Miss Understood No. 11 — Ben Bankas： 'Some Women Suck'
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
195.02603
Summary
Join us as we discuss toxic femininity in the wake of the Johnny Depp and Amber Heard trial, and our guest Ben Bangus, a Canadian comedian who likes to criticize the government, joins us to discuss his views on the Depp/Hearn case and the toxicity of femininity.
Transcript
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it's only sort of true it's half true it's 100 true you know what you're fired okay yeah
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just cut him out of the show let's just cut him out you're like why isn't he being comedian
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then i say something funny you're like get him out of here
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hello and welcome to misunderstood the show for the politically and
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culturally misunderstood lady or gent we are your hosts i'm nat i'm kat and today we have a
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very special episode because as you can see we have a guest in studio and i'm not in the studio
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because i'm sick so i'm sitting in this weird hallway um let's kick off the show it's not
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necessarily covid not necessarily um we're gonna kick off the show with our patented culture shock
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moment of the week take it away nat yeah so culture shock some comedians are still funny
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yeah so uh ben bangus is a canadian comedian who as we just saw likes to criticize the government
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and today he is joining us to discuss toxic femininity in the wake of the johnny depp and
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amber heard trial and we're gonna get into some shenanigans so hello thank you for joining us
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hello thank you for showing that video um i like that you showed it it's like somebody else posted it
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yeah so it only had like 93 likes so it made me look really was that not yours
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i think he's not that famous so you need to follow him
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yeah i'm only getting 80 likes on a no i think that has that has like 40 000 views on my video
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was that sent in yeah it was sent in by a fan that's nice no that's not true that's a lie okay so
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so ben bankus you're a comedian uh can you tell us a little bit about like what you do
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i'm funny and i make uh fun of things that people don't want to make fun of or
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in the mainstream is is frowned upon and i have my own podcast the ben bankus podcast where i talk
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about news kind of similar to this except you know i'm a man and you're so it's worse
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um no you guys are funny but you know i talk about you know maybe different news articles that you guys
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talk about just just stuff that pisses me off when i'm reading because that's you know people i think
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you should do what you know and mostly what i know is lying in bed scrolling uh twitter and getting
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upset so um and then of course i perform yuck yucks um i headline there and show other shows
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other places you can check all of it out at ben bankus.com ben bankus too on instagram because they
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the government deleted my first instagram video because i was basically i take um for those videos
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i'll take a press conference and i'll make fun of it i'll i'll do a voice over uh of what i think
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they're actually thinking or saying or what they should be actually thinking or saying one of my
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favorite ones ever is the doug ford um like i've watched it so many times they're like omicron's
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landed boys we're shutting her down omicron just landed boys and we're shutting her down
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we call it a circus breaker timmy's has only given out tim beebs at 50 capacity
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it's uh it's a different take than um a lot of comedians especially in toronto take which i
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guess i don't really know what the other comedians are talking about because i i don't watch them
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because i'm not like allowed into yuck yucks well there's even comedians i mean there was a thing
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today uh that came out that there's a comedian in the toronto community who's been written about
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in cbc as if you know they're this magnificent you know thing and i just checked their instagram
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they have 14 000 followers but every video has like 35 likes so seems to be deprived people buy
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followers and then you can get a cbc article you know i'm sure you have to have the right politics
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for that for sure for sure yeah yeah something tells me you have to be a little bit politically
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correct um so what's it like then being a comedian you know who is critical of the government when
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everyone else in toronto as kat kind of mentioned seemingly seems to follow the mainstream narrative
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and seems to subscribe or uh to like a politically correct kind of vibe like is it difficult being a
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comedian like i don't think everybody does but i think that you know toronto works so hard and
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canada works so hard at the propaganda of trying to convince everybody that this is this you know
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we have taken over it you know it is lit i saw an article last week it's liberal owned toronto
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but the reality is there's a lot of people who don't agree with it uh they don't find it funny my
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friend was just on um you know a morning talk he was listening to a morning talk show he called in
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because they were talking about they went to second city and they said all they did was make
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fun of conservatives and make fun of conservative thought and it wasn't funny um you know i make
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fun of conservatives too but it's funny uh you know and i'll trick liberal audiences into laughing at my
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stuff you know i did a show last week with super woke audience because it was like uh it was a basically
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an open mic at my friend's um comedy club and one of the people in it was a woke person who brought
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all their friends because they worked together and by the end of it i was making fun of her for being
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woke she was laughing at it so i think you know this fear of putting somebody who has a different
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idea in the spotlight has no you know is not grounded in reality because the reality is if you do that
