere and before you know it you've wasted a

00:35:18.640 decade looking for the fucking thing that doesn't exist which is fast easy quick doesn't exist just

00:35:24.460 doesn't so uh so yeah man i read books i talked to people who own businesses i got on airplanes and

00:35:32.200 went and met with people who own bigger businesses of mine that uh were in the same space i did

00:35:37.200 everything i could to learn from people who were actually doing and that's where i learned a lot of

00:35:40.900 what i do and then the rest of it is through trial and error you know like i say dude you you can

00:35:46.580 know nothing and still succeed in business as long as you're gritty enough to not quit and as long as

00:35:51.820 you're intelligent enough to learn the lesson when you make the mistake if you can learn a lesson when

00:35:57.320 you make the mistake and not make the mistake twice and you're gritty enough to not quit you

00:36:01.020 have what it takes to succeed but it's going to take time and it's going to be hard and you're not

00:36:06.260 going to live the same life as all of your friends and all of your family and they're not going to

00:36:10.380 understand it and they're going to criticize you and they're going to laugh at you and they're going

00:36:13.800 to make jokes about it because that's not the path that they are on they're going to talk to you

00:36:18.660 about things like balance balance is different for entrepreneurs than it is for everybody else

00:36:23.460 okay so it's very difficult in the beginning for a young person to go down the path because once

00:36:30.860 they step into that path they meet resistance from literally everywhere they go they're meeting

00:36:36.000 resistance from their friends their family uh they're getting made fun of on the internet

00:36:40.180 they're they're being asked like are you sure are you sure and they're being told don't forget where

00:36:45.720 you came from man don't forget to be humble you know you're getting a little too materialistic

00:36:49.760 you know you're getting a little greedy there like we get all these resistance points and then on top

00:36:55.220 of it we get people who are older than us trying to take advantage of us like we're talking about here

00:36:59.740 where they're showing up and they're giving half-ass effort and they're charging you a lot of money

00:37:03.780 because you don't know any better all right so entrepreneurship is an extremely difficult path to take in life

00:37:13.040 it is i believe it's the hardest path of any profession that exists and the statistics show that

00:37:19.480 all right you have to build yourself into someone who can tolerate it or it's not going to be for you

00:37:26.540 and we have a big problem on the internet right now of a lot of people marketing entrepreneurship

00:37:32.340 as if it's like some fucking easy free worry-free existence where you just you know

00:37:38.500 fucking get money show up in your mailbox you know what i mean it's not what happens dude it's

00:37:44.640 not the reality it is you have to be tough you have to be gritty you have and if you're not you

00:37:49.100 got to build it uh and you got to be smart on who you take your information from i love it man i love

00:37:55.040 it guys andy uh let's get to our third and final question question number three hey andy i've been a i'm a

00:38:03.320 huge fan of the show i've been with my company for three and a half years and i have worked my ass off

00:38:09.680 to double my salary and gain two promotions this last promotion i received put me at the same level

00:38:16.960 as my mentor and made me the youngest person uh in the level or a role ever i expected to be

00:38:24.500 congratulated by my said mentor who is twice my age for all my hard work although i expected

00:38:30.180 that it was not uh what i actually received um my mentor did not congratulate me at all

00:38:37.440 instead he told me i would fail at my new position uh for failure to produce results even though i have

00:38:43.980 done his job for him over a year and gotten him great notice for my efforts and never asked him for

00:38:49.980 a single thing in return i was then told that it was my ship now and not to fuck it up or i would be

00:38:55.540 out the door now the office seems very tense and unwelcoming i am unsure how to handle this mentally

00:39:02.020 because he has taught me so much i just need to know if accepting this promotion was the right move

00:39:07.160 um i'm having a lot of internal struggles with this please lend me some advice would you rather be broke

00:39:13.280 would you rather be poor would you rather go backwards and pay because you make this fucking guy feel

00:39:19.480 weird welcome to the big fucking leagues bro when you're competing people don't like you they'll like

00:39:25.800 you up until you're doing as good as them and they don't like you anymore that's the reality of life

