Setting the Record Straight on Success, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO14
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 20 minutes
Words per minute
197.52774
Harmful content
Misogyny
11
sentences flagged
Toxicity
215
sentences flagged
Hate speech
29
sentences flagged
Summary
In this episode of the MF CEO Project, we have a special guest, Big Jim. Big Jim is the original MFCE Dad, the sperm donor, and a former pastor. He joins us to talk about a variety of topics, including the end of the world, a blood moon, and much more.
Transcript
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Hey guys, what's up? Welcome to the MF CEO Project. I'm Andy and I am the motherfucking
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CEO. I'm here with my co-host, Mr. Vaughn Kohler, the pastor. What's up, dude?
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Former pastor, but yeah, thanks. The pastor, Vaughn. Once a pastor, always a pastor. That's
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right. And my good friend, Ben Newman, speaker extraordinaire. What's up, dude? What's going
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on, Andy? How are you? Hey, man, I'm fired up, ready to go. Yeah, me too. We have a special
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guest in the podcast here today, the OG, the original MFCE dad. My dad, Big Jim, what's
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up? What's up, though? I'm the original sperm donor, I think. There's never been any.
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DNA stuff. Some days I think he is, and some days I think he's not. I'm not sure. Some
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days, maybe. We've talked about him a couple times on the podcast. I want to get him on
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here, and he's going to be chiming in with probably some stupid shit, probably some informative
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shit. Like father, like son, huh? So you'll see where I get it from. Anyhow, let's start
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with the question of the day. Vaughn. Yes. Former pastor. Yes. All right. Dude, is the
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world ending? Are we coming? Is the world coming to an end? Because I just saw this
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thing. We're having like four blood moons. Yeah. Okay. Friday the 13th is Halloween this
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year. The last time it was on Friday the 13th was 666 days. Wow. Or 666 years before that.
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Where'd you hear that? Dude, I read it. It's got to be true. It was online. Clearly. Yeah,
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clearly. All right. Then we have people fucking shooting each other on the fucking highway this
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morning, national news. We've got all this racial fucking bullshit going on, you know, between
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people who are supposed to get along and be normal humans. We have, you know.
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Caitlyn Jenner. I mean, yeah. We've got Caitlyn Jenner. We've just got all this crazy shit going
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on. I mean, what I need to know from a religious expert, which is why we have you here, is the
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world coming to an end? I have no idea, but I will tell you this, whether it is or not,
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it shouldn't have. I mean, you should live the way that you're supposed to live, whether it's
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coming to an end or not. You know what I'm saying? I guess. Yeah. Well, I mean, we have a book on the
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table here that says how to live with a huge penis. The world has got to be coming to an end.
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How does that tie into a blood moon? I don't know. You know what's interesting about that?
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But I'm just putting in all these truths, and I'm tying it together, and I think the
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world's coming to an end. So what I think we need to do is we need to have, like, the
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coolest podcast ever, and, like, just, like, while the world's ending, we can just report
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on it. Right. Well, to your point, though, I think people are too obsessed about that kind
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of stuff instead of just saying, every day, I could die, so how am I living? Rather than
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the end of the world, just saying, every day, I'm going to die someday, so how am I
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living? Yeah, there's no question. People lose sight of that. Yeah. Every day. I mean,
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every day. Every day, people wake up, they go through the motions, they go to work, they
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come home. They say, oh, you know what? What I really want to be, I'll start that
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tomorrow. You know, and then on, you know, the day they're ready to start, they get hit
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by a fucking bus on the way home from work. You know what I mean? Right. It just seems to
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always happen that way, and people need to start realizing that our time here is definitely
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not guaranteed, and it is limited, you know, and that's what we try to come with here. We
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try to get perspective on you guys. We try to bring information that's going to help
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you get to where you want to be, and yeah, we're going to curse. Yeah, we're going to
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say offensive things. It is called the motherfucking CEO for a reason, because I am really tired,
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tired, and a lot of us are tired, clearly, by the amount of downloads, thank you very
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much, that we are seeing, of the fluffy, butterfly, pixie dust, everybody fucking wins
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attitude that's been bred into our society for the last 20 years. So if that's your
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style, if you want to go hear about how things, you know, might be or should be and
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not how they are, this probably isn't the podcast for you. Right. So anyhow, that's the
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question of the day. Is the world ending? What do you think, Ben? I really would love
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to hear a Bible verse from Vaughn, because I've never really bought into any of this stuff.
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You know, the world is coming to, I mean, really, the world is coming to an end based
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on what? Dude, I just thought of a new segment we can have. We could have Vaughn
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rap Bible verses. Oh, shit. Yeah. Tyler is laughing. This would be awesome. All right. So
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every segment, every day. So Vaughn, you better be ready next time. I'll be ready. Vaughn's
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going to come in. He's going to rap a verse. All right. I'll be ready. Yeah. There's
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actually a rapper named Lecrae. Lecrae? Yeah. He's a Christian. He's a Christian. He's a
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Christian rapper. And he's so good that there are a lot of people who are not
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Christian that really like him. Wow. What does he rap about? He has like one of the
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top iTunes downloads. You know, I don't, I don't know the last time I, I can't tell you
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the last time I listened to him. Do you do your white boy boogie? I do the white man's
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overbite. No, but, uh, you know, we should have a, we, I don't know. We should
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every, see that Vaughn's coming out of his shell. He wants to rap. No, I was
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going to say every episode, new vibe to him over there. I think it may come out
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every, every episode we should have a segment of just deep thoughts with
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pastor Vaughn. What do you think? I think it should be, I agree. I'll, we, we
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will allow that as long as it's a rap format. All right. I'll, I'll plan that ahead
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of time. I think as much trouble as he gets for coming over to the dark side, I think
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we need to have some pastor thoughts. That's true. No, he still has it in him.
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That's true. Cause I've given, I've given my soul over to the life of podcasts and
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riches on the former pastor. And now he's podcaster, uh, slash riches, bitches.
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Dude, we get, we get, we get a fucking email sent to us that says, Vaughn, what's it
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like to turn your back on God and become a podcaster for the life of riches? I mean,
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dude, there's something fucking wrong with people. I haven't seen it. The world's
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definitely coming to you. You know, Andy keeps promising it, but I haven't seen it
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yet. So, and I know he's got this big tub of like, like you said, last episode, you
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got this big pool of gold bullion. Yeah. Like Scrooge. Yeah. Scrooge, Scrooge
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McDuck. Yeah, that's right. So, so anyway, all right guys. So like today what we're
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going to do is we're going to talk about one of the most commonly misunderstood
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words in the English language. We talked a lot about this privately. Um, I'm
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interested to hear what my dad has to say about it because I don't think we've
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ever talked about this before. We talked about a lot of things, but, um, we're
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going to talk about the true meaning of success. You know, I call the young guys
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coming up. You guys all know if you follow me, I call them the young bucks.
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All right. And the young bucks coming up, man, they're always looking at, at the
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material things, you know? And when I was young, that's what I looked at too. I
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looked at the cars. I looked at the house. I looked at the lifestyle and I'm like,
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man, you know, that's going to be awesome. And that's what I strived for. Okay. And,
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and, and you think, okay, once I get to that, I'll be successful. I'm holding up
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quote unquote, you know? Um, and today we're going to talk about the real meaning
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of success and what that means and why it's important for you to understand that
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now, as opposed for you to spend the next 20 years chasing something, get there and
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realize that it's not exactly what you want. Okay. So we're going to talk about the
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meaning of success and, and to start us off, um, I think you wanted me to, what, what
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do you, yeah, it was, it's funny that we were talking about spiritual things. Cause
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you kind of had this sort of Moses up on the Mount Sinai moment where you
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realized something about success. What was it like a year or two? Yeah, man. Uh,
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so I have this forever growing up and my dad knows this, like when we were little
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kids, um, he was real good about instilling in us, you know, Hey, if you work
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hard and you do this, you could have that, you know? And he would point to the
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things we'd see a cool car or we talk about shit and he'd be like, yeah, but you've
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got to work to get that. Right. And so I've always grown up in my business wanting to
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get to a certain point financially thinking like, Oh, that's where I need to be. Okay.
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And, um, so about a year and a half ago, um, I got pneumonia. All right. And I got sick
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and I missed over three weeks, three full weeks of work. And what that, when I had
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pneumonia, I couldn't leave the house. I was in the house every day, sitting on the
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couch, drinking fucking beers, hanging out, you know, watching Pacific Rim 47
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fucking times, which surprisingly enough, that movie is still fucking on all the
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time. It's been on for like two years. Like, do you guys have network? Is it? I
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got dish network. Oh, what do you guys have? AT&T. What do you have?
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DirecTV. Well, yeah, I have, I have DirecTV too, but I mean, that's whoever programs the
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movies on cable and dish and all that. You motherfuckers are lazy. Switch up the fucking
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movies. Okay. Because I've seen Pacific Rim 317 times and it's still good. All right.
