Episode 3022 CWSA 11⧸18⧸25
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
147.48064
Summary
In this episode of Coffee with Scott Adams, I talk about how to survive when all of your plans fail and you have to do something in public, and how to sell it as normal so you can survive it easy.
Transcript
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i have no idea what to expect today we got every kind of technical problem you can imagine
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the x platform is down i hear locals is down but i'm not sure because here it looks like it's
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working looks like rumble is working and locals is working and youtube is youtube working hard to
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know so everybody's streaming here and we're going to make something of this day which is uh
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not getting off with a best start oh you know what i have to do i've got to print my notes
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all right i'm going to print those notes i like it or not today is mostly a rolling disaster
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but you're going to like it you might even love it i'm back so what we're going to do today
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is some reframes because the news is all boring and terrible yeah fighting snakes what
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i'm going to scoot over there and grab my notes because i do have a few
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and then i'll be right back don't do anything while i'm gone
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all right all right so i think we got enough people here
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we'll we'll make sure something happens something's gonna happen i don't know what
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good morning everybody and welcome to the highlight of human civilization it's called coffee with scott
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adams and you've never had a better time but if you'd like to take a chance on elevating this
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experience to levels that nobody can even understand with their tiny shiny human brains
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well all you need for that is a copper mug or a glass of tankard chelsea stein a kinteen jugger flask
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a vessel of any kind fill it with your favorite liquid i like coffee and join me now for the
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unparalleled pleasure the dope media of the day the thing that makes everything better call it the
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all right if you're just signing on this morning there's some kind of massive
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cloud problem that's taking down x for most of the morning i thought it was taking down locals
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i tried to do the pre-show but it glitched me out i couldn't get on but when i just logged on it looks
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like looks like locals might be working all right so here's what i thought i would do
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something like a hundred thousand people are going to sign on here expecting to see my regular show
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do you think they're going to see it i i had no ability to prepare because i use x as my
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you know 80 of all my preparation goes through x directly or indirectly so i decided that what i
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do is we'll do some reframes but i'm also going to demonstrate something just so you can see it
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live and what i'm going to demonstrate is uh what to do when all of your plans have been destroyed and
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you have to do something in public so i'm now entering the scariest thing that an adult can do
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it's very much like uh you're going to a test and you you forgot to study or you're going in for the
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last day of school and you forgot your assignment so you get to watch while you see if i can navigate
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this situation will it be easy no it will not be easy can i do it well i don't know we'll see
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but i think it i think it's fair to say that most people would have a nightmare showing up unprepared
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for a test that's what i'm doing right now i'm going to show you how to survive it easy really
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so here's the first trick for surviving when everything goes wrong your audience doesn't
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know what you were planning to do so they can't tell it went wrong they just know maybe it's not what
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you did yesterday so if you can pull it off try to sell it as normal i was thinking today uh how
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talented the uh conservative podcast world is you know i was trying to think how many people
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who have podcasts who have conservative audiences how many of them could just sign on and do an hour of
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content without preparation and the answer is about a lot of them but a lot of them could uh benny johnson
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do that probably could megan kelly do that definitely uh could uh all the people who are the main hosts
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of fox news do that yeah greg jesse kennedy they could all do that if they had to um victor davis
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hansen sure so it does seem like some people are just born to do this maybe i'm in that category
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because i feel comfortable doing it all right is anybody yet horrified because you're thinking to
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yourself i'd hate to be him right now because he's going to do a whole show with no preparation
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oh i got a stories i got i got plans yeah it's not completely without preparation so i've told you
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many times i took the dale carnegie course when i was in my 20s and it teaches you how to navigate this
