Overcoming The Fears That Keep Us Ordinary, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO314
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
197.55527
Summary
In this episode of the MFCEO Project, I sit down with DJ DJ God and talk about his 75 Day Diet Challenge and how he is doing on it. We talk about the challenges of dieting and how to stay on track with your goals.
Transcript
00:00:00.360
I can stack them hundreds to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon.
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Without me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me gotta lose.
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What is up, guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO.
00:00:19.400
Guys, as not always, but I always say always, joining me is my amazing, handsome, buff podcast host that you guys have a million nicknames for, but he has more nicknames than you.
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I believe. Well, it's going actually really well.
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Well, there's only one way. That's the key thing about 75 hard. It's either going or it isn't going.
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Yeah. Although, you know those guys who ask you little questions that drive you crazy?
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Yeah, well, I actually have a question, and I'm asking you on the air so that you moderate your response.
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So I am very good about keeping to my diet, right?
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Here's the problem I have. The way that I manifest stress is I lose my appetite.
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Yeah. Bro, listen, you got to stay on top of that shit.
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Because you're what's called a hard gainer, man.
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You're naturally a very thin guy who has trouble putting on muscle, and that takes even more distance.
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Like everybody always wants to talk about how hard it is to lose weight.
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Listen, I've been in this business for 21 years now.
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It is honestly much harder for someone like you to get where they want to go than it is for someone to lose weight.
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Because it's ā well, I won't say it's harder.
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I will say it requires the exact same amount of discipline.
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You know, a lot of guys who are thin or people who are thin, they want to get weight.
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They go out and they eat this big, giant meal once or twice a day, and they're like,
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oh, dude, I ate two Big Macs and two large fries, but you didn't eat anything else the rest of the day.
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So it takes a lot of discipline to constantly eat when you're not ā you have to eat by the clock, not when you're hungry.
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And the truth is, as you well know, when you do discipline yourself to eat regularly, you do end up having more of an appetite.
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And so that's what I got to ā well, all right, well, I'll start over then.
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I know ā listen, I'm keeping myself to a diet plan.
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This isn't a violation that you start over for.
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Like I'm not ā this isn't something ā like there's people out there ā when you have a diet and you say like you're supposed to eat 2,500 calories a day, no one really actually hits 2,500.
00:03:07.620
But it's what's the course ā the overall body of work that you're doing for the next 75 days, if you shoot for that target number and you're around it, you're going to get the result.
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So, dude, just make ā just get focused on that.
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This is the difference between doing it and doing it perfectly.
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And if you do it perfectly, the results are fucking massive.
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I almost willingly started over because I do take seriously what you say about, like, the first five to seven days, I was doing everything.
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The intent starts to grow as you start to progress.
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Like, in some ways, I feel like the first five days just happened to be not super busy days for me.
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But going back real quick before you get into whatever you're going to talk about.
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It is interesting when people ā not necessarily people like me because right now, it's not like I'm, like, crazy skinny.
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But when people grow up and they're really super skinny, they don't get any sympathy from people.
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But, dude, they have the same problems overweight people have.
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And I actually think that this is a legitimate thing.
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It's like people who their whole life they've been, like, crazy good looking.
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And so nobody takes them seriously as people because they just kind of look at, like, women deal with this, you know?
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And ā but try to let a woman complain about the fact that she's always judged because she's so good looking.
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I have a few women ā there's a few women in Arte who are very successful in the Arte Syndicate.
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They're like, dude, we feel like no matter how successful we get, people don't take our concerns, our shit serious.
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I used to be someone who was like, yeah, that's bullshit.
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Like, I've seen the way people interact with successful women versus men.
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I've seen the way people treat my own wife versus the way they treat me.
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You know, what's funny is my ā you know, Emily runs Arte and she runs my personal brand.
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And these people will email in to get me to speak or on their show and they don't realize they're talking to my wife.
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And it's like ā it's funny because it really ā first of all, it gives you a real good idea of what kind of people they are.
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They're the kind of people who fucking, you know, treat waitresses and waiters like shit, you know, and look down on them.
