REAL AF with Andy Frisella - Is It Better To Be Famous or Impactful？, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO231

00:00:00.440 I can stack them hunts to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon. Without

00:00:05.340 me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me gotta lose.

00:00:12.340 What is up guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host and I am

00:00:17.640 the motherfucking CEO. Today is Thursday. That means Thursday thunder. If you're new 0.99

00:00:23.720 to the podcast, we do two a week. We do Tuesday, which is like a longer podcast. And then we

00:00:28.080 do a Thursday, which is like karate chop your fucking throat podcast. So it's short. It's 0.99

00:00:34.060 going to hit you right in the face or in the throat or in the wiener or somewhere where 0.99

00:00:38.000 it's going to fucking hurt a whole lot. And that's what we do. All right. Now, what we ask 0.99

00:00:43.040 in return is that you have a conversation with a friend about the podcast. What am I asking

00:00:53.880 for? I'm asking for you. If you get value out of the podcast, if you learn something,

00:00:58.320 if it helped you, if it got you going, I ask that you refer one friend per episode. Okay.

00:01:05.540 I do this for free. I don't ask for money. I don't try to sell you a bunch of shit. I don't

00:01:08.800 even run fucking ads when I could make seven figures a year running ads on this podcast. 1.00

00:01:13.660 I don't because I don't want to pollute your fucking time with me with a bunch of bullshit 1.00

00:01:18.920 garbage. All right. So all I ask is for you to refer a friend. Now, if you make a post 1.00

00:01:24.800 for me, that's great. If you tag somebody in one of my posts, that's great. Tell them

00:01:28.660 why. Tell them what it means to you. Ask, you know, make sure you tell a story with it

00:01:33.140 or whatever it is, because dude, just tagging somebody in my post really doesn't do a fucking 0.96

00:01:36.740 thing. All right. So I'm just asking for a little bit back. That's all. That's my fee. 0.97

00:01:41.400 All right. No money. Just a little bit of sweat equity. By the way, this entire movement

00:01:47.380 is based off of that. You know, uh, we've been consistently a top 10 business podcast,

00:01:52.200 uh, consistently a top 50 podcast for three years now. Um, and it's because what we stand

00:01:58.340 for on this podcast is a lot of what's wrong with society. We're trying to correct 20 years

00:02:06.940 of failed cultural strategy, which is this life is fair. Everybody deserves to win. Everybody

00:02:14.760 deserves anything. Everybody's special. Okay. Everybody gets a trophy. That's not fair.

00:02:22.160 All right. Well, guess what? Life isn't fucking fair motherfucker. And you know what? You're

00:02:26.280 going to have to fucking realize that first and foremost, before you go out and try to 0.99

00:02:29.240 fucking do anything. We are about the truth. We are not idealist. We are realist. We are people 0.99

00:02:35.980 who believe in the work. We are people who believe in producing a result, not talking about

00:02:41.660 producing a result. We are people who believe in being part of the solution, not part of

00:02:46.940 the fucking problem. People who want to be part of the problem can go listen to all the 0.98

00:02:52.640 other motherfuckers podcasts. That's not this. If that's you, turn off your fucking shit right 0.99

00:02:57.180 now. Cause this ain't for you. All right. Now, before I get into what I'm about to get into, 1.00

00:03:04.700 I spent the last week in Hollywood. A lot of you guys don't realize that I have an office

00:03:09.760 in Hollywood, my friend, Dan Fleischman. Um, we do a lot of our influencer and athlete

00:03:16.280 content out of that office. I spend about, I don't know. It used to be a week every month

00:03:23.140 in Hollywood. Uh, but now it's more like a week out of every six weeks out there. Um,

00:03:28.540 and Hollywood is basically the polar opposite of St. Louis, Missouri. If St. Louis is black, 0.94

00:03:37.680 Hollywood is white. Okay. If St. Louis is alpha, Hollywood is the fucking Omega. If St. Louis 0.53

