829. Q&AF： Is It "Too Late" To Start, Taking Constructive Criticism & When Does It Get Easier？
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
196.88542
Summary
On this episode of The Realists, the guys talk about the end of January and how to deal with it. They also discuss how to prepare for the new year and what to do if you are struggling with a New Years Resolution.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
what is up guys it's andy for selling this is the show for the realists say goodbye to the lies the
00:00:21.380
delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today we have q
00:00:27.500
and af that's where you submit the questions and we give you the answers now you could submit your
00:00:32.620
questions a few different ways the first way is guys email these questions in to ask andy at
00:00:38.420
andy for selling.com or you go on youtube in the comment section of the q and af episode drop your
00:00:43.340
question in there and we'll pick some from there as well now throughout the week and this is going to
00:00:48.160
be a very busy week for the show we're going to have cti that stands for cruise the internet as
00:00:54.640
we put topics on the screen uh what's going on in the world and society we speculate on what's true
00:01:02.920
and what's not true and then we talk about how we the people have to solve these problems going on
00:01:07.020
in the world other times we're going to have real talk real talk is just five to 20 minutes of me
00:01:12.960
giving you some real talk and then we have 75 hard verses now there is a huge group of people starting
00:01:21.020
75 hard today uh and i would recommend that you do if you're unfamiliar with 75 hard it is the initial
00:01:28.080
phase of the live hard program okay and like i said you can get that for free in episode 208
00:01:33.580
um there's also a book called the book on mental toughness you can get that at andy for seller.com
00:01:39.500
when it's in stock uh it outlines the entire live hard program top to bottom left to right in and out
00:01:45.800
if you like the details it's a great book plus it has a whole bunch of chapters on mental toughness
00:01:51.300
why it's important how to utilize it to change your life okay and then when we have our 75 hard
00:01:56.700
verses episodes people have completed the 75 hard program come on and talk about how they were before
00:02:02.960
how they are now and how they use that program to transform their lives all right like i said huge
00:02:08.840
group starting today i would start today now we are the biggest show in the world that does not run ads
00:02:15.780
because we make a little barter with you a little deal the deal is very simple share the show okay
00:02:22.800
we put a lot of time and energy into the show if the show makes you think if it makes you laugh you
00:02:27.260
think it's good if you think it's good information if you learn something uh if it brings a new
00:02:31.640
perspective if it's entertaining do us a favor and share the show okay we're constantly dealing with
00:02:37.320
all kinds of censorship hopefully that will end soon but it hasn't yet um but we're still going to
00:02:42.620
keep that deal with no ads and share the show so uh do us a solid don't be a hoe share the show
00:02:47.760
all right what's up dude what's going on man dude i feel like uh time's moving quick we're like
00:02:52.680
already halfway through the first month of the year bro i feel like the opposite i feel like
00:02:57.480
january is like dragging on dude really yeah isn't that so weird i mean is that the whole times relative
00:03:02.480
thing man i don't know i feel like it's speeding past like we're already almost done with this month
00:03:06.600
it's crazy i don't know man i feel the opposite i went down the wrong uh pipe there they did yeah
00:03:13.660
got got in uh my vocals yeah you gotta be careful with that i know yeah i don't got all that practice
00:03:20.200
you got you know what i'm saying yeah all right um i need you i need you to school me up a little bit
00:03:25.860
you know how to do it i mean i mean fuck dude you can't be an expert at everything listen you get
00:03:31.200
with me after air and uh we can figure something out i'm sure hey did you guys ever find that that
00:03:37.880
new co-host application did you guys ever get on that you said you wanted to learn i'll teach you
00:03:43.480
um no i was just thinking i mean because we you know halfway through the first month january is always
00:03:48.580
an interesting time for a lot of people and so i got some really awesome questions for you
00:03:52.700
um but they're all kind of just focused on you know the the more personal side you know because
00:03:59.200
people are battling some issues going halfway through it's always right around this time i
00:04:02.260
guess yeah um i mean this is the time of year where everybody says the same shit bro i'm gonna
00:04:07.580
this is gonna be the year i'm gonna change my life i'm gonna do this i'm gonna do that i'm gonna do
00:04:13.400
this and by the second weekend third weekend which is where we are now everybody gives the fuck up
00:04:19.580
okay and then they wonder they spend the rest of the year miserable because they weren't able to get
00:04:25.620
their shit together they live a life they don't want they they look the way they don't want they
00:04:29.560
make the money they don't want and then they think they just got screwed by the world no bro you
00:04:34.000
screwed yourself yeah that's the reality halfway through the first month like all right we'll just
00:04:38.280
try next year yeah yeah yeah it's like people who on their diet you know they they mess up on tuesday
