REAL AF with Andy Frisella - September 27, 2016


Balance Is Not Balance, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO96


Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

172.63449

Word count

1,996

Sentence count

153

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of the MFCEO Project, I talk about balance and how to balance your life so that you can have it all and still have time for your friends and family. I also talk about why it s important to have a good balance in your life and how important it is to have good friends.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
00:00:00.000 I want to be a motherfucking hustler. You better ask somebody.
00:00:11.440 What is up guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host and I am
00:00:17.960 the motherfucking CEO. Guys, if this is your first time listening, what is a motherfucking
00:00:24.700 CEO? Well, listen, the motherfucking CEO is the baddest motherfucker that you can be.
00:00:32.920 All right. You have to understand, although this is an entrepreneurial podcast, being the
00:00:39.320 entrepreneur of yourself, taking responsibility for yourself, looking at yourself as a business
00:00:45.380 is a key to living an excellent, fulfilling and awesome life. And dude, what fun is life
00:00:52.620 without going through it with a little fucking swagger? You know what I'm saying? You want
00:00:56.560 to go through it with like a little meek mouse, all nimbly bimbly. And if you know the movie
00:01:01.940 I'm talking about, you're fucking awesome. But do you want to be a meek little mouse or
00:01:07.020 do you want to go through life learning how to be a bad-ass motherfucker? And that's what
00:01:12.080 we talk about here. It's not just business. It's life. Okay. Guys, today I did something
00:01:18.500 a little bit different. I actually opened up my Snapchat, which I don't often do and
00:01:24.080 asked people what they wanted me to talk about. And I had a number of people, dozens of people
00:01:30.180 say the same thing over and over again. And that's what I'm going to talk about today, which
00:01:33.260 is balance. Okay. So many people asked me, Andy, I've got this girlfriend and on her anniversary,
00:01:44.780 she wants to go out and spend, you know, like 500 bucks. And all I can think about is putting
00:01:49.500 that money in my business. You know, should I just dump her? Or then I said, Hey Andy,
00:01:53.500 how do I balance my family and work life and friends with my new business? I'm trying to
00:01:58.020 start. Hey Andy, you know, how do I accomplish all my business goals and still have time for
00:02:05.280 my friends to go out with here? Let me answer this for you. You fucking can't. Okay. There's
00:02:12.200 two different ways to look at balance guys. There's two different ways. And the average
00:02:17.100 person looks at balance this way. They look at balance as a daily, possibly weekly task.
00:02:26.820 All right. I'm going to work X amount of hours a day. Then when I get off of work, I'm going
00:02:31.240 to spend time with my friends. Then I'm going to, then I'm going to do this. Okay. And I have
00:02:36.160 a nice balance a day. They might look at it like a week. All right. I'm going to work
00:02:41.580 hard Monday through Friday. And then on the weekends, I'm going to have time for my friends.
00:02:46.980 That's if they're like long sided. All right. There's also a completely other way to look
00:02:53.820 at balance. And this is how successful people over the course of their life, we're talking
00:03:00.420 financially, look at balance. They look at balance like this. I can work hard for 10 years
00:03:07.480 and then do whatever the fuck I want the rest of my life. I can work hard for 15 years,
00:03:11.480 give it all I have, do every fucking thing possible. And then I get to do whatever I
00:03:15.960 want for the rest of my life. That's balance. Is it not? Okay. So it's all how you look at
00:03:21.860 what balance is supposed to be. Here's the reality guys. You could not go through life being
00:03:28.820 most people. Let me rephrase what I was about to say. Most people will go through life trying
00:03:38.540 to be loyal to people that they have no obligation to be loyal to. That is, for example, high school
00:03:45.580 friends, grade school friends, this girlfriend or this, that you're going to progress. Okay.
00:03:53.700 Your goal is to try to progress and grow and be as good as you can and build this awesome
00:03:59.120 life that you dream about. If your friends are not on that same track, when you get to
00:04:05.060 that point, those people will not be in your circle of influence anyway. So what happens
00:04:11.400 is a lot of times where I see is people will sacrifice their business or the things they're
00:04:18.280 trying to build for these friendships. And that's a noble thought. I get it. I'm not saying
00:04:23.120 that, you know, I'm not trying to be a jerk, but I see people do this. Like my girlfriend
00:04:28.900 now doesn't want me to work this many hours. So should I just dump her or should I, you 1.00
00:04:34.040 know, have more balance in my life? Dude, first of all, your girlfriend now probably ain't 0.98
00:04:39.440 going to be your girlfriend a year from now. She probably isn't going to be there for the 1.00
00:04:43.480 next fucking 20 years when you're building whatever it is you're building. So if she's not
00:04:47.420 supporting it now, she sure as fuck isn't going to support it for that long. So I think
00:04:51.960 you know the answer to the question, you just don't want to fucking admit it. All right.
00:04:55.900 Lots of people waste their entire potential life being loyal to these people, quote unquote
00:05:00.900 loyal, quote unquote good friends to these people who are not good friends in return. They
00:05:07.420 are not supporting you. If they were great friends, would they not be on your team? Would
00:05:11.980 they not be supporting you to do and fulfill your dreams? Okay. Good friends is two way street
00:05:21.080 motherfuckers. And I see lots and lots and lots. And this is specifically for you young
00:05:25.760 people, lots and lots of young people who are in their twenties, who are sacrificing what
00:05:31.280 they really want for what they want now. And that is they want a relationship now, or they