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There's nothing cooler than big giant robots fighting each other. Right. All right. But
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the point is this, I sat on the couch. All right. We were doing great business at that
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time, which we're still, we're doing much better now. I was at a point where I was
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recently married. You know, I have the nice cars. I have the nice house. I make a
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great money. I make a better money than I ever had. And I'm sitting on the couch, not
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lifting a fucking finger. And I thought a lot about where I was. And, you know, you
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have a lot of time to think when you're, when you can't even leave the house, you
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know, it's, it's a, it's like being a prisoner of your own brain, especially when
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you're somebody who thinks about things. And I started thinking, I'm like, man, you
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know, like, this is like what everybody wants. You know, you can sit on the house,
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you could do whatever the fuck you want. You've got everything you need. And, you
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know, here I am making all this money and I'm not doing shit. This is, you know, this
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is what people want, except for I was miserable. I hated it. I was unfulfilled. I
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didn't feel good about it. I, I missed my people at work. I missed going to work. I
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miss being around the people I'm working with. And, um, it gave me some perspective
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that I think I needed because up until that point, it was just about really just
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chasing those goals that I had set earlier, you know? And, uh, what I came to
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realize for myself is that success isn't, and this is going to sound corny and it's
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going to sound like what fucking everybody says, but success isn't a
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destination. It's not a point in time that you reach. Okay. It's about
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fulfilling your ultimate potential. You know, I, and that's how I define it. I
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define success as fulfilling your potential. Okay. And what that means is
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that it's not a destination. Okay. And we all see that quote, success is not a
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destination. It's a journey, but there is truth to that. I never really thought about
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it as a real thing, but it's the point between where you are and where you can
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be, not where you want to be because where you think you want to be, you know,
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at the time I was 34 years old when that happened and I'm pretty much exactly where
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I wanted to be in all aspects. So what do you do the rest of your life? Do you just
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sit at home and do nothing, you know? And I think people misunderstand the point of
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what success is until they get to that point and then they look around. And so
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what we're trying to get to guys is this, we want to talk about this because we want
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you to realize, and you always hear these things like you especially hear this from
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unambitious people or people who aren't, you know, moving forward in their life. And
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they say shit like this, it's not success isn't about money. You know, success is not
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about material things. Success is not blah, blah, blah. And that's true. That's a hundred
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percent true. But there's a difference between understanding that you are on a path to fulfill
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your potential and using that as a fucking excuse to go sit in the corner and not do the
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fucking work. Totally two different things, right?
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Yeah. When you first told me that story, the thing that I found most compelling about it was
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you kept on saying, you are the measure of your own success. You, you, you. And I know
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you have, I, you and I have talked about this is that most people don't think about
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that. They, most people think of it in terms of comparison. Like how do I measure up to
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Andy or how do I measure up to Ben or how do I measure up to somebody else? And I know
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you've told me before that that's not only an unwise thing to do. It's, it's really being
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unfair to yourself. Well, yeah. Cause you don't really start at the same place as
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everybody else. You know, I've got this guy here who raised me and my brother to be
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competitive. He raised us to do the right thing. He raised us to, uh, always do the best that
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we can. And he would happen to be in business. Um, you know, what happening? I was in business
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by my own choice. I know, but, but, but I couldn't choose being born into somebody who
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owned their own business. I can remember pulling up to school one day when we were, uh, going
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to, um, grade school and it was like, you know, eight 30 and I'm like, I, and this is when
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I first realized that what he did for a living, I said, Hey, isn't your boss going to be going
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to be mad at you for like being late, you know, dropping us off. And he's like, well,
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no, cause I am the boss, you know? And I'm like, Oh, well, that's pretty fucking cool.
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But you know, tell, tell him your story a little bit about how you got, how you just
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and take your time, tell them how you got in business and what you did.
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It, the, the, the story starts with my dad and, and, uh, that's all I could say. He
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was in business. He was an electrical contractor. He had like 15 guys that worked for him. And
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literally when we were, we had, there was seven boys, uh, five in a row and they, we had 12
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kids. There was seven boys and five girls. So, but the first five boys were, were about
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one year apart. So we, we basically lived in like a, a dog zoo, if you want to say that,
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you know, throw the kids a bone. It was always fist fighting and punching and screaming. But
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my dad made us work always. He made us go out and earn money. He, he made us clean the trucks. He
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made us, uh, do all the things. This is when we're five years old, six years old, seven years old.
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And by the time I was 10, I could wire a house. By the time I was 15, I was a full electrician. I could
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do anything under the sun. And he, he would. How many houses you burned down? Oh, I don't know.
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That was before they had the battery powered drills and all the things now. And he, he would
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put us on a house and we had hand, hand tools, uh, the old tool, the drill that went like this,
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which you can't see on his podcast, but you did it by hand and he would put us in a house
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and he'd mark little yellow, red, green, and blue, uh, uh, marks on a two by fours.
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And we'd drill the holes and we would wire the whole house that way. It would be five little
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guys. And the owner was never there when we did that. I know that. Of course, free labor.
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Nowadays you go to jail for this shit. Yeah. But we learned responsibility. We learned how to work.
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We, we, we dug all the ditches. We climbed in the attics. We climbed in the holes with the snakes
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underneath the houses. And, uh, that's how we grew up. And, and he literally quite a bit
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different than, uh, sticking your kids in front of a Nintendo. No, we didn't have a Nintendo.
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You wonder why, you wonder why there's such a big giant gap in the, but one of the, one of the,
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one of the things, and there's so many rules and, uh, so many rules that, that he, I would say,
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I always said beat it in our head, but it was the same thing I did with Andrew and Sal beat it in
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her head. Everything's a lesson. I was, you know, you want to be the best. You do the best. You go
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twice as hard. You got superpower. You can do, you want to get beat by that guy. Why would you want to
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get beat by somebody else? You want to be better than him. And it's up to you. It's not up to somebody
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else. It's you. And you got it in your power. Not me, not me myself. It's you. It's you. It's you.
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It's you. And, and, and, uh, uh, we, we were always about athletics and I'm getting kind of
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off the story here, but it was athletically selling and we're both gifted and both of them,
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uh, in, in soccer. I mean, this is started in the company here was the, was the kill chant.
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Yeah. And, and, uh, I tell him, go out in the soccer field. I said, those, they're your enemy.
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You go out there and you want to kill them. This is like right over five years old. Okay. So
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you're like, he's like sensei from karate kid. Yeah. Right. The bad guy except for like,
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dude, it wasn't, you guys don't understand. And, and people don't understand. And when I tell this
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story, people fucking think that I'm either bullshitting or they think that I'm fucking
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crazy or they think that you're crazy. But like, we have this chant that we do here at our company
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called kill, kill, kill. Okay. So after every meeting, everybody puts their hands in and we
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fucking do the chant. All right. That chance started when I was five or six years old on
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the way to soccer games. All right. We'd be in the back of the fucking car going to the
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soccer game and, and most likely Sal and I would be fighting. And, and the deal was, is okay.
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If you scored a goal or if you hurt another kid, you get to get a pick on a toy. All right.
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There's always a payoff. Yeah. So, so we went to, uh, and I'm serious, dude, this is dead serious.
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So we would go to the games and he would go, all right, look, it's time to get serious.
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Quit fucking around back there. Blah, blah, blah. And he'd give us a speech and say, all
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right, now what are you going to do when you get there? And we'd be like, kill. And he'd
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be like, what are you going to do? And we'd be like, kill. And we'd be like, what are you
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going to do? And we'd be like, kill, kill, kill. We went out there and fucking kill these
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kids, dude. I mean, it would just be pure brutality. Like you're, you would go to jail today.
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So to your point, you, you, you benefited from a legacy of hard work.
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Oh, no question. It was their thought, their, their thought process that I instilled in
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them was the fact that if you do your best, it wasn't about killing somebody or hurting
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them. They didn't, they understood that. That wasn't, it wasn't it. The way to score that
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goal was over that guy, not around him. And if you ran right at him and, and this is the
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way most people are, unfortunately, they'll get the hell out of the way because they're scared.
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Right. They, they, they never were taught those rules. Right. You have it in your power.
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I don't, you know. Well, I was, I was teasing you and calling you sensei, but all kidding
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aside, I don't even know what it is. Well, he, you don't know the sensei from karate kid.
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Listen, you're, you guys are young guys. Well, but to your point though, you, you, it, to
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me, you're, you're teaching your kids something that most people don't teach their kids, which
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is the value of competition. The value of competition, the value of taking responsibility. If
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you've heard him say 30 times already, it's about you. It's about what you do. It's not
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about what the other guy does or what, you know, it's about taking responsibility for
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what you do in your life. Yeah. This was never about hurting somebody. And that, and that
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concept gets through with people that don't understand. No, they don't. Andrew Sale and I
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understand perfectly. And maybe it's about being aggressive. Go out and kill it. I mean,
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just go do your bet. Go out and absolutely kill it. It was about being aggressive. It
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was about going out, going in the fucking corner. And he would always say puck. Okay.
1.00
00:19:42.100
But it was soccer. Cause our older brother is a, was a hockey player. And so he got in
00:19:46.080
the habit of saying puck. So you'd be like, you go in the corner, you get aggressive, you
00:19:49.360
go in the corner and you come out with the fucking puck. All right. I did curse back then.
1.00
00:19:54.520
But it was, he still curses. He's still, before we put him on this podcast 10 minutes
00:19:59.280
ago, he doesn't even know what a fuck a podcast is. We had to explain it to him. Okay. So,
0.99
00:20:03.940
and then come to find out he's got a periscope. He said he's going live. I'm going live right
00:20:09.920
now. Four followers. Right. So Ben, you, you've been waiting patiently to say something. I pay
00:20:17.620
attention to the things that people say. And if everybody heard big Jim, he called them
00:20:23.020
rules, not lessons. And there's a big difference between a rule and a lesson. A rule is this
00:20:29.200
is the way that it is. If you want to be successful, this is a rule of life as opposed to here's
00:20:34.300
a lesson. A lesson is I'm going to go to school. I don't like what the teacher says. Maybe I'm
00:20:38.500
going to listen. Maybe I'm not a rule here. He's looking at his boys in the eyes and saying,
00:20:43.080
you want to be successful in life, son? This is the rule. Follow it. You'll be successful
00:20:47.680
and look at the by-product. Yeah. Well, here's the thing. Okay. So, so we'll talk more about
00:20:51.940
how you started your company here in a little bit. But the point we're making here is that
00:20:55.500
you can't, you cannot judge yourself against other people because you have no fucking idea
0.95
00:21:01.560
where that person came from. See, I, you guys look at me and you say, blah, blah, blah.