00:04:43.940
and they're like oh i'm gonna start again on monday right and between tuesday and monday they
00:04:48.820
stuff themselves because they're like oh i'm gonna start monday and then monday comes and they mess up on the
00:04:54.240
next wednesday then they stuff themselves and then they end up a hundred pounds overweight ask me how
00:05:00.320
i know that because i lived that for a long time dude and if we could just get people to understand
00:05:05.440
that if we fix your ability to adhere to a program you can do anything you want that's the ultimate
00:05:12.160
problem here the ultimate problem is you don't know how to do things when you don't feel like doing
00:05:19.520
them and when you can fix that you can fix everything yeah man um well let's do it then
00:05:25.760
let's get into some some some some real real hard truths that need to be discussed um a lot of people
00:05:32.840
going through some different things so let's get into these questions guys any question number one
00:05:36.860
um andy i've been working in hospitality for over a decade um i'm burned out and ready for a change
00:05:45.160
i've always been interested in graphic design and even took some courses online during the pandemic
00:05:50.880
but i have no formal experience in the field at 38 i feel like it's too late to start over
00:05:58.260
especially with financial pressures how do i pivot into a completely new career
00:06:02.880
without starting from scratch or risking my stability well look dude that's that's a common thing
00:06:10.860
that a lot of people have to deal with over a few different times in their life usually the first
00:06:16.020
thing i would like to say to you is are you sure that's what you want to do because a lot of times
00:06:22.920
you know things look good and shiny and new over here and we're bored with what it is that we're doing
00:06:29.100
and then we jump from something that we're pretty good at to something we don't know anything about
00:06:33.200
and we set ourselves back years okay so you don't want to do that so you want to make sure
00:06:39.240
that is something that you want to do now if you're already doing it you're already taking classes
00:06:45.420
and you're already practicing a good way to transition from where you are that has stability
00:06:52.460
into a new field that does not have stability yet is to do it a little bit at a time okay keep your
00:06:59.780
career where it is and then on your nights and your weekends and your free time you start doing
00:07:05.020
little jobs and little projects and little bit uh work for hire for different people getting
00:07:10.680
experience getting a resume getting good word of mouth recommendations okay and by the way getting
00:07:17.460
practice of how to actually service a customer not just make the design but how to do so in a way
00:07:24.840
that blows them away and makes them excited and makes them want to refer you to other people because
00:07:30.120
let's face it if you can't get referrals from the business that you have you're probably not very
00:07:35.260
good at what you do and if you can't get those referrals you're going to have a hard time getting
00:07:40.120
to a place of stability uh you know from where you are now so pivot a little bit at a time nights
00:07:48.380
weekends free time do these projects and as the income starts to grow over here you could start to
00:07:55.480
uh reduce your amount over at your career and then eventually make the jump over another thing that
00:08:01.680
you should do during this time is you should minimize expenses if you need to downsize your
00:08:06.140
apartment or your house you know or your car things that are quote-unquote luxuries for you right now
00:08:13.580
um and i realize you probably aren't driving a rolls-royce and you know you're probably well i'm just
00:08:19.200
driving a regular well you know what man maybe you got to get a shittier car maybe you got to get a
00:08:23.420
shittier house how bad do you want this new life how bad do you want this new career and the reality
00:08:28.420
of you know most people is they won't take a step back to take three or four or ten steps forward
00:08:34.160
right they want to keep that big car payment they want to keep that apartment or that house that's
00:08:39.080
they're comfortable in and they want it all but you can't have it all so keep the career you have
00:08:45.780
part-time over here practice get good word of mouth get a good resume build a good portfolio
00:08:52.660
slowly switch over and before you do any of that lower all the expenses that you have yeah people
00:08:58.620
don't want to sleep sleep on the piss day mattress yeah bro and that's part of the deal part of the
00:09:02.840
deal is you got to go through that time you're not going to be the first person in history that's going
00:09:07.540
to get where they want to go without facing the adversity of struggling financially uh struggling
00:09:14.580
socially struggling with balance right we have this problem in society where everybody wants
00:09:20.900
everything but they don't want to pay a price for anything okay and the great things in life
00:09:25.320
they take steps back to make steps forward okay that's the reality so we have to understand dude
00:09:32.860
if you really want what you say you want you're going to have to make some sacrifices that are
00:09:38.980
actually investments because there is a payoff on the back side and i think if people reframe
00:09:45.020
that perspective from oh i'm making all these sacrifices to no i'm making investments because
00:09:51.260
