Real Coffee with Scott Adams - January 16, 2020


Episode 789 Scott Adams： #Shampeachment Theater, Liz and Bernie, Lev Parnas, China Deal


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour

Words per Minute

144.783

Word Count

8,735

Sentence Count

620

Misogynist Sentences

9

Hate Speech Sentences

12


Summary

Darryl Paltrow joins me to talk about Elizabeth Warren stabbing Bernie Sanders and how the left is eating itself, and how to deal with people who repeat themselves in a debate. Plus, Wendy Williams is in hot water for mocking Joaquin Phoenix in public.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Hey everybody, I hope you can hear me when I plug in my microphone after I've already started.
00:00:19.620 Sorry, I'm a little late. I'm late because there's so much news. There's news all over
00:00:26.000 the place and it's good and it's fun and it's the good kind. It's the funny kind. It's the best
00:00:31.400 kind. And all you need to enjoy the news today is a cup or a mug or a glass, a tank or chalice
00:00:39.660 or stein, a canteen jug or flask, a vessel of any kind. Fill it with your favorite liquid. I like
00:00:45.860 coffee. Join me now for the unparalleled pleasure, the dopamine of the day, the thing that makes
00:00:51.400 everything better, the simultaneous sip. Go.
00:00:56.000 I know, I'm three minutes late. Why? Good reasons. Good reasons. When you see the quality
00:01:06.320 of today's Periscope, you're going to say to yourself, I'm glad I waited the extra three
00:01:12.820 minutes. Wow. It's blowing me away. It's so good. First of all, I'd like to start with
00:01:22.120 a tip. If you saw today's Dilbert comic, you know, it's about the topic of people who repeat
00:01:28.720 themselves. Have you ever been in a debate with somebody who keeps repeating the same
00:01:34.460 point? And you say to yourself, you say to them, no, I understand your point, but here's
00:01:41.000 what I'm saying. And then they'll just say that same point again, as if you had not addressed
00:01:46.500 it, here's what you do. After about the third or fourth time that the person you're talking
00:01:52.740 with says exactly the same point, say, hold on a second. Let me write this down. You
00:01:59.600 take a little note and a paper and you say, all right, I will stipulate. And you write
00:02:04.760 down the sentence. Bob says that it involved birds or whatever it is. Doesn't matter. You
00:02:12.420 put it on a little piece of paper and you put it on the table between the two of you face
00:02:16.800 up so it can be read. And then you start your conversation again. And at that point, when
00:02:27.640 the person starts repeating themselves, this is what you do. You just reach over to the
00:02:32.180 piece of paper and you just slowly move it a few inches in their direction. And it's going
00:02:37.920 to make them mad. Then wait until they repeat it again, because they will. And then again,
00:02:45.840 reach over and take the little note that says exactly what they just said and just move it
00:02:50.940 a little bit closer to them. Eventually, the person will get really angry at you and storm
00:02:56.540 out of the room. Victory. All right. Let's talk about the Democrats or let's say the left
00:03:04.160 is in complete self-immolation mode. They've turned on each other. It's a wonderful sight to
00:03:11.280 see. And you're seeing it all over. Did you see the story about Wendy Williams mocking Joaquin
00:03:18.540 Phoenix for a, let's say, I don't even want to say. I'm not even going to say. But let's say it's
00:03:26.280 something physical. It was one of the worst things I've ever seen on television. When I saw it,
00:03:32.100 I thought, seriously, that's what you're mocking? You're mocking this guy for that in public?
00:03:41.380 Well, she had to apologize. And it's not up to anybody except Joaquin Phoenix to accept it or not.
00:03:47.440 But the trouble that she got into is one more example of the left eating itself.
00:03:55.400 But my favorite is Michael Moore, who is quite distressed that Warren and Bernie Sanders are at
00:04:07.380 each other. And he says, they both appeared in my films. I love them both. Why Elizabeth chose to
00:04:13.960 stick a knife in Bernie's back is beyond me. Well, it's not really beyond me. So let me explain this to
00:04:23.760 Michael Moore. There's this thing called the presidential election that's coming up. And
00:04:30.280 there's this thing called the primary. There are people in the primaries who want to win.
00:04:36.840 And then they do things like that, because that's how you win. Did it work? Totally.
00:04:43.680 Now, a lot of you said, Oh, Elizabeth Warren, it sounds like you're, you're causing trouble. You said you
00:04:50.780 wouldn't, you're stabbing Bernie, that seems bad. You know, sort of a bad look, and all that.
00:04:57.900 But a day later, totally worked. I would say that Operation Stab Bernie in the back was a complete
00:05:06.440 success. If you saw the panel that, well, actually, most of the pundits said, well, the big moment from
00:05:14.100 the debate was when Elizabeth Warren said that the only people on the stage who had ever won any
00:05:20.580 elections were the women. Actually, the others had won elections. But they had also lost, I think,
00:05:28.040 10 elections. But the women had won every election. Tremendously good political point. So from a point of
00:05:40.320 controlling the conversation, moving people's attention where you wanted to move it, I'm going
00:05:46.900 to say Elizabeth Warren, A+++. She totally changed the conversation, made it about the, sort of
00:05:56.740 highlighted the fact that it's a bunch of, you know, white people on the stage, which is bad enough.
00:06:02.860 But at least there are some women, right? Because the day before that, we were all talking about, ha ha ha,
00:06:10.820 Democrats are the party of inclusivity, and they just got rid of all of their people of color on the
00:06:16.320 stage. Wasn't that the story two days ago? Two days ago, that was the story. Not anymore. What's the story
00:06:24.400 today? Thanks to Elizabeth Warren, the story today is, hey, there's still two women on the stage, and
00:06:32.800 are we ignoring the fact that they've won all of their elections, and that the men on the stage have
00:06:39.160 10 lost elections collectively? It's a really good point, just in terms of politics. I'm not saying
00:06:47.740 it's a good point in, you know, the world, or that it's a good point logically or rationally or anything
00:06:53.740 else. But politically, wow. So I'm going to say Warren has the play of the week, political play of
00:07:02.840 the week, very successful. I think she actually changed how people are thinking about this.
00:07:08.920 Good job. Now, the real question is, who's lying? Is Bernie lying when he says, I never said a woman
00:07:18.000 can't win, or is Elizabeth Warren lying when she says that he did say that? I have the answer to
00:07:26.100 that, in my opinion, all right? So I can't read minds, but if you, of course, you've all seen it
00:07:32.860 by now, the clip of Elizabeth Warren not shaking hands with Bernie, and CNN magically found a separate
00:07:41.920 audio file that they matched up with the video so you could hear what she was saying. And Elizabeth
00:07:47.140 Warren walks directly over to Bernie and says, you accused me of lying on television. I think,
00:07:54.140 did you say on television or in public? Now, what have I taught you about detecting liars?
00:08:02.980 Liars say things such as, what evidence do you have? Or, you know, why would you make that
00:08:11.600 accusation? Based on what? You know, that's what a liar says. Here's what an honest person says.
00:08:18.760 They get right in your face, and they say, you're a liar. Now, keep in mind that it's not clear that
00:08:27.060 Warren knew that this would be picked up on audio. Some are suggesting she's smart enough to know that
00:08:33.700 there probably was an audio. Some have suggested she was colluding with CNN and that, you know,
00:08:39.460 she knew there would be an audio. I'm not going to say it was that clever. It looked like an honest
00:08:45.640 moment to me. So my impression is that she actually believed Bernie lied. I believe that Elizabeth
00:08:56.720 Warren believes her own story. I also believe, because of everything that Bernie has said and done
00:09:04.640 and his entire career, he's so credible to me and to many of you. But to me, he's completely credible.
00:09:12.620 So you have two versions that both believe their stories, I believe. So my opinion is that they both
00:09:20.960 absolutely do believe their versions of the story. How unusual is that? Not. It's two movies on one screen.
00:09:29.960 Two people were in a room, and when they left the room, they had two different impressions of what
00:09:35.400 happened in the room. How unusual is that? Zero unusuality of it. See, I made up a word. Unusuality.
00:09:44.960 You can use it. Yeah. One of the things about being a professional writer is that if I start using a word,
00:09:52.340 it could enter a common usage. So the unusuality, or maybe it's already a word, but I doubt it.
00:10:00.880 So let me give you another example of exactly this situation, which is also in the news.
00:10:07.040 So there's a story about, let's see, a gentleman, Peter Lucido, who's a Michigan state senator.
00:10:17.120 Now, he's apologized after a female reporter, so a young 20-something reporter, was spending some time
00:10:27.700 with this Michigan state senator, and I guess he said that he was going to be meeting with some high
00:10:33.340 school boys later, and said that she should hang around because it'd be a lot of fun, according to
00:10:40.080 him. So his version is, hey, you should hang around. It's going to be a lot of fun hanging out with
00:10:45.360 these guys from this high school. Hang around a little bit. She says that some version of it was
00:10:53.880 that you'll have a lot of fun with those boys, and they'll have a lot of fun with you, if you know
00:10:58.740 what I mean, or some version of that. So her version of a private conversation between two people,
00:11:05.420 she left the room, and I think she actually believes that he said something with an inappropriate
00:11:11.920 sexual tone to it. If you watched his response, he looks really credible when he says, that didn't
00:11:19.740 happen. I just said it would be fun. It has nothing to do with any kind of sexual anything. Now, it's
00:11:26.520 possible that one of them is just lying, right? But I don't think so. I think they're both telling the
00:11:34.660 truth. Because exactly like Warren and Bernie, I think two people had the same experience,
00:11:43.020 but watched two different movies. And when they left, they both believed their movie.
00:11:48.500 How many times do you need to see people experiencing two different movies in the same place
00:11:55.360 before you understand it's the most normal thing in our experience? It's not the exception.
00:12:03.940 Because if you imagine it's the exception, you say, okay, one of them's lying. It's not one of those
00:12:09.680 weird cases where somebody saw two different movies in the same place. That would be weird. It's not.
00:12:15.980 That's the operating system of human beings. We're subjectively creating our own little
00:12:21.560 environments and worlds all the time. It's the basic way we operate. Once you understand that,
00:12:28.140 everything starts making a little more sense. So that's my preliminary. Maybe it's my final
00:12:34.660 conclusion. Warren telling the truth as she saw it. Bernie telling the truth as he saw it. Two people
00:12:42.660 who are being honest, although Warren may be a little opportunistic by bringing that up at exactly
00:12:49.540 the right time. Seriously, that was just a great, great political play. Ethical? Not so much.
00:12:58.420 But still within the realm of what we expect in our political process. So it's not that far out.
00:13:08.500 We're going to talk about impeachment in a moment. Here's an example of why it's better to be a
00:13:14.840 boomer than a doomer than a doomer. Now, boomers, people like me, my age, we have a lot of experience.
