REAL AF with Andy Frisella - SUNDAY SERMON： How to Disagree Without Despising Each Other, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO274

00:00:00.000 the people that are running after their dream know they're going to have hard times they keep

00:00:07.260 on running because they're saying within themselves i'm the one i'm the one no matter

00:00:12.420 how bad it is or how bad it gets i'm going to make it what is up guys you're listening to the 0.94

00:00:23.480 mf ceo project i'm andy i'm your host and i am the motherfucking ceo guys today is sunday sermon 0.77

00:00:32.880 i'm here with my co-host vaughn otherwise known as dj dj god only on sundays that's right what's 0.90

00:00:41.020 up dude uh a lot of things are up took my great boner hey dude look dude i was thinking last night

00:00:49.780 i was watching uh um there's a good netflix series my buddy my buddy uh chris prada who's a plastic

00:00:57.480 surgeon he does all the fake titties here in town which i think would be an awesome one sal's wife 0.99

00:01:02.540 works for no no no that's not that's mike niac okay he's a plastic surgeon too but he's in their

00:01:07.140 their buddies but anyway that's how i met uh chris dr prada from niac but uh talk about two great

00:01:14.260 business guys fuck man yeah great business dudes uh good dudes too but uh he recommended us to watch

00:01:23.820 this uh mini series or a documentary series a netflix original called medal of honor all right 0.97

00:01:30.340 i just saw that advertised okay yeah it's good is it really good yeah it's good so like what it is

00:01:36.680 is like it's like the stories of medal of honor recipients told by other guys who also won the

00:01:46.580 medal of honor for something else so like one guy who's won the medal of honor is narrating the story

00:01:51.480 and while he's narrating it they have like a like actors that's awesome okay it's really cool

00:01:57.880 uh but what are some of the things that you have to do to get the medal of honor um

00:02:04.840 you have to go above and beyond uh the call of duty uh you have to risk your own life and there

00:02:12.080 has to be witnesses okay and that's that those were the three things that they said in the

00:02:16.820 documentary now there might be more yeah but they said it's very hard to determine um the difference

00:02:24.460 between somebody who gets uh the award right below the medal of honor and the because there's so many

00:02:31.560 guys that do crazy heroic stuff right so i just first of all if you're into that kind of stuff

00:02:39.020 like band of brothers you ever seen that oh yeah that's my favorite series ever that's an incredible

00:02:43.720 one and then the one that's kind of the counterpart to that isn't too bad the pacific did you ever

00:02:48.320 watch yeah yeah yeah the band of brothers though is just i think that's the best one ever it's

00:02:52.140 awesome well i'm all about world war ii okay so you'll love this all right because it also covers

00:02:56.980 like modern metal medal of honor recipients it's not just like it's old and new guys who were past

00:03:03.120 guys who are still living it's just really cool that's awesome um but dude i was i was watching it

00:03:09.780 and uh one of this at the end of this each series they show the actual ceremony where they get the

00:03:17.480 medal of honor and then read uh the citation of the description of what they did and dude

00:03:24.560 it's no secret that like i tend everybody that listens to this knows that i tend to lean towards

00:03:31.560 conservative we talked about this on last sunday i think i can't really remember what we talked about 0.59

00:03:36.680 because i was in the middle of a fucking rant but uh people liked it yeah well i believe well dude it's 0.96

00:03:42.420 the fucking truth and everybody knows it's the truth yeah okay i don't even want to get started 0.98

00:03:47.020 because i will go off certainly when it comes to national defense you are conservative well i'm just 0.99

00:03:52.180 fiscally conservative and i'm socially liberal i'm more of a libertarian but i lean towards voting to

00:03:56.820 the right because the left is so fucking aggressive with pushing their views on people right that i 0.90

00:04:02.380 don't i don't believe in that right like i believe in live and let live like if you could do your thing 0.79

00:04:07.260 do your thing you don't need to push it on me yeah all right that's not equality equality is we all get

00:04:11.780 to do what the fuck we want to do right all right so um anyway so i never voted for obama and i quite 0.99

00:04:21.240 honestly i thought he was a terrible fucking president terrible in every fucking way terrible 0.99

00:04:25.320 for the country's culture terrible for race relations terrible for the economy i think he's the worst 1.00

00:04:31.100 fucking president that ever lived he's up there for sure okay and and and if you look at the statistics 0.99

00:04:36.760 that's not an argument that can be argued okay the stats don't fucking lie numbers wise it is what 0.99

00:04:44.180 it is right but here's what i here's what i remember thinking as i was watching him 0.91

00:04:48.720 i'd like to have a fucking beer with that guy absolutely you know what i'm saying yeah like people 0.93

00:04:55.280 think because i didn't vote for him and i think he was a bad president that i somehow hate him 0.98

00:04:59.340 no like dude i don't hate him and dude bill clinton too like i would i would rather have a beer with

00:05:04.920 you know what though i would like to have a beer with obama and bill clinton yeah and you know what

00:05:08.880 i didn't vote for either one of them right and the thing is is like uh i i just think that it's weird

00:05:17.480 today because i remember i was sitting there and i'm thinking my god he just seems like a cool dude

00:05:24.440 like and and he does seem like a cool dude like he seems like a guy i would fucking drink a beer with 0.97

00:05:30.400 that we would joke around shoot some fucking hoops talk shit smokes of cigarettes you know what i'm 0.98

00:05:35.780 saying maybe smoke some weed like you know if nobody was fucking watching you know what i'm saying 0.99

00:05:40.200 like he just seems like he seems like a cool fucking dude yeah and uh and i think it's interesting and 0.92

00:05:44.980 it got me thinking um how it's interesting today that if you disagree with someone's motives or you 0.94

00:05:57.000 disagree with their politics or you disagree with what they believe that somehow they have to be

00:06:02.960 your enemy right you have to hate them yeah and like why is that what is that like where where did

00:06:09.520 where did it go that like you and i as grown men who have totally different worldviews can have

00:06:17.480 different points of view about what we've experienced and what we believe and all of these things that

00:06:25.400 quite honestly um are trivial

00:06:30.260 compared to what we have in common right okay because we have much more in common than we do

00:06:37.080 different and that and if you were a black man it would be the same right if you were an asian man

00:06:41.400 it would be the same if you were a woman it'd be the same we have far more in common

00:06:45.220 than we do to fight about right but human nature at least human culture culture over the last

00:06:53.080 and i do think obama had a part in this honestly over the last 12 years or so

00:07:01.420 has become so polarizing and divisive that it makes

00:07:07.100 us believe that if we disagree with someone's point of views that we don't like that person or we can't 0.99

00:07:16.860 hang out with that person or we can't go to dinner with that person or we can't like their shit on social 0.90

00:07:21.400 media you know what i mean and like like they're you're either all the way with me or you're all 0.98

00:07:26.480 the way against me and that's it right you know and i think that's yeah i think that's a shame it is a

00:07:31.020 shame i think it's i think it really is because somehow we've let the extremes dictate what's the

00:07:37.360 normal policy in america like i mean i experienced this as a pastor i used to hang out with a lot of

00:07:44.660 people that were were not very good christian people and and there were more jesus yeah and

00:07:49.800 yeah exactly and there were there were really really conservative people in my congregation this

00:07:54.460 wasn't the majority but there were really really conservative people like hyper conservative that'd be

00:07:59.020 like why are you why are you hanging out with these guys but is it bavon isn't your job as as a leader

00:08:05.420 of the church to help people improve yeah they thought that by me they thought that by me hanging

00:08:12.360 out with guys that were radically different that i was somehow approving of what they did or said

00:08:18.220 and i and i think that's crazy but of course the exact opposite extreme is the liberals who say

00:08:23.100 you only love me and really value me if you subscribe to what i say like which is not true and i honestly i'm

00:08:31.460 i won't get into this but i do think that there are certain people with certain kinds of lifestyle

00:08:35.640 that they either say you approve of it you celebrate it or you hate me no you don't you don't have to

00:08:41.400 approve or celebrate and you don't have to hate either right exactly you know so my question is why do

00:08:47.540 people like you and me why do we have friends that are all over the spectrum and i do yeah and i do too

00:08:54.940 and and i why do we have friends who are all over the spectrum i talk to on a regular basis who are 0.91

00:09:00.280 dude i have people that represent my company that are extreme fucking liberal feminists extreme right 1.00

00:09:08.140 like the furthest i know exactly who you're thinking okay and you know what dude they represent 0.97

00:09:14.480 their views in a respectful manner and they're they have logical discussions and i can respect that

00:09:20.900 now do i agree with those viewpoints no i don't agree with a lot of the things that are said but that

00:09:27.180 doesn't mean that we can't work together we can't do things productive together we can't be friends

00:09:31.440 can't have drinks can't have a dinner can't support each other you know and i think that's something

00:09:37.060 that really i think that's a big problem with uh with our culture right now you know kind of

00:09:44.780 continuing on from what we talked about last sunday where we you know basically just went off on all the

00:09:49.540 problems i've had some time and you've had some time to talk about some of the maybe the actual

00:09:55.040 causes and the causes yeah on a on a person by person basis right and i think that's what we're

00:10:00.780 talking about here is that you know we have to recover the lost art of disagreeing with one

00:10:08.600 another without despising one another and there are there are many ways to do that uh but they require

00:10:15.100 maturity and they require logic and they require understanding and tolerance and compassion which

00:10:22.340 by the way are all the things that the extreme left preach right but they don't exercise you know

00:10:30.380 what i mean yeah i agree man i i grew up i mean i'm i'm getting old i'm older than most people in our in

00:10:35.600 our uh in our listening audience and the truth is is that i remember being a young kid and all the

00:10:43.740 democrats that i knew all the liberals that i knew they were the ones that were protecting free speech

00:10:48.840 they were the ones that were saying like no you ought to be able to share that and not have

00:10:53.360 somebody jump all over you and in some ways it was the hyper conservative people that wanted to like

00:10:58.220 censor people i remember you know yeah and now it's gotten to where liberalism has become this like

00:11:02.920 if you don't toe the line with political correctness if you speak your mind you are censored

00:11:07.520 right and and we only tolerate that which like it's almost like they assume that we all really think

00:11:13.800 what they think right we're scared to say it's crazy and the worst the worst thing about it the worst

00:11:18.880 thing about it is is that it's like literally that whole mindset has completely infested our