these are all going to pay off long term that's a different game it's easier to get up and go to
00:09:56.400
battle when you know that what you're struggling with right now is going to have a payoff and that's
00:10:01.400
the way the world works dude you know if you own a business you know you're going to push for three
00:10:07.340
or four years before you get real progress and then once you get real progress you're going to have a
00:10:11.960
ride for three or four years and then you know you're going to have to re-pivot and you're going
00:10:16.000
to have to readjust and re-acclimate and make a new plan and then push for another three years
00:10:20.800
it's phases dude and it's phases in your life too just not in business it's in your life if you want
00:10:27.720
to change you're going to have to push and there's going to be a delay gratification uh time frame where
00:10:33.980
you're showing up you're working hard you're giving everything you have but nothing's happening
00:10:38.620
and that time can be extremely frustrating and the reason that most people can't win is because
00:10:44.600
they can't make it through that time of frustration to get to the other side there's a reason that
00:10:49.940
there's the saying it's always darkest before the dawn okay because dude when you feel like you're
00:10:55.820
going to quit and you feel like things aren't going to work if you just keep pushing that's when
00:11:00.480
the things tend to work out another thing too i want to i want to bring up because uh and you hit on
00:11:06.420
this about you know using the the spare time to develop yourself and i and i've actually seen
00:11:11.600
this in play uh with you and how you run your company so you you tell your employees that all
00:11:15.720
the time like you're not going to get better at the nine and five nine to five that's right you
00:11:20.580
know i'm saying because let's let's talk let's go a little bit more deeper into that like how
00:11:24.320
what's the what's the hang up with that why do people not understand because that concept because
00:11:29.440
people think that their free time is their free time they think that when i'm off work i don't have to
00:11:34.860
work and when bro honestly it's such an amateur misunderstanding it almost fucking pisses me
00:11:43.820
off actually does piss me off i mean it ruins people no dude 100 you only have so much time bro
00:11:49.060
you got 24 hours in a day just like everybody else when you go to work you're expected to execute on a
00:11:54.900
job you're not expected to increase your skill set or get a lot of practice reps or take your courses
00:12:01.340
or your read your books that is the shit you do at home okay you do that in your free time quote
00:12:07.520
unquote free time and you could spend your free time uh you know partying with your homies and doing
00:12:13.620
all the shit but you can't expect your skills to grow if you're not actually actively trying to grow
00:12:18.240
your skills and guess what skills pay the motherfucking bills and if you don't have them you're going to be
00:12:23.280
broke that's reality so you have to decide how important is it to you is it important enough for
00:12:28.340
you to skip out on beers with the bros and fucking movie night with you know suzy rotten crotch you
00:12:34.520
know what i'm saying like some chick you don't even want to fucking be with yeah you know or spend time
00:12:39.360
around is your future worth that i think it is you know what i'm saying i think you'll think it is too
00:12:45.320
when you're making 10 times the income that you're making now and your life's together and you're you live
00:12:50.640
in a nice house you've got a nice partner that is actually someone that you know is on the level you
00:12:55.960
want you you got some nice cars you're doing well you're gonna say fuck dude i'm glad i did that
00:13:00.240
but because you can't see it right now you see it as this big sacrifice oh man i gotta go hang out
00:13:05.940
with the bros on guys night bro fuck that okay they're all gonna be broke in fucking 10 years
00:13:11.620
and you don't want to be so your time should be spent improving skill set like dude i disappeared for 15
00:13:20.300
years disappeared from social scene for 15 fucking years you know why because i had to get my skill set up
00:13:28.520
i didn't know how to run a company so you know what i had to do i had to do everything i could to learn how
00:13:33.460
right and that's not just me showing up every day and throwing fucking spaghetti at the wall and hoping
00:13:38.980
some of it sticks bro that's me going home reading books uh you know studying other entrepreneurs
00:13:45.080
calling other people that own businesses having meetings learning things you know back when i was
00:13:50.160
doing this there wasn't like this big quote unquote mentorship online which by the way is
00:13:55.540
99 useless anyway because all these motherfuckers haven't done anything but there wasn't guys like me
00:14:02.640
or at my let who have built big ass companies doing things like rt syndicate where you could get in
00:14:07.840
there there wasn't people like me doing mfceo project which launches in two weeks again right
00:14:13.480
that shit didn't exist there was books and then there was you know who you knew and how could
00:14:19.000
you have a meeting with them how could you get close to them and like dude i had a bunch of small
00:14:23.120
business owners that i happened to meet and know and i would do lunch with them or i would fucking
00:14:28.000
try to you know be around them as much as possible instead of hanging out with a bunch of dudes who just