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that person's going to adapt you know adapt and figure out how to make larger groups of people laugh
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from different political backgrounds but the government doesn't want that to happen because
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people will become more moderate even if they do believe in a lot of things on the left you know
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they'll become more moderate when they laugh at something oh shit that's actually that makes me you
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know i've realized something in this moment and i think that that's what people need with comedy and
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on the other side the people on the right who come to my comedy laugh and they feel
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more heard or you know and you know they know not all my jokes are are like that right yeah and i
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think you see that just in general um on the left because um like essentially you know we see like
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they don't they censor us right and they don't they they you know shadow ban conservatives and they
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censor what we say and stuff and i think it's partially because they they know that if our ideas whether
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they're presented in a joke or not are actually good and people might stop and think and consider and
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as you said become more moderate so it's interesting to see how that see seeping into the arts and um
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in comedy too yeah there's a huge push from people right now to just keep spitting out what they've
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been told and they don't really you know it's you know i don't want to say do your own research it's
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not about doing research it's just about being present and you know reading the media that you know
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and and having your own opinion on it and not just we were taught that in university i mean i went
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i took political science course and they literally said every article you read is not 100 true and is
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is biased we learned in high school even that you know they explained that documentaries are biased
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you know they're people are making them for a reason to prove a point um similar to like an essay
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would be biased because you're writing about one specific thing we you know this is common knowledge
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that we've all collectively decided to forget about and it's kind of like that art i don't know if you
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saw the article today saying that uh covid can affect your memory and it's like maybe because i you know
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if i remember correctly then there's an issue but that that would make sense if i everything i
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remember it is wrong you know what i mean like oh yeah no the lockdown was actually uh it's like
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gas lighting it is the government is the government is toxic femininity yeah uh they have they've
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become this you know because if they were toxic toxic masculine which governments have been in the
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past you know they're they're blowing stuff up you know they're uh you know glorifying whatever i don't
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know women's bodies i guess that kind of like women women's bodies have all like men have always liked
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them it's not like that we just started liking them it's more that women have realized like oh
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let's just you know i can just i don't have to work for somebody else to you know be on a pepsi ad
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to to to look sexy and get money i can you know just take pictures of myself and start you know uh
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whatever the bracelet companies from asia start messaging you and your dm boxes for the ladies right
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and then they go should i just wear it and take pictures and i'll get 25 you know so it's
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yeah we're in this toxic femininity thing where the country wants to gaslight the citizens and do
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all this like weird stuff where we should just be open and honest i don't know you know the
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politicians could just apologize and be like they were wrong and everybody would kind of just be like
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okay the only people who'd be pissed off at that are their you know hardcore followers who who think
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that they can't do any wrong they'll defend you know like on my podcast i was talking about how
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the government wants to rebuild trudeau's house or the trudeau's house i mean probably going to be
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his house for the rest of our lives yeah but or at least his life but so you know they're rebuilding
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this place he hasn't even lived in it because it's not up to his standards of you know i'm a prime
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minister how could i live in such a dump that every other prime minister lived in um you know so now they
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want to spend 40 million dollars you know to fix it just so he can like this is i don't know that's
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like something like a rich housewife would do that you know just married a really rich dude and she's
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and he's she's bored and she's like let's just redo the house and live in a we'll live in a cottage for
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three years you know like a cottage well that's where they he lives he lives at that place right it's
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what is it called the rito cottage or something yeah i think i think so he's never lived at never
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lived there never in the article never he's never even hung out and smoked a joint there in blackface
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not even once that's shocking because we know he loves to do both of those things yeah i mean who doesn't
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uh-oh so being like a male comedian though do you find that um you have to censor yourself when it
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comes to talking about you know women and stuff because obviously there are a lot of smart women
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who can can laugh you know who can take a joke and stuff but i find a lot of people are so sensitive
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and actually this isn't just exclusive to women like people are just so sensitive right now do you
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find specifically on the topic of like me too and believe all women and all that that that has
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kind of been difficult for male comedians to navigate specifically in like a really progressive
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city like toronto i mean no i think it's actually you know it's been it's actually made things worse