00:11:25.960 university system oh yeah so all the people i'm not all of them but they're by and large you know

00:11:31.120 these kids go to these state universities and there's not really a healthy marketplace of ideas

00:11:35.740 there's the really off the rocker professor who's espousing his views and if you question him or any of

00:11:41.660 the really active liberal groups on campus you're somehow a hate monger or you're a bigot or racist

00:11:47.520 or whatever you can't raise any legitimate questions and the funny thing and what that what those people

00:11:52.240 don't understand is that by attacking people for questioning what they believe with those sort of

00:12:00.200 attacks all you're doing is removing the validity of those statements like now the term racist doesn't

00:12:07.620 mean what it meant five years ago right eight years ago right like everybody everybody is everybody's

00:12:12.920 a racist have you have you heard about what this what's happened and i'm using this as an example

00:12:17.600 but have you heard about what's happened with this this young asian girl at the university of

00:12:21.720 california berkeley her name is isabella wong or something like that well there was a there was a big

00:12:26.960 like student government vote and it was on something i don't i don't know what it was but it was on

00:12:31.840 something about the whole transsexual issue and what she did is she she's a student senator and 1.00

00:12:37.260 what she did was she said hey listen i have all the love in the world um for all different kinds of

00:12:44.020 people wherever they're coming from but me personally from my personal point of view i believe that they're

00:12:50.580 really only two genders man and woman and so i can't in good conscience vote for whatever this

00:12:56.680 whatever they were voting for sounds reasonable right i mean she's just speaking up to it for her

00:13:02.640 thing she has been absolutely vilified like she's been called a hate monger she's been called anti this 0.96

00:13:09.920 and anti that because she actually thinks that there's two genders instead of 27 genders um it's 1.00

00:13:16.340 and again i'm not getting into who's right and who's wrong on that issue what i'm getting into is that if

00:13:20.240 you read what she said it was very it was expressed very respectfully very lovingly and let and yet she is

00:13:25.660 being tarred and feathered like in the media in the media really at california berkeley like there's

00:13:31.180 all these student groups that are calling her a hate monger and that she's anti you know transsexual 0.95

00:13:36.340 or whatever whatever but it just goes the point being is that how have we gotten to a point in our

00:13:43.060 culture where we can't like legitimately express ourselves in very honorable uh respectful you know

00:13:50.840 loving ways without all of a sudden somebody coming back and saying no you're a hate monger or

00:13:55.400 you're you know homophobic or whatever that's an easy argument it's easy it's easy to call someone

00:14:02.240 a bigot it's easy to call someone a racist it's easy to say you're fear mongering or hate mongering

00:14:08.520 it's easy to say someone's a homophobe but what's not easy is to sit down and examine their argument

00:14:16.100 their argument and then also examine your own argument yeah and then see what pieces fit where

00:14:22.980 that takes thought that takes reflection and it takes humility and there's not a lot of those

00:14:28.280 things going around right now no not at all uh you know it's interesting um well i was saying we you and

00:14:34.060 i both we have we have lots of friends who are on a wide variety of a spectrum and on the one hand we

00:14:38.540 get along with all of them on the other hand we're not actually saying that you know the differences

00:14:45.000 between what you believe and what i believe we're not saying oh they don't matter we're striking that

00:14:49.500 balance between saying hey what we believe on this does matter and our differences do matter but

00:14:55.240 they don't keep us from engaging one another in friendship you know so my question is why is it

00:15:02.060 that you and i and a lot of people like us are able to do that but the vast majority of people aren't

00:15:05.920 like why don't why i don't consider myself super special i don't think i'm like super unique in my

00:15:12.700 ability to get along with people but it does seem like what we well let's be exercise in our own

00:15:18.780 lives is increasingly rare let's be real dude okay uh i was just on phone with randall pitch right as i

00:15:27.380 was driving up to the headquarters today and we were we were talking and we were laughing about how like

00:15:34.120 we were actually talking about this exact thing uh but we were laughing at how um you know

00:15:41.660 if you we were literally having almost this exact same conversation uh but we were laughing about

00:15:51.600 how like dude neither one of us will go on facebook very much anymore and the reason why we don't go on 0.96

00:15:56.620 facebook is because the amount of stupidity and negativity and it's so negative that like when 0.90

00:16:03.900 you're busy you've got to be conscious about what you allow in your brain because if you let those 0.99

00:16:13.700 things take a space in your brain that's less space for things that are going to be productive and you

00:16:17.560 just can't do that because we're like anybody else dude uh you know i could read something online and 0.90

00:16:22.440 it can infuriate me and cause me the next three hours to be concerned with shit that really doesn't 0.86

00:16:27.740 fucking matter and um we were laughing you know i think the first difference of what you're asking 0.98

00:16:36.040 on that question is that dude first of all you got to believe you got to understand all right what 0.97

00:16:41.840 we're bombarded with on a daily basis is literally and i don't say this to be mean but it's literally the 0.95

00:16:49.380 one percent lowest intelligence of the world the malcontents of the world absolutely so we see the dumbest 1.00

00:16:56.720 people arguing with the dumbest motherfucking people right okay and then we're and then what 0.99

00:17:00.600 we assume is that everybody's like that but the truth is is that most people are keeping their 0.99

00:17:05.220 mouth shut like you and i and they're having logical conversations so first off don't think that just 0.99

00:17:11.100 because and i'm talking to myself here too don't think just because you see this shit everywhere 0.99

00:17:15.600 it's how everybody is because it's not true right okay um second of all uh i believe that like 0.95

00:17:24.800 you know intelligent people especially you know once you grow up a little bit um and and when i say

00:17:35.320 grow up i mean like you know you start to think for yourself okay instead of like looking to other

00:17:43.660 places for validation or looking to the news uh because dude let's be real the media has an agenda

00:17:49.540 and their agenda is to be extreme okay uh that's why you know we have all these shootings is because 0.99

00:17:56.380 the fucking media sensationalizes the fucking shootings and these kids who are lost think that 0.99

00:18:02.620 their only way to be relevant is to do shit like that if the media would be responsible media and 1.00

00:18:08.600 promote shit that was actually productive and positive in an unbiased format we would have a lot 0.99

00:18:14.380 less of these fucking things going on yeah and and the truth of it is is that we're going to watch 0.99

00:18:19.160 the media's message no matter what so um it's it's a commitment that that they got away from you know 0.98

00:18:29.260 it used to be the news used to be and when you went to school for journalism it was learn how to report 0.84

00:18:36.460 what what does that mean that means observe right and fucking say what happened and let the people 0.75

00:18:44.000 decide what they think about it now when you go to journalism school it's about how to make a spin 0.90

00:18:51.360 so that you can get the spotlight on you and and position yourself as some sort of authority so that

00:19:00.320 you could move up and get your own show and become dude if you if you watch these people on the news

00:19:05.880 and you take a step back and you watch them and not listen to what they're saying you can truly see

00:19:11.360 that they're in it for themselves absolutely they're in it to become a star they want to be the bill o'reilly

00:19:17.380 they want to be uh the uh rachel maddow they want to be those people so how do they become those people by 0.99

00:19:25.260 acting like those people on every fucking story that they get you see this shit in sports how many times 0.99

00:19:31.700 in sports do you see somebody make a three-yard fucking run and the guy calling the play is trying 1.00

00:19:37.540 to make it sound like he just won the super bowl you know what i mean right oh he's about to oh he 0.99

00:19:42.240 got tackled and you know like dude it's the most annoying shit in the world but all that is is them 1.00

00:19:47.740 trying to progress themselves and by them trying to progress themselves they are feeding us shit 0.99

00:19:53.360 that hurts us absolutely it hurts our ability to relate to people it makes us think poorly of 0.94

00:19:59.600 people it makes us think that issues that are my minor issues are massive issues right and if dude 0.99

00:20:07.400 if you watch the news black people and white people fucking hate each other right all of them all of 1.00

00:20:12.200 them yeah like yeah like all the black dudes in the warehouse they fucking hate all the white dudes 1.00

00:20:16.680 that's why they're back there fighting right now right right they're having a fucking race war in a 1.00

00:20:20.480 fucking back room if you watch the news that's what would be on the news yeah you know 17 white 1.00

00:20:25.700 guys beat up four black guys right in a racial racially motivated snowball fight right you know 1.00

00:20:31.060 because we just had a snowball fight this morning but like dude that's the shit that that you know 1.00

00:20:36.180 people the dumb people watch and then people put ads yeah you know and and more than that they'll 0.99

00:20:42.820 leave it in this in the situation you just described they'll find the one representative of his or 0.99

00:20:48.900 her race who's like the worst possible guy and they'll pluck that guy so they'll find the one 1.00

00:20:52.920 they'll they'll say uh one black man complained that the that the snow was white you know yeah no 1.00

00:20:59.460 and then like zoom in on that guy so that and then white people read that and they're like man stupid 1.00

00:21:04.180 you know you know what god's god's fucking racist dude you know why because he made snow white yeah 0.99

00:21:09.380 right exactly no it's just crazy but you know what that reminds me i i don't know if you'd be up for 0.99

00:21:14.140 this someday but i news has been so biased for so long that people are so so used to it

00:21:21.980 someday we ought to have a a show just about here's how to read the newspaper no here's how to pick up

00:21:28.440 on the bias because there are certain words that are telltale indicators that this this isn't a

00:21:33.920 headline dude this is a this is a statement of opinion people exactly by the way the new york 0.99

00:21:39.100 times is one of the worst offenders of it vaughn you're a fucking you're a writer you studied this 0.99

00:21:44.660 shit dude i truly truly believe that most people do not know how to watch the news and pick up the 1.00

00:21:55.220 bias i feel like they they feel like i should be able to trust the news what they're saying is true 0.99

00:22:00.900 and and that's why people who watch whatever station right regurgitate that shit 0.97

00:22:06.360 you know over and over and that becomes their beliefs like they truly believe it's the truth 0.99

00:22:12.240 right it is not the fucking truth and you have to be smart enough to be able to step above 0.89

00:22:17.880 and and think on your own and to answer your question what's the difference i i really think 0.96

00:22:24.240 besides all those little things we just mentioned the biggest thing is that once you grow up and you

00:22:28.720 start thinking for yourself and you develop the ability to rise above and look down and decide what's

00:22:34.040 what on your own right then you start to become very secure in your beliefs that's a key okay and

