REAL AF with Andy Frisella - September 06, 2018


The #1 Most Effective Motivator That People Never Use, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO262


Episode Stats


Length

17 minutes

Words per minute

162.41795

Word count

2,763

Sentence count

209

Harmful content

Misogyny

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

3

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode of Thursday Thunder, I talk about a situation that happened to me when I was in high school and how I dealt with it. I also talk about how I learned to be a better person and a better human being.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.400 I can stack them hundreds to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon.
00:00:04.880 Without me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me gotta lose.
00:00:12.500 What is up guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host and I am the motherfucking CEO.
00:00:19.640 And this is Thursday Thunder. But before we get into Thursday Thunder, I want to welcome the new listeners.
00:00:26.840 And I want to say thank you guys so much for subscribing to the podcast and recommending it to your friends.
00:00:34.620 It's been very, very easy to tell that that's happening. And I just appreciate all of you guys doing that for us.
00:00:42.200 Remember, this is a movement. This isn't just a podcast.
00:00:46.080 And I don't run ads for the first fucking 15 minutes like everybody else does and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:00:52.840 And I'm really trying to help people understand what it takes to succeed and to be fulfilled and to develop their best possible life.
00:01:02.900 I just want to say thank you guys for doing what I ask and, you know, recommending friends and telling friends about it and getting people turned on to the movement.
00:01:11.360 So I'll leave it at that.
00:01:13.120 I have a story for you guys, and it's going to lead into what I want to talk about today.
00:01:18.940 When I was in high school, I was a pretty good athlete.
00:01:25.620 I was, I would say, middle of the road popular.
00:01:28.840 I wasn't popular. I wasn't unpopular. I was just an average dude.
00:01:31.600 And, um, when I started to like, like girls and all that, I, I, uh, I found this girl that I, that, that quite honestly, dude, I thought was the end all be all for me at the time.
00:01:47.300 I was 17 years old. It was the first girl I ever really, uh, had a crush on or really liked.
00:01:53.120 Um, and dude, I was, you know, head over heels in love with this girl.
00:01:57.360 I did everything I could to, you know, impress her.
00:02:00.960 You know, I sent her flowers.
00:02:02.120 I was, which by the way was, you know, my game was real weak at that time.
00:02:05.420 Uh, but I, I like, dude, I called her every day.
00:02:10.240 I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.
00:02:11.760 I just know that I liked this girl and she was very popular.
00:02:15.660 And, uh, this went on for like, I don't know, like a year, dude.
00:02:19.500 I had a huge, huge, huge crush on her and we were quote unquote, I got, you know, put in the best friend zone.
00:02:26.040 Um, and one time we went out and she fucking looks at me and she says, uh, Andy, you know, I would really want to date you if nobody else ever knew about it.
00:02:41.220 And talk about like breaking someone's heart and like also pissing them off at the same time.
00:02:47.860 Um, I was so upset, not just like heartbroken, but like pissed that, you know, I made, uh, you know, a decision right then and there that I wasn't going to be a fucking bitch in my life. 0.90
00:03:04.920 And I was going to become something one day and I was going to show her and all these things that we think, right.
00:03:10.520 Uh, except I actually did it.
00:03:12.780 Um, and now I would tell you like, you know, like if I saw her on the street, I wouldn't even fucking recognize her, nor would I, you know, be interested in her at all.
00:03:21.700 If I was a single man, the point of what I'm trying to say here is, you know, I was devastated.
00:03:26.920 Um, I was, I was so upset.
00:03:29.500 I was, you know, so disappointed.
00:03:31.400 I was, I felt so disrespected and rejected.
00:03:35.260 And, you know, we've all been in some sort of similar situation like that.
00:03:40.940 Um, and what I want to talk to you guys about is going to have a lot to do with that.