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for i think okay maybe i'm wrong but i think it's made certain things worse for women because now a
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lot more guys are you know hesitant to help female comics they're hesitant to reach out to them on social
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media hey what's up you want to do my show like they're worried they're going to get me too'd for
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anything like liking a picture on insta you know facebook why did he like it i don't want to
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interrupt you ben but um having been a amateur comic many many moons ago i can say that when a
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guy says oh i can help you with your material it's often been code for like oh you don't want to hook
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up on my dirty disgusting futon and then you're kind of like ousted from the invites right well you
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probably don't want to be on that anyway you don't want to be i i agree with that you don't
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want to be on the futon but i mean more in the sense of like you know professionally like hey come
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to the show do you i can drive us to the show because you know there are those there's so many
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creeps in comedy but the people who aren't creeps uh sometimes get screwed over and the people who are
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creeps are the ones trying to like get them canceled so uh you know like for me like there's a few female
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comics i think are really funny and you know but uh you know you two are funny i don't know if you
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do do you do stand up no but but i mean you can still be a you can still be a comic and not do stand
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up right like in doing podcasts and stuff and comedic stuff but in terms of stand-up there's funny
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comics and the girls that are funny don't give a shit they you know you know that of what the material
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is that we say right and i think for the most part most of the guys are pretty respectful i mean i
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have a couple friends who are like alcoholics but then they feel you know they're like i tried to make
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out with her and she didn't and then it was sad and you're like yeah you're an idiot but but that's just
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men though like that's but it's also men in comedy i mean men in comedy are coming into contact with
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women for some of them for the first time in their lives you know what i mean they didn't go to
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university or have a fun experience or go anywhere so um but in terms of material for me like i think
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female audiences love being made fun of for things they do and pointing it out i think in a lot of
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ways it's easier to make fun of the woman uh in the crowd than the men because you know if you up
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you're not gonna get slapped in the mouth like well yeah that could happen i mean i make i try to make
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fun of everybody and you know i try to make it equal so i don't yeah yeah but i mean there is a
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wokeness to doing you know like what i do is considered like alt-right but it's actually not
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because i just make fun of everybody and if i did this in 1995 or 2005 or 2010 or even like probably
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until like 2013 like people would just be like this guy's hilarious but for some reason now it's
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about he's problematic even though every like literally every race and religion comes to my
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shows and everybody has a good time we put on people of all backgrounds and we put on women and
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you know it's not like six white you know the woke shows are actually quite white i don't know if
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you've been to any if you go to like comedy bar or something but a lot of them are white
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well i'm trying to think back of my some of my friends back then um and i remember talking to
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this on the show earlier one of our earlier episodes but i had i'm not going to name names
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but he was a comic you definitely know him and when i was going to humber he asked me if i was a
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feminist and again white guy uh he asked me if i was a feminist and i was like no i don't consider
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myself a feminist and he's like you're doing your sex a disservice like you should definitely consider
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yourself a feminist and it's like who that who the heck are you to tell me how to be a woman and
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and this person was also one of those guys that i mentioned who's like oh i can help you come over
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to my futon and it's like so you're a feminist but you're also creepy and you're also and like
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there's nothing wrong with being a white male but it's also like you travel in circles of other white
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males who are also telling other people that like you have to be this you have to be woke you have to be
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feminist and it's like why is it always the same guy like a skinny white guy who's telling everyone
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that they're racist and sexist and homophobic and it's like look at yourself i mean it's just the
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pot calling the kettle black and it's it's people going don't you know that white people are racist
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it's like you're racist you are yeah uh you keep talking about it every day you look at people of a
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different race and go oh the poor man he's been you know brutalized by you know what the what are you
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doing i mean just be a person and you know i've said this many times it's you know woke culture is
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is a way for people who always wanted to be bullies they were always bullies but people would you know
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cool people would just shrug them off and go this guy's a loser whatever and now they feel they have
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this power that if you shrug me off i'll get you fired i'll you know if you work with somebody for
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instance who's like really annoying and woke and you're just like honestly i don't shut up you know
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like you'd get fired whereas if it was the other way around and you were you know talking about
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something talking about toxic femininity with your friend and they and they got mad you know so
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either way you're fired whether you you know it's in that and that it just has to do with people
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want this power they want they want to have a power to you know it's like during the lockdowns