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Because, dude, they ā and it's the quickest way to get me to not do anything for you.
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You know, if you treat my people bad, which obviously ā
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Remember that member who was kind of snooty with us?
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Like ā and, dude, you know, getting into a little bit different topic of what we're talking about, but, you know, I feel like society is getting better about that.
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But the truth is, man, is there are some bad-ass fucking women out there that are kicking ass, right, that nobody ever hears about.
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Maybe they're not ā they don't need to put everything on a social.
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And the truth is, I wish some of these women would really step up in social media because, dude, I honestly feel like a lot of them are better entrepreneurs than the men.
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It's really ā you know, I learned so much stuff from the successful women that are around me and see things a different way and see the world in a different way and a business in a different way.
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It's just ā you know, it's like what we're talking about.
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You know, you don't really understand that there's people out there ā because I never really looked at, right?
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Like, dude, I just don't ā I don't look at someone and think successful woman or successful black man or successful black woman.
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I just look at motherfuckers and think, fuck, it's successful.
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But, dude, there's not a lot of ā there's people out there that don't do that.
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I actually think business is the one area of human life where it really is a meritocracy.
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Like, people don't care if you're black, white, or whatever.
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I'm going to get into the politics here, but I think if you're ā I don't care who you are.
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If you're a woman and you know how to build a company, you're going to get paid.
00:08:00.780
You know, like right now we have so many ā we have such ā so many social movements for, you know, empowerment of this group or that group.
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Look, man, if you want to get empowered, go out and fucking beat everybody.
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If you think you need to be equal, go out there and prove that you ain't equal.
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And not because you're worse, because they're not equal to you.
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You know, that's the mentality that needs to be taken.
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It's not, hey, we need special attention because we're disadvantaged.
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You just got to be that much better and shove it down motherfuckers' throats.
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All the women I know that are winning agree with that.
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Do you remember the guy that we paid a ton of money to come in and say, are you guys fired up?
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Guys, we're kind of going down memory lane here.
00:09:17.860
Dude, we won't say who because he's a good dude, but a friend of ours kind of recommended
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this guy, and in fairness to our friend, I mean, we thought this guy was going to be awesome.
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This is like literally, we had a local conference.
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Andy was a keynote speaker at this local conference.
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And we hired a guy that was going to be the emcee, and apparently he was supposedly this
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great announcer, the quote unquote million dollar smile.
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I'm going to text him today and make fun of him.
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Like, it looked on paper, it looked like this guy was, but guys, this is what happened.
00:10:08.300
Remember, this is, Andy Fursell is the keynote speaker, right?
00:10:23.760
So, this guy gets up, and we're waiting for the, you know, we're waiting for like the
00:10:29.960
And he comes up and he goes, are you guys fired up?
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This motherfucker needed an intro when he was supposed to be the guy introing us.
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We should actually say who it is, because he's a great dude.
00:11:02.520
That was back in the day when we were trying to figure shit out.
00:11:05.000
But back in the day, very early on, we had a third co-host named Ben Newman.
00:11:17.760
He's the performance coach for University of Alabama.
00:11:20.840
More importantly, a bigger contender, Kansas State University.
00:11:32.700
So, but no, I mean, he didn't know any better, but he came up to me.
00:11:39.740
Me, you, and Ben were all sitting at the same table.
00:11:43.040
And then when Ben confronted him, I remember this.
00:11:47.120
When Ben confronted him, he said, oh, Benny, are you serious?
00:11:59.280
All I remember is that Ben had to intro our intro guy and had to say, because we were
00:12:05.400
sitting on the side of the stage, and I remember the guy telling Ben, he's like, you got to
00:12:14.300
First of all, why would you want to spend a million dollars on your smile?
00:12:16.780
Bro, that was like the second event I ever did in my life.
00:12:20.680
Like, you know, of course, I'm trying to pretend like I know what the fuck I'm doing.
00:12:28.080
But like, dude, the funny thing was, is, oh, dude, it was great.
00:12:40.900
He said, he kept on saying condone, but he was mispronouncing it as condom.