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exact situation and by exact i mean you had to do some kind of public presentation podcast or anything
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else and things went wrong you're actually trained to do that so i'm doing what i'm trained to do so
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if it looks easy to me that's not natural skill training i'm just used to it i also don't have
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any normal sense of embarrassment so i'm not worried about things going wrong at all because i don't have
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any sense of embarrassment and most of you would understand i mean if if everything went terribly wrong
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you'd all understand right it wouldn't be a big deal and uh we'll see here's a here's another trick
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for public presentations you may have heard me say this one before but it applies really well right now
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that in order to be interesting in a public sense you have to create the well you don't have to but it's
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really handy if you can create the illusion that you're in danger or somebody's in danger so danger
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is what gets people's attention because it's a busy world you know we got we have stuff to look at
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can't look at everything all at the same time so what i'm doing is creating a sense of danger
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uh a small danger the danger is that i would embarrass myself or humiliate myself by not being prepared
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nope no problem yet um so yesterday interesting thing happened you probably want to know about it
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so carrie lake was nice enough to put a very nice message on x uh wishing me well you know with my
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health challenges and then elon musk and then she said something like we love you to me uh meaning the
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audience loves me and uh then one of the people in the comments was elon musk and he said we do
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what so basically i woke up to elon musk telling me he loves me now i love him too so the feeling is
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quite is quite mutual but uh what you're wondering is does it feel better when the most uh successful
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and richest man in the world tells you he loves you versus the average person and the answer is oh yeah
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it's way better yeah it's just so much better way way better
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it's funny because i'm joking but not really i mean if you had a choice of being uh if somebody
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telling you they love you uh wouldn't it be cool if they were an awesome person yeah it'd be a little
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bit better i mean it would be great no matter who it was but it's a little bit better anyway so i enjoyed
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that today thank you elon all right um let's see what else is going on you know some of you are waking
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up and saying scott i have ocd and you're ruining my routine uh i come here to find out the news
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well luckily for you i have prepared the what i call it the evergreen news
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news so this is the news that just never changes uh in science news eating makes you gain weight
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psychedelic mushrooms make you less depressed according to the scientists who came up with
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the idea of getting themselves psychedelic mushrooms and getting paid for it smartest scientists ever
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um also in the news ai is still not uh able to do advanced general intelligence still can't do it
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advanced general intelligence and we don't know how to make it do it we don't know how to get there
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uh in other news some new group of rich people just pulled together a trillion dollars
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to invest in ai that is still not able to do advanced general intelligence and we don't know how to
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make it do that okay maybe tomorrow uh meanwhile americans kids american kids are getting fatter and
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stupider no one has a plan for health care that would work the epstein files probably won't ever be
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released hamas doesn't want to disarm fentanyl still coming in from china the federal budget's still
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out of control trump thinks there's too much crime in cities and trump said something or did something
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authoritarian yeah you did not see that coming and uh other surprises in the news adam schiff is
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accused of lying there's a new photo of a uap but we couldn't get a clear photo of it
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so that catches you up on all the news did i leave anything out no this episode is brought to
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well here's an update on the simulation one of the one of the ways i know we live in a simulation
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or at least i do i don't know about you is that i clearly have themes that would make no sense if
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it were random one of the themes is i have continuous water leaks in my life now those of
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you who've been following me for a long time are laughing because you know that it's true
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and i even predict them i tell you well i got this one fixed there's gonna be another water leak
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problem it always is so yesterday for example uh i was in my lazy boy chair and i reclined the lazy boy
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uh which was a bad move because i got my catheter bag stuck in the lazy boy
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and it yanked a full bag of urine off the off the hose and started just draining it now the good