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when people would scream at you your nose is out your mask not on properly i mean these people
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want they want what they didn't have in high school when they were bullied for just being
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themselves because they suck yeah it's a power trip and now they're part of the powerful
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victim group or or so they want to believe so if i and i guess it's because if you're a white cis hetero
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male you're not really in any of those victim groups so you have to be a feminist
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feminist and anti-racist and now all of a sudden you're in that protected class i think the guys
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who say that they're male feminists the reality is they just can't get women and that's just their
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last resort is being like okay i'm a male feminist like you know as much as no no last resort is
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becoming a woman i think right i'm gonna change her with you that's after they become a sex offender
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though yeah yeah right then they change genders it makes prison easier for them
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so maybe we should talk a little bit about what's going on with johnny depp and amber heard um just
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because we are kind of kind of talking about the topic of toxic femininity so do you have any initial
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thoughts are you updated on what's going on do you have any thoughts i mean i'm as updated as
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you know i think i need to be but okay i read about it i watch some of the video on twitter you
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know i'm not like a super expert i don't even really know what happened originally um i thought
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it was all dealt with yeah this has to do this is him suing her right yeah for 50 million dollars
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for defamation um so maybe let's just start with that uh tick tock just kind of giving a brief
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overview of the timeline of things because why read when johnny depp and amber heard trial just
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started here's what you need to know johnny and amber got married in 2015. in may 2016 amber heard
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entered a courthouse with an alleged bruise on her face she claimed that johnny depp had been
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abusive towards her and filed for a restraining order and divorce she says that the bruise on
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her face was from johnny depp throwing a phone at her however a few days prior the police had
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investigated a domestic violence call at johnny depp's home and found that there was no evidence
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of a crime eventually amber heard rescinded her domestic violence restraining order and johnny gave
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amber seven million dollars as part of their divorce settlement and the divorce was finalized in 2017.
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and here's why there's a new court case in 2018 amber heard wrote an op-ed for the washington post
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in which she spoke about the treatment of women in domestic abuse cases she said that as a result of
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her speaking out against sexual violence she lost a two-year campaign with the global fashion brand
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and it raised questions of whether she could keep her role in aquaman and justice league and in 2019
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johnny depp sued amber heard for 50 million dollars for defamation in that washington post article
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saying that the article damaged his reputation and career though she didn't name johnny depp as her
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alleged abuser depp's lawyers are arguing that it's fairly clear that it was meant to be about
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him disney dropped johnny depp from the pirates of the caribbean franchise four days after the
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article was published johnny depp is denying that he ever abused her and that her is not a victim
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of domestic abuse she's the perpetrator part two is already up to get a little more background on
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what's going on now johnny very informative mm-hmm yeah so uh hashtag believe amber just can't believe
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all women and if you don't believe all women you're scum yeah you're basically a trucker full
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stop um it's a it's an interesting one because obviously none of us are there but and it's like
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i don't know what seeing a picture of a woman with a bruise on her face it evokes certain feelings like
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people magazine had uh when she originally came out and um requested a restraining order against him she
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like her friend took a photo of her like bruised face um and that was all over people magazine so
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that was obviously very disturbing to look at but it's like you could just have a bruise on your face
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like this is she a psycho or is she actually like i smack my head all the time yeah she just had a bruise
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on her face well i listen i'm a little klutzy like there's not a day goes by that i don't have a bruise
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somewhere on my body so it's like can i just be like oh you're abusing me and again i don't want to be like
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she's definitely not being abused but like yeah i i definitely think like they both have mistreated
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each other i i don't think anyone's necessarily innocent in this situation i just think one is a
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little more innocent than the other and i think one of the things that even their therapist had said
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was that um she would show up with bruises on her face and she wouldn't explain why like to a
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counseling session she'd just show up with these bruises and she wouldn't even mention them in the
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session and it's like isn't this why you're here like you're you're preaching about you know you're
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complaining about your husband and um trying to you know frame him in a certain way to your
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therapist and yet you're not even mentioning the bruises on your face like hello you should be
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specific about that amber yeah was she not no she just showed up and did she didn't say anything about
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the bruises no well she comes out later and says like look at these bruises with the pictures but not
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at the time with the actually apparently no one none of his friends or family had ever seen the bruises but
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then they just like show i mean she's she's merely a terrible person because he gave her seven