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Or it was some word that he was mispronouncing, and it sounded exactly like condom or semen or
00:13:04.440
Like, actually, it's weird reminiscing about that.
00:13:14.040
Because now, you know, we go to events, and it's like a pretty big fucking deal.
00:13:18.700
You know, like, we're like standing on the side, like all of us.
00:13:26.780
But like, dude, I can remember standing on the side of the stage.
00:13:31.460
And we got, like, the sheet of paper, and we're standing on the side of the stage, and
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So Ben gets up there, and he's like, the man with the million-dollar smile, like introing
00:13:57.020
Dude, I think we printed out banners on your copy machine.
00:14:03.780
They were pieces of paper we printed off on the fucking, on the copy machine.
00:14:13.980
To this day, it's one of my favorite podcasts we've ever done is-
00:14:19.660
Yeah, 107, if you haven't heard, 107 is Win the Day.
00:14:25.160
And Ben is actually in that one, I believe, yeah?
00:14:27.260
But what I was talking about was, there's another one that's early on.
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It's called, you have to be bad before you're a badass.
00:14:41.140
There has to be a process, and you have to be willing to suck before you're just like-
00:14:49.580
Like, the reason that we've been delayed so long today is because I literally spent the
00:14:55.940
last two hours talking to a friend of mine who has a company here in St. Louis, okay?
00:15:26.280
In the office talking to him on the phone, you know?
00:15:28.100
We were like his first customer at the supplement super stores.
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We sold his peppers and marketed him as like a healthy alternative, which it is.
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But he's, you know, he's, dude, he's in the beginning stages.
00:15:45.340
And he wanted our help and we're sitting there talking and we're getting it.
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He's telling us this and he's telling us that and he's telling us this.
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And finally, I dig down to the deepest root of the issue he's having.
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And he's like, bro, I just don't feel like I'm worthy to fucking be successful.
00:16:14.080
Which, by the way, guys, I know I interrupt people.
00:16:21.020
Dude, you haven't interrupted me in over a year.
00:16:25.760
That's because I've been trying to be better about it.
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Your hands down have been like massive improvement.
00:16:34.160
Well, I'm trying to, you know, like I get excited.
00:16:39.160
I start talking and people, you know, people take that the wrong way.
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They take it as I'm being rude when in reality it's passion.
00:16:46.160
See, honestly, not to get off on this tangent, but that's the way my family is.
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And I told you the other day, like I'm pretty docile on this show.
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But I told, I told you the other day, like I raised my voice with somebody in our extended
00:17:06.560
I know you're like that because you tolerate me.
00:17:09.800
But if anybody's raised by Easterners, no offense, Easterners, but actually like kudos to you
00:17:17.280
But I'm not a Midwesterner when it comes to my.
00:17:22.580
Dude, everybody thinks I'm from New York or they're thinking I'm from the East Coast somewhere.
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My wife and I were like in tears laughing about this.
00:17:38.360
Literally this person went and told somebody else that they thought I had an anger problem.
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And that I was an unsafe and potentially violent person.
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So I was telling Tony, I was like, dude, I'm like, Tony, first of all, that's how we all feel.
00:18:04.440
All of us feel like we don't know what we're doing.
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Like, I can remember back when I was just getting started.
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When I say just getting started, I mean 10 years.
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Bro, I felt like the biggest fucking fraud there was.
00:18:23.380
I felt like any day I'm going to get exposed for not knowing what the fuck he's doing.
00:18:30.120
And everybody's going to say he's full of shit.
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And my whole world will be crumbled down on top of my head, and it'll be over.
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If you're listening to this fucking podcast, and you don't feel that way, good for you.
00:18:48.000
But I bet there's times that you do actually feel that way.
00:18:50.960
And I was telling him, dude, you know, I can remember, dude, this is fucked up.
00:18:55.320
But I always think about, like, really weird shit.
00:18:59.720
I used to, like, think that eventually someone somewhere who I found was credible in my space, right?
00:19:09.140
At the time when I started in business, it was guys like Bill Phillips, all right?
00:19:13.180
Who is a, I mean, he's probably changed more lives than nearly anybody on this planet.
