Episode 2116 Scott Adams: Did Epstein Blackmail Gates? Schiff Expulsion Odds, Bakhmut, More
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 5 minutes
Words per Minute
142.7296
Summary
On this episode of The Daily Show with Bill Maher, Alex Blumberg, Alex takes a look at why the House of Representatives should expel Rep. Adam Schiff for being the biggest liar in Congress, and Glenn Greenwald talks about the tragic death of his young family.
Transcript
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Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
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Good morning, everybody, and welcome to the Highlight of Civilization.
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It's your lucky day, because you're here, and so are all of us.
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And we're going to have the best time you've ever experienced.
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And all you need to take it up a level is a cup or a mug or a glass,
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a tank or jalous or stine, a canteen jug or flask,
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And join me now for the unparalleled pleasure of the dopamine hitter of the day,
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has got some legislation to ban DEI in universities.
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And two of our biggest states have banned it as dangerous in universities.
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Now, how would you like to be a DEI, you know, head of a DEI market,
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and know that two states thought it was so dangerous they had to make it illegal?
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Would you say to yourself, well, there's two stupid states.
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Or would you say to yourself, maybe I should look into why they did that?
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You can't even do it if you're in a university, at least in Florida.
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I feel that that would have an impact on my career decisions.
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Huh, do I want to keep working on this thing that two responsible states,
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two of our bigger ones, have decided is so dangerous,
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It can't even be an option, even if you want it.
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They should at least look into why people think that.
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Well, as you know, the House is trying to expel Adam Schiff
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Imagine being the biggest liar in your neighborhood, right?
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If you were the biggest liar in your entire neighborhood,
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I mean, you probably don't have that many liars in your neighborhood.
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How about the biggest liar in your whole zip code?
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You know, if you knew somebody was the biggest liar in your entire zip code,
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But Adam Schiff is the biggest liar in Congress.
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It's like a whole other level of worst liar in the world.
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Bigger than the biggest one in your entire zip code.
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And will they kick him out of Congress for lying?
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How in the world can you kick people out of Congress for lying?
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You know, was there any time in the 50s or something where we imagined things were awesome,
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Was there any time when Congress was anything but lying?
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I don't even know if you could get elected if you told the truth.
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So a group of professional liars believe they can expel one of their members for lying too well.
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but I don't see any possibility that that could happen with the Congress being what it is.
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But at least we get to talk about it, and that's better than nothing.
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Glenn Greenwald is back to work after his tragic family situation.
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His husband passed away, if you didn't hear about that,
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especially because of the young family situation.
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So somehow that struck me as more tragic than a lot of things in the news.
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There was just something about that that really got me.
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So, but anyway, Glenn Greenwald is back to his combative self.
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and there was a new survey that he was riffing off.
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But he points out how, if you look at American opinions
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there are three gigantic stories that Americans believe are true,
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or they have a belief about these three big stories, I'll mention them,
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the mainstream press just treats them like they don't exist.
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The three stories are the Russia collusion hoax,
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the story being it's the hoax, and we know that now.
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The Hunter laptop hoax, which we know is a hoax by the intel people.
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And the Hunter and Joe Biden's dealings overseas
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with whatever sketchy payments were happening there.
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The American public does believe by a big majority
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and that the government tried to tell you it wasn't,
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and that Hunter and Joe have some questions to answer
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So the majority of America cares about these three stories,
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The fact that we can just sort of act like maybe it doesn't matter,
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and then because our opinions are assigned by the media,
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nobody's assigning an opinion that you should care,
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Well, the House is coming up with this fentanyl bill.
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Now, fentanyl, of course, has always been illegal
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but the trouble was that the dealers kept tweaking the compounds in it
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to make it technically different than the illegal one that was specified.
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And so now Congress is trying to tighten that up
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so that any form of fentanyl, even if you've tweaked it,
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It doesn't matter if you tweaked a few compounds,
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All right, well, yes, it seems like if you're going to make it illegal,
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And there's a thing that I always criticize people for criticizing,
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Does this seem like a story of Congress doing the right thing?
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How many years have we known this problem existed?
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Probably four or five years we've known that the bad guys were changing the formula to make it legal?
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That's why China says, oh, there's nothing we can do.
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We keep making it illegal, but then they keep making a slightly different version.
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And we always knew that was fake, because of course they could do it.
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They just had to do what our Congress is doing and saying,
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you can't change a few compounds and call it a new thing,
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So, to me, this is an admission of massive incompetence of our Congress.
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The fact that it took years to plug the most obvious hole you could ever plug,
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Now, the thing I criticize when people say the things like I just said
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is everything you want to happen takes too long.
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There's nothing good that should not have happened sooner.
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So I mock people who say, well, why didn't you do it sooner?
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There was probably everybody involved knew that this hole needed to be plugged.
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I mean, to me, this is just a confession of massive, massive incompetence in Congress.
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I mean, it's hard even to hold in my mind the level of incompetence
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know that they had failed because of this tweaking of compound stuff,
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I don't even know how to describe that level of incompetence.
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It's beyond what my brain can even hold, and I can hold a lot of incompetence in there.
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Anyway, so there are now three prominent voices, at least, and maybe you can list some more,
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who want to use the military to attack the cartels in Mexico.
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So Dan Crenshaw has apparently been appointed to, so Speaker McCarthy put him in charge of a high-profile task force
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to figure out effective strategies against the cartels.
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Again, you could say what took you so long, but I think maybe that had to do with the nature of the House.