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million dollars and she didn't just off i was gonna say like seven million dollars is go away money
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like just stop writing articles go find a new husband you know beat the crap out of him or
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get him to beat you up or whatever you do and then get another seven mil and just start like a you know
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a real estate empire and and let johnny depp do pirates of the caribbean 12 or whatever
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he was dropped from the franchise after her like op-ed came out in the washington post allegedly
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about his abuse so it's like that's that's money yeah that's that was right that was right in the heart
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of me too and yeah louis ck and all that so a lot of people lost a lot of money okay so what do we all
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think about the fact though that he had known she had a cycle of abuse with other relationships
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before so why would he marry her knowing that like that i find a little that i find that a little
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weird because she has she probably well seriously it's like men are men you could tell anything
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women that are not so nice she probably spun it too like women aren't like i uh pushed him to the limit
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until he you know beat you know beat me up right they're not gonna say that they're gonna be like
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he was nuts and he just was so horrible you sound just like her is amber heard here but i mean he did
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say that when he first met her he thought it was too good to be true because she was too good like she
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was too nice too funny too smart too available i suppose um so it's interesting that's part of the
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toxic web i think yeah i think so too love bombing and then the abuse comes later yeah and so you i
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mean you know you're you're a guy have you do you experience i don't know i don't want to assume
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your gender yeah sorry oh gosh uh i don't want to assume your gender i'm so sorry but um
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but you know what is it i'm a little trans boy oh goodness gracious a lot's going on with him today i
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mean her today um but what's it like being a man in the wake of all this because this you i thought
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the me too movement was really just gonna die down but it doesn't seem to have like i know normal
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people are like okay this is kind of bs like we should believe you know there are men right now go
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you know accusing their their partner of being like amber heard and they're they're simply just
00:24:01.520
getting punched in the face for it so like like metaphorically probably not there's probably a guy
00:24:09.040
out there is being like you're being exactly like amber heard and just punch him right apparently she
00:24:13.760
put a cigarette out on his face she did yeah that's what johnny depp said yeah allegedly yeah
00:24:20.160
i mean what's annoying about this case is like he's rich like he should have just been like i'm gonna go
00:24:26.720
fly to some foreign country and meet some equally beautiful girl you know a lot of guys are in a
00:24:34.320
situation where they just they can't do that they don't have any money they're still being told you
00:24:39.920
know there's still cigarettes being put out but i mean i don't know how many i think everybody's just
00:24:44.640
abusing each other because uh everything's just so horrible and you know generally though as as a guy
00:24:52.320
that was the question right like what's it like yeah like how's the dating scene for you like if
00:24:58.400
you're meeting a new girl do you have to like put it out there that you're like hey i don't subscribe
00:25:04.080
to the mainstream nonsense like do you lay it all out or do you let her figure it out and she'll
00:25:10.160
she'll be like you're toxic like do you let that happen naturally like i don't uh i don't really know
00:25:16.640
because i mean i've i have a girlfriend um we've been dating since august and she or july and uh she's
00:25:26.080
uh pregnant so oh congrats yeah that's amazing so but when i met her i mean she was a fan of my comedy
00:25:36.000
so she wasn't like are you a male feminine yeah she knows so and i and i think that
00:25:42.960
people who are on a dating app to meet people is stupid now i mean more than unless you're woke
00:25:50.160
and you're just a loser and you're you know you want to meet other woke losers okay sure
00:25:55.040
but if you don't like just go do something interesting go to a thing go to a political thing go to a
00:26:02.400
you know go to something that has you know a connection to your beliefs or the way you want
00:26:08.560
to live your life go to the gym i mean i'm sure you're you know not all the girls i don't think
00:26:14.480
the girls at the gym are like super woke um for instance so it just depends what you're looking for
00:26:21.200
i mean i know guys who have lied about have to lie about the certain things to to sleep with girls to
00:26:27.600
you know say whatever you know when the vax was happening that if they weren't they would lie or
00:26:32.880
you know they or whatever right i mean guys lie about that all the time what they do for a living and
00:26:38.000
but they're just adding more things to the what do i have to lie to you about oh i believe in
00:26:43.280
kamala harris is amazing or whatever you'd have to say global warming is the biggest threat to
00:26:48.560
civilization right but i don't think you're gonna say that and then like have you know the best uh
00:26:53.520
sexual experience of your life that's probably true after you talk about how much you like you know
00:27:01.200
joe biden or something nothing turns me on no not going there so i mean this weird topic though of
00:27:10.080
like uh husband i'm sorry wives abusing their husbands that's interesting like why do you think
00:27:14.560
this isn't talked about i don't really find we hear about it very much in the media uh it obviously exists
00:27:20.800
do you think it exists more though because there's kind of been this weakening of men in a way because it
00:27:25.440
seems like strong women are like preying on weak men on purpose and i just i don't personally
00:27:31.440
understand why um do you have any thoughts on that why well i think this has been happening forever um
00:27:42.080
you know you know and now they have terms for it they call it narcissistic abuse or they call it
00:27:47.760
you know whatever but i think that the reality is we were all just sold something that's not true we
00:27:56.160
were sold that this is how women are they're these nice caring you know people that just care about
00:28:03.120
everything and they have very sensitive and you know that's kind of like 90s kids 80s kids for sure
00:28:09.680
and anything before that were sold this idea right and it was never true uh i mean women have always been
00:28:17.360
strong and fun you know funny and whatever mean they can be mean um you know they can be incredibly
00:28:25.920
nice just like men can be incredibly nice there was just you know and and that's what i find funny
00:28:30.240
about now as we talk about equity instead of equality and it's like why not just say like men and women
00:28:34.400
are very similar here's the reasons we're similar here's the reasons we're different a lot of them are
00:28:38.000
biological um but you know but women want uh or this with this women's movement wants to like you
00:28:48.400
said make men weaker and then these men kind of you know i guess get abused i i think a lot i think it's
