REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 821. Q&AF： Battling With Success, Recognition Vs Work Load & Balancing Work With Social Life

00:00:00.000 What is up, guys? It's Andy Priscilla, and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye

00:00:20.400 to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society, and welcome to motherfucking

00:00:24.340 reality. Guys, today we have Q and AF. That's where you submit the questions and we give

00:00:29.180 you the answers. Now, you could submit your questions a few different ways. The first

00:00:32.800 way is, guys, email these questions into askandy at andyfriscilla.com. Or you go on YouTube

00:00:38.500 in the comments section on the Q and AF episodes, drop your question in the comments. We'll pick

00:00:42.640 some from there as well. Other times throughout the week, if you're a new listener, we have

00:00:46.840 shows within the show. We're going to have CTI, that stands for Cruise the Internet. That's

00:00:51.200 where we put topics of the day up here on the screen. We speculate on what's going on, what's

00:00:56.220 true, what's not true, and then we talk about how we, the people, have to solve these problems

00:00:59.980 going on in the world. Other times, we might have real talk. Real talk is just five to 20

00:01:04.080 minutes of me giving you some real talk, some shit that I think you need to hear. And then

00:01:08.800 we have 75 hard verses. 75 hard verses, and by the way, we have a great episode coming up

00:01:14.420 for that. 75 hard verses where people who come in the show, they talk about how they use 75

00:01:19.980 hard to reclaim their life, how their life was before, how their life is now, and how you

00:01:25.100 can use the program to do the same as them. If you're unfamiliar with 75 hard, it is the

00:01:29.360 initial phase of the live hard program, which is the world's most popular mental transformation

00:01:35.360 program in history. It's free. Okay. You can get it episode 208 on the audio feed. Again,

00:01:42.040 that's 208 audio feed only. There's also a book at andyfricella.com called the book on mental

00:01:47.420 toughness, which outlines the entire live hard program, plus a whole bunch of other stuff,

00:01:51.900 a bunch of chapters on mental toughness, why it's important, how to cultivate it, how to use it to

00:01:57.020 build your best life, a whole bunch of case studies on some very famous people who have used mental

00:02:01.700 toughness to become the very famous people that you recognize. Now, again, you can get that at

00:02:06.820 andyfricella.com, the book on mental toughness. Now, we do things a little different here. You're

00:02:10.860 going to notice that we don't run ads on the show. I think we're the biggest show in the world that

00:02:14.120 doesn't run ads. I'm pretty confident in that. The reason we don't run ads is because we talk about

00:02:18.840 the things that people don't want us talking about. All right. And I want to talk about those

00:02:24.040 things. I don't want to listen to somebody tell me what I can and can't say. All right. So we

00:02:27.900 finance the show ourselves. I don't fill your ears full of 20 minutes of bullshit ads. All right. We

00:02:34.060 just get right down to it. And I ask very simply that you do something for us. All right. Please

00:02:39.580 share the show. Help us grow the show. If you don't share the show, the show doesn't grow. It's that

00:02:45.280 simple. All right. So if the show makes you think, if it makes you laugh, if it gives you a new

00:02:49.140 perspective, if it's something that gives you value, it teaches you something, please do us

00:02:54.280 a solid and share the show. All right. Don't be a hoe. Share the show. All right. What's up?

00:02:59.360 What's going on, man? Oh, not much. What's up with you? Yeah, not much, man. You know, I was just

00:03:04.580 thinking, so 20, it's about to be 25 years in business for you, right? 26. Yeah. It's like

00:03:14.160 right around this time. Yeah. Yeah. Right around this time. Yeah. So 26 years ago, all right. Hot

00:03:20.820 little Andy. Yeah. Running around. You're like, I'm gonna start a business. Yeah. Like what, what,

00:03:25.880 what, what was the jump to like, all right, let's do this. Like what? Well, because I'm sure there was

00:03:30.420 times where it's like, okay, like we might've thought about it, but like, what made you actually

00:03:34.420 get serious? I'm like, all right, we're fucking doing this. Well, first of all, I never was what

00:03:42.000 you would consider a good student. Yeah. I wasn't dude. I did. I wasn't engaged in school. It wasn't

00:03:48.140 for me. The more challenging the class was, the better I did. Which was very weird because I went

00:03:55.800 through school pretty much being considered not very smart. And, uh, it wasn't that I wasn't very

00:04:02.480 smart. What I learned later was I was smarter than everybody else and the shit was boring and, um,

00:04:07.320 when being challenged. Yeah, at all. And every time I was challenged, I get an A, but in everybody,

00:04:11.520 every other class I get a D cause it was just so fucking boring. So I knew that like the traditional

00:04:18.340 life of go out, get a job, uh, you know, get the white picket fence, you know, get married,

00:04:25.380 have 2.5 kids like that. Traditional life has never really been an interest of mine,

00:04:31.100 you know? And that's a hard thing for people to understand because I feel like most people have

00:04:35.020 that dream. That wasn't ever my dream. My dream was I want to build something for myself. I want to

00:04:40.040 be an entrepreneur. Uh, and that was my main, you know, drive since I was a little kid. I mean,

00:04:45.400 when I was a little kid, dude, I was doing, uh, I was selling baseball cards on top of a fucking

00:04:49.920 igloo cooler. You know what I'm saying? Doing lemonade stands, snow cone stands, selling shit

00:04:54.600 door to door. I always had that entrepreneurial spirit. Um, and it, it's just something I always

00:05:00.720 had. And, um, when I got done with high school, I tried to go to college. Uh, I went to St. Louis

00:05:08.240 University here in St. Louis for a semester and it was horrible. I fucking hated it. And