00:03:46.980 And I know that comes out of the blue and I know that's a story that like probably all of you have at some point.
00:03:52.460 Um, but I want to talk about what people say and what they, you know, put on you when they say, oh, you should set attainable goals.
00:04:03.960 Because in my mind, in that situation, and if you asked everybody else, she's, they would have said, oh, she's way out of his league.
00:04:10.720 And you know what she fucking was. 1.00
00:04:12.280 But the truth of the matter is, is I've never been one to set realistic goals.
00:04:17.280 I've always wanted the best.
00:04:18.560 I've always wanted to be the best and I've always continued to put the work behind that.
00:04:23.080 Um, but I want you guys to realize that when people tell you to set realistic and obtainable goals, I truly believe those people without maybe realizing it are insulting you because they don't think that your fragile little ego can take the heartache of disappointment.
00:04:42.800 And the truth is guys, the reason I say, I set huge goals isn't just because I think I can accomplish them.
00:04:51.700 It's because I know that if I don't accomplish them, those unrealized expectations hurt the disappointment that you feel when you set massive goals and don't hit them is a great thing.
00:05:07.640 All right.
00:05:08.860 You guys have to understand that pain teaches when you feel pain.
00:05:17.100 It should not be something that you wallow in and that you cry about.
00:05:21.740 Maybe you cry about it for a fucking day.
00:05:23.580 Okay.
00:05:24.080 That's acceptable.
00:05:24.940 But the point is, is that when you have something that doesn't go the way that you want, that is a trigger for you to go out and create a situation where it is impossible for you to not get what you want.
00:05:42.380 And that's the difference between people who succeed and people who don't people who succeed, understand that pain teaches them to level the fuck up.
00:05:56.140 They don't whine and cry and bitch about how shit's unfair, dude.
00:06:01.120 I could just as easily be a 39 year old man crying about the girl that broke my heart and fucking when I was 17, like most people do.
00:06:13.160 But what did I do?
00:06:14.880 And you could say this is petty.
00:06:16.460 You could say it's whatever, but I operate from the dark side, motherfuckers.
00:06:20.540 And that means when people fucking do wrong to me, I make sure that I not only do what it is that they don't believe in me for, but that I rub it in their fucking face later on in life.
00:06:33.660 Obviously with some class, because that's the more fun way to do it.
00:06:37.320 But the truth of the matter is, is I was not a motivated high school student.
00:06:44.760 I was not a, uh, super achiever in school.
00:06:48.780 I wasn't voted most likely to succeed.
00:06:51.760 Okay.
00:06:53.520 But that fucking experience for me caused enough pain to kick me in the ass and say, you know what?
00:07:01.860 I'm going to fucking shove it down that bitch's fucking throat. 1.00
00:07:04.920 And you know what?
00:07:05.640 That's what I fucking did.
00:07:07.220 And that, that one instance probably carried me for the first three or four years of our business.
00:07:13.000 Three or four years.
00:07:14.040 I was able to think back and be like, dude, I'm going to fucking show her.
00:07:18.420 I'm going to this.
00:07:19.080 I'm going to that.
00:07:19.500 And you could say, Oh, well, that's insecurity.
00:07:21.320 If you were secure, you know what?
00:07:22.880 I'm glad I was insecure.
00:07:24.540 I'm glad I was in that situation because I take the pain and I put it into productive action.
00:07:32.520 I take every negative thing that someone says to me about me or whatever it is they believe
00:07:42.360 or don't believe about me.
00:07:43.960 And I use it to go out and do shit.
00:07:47.000 And I true, I spoke about this in LA this past weekend.
00:07:50.440 If you were there, you heard some of this.
00:07:53.480 All right.
00:07:54.100 You have to understand that everything that you are or aren't is a reflection of your ability
00:08:03.620 to leverage the things that are put in front of you.
00:08:07.800 Okay.
00:08:08.540 If you're somebody who is able to leverage all the good things and all the bad things and
00:08:16.900 all the middle things towards your goals, you're going to be very successful because
00:08:22.820 you're able to take what we can't control what the world gives us.