00:03:44.360 is the North pole, Hollywood is the fucking South pole. Okay. If St. Louis is fucking fire, 1.00

00:03:51.160 Hollywood is fucking water. All right. Think about the two extremes that you could possibly 1.00

00:03:59.820 imagine culture wise. Completely different things. Both cool. I'll enjoy both of them,

00:04:05.460 but they're so fucking different. And one of the major differences between the two cultures is that 0.93

00:04:11.540 St. Louis is a very, very salt of the earth. Uh, work hard, keep your head down. Don't,

00:04:21.300 you don't need recognition. You just show up every day and you do your fucking best. And that's why 0.99

00:04:25.700 when you see me wear a South County shirt, that's what that stands for. Okay. South County is the part

00:04:31.640 of St. Louis that I'm from. And probably I would say, in my opinion, now I'm going to have all my

00:04:38.700 other friends, small over St. Louis, get mad at me about this. The hardest working motherfuckers in 0.99

00:04:42.580 St. Louis, South city, probably with them too. But anyway, we are the, these are blue collar folks, 0.99

00:04:49.120 man. These are the people I came from. This is where I come from. This is what I'm about. And it's

00:04:52.680 about who I am. And it's about working hard and producing a result. Okay. But in Hollywood,

00:04:57.640 it's, it's a little bit different in Hollywood. They're more about, you know, recognition and

00:05:04.840 more about being famous and more about being around people who are doing shit. And a lot of 0.99

00:05:10.140 those people who want to be around people who are doing shit, aren't really doing shit. You know, 0.99

00:05:14.440 we were standing around, uh, sitting around, uh, our podcast. Cause I record some podcasts out there

00:05:19.860 in Hollywood. You guys don't realize that because they sound all the same, but sometimes I record

00:05:23.540 these podcasts in Hollywood and, uh, Dan and I, Dan Fleischman and I were sitting around and we were

00:05:29.240 talking about like out in Hollywood, you know, not everybody works. Everybody pretends to work.

00:05:35.760 Everybody has a story about how they work. Everybody has a, has something to like tell you

00:05:39.740 about what they're doing, but not everybody's legitimately doing those things. A lot of those

00:05:43.780 people are just trying to be famous. And it got me thinking about a whole lot regarding our culture.

00:05:49.180 And, and this is going to be the topic of our episode because it got me to think about a really

00:05:54.520 interesting question. And, um, it's a question that I think that if you answer it truly and rightly

00:06:02.300 and wholly, uh, it'll get you straight on what you're doing with your business, your brand, and 0.99

00:06:08.280 really the rest of your fucking life too. If you answer this question correctly, you're going to have 0.91

00:06:13.340 a sense of strength and purpose that other people dream about. It's the kind of strength and purpose

00:06:19.100 other people look at and admire. All right. And it's because you're going to feel good about

00:06:23.360 yourself. So here's the question. Do you want to be famous or do you want your life to leave an

00:06:32.340 impact? Okay. And I want to tell you a story before I get into what I think about this. All right.

00:06:38.780 A lot of you guys know that in, uh, when I was 23 years old, I was stabbed in the face. Um,

00:06:46.240 I was stabbed three times in the face, one time in the back. And, uh, I had 160 stitches in my face.

00:06:53.880 I have permanent nerve damage in my face. Um, and I almost died during the whole ordeal. Well,

00:06:59.900 I'm going to fast forward. If you want to hear the whole story, you go listen to episode one.

00:07:03.020 I tell the exact whole story, but, uh, after that, okay. And you have to, this is,

00:07:09.280 you have to remember, I was 23 years old. Um, I was, I'm in the prime of what's supposed to be like,

00:07:16.960 you know, you're having fun years. And I, I meet this guy and he does something to me and he stabs

00:07:23.460 me in the face and fucks my face up to where like, dude, to this day, you know, if you meet me in 0.98

00:07:28.880 person, the scars are very fucking noticeable. Um, and a lot of you will meet me and be like, Oh, 0.99

00:07:34.620 I don't notice the scars that much bullshit. I know you fucking do. Okay. I'm used to it. You're 1.00

00:07:39.080 not saving my feelings. It is what it is. But afterwards, um, you know, I'm, I go from being

00:07:45.320 this like fun, you know, happy dude, uh, to a guy who's dealing with people all day in business.