0.98
00:21:07.280
Look at all this shit. And yes, we have a great story. Yes. We started with very little finances
1.00
00:21:12.700
and we've turned them into a lot of finances. Yes. It's taken a long time. And yes, it took
00:21:17.980
a lot of fucking blood, sweat, and tears, but here's the reality. I also had a lot in
0.99
00:21:22.600
my brain to start with that I had from being born into, into something, you know, and you
00:21:29.420
can't help that. So, and which is the reason we do this, right? That's the reason we're even
00:21:33.520
doing this podcast. We don't get paid to do this. We do this because we want to bring the
00:21:38.880
old school hardcore lessons to you that I learned that have helped me and that Ben, you know,
00:21:45.360
you guys have learned as well growing up, you know, and that's the point of the whole
00:21:50.580
show. And that's really why I wanted him to come on. He didn't even know he was coming
00:21:53.640
on until an hour ago. I just texted him and said, Hey, come up here. He's like, why?
00:21:57.000
I'm like to be on the podcast. So then I find out he calls Sal, my brother, and he's like,
00:22:01.800
what? Do I got to like dress nice and stuff? Or like, what do I got to do? Like he didn't
00:22:05.220
even, I'm like, no, it's a podcast. He's like, I've got a periscope. Wait, wait, wait,
00:22:08.600
I can't make it up there. I'm redoing my bathroom. I'm filthy dirty. I got a carpenter
00:22:13.480
working. I'm working with him. And I just got all this stuff. So I got to abandon him
00:22:18.100
and tell him I got to leave. And now I got to go back and I probably have the plumbing
00:22:23.320
in the wrong spot and this in the wrong spot, but I can make that do. Yeah. But that's okay.
00:22:27.740
Do I have to like get you cleaned up? Come on, you know, no, man, nobody can see you.
00:22:32.240
It's just audio. You know, the rules, you know, my question, I'm not surprised what these
00:22:39.680
guys do at all. I see it exactly. And I, my question is what's taking you so long?
00:22:43.900
Yeah. No shit. And like, but that's the same thing.
0.99
00:22:46.020
I don't, I just, not at all. I know what's in his brain and what's in Sal's brain. I,
00:22:50.220
it, you call it beat it in her brain. Uh, the rules of the rules of being successful
00:22:55.640
and the word success, I can define it 10 different ways. Yeah. And you know, and you,
00:22:59.740
right. Success is defined, uh, within your own, uh, world for different things. You got
00:23:08.460
social success, you got personal success, not, not just financial success. There's so many ways
00:23:14.660
you could just say it. And, and, uh, uh, but that, that, that's a big word and it's defined
00:23:22.360
differently by different people. And, um, it just isn't financial. You got to be whole and complete.
00:23:29.740
Cold and complete is, is, is, is one way of saying it. And lack of fulfillment is, is that's
00:23:36.160
very, very important to, uh, figure that out. You got to figure it out on your own. I can't,
00:23:41.620
I can't teach you that. Well, no, I know, but you got to figure it out all on your own.
00:23:45.780
Listen, man, I've already figured it out. That's what the whole story was about.
00:23:48.980
I do like what you said about, you know, what's taking you so long, because Andy, I know one of the
00:23:52.620
things that you've always talked about too, in, in terms of understanding success and why it's such a bad
00:23:57.220
idea to, uh, to compare yourself to other people is not just about what advantages that they have,
00:24:03.720
but also you don't know how long they've been at it.
00:24:05.960
Dude, I just had this conversation with, uh, with Steve Mayer, agent Steven on Instagram.
00:24:10.440
He's a good buddy of mine. Just talk to him on the phone this morning. We're talking about this.
00:24:14.020
He's 40. I just turned 36. Okay. And he was talking about going to a benefit for Matt Damon's
00:24:21.180
charity where there's, uh, all these dudes that have six, seven, eight, nine cars that
00:24:27.840
are million dollar plus cars. And we're, cause we both are car fanatics. So we're talking cars
00:24:31.780
and I'm like, I'm like, dude, you know, the thing is, is like when I'm around those guys,
0.96
00:24:40.000
I always feel like such a fucking loser because like, I'm not there yet. And he, and he, and he's
0.92
00:24:44.240
like, he's like, dude, me too. And then we're like, we're both like, yeah, but they're fucking
0.99
00:24:49.520
60 and you're 39. I'm 36. And if you had everything you wanted now, what is there to
0.99
00:24:56.200
fucking work for? What is there to progress for? What is there to push for? And so, you
0.98
00:25:01.000
know, you always have to keep in line, you know, it's some people are very, very bad about
00:25:07.780
placing themselves in a real position of where they are. Um, and that's called self-awareness.
00:25:13.180
You know, you want to develop the skill of being able to place yourself in an honest
00:25:17.820
fashion of where you are. You know, a lot of people are either very arrogant about how
00:25:21.980
much progress they made and they're not humble, or a lot of people feel so bad about the progress
00:25:26.780
that they haven't made that they're never like able to appreciate what they have actually
00:25:31.440
done. Let me, let me, uh, say something. I wasn't criticizing your project, what progress,
00:25:37.700
what I was really saying is, I know what you meant. I know, I know you and I do, but I
00:25:43.160
for other people on the other side of this microphone, you know, who the hell they are.
00:25:48.840
I don't know who they are. There's somebody out there. That's, it's, it's not, I'm not
00:25:53.940
criticizing at all. There's a turtle, turtle, turtle, tortoise and a hare. No, the thing is
00:25:58.280
what you were saying is this, it's you guys like when I say like when people call me successful,
0.86
00:26:03.700
like I, you guys heard me say that I get really fucking annoyed by that. You know what I mean?
00:26:08.080
Because I personally feel like we should be so much further along than what we are. And,
00:26:14.020
and that's just the nature of somebody who is driven, who wants to progress and wants to succeed.
00:26:21.220
That's, that's a natural feeling. You know, the people who say, Oh dude, I fucking made it. Those
0.75
00:26:26.420
are the people that lose everything they have. You know, they're sitting on the mountain looking down
00:26:30.200
or their little anthill that they think is a mountain looking down saying, Oh, I'm the greatest.
00:26:34.720
And then guess what? We talked about this on a, on two podcasts ago. I'll be humble. You know,
00:26:39.400
they're not humble enough to realize that like, Hey, I've had a little bit of success, which is me.
00:26:43.520
I've had a little bit of success. There's people who are fucking thousand times more in every area
0.96
00:26:49.760
than I have ever progressed. So you have to be able to look at that. And like, that's, you know,
0.89
00:26:56.240
that's what I was trying to get out with that story about Steve. You know, Steve's a very successful
00:26:59.160
dude. You know, he, he just bought a $2 million fucking car, you know? Um, we're, we're, we're
0.99
00:27:06.620
both the same. We're both like, fuck dude. There's, we're like so far behind where we should
1.00
00:27:10.440
be. And that's a mentality. And I think that's what, I mean, you have the same mentality.
00:27:15.640
Well, your, your, your little story you told before about looking backwards, present in the
00:27:22.720
future. I mean, there's a, I'll give you a little bit different version. It's the same version,
00:27:27.740
but a little bit different words. Uh, we'll use the word happiness versus success. And those,
00:27:34.420
those are not the same words, but they're close. And it's defined that the journey,
00:27:40.680
the journey is the part, you didn't even know when you're on a journey all the time,
00:27:44.120
you're on a journey or we're on a journey right now, right? You're on a journey right now. And
00:27:47.720
when you, when you look back, your world is defined by successes you had and failures.
00:27:53.880
And if you have more successes and failures, you look back and you say, man, I was freaking
00:27:58.420
good, man. And you, and you get happy about that. Right. And if you stop and you stop there
00:28:05.920
and you just keep looking back, man, you're dead. Right. It's a great point. Yeah. I mean,
00:28:09.940
that's, that's, but I've seen so many people and I'm not going to name names. You and I
00:28:14.740
have seen people that have amassed fucking fortunes. And when I say you and I, I'm pointing
1.00
00:28:19.600
at my dad, they have amassed fortunes and fucking lost them because of that exact point.
0.97
00:28:25.300
Yeah. And then, you know, looking forward to the future, you, you got to define that
0.97
00:28:28.900
future over and over and over again. It's not, it's not. And what you think will make
00:28:33.120
you happy isn't always what it is, but you've got to have goals and, and you got to wake
00:28:37.520
up and say, man, I'm going to go buy that $2 million car. Right. That's, that's what
00:28:41.840
it is. But it's not just that guys. And that's, that's what we're trying to do.
00:28:45.300
No, no, no, it, it, it's, it's not, uh, it's, it's that complete picture, which maybe it took
00:28:52.900
me a long time to figure this out. It was 35 before I kind of got it. And you're at that
00:28:57.520
age where I got, man, I was in business, was making all kinds of money and I was doing
00:29:02.960
this and doing that. And I got to do everything in the world. You name me a place I've been, I've
00:29:06.880
been there. You name me something you've done, I'll top you. People nowadays think I'm full
00:29:10.860
of shit sometimes because they'll tell a story and I'll tell four of them. Do you know
1.00
00:29:15.240
what I mean? I've been here. He's been around the world, man. And, and, and, and, uh, that's
00:29:20.900
fine. I can brag about it. I don't even give a shit. I mean, you know, I'm still the same
00:29:25.120
guy I was. I'm not any different. I don't, my ego is I wake up happy every day. I look
00:29:32.300
around, I wait for somebody to fuck it up and I'm going to fuck them up. Kill, kill, kill.