00:08:26.500 We can't control what other people think about us.
00:08:29.360 We can't control if your high school sweetheart likes you back. 1.00
00:08:33.620 We can't control any of that shit.
00:08:35.960 But what we can't control is how we react and how we leverage those situations.
00:08:42.360 And so a lot of people these days like to talk about how you should just, you know, they
00:08:49.560 talk about like kindness and they talk about all this other fluffy shit, you know, positive
00:08:55.360 vibes and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:08:58.000 No, motherfucker.
00:09:00.200 That's not reality.
00:09:01.640 That's reality once you've made a bunch of money, but the truth of it is, is that you
00:09:07.440 have to have motivation coming from all aspects because becoming successful is hard.
00:09:14.680 And if you're not utilizing all the pain and all the other shit that you have, you're going
00:09:22.320 to be left behind because the people who do use those resources are going to beat you.
00:09:28.220 That's what you have to understand.
00:09:29.960 You're going to read these fucking fluffy memes on the internet that say, do it for the people
00:09:35.100 that believe in you.
00:09:35.980 Don't worry about those that don't motherfucker. 1.00
00:09:38.080 I would listen to every motherfucker that tells you, you can't, I would write it down.
00:09:43.420 I would write the time down.
00:09:44.800 I would write the date down so that you can go back and read the shit and say, fuck that
00:09:50.700 guy.
00:09:51.520 Because you know what?
00:09:52.580 Fuck that guy might be your only way that particular day to get up and get out of bed and do what
00:09:58.440 needs to be done.
00:09:59.220 And that's the difference.
00:10:01.420 A lot of people will dwell on negativity.
00:10:03.980 They will take the pain of disappointment, whether it be with a, with a, you know, romantic
00:10:09.640 relationship or whether it be in business, they set a huge goal.
00:10:14.100 You went out and fell on your fucking face.
00:10:16.500 Now you're embarrassed.
00:10:17.760 And guess what?
00:10:18.520 That's painful.
00:10:19.560 A lot of people will see that as the end.
00:10:22.480 Most people will see that as an end.
00:10:24.300 What will they tell themselves?
00:10:25.620 They'll tell themselves this.
00:10:26.540 Well, I guess entrepreneurship wasn't for me.
00:10:30.760 Guess what?
00:10:32.520 Entrepreneurship sure as fuck isn't for you.
00:10:34.460 If you're going to fucking say that.
00:10:37.740 Entrepreneurship is for people with grit.
00:10:39.700 It's for people who know how to persevere.
00:10:41.960 It's for people that know how to take these huge embarrassing moments and use them to fuel their drive for years to come.
00:10:52.760 That's what successful people do.
00:10:55.620 Now, a lot of people don't talk about it because it's not popular.
00:10:59.400 They keep all the dark shit on the inside and they say, oh, I'm just about kindness or I'm just about pleasure or I'm just about positive fucking vibes.
00:11:08.100 But the reality is, you get them to fucking open up and tell the truth, they're going to tell you.
00:11:13.260 They drive a lot of their productivity from the people who say they can't.
00:11:18.480 They drive a lot of their productivity from the situations that have caused them the most massive pain in the past.
00:11:29.340 Their disappointments.
00:11:30.680 Their failed relationships.
00:11:32.340 Their failed attempts at business.
00:11:33.880 That does not mean you're a failure unless you quit, which is what most people do.
00:11:40.100 If you pull every successful person that you look up to online and they told the truth, I promise you, they are 50% positive vibes and positivity and all that other shit, but they got a 50% of the dark side too.
00:11:57.020 Don't be afraid of using pain to drive your success.
00:12:01.380 You don't even have to talk about it if you don't want because it's not popular.
00:12:05.260 I only talk about it because I'm trying to be authentic with you guys and let you know the way it really is.
00:12:10.300 Do you get mad when people tell you you can't?
00:12:13.440 Yes, you do.
00:12:14.280 And if you don't, you're never going to be shit.
00:12:16.300 That's the truth.
00:12:17.780 If you could genuinely tell me that it doesn't upset you when other people tell you that you fucking can't do what it is you're trying to do, you ain't got what it takes.