00:14:33.560
want to get fucked up at the bar and by the way i like that that was fun but it's way more fun now
00:14:40.240
when i could do whatever the fuck i want right right so you have to understand dude that time
00:14:45.960
that you think uh you know is like people have this entitled mentality bro oh that's my time that's
00:14:54.120
my oh yeah okay it is are you working to get better are you are you going to work to get better so you
00:15:00.380
can provide for your family so you can provide for yourself or are you going to fucking sit in your fat
00:15:05.600
ass and fucking watch tv right it is your time and you get to choose what to do with it yeah so
00:15:11.320
that's real yeah and you get you get what you put in dude it's just what it is and people don't think
00:15:16.720
that they have this way of selling them uh selling themselves on a story that like oh well that you
00:15:23.180
know i'm gonna put in all this work and i'm gonna do all these things and i'm gonna do and it's still
00:15:26.920
not gonna work out and that's what they sell themselves on so that they can go have the
00:15:30.980
beers or go fuck off with the guys you know and uh it's just not true dude last thing i want to
00:15:38.080
hit on with this question too uh this this person is 38 years old can we talk about this concept of
00:15:43.940
starting too late is it too late is there like a definite no it's not too late bro but it's too
00:15:49.300
late if you're gonna be doing the way you've been doing it okay if you're gonna fucking you know
00:15:54.560
fuck off and do half-ass work and you know kind of float and hope that it's gonna work and shit
00:16:00.200
and do what you've done to get to 38 and be unhappy yeah it's too late okay if you're gonna
00:16:06.100
change your entire operating system and get disciplined and execute and take your time
00:16:11.640
serious and win every motherfucking day and build your skill set no it's not too late but had you
00:16:17.720
been doing this until you were 38 you'd already be a rich motherfucker so i know you're not doing it
00:16:22.940
now so if you approach the new thing like you did the old thing yeah it's too late but it's not
00:16:30.180
too late if you decide to change every way you go about it yeah i love it man yeah i love it guys
00:16:35.220
andy question number two uh andy i recently got some feedback at work uh that i came across as
00:16:44.080
defensive during a team meeting i didn't realize how much criticism bothers me until i started
00:16:50.260
reflecting on it um i want to learn to accept constructive feedback without taking it personally
00:16:56.740
uh but it's hard to not feel attacked how can i shift my mindset and see criticism as an opportunity
00:17:03.320
to grow you want to get better or not do you want to make more money or not do you want to have a nice
00:17:09.520
house or not you want to have a nice life or not if you don't get your little pussy hurt about every
00:17:16.340
time someone says something to you pout cry don't listen think you're right think you know everything
00:17:21.440
and then you know make it a big deal every time someone criticizes you if you actually want those
00:17:26.900
things you should be open to critiques and you should be willing to take them and say okay that
00:17:32.960
is true i need to work on this i need to improve here and that will improve and then be thankful for
00:17:39.260
it okay it's a totally polar opposite attitude we have people who get their fucking feelings hurt
00:17:45.300
and cry and moan and make excuses and say oh well you know they're not right i'm right those people
00:17:51.600
end up broke okay people who end up not broke are people who take criticisms and take critiques
00:17:58.240
even if they're directed at a personal level and say yeah dude all right i got that yeah okay so the
00:18:05.140
more that you can take critique wise and accept and be happy that you have it the better you're going
00:18:14.120
to get the less you can take the worse you're going to get and one of them pays well and one of them
00:18:19.440
does not so do you want to be rich do you want to make money do you want to be successful or do you
00:18:24.500
want to be a broke little fucking booger i think you hit on something is it true i think that like
00:18:30.700
that the part where you said is it true though like is is the criticism true yeah well a lot of times
00:18:35.540
dude it just depends a lot of times people can't remove their ego out of the way to accept something
00:18:40.040
as truth yeah right fuck that's the point like people will be like oh that's not fucking true
00:18:45.420
yeah right well maybe it's not but is it right right like i don't think you take everybody's
00:18:52.260
criticism like dude when these morons on the internet say shit about me i don't give a fuck
00:18:58.180
like bro i don't want your life i don't want to look like you i don't want to make the money you're
00:19:01.920
making i don't want your fucking any i don't want to drive your car i don't want to live in your
00:19:06.280
fucking house so why the fuck do i give a shit what you have to say about me right but if someone
00:19:11.220
who is successful says hey you should work on this i'm gonna stop and i'm gonna say hmm and i'm gonna
00:19:17.980
think back and i'm gonna audit all those situations moving up to this point in time and be like you know
00:19:23.280
is that true and then kind of work through these different scenarios and say yeah i did that there
00:19:29.640
i did this here that is something i could work on that is something i could get better at
00:19:33.280