1.00
00:29:38.000
No, but you don't, don't disturb me. I'm a rattlesnake, but I'm, I'm happy. You know
1.00
00:29:42.380
what I am? I wake up and you mean like, you mean like a fucking grizzly Adams next door
0.99
00:29:47.480
to your next door. My dad's arch enemy is grizzly Adams, his next door neighbor. That's
0.99
00:29:52.720
What's really impressive about you, big Jim though, is, and I've, I've heard this because
00:29:56.320
Andy has been accused of, Oh, he just rode the coattails of his, of his dad. And yeah,
00:30:01.420
right. And that's, what's really impressive to you is that in spite of all your success,
00:30:05.000
you made your son do it himself. I didn't make him do it. He did it on his own. I, I
00:30:10.540
encouraged him and we, we had a million conversations. I can remember doing shit. I can remember doing
0.99
00:30:15.880
shit. Remember when you made me and Rob and Chris build that fucking fence in the backyard,
1.00
00:30:20.040
dude, it was 150 fucking degrees outside. I swear it was the hottest. It's the hottest
0.99
00:30:26.540
I've ever remembered it. And we had to build this fence around his swimming pool. And that
00:30:32.020
doesn't sound like a lot of work, but dude, we had to dig the post holes. It was rock and
00:30:36.300
it was like fucking pure rock. And so dude, to dig one hole, you know, it sucks. Right?
1.00
00:30:40.560
Normally you guys, everybody here has probably dug a post hole. It's dude, those fucking things
1.00
00:30:45.040
suck. You know, I'm not talking about with like an auger. I'm talking about with the thing
1.00
00:30:48.700
you get at home Depot that you just throw in the ground. Right. All right, dude, 50 million
00:30:54.660
holes. And it's probably 200. No, dude, it took like, it seriously took like four weeks
00:31:01.140
to dig the fucking holes. Okay. But every day we had to go out there and dig the holes
0.99
00:31:05.340
and that, and, and it's just shit like that, you know, learning the value of what work is
0.97
00:31:10.020
that puts people at an advantage. And today now, you know, parents are afraid to make their
0.98
00:31:15.520
kids fucking get off the goddamn fucking video. Instead they make them, you know, they say,
1.00
00:31:20.940
Oh, Johnny, you know, I'm going to make you fold your laundry. That's not fucking work.
0.99
00:31:25.340
You know, make them fucking work. That's what's wrong with our fucking society right now. You
1.00
00:31:29.880
know, people think work is folding their t-shirts at maximum for 10 minute break off of doom or
0.99
00:31:35.880
whatever the fuck they're playing now. See, but this is what fired me up when Andy and I first
0.77
00:31:40.580
met and the opportunity to be challenged by you, to be inspired by you, to grow together,
00:31:45.300
to talk about doing tours around the world, to do all these things is because of that mindset
00:31:49.880
that came from your rules. And I will never forget the second time we're ever together.
00:31:54.920
We sat in your training room and we were doing stuff on the whiteboard. And I wish you guys
00:31:59.720
could have been there to see this. I would ask Andy questions. He'd talk about, no, it's the next
00:32:04.380
level. It's where we're going with first form. Then he would talk about what he wanted to do as a
00:32:08.360
speaker and, and the opportunity to inspire you and to go and allow you to realize your unrealized
00:32:14.760
potential. That is your success. It's saying it doesn't, the dollars don't matter. What matters
00:32:19.800
is I have more inside of me that I can give to this business. I have more inside of me that I can
00:32:25.800
give to other people and you're doing it and you're not even close to being done because all you want
00:32:30.840
to do every single day, correct me if I'm wrong, is wake up and tap into that unrealized potential
00:32:35.800
because today is the day that you have. You got none other than today and it's an opportunity to work
00:32:40.660
your ass off. And that mindset has been lost in the world today, dude. First of all, yeah, not by
00:32:46.980
everybody. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Too many, by too many, by too many. And that's the point of what
00:32:55.020
we're talking about here. That's the point of this. That's why it's called a project. That's why we call
00:33:00.740
it the MFCEO project. People are like, why do you call it the MFCEO project? Well, first of all, it's the
00:33:06.900
motherfucking CEO. All right. Because everybody in society is so fucking pussy now that they can't
1.00
00:33:13.720
handle a fuck. Well, fuck, fuck, fuck. That's what I'm going to say. All right. Second of all,
1.00
00:33:19.560
it's a project because that mentality in general for most fucking people has been lost. It's been lost
0.99
00:33:27.440
because when we go to school and we grow up, we're taught, we are taught by people
00:33:32.640
who are in situations that they have accepted in life. Okay. So the kids fucking get set in front
00:33:43.500
of doom. They get sent to school who, you know, and dude, I love teachers. Dude, my teachers had
0.99
00:33:49.600
tremendous influence on my life. That's why we do things for our high school. It's our biggest charity
00:33:53.880
that we give to you. All right. But they're not, for the most part, kids are not being taught
00:34:00.160
that, you know, Hey, kill, kill, kill, and go, go get it and be aggressive and don't worry about
0.94
00:34:07.080
what people say about you and face criticism. Instead, they're being taught, Hey, little Johnny,
0.99
00:34:13.080
it's okay. You know, that person just has, you know, they didn't take their fucking riddle in today,
0.99
00:34:17.600
you know, instead of being taught like, Hey, toughen the fuck up and go do it anyway.
0.99
00:34:22.880
You know, like we talk and that's why it's called a project because we're trying to bring a fucking
0.98
00:34:27.040
message that is just not being brought at this point in time. So I, you know, I find that,
0.97
00:34:33.780
that highly successful people, the ones that I've met, be it in sports or in boardrooms around the
00:34:38.160
world, it's one of two things. They either have these rules that they've learned growing up or they've
00:34:42.780
faced adversity in their life. Right. You know, my parents were divorced at six months old. I'm
00:34:47.180
seven years old, watching my mother come to the dinner table with an IV stand every single day.
00:34:52.660
My mother's dying in front of my eyes as a seven year old boy, 24 hour nursing care in our home.
00:34:58.420
And my mother is coming to the dinner table to ask me how my day was at school. And I don't talk about
00:35:03.060
this much, but after my mother passed away, my father moved back in, had challenges of his own
00:35:08.140
that resulted in him being passed out on the couch every single night when I got home from school.
00:35:12.560
And I thought daddy was tired. My dad was not tired. My dad had issues that he stared straight
00:35:18.340
in the face. So my whole life, it's been adversity. It's been challenged. It's been getting knocked
00:35:22.440
down. But you know what? I had people that surrounded me mentors and coaches and people
00:35:26.440
who loved on me to help me get up off the mat of life. And just because the world has told you,
00:35:31.160
maybe it isn't your time. You can choose to take a positive path. There are people who are going to
00:35:35.800
give you those rules, those guidelines, those coaches. And what frustrates me is when people say,
00:35:40.560
oh, somebody didn't take their riddle and they didn't do this. But you know what? It's their
00:35:44.200
choice. It's your choice to not respond positively. And there's perspective. And I've been through
00:35:49.660
enough where anytime something tries to shake me, I say, you better come harder because my mother came
00:35:54.620
to the dinner table with an IV stand. So you better come with some serious heat because you will not
00:35:58.560
break me. Right. And people need to have that mindset that you can persevere. You know, I mean,
00:36:04.720
we're talking, we could talk about 50 different points here, but I think to round out, you know,
00:36:09.400
our first point in our first segment here is, is that guys, it's you. Okay. You are the measure
00:36:16.180
of your own success. It doesn't fucking matter how much money you've made, how many businesses
0.99
00:36:20.500
you've started, how famous and influential you become. It's if you're not living up to the potential
00:36:25.820
you have, and you have still more in the tank to give and progress, you're going to be a fucking
1.00
00:36:31.400
failure. You're going to die with a bunch of regret. You're going to say, Hey, I could have done
1.00
00:36:35.300
boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Had I just given a little bit more. All right. That's the first
00:36:40.140
point of what we're talking about when we talk about success. Um, we've, we've got a lot more
00:36:44.760
to come. I'm going to toss it to Vaughn here real quick and let him do the extremely important,
00:36:49.140
um, technical stuff that Vaughn does. So, um, and, and, you know, go ahead and give that
00:36:55.340
information now before we move on to the next, next point. Sure. I'm going to make it quick because
00:36:58.580
we always have a lot of fire in our episodes, but you guys are on fuego right now. I think it's
00:37:04.320
because we care that much. Yeah. Yeah. No, I mean, I'm not kidding. This is, this is amazing,
00:37:08.820
but, uh, guys, if you want the show notes and the links galore to this episode, go to the MFCEO.com
00:37:15.380
forward slash P 14. Uh, we've got a lot of things that we're going to be getting up on the website.
00:37:20.560
We've got so much going on. It's, uh, it's a little overwhelming at times, but it's a great
00:37:25.040
privilege. And so keep, keep your eyes on the website. Uh, there'll be some products coming
00:37:28.920
out. We're just about to start production for a new course that, uh, Andy's going to do on, uh,
00:37:34.540
on risk-taking. So get ready for that in a couple months. And of course, uh, in the near future,
00:37:41.100
we've got the books coming down the pike at some, uh, sometime soon, but we're, we're working hard.
00:37:45.640
But, uh, in addition to that, we're just going to go around and real quick, uh, Ben, you're at
00:37:49.640
Continued Fight. At Continued Fight is Periscope, Instagram, Twitter, and then Ben Newman for
00:37:55.480
everything else. Okay. Uh, Andy Frisella on Instagram, um, and Periscope. Uh, I'm spending
00:38:02.560
a lot of time on Periscope guys. If you haven't, um, downloaded the app, you need to get on.
00:38:08.340
I think by this time, uh, when this show airs, I should be somewhere in the, in the top 40
00:38:13.840
on Periscope in the world. So, um, guys, I'm spending my majority of my time there. Come to
00:38:19.200
Periscope, check it out. It's an awesome app. It's very interactive. We get to speak one-on-one
00:38:23.880
very, very cool app. Uh, join the horses. And if you don't know what that means, hop on, get
00:38:29.340
me at Andy Frisella, join the horses. Giddy up motherfucker. And then we have a, we have my
1.00
00:38:35.520
Snapchat, which is MFCO dash one. Um, and I'm, you know, I, that's my behind the scenes stuff.