00:07:51.860 And those people would always come up to me and they would do one of two things. They would either,

00:07:56.780 my face was swollen the size of a grapefruit. So, uh, they would do one of two things. They would

00:08:02.380 either look at the floor or they would look you right in the face and go, dude, what the fuck 1.00

00:08:07.880 happened to your face? Just like that. I can't tell you how many hundreds of times I heard that 1.00

00:08:12.920 doesn't matter where you are. People just have no fucking like, I don't know what manners if you 0.99

00:08:19.860 want to say it that way about approaching. They, I can't imagine what some people who have like 0.99

00:08:25.360 disfigurements here from people it's, but what, what was even worse was people who looked at the 0.98

00:08:29.220 fucking floor and wouldn't acknowledge you. That was even worse than that. But anyway, dude, I heard 0.99

00:08:33.220 this for, for like two years, man. And, uh, you know, that doesn't make you feel very good. Uh,

00:08:40.700 I got very depressed. Uh, I went through a very, very difficult time. Um, I withdrew. I was,

00:08:48.440 I was drinking literally every day. I was smoking pot literally every day. Uh, I was dealing with

00:08:53.820 major depression. Um, you know, severe suicidal thoughts to the point where like, it was like a

00:09:00.480 daily struggle for me. And, uh, and I was, um, at the grocery store one day and I was going down an

00:09:10.580 aisle and, uh, I was kind of looking at the ground cause that is, that was kind of where I was. I

00:09:15.840 didn't really look at other people at this point. And I got to the end of the aisle and my cart, uh,

00:09:21.960 like T-boned another cart. All right. And I looked up and there was this person standing there who had,

00:09:29.940 uh, no fucking face. All right. And when I say no face, I mean, it was completely burned off. There 0.99

00:09:35.800 was, there was no fucking face there. It was like, uh, two, two eye holes and a nose hole and a mouth. 1.00

00:09:42.960 And, and, uh, and it turns out it was a woman, but she was wearing like one of those like Paddington 1.00

00:09:48.260 bear bucket hats. And I looked at her and I was kind of like, like, holy shit. And that's what I 0.99

00:09:55.240 thought in my head. And she goes, dude, what the fuck happened to your face? And like, dude, I busted 0.99

00:10:02.380 up laughing. Cause I like, we both laugh. Like she was laughing too, because she knew that what I was

00:10:07.100 going through and I knew that she had been through it. And obviously a lot worse than I was.

00:10:11.420 And, uh, you know, we, we sat there and we talked and we had a laugh and, um, uh, I found out that

00:10:19.120 she had been in a plane, a small airplane accident that killed her whole family. And she was the only

00:10:23.340 survivor. Uh, she lost her leg. Her whole body was burned up. Um, and it was honestly one of the most

00:10:32.600 impactful conversations I've had in my entire life because I left that, that store that day,

00:10:38.960 literally my depression, like almost literally cured overnight. Like I'd stopped feeling sorry for

00:10:47.780 myself. And I stopped looking at what I had and focusing on what, how bad it was for me. And, uh,

00:10:54.940 and dude, it changed my life. And it was a 15, 10, 15 minute conversation. And, uh, if you ever hear me

00:11:00.640 speak, I talk, I tell this story a lot in person. Um, and I guess like the main point, you know, I didn't

00:11:07.840 even get her name. And the main point I'm trying to make here is she left a huge, huge impact on my

00:11:13.780 life. And I can honestly say, I can honestly say that if I hadn't had that conversation, I don't

00:11:19.940 think I would be alive. I really don't. I think I would have killed myself. Um, and that's the first