00:12:27.700 And that's a fact.
00:12:28.780 You will not make it.
00:12:29.680 I promise, okay?
00:12:31.540 And you will never hear me say you will not make it, I promise, on anything else.
00:12:37.600 The reason you won't make it is because you're not utilizing all the resources available to you.
00:12:41.860 And sometimes resources aren't money.
00:12:44.520 They aren't experienced.
00:12:45.960 In the beginning, we don't have all the shit everybody else has.
00:12:49.660 We don't have the connections.
00:12:51.540 We don't have the Rolodex or the fucking phone book.
00:12:55.420 We don't have money.
00:12:56.520 We don't have, you know, experience.
00:12:59.540 We don't have knowledge.
00:13:00.740 What do we have?
00:13:02.100 What are our resources that we have in the beginning?
00:13:04.660 We have a vision.
00:13:08.220 We have motivation.
00:13:09.880 We have inspiration to do something and get somewhere.
00:13:13.300 And then what do we have?
00:13:14.620 We have the negative vibes that other people give us.
00:13:18.460 We have the people who believe that you can't do it and are vocal about it.
00:13:23.780 Write that shit down, man.
00:13:25.620 Write that shit down.
00:13:26.860 And always use it.
00:13:28.100 Because I'm going to tell you, once you get to a level like where I'm at, everybody's going to tell you how great you are.
00:13:33.420 And everybody's going to tell you that you can make it.
00:13:35.580 And that's where a lot of people fucking fail.
00:13:37.300 Because once they get to a certain point, all the same motherfuckers that were saying you can't are saying how proud of you they are.
00:13:45.900 And you start believing it.
00:13:47.680 You start believing you're good.
00:13:49.620 You know what I like?
00:13:50.780 I like to remember back on all the shit that I failed at.
00:13:54.680 On all the people that didn't believe in me.
00:13:57.020 I like to think about the shit they said to me.
00:13:59.140 And I remember every single conversation that I've had with someone who was critical of my hopes and dreams and projects and my ability to succeed.
00:14:10.560 I remember all of them.
00:14:12.560 And I use them every single day to this day.
00:14:15.560 And that ability to take pain and allow it to drive you is one of the most valuable resources you will ever, ever have.
00:14:27.900 You have to understand the people you're competing against, they're using that.
00:14:36.080 There is no shame in using the dark side.
00:14:40.860 Okay?
00:14:41.420 Pain teaches.
00:14:42.920 Pain is there to serve you.
00:14:44.700 Pain is there to help you.
00:14:46.440 Pain is there to get you to where it is you want to go.
00:14:50.420 The problem is, is that most people don't use pain properly.
00:14:54.700 And that's why when the pain comes and the disbelief comes and the negativity comes and the people criticizing them comes, they roll up into a ball in the corner and they say, this isn't for me.
00:15:06.660 Well, if you're the type that's going to roll up on the ball in the corner because someone attacks you with words, now let's think about that.
00:15:15.020 With words, we're not talking about shooting you or stabbing you or trying to kill you.
00:15:20.360 We're talking about with words.
00:15:22.220 If you're the type that's going to roll up in a ball because someone says they don't believe in you, you do not have what it takes to play this game.
00:15:31.920 You have to use it all.
00:15:35.900 You've got to be able to produce productive actions from your negativity, from your pain, from your disappointment, from your anger, from your frustration.
00:15:45.920 The minute someone says something to you that is painful or frustrating or disappointing or anything negative should be your cue to jump into action, to make that call, to send that email, to read that 15 pages of that book, to have that meeting, to work on that design.
00:16:09.500 That's what successful people do.
00:16:14.780 Use your pain, let it teach you, let it show you the way, and let it be your fuel because there's going to be an endless amount of it on this journey.
00:16:24.020 I can guarantee you that.
00:16:39.500 Amen.
00:16:39.780 Amen.
00:16:40.600 Amen.
00:16:41.180 Amen.
00:16:41.320 Amen.
00:16:41.380 Amen.
00:16:43.020 Amen.
00:16:43.320 Amen.
00:16:43.560 Amen.
00:16:43.580 Amen.
00:16:44.580 Amen.
00:16:44.620 Amen.
00:16:45.600 Amen.
00:16:46.020 Amen.
00:16:46.600 Amen.