and then and then look at the person be like bro thank you for pointing that out when you become
00:19:37.500
a mature uh you know man or woman and you're seriously driven to be better you're going to
00:19:47.900
understand that criticism and coaching is part of the thing that you need to be thankful for
00:19:52.700
but as you pointed out you got to be careful who you take it from and i wouldn't take it from
00:19:58.500
anybody that doesn't have a life that you fucking want unless it's someone who used to have the life
00:20:03.820
that you want that no longer has it because they can tell you how to avoid losing it it almost makes
00:20:09.640
me think too because like on the other hand you know you have people that will not tell you what's
00:20:16.000
wrong or not tell you the truth and tell you everything's okay you have people who will tell you
00:20:20.820
shit that's not even it dj you have people that will tell you shit that's not true to try to fuck you
00:20:26.680
up you don't even understand how fucking dirty people are girls are like that girls will fuck
00:20:32.440
you look fine oh yeah yeah girls will do that to each other all the time we all know it right they'll
00:20:37.780
tell they'll tell them how's this look oh that looks great knowing that it doesn't look good yeah
00:20:42.420
all right now imagine in business when you're competing with a bunch of people you don't think
00:20:47.000
that happens so you're gonna have a lot of people that are gonna tell you things that aren't true to
00:20:51.040
get in your head and try to fuck you up so you got to be real good about who you listen to and who
00:20:55.140
you don't and you got to learn how to tune certain things out and if they aren't where you want to
00:21:00.580
be they don't make the money you want to make they don't have the life you want to live you shouldn't
00:21:03.900
fucking listen to them and and if they do give you a critique uh and you're not sure you should dig in
00:21:09.960
and see hey what did this person do what have they built where is their headquarters where are their
00:21:14.200
employees how what have they done to get to this point where they think they can give me advice
00:21:18.360
i mean the reality is dude most people have no idea and they're so comfortable giving advice
00:21:23.040
on fucking anything any of you guys who have ever had kids know how much people want to give advice
00:21:30.020
on the fucking kids and then you look at their kids and their kids are little fucking shit bags
00:21:34.500
right yeah like their kids are running around like wild fucking animals and they're giving you advice
00:21:40.080
right that's that's the same shit that happens in business bro people are five dollars away from
00:21:47.060
being broke but they're giving you financial advice they've never run a lemonade stand but they're
00:21:51.520
telling you how to run your company right this is the shit that people do they want to fucking feel
00:21:56.520
good they they think they know shit that they don't and most people are you know they're they have an
00:22:02.300
inflated ego they think they're they're more important than they actually are i was gonna ask
00:22:06.560
you that's the same thing without not taking criticism it sounds like it's boiling down to just being an
00:22:10.540
ego issue oh yeah yeah both sides yeah yeah i mean bro your your ego your ego can be too big
00:22:17.460
to where you ignore good criticism it could be too beat down to where you take all the criticism and
00:22:23.760
then you have no direction on where you're going so you got to find a balance in there you got to
00:22:27.240
know what you know you got to know what you don't know you got to know who you should listen to and
00:22:31.800
you got to know who you shouldn't listen to and these are things that you have to figure out and if
00:22:36.120
you don't figure them out you're going to be confused and when you're confused it makes it hard to
00:22:40.060
effectively operate your life and your project of income or business or job or whatever you got
00:22:47.800
going on yeah i love it man well guys we got uh we got question number three got one more for you
00:22:53.000
um this is it's an interesting question let's check this one out uh guys andy question number three
00:22:59.700
andy i'm 27 years old and my question is very simple does it get easier i understand that it's life
00:23:09.280
right you get the crap beat out of you a few times but does it get easier and if it does then when and
00:23:16.660
if it doesn't how do so many people make it look easy i appreciate everything you do no it doesn't
00:23:23.160
get easier in fact it gets harder okay and i know that's hard for people to understand but when you
00:23:31.900
start in the beginning the decisions you make while they have perceived large consequences what's the
00:23:39.080
worst that could happen you fuck up your shit and you're back to zero where you were last week
00:23:43.200
okay when you actually are at a higher level you're making decisions that don't just benefit you or
00:23:50.220
affect you but you're making decisions that affect everybody right now in my life if i make a decision
00:23:57.140
in business there's thousands of people that have to deal with that decision 20 years ago when i made
00:24:02.280
that same decision it was six people right okay so it's totally different it does not get quote unquote
00:24:10.240
easier it just gets different all right you don't have the same struggles that you had when you have
00:24:17.300
some money as when you didn't have money but you got different ones all right and like people say oh
00:24:22.300