00:11:25.480 time I've ever said that, but I mean it. Uh, and, and you know, here's the thing. And as a result of

00:11:33.160 that conversation, every time you read one of my posts or download this podcast or see something,

00:11:39.500 see me speak or do something, she's leaving an impact on you. Okay. Cause I wouldn't even fucking 0.98

00:11:45.300 be here and I don't even know her name and you don't know her name. She's not famous, but do you 0.97

00:11:51.600 think she cares that she's famous? Fuck? No, she doesn't care. I think, and I know from having that 1.00

00:11:57.340 conversation that she was very satisfied and very comfortable with the person who she is, even

00:12:04.340 though she was badly burned, even though, you know, she had had all these tragedies happen to you. I

00:12:09.460 don't think she probably isn't even on social media and she could have zero followers until the day she 1.00

00:12:15.660 dies and she won't give a fuck. And the reason she's not going to give a fuck is because she knows 1.00

00:12:22.020 that she's lived an impactful life. I got that sense off of her just from talking to her. Like 0.99

00:12:28.280 she knew what she was doing. She knew she was helping me. And somehow I don't God willing or

00:12:35.700 whatever you want to say, or whatever you believe in the universe, God, I don't know. You don't know

00:12:40.260 either, but whatever you believe in a higher power caused us to meet that day. And she somehow knew

00:12:47.100 where I was. I know she knew where I was at the point of what I was going through. I could just,

00:12:53.180 I can't explain to you how much I know that. Um, and I know that if someone knows that much,

00:13:01.060 that they're comfortable living the life that they're living. And if the only person who knows

00:13:07.960 it are her and God, she's cool with it. Okay. So let me ask you again, do you want to be famous

00:13:14.160 or do you want to be impactful? Cause I am so fucking sick of everything in our culture 0.95

00:13:20.940 being motivated by recognition. I am so sick of people thinking that their entire worth as a person 0.97

00:13:27.600 is how many followers they have and how many comments they get and how many, uh, you know,

00:13:32.800 collabs they do with other people. I'm sick of people feeling great about themselves. If they build

00:13:38.480 their following and shitty about themselves, if they get unfollowed, like it's ridiculous. 0.99

00:13:43.040 And I have a feeling that a lot of you are living in that fucking tornado right now. Okay. It's not 0.99

00:13:49.920 even a tornado. It's a fucking drain. You know, that little drain at the bottom of the bathtub when 1.00

00:13:54.780 you pull the fucking plug out the little whirlpool or whatever the fuck that is that used to stick 0.99

00:13:59.120 GI Joe's in. That's what the fuck you're living in with this social media bullshit. Okay. And if that's 1.00

00:14:04.640 you, then there's a great chance that your motives as a person are misaligned. You want to be

00:14:11.100 famous, not impactful. And that means it's ultimately about you and not offering any value

00:14:18.120 to anybody else in the world. And if that's the case, do you ever think you're going to feel

00:14:22.220 satisfied? Do you ever think that you're going to be at peace with yourself? I can tell you for sure.

00:14:29.120 The answer is no, because how can you be at peace with yourself? If you're a selfish shit bag 1.00

00:14:34.500 that only cares about how other people recognize you, you can't be because here's the reality. If 1.00

00:14:40.540 you are impactful, there's a chance you're going to become famous. But in my experience, the truly

00:14:46.580 elite people don't even give a shit about that. The point for them is to be impactful. They don't 0.98

00:14:51.100 give a fuck about how many social media followers or how many comments or how they're not posting to 1.00

00:14:56.540 get a million fucking views. They're posting to help people or impact people in a certain way. 1.00

00:15:04.580 Don't buy in to the, I want to be the next Kim Kardashian bullshit. Okay. You trying to be her, 0.98

00:15:13.120 you trying to be that person, you, it's going to make people keep you down anyway, because they're 0.99

00:15:18.280 going to look at you and they're going to say, Oh, you just want to be fucking famous. And they're not 0.95