00:22:41.680 so when you become secure in your beliefs you don't feel the need to push them on other people

00:22:48.580 because it's not about other people it's about what you believe right it's about what your family

00:22:52.780 represents okay how am i going to raise my kids how am i going to run my company how am i going to

00:22:57.840 teach the people who follow me what message do i represent what core values do i stand for and when you

00:23:03.500 become solid there you spend zero effort arguing with people that disagree and you don't mind with

00:23:09.620 people disagree because you know what i know what i am i know what i represent i know what i'm about 0.96

00:23:15.960 so i don't need outside validation from joe blow on fucking facebook absolutely i mean 0.97

00:23:21.980 what would you do if if some 18 year old punk said to you hey andy uh 0.99

00:23:30.060 you don't know anything about building a business i would ignore it you would ignore it i would you

00:23:37.800 might get mad in the sense of get irritated but would you get offended no no why would you why

00:23:42.580 would you not get offended i know i know how to run a business right because you know it it's like 0.99

00:23:46.160 if somebody said to me dude i would i i get people to say that i have people to say that shit 0.97

00:23:50.520 like i have people to say that shit on my instagram literally every time i post oh dude you know what 1.00

00:23:56.020 you just got fucking lucky doing that you're just another fucking snake oil salesman that got lucky 1.00

00:24:00.100 blah blah blah like dude i just fucking block the motherfuckers right you know like and it's it's like 1.00

00:24:05.520 if somebody were to say to me you know you suck i don't even respond i just fucking block them 0.99

00:24:10.060 like it's not and then like i block them and then usually what happens is i'll get dude it's funny 0.99

00:24:16.380 because emily hates this shit by the way don't do this what i'm about to say bless you well 0.90

00:24:23.520 that was a big sneeze bless you god bless you thank you thank you i need it uh so uh but dude 0.98

00:24:35.220 they'll dm emily and they'll say your husband blocked me i was in a bad mood i don't know what 0.99

00:24:40.920 i was doing could you ask him to unblock me you know what the answer is no no don't be an asshole 0.99

00:24:45.680 right you know what i'm saying so um but i just feel like the more secure 0.98

00:24:51.140 you are the less you feel the need to defend yourself absolutely you know absolutely i can

00:24:58.780 say with a clear conscience and i'm not and i'm not you know we've talked about but don't you think

00:25:01.980 that comes with with with learning to think for yourself i think it comes with learning to think

00:25:06.200 for this yourself but i also think it comes with just taking the time to evaluate your own opinions

00:25:12.040 and your own beliefs it's not just thinking for yourself but it's actually giving some time to

00:25:16.680 studying what you say you believe for instance i know i get it i know that there are very very very

00:25:22.280 smart people out there who literally do not believe that there is a god but i've studied it enough i've

00:25:27.440 studied the arguments for and against that if somebody were to come up to me and would go dude 0.96

00:25:31.060 you're an idiot god doesn't exist it's that's just i wouldn't be offended which is not offended by 0.99

00:25:37.100 that that's probably an argument that you hear right i hear that all the time and i'm not offended 1.00

00:25:40.980 that by that because i'm secure in my own beliefs because i've taken time to study it i've taken time

00:25:45.360 to evaluate i'm not i'm not in a million years saying that i am infallible and that i couldn't

00:25:50.340 possibly in any way shape or form be wrong but i've studied enough that i'm not offended if somebody

00:25:55.600 says that i'm not offended if somebody says any number of things against my religion because it's

00:26:00.520 okay it doesn't mean that first of all i think people have lost the fine art of somebody attacking

00:26:06.380 their views without them thinking they're attacking them that's because of the internet 0.86

00:26:10.560 yeah dude the argue dude people have lost the fine art of how to fucking argue absolutely like dude 0.89

00:26:16.740 how many times have you and you and i argued a lot yeah you and i have argued a lot yeah like people 0.67

00:26:22.080 don't ever really hear it but like dude we'll be talking about something and we'll get an argument 1.00

00:26:25.640 yeah but have i ever said hey vaughn you're a piece of shit you know that's where people people take 0.99

00:26:31.720 it from like an argument online that then it becomes it automatically goes from i disagree with 1.00

00:26:38.360 you to you're a fucking piece of shit right fuck you right you know it's like right dude if that's 1.00

00:26:43.980 the best way that you know how to argue you're gonna have to learn how to argue really well in life 1.00

00:26:49.300 because guess what life is it's a long series of fucking arguments it's it's tension it's conflict 0.94

00:26:54.620 and that's how you grow and uh yeah so basically what we're saying so far i guess is that if you want 0.96

00:26:58.940 to be able to have these and i agree with you by the way yeah yeah yeah like i think we're saying

00:27:02.460 sort of the same thing no no i 100 i just wanted to take a second because we've covered a lot of

00:27:06.720 things i'm just going to say for those of you who are following us because i'm sure you are but you

00:27:10.020 know when when two geniuses get on the get on you know sometimes it's hard to follow that's true

00:27:13.940 you know well at least when there's one genius yeah exactly one genius and one would be um but no i

00:27:18.540 think i think with the with the art what we're saying here is that if you want to have the kind of

00:27:22.800 relationships where you can disagree but still really connect as friends one you got to be

00:27:27.620 securing your your beliefs which is what andy was talking about and the second thing is i think

00:27:32.820 kind of reading between the lines of what you said is you've got to learn how to attack the problem or

00:27:37.620 attack the attack the the claim not the person don't don't make it personal just say hey we're

00:27:43.260 just arguing about some sort of issue and i have good i have good friends like really good friends 0.93

00:27:48.380 that i know i could call in a pinch yeah that completely disagree with everything i fucking absolutely 0.98

00:27:54.020 like about about my political views you know they're on complete opposite end yeah but if i 0.78

00:28:00.020 call them today they will fucking show up absolutely you know what i mean and we've lost that we have 0.97

00:28:05.900 it's it's crazy but um i i just it is sad but i do think it i do think at the end of the day 0.97

00:28:13.080 the reason that most people are offended is not because somebody said something that is objectively

00:28:18.580 offensive it's because they themselves are insecure absolutely and they are thin-skinned

00:28:24.020 and they take everything personally right and they you know and dude you want to flip it around 0.94

00:28:29.120 on someone like when they get all offended and they fucking get pissed off because this is what 0.94

00:28:32.940 people do right like what i just said you say something or you type something or you post something 0.99

00:28:37.540 they disagree and then they say vaughn you're a fucking retard right right right and you just say back 0.96

00:28:44.420 you want to flip it on someone you should say something like this hey uh i don't know what i 0.99

00:28:49.120 did to to to take it to that level i respect that you disagree but you know they don't know what to do

00:28:55.400 no need to get like that and you know what they'll do every time you're right bro i'm sorry yeah you

00:28:59.660 know what i mean yeah yeah well but but at first it'll kind of stun them yeah because they're being a 0.99

00:29:04.360 bigger person yeah absolutely now look i'm the first guy that wants to say fuck you brother 0.98

00:29:08.380 right like you know but the truth is is like i i don't really have the time or energy to deal with it 0.99

00:29:13.600 so i just block them but a lot of you guys like to argue with people so if you want to fuck with 0.97

00:29:17.520 them just yeah sort of agree with them be like yeah you know what sometimes i am retarded but i 0.94

00:29:22.420 don't think we need to take it there right now and they're like uh right but it is amazing though

00:29:27.500 that people have really lost the art of determining the difference between a statement that's an

00:29:33.420 objectively critical statement of a particular position or belief and something that's an insult

00:29:37.660 or or something that's truly offensive so for instance you know back in the day if somebody 1.00

00:29:43.740 if somebody said um you know some sort of racial slur they said oh you're just a stupid whatever 0.99

00:29:48.840 yeah well that is offensive okay but we've gotten to the point where if somebody says you know what 0.99

00:29:53.960 in evaluating the the antidotes for institutional racism in our country i actually don't feel like uh you

00:30:02.020 know affirmative action scholarships are really effective in helping that so that's just that's just

00:30:06.780 you're just making a statement about something you believe you're racist but you're racist right

00:30:11.480 and they don't they don't see the difference between stating an opinion on policy when i'm

00:30:16.760 actually making an insult yeah but when a real answer to that would be like you know what i don't

00:30:24.140 necessarily agree with that but there's probably some areas that we could improve on it right so

00:30:28.740 what are those areas you see i'm saying oh yeah yeah where's that conversation yeah like where's that

00:30:34.720 yeah well that would require once again a certain level of brain power and thinking right you know 1.00

00:30:40.700 what though dude i will say this on you're fucking honky yeah yeah you know yeah fucking racist honky 0.99

00:30:45.640 right you know we've we've been kind of tough on the on the left and by the way that goes both ways 0.99

00:30:50.880 yeah i was just about to say we've been kind of tough on the left the one thing that i get 1.00

00:30:53.760 really really frustrated because there's some fucking dumb motherfucking conservatives out there 1.00

00:30:57.480 absolutely it's like i was and there is some fucking fault as much as there is far left 1.00

00:31:02.260 ridiculous fucking dumb fucks there is the same amount of far right oh absolutely absolutely 0.99

00:31:09.240 and i think you do nothing but fucking stir the pot you know they're doing everything they can to be 1.00

00:31:14.760 to be offensive without actually saying offensive racial words right you know what i'm saying or like 0.98

00:31:21.560 divisive homophobic words it's like they say it without saying it just so you know guys listening 1.00

00:31:28.120 we don't like that shit either no absolutely that shit's fucking just as bad like the way you guys 1.00

00:31:34.300 see it uh like on the left is the same way that us in the middle you know white hand right see it too 1.00

00:31:40.280 yeah i absolutely i i we should honestly dude we should figure out a way to cut off like the the the 0.98

00:31:46.620 far left five percent and the far right five percent and like send those motherfuckers to different 1.00

00:31:51.120 islands and the rest of us could just be happy absolutely i agree you know it's um to kind of 0.96

00:31:57.600 illustrate that here's a perfect example while it is true that people take the whole there you know

00:32:02.320 there's a racist under every rock thing the flip side of that is that you know if you study our nation's

00:32:07.500 history like in 1921 50 000 clansmen uh congregated in washington dc and held a rally in like as late as

00:32:18.180 the 40s and 50s one in four of of the people that stayed of indiana i'm not picking on indiana because