more money more problems no it's more money different problems okay because i don't have to worry about
00:24:28.740
me going out to dinner and paying the bill right or like sweating that like fuck dude i hope she
00:24:33.580
doesn't order that right right like but no real thing too sometimes 100 oh fuck yeah bro you think
00:24:39.580
i don't remember that yeah bro i fucking remember being on dates and sweating my balls off hoping that
00:24:43.960
she didn't order the fucking steak i'll just take a water yeah yeah bro like bro we've all been there
00:24:48.640
so so we have to get uh to an understanding that it's not going to get easier you have to get
00:24:58.100
stronger and that is why the live hard program is so successful it's why 75 hard is so successful
00:25:05.140
because it takes people who are mentally soft and it shows them that if they can control their
00:25:13.220
internal dialogue which they can and they can execute when they don't feel like it you become
00:25:20.360
in control of almost all the outcomes in your life most people can only execute when they feel good
00:25:27.260
if you could be someone who can execute whether you feel good or whether you feel like shit and
00:25:32.120
you can execute at a high level that means that the 30 percent of the time where they feel good
00:25:37.340
and the 66.666 percent of the time where they feel like shit and they're not executing you have a 66
00:25:44.620
percent advantage over the time that you're executing that they don't which means you're doing
00:25:50.460
two-thirds more work than what they're doing okay it's fucking math so you have to train yourself
00:25:57.180
to become someone who is resilient who has fortitude who has grit who can persevere who can pay attention
00:26:05.500
to their boss voice not their bitch voice and can execute against the things that they know are going to
00:26:12.040
move them where they want to go even when they don't feel like it and if you can do that it will
00:26:18.700
become quote-unquote easier you will perceive it to be easier it will not be easier you will be
00:26:25.260
stronger okay but that's the only thing you can do because you can't go write a letter to god and say
00:26:32.320
hey man it's pretty fucking hard down here take it easy yeah like hey i'd appreciate if you made it easier
00:26:38.300
for me that doesn't work okay but what does work is learning how to control the decisions that you make
00:26:44.740
a hundred percent of the time which give you control of most of the outcomes in your life
00:26:49.120
that is what makes it feel easier all right but no dude if you continue to operate the same way you're
00:26:57.220
operating and you continue to you know just hope that it's going to get easier it fucking doesn't
00:27:02.880
it does not get easier i remember having a conversation with a guy who was sort of a mentor to
00:27:08.460
me one time and i met him for lunch dude and this guy was a at the time he was a big fucking deal um
00:27:14.200
and i remember sitting we were we had lunch we were sitting at a bar and we were just talking and i
00:27:21.740
i looked at him and i said hey dude um you know because at that time in business every day that the
00:27:31.740
end of day numbers and the performance came in it i let it affect me in a big way so like i would get
00:27:37.980
my numbers at 10 o'clock at night and if they were bad i couldn't fucking sleep if they were good i
00:27:45.020
couldn't sleep because they were good right like so so every day i was looking at this performance
00:27:50.800
and it was driving me fucking crazy and i was about 10 years in the business here and i fucking looked
00:27:55.700
at him and i said hey bro when does that stop and he goes dude it doesn't stop he's like he laughed
00:28:03.060
he laughed at me he goes it never stops and he's right it never does stop and it's never stopped
00:28:07.980
that was i don't know 15 years ago 16 years ago it's never stopped i still i'm still the same way
00:28:15.940
um but i don't have the emotional ups and downs anymore because i've learned to be confident in
00:28:21.640
my actions and i know that i'm executing on a daily daily basis so if i'm executing on a daily basis
00:28:28.060
and i've been doing it long enough to know that that's what produces the results then i have
00:28:32.180
confidence in my actions that they're going to bear fruit in the direction that i want to go
00:28:37.120
and that takes away the uncertainty that takes away the fear that takes away the uh you know the
00:28:45.580
perception of hardness and it just becomes what you do every day so it's all about controlling
00:28:52.960
your own ability to make decisions the decisions that you know you need to make and then allowing
00:29:00.540
yourself to build confidence in the fact that your inputs are going to equal outputs and then putting
00:29:06.800
all the inputs in consistently and then understanding that it really doesn't matter what happened today
00:29:11.260
because uh what i did today isn't going to bear fruit for 30 60 90 days down the road right does that
00:29:17.720
make sense so so now i know that i'm planting the seeds i know there's going to be a harvest so i'm
00:29:23.700
not fucking freaking the fuck out it doesn't feel as hard does that make sense you're gonna water all
00:29:28.060
you can do is what the fuck you can do bro and if you can do the things you know you need to do
00:29:34.940
and you could do them every day eventually you will be in a place where you understand that those
00:29:41.240
seeds are going to bear fruit okay you ever heard of the chinese bamboo tree chinese bamboo tree
00:29:46.880