00:13:22.860 We've seen a bunch of things. Does it help? Well, let me give you an example. Today, I saw a message
00:13:30.320 came into me from a social media platform. And it was a writer asking me if I would be interviewed
00:13:37.220 for an article he wants to write on the topic of love and persuasion. And because I talk about
00:13:45.120 persuasion, he thought, oh, I'll ask this cartoonist guy if he will give me some quotes for my article
00:13:52.520 on love and persuasion. What did I say? Because I'm a boomer, and it's not my first day on earth,
00:14:02.160 I said, nope. Nope. Not get anywhere near it. Because can you imagine how many ways that would
00:14:11.860 go wrong? As soon as you throw persuasion and love in the same conversation, nothing can go right from
00:14:19.680 that point on. Whatever I would be quoted as saying would look terrible out of context. Because it would
00:14:26.700 be his context, whatever his article was going to be. It wouldn't be my context. I might be able
00:14:32.060 to do it, but probably not. I mean, I don't even think I could do it if I did everything I could
00:14:37.400 to put it in the right context. It would just seem creepy. All right. So that's one of the advantages
00:14:43.200 of just being around a while. If I were 25, and I got that same request, do you know what I would
00:14:49.020 have said? Ah, free attention. I'm all over it.
00:14:52.920 So, and by the way, OK, doomer, with a D as in dog, as a response to OK, boomer, works really well.
00:15:06.760 Because it does seem that the younger people feel like everything is doomed. Do you know why young
00:15:14.720 people think everything is doomed? Climate science is going to kill us. President Trump's going to blow
00:15:19.700 up the world. Do you know why? Because young people still believe that the news is legitimate.
00:15:27.980 Imagine, a lot of you are, let's say probably half of you are over 40, I'm guessing, roughly. I saw my
00:15:36.360 statistics recently. That's about right. So about half of you are over 40.
00:15:39.940 Have you seen the doom and then, oh, just kidding, process just repeat itself? We're all doomed.
00:15:51.540 Oh, no, I guess it's OK. Oh, no, we're going to die. I guess not. Oh, we're all, we're running out of
00:15:57.580 oil. Not so much. Yeah, it's going to be a nuclear war. Well, it didn't happen. If you see it enough,
00:16:04.920 you become skeptical of everything else. So the doomers, which is a perfect name for them,
00:16:10.960 because they've been sold this story of doom, are walking around in this weird doom bubble that I do
00:16:17.820 not envy. Now, when I was a child, I grew up in the era in which we thought Russia was going to nuke
00:16:29.200 us at any moment. We actually had a nuclear bomb shelter in my house. Now, it wasn't very effective
00:16:36.160 because it was just a basement. But my father wasn't exactly a radiation expert, let's say.
00:16:43.960 So he built a little bomb shelter in the basement. And I actually didn't think I would grow up to
00:16:49.940 adulthood. I actually believed the odds were very good that I would be killed in a nuclear war.
00:16:56.940 And that was my childhood. A childhood where you actually expected that there was a high likelihood
00:17:02.980 you'd die in a nuclear fireball. All right, let's talk about impeachment. Because I know you want
00:17:16.160 to do that. So I've been calling this an emotional impeachment. And I don't think I've ever branded
00:17:25.460 anything better. Because once you consider that even the Democrats think there's no real chance
00:17:32.140 that the president will be removed from his office, then what was the point? Isn't the point of
00:17:38.400 impeachment you're trying to remove him? But if you know that's not going to work, why are you doing
00:17:43.660 it? Well, of course, there's the political part. And Pelosi said it directly. She said that the
00:17:51.080 president would always have this stain of impeachment would be dogging him forever. She used her own
00:17:57.420 words. But she basically put it in terms of, ha ha, I gotcha. That's it. Ha ha, I stained you.
00:18:07.680 That's why they did it. Because it feels just personal and emotional and completely irrational.
00:18:14.640 Now, I get that they think it's going to work maybe for elections. But that would be dumb. Because
00:18:21.180 I think they should have been able to predict that it would help his fundraising, it would galvanize
00:18:26.280 his base. Exactly what happened. It's the same thing that happened to Bernie Sanders. His fundraising
00:18:32.020 went through the roof when Sanders, when Warren attacked him. So was Pelosi not wise enough to know
00:18:39.600 that this would work in the president's favor, when there's a pretty good track record to suggest,
00:18:45.400 especially with Bill Clinton, to suggest it probably would. So if it wasn't to remove him from office,
00:18:53.000 and it wasn't even to hurt him in the election, really, unless you make the case that it's all about
00:18:59.800 getting Democratic senators elected the next time they have a chance to do that,
00:19:05.580 it just looks like it was emotional. It looked like it was an emotional impeachment.
00:19:13.800 So I've joked that so far the impeachment trial looks like a combination of three movies.
00:19:19.280 Did you see the little impeachment parade? Okay, I watched the impeachment parade live because I
00:19:25.440 thought it would be hilarious. It was a little funnier than I had hoped. Because they were all trying to
00:19:31.920 take serious and somber after they'd all been yucking it up with Nancy handing out the 20 ceremonial pens.
00:19:40.980 They're trying not to look like they're happy about the day. So they're doing the somber march.
00:19:47.740 We are sombering. It is a solemn day. Let us solemnly march with our little black suits.
00:19:55.160 And Nancy's pink, but we're wearing our little black suits.
00:19:58.340 And it looked like there were three movies that had been put together as a trilogy.
00:20:04.080 The first movie, if you've ever seen March of the Penguins,
00:20:07.000 it looked like a bunch of penguins.
00:20:10.960 You know, you had Nadler there, the monarch penguin.
00:20:14.760 But they all sort of had these black suits, and they all were like,
00:20:18.160 walking down, not talking.
00:20:20.580 So you've got March of the Penguins.
00:20:22.780 Then, of course, the trial is just going to be Dumb and Dumber.
00:20:26.560 I don't know how it could go any other way.
00:20:29.100 It's going to be Dumb and Dumber.
00:20:31.880 You know, you don't have to wait for the details.
00:20:34.280 That's what it's going to be.
00:20:35.640 And in the end, we know how it ends.
00:20:38.220 Titanic.
00:20:39.400 It's a three-movie trilogy.
00:20:41.120 March of the Penguins, Dumb and Dumber, and Titanic.
00:20:43.500 That's the whole impeachment trial.
00:20:45.460 Boom.
00:20:45.700 Do you want to know how the impeachment should go?
00:20:54.140 Well, let me tell you.
00:20:57.240 I tweeted this out.
00:21:00.760 And, you know, people keep accusing me, of course,
00:21:06.380 of always supporting the president and his team and everything.
00:21:09.640 But I've said over and over that I think the Republicans have totally botched
00:21:14.040 their defense of the president in terms of this whole Ukraine thing
00:21:19.600 and the quid pro quo and all that.
00:21:21.760 Here's why it's botched.
00:21:23.860 And the Senate has a chance to make good of this.
00:21:27.580 So here's what I tweeted in terms of how the Senate should handle the impeachment trial.
00:21:36.300 Two steps.
00:21:37.300 Step number one, ask both the Democrats, their top lawyer, which lawyer was it?
00:21:46.040 Feldman.
00:21:47.380 One of the Democrats' lawyers admitted in the last round of impeachment hearings,
00:21:54.080 he admitted that there was a legitimate reason to look into Burisma and the Bidens.
00:21:59.200 So question number one, you ask a Democrat lawyer and then you ask a Republican lawyer.
00:22:06.040 It doesn't matter who.
00:22:07.140 Turley could be, you know, Dershowitz.
00:22:11.400 And you say, based on what we know, was there a legitimate U.S. national interest
00:22:18.280 in understanding what was going on with Burisma and the Bidens?
00:22:22.020 Now, the answer is going to be yes, because both the Democrats and the Republicans are going
00:22:28.620 to say, yeah, kind of had to look into that.
00:22:32.620 Step two, vote.
00:22:36.900 Just vote, because that's the only thing that matters.
00:22:41.500 The Democrats have correctly, completely bamboozled and owned the Republicans by making them talk
00:22:48.880 about the topic of whether it was for the president's own self-interest.
00:22:54.560 It's not relevant.
00:22:57.380 It's not.
00:22:58.800 And every moment that the Republicans argued that it, you know, argued the case of was it a quid pro quo,
00:23:06.920 any of those details about who said what, who wrote what, who was in the meeting,
00:23:11.620 as soon as the Republicans engage in any of that, they've lost.
00:23:16.380 Because most of the trick from the Democrats is to get them to engage in all the details.
00:23:23.020 Because the more you're thinking about the details, the more you're thinking about impeachment,
00:23:27.500 and the more it's bad for the president.
00:23:29.480 It just gets you in that, my God, there's all this stuff.
00:23:32.940 Why are we talking about it?
00:23:34.000 It must be important because we're talking about it.
00:23:36.380 Complete mistake.
00:23:38.060 Total mistake.
00:23:39.860 Even the House should have done the same thing.
00:23:42.240 We've got one question.
00:23:43.360 Was it legitimate for the United States to look into this Burisma-Biden situation?
00:23:50.460 The answer is yes.
00:23:52.320 Democrats will say yes.
00:23:54.120 Republicans will say yes.
00:23:56.380 That's the end.
00:23:58.380 It doesn't matter if it's also good for the president's re-election.
00:24:03.340 It doesn't matter.
00:24:05.000 Completely irrelevant.
00:24:06.180 The Senate should say, this is a big, complicated thing, but it comes down to one question.
00:24:12.840 Was there a U.S. legitimate interest?
00:24:15.520 Yes, say Democrats.
00:24:17.440 Yes, say Republicans.
00:24:19.720 Bipartisan.
00:24:21.340 Let's vote.
00:24:22.700 If they have witnesses,
00:24:24.120 well, the only reason to have witnesses is if they already know what Bolton and anybody else is going to say,
00:24:32.680 and that it doesn't add anything to it,
00:24:34.660 and what they'd really love is to bring Hunter Biden in.
00:24:37.860 Now, the Democrats are arguing that bringing Hunter Biden in doesn't make sense
00:24:41.580 because he's not a fact witness,
00:24:44.940 meaning he's not a direct witness to any of the conversations between Ukraine and the president
00:24:50.920 and the president and his staff.
00:24:53.080 He's outside of that circle,
00:24:54.860 so therefore he's irrelevant.
00:24:56.980 Wrong.
00:24:58.560 Completely wrong.
00:25:00.140 Why?
00:25:01.000 Because there's only one question.
00:25:03.440 The one question that matters,
00:25:05.860 did the United States have a legitimate reason to look into Burisma and the Bidens?
00:25:10.200 How do you know the answer to that question without talking to Hunter Biden and saying,
00:25:15.780 we've got a few questions for you?
00:25:17.680 You know, it might not answer all of our questions,
00:25:19.680 but we'll at least find out if there's something that was sketchy enough
00:25:25.040 that the president had a legitimate reason to look into it.