00:05:15.220 I hated everything about it, dude. I hated, I hated, uh, having to go there. I didn't like

00:05:21.060 the way I felt when I walked in the building. I felt like I didn't belong there. It just

00:05:25.500 felt wrong. And, um, I did have one class that I liked, which was a, a, a higher level

00:05:32.000 political science class that I took that I did very well in, but that was the only class

00:05:36.620 that I enjoyed. And the rest of it just seemed like bullshit. You know, I'm in there learning

00:05:41.060 about things that, uh, you know, are very basic that I felt like I already knew and I

00:05:48.120 just didn't want to do it. And so Chris and I started talking about, you know, starting

00:05:52.100 a business together. And at first we were starting, uh, we wanted to start a tanning

00:05:57.000 salon and we didn't have the money to start a tanning salon. Cause one tanning bed was

00:06:02.020 like 40 grand. Okay. So like, we didn't have any money. We had $12,000 between the two

00:06:06.220 of us. And, uh, so we, we landed on a nutritional supplement store and that's, that was something

00:06:13.480 we had interest in. It was something that we were both, uh, you know, already learning

00:06:19.100 about and already using in our day-to-day lives. We both were athletes. We both love to train

00:06:24.860 and we came, we came up with supplement super stores and, and that's, that's where it started,

00:06:31.240 dude.

00:06:31.380 Well, I actually, because I mean, dude, 26 years, that's a quarter of a century. Like

00:06:35.320 that's a long fucking time. You know what I'm saying? I just think it's cool to like,

00:06:38.640 always like just look back every now and then it's like, what was the, like, what was there

00:06:42.160 a specific moment? I guess in that time where it's like, okay, shit's getting real. Like

00:06:46.020 we're actually doing this. Like what, what was that? What was that moment for you, for you

00:06:50.500 and Chris was like, all right, shit, we're actually doing this.

00:06:53.080 It wasn't there. I don't think it was like that. Like there wasn't there. Once we like said,

00:06:58.200 Hey, we're going to do this. We just did it. Just started. Yeah. It wasn't like a thing

00:07:01.220 where we overly questioned or we second guest or, you know, and I think that's a big problem

00:07:06.520 for most people. I think most people think themselves out of success. I think they think

00:07:10.920 themselves out of great relationships with people. I think they overanalyze everything

00:07:15.220 looking for the problems that are going to a court that they can't even, they can't even

00:07:20.820 fix until it shows up. And so they, they look down the lane and they're like, Oh, this could

00:07:26.480 happen. And this could happen. And this could happen. And this could happen. And this could

00:07:29.400 happen. And it paralyzes them into staying in the same spot they're in. And I see that

00:07:34.920 in business. I see that in life. I see that really everywhere. And that's why I say, you

00:07:40.020 know, the last few years of what we've been talking about on real AF, especially what's

00:07:44.520 been going on in the world. I started to come to a conclusion that the reason that most people

00:07:49.640 never build anything is because they lack the courage to go. They lack the courage to stand

00:07:53.540 out. They lack the courage to speak up. They lack the courage to go do something because

00:07:58.100 they're afraid of what might happen if they go. And the thing that they don't realize is, is that

00:08:02.520 no matter how good you plan, no matter how much you analyze, no matter how perfect the roadmap may

00:08:09.820 be to where you're trying to go, there's going to be obstacles and there's going to be things that

00:08:12.940 come up. And so the magic is in the commitment and then the commitment to solve these problems as

00:08:18.800 they come. And I think most people just don't get that. They want the perfect route. They want the

00:08:23.380 perfect plan. They want it to be guaranteed. And there is no guarantee on this. There's no

00:08:28.020 guarantee on business. There's no guarantee on life. There's no guarantee on friendships. There's

00:08:32.600 no guarantee on relationships. The only guarantee that you can make to yourself is that if you don't

00:08:38.280 commit to working through the problems as they come, you're going to not have anything,

00:08:42.660 whatever the problem. Yeah. Right. And that's going to be the guarantee that you're left with,

00:08:45.940 you know, you're guaranteed to have nothing and nothing of value. And so, you know,

00:08:51.560 I never had that hesitation. Um, when I make up my mind that I'm going to do something,

00:08:57.460 I do it. And, and I've always been that way. Yeah. So I don't, yeah, I don't try to look too

00:09:04.100 far down the road, dude, because we ended up talking ourselves out of the best things,

00:09:07.340 you know, like what if I had sat there back in 1999 and I said, yeah, man, nobody's going to take

00:09:13.760 us serious. Somebody might break into the store. Uh, we might get sued. What if, what if,

00:09:18.800 what if, yeah, guess what? All those things happened. Every single one of them. You're,

00:09:22.840 what if our employees screw us over? What if, uh, what if somebody steals from us? What if

00:09:27.980 this happens? What if that happens? What if this happens and all the shit happens anyway? So like,

00:09:33.420 what are you going to do? Not go and have all the shit happen anyway, or are you just going to

00:09:38.440 go and deal with it as it comes? And so, you know, success requires courage in any area of life. And in the

00:09:45.060 last few years, when nobody would speak up because they were afraid, it really gave me some insight

00:09:49.880 as to where people are lacking in terms of creating their own, uh, you know, best version of their life.

00:09:56.640 It's the courage to go, man. Yeah, for sure. How do you balance though, with having a bigger vision?

00:10:02.500 So you say you don't want to overthink yourself into being paralyzed, but let's say somebody has a big

00:10:09.560 vision and they don't want to overthink. So how do they balance with what you're saying?