00:38:41.280
That's like, you know, I put a lot of car picks and stuff like that on there. Yeah. So I'm at
00:38:46.000
Vaughn Kohler, V-A-U-G-H-N-K-O-H-L-E-R. That's Instagram, Twitter, and, uh, MF, V-K-O dash
00:38:53.660
MFCEO on Snapchat. And I'm going to start Periscope next week, probably with a, uh, a
00:38:59.200
feedback for the MFCEO fans. Anybody who wants to share their feedback, I'll be listening
00:39:03.540
and that'll be next week. Well, next week, meaning the same week that this podcast comes
00:39:07.980
out. You finished your script is what you're saying. No, I didn't. I did. You know what I really
00:39:12.580
want to do. I, if I can get Andy to, to give me permission to this, cause this would be
00:39:16.220
a draw for people. I want to announce the, uh, the winners of the review contest on my
00:39:20.660
Periscope. That'd be cool. Can I do that? For sure. All right. Great. Great. Let me know.
00:39:23.940
Let me know when you're going to do it. Yeah, I'll do that. I'll do that. So that'll be next
00:39:26.740
week. And before we move on, uh, I got to mention our only sponsor and I'm proud to have them as
00:39:32.540
our only sponsor. I will not let people sponsor this show if I do not believe in their products
00:39:37.520
and we're getting approached nonstop, um, because of the rankings that we're getting
00:39:42.260
on iTunes about sponsoring. But this is a company that I believe in. This is a company
00:39:46.780
that I use their products. Um, and I like the guys who run it. They're just good dudes.
00:39:51.680
They're aggressive. They think outside the box and they embody a lot of the things that
00:39:56.300
we talk about here on the podcast. Business wise. Um, the company is called dollar, uh, the
00:40:02.920
dollar beer club. Okay. And you can find them on Instagram at dollar beer club. If you have
00:40:07.400
a beard, they have the best products that I've ever used. Okay. They've got good shampoo.
00:40:12.940
They've got oil, they've got bomb and wax and they send you all kinds of cool stuff. Like
00:40:17.200
I've got this brush here that, uh, I'm probably going to use on my beard and all my dogs. Cause
00:40:21.720
it's like a dual purpose thing. And I don't care about that because I got white hair in my
00:40:25.520
beard anyway. So it's going to mix all in, but here's the deal. If you have a beard, they
00:40:29.900
are the fucking shit dollar beer club, follow them on Instagram, uh, and, and get on their
1.00
00:40:34.500
products. If you don't have a beard, you are a gigantic vagina.
1.00
00:40:37.740
And grow a fucking beard. All right. So that's my pitch. I must be one, but I can grow a neck
1.00
00:40:44.020
beard. I think we talked about that. Yeah. Everybody in here has got at least a partial
00:40:48.220
beard, at least a baby man. I was able to oil up my scruff. I know Ben was busting out
00:40:53.800
the beard oil right before the show. What do you think? That's fantastic. Yeah. It makes
00:40:57.200
your face feel good, man. It feels real good. They should get the yak woman to be a sponsor.
1.00
00:41:01.400
I mean, you know, like a, like a spokesmodel guys, I'm serious. Follow them on Instagram.
00:41:05.780
Like for, for no other reason, even if you don't have a beard, yes, follow them on Instagram
00:41:10.260
and watch how they market their product. It's amazing. These guys get it. They're smart.
00:41:14.940
They've got great products. I mean, and I won't, I will not endorse a product that I do not like
00:41:20.180
or use. I just won't do it. A lot of guys will do that. I won't do it. Um, but besides the products,
00:41:25.360
they're worth watching from like a, uh, a case study on entrepreneurs and how to succeed
00:41:30.220
and build a company in today's, uh, social media world. You know, the guys are really
00:41:34.760
cool. Dollar beer club. Check them out. So, uh, anyway, back at it. Yeah. I'm, uh, I'm looking
00:41:42.380
at our outline and it says, say something to transition back into success talk. So I guess
00:41:47.880
that qualifies. Big Jim had, uh, something he wanted to say. You did. No, I got, you didn't
00:41:54.140
ask me about where, where, where I'm from. I'm, I'm usually at home. Oh, you can't get
00:42:01.660
me there. But you're on Periscope now. Yeah. I'm on Periscope now. I got four followers.
00:42:06.380
So I'm, I'm socially media inept. So are you MFDAD? That's what he should be. Yeah.
00:42:12.620
Probably ADD. I'm in love with Tyler here. Like he, we, we have some interesting conversations
00:42:19.860
because, um, what year did you get out of business? It was, uh, 2000 around 2000. Okay. So
00:42:27.320
the internet, like he basically exited his business. Um, he sold his business to his brother
00:42:32.100
around 2000, which was, we started our business in 99. All right. And, and so that timeframe
00:42:38.340
was a transition period and how business was done, you know, like technology for back then
00:42:44.420
was like fax machine. Right. And like everything was mail and it was paper and now it's no
00:42:49.660
paper. Now everything's automated. I can't, I open my laptop maybe once a week just to clear
00:42:54.980
the emails. I do everything off my phone. We have texts, Instagram, Facebook, all this
00:43:00.480
shit. And, and so him and I, you know, we, we've, you know, get together and have beers
0.95
00:43:05.740
and we have interesting conversations because it's so different in how we communicate, but
00:43:10.620
the principles are still the same. Well, really social media and, and the social media, you
00:43:16.840
know, he, Andrew, I don't say he says it this way, but he says, I don't freaking understand.
00:43:22.160
I don't understand. I don't, I understand perfectly, but the basics of business haven't
00:43:27.400
changed at all. It's still, okay. You advertise on Facebook. We used to advertise on WIL or
00:43:32.500
KMOX or whatever. You put so many dollars down, you got so many dollars back and only
00:43:37.900
yours is at a faster pace, faster. It's, it's, it's, yeah, it's constant. It's instant. I'm
00:43:42.980
not the concept. It hasn't changed. It's just a hundred thousand times faster.
00:43:47.160
Tell them how you find out about Facebook. No, I don't want to know. I don't have a
00:43:54.140
Facebook account. So I got to tell the story. You got to tell the story now. It's innocent
00:44:00.200
story. Okay. So this is how my dad finds out about Facebook. All right. So we, the reality
00:44:06.380
of it, this is how my dad finds out about Facebook. We go to Nashville, my bachelor party.
00:44:12.640
All right. As a group, as a group. And we, we go, it's, it's guys and girls. It was a
00:44:18.480
joint bachelor party. We went, there was like 50 people that went, I didn't do anything.
00:44:22.600
So, so we go out, you know, for four, three or four days, we go out every night, drink
00:44:28.280
beer, hang out party. It was awesome. Everybody had a good time. Well, Emily has like a shit
1.00
00:44:33.740
load of really good looking friends. Right. And they're all with us. And my dad's there
00:44:38.300
and we're all out having a good time innocently. Uh, you know, we're all on dance floor watching
00:44:43.640
the bands. If you haven't been to Nashville and gone on Broadway is awesome. Um, so we're
00:44:48.820
watching the bands and stuff and, and it, you know, everybody's kind of around each other.
00:44:52.720
Well, uh, these, some of these photos from the, the trip get posted, you know, we're all
00:44:58.980
out on the dance floor. Well, he's standing next to like the hottest girl in the group.
00:45:03.580
And it like, it just, the picture just looks like he's like dancing with her, but really
00:45:08.520
it's just like him hanging out with her. And so I get this text when we get back and he's
00:45:13.420
like, he's like, Hey, um, so he goes, what's this fucking Facebook thing? And I'm like, I'm
0.85
00:45:20.760
like, what, what, why? I can't really explain it via text. Well, somehow, uh, a photo got
00:45:29.100
posted of me and, uh, you need to make sure it gets off the internet. I'm like, I'm like
00:45:36.080
dad, I can't remove the photo from the internet. And so bullshit. He got it. It was off in about
0.99
00:45:42.540
10 minutes. So, so anyway, so come to find out, you know, I think he was getting kicked
00:45:47.720
out of his own house because somebody of some friend of a friend of a friend saw a picture
00:45:52.860
of him and reported it back home to him and his girlfriend he's been with for, I don't
00:45:57.540
know, 15 years, you know? Well, and so I, you know, we go over to his house and it's
00:46:01.640
his house and all his shit's in the fucking bags. It wasn't that bad. Yeah. Right. That
1.00
00:46:07.980
person's still around here. And, and, uh, Wendy, my girlfriend, well, that's why
00:46:12.540
they're friends now. They finally, they finally talked last Sunday. She was over
00:46:16.960
Sal's house and they talked, but the point is, is that that's funny. That's how much
00:46:21.160
he didn't know about social media. No, you know, he didn't know the rules on social
00:46:24.960
media. No, I know the rules. Yeah. I wasn't married while I was in business and
00:46:28.540
I know the rules, man. You get caught doing stuff. You got a regular girlfriend, you get
0.98
00:46:32.900
killed. Yeah. But here's the thing. You, that's the point about social media. That's
0.99
00:46:37.380
a good point. And although we're talking about business, it's a hundred percent
00:46:41.500
transparency. And if you go out and pretend to be something you're not nowadays, you're
00:46:46.040
going to get fucking caught when, whether that be with a girl or another guy, or whether
0.96
00:46:50.520
that be in your business or half truce of business, you can't, there's no
0.97
00:46:54.620
place for somebody to tell fables about anything anymore because the internet will make you
00:46:59.920
an honest man. And, uh, I just think that was, that's, that's anyway, the moral of the
00:47:04.660
story and that's our good transition. Um, I wouldn't finish. So, but go ahead. Hey,
00:47:09.740
look, we can talk about this all the time, but we got to stay on course here. Move on.