00:25:28.920 Could be there's nothing there.
00:25:30.520 I mean, nothing beyond the obvious swampiness that we see.
00:25:36.700 So that's the way it should go.
00:25:38.120 Anyway, there's this other sub-story about Giuliani telling Lev Parnas,
00:25:45.600 who was, I guess, some loose associate who was helping over in Ukraine,
00:25:51.640 and apparently there's a distinction that the Democrats are trying to make
00:25:58.260 between Giuliani working for the government,
00:26:01.520 you know, doing what's good for the United States,
00:26:04.040 versus what's doing, what's good only for Trump's re-election.
00:26:08.360 In other words, only something that's personally good for him.
00:26:11.520 And Giuliani apparently was telling people, including Lev Parnas,
00:26:16.440 that he wanted to be very clear that he represents the president, not the government.
00:26:23.000 So he's the president's personal attorney, not the government.
00:26:27.620 How should you interpret that?
00:26:29.960 Well, one way to interpret is, oh, that's proof.
00:26:33.120 It's proof it wasn't for the country.
00:26:35.660 It's proof it was just for Trump's own good re-election.
00:26:39.400 No.
00:26:40.560 That's only one way to interpret it.
00:26:42.880 Here's the other way to interpret it.
00:26:45.480 Giuliani did not have official government, let's say, portfolio.
00:26:50.420 He was not appointed.
00:26:52.940 He was not elected.
00:26:54.380 He had not registered as some kind of a lobbyist, I'm sure.
00:26:58.660 From a legal perspective, if you're a lawyer,
00:27:02.140 wouldn't you like to make it clear to everybody
00:27:04.320 that you're not officially working for the U.S. government?
00:27:09.180 Probably.
00:27:10.120 It probably has some specific legal importance
00:27:12.980 that he needed to say,
00:27:14.900 no, I'm not an official emissary from the government,
00:27:17.460 because I would imagine that would put him
00:27:20.100 under some different legal constraints.
00:27:23.800 But here's the thing.
00:27:25.260 If Giuliani says, I represent Trump,
00:27:28.580 can you separate that from Trump's job?
00:27:33.980 The answer is you can't.
00:27:36.280 I've had lawyers, lots of lawyers.
00:27:39.060 In fact, I fired one of my lawyers last week.
00:27:41.120 I got lots of lawyers for different phases of my business.
00:27:44.520 There's the contract lawyers,
00:27:45.960 there's other kinds of lawyers.
00:27:50.920 And here's the thing.
00:27:54.520 Do my lawyers, no matter what field they're working in,
00:27:58.880 do my lawyers make a distinction
00:28:00.620 between me personally
00:28:02.560 and me, the creator of Dilber,
00:28:05.360 who has a job and a public figure?
00:28:07.260 The answer is no.
00:28:08.800 No, they don't.
00:28:09.740 Because if they did,
00:28:10.660 I'd fire him.
00:28:13.940 Because I am a complete person
00:28:15.980 who is me personally
00:28:18.140 and me, my profession.
00:28:19.560 You can't separate that.
00:28:21.760 So what does it mean to say
00:28:22.940 that Giuliani is the president's personal lawyer?
00:28:27.220 It doesn't mean
00:28:28.320 he's not concerned with the job
00:28:30.860 of being president.
00:28:32.320 Of course he is.
00:28:34.140 Because otherwise you couldn't serve the client,
00:28:36.540 which is the person.
00:28:38.380 So,
00:28:38.840 I don't know that that means anything,
00:28:42.380 that Giuliani said he's personally representing the president,
00:28:45.300 because you can't really separate out the profession from that.
00:28:47.700 It's not a thing.
00:28:48.300 Now,
00:28:52.140 here's the funniest part.
00:28:54.460 So yesterday,
00:28:55.260 I heard this story
00:28:57.000 that I didn't even understand
00:28:58.720 and it didn't make any sense.
00:29:01.380 I'm noticing my numbers are way down today.
00:29:03.560 It must be because the impeachment's on.
00:29:05.280 Are people watching the impeachment live right now?
00:29:09.600 So this guy,
00:29:10.540 Lev Parnes,
00:29:13.860 well,
00:29:14.880 we got from the documents that were produced
00:29:17.180 that this guy Robert Hyde,
00:29:19.700 who is a prominent Trump donor,
00:29:21.620 so some rich Trump donor,
00:29:24.820 was making in some messages
00:29:27.720 that Lev Parnes
00:29:28.600 was suggesting that he had
00:29:30.460 the Ukraine ambassador,
00:29:32.960 Yovanovitch,
00:29:34.160 under some kind of surveillance.
00:29:36.920 And I saw those messages
00:29:38.200 and I thought,
00:29:39.860 what?
00:29:41.900 Because when I read it,
00:29:43.460 did I have something on my lip?
00:29:45.840 When I read it,
00:29:47.180 I did not get that out of it.
00:29:51.920 So a lot of people
00:29:52.780 were reading those messages
00:29:53.860 and they seemed to be getting
00:29:55.160 some kind of a point out of it
00:29:57.860 that I wasn't getting when I read it.
00:30:00.120 And it took me a day
00:30:01.020 to figure out what they were seeing.
00:30:03.400 And what they were seeing
00:30:04.480 is that it seemed to indicate
00:30:06.180 that this rich Trump donor,
00:30:09.240 Robert Hyde,
00:30:10.040 somehow was involved
00:30:12.160 in direct
00:30:13.820 monitoring or investigating
00:30:18.520 or like stalking
00:30:20.020 this ambassador in Ukraine.
00:30:23.760 When I read it,
00:30:25.060 I just thought,
00:30:25.840 well, that just sounds like crazy talk.
00:30:28.300 So my impression was,
00:30:30.100 it looks like crazy talk.
00:30:31.560 I didn't think anything of it.
00:30:32.780 And I didn't even know
00:30:33.860 what other people were seeing.
00:30:36.000 So he was asked by,
00:30:38.100 and this is just,
00:30:38.800 this is just so funny.
00:30:41.420 This was my favorite part of the day.
00:30:43.260 So he gets interviewed
00:30:44.020 by Rachel Maddow.
00:30:45.640 And he says,
00:30:49.700 no, that text message you saw
00:30:51.240 was just this Robert,
00:30:52.880 this Hyde guy.
00:30:54.280 He was just drunk.
00:30:56.620 Now Maddow,
00:30:58.420 cleverly,
00:30:59.220 because she's very smart,
00:31:00.780 whether you like Rachel Maddow or not,
00:31:03.560 we'd all agree she's super smart.
00:31:05.880 So she sees the flaw in this
00:31:07.560 and she says
00:31:08.620 that Hyde's texts,
00:31:11.140 which were sort of
00:31:12.140 on the same similar topic,
00:31:13.680 went on for several days.
00:31:16.700 So the explanation
00:31:18.000 that he was drunk
00:31:19.100 doesn't really fit the evidence.
00:31:22.500 And here's just the best thing.
00:31:26.260 Parnasse quickly noted,
00:31:30.520 he's drunk the whole time,
00:31:32.080 Parnasse responded.
00:31:33.460 He wakes up and he's drunk.
00:31:35.360 He starts at six.
00:31:37.060 I'd never seen him not drunk.
00:31:38.780 That's the star witness.
00:31:45.560 The best evidence they've ever had
00:31:47.680 against this president
00:31:48.720 is somebody who starts drinking
00:31:50.760 at six in the morning.
00:31:52.840 Oh, can it be better than that?
00:31:55.440 It can't be better than that.
00:31:58.060 I mean, it really can't be better than that.
00:31:59.840 So not only is Rachel Maddow
00:32:03.380 interviewing the person,
00:32:06.860 this Lev Parnasse,
00:32:08.060 who, based on just the little bit
00:32:10.520 I've heard,
00:32:11.940 I thought was the least credible person
00:32:15.280 on the planet Earth.
00:32:16.780 And I thought to myself,
00:32:18.020 you know,
00:32:19.340 your whole case is built around
00:32:20.840 this Lev Parnasse guy.
00:32:22.380 And from what I can tell,
00:32:23.960 I mean, I don't know him personally,
00:32:26.220 but it feels like he might be
00:32:27.680 the least credible person
00:32:29.200 I've ever heard in my life.
00:32:32.040 But he's not.
00:32:33.820 The least credible person
00:32:35.520 you've ever heard of in your life
00:32:37.500 is the guy who was texting him
00:32:39.060 drunk at six in the morning.
00:32:42.720 That guy was a little less credible.
00:32:46.100 So if you look back at the messages
00:32:47.920 and you say to yourself,
00:32:49.200 okay, now let's put the drunk filter on it.
00:32:52.000 Do those look like drunk messages?
00:32:54.900 Yeah.
00:32:56.180 Yeah, they do.
00:32:57.680 They look pretty drunk to me.
00:33:00.740 So there's that.
00:33:04.120 Devin Nunes getting a little heat
00:33:06.380 because I guess he had said
00:33:08.100 that he didn't know
00:33:09.140 who Lev Parnasse was.
00:33:11.660 But we have now learned
00:33:14.140 that there was, I think,
00:33:15.640 one phone call
00:33:16.520 that Nunes took,
00:33:19.540 which he says he did not remember.
00:33:21.960 Now, if you're Democrats,
00:33:23.340 how do you react to that?
00:33:25.380 Liar!
00:33:26.820 Liar!
00:33:28.060 He's a liar!
00:33:29.560 Because he said he didn't know
00:33:30.660 who this Lev Parnasse guy was,
00:33:35.100 but now we have proof
00:33:36.060 that he had a phone call with him.
00:33:38.520 Liar!
00:33:39.880 Well, that's what inexperienced people say.
00:33:42.760 Here's what experienced people say.
00:33:47.280 They say exactly what
00:33:49.000 Devin Nunes said.
00:33:53.480 He said,
00:33:54.140 I'm in Congress.
00:33:56.820 I'm paraphrasing.
00:33:58.500 Do you know how many people
00:33:59.520 we meet and talk to
00:34:00.960 in an average day?
00:34:02.000 A lot!
00:34:05.060 How many of them
00:34:06.380 would he remember their names
00:34:08.840 and have some lasting memory of?
00:34:13.600 10%?
00:34:14.700 20%?
00:34:15.780 Of all the people he meets,
00:34:17.380 how many does he actually
00:34:18.260 remember their names
00:34:19.160 a year later?
00:34:20.980 No more than 10%.
00:34:22.600 So, if you're an inexperienced person
00:34:25.740 or, let's say,
00:34:27.260 an artist,
00:34:28.940 you might say to yourself,
00:34:30.580 well, if he talked to the guy,
00:34:32.440 he obviously knows him.
00:34:34.420 If you've done anything
00:34:35.760 in your life
00:34:36.460 that involves
00:34:37.240 meeting lots of people,
00:34:39.860 and this is my life as well,
00:34:41.840 do you know how many people
00:34:42.800 I meet?