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Jeff and Eric Hillman, who owned Europa Sports, who became great friends of ours and still are great friends of ours.
00:19:31.880
But these dudes, like, I used to always think that I had to have their approval in order for me to be successful.
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Which I couldn't get to Bill because he was so big and I was so little.
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Probably how people might feel about me now, you know, where they're like, they're like, I can't, you know, you know what I'm saying?
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Like, it's just, there's a lot of space in between.
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And I used to think that if they didn't believe in me or if, you know, whoever's successful out there in business didn't believe in me, I wasn't going to make it.
00:20:15.840
It means like, you know, when one rapper has the young rapper and the older rapper says, this is the new guy coming up.
00:20:23.740
And then everybody follows the new guy coming up.
00:20:34.820
But it's something that we think is real when we're first starting out.
00:20:38.580
We think that we've got to have so-and-so's approval or our parents' approval or our teacher's approval or our aunt and uncle's approval.
00:20:48.200
And if we don't get everybody's approval, there's no chance that we could be successful.
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And guys, I'm here to tell you, not only is that false and you don't need anybody's, what's really happening here is you're convincing yourself.
00:21:06.380
You're convincing yourself that you don't have what it takes.
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You're making up conversations in your brain about what might be said if you do what you're thinking about doing, which ultimately creates a situation where you are hating on yourself.
00:21:23.840
And because you hate on yourself, you don't do anything because you say that everybody else is hating you when it's really you.
00:21:36.000
And, dude, I'm talking to this guy who is, you know, he's got great products.
00:21:41.180
He's scared to death because, dude, he's a little older, man.
00:21:44.560
And I'm like, look, brother, fucking Colonel Sanders became one of the wealthiest people on the earth at the age of plus 60 plus.
00:21:53.520
And you guys who are older right now and you're thinking, I don't have the time.
00:21:57.920
We live in an age where there's instant everything.
00:22:05.200
30 years ago when other people were trying to build shit, you had to fucking send a letter there and then wait on the leather to come back.
00:22:13.340
Like the speed at which we can collapse time from, let's say, the previous era where we say 10, 20 years where you can collapse it down to, say, five years.
00:22:26.680
Because, fuck, if you're 50 years old or 55 years old, in five years you could be living a completely different fucking life.
00:22:36.560
So I want to add something about that because I love the point you're making here.
00:22:39.860
When I was a pastor, I used to tell people, like, especially when they were really old and they had kind of made a dumpster fire of their life and they were like, oh, it's too late to really change anything.
00:22:50.500
I said, no, I would used to tell them, no, not all days are equal in the hands of God.
00:22:55.240
And what that means is that I know guys that basically were crappy husbands, crappy fathers, but something happened and they made a change.
00:23:05.360
And I know a guy that, like, made a massive change in his life.
00:23:12.520
And I was talking about that with somebody and they were like, oh, man, that's a bummer that he only lived one year the way he was supposed to live all along.
00:23:19.620
And I said, yeah, but here's what's kind of amazing.
00:23:21.420
If you would have asked his son, who I was really good friends with, he says the only thing he remembers about his dad was that one good year.
00:23:30.420
Like, all the previous years were erased because of all the good that he did in that one year.
00:23:39.820
And people need to realize that, like, time is, like I said, not all days are equal in the hands of God.
00:23:47.000
I mean, God can do amazing things in one day that would have normally taken a whole year or even a whole lifetime.
00:23:54.960
And in the same way, people need to press forward and overcome this fear that, you know, that they're running out of time.
00:24:02.940
Because as you well know, you can labor for 15 years in business and all of a sudden within the space of six weeks and eight weeks make ridiculous amounts of money because everything finally comes to a head.
00:24:16.060
You know, that's what people that I think we talked about this a few weeks ago.
00:24:19.840
That's what people don't understand about the compounding effect of creating skill sets.
00:24:26.900
Like, dude, when I say like when I say and we have to be careful as as people that other people look look to for advice.
00:24:34.820
Like I talked to Gary V about this all the time.
00:24:37.200
You know, it's very hard for us to say information.