00:10:13.520 Just breaking it down to daily tasks, dude. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't like when I

00:10:18.340 think of what we're trying to do with our companies, I don't have to know every detail of how we're

00:10:24.220 going to get there. I know that when I show up today, I'm going to take the step today. And I

00:10:29.220 know when I show up tomorrow, I'm going to take another step. And I know that if I show up enough

00:10:32.900 days in a row and take enough steps, even though I might not know the exact way to get there,

00:10:37.420 we'll figure it out amongst the nuance of the path. You see what I'm saying? Be like me and you in the

00:10:42.360 jungle and we're fucking cutting down trees and we're like, well, I think it's this way,

00:10:47.320 you know, and we go down that way and we're like, it ain't this way. So let's go back over here and

00:10:51.480 it's trial and error. It's just a commitment to the progress, you know? So I don't, I don't think

00:10:56.240 that overanalyzing is helpful. I think it's paralyzing for most people, you know, we're always

00:11:01.780 going to find problems and we're always going to find what we're looking for. You know, if you look

00:11:05.540 for problems, you're going to find problems. If you look for solutions and you look for ways to make it

00:11:09.860 work and you look for ways to make it successful, you're, those things are going to pop out as well.

00:11:14.480 So, you know, I think a big vision is the same as a small vision. It just takes more time.

00:11:21.240 You know, I love it, man. I love it. Well guys, we know you love it. Yeah, I do, man. It's cool.

00:11:28.120 You love it. And everybody loves that. You love it. Yeah, that's good. That's good. I'm glad you guys

00:11:33.440 love it. So that, uh, I got three good ones for you, man. Uh, guys, any question number one? Hey,

00:11:40.320 Andy, uh, what's your opinion on an entrepreneur who after achieving some success in their first

00:11:48.560 five years, believe that they have the Midas touch, uh, and, and assumes they can easily replicate that

00:11:55.740 success in other ventures. Do you think this could risk undermining the original business that brought

00:12:00.940 them success? Um, like you, I view, uh, entrepreneurship as a constant uphill battle

00:12:06.360 filled with its challenges and setbacks along the way, um, that require unshakable determinations

00:12:11.480 to overcome. It just frustrates me when entrepreneurs and their own lookers buy into a false image of

00:12:16.300 what it truly takes to run a profitable, uh, successful business, especially during the early

00:12:21.180 stages, uh, when the reality is often far from what's portrayed on social media. Uh, have you ever

00:12:26.320 questioned the success of your peers, knowing the struggles that you've had to personally endure,

00:12:31.360 um, uh, to build your own business and the longevity you needed in your marketplace to

00:12:36.740 reach your goals and should entrepreneurs revisit the myth of Icarus during periods of success to

00:12:41.900 remind themselves of the importance of humility. Please advise. Yeah, a hundred percent. I love that

00:12:47.760 question. That's a fucking great question. You guys want to ask questions on the show, ask questions

00:12:52.360 like that. That's a great philosophical question about the mental state that you have to have when

00:12:58.480 you're pursuing your dream. And it's very easy when you start to have some success to believe that it's

00:13:04.480 you and to think that it's you and it's not you. What it is actually is a past version of you that took

00:13:10.400 all the steps necessary to create the present success. So it's not even the present you that's created

00:13:17.260 the success. It's who you were the last 60 days, the last six months, the last year that's created

00:13:23.740 the present success. So the first thing that you have to realize is that you today didn't even create

00:13:29.880 what the fuck you are living. That's the past you. So like when you do a little cheers and you're out

00:13:34.720 with your buddies, cheers your past self for being tough enough to fucking persevere to create where

00:13:39.600 you are. Secondly, you need to realize that if you don't continue to move in that direction,

00:13:46.240 you're going to lose. All right. And this is where ego comes in and humble comes in. Okay.

00:13:52.800 Humble is not about the car you drive or the house you live in. Humble is about recognizing when you're

00:13:57.900 getting a little bit too much belief in yourself and you're not realizing that you are the product of

00:14:03.600 the actions that you've taken. And that's something that people struggle with, especially when they

00:14:07.800 first have success. You mentioned the Icarus, you know, story. If you guys don't know the Icarus

00:14:12.600 story, he flew too high to the sun. He got too cocky. The sun melted the wax that held his wings

00:14:17.580 together. He died. All right. So that's a metaphor for what happens to us in, in life, in relationships

00:14:24.720 and success. We start taking things for granted. We think that we are the reason for everything good

00:14:30.740 around when in reality, we are not the reason we are the product of actions. Okay. And so, um,

00:14:37.800 when you think about how to apply this concept, uh, you mentioned the Midas touch for those of you

00:14:43.440 that don't understand what he was saying, I use this, uh, analogy of the Midas touch with young

00:14:49.120 entrepreneurs. Okay. And there's this thing called the Dunning Kruger effect. And basically what the

00:14:53.640 Dunning Kruger effect says is that someone who starts out and has moderate success instantly,

00:14:58.900 they have an inflated sense of what they actually know. They think that they are the shit. They think

00:15:05.620 that the reason they're winning is because they are the shit and nobody else is the shit. It's them.

00:15:10.720 Okay. And what happens is, is they find out real soon that that's not actually the case.

00:15:17.400 Okay. The actual case is you did some basic things that produced a little bit of success

00:15:23.180 and you have a lifetime of learning to still go through. And so what happens is, and usually how

00:15:29.740 this happens is someone has some success and then they lose it. And then they come back down the

00:15:34.280 Dunning Kruger curve and end up at the bottom. And now you're in a position of humility. Now you're

00:15:38.960 saying, all right, what did I do to fuck up? How can I get back to going? And it almost takes that

00:15:44.300 desperation of losing to that level to create the humbleness needed to recognize that you need to

00:15:51.780 go back to the basics of what you did to get to the place in the first place. So, uh, these are all

00:15:57.460 real things and yes, people struggle with them. The Midas touch is where people who have a little bit of

00:16:03.100 success start to believe that they can do anything. Let's say you are, uh, you know, you're a contractor

00:16:10.060 that does concrete and you're fucking doing concrete your whole life. And you've built this amazing

00:16:14.800 concrete business and it's making you, you know, seven figures a year. Personally, you're doing

00:16:19.440 really well with it. Um, that person will then think, well, I can open a snow cone stand. Okay.