00:05:36.080 want to stay with this girl now, or this guy now, and that person doesn't support them.
00:05:40.100 So what they do is they buffer their true reality of what they really want to come back down to
00:05:45.400 this relationship that's going on now. And then in three, five, seven years from now,
00:05:50.280 when that relationship finally runs its course, because you can't change your core values and
00:05:54.760 what you truly want in life, you're going to be unhappy. And that relationship is going
00:06:00.020 to fail inherently. So what difference does it fucking make if it fails now and you get to
00:06:05.860 work for the next seven years towards your goal, or if it fails in seven years and you gave
00:06:09.700 up seven years of working towards your goal? I think, you know, the answer to that. All right,
00:06:14.820 guys. So look and think about what it is you really want because life has a way of pulling
00:06:24.840 you off course. People have a way of pulling you off course. Not everybody is going to share
00:06:30.740 in your ambition. Not everybody is going to share in your goals. Not everybody is going to want
00:06:35.580 you to move past where you are. They're going to say things to you like, Oh, you're being selfish.
00:06:41.280 Oh, you're being materialistic. Or, Oh, you're being unreasonable. Or, Oh, you're, you're being a
00:06:47.380 dreamer. Or I heard all this shit guys, my whole life, all of it. And I still hear it. And you know
00:06:55.460 what? I don't associate with people that say that shit to me and you shouldn't either. Okay. People are
00:07:02.040 going to tell you, you work too much. You work too hard. Your priorities are out of whack.
00:07:09.100 Recognize any of those things? Okay. Are your priorities out of whack or are their priorities
00:07:15.240 out of whack? Or is it that your nature and their nature just don't go together? Okay. And I'll give
00:07:22.280 you a hint. It's the last thing. There's nothing wrong with somebody who wants to live an average
00:07:27.120 life if that's what makes them happy. But if you don't want to live an average life and you're with
00:07:33.260 somebody who does, and you guys are always constantly fighting, she's constantly nagging or
00:07:38.780 he's constantly nagging or putting you down or not supporting you, you will not make it. It is
00:07:46.200 impossible because success guys is fucking hard. It takes all your energy. It takes all your time.
00:07:53.700 It takes all your dedication. And if you have someone trying to pull that away from you,
00:07:58.760 you can't possibly give what it takes to make your dreams a reality. So you have to audit your
00:08:06.420 circle. You have to look around and say, yes, this person believes in me. Yes, this person supports me.
00:08:12.580 Yes, this person wants me to succeed. Or no, this person doesn't. And no, this person thinks I'm
00:08:18.700 being crazy. And no, this person doesn't believe in me. And that's hard. That's hard. It's hard.
00:08:25.840 I'm not going to sit here and say it's easy. It's easier for me because I've been doing it for 20
00:08:30.920 years. It's hard, man. You know, there's been girls that I really cared about that I had to cut out of
00:08:36.480 my life. There's been friends that I really cared about. I had to cut out of my life because we didn't
00:08:40.880 share the same ideals for what life was about. You know, they were happy doing their thing
00:08:48.600 and I was okay leaving them alone and letting them be happy. But they weren't supportive of what I was
00:08:56.040 trying to do. So we were no longer able to be friends. Does that make sense? Okay. Just because
00:09:02.180 someone, just because you're okay with someone being okay, doesn't mean that they're okay with you being
00:09:08.060 you. And you have to audit yourself and be aware of these things all the time, guys, because
00:09:12.660 you will spend a disproportionate and, and crazy amount of effort and energy and time
00:09:19.620 fighting and struggling and pulling through these, these quote unquote toxic relationships
00:09:27.340 that, that will actually keep you from being able to apply the energy needed to make success happen for
00:09:34.080 you, whatever success might be. Okay. So when we talk about balance, there's a couple of things in
00:09:41.320 play here, but the main thing really is that you're not surrounding yourself with people who see the
00:09:46.980 perspective of life and balance the same way that you might see it, or possibly you could be seeing it
00:09:54.080 the average person's way, which is on a daily slash weekly basis. Okay. Success is hard. Building a
00:10:02.280 business is hard. Being successful and high achiever inside of another company is hard.
00:10:07.300 You are going to face criticism. You are going to face family and friends and people that you think
00:10:11.760 care about you telling you, you're wasting your time. You're, you're swimming down the wrong fucking
00:10:17.420 river. You know, you're, you're on a pipe dream. You're going to hear all this shit. And dude,
00:10:23.020 that's hard to hear for people that you trust, people that you love, people that you care about.
00:10:26.800 But guys, I'm telling you, you have to fucking cut that shit out of your life. If people are going
00:10:34.280 to be that negative and that, that unsupportive of you, you owe it to yourself to remove that
00:10:43.380 from the situation. Because what's ultimately going to end up happening, guys, is you're going to end up
00:10:48.500 growing older. You're going to miss a ton of opportunities. You're going to get to a point
00:10:53.640 where you look back and you say, God, I could have done this for the last 20 years and I'd be here.
00:10:58.000 And then what's going to happen is you're going to have regret. You're going to become bitter
00:11:01.720 and you're going to feel like you wasted your life guys. And there is absolutely nothing worse than
00:11:07.800 that. Rethink what you think about balance. Audit your circle, control your energy, control your inputs
00:11:20.160 and your external outputs. Are you a good friend? Are you putting out good energy? Are you supporting
00:11:25.920 people that deserve your support? Think about it, guys. Balance isn't balance.