00:28:57.280
not true though i think a lot of the weak men end up with you know they're they're in these very equal
00:29:03.120
relationships like you ever go to the the park and you see like two people they're like it's like a
00:29:08.080
girl and a guy they're like the same height they're like the same body type pretty much just the same
00:29:14.080
yeah they dress the same they're the same um you know but they both would probably cheat on each other
00:29:20.320
because they both hate each other secretly very secretly it's very it's all it's like the covet
00:29:25.520
thing just bury everything all your real thoughts don't matter we have to trust some trust and whatever
00:29:30.560
so i think the people like i'm sorry no no go ahead i was just gonna say like there is like
00:29:36.000
statistically more successful relationships with people who do look alike and i don't know maybe
00:29:40.800
that's just a new trend or maybe that's always been the case and i think sometimes people think that's
00:29:45.760
like looks racist or something because people have preferences so you might have a preference towards
00:29:51.360
someone who looks like you which is kind of narcissistic but i think that's like a thing
00:29:58.800
well we all want like our our dad or our mom right i mean there's there's that psychology where
00:30:04.080
you know you grow up wanting to if you're a woman you want to meet somebody kind of like your dad and
00:30:08.720
you know yeah which is actually an interesting point because amber heard actually mirrors a lot
00:30:12.800
of the characteristics of johnny depp's abusive mother so it's interesting that it's like this lifelong
00:30:19.120
so that could be another factor that guys who had an abusive mom are going to end up
00:30:24.320
being with abuse or had a mom like this or had a mom like that and same with you know girls who
00:30:29.600
had a you know a dad that didn't really care or whatever it wasn't there so they don't want you
00:30:35.600
there i don't know yeah daddy issues etc it's all very like normal stuff that i think now we're being
00:30:41.280
like why is this happening or is it fair and it's like well it's never going to be fair because women
00:30:46.880
are women and you know we're not just gonna you know that'd be a weird society to live in too where
00:30:53.840
we're just making women feel bad we shouldn't stop making anybody feel bad for the worst of what their
00:31:01.360
race gender yeah or whatever can do it's like this happened this specific woman sucks uh there are other
00:31:08.800
women who suck uh and they shouldn't they should try not to and you know and then i think less people will
00:31:15.840
do it but i think talking about it's good i think there's a lot of girls who see the amber heard
00:31:21.920
thing and they're very sensitive about it because they know that they've potentially done things like
00:31:27.600
that but you know like they'll be it's not as bad as the nfl thing where you know the guy like throws
00:31:33.840
her into a tv or whatever right so it's never that you know unless she like kills him in his sleep or
00:31:39.280
something there's usually and there's tons more abuse like that happens that no they never call
00:31:46.240
anybody about it because they're just they just like beating the out of each other because people
00:31:50.400
are psychotic well and there is there is a case to be made about whether or not johnny and amber heard
00:31:56.320
kind of enjoy this toxic part of their relationship because they seem to keep coming back to each other
00:32:01.600
they've been divorced for several years now like let it go but they keep it's kind of like gone girl
00:32:06.080
almost that's what it reminds me of in a way like they keep they keep fighting for each other and
00:32:10.720
fighting at each other and i find it's a little bit like do they enjoy i think it can be a defense
00:32:17.120
mechanism too for both women and men but if they sense that their partner's bored or has uh the ability
00:32:26.960
to move on to other people maybe they want to cause you know you know problems and then it then
00:32:35.840
that person's going to want them more and which it actually yeah like an emotional roller coaster
00:32:39.920
because guys like love crazy chicks right like that's a thing only if they're hot though we don't
00:32:44.480
we don't even think we don't even love them like idealize them it's more that we just there's something
00:32:49.760
chemical going on something exciting biological it's just like women with bad boys it's like you know
00:32:56.640
that he's not going to be a good father he's a terrible person but it's like some like you said it's
00:33:00.640
like some chemical biological thing where women are like oh he's bad that's like yeah he's he's bad
00:33:05.440
like yeah i guess that's like a more immature thing too that people want to you know relive high
00:33:11.760
school all the time and and stuff like that but it's it's hard for two people who want the same thing
00:33:17.600
to come together because it's just there's so many people and so many people want different stuff
00:33:23.760
and especially now whereas like 30 years ago it's like you either wanted to be single till this age
00:33:29.200
or you wanted a relationship and start a family now it's like i want to be a cat you know so how you
00:33:35.200
you know or whatever other crazy ideas you have about relationships or you never want to you only
00:33:39.920
want casual sex or you you know there's all these different things that exist now that didn't so it
00:33:46.640
makes that just automatically makes dating harder for young men and young men are like the me too thing
00:33:53.840
like they're scared to that's why they end up that's why they end up they end up creepy yeah because
00:34:01.520
they didn't know they didn't learn how to talk to women because their parents are losers and they're
00:34:06.000
like be nice to all the girls at school it's like you need a guy to kind of go in there and just you
00:34:11.360
know let be a boy go go have some balls yeah that's why we have these sayings that you know they want
00:34:16.960
to get out of the vocab the boys will be boys right which is like an offensive thing now and it shouldn't
00:34:22.800
be and i mean one of the greatest examples of this was the gillette commercial about toxic masculinity
00:34:28.320
that was that basically is trying to instill in young men that it's wrong to be an actual biological
00:34:34.640
male like it's wrong to give in to your biology and of course we must have self-control but like
00:34:39.680
sometimes it's good to just rough around with your friends you know i i think that needs to be
00:34:44.880
fostered in both i mean there's never there's never an argument from the other side saying
00:34:49.120
you know like okay with the boy the boys would be boys thing is like well that shouldn't be an
00:34:52.960
excuse for stuff but it's like of course but if you're a woman then you know well you don't want
00:34:57.920
to say that to her because she's a woman and she may be offended which you know not is not true 100
00:35:03.760
of the time either but there's no conversation about don't say that to a guy he'll be he'll that'll hurt
00:35:08.640
that'll hurt his feelings or whatever yeah or that'll make him angry like you if you say that it's
00:35:12.800
like almost like apologizing for like misogyny but with women i totally agree sometimes it'll just
00:35:17.920
like well you've never talked to a girl before we change our minds we do this we like it's true we
00:35:22.560
men and women are totally different but like i i get what you're saying we're like it's always like oh
00:35:26.480
like a woman will be kind of crazy and you just kind of deal with it but if you made that same apology
00:35:32.160
for a man it's somehow like nefarious and like you're you're apologizing for like rapey weird behavior
00:35:38.080
it's like no like we're different well yeah and relationships aren't even about like loving
00:35:43.280
learning to love the other person for who they are anymore it's just like what can i get out of this
00:35:47.280
how does this make me look how does this how does this make me feel you know do i uh you know oh they
00:35:54.960
oh that you know he or she freaked out and i i don't want to be with them you know so yeah fickle
00:36:01.840
yeah no one wants to put in the work anymore yeah and i think the feminist movement is partially to