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news is caught it before it got to the chair because the chair had cushions on it because don't ask
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because i've got a leg that's oozing uh so it already had waterproofing on it from my leg in general
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but uh so we cleaned that up got that all cleaned up um and this is one of those situations where you
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like being the the disabled guy because i just got to sit there and say you know you might have missed
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some over there i think you missed some over there so it turns out if you're not the one cleaning it up
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not that big a deal not that big a deal then later that night i fell asleep also in the
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lazy boy and gary the cat i woke up maybe 2 30 in the morning and gary the cat had found a nice little
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nest in my arm and oh it was so cute gary was just soft and fuzzy and he loved me and he was just
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right in that crook of the arm and then i thought you know what would be good is i feel a little parched
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so i'd like to take a sip of water so i reached over carefully so as not to disturb gary took my water
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and then very carefully tried to unscrew the cap but apparently the unscrewing of the cap
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made some kind of a noise couldn't have been that loud maybe something like this
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and that was just enough to send gary into a full cattywampus blizzard of arms and legs and tail
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and i'm like oh god no it's a hurricane of cat parts and uh when it settled down uh
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uh i'm gonna settle down i had a bottle of water all over me and no cat so i don't know how you are
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doing how are you doing anyway um you probably want an update uh i'm gonna read some uh reframes when we
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get to it so today will be special change your lives anyway some of you want my cancer updates
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um here's some words that you might want to know if you're talking to somebody else
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about what's what at least in cancer treatment in my case so dr pat sun xiang is uh he's got these and
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well he's got something called the uh bio shield technology which uh i already have in me there
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will be more of it coming uh maybe i'll get some nk and t cells those would be helping my immunity
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but then separately there's there's this thing called pluvicto that i have one of the upcoming
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what will be a total of six um six doses over six weeks so that's just in the process at the moment
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i'm weirdly pain free and i don't want to trust that yet because you know the whole goal is to get
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pain free so at the moment no pain i have no pain relievers well actually i do but not very strong
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and uh it never made a difference before so i'm pretty sure that's not making a big difference
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anyway uh but i do have some uh terrible wounds on my legs
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for some cancery reason i don't know but those are pretty bad but those those are being treated no
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problem all right so let's go to my book refrain your brain i decided what i would do is i'd read
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some reframes out of the section on social life does anybody here need a better social life you
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want me to reframe it for you so i've got a whole uh a whole bunch of reframes that will help your
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social life all right let's do these um some of these you've heard but they're all they're all worth
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hearing more than once because it'll just really pack it in there so the usual frame is people will tell
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you to be yourself you ever hear that do you ever have somebody in your life who'll say well scott
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the secret the secret to success is you should be yourself to which i say um shouldn't i be a
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better version of myself if i'm just myself i'm not am i not going to be a little bit suboptimal
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are you telling me that doing whatever i feel like is somehow going to be giving me a good life
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i don't think it works like that at all no you should not try to be yourself you should always
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strive to be some improved better version of whatever you think is the best you can be
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and you should be shooting for that gives you something to do much better uh much better system to
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continuously be chasing the better version of you and you never get there that's the key you never get
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there all right uh youtube is live streaming yes it is all right here's another one these are social
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life reframes from my book reframe your brain changing lives everywhere um this one's similar but you can
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pick which one you like the usual frame would be you should learn to love yourself as you are
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should you do that should you really love yourself as you are well if it's unchangeable then yes
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why not you have something that can't be changed um but you should be glad your brain is pestering you to
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improve so if you have a brain that keeps saying you should be doing more um a lot of people complain about