00:32:23.580 hey i'm from kansas so we had some of our same issues but one in four were members of the kkk 0.90

00:32:28.720 holy shit oh yeah it's crazy really yeah one in four of of adult white males was a member of the kkk 0.88

00:32:36.540 wow um so and there's just been some like if you get into the i've i've i read the um the autobiography 0.99

00:32:42.380 of martin luther king i mean in the 50s and 60s there were literally white people blowing up black

00:32:47.600 churches and killing black kids and so when i hear somebody say today dude that was like 50 years

00:32:55.720 ago or just get over it you know like that wasn't that long ago that wasn't that long ago and we we 0.97

00:33:00.500 you know i do believe that this is the greatest country the world has ever seen that said it

00:33:06.220 doesn't mean we're perfect that's right it doesn't mean we can't learn from our mistakes right and just

00:33:10.380 to sort of casually dismiss our history well that happened like you know 50 years ago that's to me

00:33:15.660 that's the opposite extreme that's like so downplaying the fact yeah that we do have a

00:33:20.120 history of this now i'm not standing up for those people who say that because i don't like that either

00:33:23.860 but in the cases when that's when those kind of things are said i feel like they're usually provoked

00:33:31.260 by comments of saying well you guys got to pay reparations right you guys got to pay like this 0.89

00:33:38.060 extreme you you've got to pay money for shit that happened right right exactly so right no i totally 1.00

00:33:44.080 agree with you so it's like these two extreme arguments of that of stupidity right to be 1.00

00:33:51.380 completely honest absolutely and the rest of us are caught in the crossfire right which is why 0.99

00:33:55.120 what we're saying here guys about the internet right it gives the fucking it gives everybody a voice 0.75

00:34:01.080 yeah absolutely not everybody deserves that voice and i think the answer is is have a firm position

00:34:06.700 be proud of your position but be reasonable like don't don't don't refuse to hear any of the claims of

00:34:13.260 the other side that's to me that's the problem is that we're so caught in the crossfire between

00:34:17.320 extremes that that when somebody says hey listen you're right not everything's racist but we do

00:34:21.840 need to recognize that there are some there are some historical racial undertones and and just have

00:34:26.840 a reasonable conversation the problem is we can't because the the extremes are so loud dude it's

00:34:31.200 because everybody's a liar yeah everybody's lying everybody's lying everybody's lying about the

00:34:36.340 issues okay like dude if like i'm talking about racism like 0.98

00:34:42.920 generations that are still alive today that are 60 plus years old they grew up using the term nigger

00:34:52.360 as if it was the term dude right you know what i'm saying like it was a common term right and 0.98

00:34:58.440 if you don't think that every single fucking white person every single one has family members in 1.00

00:35:05.480 their family that use the term nigger right they're a fucking liar right that's the truth 1.00

00:35:09.640 okay it's way fucking it's way more than what fucking white people want want to fucking say it is 1.00

00:35:16.360 absolutely but you know what it's also the truth is if you if you're fucking black and you your family 1.00

00:35:22.320 doesn't sit there and talk about the fucking white man and you act like that shit don't happen 1.00

00:35:25.820 you're fucking liar too everybody has their issues that's right no question absolutely so 1.00

00:35:31.480 and until those conversations at home are fucking not tolerated right you know what i'm saying like 1.00

00:35:39.660 where you hear your crazy uncle fucking saying that you say hey don't fucking say that right that's not 0.99

00:35:43.940 okay you know what i'm saying absolutely or whatever and that goes for both sides until the fucking 1.00

00:35:49.120 conversation is handled on the home front in the family gonna fucking change yep 100 because that shit is 1.00

00:35:56.060 taught you know what i'm saying like your kids hear your kids hear your crazy uncle hear that shit 1.00

00:36:01.560 and then they're like what's that mean and that's where it fucking starts yeah and until those 1.00

00:36:05.420 conversations are controlled at home and you and i'm talking to all of you stop tolerating that kind 1.00

00:36:11.360 of shit it ain't gonna change because here's what's happening right now you have motherfuckers who 1.00

00:36:18.180 tolerate that shit at home and then come out in public and act like they don't tolerate right and then 1.00

00:36:23.040 they're like well i don't know where this comes from like everybody's a liar they're all fucking 1.00

00:36:26.640 lying and there are some excuses but almost to a person if some kid is saying it it's probably 1.00

00:36:33.680 because they heard it at home it's probably because they heard it from their dad no shit mom yeah yeah 0.98

00:36:37.120 100 so okay so in order to have these great relationships where we can disagree but not 0.99

00:36:41.900 despise each other you gotta be secure in your own beliefs and you gotta you gotta learn to attack

00:36:45.620 the problem not the person and don't take it personal but i'm curious and i think there's an

00:36:49.800 element of sales in this so i'm excited to hear what you say you have to say but let me ask you

00:36:55.340 andy if you are going to influence somebody if you are going to persuade them to your point

00:37:00.760 how do you go about doing it instead of just yelling at people

00:37:05.280 i think that

00:37:12.360 i can only speak for me obviously um

00:37:19.660 for me

00:37:22.280 i when i was younger and when i say younger i mean like under the age of 30

00:37:28.200 um

00:37:29.620 i used to look at conversations

00:37:33.240 as something to be won

00:37:37.040 okay uh like to dominate the conversation you know what i mean

00:37:41.780 i'm right and here's why and here's this this this this this

00:37:45.620 um 0.99

00:37:47.320 and until i completely destroyed the other person or we got in a fucking fight 0.99

00:37:51.880 you know what i mean 0.99

00:37:53.000 uh

00:37:54.080 that's not productive

00:37:56.880 what that does

00:37:59.260 is even when you win

00:38:00.800 the other person ends up hating you

00:38:02.900 okay so uh

00:38:05.120 when you're in business which a lot of you guys are that's why you listen to this

00:38:09.100 that's not a productive way to do business

00:38:11.700 is to have a argument where the person walks away

00:38:15.080 hating you

00:38:16.140 right

00:38:16.420 um so i realized that and i realized that it probably would affect my money

00:38:21.600 um

00:38:22.560 and that's what made me start to like evaluate how i was

00:38:26.820 conversing

00:38:27.920 uh

00:38:29.540 i changed

00:38:32.200 i started to realize that

00:38:34.520 uh and and coincidentally when i started to realize that i started to make a lot more money