00:47:13.340
Yeah. So guys, we're talking about what the definition of success is. And there's a couple
00:47:18.660
other things, you know, you guys have to understand that you need to look at success in terms of
00:47:23.700
present, not past or future. I think people think that once they get rich or famous or
00:47:28.600
build a business or whatever story they've told themselves about what success is, that
00:47:33.940
they're successful. And that's not the truth. It's they were successful. You, if you're sitting
00:47:39.240
right now in a position that you think, Oh, I'm successful. No, you were successful. You
00:47:44.460
have to understand that time is always moving. Okay. It's a noun. It only has present form.
00:47:49.540
Success is a noun. It only has present tense. It doesn't have future tense. It doesn't have past
00:47:54.960
tense. Okay. Yeah. I think the thing that makes that really encouraging is that you, you could be
00:48:03.300
successful right now. Like today, if today you work to your full potential or not successful or not
00:48:08.320
successful, right. So it's, it's, it's based on constant activity. You can never rest on your
00:48:13.300
laurels. You can never like go into passive mode. You have to constantly be working on it, which
00:48:18.660
is, is both an accountability, but it's also an encouragement. Because like I said, you could
00:48:22.800
have, you know, the last year of your life, you could be living a half, half-assed life. But if,
00:48:27.680
if on Monday you decide, okay, I'm going to kill it, you're successful. Right. And, and it's a process,
0.99
00:48:34.340
you know, it's not a one-time accomplishment. It's just ongoing. It never stops. It's not static. It's
00:48:39.920
not, it's not something that you could just point to as a, as a blip, you know, it's dynamic,
00:48:45.120
it's fluid. It's always moving. It's always in forward motion. And the moment you stop and focus
00:48:50.340
backwards and not stop and stop moving to, to fulfill the potential or giving what you have in
00:48:55.320
the tank, you're not successful anymore. And I think people, you know, you may have the prizes
00:49:00.800
around you that the past work or the past success that you've developed, you know, have provided you,
00:49:08.360
but that doesn't mean you're successful. So when I'm sitting on the couch watching, you know,
00:49:13.420
Pacific Rim, you know, drinking my, my beer, hanging out, waiting for me to, you know,
00:49:19.860
get my next paycheck, I'm not successful. I'm enjoying some of the fruits of my past success
00:49:26.180
at that time. And if you sit in that zone long enough, guess what happens to those fruits?
00:49:31.600
They get eaten up and they're not there and you don't get to enjoy them. And a lot of people look
00:49:36.240
at this success and this is why this is dangerous guys. A lot of people look at success as a
00:49:40.960
destination endpoint place. I want to own two Lamborghinis. I want to have $2 million cash.
00:49:47.240
I want to have a big house. I want to have a wife with big boobies and I want to, you know,
1.00
00:49:51.840
have an 80 inch TV screen and I'm successful. Okay. And that's what people think. And then when they
0.76
00:49:57.920
get there, they don't go through the things that they don't go through the mental process that we're
00:50:01.980
talking about here on this podcast, they, they stop and they say, dude, I made it. I'm here and
00:50:09.780
that's it. And then what happens? What happens? They lose it. Okay. It dwindles down. They stop
00:50:16.580
progressing. The people chasing you, catch you and beat you. And then you're starting over from
00:50:21.420
scratch, you know, and, and it, and it's a lot harder to start the ball rolling than it is to keep
00:50:27.740
rolling. That's the reality. So you have to understand that it's not a place that you just
00:50:33.320
get to. It's, it's a, it's a process. It's a point of reference along your journey that you can
00:50:40.360
reference at certain times, but you should always be looking to how you can improve, how you can give
00:50:45.500
more, how you can make people better. And if you do that, you'll always be successful. It'll always
00:50:51.100
come back to you. And, and people don't think of it like that. It's so annoying to me personally,
00:50:56.260
when people talk about it, like when they say things like this person is successful or this
0.95
00:51:01.520
person has made it, what the fuck does made it mean? What does made it mean? Ben, what the fuck
00:51:07.260
does it mean? I've never believed in that concept because you always got to be looking for the next
0.99
00:51:11.380
opportunity. It's that growth mindset that we talked about. I mean, the, the moment that people
00:51:16.580
say that they made it, they end up going backwards, which is the, which is the point that you're making.
00:51:20.740
You can only go forward and backwards. You can't stay at the same spot. That's what people don't
00:51:24.680
understand. And when they say you made it, I hate that term so much because I know that if someone
00:51:29.740
truly believes they made it, that it's only a matter of time before the world just shits on
0.97
00:51:33.920
it. It's just the way I've seen, how many times you've seen that in your life? You're 70 years old.
00:51:39.180
Many, many times. And I mean, it's okay to take a little vacation.
00:51:42.560
No question. I mean, I don't mean like go to Mexico. I'm saying take off. You, you wear yourself
00:51:48.080
down, you wear yourself out. You might not work as hard as you, as you could for a week or two or a
00:51:52.820
month. If you, if you take the vacation too long, the troops will get restless. So the shit happens,
00:51:59.460
boy, it'll happen everywhere. And then it happens fast. Then sweeping it up, sweeping up the mess is
1.00
00:52:04.080
like, Oh yeah. You know, I've been through it. I've been through it too, man. You, you, you, you get,
00:52:10.200
you have a little insurrection with the employees, uh, the women, you know, you don't show up for work.
1.00
00:52:16.820
They get mad at you. And no, for real. I mean, it's, and then it takes a long time to fix it.
00:52:22.660
Well, no, I mean, how many times you hear about it, guys, we see it all the time in the news,
00:52:25.880
right? These guys are super wealthy, super successful. A fucking year later, their life
00:52:31.700
is in shambles because just like success is a matter of momentum and moving forward. You create
0.99
00:52:38.180
that positive momentum. If you, like you said, the vacation, if you take that fucking vacation too long,
0.99
00:52:43.640
Oh man, dude, the momentum changes real quick. And that momentum of going down the wrong side of
0.98
00:52:51.160
the mountain, you know, going backwards that goes just as fast as it did, you know, when it was
00:52:57.020
going well, I told Andrew some time ago, and I've told him this a couple of times, some of the things
00:53:02.760
I told him there was, there was one was it's a little, it's a little white lie. Cause once you get
00:53:06.720
on a merry-go-round, you can't get off that son of a bitch, man. And if you do, that's that vacation.
1.00
00:53:12.480
If you get off that vacation too long, you know, things will come, you know, it'll be, it'll change.
00:53:18.140
But, but, uh, what, when you're, when you're on a merry-go-round and it's rolling that roller
00:53:22.800
coaster, you just need to figure out how, I don't want to use the word enjoy, but how to make it,
00:53:28.700
uh, not to get to stress. Cause there is stress involved and it's, there is worry. And, and, uh,
00:53:35.440
well, one thing you, I think you realize, like I realized in my little story, I told him I have
00:53:39.380
pneumonia. One thing I realized that was really helpful for me was that I realized like how
00:53:45.820
important the people that I'm surrounded by in my day-to-day life were, I was like lonely,
00:53:52.680
you know, like I, I, I was like, dude, I didn't get to see Jason. I didn't get to see
00:53:58.180
Sal. I didn't see Chris, you know, I didn't care. I didn't see Tyler, you know, but, but,
00:54:04.460
uh, but the point was, is like, you know, I see these guys every day and until you're
00:54:08.580
away from them for a while, you, you forget how important they are and how, how good of
00:54:14.780
friends you are with them on a personal level, because they are your life as an entrepreneur,
00:54:19.280
the people that you're surrounded with. And, you know, that was one thing I took away that
00:54:24.520
really helped put things in perspective. Um, and I'm kind of embarrassed to say like,
00:54:30.480
that's when I, it took me that long to figure it out. But up until that point, you know,
00:54:34.460
it was kind of like, okay, we built this engine. The purpose of the engine is to make money,
00:54:38.080
right? The way we make money is by creating value. I knew all of those things, but what
00:54:42.140
I didn't appreciate was the personal part of success of the friendships that are made.
00:54:48.520
And the, I mean, you've told me this when you sold your company, that's what you miss.
00:54:51.500
We've talked about this a hundred times. When I sold a company, it was, it wasn't about
00:54:54.760
him missing money or the income or anything. It wasn't money. It wasn't, I was, I had 24
00:55:00.560
outside salesmen and 200 employees and, and I went to every football game, baseball game,
00:55:05.500
every freaking, you, you name any restaurant, you know, been there a hundred times or whatever
00:55:10.860
and name any amount of money you spent. Okay. We spent it. It's not, it wasn't about that,
00:55:15.280
but it was when I sold a company is I didn't have a purpose anymore. Right. I wasn't, I wasn't,
00:55:22.100
you know, nobody called, nobody cared because they're on the business. They got their own stuff
00:55:28.280
to take care of. Right. I didn't make them money. I didn't do anything for them or with them. And
00:55:32.040
it was different. It was, took me three years. It was depression really. Yeah. I, I, I get people
00:55:38.120
consult me all the time about, they want to sell their business. They want to do this. They want to do
00:55:42.200
that. And I, I always say, be very, very, very careful about what you really want. I mean,
00:55:47.700
why don't you fade off a little bit at a time, which I'm not saying I would do that. I'm saying
00:55:53.800
that you have to think about it. Well, yeah, but, but you kind of learned that a more difficult way
00:55:58.500
because you guys don't really know the story, but what had happened was he was in a pretty bad car
00:56:03.060
accident and they were in a situation, a stressful situation at work. And he kind of, you kind of made
00:56:08.940
a decision to sell the company. I knee jerked. Yeah. And a knee jerk reaction. And so he didn't
00:56:13.160
think about these things. So when he speaks about what he misses, he's speaking from experience,
00:56:18.340
you know, and, and, and I've been fortunate enough to hear that, but you know, until I went
0.99
00:56:22.920
through that myself, um, uh, in a little bitty way, you know, I realized, okay, fuck dude,
0.98
00:56:29.140
this is way more about just this being a business. This is, this is a lifestyle. And I mean, it,
0.99
00:56:34.720
it, it, in my business and, and I, it's in a business. It's not that it's that culture
00:56:41.240
thing I talk about and, and I just talked about it. It's you, you want to create something
00:56:47.420
that you're proud of that would, and we'll use the word success again, happiness. Every
00:56:51.320
one of your employees should be the best educated. It's a competitive spirit. You want to be the
00:56:55.360
best educated, the best trained. You, you want them to be the best and to be the best. And
00:57:00.180
if you do that, they, they are, they're right with you. They're the Marine going over the
00:57:04.680
wall. They're the football team, the line, the lineman or whatever. They're with you a
00:57:09.180
hundred percent. Yeah. There's all that camaraderie that's built and you build it and it's easy
00:57:13.780
to lose that real quick. Uh, it's, it's, uh, but, but people don't think about those things
00:57:19.720
when they think about like, Oh, when they think about like people that are not in that situation,
00:57:24.340
you know what they think about? I can sell my company and get $300 million and I could, what
00:57:28.440
the fuck are you going to do with $300 million? You're going to sit around and do what?