00:15:22.080 going to fucking support you. Okay. Just because you have some big titties and a nice ass and this 1.00

00:15:27.980 and that, you know what? A million motherfuckers have that shit, not just you. So what makes you 1.00

00:15:35.140 different? What's going to get you where you want to go? What matters? I can tell you right now,

00:15:43.200 you people out there chasing this fame, chasing the next popularity contest, trying to sit at the 1.00

00:15:49.640 cool motherfuckers table at lunch. When you're 30 years old, you people are doing it fucking wrong. 1.00

00:15:55.720 We have an opportunity through social media. We have an opportunity through the network and the 0.98

00:16:01.360 fucking technology that we have to make a tremendous impact on people. But only if you put yourself 0.97

00:16:08.880 behind that cause, not putting yourself in front of that cause. It's time to get off the hamster

00:16:16.120 wheel. It's time to switch up what your motives are. Fame for the sake of fame. It's bullshit.

00:16:22.840 It's far more satisfying and far more effective to be impactful and to stand for something and to 0.99

00:16:30.760 have a message that people respect. And by the way, I'm not shaming on girls with big tits and ass like, 1.00

00:16:39.060 dude, fuck, you know, that's, if that's what you got and that's what you want to show, 1.00

00:16:43.080 that's awesome. If it's worse for you, that's awesome. But I know so many people and I'm, 1.00

00:16:47.960 and for guys, it's the same. If you have abs in your physique and that's what it is. But if that's

00:16:52.420 all you got, if that's all you have and you don't have something that helps educate people or inspire

00:16:59.140 people and impact people, you're going to feel fucking lonely. You're going to feel alone. You're

00:17:05.260 going to feel like your life's not making a difference. And I bet a lot of you listening already feel that

00:17:10.460 way. You're already starting to feel the shallowness. You're already starting to feel

00:17:15.620 the emptiness. You're already starting to feel the insignificance. And the reason that you feel

00:17:20.840 those things is because you're not putting others before yourself. It's a fucking drain. It's something 1.00

00:17:28.880 that's going to suck you down and take you away because the truth is, is there's a next big thing.

00:17:35.340 There's a next hot thing. And no matter how smart you think you are or how well you think you have

00:17:43.020 the game figured out, nobody stays famous for, for the sake of being famous. You might have 15 minutes,

00:17:51.120 you might have this, and some people have their 15 fucking minutes and hang on to it for a hundred 0.99

00:17:56.080 years. And those are the most miserable fucking people on earth. You have to understand that your 1.00

00:18:02.980 life satisfaction, your legacy, what you stand for is going to come from you putting others first.

00:18:10.940 It's going to come from you seeking to be impactful, not seeking to get more likes or more comments.

00:18:19.820 And by the way, this is tactical advice. This isn't just, oh, moral advice, me on my fucking soapbox. 0.98

00:18:28.380 Let's say you're the most best looking dude or the best looking woman. We're becoming desensitized to 0.98

00:18:36.220 those things as a society, because it's, we're, we're shoved in our faces all the time, all the

00:18:43.200 content of all these beautiful people. So what is separating you? What is the thing that's going to

00:18:49.400 help you grow and help you this? Well, here's the fucking thing, motherfucker. It's doing the right 1.00

00:18:55.720 thing. Be the person who stands for something. Be the person with a message besides your looks. Be the

00:19:01.720 person with someone who can impact people and help people and bring people up instead of just saying,

00:19:07.620 hey, look at me. Hey, look at my body. Hey, look at the shit I got. That's how you should be using

00:19:15.300 social. That's how you're going to become successful. And by the way, that's how you're going to become

00:19:21.280 fulfilled, which is more important than anything, because guys, there is nothing, nothing worse 0.99

00:19:27.200 than going your whole life and then being like, fuck, I did it wrong. Because that's the path some 0.97

00:19:34.500 of you guys are on. You're getting caught in the whirlwind. You're getting caught in the drain

00:19:38.160 and you can feel it. You're already feeling empty. You're already feeling lonely. You're all,

00:19:43.980 yeah, you go to the party. Yeah, you go to this event. Yeah, you do that. But what is it?