00:38:38.320 um

00:38:39.040 and

00:38:41.160 a lot of people

00:38:42.660 when you

00:38:44.380 you first of all you got to know when it's appropriate

00:38:46.680 right like it's not appropriate

00:38:48.780 unless you're a political

00:38:50.600 uh unless you're making your living

00:38:53.400 in politics

00:38:55.060 it is not

00:38:56.260 or religion

00:38:57.540 or whatever it is

00:38:58.560 these controversial subjects

00:39:00.580 it's not appropriate for you to go blast 0.99

00:39:03.620 this shit out everywhere 1.00

00:39:05.540 on your social 1.00

00:39:06.880 and here's why

00:39:07.700 because 50 percent of the people are going to disagree with you

00:39:10.620 a lot

00:39:11.160 okay

00:39:11.800 and because of the nature of our culture right now

00:39:14.380 when people tend to disagree

00:39:16.020 they tend to not like you either

00:39:17.300 so they're not tolerant of that

00:39:18.900 so what's happening to you

00:39:20.460 and what you may not realize 1.00

00:39:21.880 by you posting all this shit 1.00

00:39:23.380 saying all this shit 1.00

00:39:24.300 being loud about all this shit 1.00

00:39:26.020 is that 1.00

00:39:26.460 it's costing you a lot of fucking money 0.99

00:39:28.340 that you don't realize 0.99

00:39:29.140 a lot of 1.00

00:39:29.740 like what if you're posting shit on your social 1.00

00:39:31.760 that your boss three levels up 1.00

00:39:33.840 doesn't fucking agree with 0.99

00:39:35.180 and completely despises you 0.99

00:39:37.160 right 1.00

00:39:37.380 that's going to fuck you 1.00

00:39:38.660 okay 1.00

00:39:39.240 and you could say that's right or wrong

00:39:40.760 and you can argue about it

00:39:41.820 and you can say this or that

00:39:42.860 but it is what it is

00:39:44.280 he might not ever tell you

00:39:45.880 they might not ever say anything

00:39:47.640 it might not

00:39:48.580 but

00:39:49.100 but you're probably not going to progress very well in that company

00:39:51.980 all right

00:39:52.920 so

00:39:53.300 learning how to be tolerant of other people's

00:39:57.380 views

00:39:59.080 first off you have to learn

00:40:00.480 when it's appropriate to have the discussion

00:40:01.920 second of all I think that

00:40:03.520 the

00:40:04.240 changing your mindset

00:40:06.260 from I'm trying to win this conversation

00:40:08.740 which dude

00:40:10.000 I'm not the only one that used to be like that

00:40:12.200 I mean if you go online

00:40:13.100 that's pretty much the culture

00:40:14.360 everybody's trying to win the conversation

00:40:16.500 right

00:40:16.860 versus

00:40:18.380 trying to win the person

00:40:20.720 you know what I'm saying

00:40:22.060 I think a lot of people spend too much time

00:40:26.560 trying to win the conversation

00:40:28.560 when really

00:40:29.200 you

00:40:30.460 you could win over the person

00:40:32.440 and if you win over the person

00:40:34.000 it'll make you more money

00:40:34.880 it's going to be

00:40:35.760 it's going to make you

00:40:36.420 your relationship better

00:40:37.480 it's going to make your friendship stronger

00:40:38.940 it's going to make your network bigger

00:40:40.280 and I think that

00:40:41.880 is something that

00:40:43.560 people lose sight of

00:40:45.140 so

00:40:45.400 I think you're

00:40:46.500 I think the illustration that you use

00:40:48.500 for the Ford and Chevy

00:40:49.960 is a perfect example

00:40:51.080 between

00:40:51.440 of the difference between

00:40:53.400 winning an argument

00:40:55.880 and winning a person

00:40:56.800 you know where you

00:40:57.600 you talk about like

00:40:58.580 yeah there's a certain tact

00:40:59.660 right

00:41:00.000 yeah

00:41:00.180 like

00:41:00.600 like

00:41:00.940 like

00:41:01.680 like

00:41:02.840 and for people that don't know

00:41:04.620 what he's talking about

00:41:05.280 I'm talking about like

00:41:06.160 I use this example

00:41:07.600 in sales training all the time

00:41:08.960 because this is how sales people

00:41:11.280 typically are in the beginning

00:41:13.080 they try to win

00:41:14.220 like I'm trying to get you to buy this

00:41:16.280 I'm trying to win

00:41:17.280 I'm going to beat your arguments

00:41:18.460 that's right

00:41:18.880 and get

00:41:19.180 and yeah

00:41:19.800 when reality

00:41:20.840 the first step

00:41:22.160 to actually having a productive

00:41:24.560 sales call

00:41:26.020 or

00:41:26.760 a productive

00:41:28.420 conversation

00:41:29.600 where you're going to win someone over

00:41:30.800 is to side with them

00:41:32.900 okay

00:41:33.540 so the example that you're talking about

00:41:35.620 is

00:41:36.300 the guy

00:41:37.620 who's driven a Chevy truck

00:41:39.500 his whole entire life

00:41:40.540 okay

00:41:41.160 and

00:41:42.160 his

00:41:44.020 last Chevy truck

00:41:45.480 has broke down seven times

00:41:46.900 he's fed up with it

00:41:48.380 he still

00:41:49.620 likes Chevy

00:41:50.920 he's still loyal to Chevy

00:41:52.120 but he's at a point

00:41:52.900 where he wants to look at a Ford

00:41:54.740 all right

00:41:55.560 so the guy drives his Chevy truck

00:41:57.460 up on the Ford dealership

00:41:59.040 he gets out

00:42:00.020 of the

00:42:00.360 of the Chevy truck

00:42:01.340 the Ford salesman comes over

00:42:03.200 and looks at him

00:42:04.360 and says

00:42:04.720 dude 1.00

00:42:06.040 why are you driving a fucking Chevy 1.00

00:42:07.600 you need to be driving a Ford 1.00

00:42:09.500 what did that salesman just do

00:42:11.220 he said 1.00

00:42:11.740 you're a fucking idiot 1.00

00:42:12.580 he insulted him 1.00

00:42:13.380 right

00:42:13.600 right

00:42:13.960 and

00:42:14.240 because that person has made a conscious decision

00:42:17.080 to feel that way

00:42:18.920 about Chevy

00:42:19.760 for a long time

00:42:21.100 and even though he's upset with Chevy right now

00:42:23.800 you just ruin the only opportunity

00:42:25.980 to actually have a productive interaction

00:42:29.280 that would probably end with a sale

00:42:31.060 at this time

00:42:31.980 instead

00:42:33.100 what would happen if

00:42:37.320 the same scenario happened

00:42:39.280 the Chevy driver drove his truck up on the lot

00:42:41.300 he's in the mood to at least look at a Ford

00:42:43.780 and the Ford guy walks up and says

00:42:46.280 hey man

00:42:47.500 that's a beautiful truck you got

00:42:48.620 that's a beautiful truck

00:42:50.240 you know what

00:42:50.960 I drove Chevy for a long time

00:42:53.060 I really liked him a lot

00:42:54.160 and then you have a conversation

00:42:56.000 right

00:42:56.280 you know

00:42:56.640 blah blah blah blah blah blah

00:42:57.640 hey

00:42:58.200 what brings you in today

00:42:59.200 now how

00:43:00.420 now how's it go

00:43:01.580 you see what I'm saying

00:43:03.000 very well

00:43:03.200 very different

00:43:03.980 because you honored the person

00:43:05.800 you honored their choices

00:43:07.300 you honored the person's police

00:43:07.620 that's right

00:43:08.040 yes

00:43:08.340 doesn't mean you agreed

00:43:09.640 no you respect them

00:43:10.620 it meant that you honored

00:43:10.840 you honored and respected

00:43:11.960 it's a beautiful

00:43:12.780 I mean there's so many connections

00:43:14.200 between sales

00:43:14.900 and personal influence

00:43:16.860 right

00:43:17.120 and making an impact

00:43:18.720 on people's lives

00:43:19.380 it's good stuff

00:43:20.080 but dude think about that though

00:43:21.300 like think about somebody

00:43:22.820 who you're arguing with

00:43:23.880 and like

00:43:24.400 somebody who's got the complete

00:43:26.340 other side of the argument

00:43:28.300 that you do

00:43:30.340 they believe in the opposite of what

00:43:32.180 how different would the conversation go

00:43:35.080 if you said hey

00:43:35.880 instead of saying dude 1.00

00:43:37.400 you're a fucking idiot 1.00

00:43:38.180 instead of saying 1.00

00:43:39.280 you know

00:43:40.280 instead of saying

00:43:41.500 you know what 1.00

00:43:42.380 fuck Trump 1.00

00:43:43.660 he's a piece of shit 1.00

00:43:44.860 what if you said 1.00

00:43:46.140 hey you know what

00:43:47.440 there's some things about Trump

00:43:49.140 I really like

00:43:49.760 you know

00:43:50.660 he seems like a funny guy

00:43:51.760 he's got a good sense of humor

00:43:52.860 you know

00:43:53.920 you know what I'm saying

00:43:55.080 absolutely

00:43:55.600 you gotta find the common ground

00:43:56.780 dude I had to learn that

00:43:58.040 because after a year of Obama

00:43:59.300 I said to myself

00:44:00.620 I'm either gonna be

00:44:01.560 the most offensive

00:44:02.520 irritating person

00:44:03.800 about this president 0.97

00:44:04.620 or I've gotta just decide

00:44:06.060 listen

00:44:06.500 I don't have anything

00:44:07.400 personally against the guy

00:44:08.320 I just disagree with some of his policies

00:44:10.100 so I had to learn

00:44:11.520 how to say

00:44:12.160 me too

00:44:12.820 listen I don't hate him

00:44:13.880 he's a good dude

00:44:14.800 I actually started to look forward to his jokes

00:44:17.280 yeah

00:44:17.900 because the guy made funny jokes

00:44:18.880 yeah and he

00:44:19.380 Obama was actually pretty good too

00:44:21.500 on a lot of the videos that he made

00:44:23.060 dude I'm gonna tell you this

00:44:24.040 he was pretty good at pointing

00:44:24.380 poking fun at himself

00:44:25.880 oh dude

00:44:26.420 look

00:44:27.000 you know

00:44:27.260 he's got a good sense of humor

00:44:28.700 he seems like a cool ass dude 0.63

00:44:30.580 uh 0.99

00:44:31.480 I would love to have a fucking beer with him 0.99

00:44:33.860 for real 0.99

00:44:34.460 and uh

00:44:36.060 and I don't agree with any of his politics

00:44:38.480 you know what I'm saying

00:44:39.340 I believe almost nothing

00:44:40.560 yeah

00:44:40.740 but like

00:44:41.140 but the dude

00:44:41.800 the dude seemed

00:44:42.680 and I'll tell you this too