00:36:07.120
blame here and i think the rise of secularization when it comes to relationships um what are your
00:36:12.880
thoughts on like feminism and dating do you think that women have essentially just like screwed
00:36:16.960
themselves over a bit because i kind of think we have in a way especially when it when it pertains to
00:36:22.560
like secular women well i mean screwed over the girls who've been screwed over don't know they're
00:36:31.680
screwed over yet um and anybody who thinks that they are screwing themselves over is not trying not
00:36:37.920
to do that by going and dating some guy who has money or you know doing some you know uh tip you know
00:36:46.800
not typical but things that women used to you know women used to be taught like date a rich guy
00:36:52.400
like or a guy who has more money than you or or like a moral like a like a man who has good morals
00:36:57.920
like we don't we don't encourage women to look at a man for like who he is like and i do agree like
00:37:04.640
i don't it's not about being a gold digger but it is important to be like okay do you want to date
00:37:09.360
someone who's always going to be going job to job and who you can't rely on like that's one thing he
00:37:14.640
doesn't have to be mega mega rich but you're like do you want to have financial trouble your whole
00:37:18.240
life or someone that you can't trust to bring home his half or his whole or whatever it is
00:37:22.640
um yeah well no but your point is basically that if you are going to date guys not based on that
00:37:32.000
then don't like abuse him because he works at mcdonald's like yeah and like he could work at
00:37:36.640
mcdonald's would be like a moral morally upstanding man who you can depend on for the rest of your life
00:37:40.720
like we don't we don't glorify that kind of man right but if you're like if you're a good looking
00:37:45.600
woman like you have options right like you you know a good good looking guy has options but if
00:37:52.080
he doesn't have a job he doesn't but a girl with no job who's good looking has options i mean she
00:37:57.200
always has only fans yeah or but i mean like guys will date her still yeah yeah and they'll
00:38:02.560
actually be like oh you don't do anything great jerry seinfeld has like a classic joke about that
00:38:07.680
how about how women care about the job of the man but the man if she's good looking enough he'll
00:38:11.920
be like oh where do you work oh the slaughterhouse okay why don't you go shower up and we'll go out
00:38:15.280
like yeah it doesn't matter where you work you could be a bum and if you're good looking like
00:38:19.600
it's just yeah and then that's another thing that's probably by i don't know biological or
00:38:25.200
whatever but it's men don't care as much about and there's actually statistics out there not that
00:38:32.240
i have them or it can prove this but i did watch a tiktok once um but no but there are statistics out
00:38:38.560
there that the more educated and the more money a woman makes the harder it is for her to find a
00:38:45.760
mate um you know if you're if you're like 35 and you make over 400k like in this canada like you
00:38:54.240
basically have to marry only the guys who are making over 400k which is like such a small portion
00:38:59.120
of the population to be happy or you know to feel like he's still above you yeah you know because women
00:39:06.240
don't just make 400k and go okay i'm gonna date a guy who makes 50k who makes 400k my goodness someone
00:39:12.880
in government for sure well a lot of i mean you go to these real estate companies uh the vps the
00:39:19.520
brokers have been there a long time you go to any you know td bank all the fortune 500 companies there's
00:39:24.800
women in those banks who are kicking ass and they're making tons of money and they're playing the game
00:39:30.960
and they have kids and they have you know and and you know but that's just not
00:39:36.960
i think jordan peterson talked about how the whole thing is that they compare like
00:39:42.400
women to the highest income men or like the highest whatever value men they don't like there's so many
00:39:49.920
men who are struggling too right it's not like every you know unless you're a rich man or you have a
00:39:55.360
really good job and you're good looking you're screwed even if you have a good job and you're not
00:40:00.160
good looking or you're not cool enough or and even if you're in shape like i have friends who are in
00:40:04.880
shape and they have tons of money and women are just like no for whatever reason so you know i think
00:40:14.480
it's because we have so much choice and like with i was just reading an article before we started talking
00:40:20.320
about how um divorce rates have gone down with our generation over the past like 30 years but because
00:40:24.960
marriage rates have also gone down so fewer people having divorce so divorces are lower because
00:40:30.560
marriages are lower so people just aren't getting married and those that do um are staying together
00:40:36.320
more but i think it's this thing where there's like way too much choice and then there's also
00:40:41.040
society telling women like you don't have to have children which is absolutely true you don't but we're
00:40:45.600
not like we're shoving that down people's throats so much where it's like some some people have to
00:40:50.640
have children otherwise our species will die out and it's like oh do you know the feminist woman's
00:40:55.200
like oh you know sex positive and body positive and like you know that uh marilyn monroe quote where
00:41:01.360
it's like if you can't accept me at my best or if you can't accept me at my worst you don't deserve
00:41:05.520
me at my best or whatever but it's like that's so toxic it's like that's kind of amber herd mentality
00:41:10.240
where it's like i'm so hot and glamorous and beautiful but sometimes i'm gonna be so toxic and and
00:41:16.160
abusive but you have to put up with that because sometimes i'm like i'm so pretty and glamorous
00:41:21.600
and charming so like no you're toxic and like no one's gonna put up with you and you're not you're
00:41:27.120
gonna have terrible communication skills and you're not gonna want to have a family and so no one's
00:41:32.000
getting married and then everyone's just like oh like here's like you just said like here's a guy
00:41:36.400
who's like in shape has a decent job has some money but women are like me it's like because we have too
00:41:42.720
many choices and we're like no one's telling women like hey guys you have a biological clock
00:41:48.480
it's it's running out there's not that many good guys out there so like when you meet one maybe like
00:41:54.640
invoke some of those like skills like communication we don't know how to impress a man if they really
00:42:00.960
want to and it's just the idea or attract him or whatever specific guy but if they you know they'll
00:42:07.840
do that and then they'll get him and then they'll be like because it's just like then it's like what
00:42:11.760
about now what chase is he already wants me no matter what well right and as you touched on
00:42:16.560
before like our our society our generation specifically like they don't want to put the
00:42:20.960
work in they don't understand that like marriage is more than just being in love every day marriage
00:42:25.680
is like choosing someone every single day and it's a lot of work and you're you're going to realize that
00:42:30.800
as a father throwing a child into the mix is only going to complicate things as well and people don't
00:42:36.560
they don't want to put that work in and i i think it's because our society preaches
00:42:40.640
about selfishness like self yeah expediency yeah everything has to be super fun and expedient
00:42:46.000
and if not don't even bother with it but don't you think that like people that you know that idea of
00:42:51.440
oh it'll make it more complicated to have a kid makes you know like that's almost like a liberal
00:42:57.360
idea now that's like i mean it's true but it also isn't in the sense it kind of makes things make sense
00:43:03.760
more because if you have a kid with something like if johnny depp and her had a kid i mean maybe half of this
00:43:08.320
stuff wouldn't happen yeah because all they did was sit around and do coke and you know uh like
00:43:13.200
and you'd just be like here's another famous person and she would be bored and want to be on a yacht