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that because they think oh man i'm always feeling inadequate i'm feeling like i'm not doing enough
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well maybe you're not and maybe this is exactly what should be happening maybe maybe your brain
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should be telling you why don't you do a little more you know try a little harder that might be the
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healthiest situation you could be in so don't be mad if your brain is pestering you to improve you should
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thank it um do you ever see somebody who needs your advice
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it's really hard to give advice isn't it have you ever noticed that you almost can't give advice
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and the reason is nobody wants to feel like you know more than they do especially a peer
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you know they never want to say you know uh if you just do what i tell you to do then your life
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will be good that's not really people aren't comfortable with that not at all so instead of
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giving people advice which they will just automatically reject you give them information
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or maybe empathy or maybe there's something specific they need help organizing their thoughts
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but don't ever put it in the form of you know if i were you my advice it's better to just give them
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information that they don't have you know such as you know did you know this website has this
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information that's not really advice that's just telling them something telling people something works
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that's good all right how about this one uh here's what i learned
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many years ago when i worked at a resort people would come in and they would complain and we were
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taught to take on a work order like a physical piece of paper a work order and and write down the
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complaints right in front of them because that would make them feel like they're you know doing more
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so we take off the work the work order write down what they said
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and then we were actually told this by our boss i'm not making this up
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that depending on the complaint it might not be something you could fix
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some people you know guests at the hotel would complain about things like
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uh they need a certain different mattress or something and there's just basically there's no way to
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make that happen so instead of making it happen we were taught to write it down as if we were going
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to make it happen and then throw it away after they leave
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and the thinking behind this uh is that what people really wanted was to be heard
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now they would also like their little complaint to be fixed but even bigger than that they want to make
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sure they complained you heard it and they felt powerful because you know some action happened
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as far as they know so yeah so it was purely a theatrical situation all right um people who
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complain don't want solutions sometimes they just like complaining that's the reframe
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did you ever meet somebody who had a strong personality did you ever ever hear anybody uh describe that way
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oh uh i'm going to introduce you to beth beth has a well beth has a how do i say this a strong personality
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run run run from beth you do not want to be around people with strong personalities
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because that's just a way to hide the fact that somebody's hard to deal with somebody might be a little
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bit toxic if you know what i mean strong personality indeed you're toxic
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i've told you before that if you have a compliment in mind that's almost immoral to withhold it
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so that's sort of a reframe you've heard this one before but it's worth doing again
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um giving somebody a compliment just automatically puts them on your side till the end of time so it's
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good for them if it's a sincere compliment and it's good for you so why wouldn't you do it as much
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as you could well you don't want to be like a weirdo over complimenter but it's hard to get there
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to be an over a complimenter because when somebody is receiving the compliment they never feel like it's
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too much so just pour it on just pour on the compliments now i do that in my my personal life
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but the rule is it has to be real like you actually have to mean it it doesn't count if you just
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oh what would be a good compliment that doesn't count it should be something you're thinking and
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all right about this uh no one seems to find me attractive or no one wants to date me or nobody
00:24:47.760
wants to marry me um the reframe of that is you just haven't met enough people you could take anyone
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in the world and just introduce them to people over and over again and eventually
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they'd find somebody they fell in love with it's just sort of a numbers game so there's no such thing
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as not being able to find somebody who likes you there's only such a thing as i've not yet met enough