you plant the fucker in the ground okay and for five years it stays in the ground
00:29:53.900
for five years doesn't show any sprouting doesn't show any signs of life now if the farmer goes out
00:30:02.760
and fucking digs up the seed in three days because it didn't grow what's going to happen nothing
00:30:08.440
they're never going to grow right so you have to have it has to have water it has to have care it
00:30:14.160
can't be disturbed and then five years later it grows to a height of 80 feet in like six weeks
00:30:18.860
okay so that is how your career will work that is how projects work when you plant the seed you have
00:30:26.800
to water it you can't disturb it you have to keep doing making sure you're taking care of it and
00:30:31.060
eventually it goes real fast that's that's how your life's going to work that's how your business
00:30:35.660
is going to work it's like uh it's just a master class in delay gratification and most people can't
00:30:43.240
push through the delay part to ever get to the gratification they've never they've never been
00:30:47.700
able to learn how it actually works so if they don't know how it works you know when the time feels
00:30:55.620
like it's too long or it's taking too long they quit and they start over dude and this is why most people
00:31:00.400
you know they do something for two three four years and then they switch their careers completely
00:31:06.280
and they're like oh that wasn't for me i didn't like it when dude real talk they were probably
00:31:10.920
on the verge of having a major breakthrough you're two weeks away from it correct and so dude you have
00:31:16.360
this two to four year cycle where people work and then they get frustrated and then they and then
00:31:23.200
they quit and they change all right and now they're starting over from zero again so now you've got
00:31:27.640
another two to four years to learn the craft put in the work put in the time become disciplined
00:31:33.200
become a and then you get there and you're like oh and then they they start over again you do that
00:31:38.120
three times that's 12 fucking years you see what i'm saying yeah the 80 foot fucking bamboo tree by now
00:31:43.320
three of them right you know what i'm saying like dude it is a it is a the instant gratification that
00:31:51.180
we deal with in society is super damaging right people get on the internet especially with young
00:31:58.360
people they get on the internet they can talk to their friends across the world with the click of a
00:32:02.640
button they can order food and it's there in 10 minutes they can throw shit in a microwave and it's
00:32:07.760
it's cooked in three minutes they everything they want to do movies on demand fucking call it it hasn't
00:32:14.840
always been that way it's not always been that way in culture and life like you were you know dude i grew up
00:32:21.140
in a time where you couldn't talk to your friends across the world with the click of a fucking
00:32:24.840
button bro i mean it wasn't that long ago okay you you weren't connected when you left the house
00:32:31.780
all right there was a bunch of cultural differences that you know there was no grub hub there was no
00:32:38.740
instant food bro i remember when they started listen dude i can remember when pizza delivery started
00:32:44.240
it became started yes because bro it wasn't a big thing and then all of a sudden dude you could get a
00:32:50.100
pizza at your house yeah like do people that are young have no idea how much the world's changed in
00:32:56.280
such a short amount of time and because the world has changed to all these instant things people have
00:33:02.200
lost their ability to persevere they have lost their ability to be patient they've lost their ability
00:33:07.300
to push through and because the natural environment that we live in doesn't lend itself to learning
00:33:15.320
patience or learning how to persevere we have to put ourselves in intentionally hard situations
00:33:21.420
that force us to uh experience delay gratification which is another thing that live hard does and
00:33:28.540
75 hard does it's a fucking necessary boot camp for people to understand how to develop the qualities
00:33:35.940
that end up making them successful at anything that they do okay but you can't expect young kids
00:33:44.120
who have never had to exercise patience of any sort to understand patience right and that's a big
00:33:51.400
problem because to become successful it's going to take patience that's the one thing that hasn't
00:33:57.640
changed so everything else has changed everything's more convenient everything's faster everything's
00:34:02.920
instant but your career and your business didn't change that way you've still got to show up
00:34:09.340
way past the time where you're you know excited about it and you've got to execute for the results
00:34:16.340
to happen and that's reality dude and unfortunately you know most people that are listening to this
00:34:24.380
are between the ages of 18 and 35 and um most of those people haven't had a life that made them
00:34:32.780
uh learn these skills naturally okay and that's why you have to intentionally do them that's why we
00:34:40.480
have the book on mental toughness that's why the live hard program exists i built it for you guys so
00:34:45.940
that you guys could train yourselves to have these skills and these qualities that are going to make
00:34:51.520
you successful long term last thing i'm going to hit on man maybe this might be for another episode
00:34:56.320
um you know but this last piece of the question too i was just sitting here thinking is like why do so
00:35:00.740