00:19:48.900 It's a bunch of motherfuckers just like you trying to be fucking famous. 1.00

00:19:54.380 That's not impact. And it's not going to be fame either because you don't have anything unique to 1.00

00:20:00.760 offer. Think about how you're going to impact people. Think about what you can offer. You have

00:20:06.400 a story. You have skills. You have values that you can help other people learn or cultivate or use to

00:20:17.060 live a better life. And when you do that, that's when you start to feel fulfilled. That's when you

00:20:23.480 start to feel great about yourself. That's when the emptiness that you feel starts to go away.

00:20:30.940 A lot of people ask me all the time, Andy, why do you spend so much time on your captions?

00:20:35.500 Why do you spend so much time doing this podcast? You know why? Because it feels fucking good.

00:20:40.800 I'm not making money off of this shit. I do it. Not because I get likes on my fucking Instagram or 1.00

00:20:48.320 not because I get downloads on my podcast. Yeah, that's fucking cool, but that's not why I do it. 0.98

00:20:54.260 The reason I do it is because I see people changing. I get emails day by day by day about people changing 0.88

00:21:03.600 their lives, changing their income, changing the way their family works or the way their job worked or the

00:21:09.280 career they're on or the business they're in. I get those testimonials unsolicited every fucking day. 0.98

00:21:16.900 And that's why I do this because I know what I'm doing makes a fucking difference. And you know why 0.99

00:21:21.620 I am confident and you know why I feel good about myself? It's because I know I'm giving more than I'm

00:21:29.040 fucking taking and I know it. So if you're one of these people who's getting sucked in to society right now, 0.96

00:21:36.800 you're developing and attributing your worth to likes and comments and shares.

00:21:44.260 Okay. If you're one of these people who has to go to the next party or the next thing or the next thing

00:21:50.080 to constantly feel good, wake the fuck up and start realizing that you're, you're not treating the 0.92

00:21:59.260 cause you're treating the symptom. And if you want to treat the cause and you want to feel good and you 0.52

00:22:04.840 want to live a great life that you're proud of and that you can look back and say, you know what? 1.00

00:22:08.980 I did the fucking shit right versus fuck. I did it wrong. You got to start putting other people 1.00

00:22:15.180 before you. You've got to start looking to make an impact. You've got to stop chasing fame for the

00:22:20.820 sake of being fucking famous. And by the way, there's nothing wrong with being famous. 0.99

00:22:25.640 You know what? People recognize me all over the place. I'm far from famous, but I get recognized.

00:22:32.620 And you know what? That's cool. I like it. I'm not going to say I don't like it. It's cool,

00:22:36.320 but I don't do it for that. I do it for the guy who writes me an email about, you know, how he was

00:22:44.420 making, uh, $20,000 and couldn't pay his fucking bills. And now he's making a hundred. I do it for the 0.98

00:22:50.420 guy who, uh, you know, was about to get divorced and upset with his situation at home, who was able

00:22:55.960 to fix it. And now he's happy. I do it for shit like that. I don't do it because I want people to

00:23:02.460 recognize me. And a lot of you guys say, Oh, Andy, you're so real. You know why I'm fucking real

00:23:07.240 because I'm not chasing fucking fame and you fucking know it. You want to come across as real? You want 0.99

00:23:14.700 to come across as authentic? Then be authentic and be real and put other people before you.

00:23:21.260 And until you do that, you're not going to fucking see what you want to see. You're not going to feel 0.90

00:23:26.500 the way you want to feel. You're not going to be fulfilled and you're going to be empty on the

00:23:30.860 fucking inside for the rest of your life. 1.00

00:23:44.700 Bye. 1.00

00:23:45.700 Bye.

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - April 19, 2018

Is It Better To Be Famous or Impactful？, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO231

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