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people because if you meet enough people the numbers are on your side sooner or later you're going to meet
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somebody you like and vice versa um here's one i need to this would be the usual frame i need to go find
00:25:32.800
someone to be my romantic partner have you ever had that thought that you need to go out and find
00:25:40.720
yourself a romantic partner and you're actually thinking of it that way you're not just thinking
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oh whatever happens happens but you're thinking i'm gonna go find myself a romantic partner that's
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what i need well that's the old way of thinking of it uh it would be better to say you need to signal
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your genetic advantage to attract a romantic partner what i mean by that is if you can somehow signal
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that you're better than most people at some task some skill could be mental it could be physical
00:26:14.400
you're either the best at a sport you're the best at chess you're the best at making money you're the
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best at just knowing things so there are a million things you could be the best at or just you know
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one of the best wherever you are and instead of trying to turn somebody into your romantic partner which
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is weird and creepy all you do is you just live your life but you make sure that other people notice
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that as you're living your life you're doing something really well then people want to mate
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with you you have to look like you have at least one genetic some kind of oddity or advantage it
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doesn't matter what it is it could be mental it could be physical it could be attractiveness
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you gotta have at least one thing that people look at and go oh that's that's kind of special
00:27:07.200
and if you do not have even one thing in your life not even one thing that you do better than
00:27:17.280
other people nothing well then you you develop that usually all you need to be to do you know all you need
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to do to be one of the best at anything now this is an exaggeration of course but you get the point
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is to do it more than other people you can be the best tennis player you know by playing more tennis
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than the people you know you just do it for a long time and then pretty soon you're the best
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tennis player you know so look for something where you can be the impressive one no matter what that is
00:27:51.920
all right um here is one sometimes uh your partner or your mate let's say your romantic partner
00:28:06.640
will ask you to share in the decision and what are you thinking when that happens oh no no my partner
00:28:16.000
wants to blame me when we pick the wrong restaurant or something no i don't want to share in these decisions
00:28:22.880
but instead of uh saying that you need a decision say you need a co-pilot to share the blame
00:28:31.280
i think it's funnier if you just say hey i need somebody to share the blame
00:28:39.120
no i think that would be funny now this one's just for fun all right um
00:28:44.560
a lot of people used to think that marriage was about finding your soul mate how many of you think
00:28:53.840
that well some of you think you did find your soul mate and so you would say yes that's exactly what
00:28:59.840
it is and if you were as awesome as me you would have found yours too um but i would say that marriage
00:29:06.800
is not about finding a soul mate i think marriage is about finding love with someone who values promises
00:29:13.920
it's not obvious why that works is it i'm gonna leave that one there and that that'll be your homework
00:29:55.440
oh here's one that i heard from a friend i'm not sure where it came from
00:30:00.800
but it's a good one if you're in a relationship that ends instead of crying about your relationship
00:30:09.280
ending wouldn't it be better to smile because it happened so don't cry about it ending be happy
00:30:19.120
that it ever happened that one i use all the time i think you can convince yourself to be happy that
00:30:27.040
something happened um let's see here's one for dealing with your team that i've never seen work
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so so maybe this one's a bad idea but you could try it at home if you tried it at home and it doesn't
00:30:46.400
work or it does work let me know but here's the idea so this would be for a team um
00:30:53.680
um so the usual frame is you tell your teen they can't understand the reason
00:31:00.880
for what you're telling them did you ever tell your kid because i said so
00:31:06.640
and that's considered good parenting right because i said so why do i have to go to bed at midnight
00:31:13.840
because i said so um that's fine but if you've got one of those teens who's ultra rational to the
00:31:20.800
point of being a pain in the ass and some of you do and they want to debate you here's the ultimate
00:31:27.760
teenager debate kill shot it goes like this um a parent is able to guide a young brain
00:31:37.440
they're not capable of understanding adult reasons now you'd want to put that in your own words but the
00:31:42.880
idea is that the teenage brain is incomplete so no adult over the age of 25 should have a debate
00:31:55.200
with somebody who's under 25 because the under 25s don't even have a developed brain
00:32:00.080
what would be the point of that so the point of the adult guiding the younger person is that the
00:32:07.840
adult has a mature brain so if i disagree with a team i don't say you're wrong i'm right because
00:32:15.440
that's just a fight you say ah that's probably what i would have thought before my brain was mature
00:32:22.400
you see the difference yeah that's probably what i would have thought before my brain was mature
00:32:27.280
oh i thought that when i was your age too but my job as the adult is to navigate you through
00:32:34.720
a place where your brain is not yet developed enough to handle the situation so whenever you and i
00:32:43.600
disagree about what you should be doing next the smart play is to listen to me because i've been there
00:32:50.400
before the the worst play is to listen to yourself because we don't know about you but i've done all those
00:33:00.640
things you yeah you haven't so listen to the more mature brain try that more the more mature brain
00:33:07.440
approach see how that works it won't work i'm still waiting for the one person that works with