00:39:30.600 all right your neighbor your dad your fucking uh cousin your friends your mentor everyone everyone

00:39:39.480 treats you different when you're on the up when you pass them up all the bets are off bro okay so what

00:39:45.300 you are realizing is called reality and reality is this people will help you and they will when

00:39:53.160 you're the underdog they will help you they will root for you they will clap for you when you're on top

00:39:58.000 they automatically go to hate you okay that's why there's the saying you either die a hero or you live

00:40:04.860 long enough to become the villain okay because when you get tall enough and you get big enough the world

00:40:09.900 tries to hammer you to fuck down and you're learning this on a minimal scale right now you have a

00:40:14.960 person that you care about who you probably love a lot who you're probably very grateful for

00:40:19.040 who's taught you all this shit and now you're getting a different treatment because now you're

00:40:22.780 a threat to them all right my advice to you is to not give a fuck my advice to you is to realize that

00:40:28.940 you are a grown human being now and this is the way that it fucking is and this is why i try to tell

00:40:33.120 you guys over the last 10 years of doing podcasts life is a competition you cannot opt out of the

00:40:38.400 competition if you opt out of the competition your life is going to be very hard if you opt into the

00:40:43.360 competition your life is going to be very hard with a reward those are your options okay so you can't

00:40:50.560 help that someone's not secure enough to root for you so what can you control you can control you're

00:40:56.820 continuing down the path of becoming successful learning new skills doing exactly what you've done

00:41:03.720 with the exact same of work ethic that has gotten you to this point to go to the next level and

00:41:09.060 eventually you'll be that dude's boss and if he gives you the same fucking attitude when you're

00:41:13.300 his boss guess what you can do fire him okay so that's called reality of competition you're the

00:41:21.180 people to your left and your right you should want to help them if you do help them and they get better

00:41:26.820 than you you should look at them and say okay well then i need to do some of what they're doing and

00:41:31.220 get better as well but not everybody looks at it like that way that person who is your mentor does

00:41:36.600 not have a championship mentality because championship mentality goes like this i have

00:41:42.160 my friend over here to the right of me by the way this is all my friends all my friends i got my friend

00:41:48.020 over here to the left of me this guy over here to the right he starts doing way better than me i don't

00:41:54.140 fucking hate on that motherfucker i'm thankful he's doing better than me because it does a couple things

00:41:58.340 one it drives me because i'm competitive with him and even though he's my friend i still want to do

00:42:03.040 better okay two he's showing me the path of how to win bigger through his example i'm grateful for

00:42:10.420 that championship people they can be competitive without bitterness without hate and actually

00:42:16.880 replace those feelings with gratitude because it's actually teaching you how to be better there's a lot

00:42:23.140 of truth to the saying uh rising tide raises all ships most people just can't handle it because

00:42:29.020 their ego's too big when they're not the number one ship okay so you have to fucking be able to

00:42:34.860 be friends with people who you are grateful for when they win because it teaches you something and

00:42:41.180 it also grateful for because it drives you to do better that person does not have that quality and

00:42:47.020 because they do not have that quality they will never operate at the highest level every single

00:42:51.560 person i know that operates on a very high level and i'm talking nine figures and above okay i'm talking

00:42:57.980 who the fuck you want to be all right these people do not hate on their friends for doing better than

00:43:03.260 them they're excited when their friends do better than them they surround themselves with people do

00:43:07.860 better than them for the reasons that i just mentioned it motivates them it drives them they want to win

00:43:13.360 more but also they can learn from watching them win bigger and that is when you know you have an

00:43:18.520 amazing friend circle and by the way every single fucking champion that i've ever met and i've met a lot

00:43:24.640 i've interviewed a lot i've been around a lot my friends if i showed you my rolodex on my cell phone

00:43:30.380 you'd be like holy fuck everybody's like that and everybody below is like how you're describing

00:43:36.000 they get threatened they work on scarcity they're afraid that you know now this person's on uh my

00:43:42.380 level so they're gonna beat me you know they start doing toxic shit like trying to sink their shit or