00:16:27.560 Something that's completely unrelated to what they do and I can make it work because I made this work

00:16:32.760 and that's not the case. That's like saying, because I play the oboe at professional level,

00:16:39.580 then I can go play the saxophone the exact same way. And that's, they're two different things.

00:16:44.500 And people don't understand that every business has its own knowledge base, its own skillset that

00:16:49.740 you need to have. Now, are there people that know the structure of companies and how to find people

00:16:54.460 and put them in the right spots? Yes, I can do that. I've been doing that for a long time,

00:16:57.860 but that's not me having the expertise. That's me having the resources to hire the people with

00:17:03.560 the expertise, put them into play and get them to run. Okay. So it's possible to do, but it's not good

00:17:09.200 for an inexperienced entrepreneur with little resources because it can like mentioned in the

00:17:14.520 email and undermine the entire original business, which then cuts off your cashflow,

00:17:19.040 which makes you broke. All right. So it's very important to understand you are where you're at

00:17:26.160 because of actions that your past self took. And if you don't continue to improve that skillset

00:17:32.880 and take those actions at a bigger and higher level, you will not grow as an entrepreneur.

00:17:38.540 Your business will not grow. And if you don't do that, and instead you'd say, well, I'm going to go

00:17:43.920 open the snow cone stand when really I'm an expert in concrete. Now you have a real problem because

00:17:49.040 you're going to go fuck something up. May not be the snow cone stand. Maybe the thing after that,

00:17:53.380 but you're going to end up cutting off your initial income stream. It's allowing you to have

00:17:59.180 these options because you're misunderstanding your own skillset and how to apply it. So it's very

00:18:04.940 important that we recognize that just because we're good at one business doesn't mean we're going

00:18:10.140 to be good at another business. And if you get to a point where you can invest in other businesses

00:18:14.780 and you're very successful, you never want to sacrifice your main courses for these other

00:18:21.180 businesses. You see what I'm saying? Right. Right. I mean, I think there's, I mean, obviously this is a

00:18:25.540 very in-depth topic, um, that that's covered in, we could talk about this 50 fucking different

00:18:31.740 hours. Yeah. Um, and RTA is a great resource for people who are sure stuff, but, uh, just, just

00:18:38.020 quick on the new MS CEO project, bro. Yeah. That's going to be fucking awesome. I can't

00:18:41.540 fucking wait. I can't wait to get back to talking about how to win all the time like that. What

00:18:46.960 I've learned is that's what I love to talk about. I love it. It was necessary, man. Yeah. It's

00:18:50.900 necessary, but I do want to ask you this question because, and by the way, we're not quitting

00:18:53.960 CTI. A lot of people are like, Oh, don't stop CTI. No, it's two different things, guys. We got

00:18:59.000 what's going on in the world, comedy, fuck around, have fun. And then we got how to win so

00:19:05.000 that we can fix the culture here in this country. Yeah. Um, now I'm not an entrepreneur,

00:19:10.620 right? Like I've always, I would fall in the category of everybody else. Right. And I think,

00:19:15.480 you know, outside looking in, there's always been this idea of, and you've heard, I know

00:19:20.160 you've heard it, man. Like, Oh, you got to diversify yourself, have these seven different,

00:19:24.180 you know, things going on. Yeah. Right. The average, the average millionaire has seven different

00:19:28.740 income streams. Right. Right. Okay. 20, 2022 was 2020. This is what we're going to see for

00:19:34.020 the next month. 2022 was the rebuild. 2023 was the, uh, the reconstruction. 2024 was

00:19:42.680 the trial and 2025 is game time. Right. That's what we're going to see for the next fucking

00:19:47.820 30 days. Uh, and same motherfucker posting that shit every fucking year too. Yeah. How

00:19:53.680 many fucking practice years do you need? Motherfucker. You need another one trial 3.3. Yeah.

00:19:58.420 Right. Fuck out of here. Uh, but I do want to ask you this because we started off this show

00:20:02.000 talking about, you know, 26 years in business. It started makes you feel old, bro. It's

00:20:05.980 a good thing. I don't look old. Yeah, you don't. You look 26. Yeah, that's right. Yeah.

00:20:09.260 I got you, bro. I got you. See that? See that? But I do want to ask you. DJ's got some value

00:20:14.660 around here. I want to ask you because we started about talking about, you know, that first business

00:20:21.960 of yours, right? Like, and you started that in 99. At what point did the second, I guess the

00:20:28.660 second opening come where you were like, okay, well, like we did, we're doing this really,

00:20:32.400 really well. Now we can advance. And there wasn't like a straight, this is a great question

00:20:37.220 or is it a vertical? No, this is great. So there is exceptions to what I just said about

00:20:42.880 starting businesses. And one of them is verticals within your business. Okay. So like, let's

00:20:47.760 say you're making motorcycles and you're working on motorcycles all day long and you got this

00:20:52.040 and then all of a sudden you make some exhaust, right? Cause it goes together. Yeah. Right.