00:24:43.800
And for everybody to understand the context, you see what I'm saying?
00:24:48.160
So when I say, dude, I fucking grind my ass off for 15 years, 10 years with barely any pay, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:24:59.020
But what you have to realize is that was in a different era.
00:25:02.060
That was in the era of zero social media, zero, zero useful Internet.
00:25:14.040
You certainly couldn't fucking communicate the way we could communicate today.
00:25:18.020
So all of those things collapse the time frame.
00:25:27.660
And here's what the other thing that nobody really ever talks about, which is the truth.
00:25:50.700
Our ability to have resources and reinvest in our company becomes a thing.
00:25:56.040
Then what happens is since you started with zero, it might like for me, it took me 10 years to get the ball moving.
00:26:04.680
But once I got the ball moving and I started to get some income and I started to have some relationships like the ones I mentioned before, now all of a sudden I'm able to do what took me 10 years in one year.
00:26:19.400
Dude, I make more money, more money in a fucking month now than my company sold in the first 10 fucking years.
00:26:27.380
Not made in the 10 years, sold in the 10 years.
00:26:39.280
Your progress is going to accelerate with your growth of skills and resources and connections.
00:26:47.660
So you, when this is, dude, this is, this is real shit.
00:26:50.940
This is why people fail because they don't want to pay, they pay that price for five, six years.
00:26:57.200
And they finally get to where they're making 60, 70, a hundred thousand dollars.
00:27:01.400
And they're like, fuck, this is how hard it is.
00:27:05.180
How hard is it going to be to make a million dollars?
00:27:08.000
And so even though they're making a hundred thousand, they think the same way they thought
00:27:16.820
They're like, dude, this is going to take me another five years to get to 200,000.
00:27:23.260
I think that kills more fucking ambition and more success than any other thing.
00:27:28.920
It's people not understanding that your efforts compound and your, your, your investments
00:27:34.380
compound, even your time investments, your money investments, your connection investments,
00:27:38.620
the investments you make in your team, that shit compounds.
00:27:42.120
And when it all comes together, man, it creates this whirlwind of a machine.
00:27:50.440
And I, listen, I don't want to pick on your friend, but I think there's another aspect of
00:27:55.160
You always say that early on in your business, um, when things weren't going well, you and Chris
00:28:02.100
What if we, what if we never make any money off of this?
00:28:08.720
And so I, I, what I perceive in him is this, this, this idea that once he starts making
00:28:18.640
And I told him, I said, Tony, I said, when you first started, when you first started doing
00:28:23.820
your peppers, cause dude, it was a one man show.
00:28:37.780
Where I first saw him doing his peppers, you know what I was doing?
00:28:42.480
We were working a bodybuilding show at a table.
00:28:46.820
So I'm talking to him and he's like, dude, you're right.
00:28:51.360
And I'm like, Tony, it isn't anything more than the basics.
00:29:00.080
I met him at a fucking bodybuilding show where he's sampling peppers and I'm sampling protein
00:29:10.260
Like all you motherfuckers out there, you think, oh dude, Andy's just this rich dude who
00:29:14.440
fucking listens to trap music and takes pictures of his fucking cars.
00:29:23.440
I still do that shit that I did back in fucking 1999.
00:29:30.420
And so what these people don't understand is that the basics are the business.
00:29:37.680
When you get away from the basics, when you get off track.
00:29:39.880
But I was talking to him exactly what I said, exactly what you just said.
00:29:45.000
I said, Tony, when you go do two tastings on a Saturday, when everybody else is watching
00:29:53.000
football and all your buddies are drinking beer because he loves Notre Dame football.
00:29:57.020
When everybody's doing that stuff and you work two events, say two tastings for two hours
00:30:04.460
each and you talk to a hundred different people that day.
00:30:10.780
And I said, that's because the work makes you happy.
00:30:16.620
Dude, the happiest I am is after the hardest I work.