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Yes. So, now that we have the House, you know, a House that is going to be more aggressive about fentanyl,
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do you think Dan Crenshaw is the right person to be leading that high-profile task force?
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Because I know there's a lot of critics of him.
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Do you want somebody who doesn't have military, that specific kind of military experience?
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And I always prefer a military person recommending war.
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So, if somebody who's actually been in war says, you know, I hate war, don't do war, but you've got to do it this time,
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You know, because Congress doesn't have an infinite number of people to put on anything.
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He has the highest, I think he has the highest profile with also the right resume for the job.
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I think that's a good, that feels like a good move by McCarthy.
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So, now we know that Trump wants to attack the cartels militarily.
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Vivek Ramaswamy may be more prominent than the others in terms of how often he brings it up.
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My God, you can't attack a neighboring country.
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You know, what will the Mexican military think?
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And how can you deal with your neighboring countries like that?
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Well, the first thing I would like to suggest is nobody's saying attack the country.
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Nobody's saying attack the Mexican military or the government buildings.
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For 99.9% of all Mexicans, they wouldn't be aware there was a war on the cartels.
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You know, the cartel sites presumably would be attacked.
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Maybe there would be some kind of black ops assassination campaign that was going on.
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But most people wouldn't even know there was a war.
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You would just wake up, do what you always do, and go back to bed again.
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There wouldn't be any bombs in your neighborhood, right?
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They're going to go after well-identified cartel centers and laboratories and stuff.
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So everybody who says you can't go to war with Mexico, nobody's going to war with Mexico.
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The Mexicans are as interested in being us as opposed to fighting us.
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So I don't know what that would look like, but I'm glad everybody's talking about it now.
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So there's a new survey out about how many Americans believe in God.
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And it's a little murky because, you know, how you ask the question gives you a different answer.
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But according to, let's see, we did this survey by the University of Chicago, some research organization there,
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that not quite 50% of Americans say they have no doubt about the existence of God.
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And the other 50% are either not sure or presumably some of them are sure he doesn't exist.
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But do you think this is going to be a continuing trend?
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And I guess that, believe it or not, the pandemic actually accelerated the reduction in religious belief.
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But do you think this trend is going to be a good, not good, but let's say a long-term trend,
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Or at least maybe the strictest interpretations of religion.
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Do you, I remember when I was a kid, it seemed like Newt Gingrich and all the conservative Christians
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Because there were enough of them that, since they operated as a block often,
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it seemed like they had a lot of power, didn't they?
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But I guess the numbers for that went from like a quarter of the country down to the teens.
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So basically, they're half as big as they were.
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I'm not sure specifically evangelicals, but the people sort of in that camp,
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there are only half as many of them as when I was a kid, or when I was younger.
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Because I wouldn't say that the mainstream media is behind it.
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Because they don't say any anti-religion stuff.
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I mean, Bill Maher is the only one I can think of who is openly anti-religion.
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If you believe that Satan is active, what changed?
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But how did the smartphones make you less religious?
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Do you think they're getting less of it in school?
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Because I'm pretty sure all of my teachers in school were religious and you knew it.
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But if you had a teacher who was not religious,
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but maybe that's part of several variables that are changing.
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Well, it's not just that people are less likely to go to church,
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They're less likely to think there's an afterlife.
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So, aren't you interested in what's changing that?
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And that's such a big, big fundamental cultural change.
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It's hard to estimate whether that's helping or hurting.
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I mean, that is such a fundamental part of the country.
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And the breaking point is when ordinary people can profess
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Like, you know, if only 1% of the country were atheists,
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If only 1% were atheists and everybody else totally believed,
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because it wouldn't be safe to give your opinion.
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But we have sort of gradually crawled toward a place
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where you could run for office and say you don't believe in God.
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Do you think you could run for president in 2024?
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But I don't know that it would be a fatal error.
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Yeah, I think we've reached a point where people would say,
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and one of those things you can be is a non-believer.
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Now, of course, there would be some people who held that against them,
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But that's the same way it is for everything, right?
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If somebody's too religious, you might hold that against them too.
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But it seems like it's safe to be a non-believer now.
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I don't think you would lose your job for it, would you?
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Have you heard of anybody losing their job because they didn't believe in God?
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Anyway, so maybe it just got it safe to say you're not a believer,
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Trump and, I guess, Truth Social are suing the Washington Poop.
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Oh, by the way, the Washington Post are collecting their Pulitzer Prizes
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but when I learned how the Pulitzer Prize is awarded,
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You would always be a Pulitzer Prize-winning cartoonist.
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And then I get interviewed by a guy whose wife...
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But their wife was on the committee, the Pulitzer committee.
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Now, there are a number of little Pulitzer groups
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And do you know what it takes to be on the Pulitzer judging committee?
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So it's literally nothing but a little group of people
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sitting around a room or Zooming with each other
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from that little group of randomly selected people,
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Is there anything that means less to you than that?
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where whenever it's the audience is the ones who votes,
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It just means a little group of people picked you.
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and has been on a years-long crusade, they say,
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which the Washington Post was suggesting they did,
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but they're going to sue them for $3.78 billion.
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It would put the Washington Post on a business, wouldn't it?
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So this is actually an existential threat, isn't it?
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True Social is trying to take out the Washington Post.
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You know, as we're in the run-up to the 2024 election,
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But I don't think it's been a news organization
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I think it's just a fake news laundering organization
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After a 30-year successful business partnership
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in which they'd carried my comic to great success,
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Because they're not in the business of being credible or...
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Well, they're in the business of looking credible.
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So I believe that I was just one more chess piece
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There were some people who didn't hear the whole story