00:20:55.920 And so that's, that's what we did. We had retail supplements, retail nutrition, vitamins, all

00:21:02.220 those things. And then we worked, you know, we sat there for 10 years being like, well,

00:21:06.560 these guys are doing this wrong. These guys are doing that wrong, but we didn't have the

00:21:10.260 money to do it, you know? And so Chris and I sat there for years being like, well, if

00:21:16.860 we ever get the opportunity to do it, here's what we would do. And then when the opportunity

00:21:21.160 presented itself, because we had talked about it for so long, we had a really good idea of

00:21:25.100 how we were going to do it. And we just fucking went for it, you know? And, and, and I'll be

00:21:29.040 honest, that was a very difficult situation to get off the ground, but it was a big, uh,

00:21:35.540 it was a vertical in our system that we felt comfortable that we knew and understood because

00:21:39.840 of our experience in retail. And when we first started, everybody was like, Oh, that's never

00:21:44.600 going to fucking work. Well, here we are motherfuckers. So if you know what you know, and you know

00:21:50.680 how to, you know, these vertical aspects that fit into your core competency, those are businesses

00:21:57.720 that you would really want to look at trying to open instead of being a concrete guy and

00:22:02.220 want to open a fucking snow cone stand, you might want to open your own concrete tool line.

00:22:07.620 You see what I'm saying? Right. Or, or something, a proprietary mix. Yeah. Something that's in

00:22:13.640 line with what you already know. Right. So, and then you're fucking leveraging your own customer

00:22:18.040 base. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So like, you don't have to go out and find a

00:22:21.360 whole, the customers that want snow cones and the customers that want a concrete fucking

00:22:24.860 walkways, two different things. Right. But if you can figure out a way to vertical those

00:22:29.360 in, you don't have to go out and replicate a whole new customer base. Okay. Yeah. I mean,

00:22:33.780 that was the question, man. Cause I feel like that comes up a lot. Yeah. It's just vertical

00:22:36.940 integration of your business. Like, dude, that's, that's very, you know, people will argue

00:22:41.760 against it and they'll say, well, it doesn't make sense. Just use this drop shipper and this

00:22:45.780 and do this and contract this out. Yeah. I mean, you could do it that way, but I can tell

00:22:51.880 you this, your company makes a lot more fucking money when you do it the right way, the slow

00:22:55.180 way and the vertical way. Yeah. It's just way more profitable. Yeah. I mean, it makes sense

00:22:59.520 to me, man. Um, I love it, man. Guys, Andy, question number two, let's keep this cruise.

00:23:05.420 Oh, let's keep this show moving. Well, I almost said, keep the cruise moving. That's all right.

00:23:10.420 Uh, guys, Andy, question number two, I have a question. I'm a business owner in the automotive

00:23:17.160 performance world. I've been doing it for myself since 2015. I do a lot of resto mod GM vehicles,

00:23:24.640 as well as late model performance stock to 2000 horsepower. I am the only employee, um,

00:23:30.920 though every once in a while I have put, uh, some part-time help in, it seems hard to find good help

00:23:36.440 in South Florida. Employees are good for a few months. Didn't get lazy and forget things.

00:23:40.780 Um, and I feel I treat them good with bonuses. I really pay competitive, all that good stuff.

00:23:46.200 Um, I have only ever dreamt of working on these cars, um, like 69 Camaro, Chevelle,

00:23:53.300 Smokey and the Bandit, Trans Am, um, even as far as celebrities like Marquise and Mike Pouncey,

00:23:58.840 Rick Ross. I currently have one of his cars in my shop. Um, and very wealthy people. I am six months

00:24:03.640 shy of 40 years old, uh, and feel as I get more recognition from my line of work, I get more

00:24:10.180 stress. Customers wanting work, uh, to their cars. They want them quick people showing up for quotes,

00:24:15.420 et cetera, et cetera. The question is how do I manage to handle all this recognition

00:24:20.780 and the workload flooding in? I would appreciate any insight to this question.

00:24:25.600 I mean, real talk, bro. It sounds like you're kind of bitching about something that could be a lot

00:24:30.700 worse. You know, why don't you remember all the times when nobody gave a fuck who you were

00:24:34.560 and nobody knew who you were and nobody wanted to do the fucking work or have you do any work on it?

00:24:39.520 Okay. You're in a good spot and you're kind of spitting the gift horse mouth. You know what I'm

00:24:42.880 saying? Like, fuck dude. Uh, this bro, huh? You wanted this. Yeah. So let's talk about instead of

00:24:48.680 complaining and saying, Oh man, I don't know what to do. Let's talk about how great this is for you.

00:24:53.840 Okay. You've built a brand. You've built an in-demand personal brand. People are starting

00:24:58.620 to know who you are. You're getting some celebrity clientele, which I know enough about the car

00:25:03.040 business, which is super helpful. Okay. Um, so how are you going to leverage that? And that's what

00:25:08.040 you need to be thinking. How am I going to leverage that? How am I going to scale that? You know,

00:25:11.820 you said I'm the only employee. Well, what if you had 20 employees could pop out a fucking car a week

00:25:16.240 or car every two weeks, how much money could you make? Right. And by the way, would you be happy

00:25:21.920 doing it or would you be happy to doing it yourself? One of my, I've, I'm one of my buddies

00:25:27.100 who's one of the most famous fucking, uh, craftsmen in the world. He prefers to work by himself.

00:25:32.560 And so everything he makes is super expensive because he does it on his own. All right. So

00:25:36.900 there's multiple places you can go here. You can raise your price and do all the work yourself.