00:34:44.060 Do you know how many people
00:34:45.100 send me a message
00:34:46.080 and I communicate with them?
00:34:48.380 Today,
00:34:49.060 before I got on here,
00:34:50.420 I communicated with
00:34:51.640 maybe
00:34:53.160 12 people
00:34:56.300 whose names
00:34:57.220 I'd never seen before
00:34:58.220 that I actually
00:34:59.060 directly had a
00:35:00.140 communication with.
00:35:01.440 Now, most of them
00:35:02.140 were on LinkedIn.
00:35:03.800 People were messaging me
00:35:04.860 and I was just saying,
00:35:05.680 hey,
00:35:06.220 responding to
00:35:07.120 queries and questions
00:35:08.580 and stuff.
00:35:09.740 So, now there are
00:35:10.600 12 people
00:35:11.300 just this morning,
00:35:12.920 just today,
00:35:14.320 in my life,
00:35:15.020 I'm just a cartoonist,
00:35:16.440 but in my life,
00:35:18.040 12 new people
00:35:19.180 entered my life,
00:35:20.760 every one of them
00:35:21.660 will remember
00:35:22.440 that they communicated
00:35:23.920 with me,
00:35:24.820 because I'm the Dilbert guy.
00:35:26.420 How many of them
00:35:27.420 will I remember
00:35:28.760 their name
00:35:29.580 if I saw it again
00:35:30.520 and they say,
00:35:31.040 hey, do you remember
00:35:31.600 we talked?
00:35:33.400 None.
00:35:34.960 Probably none.
00:35:36.080 I might remember
00:35:37.160 the topic,
00:35:38.280 but I'm not going to remember
00:35:39.380 even one of their names.
00:35:41.160 So,
00:35:41.900 what are the odds
00:35:43.180 that Devin Nunes
00:35:44.200 is telling the truth
00:35:45.560 that it was just
00:35:47.380 one of many phone calls
00:35:48.600 and he doesn't remember it?
00:35:49.620 I'd say
00:35:50.080 close to 100%.
00:35:52.060 Right?
00:35:53.520 You can't read minds,
00:35:54.780 you never know,
00:35:55.560 you could be wrong,
00:35:56.760 but that's completely
00:35:58.720 credible.
00:36:00.500 Completely credible.
00:36:01.460 so the people
00:36:02.880 who say
00:36:03.280 that he should have
00:36:03.840 remembered
00:36:04.220 are just inexperienced.
00:36:05.700 They're not
00:36:06.400 just wrong,
00:36:08.660 they're probably
00:36:09.320 just inexperienced.
00:36:10.280 All right,
00:36:13.780 so,
00:36:14.840 let's see
00:36:16.060 what else we got here.
00:36:18.080 Hilariously,
00:36:19.660 on Jeopardy,
00:36:20.740 I think it was
00:36:21.580 yesterday,
00:36:23.120 one of the questions
00:36:24.200 was about Adam Schiff.
00:36:26.440 So Adam Schiff
00:36:27.320 was the answer
00:36:28.220 to a Jeopardy question
00:36:29.440 and none of the contestants
00:36:31.280 knew who he was.
00:36:34.980 So,
00:36:35.980 if you ever wondered,
00:36:38.100 hey,
00:36:38.400 is the rest of the country
00:36:39.760 paying attention
00:36:40.580 like we are?
00:36:42.120 Because most of you
00:36:42.900 are probably
00:36:43.440 political junkies
00:36:44.540 if you're watching
00:36:45.540 this periscope.
00:36:47.100 And it's easy to forget
00:36:48.520 the rest of the country
00:36:49.360 isn't paying attention
00:36:50.260 to any of this.
00:36:52.100 None of it.
00:36:53.260 Three very smart people
00:36:55.040 on Jeopardy
00:36:55.620 didn't even know
00:36:56.180 who this guy was
00:36:57.060 when they saw
00:36:57.720 a picture of him.
00:36:59.480 Now,
00:37:00.200 it's extra funny to me
00:37:01.980 because I've been
00:37:03.860 a Jeopardy answer
00:37:05.020 maybe three or four times.
00:37:07.340 and they always
00:37:08.980 get it right.
00:37:11.060 So,
00:37:11.740 when the Jeopardy
00:37:13.080 question slash
00:37:14.460 answer is about
00:37:15.360 me personally,
00:37:16.980 I think at least
00:37:17.780 one of the contestants
00:37:18.640 has gotten it right
00:37:19.520 every time.
00:37:20.860 Sometimes it's about
00:37:21.800 the Dilbert comic,
00:37:22.740 sometimes it's about me.
00:37:25.000 So,
00:37:25.640 I think I'm
00:37:26.180 three to one
00:37:26.920 advantage
00:37:27.760 over Adam Schiff
00:37:29.100 on the
00:37:29.620 all-important
00:37:30.780 Jeopardy
00:37:31.820 scale.
00:37:34.000 so there was
00:37:35.740 gigantic news
00:37:37.200 yesterday,
00:37:38.320 I mean,
00:37:38.600 really big news
00:37:39.640 about Trump
00:37:41.900 signing phase one
00:37:43.180 of the China
00:37:44.080 trade deal.
00:37:45.020 I mean,
00:37:45.340 that's big,
00:37:46.380 big news.
00:37:47.640 So,
00:37:47.980 I went to read
00:37:48.600 about it
00:37:49.100 on the CNN
00:37:51.200 website,
00:37:51.980 but
00:37:54.400 it didn't have
00:37:56.960 anything.
00:37:58.400 It's the biggest
00:37:59.300 news.
00:38:00.200 And I looked at
00:38:00.660 the CNN
00:38:01.120 website,
00:38:02.260 and I'm like,
00:38:02.580 all right,
00:38:03.240 let's see what
00:38:03.780 CNN says about
00:38:04.760 the China
00:38:05.300 trade deal.
00:38:07.220 Crickets.
00:38:07.700 there was one
00:38:09.360 tiny little
00:38:09.940 article over
00:38:11.240 on the
00:38:11.740 non-emphasized
00:38:13.060 part of the
00:38:13.500 page about
00:38:14.880 something bizarre
00:38:15.900 that happened
00:38:16.560 during the
00:38:17.280 signing.
00:38:18.140 There was
00:38:18.300 something weird
00:38:18.840 that happened.
00:38:19.480 I think it was
00:38:19.920 just because
00:38:20.520 Trump talked
00:38:22.460 about impeachment
00:38:23.440 or something,
00:38:23.960 whatever it was.
00:38:25.520 That's it?
00:38:27.860 That's like
00:38:28.520 one of the
00:38:28.900 biggest stories
00:38:29.580 of all time.
00:38:31.600 And it didn't
00:38:32.060 even make the
00:38:32.560 front page of
00:38:33.200 CNN.
00:38:33.500 Gordon
00:38:38.140 Chang,
00:38:39.100 who I
00:38:39.620 quote lots
00:38:40.780 of times,
00:38:41.480 so he's an
00:38:41.900 expert on
00:38:42.520 all things
00:38:43.240 in terms of
00:38:45.760 China and
00:38:46.440 North Korea
00:38:46.920 and other
00:38:47.920 stuff.
00:38:49.580 And basically,
00:38:52.000 oh,
00:38:52.300 this was
00:38:52.780 CNN's
00:38:53.340 headline,
00:38:53.960 the little
00:38:54.820 squib they
00:38:55.480 had,
00:38:56.060 Trump's
00:38:56.540 China trade
00:38:57.640 deal signing
00:38:58.440 takes a
00:38:59.060 surreal turn.
00:39:00.940 That's it.
00:39:01.640 There was
00:39:01.900 something surreal
00:39:02.600 about the
00:39:03.120 signing itself.
00:39:04.980 All right,
00:39:05.180 so Gordon
00:39:05.500 Chang basically
00:39:06.500 said the
00:39:07.080 deal is
00:39:08.340 inadequate.
00:39:09.480 It's a fake
00:39:10.160 deal because
00:39:10.860 China is not
00:39:11.800 going to do
00:39:12.400 anything they
00:39:12.920 say.
00:39:13.960 And that the
00:39:14.500 part about
00:39:15.040 protecting
00:39:15.560 intellectual
00:39:16.200 property is
00:39:17.740 totally fake
00:39:18.940 because they
00:39:20.120 still have the
00:39:21.000 ability to
00:39:21.840 monitor and
00:39:22.960 steal anything
00:39:23.620 in the
00:39:23.920 country.
00:39:24.340 So anything
00:39:24.900 that has an
00:39:25.600 electronic
00:39:26.160 communication to
00:39:28.580 it, they're
00:39:28.960 going to pick
00:39:29.340 up in the
00:39:29.740 country.
00:39:30.720 So it's easy
00:39:31.240 for China to
00:39:31.920 say, oh,
00:39:32.320 yeah, we
00:39:32.760 won't force
00:39:33.440 you to turn
00:39:34.600 over your
00:39:35.000 technology to
00:39:35.840 us.
00:39:36.300 They don't
00:39:36.580 need to.
00:39:37.160 They'll just
00:39:37.520 steal it.
00:39:38.380 So they can
00:39:39.060 actually agree
00:39:39.620 to it because
00:39:40.080 they're not
00:39:40.360 giving anything
00:39:40.880 up.
00:39:41.180 Well, we'll
00:39:41.680 just steal
00:39:42.480 it anyway.
00:39:44.260 So Gordon
00:39:44.820 Chang says
00:39:45.420 it's a fake
00:39:45.920 deal, basically.
00:39:47.300 I shouldn't
00:39:48.580 put words in
00:39:49.140 his mouth, but
00:39:49.840 certainly that
00:39:51.120 it's a deal
00:39:51.580 with some
00:39:52.020 substantial holes
00:39:53.080 in it.
00:39:54.020 Do I think
00:39:54.560 that's true?
00:39:56.220 Yes.
00:39:56.660 Yes, I do.
00:39:58.760 Do you
00:39:59.880 know what's
00:40:00.140 missing and
00:40:00.820 they haven't
00:40:01.160 talked about?
00:40:02.500 Fentanyl.
00:40:04.540 Fentanyl is
00:40:05.240 missing.
00:40:05.940 So I'm not a
00:40:06.780 fan of the
00:40:07.440 China deal
00:40:08.000 because if
00:40:09.720 fentanyl is
00:40:10.440 not the first
00:40:11.140 thing that you
00:40:11.860 deal, you're
00:40:13.160 not dealing
00:40:13.660 with a country
00:40:14.220 you should be
00:40:14.920 doing any
00:40:15.480 business with
00:40:16.060 at all.
00:40:17.220 So we just
00:40:18.860 made a business
00:40:20.160 deal with a
00:40:20.820 country that's
00:40:22.080 knowingly killing
00:40:23.140 tens of thousands
00:40:24.000 of Americans
00:40:24.680 every year.