0.99
00:57:33.400
I'm exaggerating, but once you have a nice car, say two nice cars. Okay. And, and this
00:57:38.800
is no reflection on anything here. I just, it's a, it's a way of saying something, not
00:57:42.380
a, you got a nice house, you got a nice condo in Florida, you got a nice this. I mean, that
00:57:48.300
sounds like a lot of stuff, but, but really get past nice house, nice car, nice wife, and
00:57:56.000
then you get nice kids and, and you have maybe some more grandkids too, you know, but, but,
00:58:03.660
uh, uh, no, you enjoy those simple things of life. Getting up, I wake up happy every day.
00:58:09.480
I said this before, I wake up happy every day. And that little joke about you make my day.
00:58:14.280
It's true. And when I was in business, it was, there'd always be some son of a bitch trying
1.00
00:58:18.840
to unmake my day, you know, and, and, uh, but enjoying seeing Andrew, seeing Sal, seeing
0.98
00:58:25.940
Tyler right here, man. I like seeing that guy come over here.
00:58:28.400
That's because you wear the same color shorts he wears. You guys must have bought your shorts
00:58:32.900
There are a lot of girls on Snapchat that like seeing Tyler too.
00:58:35.580
Tyler's trying to hold my hand over here. Keep your hand off my knee.
00:58:39.280
He's sitting right next to me because you can't see this to both of your guys's point. I mean,
00:58:44.520
this is something you've said, uh, just countless, countless times. And, and you'll continue to say
00:58:49.200
because it's true that your success is largely determined by the people that you surround
00:58:53.920
yourself with. And then to your point, big John, excuse me, big Jim, big John, big Jim.
00:59:01.480
To your, to, to your point, big Jim. Uh, and that is that success is more than material. It's,
00:59:10.200
it's people. And, and that does sound cheesy and that does sound like rainbows and unicorns,
00:59:14.080
but it is, it's more than just the material. Okay. And it'll, you'll get it more and more as
00:59:19.640
he gets older because it gets more and more important. You're responsible for every one of
00:59:23.400
those people. And, and I didn't worry about this. I learned, I don't, I don't have any monkeys on my
00:59:29.340
back. I walked out of my place every day cause I didn't do anything that was bad. I mean, you know,
00:59:36.240
I made good decisions, good for me sometimes, but good decisions and good for everybody. And you
00:59:43.000
wait them, you, you put them on a scale and you wait them. What, what, what's good for the company?
00:59:47.960
But I was responsible and it took me almost to 40 years old to figure this out. I'm responsible
00:59:52.940
for what car they drive, what house they drive, every one of my employees, what school or kid
00:59:59.240
goes to, there's a social responsibility that comes along with running a company. And, and
01:00:04.260
when you see like the newscast, you know, all these rich guys, we should tax them to death.
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We should do this. We should do that. Most of those big businesses that become successful,
01:00:12.920
Microsoft and Apple, those people had that same culture. They, they, they treated those
01:00:17.440
people. Perfect. You know, Walmart, uh, whatever those, those were born on those that do the
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people criticize people like that camaraderie. They've never fucking done it. Yeah. Period.
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Okay. You're talking about some asshole who's sitting up on a fucking TV stage talking about
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how so-and-so and they look at the rich picture. It was rich motherfucker, blah, blah, blah. They
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01:00:41.340
don't think about the donations given. They don't think about the jobs created. They don't think
01:00:45.820
about the income created for these families or the food on the table. All they talk about
01:00:51.240
is, Oh, look at that guy and his fucking Rolls Royce. And dude, it's always for someone who's
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never fucking done it. Period. Guys, this is a great conversation, very far ranging and
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a lot of great stories. Let's, let's, uh, focus and sort of recap a little bit as you
01:01:05.240
know, I'm want to do. So basically, Andy, you're just saying that success, the bedrock principle
01:01:11.320
that we're talking about here is that you are the measure of your success. Success is not
01:01:15.800
about what you accomplish. It's not, it's not about, uh, how you compare to someone else if
01:01:21.460
you're not realizing your own true, true potential. So that's the bedrock principle.
01:01:25.780
Right. So then beyond that, what you said was that, that success is not something that
01:01:30.060
something that you did in the past or something that you're going to do in the future. It is
01:01:34.080
always about what you're doing now. Right. But then along with that, you said that the really
01:01:38.540
great thing about it is you can benefit from your, your past experiences. You can benefit
01:01:43.040
from this cumulative effort so that you sort of build momentum and, and really can kind
01:01:48.440
of hit your stride. So where I'd like to take it, if you're okay with, with this is,
01:01:52.340
is just to talk about, you know, bringing in something that Ben talks about in the mental
01:01:56.100
toughness playbook is that once again, we've talked about this before, we talk about it
01:01:59.740
again, this whole idea of success to be truly successful. You got to really look yourself
01:02:05.300
in the mirror and be honest. You know, you guys all know I'm fans of Gary Vaynerchuk.
01:02:11.180
I've, I've read, if you haven't read his books, read all of his books. The guy has an
01:02:15.220
awesome podcast. Um, he, he has the ask Gary V show, everything he does is solid
01:02:20.100
fucking gold. Um, but one thing he talks about, which I agree with a million percent
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is that if he could give the, if he could give away a skill, like you can make a skill
01:02:31.700
into like a pill or a shot and you could just give it to people, you know, he's like, cause
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he always talks about hustle. He's like, I wouldn't give him hustle. I wouldn't give him
01:02:38.940
drive. I wouldn't give him ambition. I give him self-awareness. Okay. And the reason
01:02:43.500
that you have to have self, and most people hear that and they're like, what the fuck
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is self-awareness? But this is where it's important. Okay. And I love how he brings
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that to the forefront as a principle that people need to have, because I have not heard
01:02:56.160
one other person talk about how important it is to have that. And you know, I could be
01:03:01.060
misunderstanding why he says this, but this is why I think it's important. Okay. Because
01:03:05.500
here's what happens. We're talking about fulfilling potential, which is something that
01:03:10.480
you only really know yourself. Right? So it's real easy to say, man, I'm doing my best
01:03:18.060
or man, I'm doing all I can. How many times do you hear that from someone who's maybe struggling
01:03:23.820
with some things and he's like, Hey man, you know, I'm doing everything I can. Or Hey dude,
01:03:28.500
I'm doing my best. 99.99% of the times you hear that shit. It is a fucking excuse. So you
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have to understand how to be so honest with yourself. Even if you fucking lie to other
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people about it, you've got to know in your heart, am I giving my best? Am I doing everything
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I can? Am I moving forward and giving at the rate that I am capable of? And being self-aware
01:03:59.580
means you have to fucking look yourself in the eye and say, no, I am not. And I can do
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more. Okay. Because here's what happens. People usually compare themselves to their peers. They
01:04:13.020
compare themselves to, which we just talked about not comparing yourself, but we all do
01:04:17.500
it. It's sometimes we have to stop ourselves doing it. But what we do and what most people
01:04:21.740
do is they compare themselves to people they work with. And they say, Oh, look, John over
01:04:27.760
there, you know, I'm doing more than him and Susie over there. I'm doing more than her.
01:04:32.440
So I'm fucking winning. No, you're not winning because what you're comparing yourself to is
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people who are doing the bare fucking minimum to get by or not get yelled at or not get fired
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or not get in trouble. So you're going to do an inch more work. So you look like the superstar
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at your place because you work with a bunch of fucking lazy motherfuckers. That's not fulfilling
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potential. And, and people, you will go to people like that and you will talk to them
01:04:58.440
and they'll say, dude, I'm doing my best. Look how good I'm doing. I'm doing so much better
01:05:01.300
than these guys. Doesn't matter. What matters is, is are you giving the amount that you have
01:05:08.080
to give? Because here's the reality of life guys. We're in a fucking competition, all of
01:05:12.760
us. And you guys, this is competitive. You guys look around your workplace and you say,
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dude, I'm the best here. And you think I'm going to be successful because I'm the best
01:05:21.440
here, but you're wrong because other places that you are not, there is people giving their
01:05:26.860
full potential and you're competing against them and you're not seeing effort they're giving.