00:25:41.200 You can work to scale out a team, um, take on more work, make more profit. Uh, it depends on how you

00:25:49.820 want to do it, but I want to go back to something that you said, you know, you said most of these

00:25:53.520 employees are lazy or don't, you know, they forget shit after a week or whatever, dude,

00:25:59.280 that is you not leading them. Like that's you not leading them. Like I guess it's not the

00:26:05.620 fucking employee's fault that they're fucking not productive, bro. It's your fault. You hire them

00:26:10.860 in. That is your responsibility. Of course they have to meet you halfway and they got to do their

00:26:15.860 part. And most people want to do their part. And if they don't want to do their part, you either

00:26:20.420 hired the wrong people or, and this is more likely you're not painting the proper vision

00:26:25.760 that makes them believe that they can have a future working for you. Who the fuck wants to show up and

00:26:30.900 get paid 15 bucks an hour to get grease on their fucking hands or whatever you're paying them and go

00:26:36.500 home and not have any fucking future. Like imagine how hard that is. Imagine how hard it is to get up

00:26:43.820 every single day and work for a company that we have no idea where it's going. We have no idea if

00:26:51.000 I'm going to have an opportunity here. Like all the people that you are bringing in, they're coming

00:26:55.860 in and they're like, this is great for now, but I got to find something else. And the reason they're

00:26:59.760 feeling that way is because you're not leading them. You're not saying, Hey, we're going to become

00:27:03.460 the biggest custom car builder in the world or whatever it is you want to do. Right. But these guys and

00:27:10.840 their fucking lives and their dreams, you're asking them to trade a major thing, which is their life

00:27:17.180 and their dream. And so you have to figure out how to get that inside of your dream. And because

00:27:23.680 you know, you're, you're a mechanic or, you know, bill, I don't want to, you know, you're a car

00:27:28.900 builder. You're, you're not your leadership skills. That's a different skillset. That's like,

00:27:33.520 that's like saying, you know, like I said, playing the saxophone or playing the, Oh, it's a different

00:27:37.780 thing. And so you need to learn leadership skills and understand how to paint your vision,

00:27:41.720 which should look like this. Hey bro, come work for me. We're going to fucking do this and this

00:27:46.660 and this, we're going to get Rick Ross is out there. We're going to get Mike Pouncey's car out

00:27:50.540 there. We're going to, you know, we're going to show all these people the cool shit that we do.

00:27:54.020 And we're going to build this awesome brand, change the car culture. Like bro, car culture is one of the

00:27:58.180 easiest cultures to work with. Everybody's cool. Everybody's friendly. It's just,

00:28:02.320 my point is you have to build a vision for these people that they see a part in,

00:28:08.680 or you're going to be, you know, running through employees forever. And then by the way,

00:28:13.960 you have to mean it. It can't be lip service because the only thing worse than not having a

00:28:18.540 vision is lying to your people and saying the vision is this, because once they figure that out,

00:28:23.480 they fucking all going to leave. And then you're fucked. Yeah. So it's like you said in the beginning,

00:28:27.200 but like most people have that vision of like, okay, I want the family. I want this right.

00:28:30.720 And so you got to fucking have an environment. How can they do that? How can you, how can you

00:28:36.520 have a family, own a home, have the American dream inside of your system? How can your people do that?

00:28:43.180 And if you can't tell them how to do that, then you're going to have a problem keeping people

00:28:47.120 long-term. Yeah. I love that, man. I want to ask you this though, because you know, we,

00:28:52.140 I know obviously we met, I met a few people, you know, through you because of you, right? That,

00:28:57.000 and I don't know if this is the right term, I guess you would use, but they've learned how to,

00:29:01.920 I guess, finesse the supply and demand aspect of the solar entrepreneur, right? Like you got guys

00:29:08.440 like your tattoo artists, right? Like that's a one man show and his demand is very fucking high

00:29:13.580 because he, it's only one guy, you know what I'm saying? Like he's tattooing you by himself.

00:29:17.620 So like, I mean, maybe leadership is not his best thing. He wants to keep it solo.

00:29:21.680 So how do you, I guess, how do you leverage, how do you finesse that supply and demand?

00:29:26.700 Well, that's going to be, that's going to be an aspect of, you know, if you only have

00:29:30.700 so much time and it's going to be a one man show or two man show, then your price is going

00:29:35.240 to have to go up. Yeah. You know, and that's just reality.

00:29:37.620 But the work has to fucking match the price. Oh yeah. Yeah. You're not going to charge big

00:29:43.220 price for mediocre work. Yeah. Yeah. All right. I love it, man. I love it guys. Andy,

00:29:48.360 let's get to our third and final question guys. Question number three. Hey Andy, I am 23 years

00:29:54.920 old. I've been watching your show for two months. It has been helping me in so many ways. I want to

00:30:00.680 ask you about the time management. When we focus on our goals, we have to put so many hours into it

00:30:08.340 and it affects our social lives. Sometimes to our family and the closest friends, I feel regret

00:30:14.280 about not giving enough time to them. But I know if I don't put enough time into my work,

00:30:20.780 then I would not be happy and achieve what I want where it would take more time to reach there. I

00:30:25.260 don't want a delay in that. How do I balance those things? You can't, you can't look at balance and

00:30:31.160 think that it's appropriate for building a company. It's the hardest thing in the world,

00:30:34.960 building a company, becoming an entrepreneur has been glorified to the point where people think they

00:30:40.700 can do it and have everything else too. It's fucking impossible because it's too competitive.

00:30:45.520 All right. So your idea of balance as everybody else has balance is not appropriate to you being

00:30:51.720 an entrepreneur and having balance. Okay. It's two different things. You're out here in the world

00:30:58.280 and you're seeing all these memes and all these Instagram therapy, fucking bullshit things that are

00:31:05.060 written and you're thinking they apply to you. They don't fucking apply to the entrepreneur.