00:40:26.420 I would call
00:40:27.180 that a
00:40:27.960 gigantic
00:40:29.300 failure.
00:40:31.360 So I'll put
00:40:32.040 that in my
00:40:33.340 portfolio of
00:40:35.500 criticisms of
00:40:37.080 Trump.
00:40:38.040 So when
00:40:38.320 everybody says,
00:40:38.960 hey, you
00:40:39.300 keep agreeing
00:40:39.800 with him all
00:40:40.240 the time, put
00:40:41.160 that in there
00:40:41.660 too.
00:40:42.440 Phase one
00:40:43.100 trade deal I
00:40:43.800 would call a
00:40:44.380 gigantic failure
00:40:45.420 because they
00:40:48.300 shouldn't even
00:40:48.960 be able to
00:40:49.820 negotiate until
00:40:50.880 they shut down
00:40:51.660 the fentanyl
00:40:52.260 dealers.
00:40:52.620 That should
00:40:53.960 be a ticket
00:40:55.620 to the
00:40:56.360 negotiations.
00:40:58.060 If that's
00:40:58.640 in phase
00:40:59.140 two, really
00:41:00.960 phase two,
00:41:02.340 you're going
00:41:02.760 to wait for
00:41:03.180 that or it's
00:41:04.240 not even part
00:41:04.860 of the deal?
00:41:07.900 Somebody said
00:41:08.800 Trump did.
00:41:10.260 Trump talked
00:41:10.940 about it.
00:41:13.120 He mentioned
00:41:14.040 arrests.
00:41:15.460 Well, until
00:41:16.040 the major,
00:41:17.680 I'll wait to
00:41:18.500 see an article
00:41:19.020 on that.
00:41:20.440 So I'm being
00:41:21.000 corrected in the
00:41:21.940 comments.
00:41:22.620 that he did
00:41:23.620 mention it,
00:41:25.120 but I don't
00:41:25.860 see it in the
00:41:26.420 news anywhere,
00:41:27.140 so I'll have
00:41:27.980 to dig a little
00:41:28.580 deeper.
00:41:29.040 It's not in the
00:41:29.440 headlines.
00:41:30.980 He mentioned
00:41:31.480 it at the
00:41:31.860 ceremony,
00:41:33.380 but it doesn't
00:41:34.680 mean that they've
00:41:35.320 actually done
00:41:35.960 it.
00:41:36.680 So here's the
00:41:37.220 thing, and I'll
00:41:38.040 say this a
00:41:38.600 million times
00:41:39.320 until this
00:41:40.000 message is all
00:41:41.020 you can think
00:41:41.540 about on
00:41:42.020 fentanyl.
00:41:42.800 There's one
00:41:43.580 guy in China
00:41:45.540 who's the
00:41:46.500 guy.
00:41:47.400 He's the
00:41:48.020 main fentanyl
00:41:49.040 dealer.
00:41:49.420 There's probably
00:41:49.740 lesser ones,
00:41:50.580 but there's
00:41:51.400 one who
00:41:51.940 our government,
00:41:54.560 we have his
00:41:55.400 picture, we
00:41:56.000 have his
00:41:56.320 name, and
00:41:57.260 60 minutes
00:41:58.020 actually found
00:41:58.900 him and
00:41:59.260 talked to
00:41:59.640 him.
00:42:00.040 He's not
00:42:00.400 even hard to
00:42:00.960 find.
00:42:01.780 He's a public
00:42:02.540 figure.
00:42:03.580 We know his
00:42:04.160 name, we
00:42:05.560 know his
00:42:05.880 picture, and
00:42:06.880 we told China,
00:42:08.200 this is the
00:42:08.960 guy.
00:42:09.580 If you don't
00:42:10.300 hear that guy's
00:42:11.340 in jail or
00:42:12.280 executed, they're
00:42:13.520 not trying.
00:42:14.900 So anything
00:42:15.340 else they do
00:42:15.960 was just
00:42:16.260 BS.
00:42:18.360 All right.
00:42:21.700 So call
00:42:22.760 me a
00:42:23.320 giant skeptic
00:42:24.440 on the
00:42:24.980 China deal.
00:42:27.760 I say
00:42:28.540 decouple.
00:42:30.380 Let's
00:42:30.860 decouple.
00:42:32.340 All right.
00:42:33.940 Let's see
00:42:34.480 what else we
00:42:34.920 got going
00:42:35.300 on here.
00:42:41.020 Yeah, so
00:42:41.740 somebody's
00:42:42.160 saying in
00:42:42.500 the comments,
00:42:43.560 the number
00:42:43.960 one guy
00:42:44.460 needs to
00:42:44.880 be dealt
00:42:45.880 with.
00:42:47.320 I had one
00:42:48.260 critic today
00:42:49.160 on Twitter,
00:42:50.440 which is
00:42:50.940 strange.
00:42:51.620 Usually there
00:42:52.160 are more.
00:42:53.420 And he
00:42:54.200 tweeted back
00:42:54.860 to me that
00:42:56.980 I'm a
00:42:57.400 dishonest
00:42:58.040 clown.
00:42:59.260 I'm a
00:42:59.860 dishonest
00:43:00.380 clown.
00:43:02.140 So I
00:43:02.900 tweeted back
00:43:03.500 to him,
00:43:04.360 how long
00:43:05.100 have you
00:43:05.380 been involved
00:43:05.980 in the
00:43:06.380 arts?
00:43:07.820 If you're
00:43:08.520 new to
00:43:08.780 this, you
00:43:09.280 know that
00:43:09.620 I mock
00:43:10.520 people for
00:43:11.880 being artists
00:43:12.840 because artists
00:43:14.260 do not
00:43:14.880 have a
00:43:15.180 good view
00:43:15.600 of the
00:43:15.860 world.
00:43:17.260 Had he
00:43:17.880 been an
00:43:18.620 economist,
00:43:19.520 probably would
00:43:20.680 have given
00:43:20.980 me some
00:43:21.360 reasons for
00:43:21.940 disagreeing.
00:43:23.180 So I
00:43:23.480 said to
00:43:23.800 him,
00:43:24.900 Michael
00:43:25.700 Grant,
00:43:26.340 who called
00:43:26.940 me a
00:43:27.220 dishonest
00:43:27.680 clown,
00:43:28.100 I said,
00:43:28.680 how long
00:43:29.340 have you
00:43:29.580 been involved
00:43:30.140 in the
00:43:30.460 arts?
00:43:31.860 And he
00:43:32.180 responded
00:43:32.620 back,
00:43:33.780 he's written
00:43:34.260 150 books
00:43:35.600 over 40
00:43:36.340 years.
00:43:37.800 And so I
00:43:38.580 said,
00:43:39.220 good for
00:43:39.740 you.
00:43:40.620 Very
00:43:40.920 productive.
00:43:42.600 I no
00:43:43.380 longer want
00:43:44.160 to get
00:43:44.480 into debates
00:43:45.160 with artists.
00:43:48.200 I'm just
00:43:48.880 going to
00:43:49.280 note their
00:43:49.780 artists and
00:43:50.420 then move
00:43:50.800 on.
00:43:51.600 If you
00:43:52.080 haven't tried
00:43:52.740 this, you
00:43:53.240 really need
00:43:53.780 to.
00:43:55.220 Because
00:43:55.700 somebody says
00:43:56.900 you're an
00:43:57.260 artist.
00:43:57.700 Let me
00:43:57.900 give some
00:43:58.220 context.
00:44:00.620 Thank you
00:44:01.220 for asking.
00:44:03.420 First of
00:44:04.060 all, I'm
00:44:04.460 not much
00:44:04.820 of an
00:44:05.060 artist, but
00:44:05.640 it is true
00:44:06.120 that I
00:44:06.480 write and
00:44:07.100 I draw
00:44:07.520 for a
00:44:08.000 living.
00:44:08.160 In my
00:44:09.560 book,
00:44:09.880 Loser
00:44:10.140 Think,
00:44:10.760 which I'm
00:44:11.260 sure all
00:44:11.820 of you
00:44:12.100 have ordered
00:44:12.680 by now,
00:44:13.420 if you
00:44:13.700 haven't already
00:44:14.240 read it,
00:44:15.140 I talk about
00:44:15.800 how having
00:44:17.020 exposure to
00:44:17.760 multiple fields
00:44:18.540 gives you
00:44:18.980 more windows
00:44:19.620 into every
00:44:20.340 topic.
00:44:21.340 So I'm
00:44:21.840 an artist,
00:44:22.360 but I'm
00:44:22.560 also, I've
00:44:24.020 got a degree
00:44:24.460 in economics,
00:44:25.460 I've got an
00:44:25.980 MBA in
00:44:26.520 business, and
00:44:27.720 I've worked
00:44:28.240 in corporate
00:44:28.920 areas and
00:44:29.740 everything from
00:44:30.340 marketing to
00:44:31.120 strategy to
00:44:32.040 you name it.
00:44:33.700 So in my
00:44:34.460 particular case,
00:44:35.880 art is my
00:44:36.660 job, but
00:44:37.380 my
00:44:37.740 actual
00:44:38.500 experience is
00:44:39.740 much broader
00:44:40.720 than that.
00:44:43.640 Yes, that is
00:44:44.400 what I wrote
00:44:44.840 in my book.
00:44:47.560 It's called
00:44:48.280 Loser Think.
00:44:50.300 I'll put it
00:44:50.760 back here so
00:44:51.280 you can't help
00:44:52.380 but look at
00:44:52.800 it.
00:44:54.260 All right,
00:44:55.480 what else
00:44:57.440 we got here?
00:44:58.220 We got,
00:45:01.520 so,
00:45:01.820 do you know
00:45:03.180 the musical,
00:45:05.360 what do you
00:45:06.260 call him,
00:45:06.520 musical artist
00:45:07.260 Akon,
00:45:08.100 A-K-O-N,
00:45:09.840 those of you
00:45:10.400 who are not
00:45:10.860 up on your
00:45:11.480 music?
00:45:12.680 He's one of the
00:45:13.300 most successful
00:45:14.000 artists in the
00:45:15.640 world, and I
00:45:18.200 think he came
00:45:18.740 from Senegal,
00:45:19.780 or that's where
00:45:21.380 his family roots
00:45:22.120 are, I can't
00:45:22.720 remember, in
00:45:23.360 Africa, but he's
00:45:24.700 building his own
00:45:25.380 city there.
00:45:26.940 So Akon
00:45:27.620 decided to
00:45:28.320 build his own
00:45:28.960 city in Senegal,
00:45:30.500 and they're
00:45:31.240 going to have
00:45:31.540 their own
00:45:31.940 cryptocurrency,
00:45:33.980 and I love
00:45:35.740 this.
00:45:37.500 I absolutely
00:45:38.720 love this.
00:45:39.940 Now, I'm not
00:45:41.020 going to say
00:45:41.360 that Akon is
00:45:42.260 going to build
00:45:42.820 the best city.