00:44:43.940 I don't know

00:44:45.100 outside

00:44:46.420 of

00:44:47.820 of

00:44:48.240 of

00:44:48.880 maybe a few

00:44:49.900 maybe five other people

00:44:51.840 that ever lived

00:44:52.500 he's probably one of the greatest speakers

00:44:54.320 in history

00:44:54.640 he's a very good orator

00:44:55.700 for sure

00:44:56.320 um

00:44:56.900 yeah

00:44:57.280 for sure

00:44:57.980 I dude

00:44:58.620 I mean dude

00:44:59.220 his words just come through

00:45:00.660 yeah

00:45:01.200 and his voice

00:45:01.860 it's like 1.00

00:45:02.300 fucking butter dude 1.00

00:45:03.660 his Q&A 0.99

00:45:04.640 not so much

00:45:05.240 but his

00:45:05.860 but his speeches

00:45:06.600 are really good

00:45:07.980 yeah

00:45:08.160 but uh

00:45:08.860 okay guys

00:45:09.800 so how you connect

00:45:10.860 how you

00:45:11.420 how you

00:45:12.140 disagree without

00:45:14.080 despising one another

00:45:15.100 once again

00:45:16.340 get secure in your beliefs

00:45:17.580 uh

00:45:18.300 learn to attack the problem

00:45:19.260 not the person

00:45:19.880 don't take it personally

00:45:20.740 um

00:45:21.920 how would you

00:45:23.480 I guess you would phrase it

00:45:24.660 don't try to win an argument

00:45:25.620 try to win over the person

00:45:26.820 yeah

00:45:27.120 right

00:45:27.580 stop trying to look at conversation

00:45:29.460 as something to win

00:45:30.300 and start looking at it

00:45:31.260 as something to learn from

00:45:32.200 yeah

00:45:32.640 you know what I mean

00:45:33.800 yeah 1.00

00:45:34.080 because ignorant people 1.00

00:45:35.520 try to win conversations 0.99

00:45:36.720 smart people try to see

00:45:38.060 what they can learn

00:45:38.680 absolutely

00:45:39.480 you know

00:45:40.000 for sure

00:45:40.560 for sure

00:45:41.680 um

00:45:42.800 I actually have a pretty cool story

00:45:44.760 can we close on a story

00:45:46.260 yeah

00:45:46.560 so this buddy of mine

00:45:48.940 uh

00:45:49.620 from around here

00:45:50.380 his name is Don

00:45:51.060 this is not the Don

00:45:51.900 that you're thinking of

00:45:52.640 who was my client

00:45:53.260 this is another Don

00:45:54.200 um

00:45:55.120 he told me this story

00:45:56.260 is he one of your male 0.76

00:45:56.920 prostitution clients

00:45:57.800 no

00:45:58.680 that's another Don

00:45:59.900 there you go

00:46:02.660 see now he's finally

00:46:03.940 getting the jokes

00:46:04.560 right

00:46:05.160 yeah

00:46:05.560 so um

00:46:06.240 so no

00:46:06.660 he told me this story

00:46:07.560 about how

00:46:08.040 you know

00:46:08.440 when he was growing up

00:46:09.540 in high school

00:46:10.760 he got into

00:46:12.060 some really bad stuff

00:46:13.180 and he was in a bad crowd

00:46:14.480 now not the kind of bad crowd

00:46:15.800 that you know

00:46:16.640 we might say

00:46:17.740 was he like bad stuff

00:46:18.660 like put the lotion

00:46:19.660 in the basket stuff

00:46:20.440 I don't know what that means

00:46:21.700 but

00:46:21.960 but he wasn't like

00:46:23.060 come on

00:46:24.260 that's Silence of the Lambs

00:46:25.540 oh

00:46:25.920 yeah

00:46:26.340 it's been a while

00:46:26.900 since I've seen that

00:46:27.620 oh my god

00:46:28.200 come on

00:46:28.500 hello Clarice

00:46:29.280 everybody knows

00:46:30.580 put the lotion

00:46:31.280 in the basket

00:46:31.860 like that's like 1.00

00:46:33.260 the ultimate crazy shit 1.00

00:46:34.480 oh that is 1.00

00:46:35.020 is that like

00:46:35.500 with cannibalism

00:46:36.240 and stuff

00:46:36.600 yeah

00:46:36.760 don't you remember

00:46:37.260 the part

00:46:37.640 where like

00:46:38.100 the girl

00:46:38.420 was in the hole

00:46:38.840 it's been a long time

00:46:39.520 oh come on

00:46:40.140 everybody make fun of Vaughn

00:46:42.260 for not knowing

00:46:43.280 Silence of the Lambs

00:46:44.040 but

00:46:44.340 in any case

00:46:45.160 so he was telling

00:46:45.860 this story

00:46:46.360 they put the lotion

00:46:47.260 in the basket

00:46:47.860 dude

00:46:49.320 I gotta explain it

00:46:50.700 alright

00:46:51.460 you explain it

00:46:52.020 and then I'll tell

00:46:52.900 something about

00:46:53.320 another movie

00:46:54.140 and then I'll get back

00:46:54.760 that's my story

00:46:56.020 the kidnapped girl

00:46:57.040 have you seen that movie

00:46:57.980 yeah

00:46:58.420 it's been a long time

00:46:59.040 the girl is in the hole 0.99

00:47:00.080 in the well

00:47:01.120 and he's trying to

00:47:02.600 get her to put lotion on

00:47:03.700 so her skin will be soft

00:47:05.160 and he can cut it off

00:47:06.380 and wear it as a suit

00:47:07.600 oh yuck

00:47:08.300 remember

00:47:08.640 yeah yeah yeah

00:47:09.200 I do remember that

00:47:09.920 I know that a lot of his

00:47:11.200 statements are like

00:47:11.920 you know

00:47:12.260 double entendre

00:47:13.600 plays on words

00:47:14.420 like so nice of you

00:47:15.380 to come over for dinner

00:47:16.220 and stuff like that

00:47:17.080 oh you're talking about

00:47:18.180 Hannibal Lecter

00:47:18.700 yeah

00:47:19.140 oh yeah yeah

00:47:19.860 yeah yeah

00:47:20.240 this is Buffalo Bill

00:47:22.400 okay

00:47:22.980 oh I gotcha

00:47:23.820 well okay

00:47:24.480 so before I go back

00:47:25.240 this is the guy

00:47:25.660 Hannibal tried to catch

00:47:26.640 you gotta watch it again

00:47:27.460 I gotcha

00:47:27.880 I will

00:47:28.240 but before I go back

00:47:29.140 to my story

00:47:30.400 which is a good one

00:47:31.280 by the way

00:47:31.720 but before I go back

00:47:32.900 to it

00:47:33.240 I was just thinking

00:47:34.800 I've got the perfect line

00:47:36.740 for Sal

00:47:37.540 if anything ever

00:47:38.740 happens to you

00:47:39.580 and he has to

00:47:40.920 kind of take up

00:47:41.460 the mantle

00:47:41.900 yeah

00:47:42.280 I think he should

00:47:44.180 stand in front of

00:47:44.800 everybody and be like

00:47:45.580 you have bled

00:47:46.920 with Andy

00:47:47.580 now bleed with me

00:47:49.300 oh dude

00:47:49.920 Braveheart

00:47:50.420 that would be awesome

00:47:51.160 yeah yeah yeah

00:47:51.860 okay well on that note

00:47:52.740 back to my story

00:47:53.440 that's uh

00:47:53.860 that's uh

00:47:54.640 Robert the Bruce

00:47:55.240 yeah Robert the Bruce

00:47:55.980 which there apparently

00:47:56.620 there's a new movie out

00:47:57.520 Robert the Bruce

00:47:58.140 no way

00:47:58.660 yeah

00:47:58.920 is it with him

00:47:59.500 it's on Netflix

00:48:00.660 is it the same guy

00:48:01.580 no it's Chris Pine

00:48:02.900 is playing Robert the Bruce

00:48:04.640 Chris Pine

00:48:05.900 he's like a younger actor

00:48:06.980 he was like the new

00:48:08.100 Captain Kirk

00:48:08.700 and some of the new

00:48:09.300 I don't know none of those guys

00:48:09.900 yeah yeah

00:48:10.360 well I don't

00:48:10.880 it's amazing to me

00:48:11.920 I don't know half

00:48:12.640 the people's names

00:48:13.380 the only actors I know

00:48:14.620 is ones I'd probably

00:48:15.560 go on a date with

00:48:16.300 yeah

00:48:16.600 like Barack 1.00

00:48:17.540 fucking Thor 1.00

00:48:19.260 whatever that 0.99

00:48:19.820 Chris Hemsworth

00:48:22.260 yeah

00:48:22.720 I'm not gay

00:48:23.880 but I'm just saying

00:48:24.440 I'd go on a Monday

00:48:25.740 with those guys

00:48:26.280 absolutely

00:48:26.560 okay so back to my story

00:48:28.860 so Don

00:48:29.500 my friend Don

00:48:30.320 he grew up in St. Louis

00:48:31.220 he was into some bad stuff

00:48:32.480 in high school

00:48:33.000 really bad stuff

00:48:33.700 not like boys will be boys

00:48:34.900 type stuff

00:48:35.400 but he was like

00:48:36.320 taking some pretty

00:48:37.240 hardcore drugs

00:48:38.060 he was

00:48:38.400 what's hardcore to you

00:48:40.260 like oregano

00:48:40.740 no I think he was like

00:48:42.100 meth and stuff

00:48:43.100 oh really

00:48:43.420 he was doing

00:48:43.880 yeah like he was

00:48:44.740 and then he was

00:48:46.380 I think he was stealing stuff

00:48:47.420 anyway

00:48:47.780 his mom

00:48:49.960 listen this is a good story

00:48:51.120 this is a good story

00:48:52.020 so his mom actually

00:48:53.040 forces him to go to this

00:48:54.180 this youth camp

00:48:55.480 with

00:48:55.980 with

00:48:56.980 and the youth speaker

00:48:58.620 was actually his

00:48:59.720 his youth pastor

00:49:00.940 at the camp

00:49:01.760 so he had kind of

00:49:02.820 a previous relationship

00:49:03.500 how old is this guy

00:49:04.000 oh he's my age

00:49:04.980 but he went to a youth camp

00:49:06.460 at your age

00:49:06.960 no no no

00:49:07.540 he went to a youth camp

00:49:08.920 when he was in high school 1.00

00:49:09.980 so he was into this shit 1.00

00:49:10.860 when he was in high school 1.00

00:49:11.500 yeah that's what I'm saying

00:49:12.640 like he was off

00:49:13.400 on a wrong foot

00:49:14.460 right

00:49:14.720 okay

00:49:15.500 so he goes to this youth camp

00:49:17.580 and the speaker

00:49:18.820 is his youth pastor

00:49:19.860 okay

00:49:20.320 and at one point

00:49:22.340 throughout the week

00:49:23.380 he and a couple of his buddies

00:49:25.820 go into the bathroom

00:49:27.320 and I think they were going to smoke

00:49:28.320 or something

00:49:28.700 or do whatever

00:49:29.420 and they just start ripping

00:49:31.340 on the youth pastor

00:49:33.160 okay

00:49:33.820 which is his youth pastor

00:49:35.000 like they're saying

00:49:35.600 all sorts of really

00:49:36.800 really mean stuff 0.98

00:49:37.720 I bet he's in the shitter 0.98

00:49:38.500 toilet flushes 0.99

00:49:40.540 he comes out

00:49:41.760 Don's like 0.96

00:49:42.480 oh crap 0.97

00:49:43.180 and here's the thing 0.99

00:49:44.700 he was like bracing for it 1.00

00:49:46.600 because he knew he was a jerk 1.00

00:49:47.780 and he was kind of bracing for 1.00

00:49:49.080 getting a tongue lashing