00:33:13.600
mostly other words other ones will work with everybody but that one's pretty specific all right um
00:33:20.960
um oh here's one what if uh what if people treat you poorly um and you find out there's not much you
00:33:30.880
can do about it what do you do about that people treat you poorly and you're thinking there's not
00:33:37.280
much you can do about it well here's the reframe the reframe is that you cause people to treat you the
00:33:45.760
way they do people people don't treat you the way they do for their own reasons there's something you
00:33:53.760
project could be your look could be your mannerism could be the situation that you appeared in but um
00:34:03.440
you you largely cause people to treat you the way they treat you and this is something you don't notice
00:34:09.840
since you reach a certain age because when you're young it's really hard to get anybody to treat you
00:34:15.680
well because adults just don't care and other teenagers you know they have no special respect for
00:34:22.960
you you're just another kid so um anyway just just assume that uh the way you act causes people to see
00:34:34.000
you the way they see you and when they see you the way they see you that's how they decide how to act
00:34:40.160
so you can you can basically hypnotize them just by who you are and how you act
00:34:50.160
this episode is brought to you by defender with its 626 horsepower twin turbo v8 engine
00:34:57.280
the defender okta is taking on the dakar rally the ultimate off-road challenge learn more at landrover.ca
00:35:12.640
um how about this one oh this one i used the other day this is a brilliant one uh the old
00:35:20.000
reframe is that the boss is in charge obviously right the boss by definition of being a boss
00:35:27.760
the boss is clearly in charge but if you think that it leaves some opportunities on the table
00:35:35.360
so i i prefer a reframe instead of the bosses in charge it's more true to say
00:35:41.440
the person with the best ideas is always in charge because if the boss doesn't have any good ideas
00:35:49.200
where are they going to get one from somebody else
00:35:52.000
if you're the person who has a good idea people are going to do what you want them to do because
00:35:58.640
you're the only one with a good idea so don't think in terms of power all the time sometimes you
00:36:04.320
have to think in terms of having the best idea having the most useful solution being the person that
00:36:12.240
they want to invite to be on the projects think in those terms
00:36:18.480
then there's the basket case theory the theory that most people look like they have their act together
00:36:27.520
and you think to yourself hmm i wish i were like that person they have their act together
00:36:33.840
but they don't know that i don't no that's not what's happened
00:36:40.800
i can almost guarantee you that other people do not have their act together they might act like they do
00:36:48.560
but that is just an act so the basket case theory is that everyone's a basket case once you get to know
00:36:54.560
them the only people who are not basket cases are people you just don't know well enough but if he did
00:37:03.200
you'd know basket case all right um here's a really important one that i try to live by
00:37:12.640
i tried not to judge people by their mistakes have you heard me say that before don't judge people by
00:37:19.760
their mistakes and boy is that hard not to do instead judge them by how they respond to their
00:37:28.000
mistake do they crack something do they change something do they apologize do they make it make
00:37:33.360
it right because that's the person i want if you're looking for people who don't make mistakes well good
00:37:39.600
luck you're not you're not going to do too well with that but what if you find people who
00:37:45.200
do do make mistakes like everybody but they're really good at dealing with a mistake well that's gold
00:38:03.520
i'm gonna skip that one oh here's one the usual frame you've heard this before it's an old saying
00:38:10.160
that uh small acts of kindness can go a long way small acts of kindness um i would reframe this
00:38:20.960
to say that there are no small acts of kindness any act of kindness will seem huge
00:38:27.840
to the recipient it only seems small to you and that ladies and gentlemen
00:38:33.280
is most of but not all the reframes in the social life chapter
00:38:47.280
now if you're just checking in you may have found that x wasn't working today or
00:38:53.520
maybe something else wasn't working i don't know what else is working
00:38:56.000
well a few things are working looks like rumbles working and i don't know did locals disappear
00:39:02.320
locals looks like it might be working and youtube is working the best 4.5 000
00:39:10.000
all right so if you're just joining we're doing an experiment in which i see if i can do a show
00:39:17.600
without any preparation because the internet was broken so i didn't get to prepare
00:39:22.400
um and so i learned from my dale carnegie course how to always have something ready
00:39:31.680
you notice how i always had something ready in this case the reframes were just sort of a natural
00:39:36.480
thing you could do but i could have taken questions i could have said oh today we're only going to talk
00:39:42.640
about you know all the things in the epstein file except that's boring so but in general you should always
00:39:50.160
have a backup uh presentation so if your regular presentation gets lost the digital file gets
00:39:57.040
lost whatever happens you can just stand up in front of a bunch of people and do a presentation
00:40:05.360
so will you see how easily i can do it yeah yeah you see how effortless this is and it's only because
00:40:14.000
a practice it's a practice it's not effortless because i have some natural skill it's effortless
00:40:19.440
because i've done it most of my adult life and the more you practice the easier it is
00:40:26.640
all right ladies and gentlemen it's a 7 40 and i'm going to assume that longer is not better in this
00:40:36.880
particular case so we're going to wind down uh we'll see you tomorrow uh when we figure out who
00:40:45.600
cares about the epstein files and all those other things and uh i hope this was at least a little bit
00:40:51.600
entertaining to you i hope you learned that no matter how scary it is you can figure out how to make it
00:40:57.200
work you can always figure out how to make it work you don't need to be that prepared you can make most
00:41:04.560
things work if you just jump in and make it work that's just what i'm doing right here so i'm trying
00:41:10.000
to trying to model it as i do it and i will see you all tomorrow i don't think i can go private on locals
00:41:20.720
let me see i'll try to go private i look at locals but i might just disappear
00:41:36.000
okay i i don't know what happened when i clicked that so it doesn't look like i can go
00:41:40.640
private so i guess i'll just see you all tomorrow tomorrow