00:45:44.500 What I love
00:45:45.200 is that he's
00:45:45.600 trying, and he
00:45:47.360 even says the
00:45:47.980 same thing,
00:45:48.420 what's the point
00:45:48.900 of having a
00:45:49.420 billion dollars
00:45:50.040 if you're not
00:45:50.640 going to go
00:45:50.960 fix stuff?
00:45:52.900 I'm a big
00:45:53.660 fan, right?
00:45:55.240 I mean, I
00:45:56.140 was a fan of
00:45:56.720 his music, but
00:45:58.360 when you see
00:45:59.080 an artist of
00:46:00.120 this stature
00:46:00.740 say, what's
00:46:02.180 the point of
00:46:02.600 having a
00:46:02.980 billion dollars
00:46:03.600 if you're not
00:46:04.200 trying to fix
00:46:05.360 the world, and
00:46:06.360 then he goes
00:46:06.820 out and he
00:46:07.160 tries to build
00:46:07.740 a city in
00:46:08.480 Senegal, I
00:46:09.700 don't even
00:46:10.120 care if it
00:46:10.640 works.
00:46:12.040 I love what
00:46:13.460 this guy's
00:46:14.000 doing for the
00:46:15.480 world, for the
00:46:16.320 way we think,
00:46:17.800 you know, the
00:46:18.060 way we, I
00:46:20.020 just love that
00:46:20.540 he's A-B
00:46:20.980 testing.
00:46:21.840 I'm sure he
00:46:22.460 wants this to
00:46:23.040 be the thing
00:46:23.520 that works, but
00:46:24.860 whether it
00:46:25.280 works or
00:46:25.640 not, we're
00:46:26.000 going to
00:46:26.160 learn something,
00:46:27.120 and maybe
00:46:27.460 the city
00:46:28.180 after that
00:46:28.860 or the city
00:46:29.380 after that
00:46:29.880 is a good
00:46:30.480 one, but
00:46:31.500 good going,
00:46:32.640 Akon.
00:46:33.280 I like to
00:46:33.860 think that
00:46:34.420 in some
00:46:35.500 ways I
00:46:36.600 would be
00:46:36.880 surprised if
00:46:38.940 Kanye is
00:46:39.940 not somehow
00:46:40.760 an influence
00:46:41.520 on this,
00:46:42.420 directly or
00:46:43.140 indirectly,
00:46:43.680 because, you
00:46:43.920 know, Kanye
00:46:44.340 is trying also
00:46:45.940 separately to
00:46:46.720 design and
00:46:47.380 build lower
00:46:48.880 cost structures
00:46:51.220 for people
00:46:51.840 to live
00:46:52.140 in, which
00:46:54.240 is good
00:46:54.560 stuff.
00:46:56.040 All right.
00:47:00.120 I told
00:47:01.180 you one of
00:47:02.620 the tricks
00:47:03.060 that CNN
00:47:03.740 uses with
00:47:04.540 its opinion
00:47:05.040 pieces is
00:47:06.320 that they
00:47:06.800 will make a
00:47:08.620 claim about
00:47:09.340 usually Trump,
00:47:10.320 how bad he
00:47:10.840 is, and
00:47:11.760 then you'll
00:47:12.660 have to read
00:47:13.240 way, way,
00:47:13.860 way down the
00:47:14.340 article to
00:47:15.540 see why they
00:47:16.200 say it.
00:47:17.660 So why are
00:47:18.840 you saying
00:47:19.120 that?
00:47:19.340 And there's
00:47:20.120 just this
00:47:20.520 best example,
00:47:22.600 one of their
00:47:23.420 usual pundits
00:47:25.260 who just
00:47:25.640 writes an
00:47:26.040 anti-Trump
00:47:26.580 piece every
00:47:27.060 day for
00:47:27.400 their website.
00:47:30.940 This is how
00:47:32.080 he starts
00:47:32.620 it.
00:47:33.300 Sorry, this
00:47:33.800 is on
00:47:34.080 CNN.com.
00:47:35.420 President
00:47:35.740 Trump is
00:47:36.760 not waiting
00:47:37.300 to be
00:47:37.660 acquitted
00:47:38.160 of impeachable
00:47:39.500 crimes.
00:47:40.920 So first
00:47:41.440 of all, he
00:47:41.920 says that
00:47:43.480 the crimes
00:47:44.000 are impeachable.
00:47:45.760 That's not
00:47:46.500 true.
00:47:47.400 So the
00:47:47.720 very first
00:47:48.380 sentence,
00:47:49.340 tries to
00:47:50.140 get you
00:47:50.500 to
00:47:50.740 uncritically
00:47:51.500 accept
00:47:52.040 that these
00:47:53.420 are
00:47:53.580 impeachable
00:47:54.060 crimes.
00:47:56.160 Well, he
00:47:57.120 was impeached,
00:47:57.920 but they're
00:47:58.440 not really
00:47:59.000 impeachable
00:47:59.500 crimes,
00:48:00.180 because we're
00:48:00.600 going to
00:48:00.780 find out
00:48:01.260 that the
00:48:01.780 Senate is
00:48:02.280 going to
00:48:02.480 throw it
00:48:02.800 out.
00:48:03.760 So I
00:48:04.900 suppose maybe
00:48:05.580 technically it's
00:48:06.640 true, but
00:48:07.540 they're not
00:48:07.900 crimes.
00:48:09.280 There's no
00:48:09.980 crimes involved,
00:48:10.960 or even
00:48:11.340 alleged.
00:48:12.780 So a
00:48:13.880 CNN,
00:48:14.760 a news
00:48:15.320 site,
00:48:16.280 very first
00:48:16.960 sentence,
00:48:17.380 accuses
00:48:18.920 Donald
00:48:19.220 Trump of
00:48:19.720 having
00:48:20.020 impeachable
00:48:20.680 crimes,
00:48:21.800 and yet
00:48:22.340 their own
00:48:23.180 reporting
00:48:23.700 has never
00:48:24.860 suggested a
00:48:25.620 crime,
00:48:26.420 at least in
00:48:27.520 terms of
00:48:27.900 what's
00:48:28.180 impeachable
00:48:28.820 and what's
00:48:29.340 on the
00:48:30.120 impeachable
00:48:31.320 list.
00:48:33.260 And then
00:48:33.920 it goes on,
00:48:34.460 to show
00:48:34.760 that no one
00:48:35.340 can stop
00:48:35.920 him doing
00:48:36.920 what he
00:48:37.260 wants to
00:48:37.700 do.
00:48:39.260 What?
00:48:40.280 That's what
00:48:40.960 Trump is
00:48:41.340 doing?
00:48:41.680 He's trying
00:48:42.060 to show
00:48:42.780 the world
00:48:44.320 that no
00:48:45.060 one can
00:48:45.460 stop him?
00:48:47.340 Is that
00:48:48.920 mind reading?
00:48:50.120 Where do
00:48:50.500 you get
00:48:50.720 that?
00:48:51.540 What factual
00:48:52.320 basis do
00:48:52.980 you have
00:48:53.380 that Trump
00:48:54.780 is,
00:48:55.400 quote,
00:48:56.200 trying to
00:48:56.800 show that
00:48:57.380 no one
00:48:57.680 can stop
00:48:58.180 him doing
00:48:58.540 what he
00:48:58.880 wants to
00:48:59.320 do?
00:49:00.200 That's not
00:49:00.680 an evidence.
00:49:01.760 There's no
00:49:02.260 evidence of
00:49:02.800 that at
00:49:03.820 all.
00:49:04.500 And he
00:49:04.920 doesn't even
00:49:05.320 offer an
00:49:05.720 argument.
00:49:06.200 He just
00:49:06.520 says it
00:49:07.080 like it's
00:49:07.400 a fact.
00:49:11.000 Then he
00:49:11.600 says no
00:49:13.400 constitution,
00:49:14.360 democratic
00:49:14.800 house,
00:49:15.760 code of
00:49:16.220 accepted
00:49:16.680 presidential
00:49:17.320 behavior,
00:49:17.980 foreign
00:49:18.140 Islamic
00:49:18.600 is going
00:49:22.700 to rein
00:49:23.180 him in.
00:49:23.780 So basically
00:49:24.240 he's saying
00:49:24.620 nothing's
00:49:25.440 going to
00:49:25.640 rein him
00:49:25.960 in.
00:49:26.200 So the
00:49:26.700 tenor of
00:49:27.300 this is
00:49:27.720 that he's
00:49:28.060 going to
00:49:28.260 become a
00:49:28.680 dictator
00:49:29.080 because he's
00:49:31.200 going to
00:49:31.400 get away
00:49:31.740 with this
00:49:32.240 impeachable
00:49:33.120 stuff that
00:49:34.220 doesn't
00:49:34.540 exist.
00:49:35.960 And then
00:49:36.340 way down
00:49:36.820 the article
00:49:37.360 I'm waiting
00:49:38.340 for the
00:49:38.780 actual reasons
00:49:39.500 because so
00:49:39.940 far it's
00:49:40.400 just a
00:49:40.700 bunch of
00:49:41.060 insults,
00:49:41.600 and
00:49:41.780 accusations
00:49:42.360 that don't
00:49:43.340 match the
00:49:43.820 facts.
00:49:44.800 But way
00:49:45.320 down I'm
00:49:46.760 waiting for
00:49:47.360 well there
00:49:48.240 must be
00:49:48.560 some reasons.
00:49:50.740 So let's
00:49:51.180 get to the
00:49:51.600 reasons.
00:49:52.640 So after
00:49:53.000 an entire
00:49:53.500 page of
00:49:54.120 insults and
00:49:56.000 libelous
00:49:57.780 claims such
00:49:59.620 as crimes
00:50:00.380 here's his
00:50:03.040 reason.
00:50:03.500 A week
00:50:03.800 after a
00:50:04.300 showdown
00:50:04.700 with Iran
00:50:05.280 nearly erupted
00:50:06.000 into a new
00:50:06.600 war the
00:50:08.060 administration
00:50:08.600 is still
00:50:09.260 defying
00:50:09.820 congressional
00:50:10.420 demands for
00:50:11.180 more information
00:50:11.960 about the
00:50:12.500 rationale for
00:50:14.020 killing
00:50:14.540 Tehran's
00:50:16.500 top general.
00:50:18.400 Now this
00:50:20.020 entire story
00:50:21.120 is based on
00:50:22.660 CNN and
00:50:23.380 other people
00:50:24.020 misquoting the
00:50:26.360 president.
00:50:28.180 So when you
00:50:29.300 finally get to
00:50:29.920 a reason it's
00:50:31.040 not even a
00:50:31.600 real one.
00:50:32.120 It's based on
00:50:32.760 a misquote
00:50:33.300 because what
00:50:33.800 the president
00:50:34.280 said was
00:50:35.400 that he
00:50:35.780 believes four
00:50:37.860 embassies would
00:50:39.120 have been
00:50:39.360 targeted.