00:49:50.100 and what he was surprised about

00:49:51.760 when Keith came out

00:49:53.540 is that Keith had this

00:49:56.060 really pained expression

00:49:57.360 on his face

00:49:57.780 almost like he was going to cry

00:49:59.320 and Don told me

00:50:01.320 he was like

00:50:01.660 I looked at him

00:50:02.280 and he was like

00:50:02.680 dang

00:50:03.040 and all of a sudden

00:50:03.900 he was like

00:50:04.300 man I think I hurt his feelings

00:50:05.740 so he started apologizing to Keith

00:50:07.860 he said

00:50:08.660 hey man

00:50:09.200 I'm really sorry

00:50:10.220 I didn't mean to hurt your feelings

00:50:11.920 you weren't that bad of a speaker

00:50:13.380 and I took some of the things you say

00:50:15.700 so Keith says

00:50:17.420 in this just really like

00:50:18.800 somber serious way

00:50:21.300 he's like

00:50:21.960 Don

00:50:23.120 my feelings are not hurt

00:50:25.340 he said

00:50:25.980 you are into some bad stuff

00:50:28.440 and I'm concerned about you man

00:50:29.840 I love you

00:50:30.440 and he just said

00:50:32.500 and I just

00:50:32.920 you know

00:50:33.400 I just hope you get your life turned around

00:50:35.020 and he said

00:50:36.660 you know

00:50:37.140 when you want to turn your life around

00:50:40.340 I'll be there

00:50:40.800 I'll be there to help you

00:50:41.660 and so

00:50:42.480 Don said

00:50:43.280 that made a huge 0.99

00:50:43.920 that's a fucking wake up call man 0.99

00:50:45.000 yeah 0.99

00:50:45.260 so Don said

00:50:46.220 it made a huge impact

00:50:47.260 on him at the moment

00:50:48.360 but he still

00:50:49.140 but he still

00:50:50.600 proceeded down that path

00:50:52.640 so about five years later

00:50:54.340 his life has just like 0.99

00:50:56.500 gone to shit 0.99

00:50:57.120 fallen apart 1.00

00:50:57.460 he's bought a gun

00:50:58.960 he put

00:51:00.420 he had it

00:51:01.040 in his mouth

00:51:01.840 he said 0.81

00:51:02.680 he was about to pull the trigger

00:51:03.740 he closed his eyes

00:51:04.540 and he pictured

00:51:05.240 Keith's face

00:51:06.120 and he said

00:51:07.060 the thing that struck me

00:51:08.100 is that Keith's face

00:51:09.240 wasn't angry

00:51:09.980 it wasn't like

00:51:11.220 gonna ball him out

00:51:13.040 for disagreeing with him

00:51:14.240 or you know

00:51:15.380 ripping on him

00:51:16.020 he said

00:51:16.640 I just saw his face

00:51:17.940 in my mind

00:51:18.540 and he said

00:51:19.400 I thought

00:51:19.860 that dude's concerned about me

00:51:21.700 he loves me

00:51:22.540 he cares about me

00:51:23.280 so he said

00:51:24.120 I uncocked the pistol

00:51:25.420 I put it down

00:51:26.480 I tried to find his number

00:51:28.280 within five minutes

00:51:29.100 I found his number

00:51:29.840 I called him

00:51:30.580 and fast forward

00:51:32.280 he's a family man

00:51:33.500 he's an upstanding guy

00:51:34.680 oh and by the way

00:51:35.400 he runs a youth camp

00:51:36.520 that's what he does

00:51:37.100 for a living

00:51:38.060 and the reason

00:51:38.920 that I say that

00:51:39.620 is because I think

00:51:40.420 I think our tendency

00:51:41.760 when we disagree with people

00:51:42.820 or when they offend us

00:51:43.660 or they say

00:51:44.040 is we just want to yell at them

00:51:46.000 and we want to

00:51:46.700 we want to put them in their place

00:51:47.800 and like you said

00:51:48.440 we just want to win the argument

00:51:49.480 and I've always

00:51:50.520 that story has always

00:51:52.420 really struck me

00:51:53.080 because

00:51:53.620 Keith didn't think about

00:51:55.800 winning the argument

00:51:56.500 he just thought about

00:51:57.820 communicating

00:51:58.400 hey I care about you

00:51:59.700 I love you

00:52:00.180 I'm here to support you

00:52:01.200 I'm not going to argue with you

00:52:02.960 over what I believe

00:52:03.840 or what you believe

00:52:04.580 I'm just here if you need me

00:52:06.040 and it had a radical transformation

00:52:07.520 on them

00:52:08.020 and I think at the end of the day

00:52:09.520 for those of us

00:52:11.300 who really do

00:52:12.540 not care

00:52:13.800 how different

00:52:14.820 somebody else lives

00:52:15.980 or believes

00:52:16.680 or whatever they do

00:52:18.040 it doesn't mean

00:52:18.600 that we agree or disagree

00:52:19.580 but at the end of the day

00:52:20.920 the people who are able

00:52:21.720 to get along with one another

00:52:22.800 are people who just

00:52:24.180 fundamentally have

00:52:25.120 a concern

00:52:26.300 and a decent

00:52:27.540 a decent desire

00:52:30.380 to support someone

00:52:31.820 whether we agree with them

00:52:32.880 or not

00:52:33.220 and if more of us

00:52:34.320 would do that

00:52:34.820 I think we could go a long way

00:52:36.240 into transforming this culture

00:52:38.000 yeah

00:52:38.260 and I think

00:52:39.120 I think another point

00:52:43.100 in that story

00:52:45.500 in that story

00:52:46.320 that's a great story

00:52:47.060 by the way

00:52:47.520 I think

00:52:48.400 another point

00:52:50.180 in that story

00:52:50.820 and this is one of the points

00:52:52.200 of the book

00:52:52.660 in The Four Agreements

00:52:53.540 which is a great book

00:52:54.600 if you haven't read

00:52:55.160 I've heard that's a good book

00:52:56.140 yeah it's really good

00:52:56.740 but

00:52:58.240 it's never

00:52:59.500 to take things personal

00:53:00.980 and this goes back

00:53:05.140 to the point

00:53:05.520 we talked about

00:53:06.120 being secure

00:53:06.820 in your beliefs

00:53:07.440 right

00:53:07.940 when you're secure

00:53:09.280 in your beliefs

00:53:09.860 and you've done

00:53:10.460 the homework

00:53:10.920 you've done

00:53:11.340 the research

00:53:11.900 and you truly

00:53:12.800 believe

00:53:14.080 what you believe

00:53:15.560 it helps

00:53:17.540 when things like

00:53:19.060 that happen

00:53:19.740 to not take them

00:53:20.820 personal

00:53:21.200 and not get defensive

00:53:22.240 and not get angry

00:53:23.340 and understand

00:53:24.160 that that

00:53:25.420 what

00:53:25.680 even though

00:53:26.600 that those guys

00:53:27.900 were talking about

00:53:28.920 the Keith guy

00:53:30.540 and they were saying

00:53:31.440 those negative

00:53:31.880 even though

00:53:32.420 you might be

00:53:33.540 the person

00:53:34.080 in the stall

00:53:34.660 that the other people

00:53:36.080 are talking about

00:53:36.900 that conversation

00:53:38.300 really has little

00:53:39.040 to do with you

00:53:39.580 right

00:53:39.780 it's more about them

00:53:40.720 that's right

00:53:41.100 it's more about

00:53:41.560 their problem

00:53:42.060 and when you

00:53:42.480 when you truly

00:53:43.280 start to understand

00:53:44.260 that I think

00:53:44.820 that's where

00:53:45.180 you start to rise

00:53:45.920 above

00:53:46.440 you know

00:53:48.000 the bottom

00:53:48.500 one or two percent

00:53:49.560 of crossfire

00:53:51.440 that we're seeing

00:53:52.920 in society

00:53:53.480 and I like

00:53:54.460 this conversation

00:53:55.120 we've had

00:53:55.720 because

00:53:56.120 I did feel

00:53:57.220 kind of bad

00:53:57.800 about last week's

00:53:58.680 podcast

00:53:59.040 even though

00:53:59.580 it was

00:53:59.800 extremely popular

00:54:01.080 people went crazy

00:54:03.080 they loved it

00:54:03.720 and I get that

00:54:04.500 like

00:54:04.960 because dude

00:54:05.400 I'm expressing

00:54:07.000 the frustrations

00:54:09.140 that a lot of people

00:54:09.980 have

00:54:10.400 and I've got that

00:54:11.180 from every

00:54:11.820 culture

00:54:12.640 every gender

00:54:13.600 all 17 of them 0.99

00:54:15.380 or whatever the fuck 0.99

00:54:16.160 is out there 0.99

00:54:16.660 like

00:54:17.260 27

00:54:20.060 yeah

00:54:20.660 whatever man

00:54:21.340 but the point

00:54:22.940 is

00:54:23.180 is like

00:54:23.600 I didn't

00:54:26.320 I don't ever

00:54:27.260 feel good

00:54:27.820 about

00:54:28.160 pointing out

00:54:30.360 a problem

00:54:30.740 without offering

00:54:31.320 a solution

00:54:31.800 yep

00:54:32.100 you know

00:54:32.460 what I mean

00:54:32.840 and you shouldn't

00:54:33.840 either by the way

00:54:34.560 not you Vaughn

00:54:36.840 but no I got you

00:54:37.500 the listeners

00:54:37.940 you know

00:54:39.640 when there's a problem

00:54:40.960 you're not doing

00:54:41.600 the world

00:54:42.060 they're not doing

00:54:42.960 the world of service

00:54:43.780 by just complaining

00:54:44.560 about it

00:54:44.980 and I felt

00:54:45.440 I felt bad

00:54:46.760 about that

00:54:47.200 after last week's

00:54:47.980 podcast

00:54:48.280 so I feel good

00:54:49.780 about what we're

00:54:50.300 talking about here

00:54:50.980 because I do

00:54:51.740 believe

00:54:52.220 that the way

00:54:54.440 to really change

00:54:55.560 all those things

00:54:56.720 we talked about

00:54:57.360 last Sunday

00:54:58.040 is to really

00:54:59.520 get control

00:55:00.400 of our own

00:55:01.560 beliefs

00:55:02.020 to become secure

00:55:03.680 in our own beliefs

00:55:04.560 and to rise above

00:55:06.180 the personal

00:55:08.860 attacks

00:55:09.420 and start to 1.00

00:55:11.360 squash that shit 1.00

00:55:12.160 be better than it 1.00

00:55:13.020 you know what I mean

00:55:13.720 absolutely

00:55:14.320 at the end of the day

00:55:16.440 we are in the United States

00:55:18.200 and I know we have

00:55:19.360 international listeners

00:55:20.360 all over the world

00:55:21.060 which I appreciate you guys

00:55:22.280 I don't know a lot

00:55:23.260 about your country

00:55:24.060 because I live 1.00

00:55:24.840 fucking here 0.99

00:55:25.420 right 0.99

00:55:25.820 okay

00:55:26.140 and so

00:55:27.240 I'm sure your country

00:55:29.160 might have similar issues

00:55:30.380 but at the end of the day

00:55:32.020 we're in control

00:55:34.100 of how we behave