many people make it look easy that's the other part too with the social media shit man is that you got
00:35:05.500
to keep in mind people you're seeing what people want you to see correct and there's really when you
00:35:12.980
deal with influencers on social media bro like you got to understand when you tell someone man this is easy
00:35:20.900
they're more likely to buy it okay um when you tell someone hey listen dude there is no fucking easy way
00:35:28.120
this is going to take everything you fucking have do you think they want to buy that
00:35:32.080
i go look somewhere else it's hard to fucking sell that yeah okay and then on top of it social media
00:35:38.400
in general is an egotistical platform all right now i i understand we all have to do it we all have to
00:35:45.760
put ourselves out there we all have to toot our own horn because if we don't toot our own horn
00:35:49.540
nobody's going to toot it for us so i understand we've got to step out we've got to be you know a
00:35:55.760
little bold but at its heart it's a narcissistic egotistical platform it's a look at me look at me
00:36:02.840
look at me right it is what it is it's necessary for business at this point in time for most people
00:36:09.040
all right so i'm not knocking it i mean if you're going to have them look at you you might as well
00:36:13.960
be a fucking rock star i'm just saying right but there's a problem with that especially when it
00:36:19.340
comes to entrepreneurs entrepreneurs are competitive people entrepreneurs like to tell
00:36:25.420
other entrepreneurs how good they are and they like to pretend like the hardest things are actually
00:36:30.080
easy for them and the problem with that is is that you put this out there because you want to seem
00:36:35.880
like you've got it all figured out and it's so easy for you and you have all these natural skills
00:36:41.000
and you're better than all the other entrepreneurs out there but here's the problem bro that young
00:36:46.560
kid who's 19 20 21 22 25 that guy's looking at you and it's hard as fuck for him and he's like fuck
00:36:54.840
it must be me it must be me that's messed up because this is easy and it's and so like dude i've never
00:37:01.720
i've never bought into that i've always tried to tell people like look dude this is the hardest thing
00:37:07.520
you're going to ever do it's going to take everything you got it's going to cost you your
00:37:11.400
old life 100 all your old friends all your old relationships but it's going to be worth it over
00:37:17.140
time because everything else that comes in your life is going to serve the vision and the goal of
00:37:22.240
what you're trying to become so it's a good thing it's just hard to go through and because we have so
00:37:28.620
many even real entrepreneurs we have some good real entrepreneurs that make it seem like they're
00:37:36.080
better than they are and i know these motherfuckers in real life like these guys will call me yeah and
00:37:41.900
they'll be like fuck dude what do you and they're stressing out right but but you go on the internet
00:37:46.320
and i'm talking about the biggest names out there dude and you go on the internet and they're like
00:37:50.860
oh yeah just do this and that and this this is easy blah blah blah bro it's it's not easy it's hard
00:37:55.680
as fuck and we don't do anybody any favors by making it seem easy just to appease our ego so that we can
00:38:02.440
look like we're better than the next guy you know what makes us look better than the next guy winning
00:38:06.800
bigger than the next guy you know what also makes us look better than the next guy creating as much
00:38:11.440
success as we possibly can and the way that we create as much success as we possibly can for other
00:38:16.420
people is by telling them the truth about how fucking hard it actually is and then preparing
00:38:21.460
them to go down that road okay instead of just saying oh man what's wrong with you you can't make
00:38:26.360
you can't make 50 grand a fucking day right you know like you know i'm saying like you can't you can't do
00:38:38.120
it i don't know it's i don't know how to say what i'm trying to say
00:38:44.320
we have a culturally fucked up society because of the environment and the technology that we have
00:38:53.860
available to us to where they have a hard time understanding that things that matter are still
00:39:00.820
very hard and take a lot of time and that's the biggest handicap that we have with young people
00:39:05.500
and so i've always tried and you can go back and check my receipts i've always tried to tell people
00:39:10.340
man like i'm pretty good at what i do i'm i'm real good at what i do okay i'm not gonna sit here and
00:39:15.280
fucking play it down i'm fucking one of the best in the world and what the fuck i do and it's hard as
00:39:20.240
fuck for me it's hard as fuck for me so i know it's hard for you okay so here's my advice get better
00:39:28.480
get stronger build more skills build discipline once you have the ability to have discipline and
00:39:34.680
you can adhere to any plan that is laid out before you there's nothing you can't do okay so that's my
00:39:41.780
advice on that i love it man yeah i love it guys andy that's three hell of a way to start a monday
00:39:46.800
yeah guys let's go out there big week this week uh culture's gonna change
00:39:51.480
wind is coming back let's get out there and kick some ass
00:39:55.000
went from sleeping on the floor now my jewelry box froze fuck a pole fuck a stole counted millions
00:40:01.840
in the cold bad bitch booted swole got her on bankroll can't fold doesn't know headshot case close