00:50:41.280 They changed
00:50:41.880 that into
00:50:42.460 he claimed
00:50:45.060 he saw
00:50:45.580 intel that
00:50:48.080 four specific
00:50:48.980 embassies were
00:50:49.720 being targeted.
00:50:50.840 He never
00:50:51.120 said that.
00:50:52.200 He stated
00:50:52.760 his belief
00:50:53.440 that four
00:50:54.500 embassies would
00:50:55.160 be targeted.
00:50:56.840 He's right,
00:50:57.540 he's wrong,
00:50:58.120 it doesn't
00:50:58.400 matter, it
00:50:58.860 was a
00:50:59.120 belief.
00:51:00.980 CNN turned
00:51:01.760 it into a
00:51:02.300 statement of
00:51:02.780 fact,
00:51:03.160 fact-checked
00:51:04.000 it, turned
00:51:04.560 it into a
00:51:05.760 statement that
00:51:06.400 he was lying,
00:51:07.200 and then
00:51:07.840 turned it
00:51:08.240 into more
00:51:09.940 of an
00:51:10.200 argument that
00:51:11.560 nothing will
00:51:12.120 stop him and
00:51:12.820 he's going to
00:51:13.200 only do
00:51:13.700 undemocratic
00:51:14.540 things before
00:51:15.840 he becomes a
00:51:16.580 second-term
00:51:17.080 dictator.
00:51:18.780 This is so
00:51:19.880 far from
00:51:22.540 reasonable
00:51:24.960 discourse.
00:51:27.520 Rolling
00:51:28.120 Stone had
00:51:31.040 an article
00:51:31.440 by Matt
00:51:31.980 Taibbi,
00:51:33.280 who, what
00:51:33.740 did he
00:51:34.040 call, I
00:51:35.840 want to say
00:51:36.140 exactly what
00:51:36.820 he called
00:51:37.420 CNN, I
00:51:42.560 forgot to
00:51:42.960 write down
00:51:43.260 his quote,
00:51:43.960 but the, so
00:51:45.800 Matt Taibbi
00:51:46.400 just went
00:51:47.000 after CNN,
00:51:47.780 especially for
00:51:48.440 that part
00:51:48.920 where Abby
00:51:50.220 Phillip treated
00:51:52.280 the difference,
00:51:53.440 the disagreement
00:51:54.760 between Warren
00:51:55.760 and Bernie as
00:51:58.480 being Warren,
00:52:00.100 Warren is
00:52:00.760 true, because
00:52:02.400 it must be
00:52:03.660 true what
00:52:04.200 Warren is
00:52:04.700 saying,
00:52:04.980 because CNN
00:52:06.860 has reported
00:52:07.680 it as
00:52:08.140 fact.
00:52:09.500 Now, as
00:52:10.160 smart people
00:52:10.780 have pointed
00:52:11.280 out, a
00:52:12.060 number of
00:52:12.460 them, you've
00:52:13.160 seen a bunch
00:52:13.580 of people say
00:52:14.080 this, the
00:52:15.100 reason that
00:52:15.760 CNN reported
00:52:16.700 it as a
00:52:17.280 fact, well,
00:52:19.100 it had to
00:52:19.540 be one of
00:52:21.200 two people
00:52:21.720 told them,
00:52:22.240 because there
00:52:22.540 were only two
00:52:23.060 people in the
00:52:23.640 room, Bernie
00:52:24.900 or Elizabeth
00:52:26.220 Warren, and
00:52:29.080 then she
00:52:29.380 said, and
00:52:30.400 then, and
00:52:32.060 then I
00:52:32.400 think it was
00:52:32.720 Abby Phillips
00:52:33.200 said that
00:52:33.820 Elizabeth Warren
00:52:34.860 confirmed what
00:52:36.800 CNN reported.
00:52:38.940 No, obviously
00:52:41.640 Elizabeth Warren
00:52:42.740 or her people
00:52:43.740 are the people
00:52:44.800 who told CNN
00:52:45.660 in the first
00:52:46.320 place.
00:52:47.580 If Warren
00:52:48.860 confirmed it,
00:52:50.260 there's no
00:52:51.000 confirmation, it's
00:52:51.940 still the same
00:52:52.540 source.
00:52:52.980 it's one
00:52:53.980 source said
00:52:55.760 something that
00:52:56.380 the other
00:52:56.720 source says
00:52:57.860 didn't happen.
00:52:58.520 That's it.
00:53:00.060 So for CNN
00:53:01.220 to treat it
00:53:01.860 like it's a
00:53:02.620 fact because
00:53:03.980 they got it
00:53:04.780 from Warren
00:53:05.340 and then
00:53:06.300 Warren said
00:53:06.780 it was true
00:53:07.360 so it was
00:53:07.900 confirmed,
00:53:08.920 they turned
00:53:09.380 one fact
00:53:10.020 into two
00:53:10.540 facts right
00:53:12.380 in front of
00:53:12.800 you.
00:53:13.920 They're not
00:53:14.620 even trying
00:53:15.060 to hide it.
00:53:17.420 So as
00:53:18.660 Tucker Carlson
00:53:19.640 pointed out
00:53:20.360 and Matt
00:53:21.100 Taibbi
00:53:21.480 pointed out
00:53:22.040 in Rolling
00:53:22.440 Stones,
00:53:22.980 Stone,
00:53:25.740 CNN has
00:53:26.720 just stopped
00:53:27.600 any pretense
00:53:30.000 of not being
00:53:30.900 a political
00:53:31.540 player.
00:53:33.320 Any thought
00:53:33.980 of being a
00:53:34.740 news organization
00:53:35.580 is sort
00:53:36.340 of out
00:53:36.820 the door.
00:53:38.660 And it's
00:53:40.540 amazing to
00:53:41.160 watch because
00:53:41.800 as I said
00:53:42.300 before,
00:53:43.440 the doomers
00:53:44.160 still think
00:53:45.180 it's news.
00:53:46.420 The doomers
00:53:47.400 watch MSNBC
00:53:48.560 and they
00:53:49.120 watch CNN
00:53:50.240 and they
00:53:50.760 actually think
00:53:51.460 they're watching
00:53:51.920 the news.
00:53:52.980 They're not.
00:53:54.240 It's not
00:53:54.820 the news
00:53:55.180 anymore.
00:53:56.200 That's
00:53:56.560 what it
00:53:57.700 used to
00:53:58.020 be.
00:54:01.640 I would
00:54:02.280 like to
00:54:02.660 close by
00:54:03.720 saying,
00:54:04.700 have you
00:54:05.120 ever tried
00:54:05.520 to mail
00:54:05.980 a letter
00:54:06.460 recently?
00:54:07.120 so yesterday
00:54:10.380 I had these
00:54:11.900 W-2s
00:54:12.740 that come to
00:54:13.200 me.
00:54:13.480 They come
00:54:13.780 in these
00:54:14.080 envelopes
00:54:14.800 this size
00:54:15.240 and I
00:54:16.600 needed to
00:54:17.040 mail them
00:54:17.460 out to
00:54:17.960 my couple
00:54:19.700 assistants.
00:54:21.160 And I
00:54:23.060 thought to
00:54:23.380 myself,
00:54:24.200 how do you
00:54:25.140 mail things?
00:54:26.420 It's been so
00:54:27.120 long since I
00:54:27.980 put a stamp
00:54:29.160 on an envelope
00:54:30.420 and mailed it
00:54:31.340 that I was
00:54:32.300 having a little
00:54:32.780 trouble remembering
00:54:33.620 how to do it.
00:54:34.360 So the
00:54:35.200 first thing I
00:54:35.760 needed to do
00:54:36.380 is get these
00:54:37.160 things called
00:54:37.820 stamps.
00:54:39.520 And I
00:54:40.360 thought I had
00:54:41.040 some in a
00:54:41.760 drawer.
00:54:42.820 You know,
00:54:43.020 there's a little
00:54:43.540 junk drawer in
00:54:44.660 my kitchen.
00:54:46.940 And I was
00:54:47.380 sure I saw some
00:54:48.200 stamps in there
00:54:48.900 some time ago.
00:54:50.400 So I looked
00:54:51.340 through the
00:54:51.660 drawer and I
00:54:52.500 looked again
00:54:53.060 because I knew
00:54:53.580 there were stamps
00:54:54.160 and I couldn't
00:54:54.640 find them.
00:54:55.600 So I looked
00:54:55.980 again and then
00:54:56.960 I really looked.
00:54:58.160 I took each
00:54:58.840 item out and
00:54:59.680 really looked and
00:55:01.100 the stamps were
00:55:01.740 not in the
00:55:02.160 drawer.
00:55:03.160 Now all of the
00:55:03.960 men watching this
00:55:04.840 know what
00:55:05.260 happened next.
00:55:06.620 I don't even
00:55:07.100 have to say the
00:55:07.680 next part, do I?
00:55:09.040 So finally, after
00:55:10.200 several times of
00:55:11.420 looking through this
00:55:12.040 one drawer, I
00:55:12.720 didn't look
00:55:13.020 anywhere else
00:55:13.980 because I knew
00:55:14.480 it was in the
00:55:14.980 drawer.
00:55:15.900 Looked and
00:55:16.400 looked, couldn't
00:55:16.880 find it.
00:55:17.740 I went to
00:55:18.300 Christina and
00:55:19.080 I said,
00:55:19.700 can you help
00:55:20.900 me find the
00:55:21.420 stamps?
00:55:23.040 I think they're
00:55:23.720 in this drawer
00:55:24.280 but I can't
00:55:25.620 find them.
00:55:26.860 So she said
00:55:27.640 sure, but I
00:55:29.520 think we said
00:55:30.040 it when I was
00:55:30.700 in the car and
00:55:31.700 we didn't write
00:55:32.220 it down to
00:55:32.880 remind ourselves
00:55:33.620 and forgot.
00:55:35.100 And I thought
00:55:35.660 about it again
00:55:36.300 but she was
00:55:36.840 busy.
00:55:37.400 I thought about
00:55:37.900 it again but
00:55:38.480 she was out of
00:55:38.960 the house.
00:55:39.440 I thought about
00:55:39.940 it again but
00:55:40.620 I was busy.
00:55:41.900 It took me
00:55:42.680 one week to
00:55:46.120 find a time
00:55:46.880 when Christina
00:55:48.160 and I were
00:55:48.680 both available
00:55:49.380 at the same
00:55:49.860 time and
00:55:50.600 in my
00:55:51.000 kitchen so
00:55:52.360 that she
00:55:52.640 could open
00:55:53.060 the drawer
00:55:53.540 and do
00:55:55.340 this.
00:55:56.700 Here you
00:55:57.280 go.
00:55:58.500 Here are
00:55:59.000 your stamps
00:55:59.500 that are
00:56:00.640 right here.
00:56:02.320 Here you
00:56:02.680 go.