00:55:35.020 we're in control

00:55:36.380 of how we treat others

00:55:37.420 we're in control

00:55:38.340 of the things we say

00:55:39.580 and the things we do

00:55:40.640 and

00:55:41.440 how we interpret

00:55:43.560 the things that we think

00:55:45.640 alright

00:55:46.420 because not everything

00:55:47.300 you think

00:55:47.760 is going to be right

00:55:48.540 okay

00:55:49.380 so becoming aware enough

00:55:51.520 to examine these things

00:55:53.000 and to get

00:55:54.260 aligned

00:55:56.500 with what it is

00:55:58.080 you truly believe

00:55:59.040 not what you're thinking

00:56:00.140 at the moment

00:56:00.820 gives you the ability

00:56:02.900 to not take things

00:56:04.100 so personal

00:56:04.760 to not hate

00:56:06.000 President Trump

00:56:07.220 or not hate Obama

00:56:08.540 or not hate white people 0.91

00:56:10.220 or black people

00:56:11.040 or you know 0.89

00:56:12.640 gay people

00:56:13.360 or this or that 0.71

00:56:14.000 and the truth is

00:56:15.160 we need that

00:56:16.740 we need less 0.99

00:56:18.380 fucking hate 0.99

00:56:19.200 but I'm going to tell you this 0.99

00:56:20.500 posting a positive 0.99

00:56:22.740 fucking meme 1.00

00:56:23.920 saying 1.00

00:56:24.780 oh love

00:56:25.820 that's not how you fix it

00:56:27.220 you fix it

00:56:28.200 like I said

00:56:28.800 you know

00:56:29.940 like I said

00:56:30.820 by not tolerating 1.00

00:56:32.580 the bullshit 1.00

00:56:33.040 in your family 1.00

00:56:33.680 right

00:56:34.060 okay

00:56:34.440 and holding

00:56:35.240 and holding

00:56:35.260 your family's

00:56:35.900 conversation

00:56:36.460 to a higher

00:56:37.040 standard

00:56:37.460 not allowing

00:56:38.580 things

00:56:39.220 in private

00:56:40.180 to happen

00:56:41.620 that you would

00:56:43.060 you would not allow

00:56:44.800 in public to happen

00:56:45.740 you see what I'm saying

00:56:46.940 absolutely

00:56:47.460 and it's about

00:56:47.940 dude

00:56:48.220 it's about all of you

00:56:49.320 who are listening right now 1.00

00:56:50.720 to quit fucking lying 1.00

00:56:52.240 and quit 1.00

00:56:53.460 letting things slide

00:56:55.500 over here

00:56:55.920 because it's your aunt

00:56:56.840 Mildred

00:56:57.360 and she's old 1.00

00:56:58.680 you know what dude

00:56:59.880 you either stand 1.00

00:57:00.540 for fucking shit 1.00

00:57:01.220 or you don't 1.00

00:57:02.300 and that's that

00:57:02.980 and if you don't

00:57:03.740 stand for it

00:57:04.200 in your family

00:57:04.700 dude I'm going to tell you

00:57:05.520 right now

00:57:05.840 you don't stand for it

00:57:06.500 yeah

00:57:08.220 I don't tolerate 1.00

00:57:09.860 that shit at home 1.00

00:57:11.200 I don't have people 1.00

00:57:12.860 in my family 1.00

00:57:13.460 that say that shit 1.00

00:57:14.160 to me 1.00

00:57:14.400 you know why

00:57:14.960 because the last time 1.00

00:57:16.320 they said that shit 1.00

00:57:16.980 to me 1.00

00:57:17.240 I fucking gave them 1.00

00:57:18.000 an earful 1.00

00:57:18.420 you know what I mean

00:57:19.920 you're either about it 1.00

00:57:20.720 or you're fucking 0.99

00:57:21.240 not about it 0.99

00:57:21.920 and that's that

00:57:22.500 it's right or wrong

00:57:23.760 it's real simple

00:57:24.480 but the way things change

00:57:25.980 and the way that we get around

00:57:28.080 all the problems

00:57:28.680 that we talked about

00:57:29.320 last week

00:57:29.880 is by starting

00:57:31.260 with ourselves

00:57:32.300 and starting with ourselves

00:57:33.980 not about tolerating

00:57:35.800 but learning how to communicate

00:57:37.480 in a way

00:57:38.200 that doesn't cause

00:57:39.280 more division

00:57:40.280 right

00:57:41.220 and that takes 0.99

00:57:42.520 fucking 0.99

00:57:43.120 a lot of things 0.99

00:57:44.000 it takes intelligence

00:57:44.800 it takes

00:57:45.580 commitment

00:57:47.980 it takes

00:57:48.980 tolerance

00:57:49.780 it takes patience

00:57:50.980 and honestly

00:57:52.080 humility

00:57:53.000 humility

00:57:53.340 humility

00:57:53.740 it takes you studying

00:57:56.240 okay

00:57:57.140 it takes empathy

00:57:58.200 and all of those things

00:58:00.000 together

00:58:00.540 putting those things

00:58:04.320 together

00:58:04.780 in a situation

00:58:05.780 to create a better

00:58:06.760 outcome

00:58:07.220 to me

00:58:07.700 is honorable

00:58:08.380 absolutely

00:58:09.420 you know what I mean

00:58:10.900 and that's what

00:58:11.880 that's what life's about

00:58:12.840 dude

00:58:13.120 it's about holding

00:58:14.000 yourself

00:58:14.420 to a standard

00:58:15.780 that you would like

00:58:17.080 to see

00:58:17.740 society

00:58:18.720 have

00:58:19.720 because

00:58:20.820 you never know

00:58:22.180 who's watching

00:58:23.720 or who's learning

00:58:24.640 or who's emulating

00:58:25.740 what it is

00:58:26.900 that you stand for

00:58:27.760 so be that

00:58:29.480 at work

00:58:30.720 be that

00:58:31.320 on social media

00:58:32.220 be that

00:58:32.800 at home

00:58:33.460 and things will start

00:58:35.900 to change around you

00:58:36.780 and your immediate

00:58:38.420 world

00:58:39.180 will change

00:58:40.060 quickly

00:58:40.560 not

00:58:42.380 30 years

00:58:43.360 from now

00:58:43.880 not

00:58:44.540 because I think

00:58:45.100 that's a big problem

00:58:46.040 for people right

00:58:46.700 like a big problem

00:58:47.660 for people

00:58:47.980 are like

00:58:48.220 dude

00:58:48.400 it doesn't matter

00:58:49.060 it doesn't matter

00:58:50.420 what I do

00:58:50.960 you know what I mean

00:58:52.360 yeah it's so not true

00:58:53.720 right

00:58:54.080 it's not true

00:58:55.200 but people think that

00:58:56.140 they think

00:58:56.760 you know what

00:58:57.360 I'm just gonna do this

00:58:58.900 because it doesn't 0.97

00:58:59.600 fucking matter 1.00

00:59:00.100 the world's shit 1.00

00:59:00.840 the world's this 1.00

00:59:01.540 the world's that

00:59:02.060 I give up

00:59:02.640 and that's not the truth

00:59:04.040 the truth is

00:59:04.920 is that

00:59:05.280 what you do

00:59:06.260 matters a lot

00:59:07.300 you just might not

00:59:08.480 see it right away

00:59:09.360 it's a fact

00:59:10.760 of

00:59:11.760 human existence

00:59:13.800 that one person

00:59:15.980 can royally

00:59:18.440 screw up a country

00:59:19.560 but also one person

00:59:21.360 can start the movement

00:59:22.700 that transforms it

00:59:23.860 for the better

00:59:24.340 it just

00:59:25.100 it sounds cheesy

00:59:25.980 and it sounds like

00:59:26.780 the motivational memes

00:59:27.780 we're talking about

00:59:28.500 but it really is true

00:59:29.380 like that is how

00:59:30.920 effective

00:59:32.300 one human life can be

00:59:33.680 well and the truth is

00:59:34.620 Vaughn

00:59:34.860 is not everybody listening

00:59:35.800 has the tools

00:59:36.760 to change the world

00:59:37.680 not everybody listening

00:59:39.160 can speak into a microphone

00:59:41.160 and move

00:59:42.080 millions of people

00:59:43.380 okay

00:59:44.060 not everybody

00:59:46.600 can think

00:59:47.420 in a way

00:59:48.480 that would change

00:59:49.080 the world

00:59:49.600 but everybody

00:59:52.840 listening right now

00:59:53.740 has the ability

00:59:54.560 to change

00:59:55.920 what's going on

00:59:56.940 in their home

00:59:57.460 to change

00:59:58.080 what's going on

00:59:58.700 in their friend circle

00:59:59.540 to be a leader

01:00:00.740 in that group

01:00:01.500 and that will

01:00:02.460 drastically improve

01:00:04.220 the quality of your life

01:00:05.320 a hell of a lot more

01:00:06.860 than posting 1.00

01:00:07.680 some bullshit 1.00

01:00:08.640 regurgitated meme 1.00

01:00:09.860 that we see

01:00:10.800 on every wannabe 1.00

01:00:11.620 fucking Oprah's 1.00

01:00:12.700 fucking Instagram account 1.00

01:00:14.640 absolutely 1.00

01:00:15.320 you know what I'm saying

01:00:16.000 yep

01:00:16.300 and that's real change

01:00:17.720 absolutely

01:00:18.400 so

01:00:19.100 good stuff man

01:00:20.900 yeah dude

01:00:21.360 I like these Sunday sermons

01:00:22.780 yeah

01:00:23.080 it's a little bit different

01:00:23.980 yeah

01:00:24.360 this was a good sequel

01:00:26.920 to last week

01:00:27.620 well I don't see any reason

01:00:29.300 why we can't keep

01:00:29.880 building off of it

01:00:30.580 just solve the world's

01:00:31.600 problems right

01:00:32.040 hey yeah

01:00:32.680 so guys

01:00:33.820 that's the show

01:00:35.740 for today

01:00:36.280 I appreciate you guys

01:00:37.300 listening

01:00:37.680 Vaughn appreciate you guys

01:00:38.940 Tyler appreciate you guys

01:00:41.060 even though he's in New York 0.91

01:00:42.100 doing some weird shit 0.99

01:00:44.360 probably 0.98

01:00:44.760 for his birthday

01:00:46.080 but

01:00:46.760 we love you guys

01:00:48.220 thank you guys

01:00:49.020 for all the support

01:00:49.860 pay the fee

01:00:52.100 you know what the fee is

01:00:53.080 the fee is

01:00:54.060 tell a friend

01:00:54.920 if you enjoyed the podcast

01:00:56.000 alright guys

01:00:57.420 love you all 0.99

01:00:58.560 black white gay 0.98

01:00:59.680 purple 1.00

01:01:00.320 fucking 27 genders 1.00

01:01:01.960 we're all homies 1.00

01:01:03.100 alright

01:01:03.380 talk to you guys later

01:01:04.640 we're all homies

01:01:05.680 we'll be there

01:01:07.120 we'll be there

01:01:07.980 we'll be there 1.00

01:01:09.100 black gay 1.00

01:01:09.740 earlier 0.99

01:01:10.340 we'll be there

01:01:11.600 we'll be there

01:01:12.920 we'll be there

01:01:13.520 we'll be there

01:01:13.920 we'll be there

01:01:14.840 we'll be there

01:01:15.260 we'll be there

REAL AF with Andy Frisella - November 18, 2018

SUNDAY SERMON： How to Disagree Without Despising Each Other, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO274

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