00:43:47.280 take their credit or do fucked up shit don't fuck it up yeah bro that shit well that's a fair statement i mean

00:43:53.140 yeah don't fuck it up yeah but uh you know and by the way this is another lesson not everybody's

00:44:00.100 gonna cheer for you dude who fucking cares i was gonna ask you that yeah who does he really owe you

00:44:04.100 fucking is that why you did it yeah did you do it because people are gonna cheer for you because if

00:44:08.580 that's why you did it you're not going to be able to maintain success for very long because eventually

00:44:12.700 you become so successful people stop cheering and they don't like it and it starts rubbing them the

00:44:17.060 wrong way and you know that that happens to me all the time but you know what i don't think about

00:44:21.680 those people i think about the 20 year old andy or the 30 year old andy that needs to hear what i'm

00:44:27.200 saying so that they can push through and create greatness and create thousands of jobs like we've

00:44:31.260 done you see what i'm saying so you can't put stake in these people's uh inability to progress based

00:44:39.300 upon their own understanding of what competition is about bad competitors weak competitors losing

00:44:45.500 competitors they are negative towards people who are on the level or above champion competitors

00:44:54.480 they want to crush your fucking balls bro but they don't like go do it they want to win above board by

00:45:02.920 being better like i don't want to win by sabotaging someone i want to win by being better that's what

00:45:08.700 champions think and they are very grateful for anyone who can push them to a higher level

00:45:12.980 and not everybody's like that dude most people aren't that's why most people aren't champions

00:45:17.640 in their life they're not they're not the best at anything they're not high earners i mean look bro

00:45:22.200 most people don't make a million dollars or more in their life or a year you know or a day like that's

00:45:27.980 these are the anomalies like a lot of these people you look up at on the internet these you got to

00:45:33.200 realize this is a fucking tiny minority of humans that has a very specific behavior pattern that you're

00:45:40.240 trying to learn and adopt so that you can get to that level um it's not everybody you know winning

00:45:46.080 is special being great is special earning a lot of money building a big company that's very rare

00:45:50.760 and special it's very hard this is why i get upset when you guys listen to people who don't who

00:45:55.340 haven't done this shit because it's hard enough as it is without getting your mind filled with a

00:45:59.840 bunch of bullshit yeah you're going 10 years down the wrong fucking path it happens all the time

00:46:03.900 dude i fucking love it man yeah so so dude like you know the main thing here is you gotta

00:46:08.360 you know you have to understand that not everybody is on the same path as you and it is hard enough as

00:46:16.600 it is taking care of your own shit without you know having to pile on what so and so thinks or what

00:46:23.520 your mentor thinks or what this thinks bro listen man this is a reality of of of success if you have a

00:46:30.800 problem or it bothers you that people don't want to cheer for you or clap for you or tell you

00:46:34.420 congratulations you're not going to make it no one's telling jeff bezos congratulations no one's

00:46:40.200 telling emile musk congratulations they're those guys are expected to win and when they don't win

00:46:46.040 everybody jumps on them and fucking crushes them and that's how it is when you're a big enough winner

00:46:49.740 like when michael jordan misses a shot that's when they got him right like when when peyton manning

00:46:56.620 throws an interception on the game on the line that's where they hammer them they're expected

00:47:01.120 to make those wins they're expected to make those throws and those shots and that's the reality of

00:47:06.000 being great over the course of a long period of time nobody cheers for me bro but they fucking sure as

00:47:11.840 fuck hear from them when i fuck up you see what i'm saying that's reality and if you have a problem

00:47:16.500 with people being that way you're not going to do well i love it man i love it man guys andy that's a

00:47:21.920 hell of a way to start a monday man yeah guys let's go out there let's kick some ass let's have a good

00:47:26.140 week and we'll see you tomorrow uh with cti went from sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze

00:47:32.800 fuck a bowl fuck a stove counted millions in the cold bad bitch booted swole got her on bankroll

00:47:39.400 can't fold doesn't know headshot case closed

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - October 21, 2024

799. Q&AF： How To Handle Theft In Your Business, Gaslighting In Business & Jealous Mentor

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