00:56:04.180 Now you
00:56:04.760 already knew
00:56:05.180 that's what
00:56:05.580 was going to
00:56:05.940 happen, right?
00:56:06.480 It's a basic
00:56:07.340 male-female
00:56:08.020 difference.
00:56:08.900 When I look
00:56:09.400 in the drawer
00:56:09.880 I just see
00:56:10.560 noise and
00:56:12.780 it's really
00:56:13.180 hard for me
00:56:13.700 to pick out
00:56:14.160 an item.
00:56:14.520 when she
00:56:15.900 looks in
00:56:16.260 the drawer
00:56:16.600 she sees
00:56:17.080 all the
00:56:17.400 items.
00:56:18.920 I don't
00:56:19.520 know how.
00:56:20.140 It's just
00:56:20.400 some kind
00:56:20.680 of male-female
00:56:21.240 difference I
00:56:21.880 guess.
00:56:22.600 She sees
00:56:23.140 them all.
00:56:23.860 So she
00:56:24.140 says,
00:56:24.460 here's your
00:56:25.140 stamps.
00:56:26.680 I spent
00:56:27.480 probably 30
00:56:28.400 minutes total
00:56:29.160 on different
00:56:30.540 occasions looking
00:56:31.340 through that
00:56:31.760 drawer without
00:56:32.380 finding those
00:56:32.940 stamps.
00:56:33.580 So now I've
00:56:34.040 got my
00:56:34.360 stamps and I
00:56:35.460 thought to
00:56:35.720 myself,
00:56:36.520 how do you
00:56:37.140 know how
00:56:37.560 many stamps
00:56:38.520 to put on a
00:56:39.200 letter?
00:56:40.120 Because it's
00:56:40.740 not a regular
00:56:41.780 sized letter.
00:56:43.720 So I've
00:56:44.880 got to go to
00:56:45.240 the website
00:56:45.860 for the
00:56:46.500 USPS.com
00:56:48.060 and I'm
00:56:49.380 looking for
00:56:49.780 the information
00:56:50.400 on how
00:56:51.700 much postage
00:56:52.640 to put on
00:56:53.160 it.
00:56:54.620 And luckily
00:56:55.080 I've got a
00:56:55.980 postal scale
00:56:56.800 behind me.
00:56:58.020 So I take
00:56:58.460 out my
00:56:58.780 postal scale,
00:56:59.920 I go to
00:57:00.280 the website
00:57:00.660 and there's
00:57:01.500 no example
00:57:02.080 of this
00:57:02.780 envelope.
00:57:04.360 You know,
00:57:04.880 you had to
00:57:05.480 sort of guess,
00:57:06.960 well,
00:57:07.660 it might be
00:57:08.080 sort of this
00:57:08.900 thing or
00:57:09.440 that thing
00:57:10.040 but not
00:57:10.820 really a
00:57:11.260 direct answer.
00:57:12.300 So I'm
00:57:12.560 sort of
00:57:12.840 guessing.
00:57:14.340 So then I
00:57:15.020 use my
00:57:15.400 scale and
00:57:16.940 the battery's
00:57:17.520 dead.
00:57:18.260 So now I've
00:57:18.840 got to go
00:57:19.140 find a
00:57:19.540 battery to
00:57:20.900 put in my
00:57:21.360 scale so
00:57:22.920 I can weigh
00:57:23.380 my envelope,
00:57:24.860 so I can
00:57:25.260 look on the
00:57:25.680 website,
00:57:26.900 figure out
00:57:27.300 what the
00:57:27.580 postage is,
00:57:29.000 get my
00:57:29.440 stamps,
00:57:30.220 put it on
00:57:30.600 the letter.
00:57:32.560 Now,
00:57:34.420 I finally
00:57:35.180 figure out
00:57:35.760 roughly what
00:57:36.760 the postage
00:57:37.300 would be but
00:57:37.920 I figure I'll
00:57:38.460 double it
00:57:38.920 because I
00:57:39.220 don't want
00:57:39.520 to go
00:57:39.800 light.
00:57:40.640 So I
00:57:40.920 take my
00:57:41.300 stamps and
00:57:42.440 they're
00:57:42.600 these
00:57:42.860 forever
00:57:43.220 stamps and
00:57:44.740 I look at
00:57:45.200 them and
00:57:45.420 I go,
00:57:46.640 uh,
00:57:47.560 what's a
00:57:49.000 forever
00:57:49.400 stamp?
00:57:50.580 I mean,
00:57:50.860 I think I
00:57:51.700 know,
00:57:52.440 but I'm
00:57:52.920 not positive
00:57:53.960 I know.
00:57:55.360 Does a
00:57:55.760 forever
00:57:56.040 stamp work
00:57:56.860 for any
00:57:58.200 kind of
00:57:58.540 envelope?
00:57:59.600 Is it a
00:58:00.480 specific value
00:58:01.420 or does it
00:58:02.160 say that
00:58:03.420 anything that's
00:58:04.160 this kind of
00:58:04.680 envelope will
00:58:05.560 always be
00:58:06.200 this?
00:58:06.940 So I
00:58:07.300 have to
00:58:07.540 Google
00:58:07.940 what's a
00:58:09.500 forever
00:58:09.800 stamp?
00:58:11.320 But I
00:58:11.820 don't have
00:58:12.100 enough
00:58:12.340 forever
00:58:12.640 stamps.
00:58:13.140 I've got
00:58:13.400 some other
00:58:13.780 stamps with
00:58:14.320 a value
00:58:14.720 on them.
00:58:15.520 So I'm
00:58:15.780 looking at
00:58:16.160 these and
00:58:16.520 like,
00:58:17.280 uh,
00:58:18.500 uh,
00:58:19.280 I just
00:58:20.000 put too
00:58:20.660 much on
00:58:21.020 it.
00:58:21.500 So I
00:58:21.780 just over
00:58:22.360 postaged
00:58:22.900 it.
00:58:23.860 And now
00:58:24.380 I've got to
00:58:24.740 take them
00:58:25.260 somewhere.
00:58:26.380 And I'm
00:58:26.840 like,
00:58:27.120 well,
00:58:27.400 I could put
00:58:27.800 them in the
00:58:28.100 mailbox and
00:58:28.840 put the
00:58:29.140 thing up,
00:58:30.020 but sometimes
00:58:30.860 they don't
00:58:31.220 take it.
00:58:32.580 So I
00:58:33.120 ended up
00:58:33.420 driving to
00:58:33.920 the UPS
00:58:34.420 store because
00:58:35.420 I had
00:58:35.700 another package
00:58:36.540 I had to
00:58:36.860 drop off
00:58:37.240 anyway.
00:58:38.580 And I
00:58:39.960 think altogether
00:58:40.600 I spent
00:58:41.120 half a
00:58:41.660 day trying
00:58:44.240 to put
00:58:44.560 stamps on
00:58:45.100 an envelope
00:58:45.500 and mail
00:58:46.000 it.
00:58:46.520 And I
00:58:46.700 thought to
00:58:46.980 myself,
00:58:47.760 no,
00:58:48.200 I did not
00:58:48.560 lick the
00:58:48.940 stamps.
00:58:49.440 They were
00:58:49.620 self-licking
00:58:51.240 stamps.
00:58:53.660 Man,
00:58:54.700 we've got to
00:58:55.920 get rid of
00:58:56.300 the post
00:58:56.660 office.
00:58:57.760 Let me
00:58:58.040 ask you
00:58:58.360 this.
00:58:59.720 If
00:59:00.000 Amazon.com
00:59:04.700 offered to
00:59:06.340 buy the
00:59:07.160 post office
00:59:07.820 and privatize
00:59:08.780 it,
00:59:09.460 would you
00:59:09.840 be okay
00:59:10.280 with that?
00:59:11.380 I would
00:59:11.980 because that
00:59:13.340 post office
00:59:14.000 should be
00:59:14.480 taking the
00:59:15.080 mail that
00:59:15.500 I get,
00:59:16.500 scanning it,
00:59:17.360 and emailing
00:59:17.960 it to me,
00:59:18.460 period.
00:59:19.460 I should
00:59:20.040 never get
00:59:20.700 a piece of
00:59:21.380 mail.
00:59:21.740 Let me
00:59:21.960 tell you
00:59:22.200 my other
00:59:22.560 mail problem.
00:59:24.400 So several
00:59:25.040 years ago,
00:59:25.680 I created
00:59:26.360 a rule
00:59:26.940 where no
00:59:27.800 U.S.
00:59:28.380 mail can
00:59:28.880 enter my
00:59:29.400 house.
00:59:30.300 It can
00:59:30.700 only enter
00:59:31.100 the garage
00:59:31.800 because the
00:59:32.660 garbage is
00:59:33.140 out there.
00:59:34.120 So I
00:59:34.620 always sort
00:59:35.160 my mail
00:59:35.680 in the
00:59:36.540 garage
00:59:37.000 because if
00:59:37.380 it gets
00:59:37.620 in the
00:59:37.840 house,
00:59:38.240 it becomes
00:59:38.600 a big
00:59:38.900 pile of
00:59:39.580 garbage
00:59:39.960 in your
00:59:40.280 house.
00:59:41.360 And
00:59:41.520 almost all
00:59:42.280 of the
00:59:42.540 U.S.
00:59:42.860 mail is
00:59:43.180 garbage.
00:59:43.840 Almost
00:59:44.080 all of
00:59:44.460 it.
00:59:45.280 So I
00:59:45.920 sort it
00:59:46.300 in my
00:59:46.600 garage so
00:59:47.600 that it
00:59:47.860 can't get
00:59:48.240 in my
00:59:48.440 house.
00:59:49.400 But my
00:59:50.100 mailman
00:59:50.700 keeps
00:59:51.340 thwarting
00:59:51.900 me because
00:59:53.220 if he has
00:59:54.540 a package,
00:59:55.140 he'll bring
00:59:55.440 it to my
00:59:55.820 door,
00:59:56.680 and then to
00:59:57.160 do me a
00:59:57.560 favor,
00:59:58.280 he brings
00:59:58.760 the mail
00:59:59.400 also to
01:00:00.280 the door.
01:00:01.380 And I'm
01:00:01.520 like,
01:00:02.020 mailman.
01:00:04.000 I love
01:00:04.460 my mailman.
01:00:05.360 He's a
01:00:05.620 great guy.
01:00:07.320 But I
01:00:07.860 don't like
01:00:08.140 mail in
01:00:08.500 my house.
01:00:09.820 Can you
01:00:10.140 bring it
01:00:10.420 to my
01:00:10.680 garage?
01:00:11.500 There should
01:00:11.900 never be
01:00:12.300 mail in
01:00:12.680 my house.
01:00:14.060 All right,
01:00:14.440 that's enough
01:00:14.840 on that.
01:00:15.160 I will
01:00:17.180 talk to you
01:00:17.640 all later.
01:00:18.900 here.