00:30:21.680
And it's so counterintuitive to the way people want to live because they're taught, dude,
00:30:35.620
Maybe you should just assume that if you keep doing the work, you're going to be where you
00:30:44.240
How would you feel stress wise if you knew that you would be where you want to be 20
00:30:51.900
And I'm telling you the way to be happy while you're doing it is to take pride in the daily
00:30:57.220
work that you do and look at other motherfuckers who are doing the shit that you quote unquote
00:31:01.760
are supposed to be doing, like sitting on a couch Saturday, eating a fucking Papa John's
00:31:20.640
Men are the dudes who pass that shit up to provide for their families and the people
00:31:26.320
they care about and create jobs and create the shit.
00:31:34.700
I'm not saying you can't do it once in a while.
00:31:36.860
I'm just saying if you're going to build your happiness on something, build it on something
00:31:42.080
that actually makes you happy, not on something that society says is supposed to make you happy.
00:31:50.640
Guys, as so often happens, this is not even close to what we originally had planned.
00:31:59.040
But, you know, the Holy Spirit led a different direction.
00:32:01.940
And I just want to recap because that's what I do.
00:32:04.660
Really, we ended up, the way I would sum it up is we ended up talking about fear.
00:32:08.480
Fear that you don't have what it takes and you need validation.
00:32:15.900
Secondly is fear that you're running out of time.
00:32:22.080
As I said, not all days are equal in the hands of God.
00:32:26.480
So just trust to put in the effort and the crop.
00:32:30.340
And then finally, I would say the fear of basically there's some magical formula or secret sauce that you don't know.
00:32:42.880
You stick with the basics and you'll be the best in the business, basically.
00:32:46.280
So the only other thing I have to attend to is Iā
00:32:50.380
And the fourth point is be cognizant of how your success is going to accelerate.
00:32:55.520
Don't think that because it took you five years or seven years to get to an $80,000 position in your career that you're not going to get to a $280,000 position in the next four.
00:33:07.700
Because right now you're more skilled, you're more connected, you have more resources, and you have to understand that with the society that we live in and how fast it can be for us to communicate, that time frame can collapse.
00:33:20.580
So your parents are going to say, no, I'm going to build a million-dollar business, and you sold $10,000 this month.
00:33:28.120
Or I'm going to build a $10 million business, and you sold $10,000 this month.
00:33:31.920
Your parents are going to say, it's going to take you 20 years.
00:33:35.060
But what will take you 20 years, and this is the dangerous part for you guys, is to fully understand how to fucking do it.
00:33:44.660
The money's going to come before the understanding for a lot of these people.
00:33:47.980
So they're going to get rich, they're going to make money.
00:33:54.320
So understand that while the success might not take as long, keeping success is going to become more and more rare because of how fast it can come right now.
00:34:07.000
So guys, the long-awaited winners of the MFCEO Review Contest.
00:34:17.240
We wish we could fly out more people, but, you know, there are logistical issues to consider.
00:34:23.840
Then I want to say something really quick about the last winner because this is pretty darn cool.
00:34:32.020
Carissa, I am really sorry if I'm mispronouncing your last name, but it could be Lepore or Lepore or Lepore.
00:34:46.560
And the third winner is a man named Shan Johnson.
00:34:51.320
And this is really interesting because I got to read this to you, dude.
00:34:54.440
Do you remember the guy, remember when we had that Gary Vee event here?
00:35:03.420
There was a guy who was, I'm pretty sure he was from Texas and he was into, his business was pools, you know, like swimming pools.
00:35:13.380
He asked some question about it and Gary kind of like jumped all over him and you actually cut in and you're like, no, wait a minute.
00:35:25.900
But he says in this review, I found Andy when my company did 8.3 million in the previous 12 months.
00:35:39.120
18 months later, applying the insights of the MFCO Project podcast and following your IG, he now does 8.3 million a month.
00:36:03.340
So I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's the same guy that came up here for, we'll find out.
00:36:15.020
So, Carissa, Allison, and Shan, we'll be in touch, but don't hesitate to email us, too, because I get a lot of emails.
00:36:32.160
If you got some valuable content, valuable information out of this podcast that you think is going to help, if it gave you a boost, if it gave you some new ideas, dude, just talk about us, man.