01:05:31.720
And so when you get past where you are now, all of a sudden you're competing with someone
01:05:36.000
who's trained themselves on it. And when I say this, because this becomes a habit, all
01:05:40.800
right, giving your full potential becomes a habit because they train themselves on a daily
01:05:46.180
basis to do the best that they can. So eventually after many, many, many months and years of giving
01:05:53.400
all you can, you wake up and you do it without thinking about it. Okay. So the only person you
01:05:58.680
cheat by saying, Oh, I'm better than John and Susie over there. And I'm the best in my office
01:06:02.940
and go home and beat your chest. Like you're this fucking anomaly of hard work. The only person
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you're hurting is you because you're going to run into, you're going to run into this other
01:06:13.820
dude that works at this other company that you don't see because you're going to move
01:06:18.080
up your little company. And then you don't see this guy and he's going to fucking slaughter
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you. That's the bottom line. So you have to be able to look yourself in the eye and say,
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dude, am I giving all I can? Because only, you know, if you are. And the question for most
01:06:32.180
people, the answer to that question from 99% of people listening and the people in this room
01:06:40.440
So I got a question for everybody. How bad do you want it? You know, Vaughn likes talking
01:06:45.600
about the mental toughness playbook and you know, everybody can get a free copy of it,
01:06:49.380
right? We're not selling it free playbook.net go download it for free. But here's an action
01:06:53.780
step we wanted to give to each and every single one of you. And the challenge is how bad do
01:06:58.040
you want it? And are you willing to look yourself in the mirror and talk about the truth of where
01:07:02.080
you are? The first mental training tool in that book is called attaining belief in yourself.
01:07:06.540
It doesn't mean we're saying you don't believe in yourself. It's about where you are right
01:07:11.080
now. What is the truth of your situation? And what can you do to get to that next level?
01:07:17.580
That's what it's all about. It's about attaining belief in yourself and connecting to the truth,
01:07:21.900
which is what you're saying. If you're not willing to connect to the truth of where you are,
01:07:25.480
there's no way in hell you're going to get to where you think you can go. You have to have purpose,
01:07:30.320
which big Jim mentioned, there has to be purpose. And the purpose will give you the fuel
01:07:34.440
in order to drive that truth to the vision that you can achieve.
01:07:37.500
And the self-awareness comes in because you have to have a realistic measure of what you're doing.
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If you're not, I mean, most people fucking lie to themselves. I don't have any other way to say
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that. Most people lie to themselves. They think they're doing way more than they actually are.
01:07:52.820
They think they're capable of much less than they actually are. And they lie. And in order to be
01:07:58.560
ultimately successful in your life, because at the end of your life, you're going to look back and you're
01:08:03.060
going to say, that's when you will be self-aware by default, because you're going to go back and
01:08:07.760
you're going to give yourself an honest evaluation at that point. Cause you're like, fuck, it's over.
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And you're going to look back and you'll say, dude, I could have done a lot more.
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I'm going to fucking, I'm going to fucking die knowing that I could have done a lot more.
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And, and all, and honestly, I can't think of anything worse than that.
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This, this is one of the reasons diving into these types of topics to really have people
01:08:28.320
recognize that potential is why I'm so excited to really be able to travel the world,
01:08:32.760
to be able to do this, do it anyway tour, to be able to spend a whole day with all of our listeners.
01:08:37.720
We're going to get as close as we can to all of you in different regions.
01:08:40.940
Not too close. Don't get in my, don't get in my personal space.
01:08:43.960
There's nothing worse than fucking face talkers. Don't face talk me, man.
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So when we're, when, when we kick this off in St. Louis on November the 6th, don't,
01:08:53.660
Well, dude, it's weird, man. Like, I feel like they're going to, like,
01:08:55.940
I feel like people that face talk are going to fucking kiss me.
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It's a fucking weirdest thing. Like if you're a face, we're talking about self-awareness.
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Be aware of how far away you are from another man's face that isn't into other men.
01:09:08.120
I'm going to start doing that. When I debrief you, I'm just going to sit right next to you.
01:09:11.640
Like God, it's fucking weird. Anyway, don't irritate.
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Everybody, everybody, everybody now knows when we come to visit you,
01:09:20.920
but that's part of what Andy and I, we want to spend a whole day.
01:09:23.500
This is not easy, right? I mean, what you're talking about, this is not easy.
01:09:26.540
It's not a flip of a switch. I mean, you have to choose to work on it.
01:09:29.700
We're summarizing here. That's the point. You've got to work on it.
01:09:31.900
When we do the tour, we're going to get in depth on how you can achieve these things, okay?
01:09:35.740
Because there's making you aware of the concept,
01:09:38.400
and then they're showing you how to execute on the concept.
01:09:41.180
So the tour, and I mean, I guess this is a pitch for the tour,
01:09:44.420
but if you have an opportunity to come to the tour,
01:09:48.640
and then we're going to cover the how to execute on these concepts.
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Yeah, I mean, so there's four dates right now.
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We're getting ready to announce the rest of the schedule,
01:10:04.240
I think we should call it the MFCEO tour beyond the Thunderdome.
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And we can wear, like, the fucking Thunderdome costumes.
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Like, dude, I'll be the dude that, like, you could be Tina Turner,
01:10:18.700
and I'll be the dude that has the dude on his shoulder,
01:10:31.820
And then we'll be in Toronto, Canada, January the 15th,
01:10:35.160
Miami, February the 6th, Orlando, February the 7th,
01:10:39.380
and then we'll be announcing dates in Austin, L.A., Chicago,
01:10:42.360
and then we're going to have a huge event at the end of the year
01:10:44.540
for those that attend the previous event in Las Vegas,
01:10:47.620
kind of like a big reunion kickoff to just really enjoy this time together
01:10:51.160
to continue to grow, because that's what we want.
01:10:53.640
We want to spend time with you so that you can achieve your unrealized potential
01:11:00.880
Forget about the – I hope that's what everybody's pulling from this.
01:11:03.420
When you hear Andy get fired up, he does not want you to be content.
01:11:10.640
We want you to continue to grow and challenge yourself.
01:11:13.420
Hey, Ben, maybe I'm out of turn here, but as you mentioned those different tour dates,
01:11:18.060
if people want to get involved to help, can they,
01:11:22.040
or is there really nothing to do in terms of help and plan and that sort of thing?
01:11:25.680
You know, I think for Andy and I, we've got a great team.
01:11:31.140
I mean, that's the most – the best thing you can do is come and dive in.
01:11:38.920
You know, Andy and I don't have to take the time to travel around.
01:11:43.040
He could sit in front of his TV and make money, right?
01:11:46.280
So he doesn't have to do this, but that is him recognizing his unrealized potential.
01:11:52.560
If I don't fucking do it, who's going to do it?
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The whole world is going to turn into a bunch of fucking zombie pussy video gamers.
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01:11:58.880
But once again, as we talked about earlier, that's a rule that you learn from Big Jim.
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01:12:02.820
So you say who's going to – that's your mindset that you've adopted.
01:12:11.760
We're getting long-winded, and guys, you know, Ben's right.
01:12:14.820
We do this because we have a passion for it, you know.
01:12:17.960
But what I want you to realize is that if you take anything from this podcast, it's that you are ultimately responsible for your own success.
01:12:28.320
And your chances of success are profoundly affected by your peer group.
01:12:33.020
You know, we've talked about this on previous podcasts.
01:12:35.580
We've talked about this many a times here and there on the internet and on – follow me on Periscope.
01:12:42.080
But if you're not surrounding yourself with the people that push you forward, okay?
01:12:54.540
And you've got two kinds of people in your boat.
01:13:02.280
They make you – they point out your unrealized potential to you, and it might piss you off.
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But they force you to fucking look at that space that you're not looking at to where you could fill it and do something, all right?
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I'm not talking about the people who make your life easy.
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01:13:20.260
I'm not talking about your buddies you drink beer with who tell you how fucking great you are.
01:13:24.380
I'm talking about people that force you to see your unrealized potential and force you to act in that way.
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01:13:35.780
Those are your motherfucking buddies that you drink beer with that tell you how great you are.
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01:13:39.840
That's your girlfriend who nags you about how much you work.
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That's your people who tell you, you can't fucking do that, all right?
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01:13:48.180
And you have to eliminate the anchors from the boat if you want to get it moving fast, all right?
01:13:54.380
You want the boat to go fast, you want a bunch of fucking propellers, and not many anchors.
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01:14:00.840
So make sure that you're surrounding yourself with people who are going to push you.
01:14:07.480
You know, it's going to make you feel at some times like you're a loser.
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01:14:10.680
Like I was talking to Steve this morning, like we talked about a little bit ago.
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01:14:13.900
You know, when I go to a party sometimes or go to an event,
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01:14:18.100
I'm around people who are so much further down the path that I am that I'm like, fuck.
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01:14:25.280
That uncomfortable feeling doesn't get me depressed.
01:14:28.240
It makes me go home and harness that energy into things that are productive, you know?
01:14:33.500
So make sure that you're surrounding yourself with the right people.
01:14:44.320
And, guys, there's a lot of, like, unwarranted loyalty towards people.
01:14:49.320
Like, oh, what about my lifelong friends that don't support me?
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01:14:52.960
Well, dude, if they don't fucking support you, guess what?
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01:14:58.160
You need to redefine what you see as a friend as opposed to thinking you have some sort of moral obligation to somebody
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01:15:04.100
because you've known them since they were fucking three.
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01:15:14.420
This is a very in-depth, lifelong concept to kind of understand and progress on.
01:15:34.320
Because if you do look at it and you get to that point, not only are you not going to be happy,
01:15:39.120
you're going to die with a lot of regret, and you're going to lose what you have
01:15:42.260
because you're not continually moving forward and you don't understand how to improve from that point.
01:15:46.960
Because if you're not moving forward, you're going backwards.
01:16:01.900
Big Jim, for me, I would just, the takeaway for me is rules versus lessons, right?
01:16:07.240
And surround yourself with the people who are wanting to bring out the best in you.
01:16:13.020
I'd just like to say to the people, talking to the people out there that we're talking to,
01:16:20.000
If you don't do it yourself, nobody's going to do it for you.
01:16:22.440
You've got to look in that mirror of self-awareness and say exactly who you are.
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Because talking about it isn't going to do shit for you.
01:16:29.000
You've got to act on it and act on these principles.
01:16:36.160
But you've got to live and have a competitive spirit and move on with your life.