00:31:08.740 That's a different life. Okay. And it, you will not have balance at least for the first fucking five

00:31:15.160 to 10 years. You're not going to have balance. You're going to have to put it in, but here's

00:31:19.100 the good news. In 10, 15 years, when you've put in all that, you're going to be the guy that could

00:31:23.300 take care of everybody. You could solve everybody's problems. You can make their life more comfortable

00:31:27.060 and they're going to be very thankful for you. And yeah, you might lose some friends and you might

00:31:31.560 distance some relationship, but the net positive out of it outweighs that. All right. But you

00:31:37.720 guys have to understand all this shit that you read online, all these memes about balance,

00:31:43.180 all these things about, you know, that the average person is reading is like, yeah, they

00:31:49.420 are not written for entrepreneurs. Okay. They're not, it takes more. It takes, it's harder.

00:31:56.300 It takes way longer and the reward is way bigger. Okay. It takes a lot more risk. Usually when things

00:32:03.120 take more risk and they're harder and they take longer, there's a bigger payoff and that's

00:32:08.100 what the fuck entrepreneurship's about. So you are investing your time today into an outcome

00:32:15.200 that will produce results. It's not a sacrifice. People will say, Oh, it's a sacrifice because

00:32:20.440 I'm sacrificing my time with this, with my friends. No, you're making an investment in your

00:32:26.100 future self that is going to be exponentially worth it as opposed to you being in the same

00:32:32.860 financial position that you're in now, 10 years from now. All right. So you have to look

00:32:37.540 at this the right way and you have to stop looking at all this touchy feely therapy fucking bullshit

00:32:44.340 that's on the internet because it'll make you feel as an entrepreneur that you're totally fucking

00:32:49.060 up. And it's just the way it is as an entrepreneur. It's, it's a, it's, you have to be selfish

00:32:54.080 first to be selfless later. And that's the reality of being an entrepreneur. You're going

00:32:59.660 to carry the water. You're going to carry the weight. You're going to put the shit on

00:33:02.260 your back and fucking drag it down the road. But then later, everybody's going to be happy

00:33:07.100 you did it because everybody's going to benefit from it. So we can't look at all of this shit

00:33:12.800 out there. You know, we have this victim culture mentality still that has been propagated for

00:33:17.820 the last decade all over social media. And quite honestly, uh, you know, 90 fucking 5%

00:33:25.960 of the therapy industry is predatory towards this culture. They want people to feel like

00:33:30.660 victims so that they have to quote unquote heal for the rest of their lives. When are they

00:33:35.660 healed? When do they actually become a normal person again? They don't because they want to

00:33:40.320 capture these people and get them in a mentality that there's always something fucked up around

00:33:44.760 them because that equals money to them. Okay. There's very few quote unquote therapists

00:33:49.420 that actually cure people. Why is that? Oh, because it's counterintuitive to their income

00:33:54.880 stream. And that's the reality. People don't like that. But on top of all of that, on top

00:34:00.560 of, you know, victim culture and taking advantage of it, which by the way, if you've convinced

00:34:04.740 someone that there's something wrong with them and then you make them pay you to fucking

00:34:07.620 fix it, you're a piece of shit. Okay. And I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck how

00:34:13.100 many fucking letters you have behind your name. Yeah. All right. But the truth, a hundred

00:34:17.300 percent, a hundred. Imagine they could, someone's telling someone they're fucked up so they could

00:34:22.080 pay you and then trying to keep them in that zone that they're fucked up. All right. That'd

00:34:25.860 be a hundred bucks. That's what I'm saying. Like, bro, it's fucking bullshit. Okay. And because

00:34:31.220 we have that in society, we have a lot of the entrepreneurs, a lot of the achievers, a lot

00:34:37.000 of the people who are driven, which are some of the most important people in the world.

00:34:41.240 And in fact, they're probably the most important because they provide all of the goods and

00:34:45.860 services that create civilized society. All right. So when we shame them about going out

00:34:52.260 and building things and we make them feel bad about becoming successful and we make them

00:34:56.400 feel fucked up for being entrepreneurs, the rest of society suffers because some of the

00:35:01.760 greatest fucking ideas and the greatest inventions and the greatest solutions and the greatest

00:35:06.580 cures die on the vine because of the shame culture puts on people to have ambitions and

00:35:13.000 goals. All right. And so this is a big problem because what we're actually doing is we're silencing

00:35:18.480 and removing some of the best ideas for a civilized society because we're telling motherfuckers

00:35:24.260 they're morally out of line for wanting to achieve it. All right. So we have to get in line here

00:35:30.000 and understand that when you read all this shit on the internet about, you know, having

00:35:34.540 zero anxiety and zero stress and all this fucking shit that is made for someone who is not trying

00:35:40.900 to build something incredible. They are not wanting more. They are not trying to become wealthy.

00:35:46.940 They are not trying to create jobs or solutions or cures to things. These are just people going

00:35:52.360 through life. And the truth of the matter is, is the reason they have so much fucking anxiety

00:35:57.680 is because they're not fucking doing anything with their life. All right. So we have to understand.

00:36:02.860 And by the way, I'm going to say another thing that everybody needs to understand about this.

00:36:06.680 When you look for an anxiety free day and you look for a stress free day and you constantly look for

00:36:13.980 that, what ends up happening is because you can't get through a single day without anxiety and you can't

00:36:19.820 get through a single day without these feelings of stress. It's impossible because it's called life.

00:36:24.840 All right. What ends up happening is the little moments of anxiety that do pop up in your day

00:36:29.920 become hugely amplified and become a problem because you're expecting there to be none.

00:36:35.720 So if you're expecting there to be none and then some shows up, what's your response? Fuck dude.

00:36:42.400 I can't get through a single day without being stressed. I can't get through a single day

00:36:46.260 without feeling anxiety. Well, no shit because that's called life. And you read all this bullshit

00:36:51.600 on the internet. That isn't true thinking that you can eliminate these things when in reality you

00:36:56.800 can't. So if you can't eliminate them and you're trying to focus on having a free day without this

00:37:02.420 shit or a life without the shit, you're going to constantly be irritated and disappointed and

00:37:06.760 frustrated because it's impossible. Okay. So we have to understand number one, most of this therapy

00:37:13.700 shit is garbage. Number two, you're not fucked up for wanting to achieve things. Number three,

00:37:18.700 we need people like you. We need people to go out and win. We need people to go out and drive cool

00:37:24.120 cars. We need people to show people what it looks like to be successful. We need cures. We need

00:37:29.100 products. We need companies. We need jobs. All of these things are needed. And just because some

00:37:34.320 fucking pussy on the internet is writing this shit that makes you feel touchy and feely and shit

00:37:39.200 doesn't mean it's for you. Okay. So we have to discern what information is for entrepreneurs

00:37:44.340 and success driven, ambitious people. And what information is for everybody else that's not

00:37:49.320 going to do a fucking thing. Okay. And we need to know the difference. Is Michael Jordan going to

00:37:53.280 read that and say, Oh yeah, you know what? I need to back off my competitiveness because it's

00:37:56.860 unbalanced. Right. You know, that's not, that's, it doesn't go together, dude. And because we're

00:38:02.560 inundated with all of this shit and it's popular, we end up in this scenario where we think there's

00:38:07.660 something really wrong with us. When in reality, bro, the world needs what the fuck we have.

00:38:12.140 The world needs what we have in our heart. It needs that fucking drive. It needs that

00:38:16.020 ambition. It needs that competitive attitude. It needs someone to drive the motherfucking

00:38:20.360 Bugattis, bro. If you don't drive them, who the fuck's going to drive them? You know what

00:38:24.360 I'm saying? Like, fuck dude. Like nice. Yeah. I'm just saying like, dude, you, you, somebody's

00:38:31.380 got to win. It might as well be you. I love that, man. It's so crazy. Cause I was thinking

00:38:36.540 about this too, while you were talking about that, they label these things so easily and make

00:38:41.100 it seem like it's the catch, right? Like the thing that I think happened in the last

00:38:44.540 year or two years, maybe, uh, is the fucking hashtag FOMO, right? Like the fear of missing

00:38:50.680 out shit. You know what I'm saying? I've never understood that. Like you're missing out on

00:38:54.300 what though? The same shit you've seen a hundred times. You know what I'm saying? Like that,

00:38:58.500 that's never. Listen, man, you got to understand there, there is multiple levels to this game.

00:39:03.100 Okay. There's people who, who want to be an entrepreneur, but can't really like jump. Those people

00:39:10.100 usually end up being franchise owners and they end up being great ones. Okay. They're

00:39:13.920 not able to create the entire concept, but they're able to run one. If you give it to

00:39:18.620 them. Right. Okay. Then you have people who create their own shit. All right. These are

00:39:23.360 like true builder, creator entrepreneurs. They come up with an idea. The idea comes to fruition

00:39:29.300 in real life. And then we have people who think completely outside the boundaries of reality.

00:39:34.460 Elon Musk. I want to go to space. You're right. You see what I'm saying? I want to transmit

00:39:39.680 electricity through the air. Nikolai Tesla. Right? Like there's levels to the thinking and

00:39:47.620 you have to understand and be self-aware enough as to what category you fit in. Because if you

00:39:55.900 put yourself in the wrong category from an authentic aspect, you're going to be miserable.

00:40:01.460 All right. Like I know which one I am. I'm the middle guy there. I'm not the fucking guy who

00:40:06.000 says, let's go to space. Right. You know what I'm saying? I don't want to go to Mars. No,

00:40:08.660 I just, I want to build businesses and companies and I want to do things that are innovative,

00:40:12.440 but that's a different level of thinking. Right? I'm also not the guy that needs someone to lay

00:40:18.020 it out for me. I can fucking come up with an idea and make it work. You see what I'm saying?

00:40:21.860 So we got to know where we lie in all these things. And maybe you're not even the fucking

00:40:26.200 franchise entrepreneur. Maybe you're a very strong entrepreneur that doesn't want to wear the

00:40:31.320 stress of the company 24 hours a day. That doesn't want to be on their phone till fucking

00:40:35.600 midnight every night. Like I still am 26 years in. Okay. It's a different fucking life and it's

00:40:42.140 not for everybody. And if it's not for you and you try to do it, it's going to crush your soul,

00:40:46.080 bro. So we got to be authentic with where we are, what fits us, what's going to make us happy.

00:40:51.220 Like that guy with the car shop, that guy might be happy building one or two cars a year himself.

00:40:56.280 Yeah. Right. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, that's right. And that's okay, dude. Like I'm not

00:40:59.960 going to be on here and say everybody's the same and everybody has to go out and try to be a

00:41:04.200 fucking billionaire. That's not what I'm saying. We got to find the right area that we are fulfilled

00:41:10.080 in that we can pay for our lives in. And then after that, it's gravy, right? Yeah, man. I fucking

00:41:15.360 love it, man. Guys, Andy, that's a hell of a way to start a Monday, man. Yeah. All right, guys,

00:41:20.140 let's go out. Let's kick some ass this week. We'll see you tomorrow on CTI.

00:41:22.660 We'll see you tomorrow on CTI.

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - December 09, 2024

821. Q&AF： Battling With Success, Recognition Vs Work Load & Balancing Work With Social Life

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