00:43:18.000
and like why can't you be this type of rich guy you know so you have more free time to think about
00:43:22.960
the problems in your relationship arguably right you know and we're all of our i mean are your parents
00:43:28.400
together yeah are yours no that's why she's faking sick she learned no um but that's you know not all
00:43:39.600
of our parents are together but we're alive so i don't know people put this pressure on like i need
00:43:44.960
to spend eight years with them and then maybe i'll have a child it's like who would want to have a child
00:43:48.880
with somebody they knew for eight years i mean like maybe i'd be like i've known them for eight years we
00:43:53.600
had a child you know a few years in or whatever and then you know so i just think that people need
00:43:59.840
to like ride the wave of life a little bit more and stop acting like they're so special that you know
00:44:06.720
oh no this isn't for me and i have this bit you know and if it you know if you just want to be single
00:44:12.160
be single but you know don't go around uh you know messing with dudes or or complaining um and the
00:44:18.960
same goes for the like playboy guys who like you know like i don't even know if that happens anymore
00:44:23.440
that the girls fall in love with him i don't think they do that anymore they just they know exactly
00:44:26.960
what's happening um but that was a thing where like girls would go and he broke my heart he was so
00:44:34.400
cute and then he didn't like me anymore um i don't think that happens anymore because there it's
00:44:40.560
the girls like are it's like a flipped scenario and guys the guys who have money and stuff know
00:44:47.360
that this is what it's like they know how to deal with these women um for the most part i mean unless
00:44:53.440
you're johnny depp you're like he's he's like a helpless romantic who i don't think he has kids
00:44:58.400
at all does he he has kids he does have kids with somebody else they're adult kids yeah yeah he was
00:45:03.600
with someone for like yeah for 14 years they never married and they have two children who are both i
00:45:09.360
think adults now yeah um it's interesting that you mentioned like the hopeless romantic thing because
00:45:15.360
one of the articles that nat and i were reading before is about um will smith and jada um and
00:45:20.480
apparently she has gone on record as saying she never wanted to get married and she was literally
00:45:25.440
crying walking down the aisle and it's like okay a lot of brides cry down the aisle but she was like
00:45:29.680
crying like really sad tears pretty sad but he said he was like five years old and he said when i was
00:45:35.440
since i was like five years old all i could think of was picturing my family when i grew up
00:45:39.440
and then you look at her and she's like i never wanted to get married and it's like
00:45:43.760
you know they were they're boomers right so they're not even like millennials who are
00:45:49.280
like representing like the current zeitgeist or whatever but it's interesting that like the woman
00:45:54.000
is like i don't want to get married i want to be free and yada yada and then the man is like
00:45:57.840
a hopeless romantic and i think that we forget like we have this idea of in our heads that men are the
00:46:02.720
ones who are like nonchalant about marriage and stuff but that's not always the case and then women are
00:46:07.280
so often put in this box where it's like all she wants is a ring all she wants is ring but so many
00:46:11.280
of them are like they just want to have power and like this man will give them power and status now
00:46:17.680
and then they move on to the next one because like you said they're bored or none of drama or they want
00:46:21.520
a bigger yacht or whatever and it's just it's just interesting to see like i feel so bad for will smith
00:46:27.040
man like he was such a hopeless romantic and he he fell in love with this girl and she's like in my
00:46:32.880
opinion from an outside perspective i would say she's an abusive woman like did you guys see that
00:46:38.000
video cut came out after the i mean i'd love to get your opinion on the chris rock slap i know it's
00:46:43.360
kind of old news but like in the wake of that she posted a video of her just pointing her her phone
00:46:49.600
at will smith and is like babe don't you think like those round table red table discussions helped
00:46:54.160
us and he's like can you not like put me on your social media without my permission it was like
00:46:58.560
he looked so broken and then she flips the camera on herself she's like still dealing with this
00:47:02.720
foolishness like that if that was a man pointing a camera in a woman's face and being like babe
00:47:07.040
answer the question i want you to answer for my socials and she's like can you stop and then he's
00:47:10.800
like oh look at this person like she's so annoying it's like that's so abusive and you're using that
00:47:16.400
so and she posted it that's the craziest thing it's like she filmed that and then posted it
00:47:22.080
anyways i'd love to have your opinion on the chris rock thing yeah well she uh i have a joke about
00:47:27.680
that where i basically say that you know like after they you know like it wasn't enough for her
00:47:34.560
that he's worth like 250 million dollars you know the like they you know after the oscars she's coming
00:47:41.360
home upset being like i wish you did more will even though he already just got banned like he's causing
00:47:46.400
and she's like i wish you just did more about that and he's like he should have been like yeah i've
00:47:51.680
already done enough it's called uh men in black one men in black two men in black three uh pursuit
00:47:58.320
of happiness i am legend i am robot i mean you know like he's done it all and you still don't
00:48:06.480
respect him there's nobody you're going to respect you're not going to respect jeff bezos when you're
00:48:10.560
on his yacht look at the women that jeff bezos is with they're like total like you know uh you know
00:48:17.680
women who are professional trying to bang rich guy chicks whatever that is like women who only date
00:48:26.000
rich guys like i have friends in my circle and like in from high school like some of them just
00:48:30.960
went off into this world where they're like i'm only gonna date older rich guys lawyers only only this and
00:48:36.560
then everyone else is like i'm gonna date people that i like i'm like maybe find love it's just like
00:48:41.840
once you make that choice for yourself i wonder if it's like going right well i think a lot of those
00:48:45.440
women are sad about it and they know that it wasn't really something they should have done but
00:48:49.840
they did it anyway and then they try to that almost makes you a narcissist because you're just trying
00:48:54.720
to justify why you're doing this so you're like well i'm going to barcelona and i'm on a yacht and i'm
00:49:02.800
on a private jet and it's you know all about you you you but it's like are you happy uh and they'll say
00:49:09.120
yeah but the reality is when they go to the pool with uh you know with their their rich old loser
00:49:16.400
who has to pay you or pay for your stuff to to you know to have somebody there
00:49:21.840
uh you see the other people who are enjoying each other's company based on just their company
00:49:27.280
yeah um and that must feel so bad yeah it probably does and i think a lot of those women are kind of
00:49:33.360
you know what they should do is steal half his money and then go pay for some young dude
00:49:39.920
to do to do his dream good idea because at least if you no offense ladies but you know if you date
00:49:46.240
a young guy with the you know he might become something true we can make we can build him up
00:49:51.440
you women will become something but the girls who are out there gold digging like if they weren't
00:49:55.840
doing that like are they really going to become uh well they could be influencers okay no that's
00:50:03.520
a good point i think uh i think we should round things out but no i think i think we've i think
00:50:08.000
you made some really good points i think personally there's just like a really huge lack of respect for
00:50:12.000
men in our society that needs to be restored and i think of course mutual respect is important but i
00:50:16.560
think with the amber herd trial specifically we're just seeing a complete disregard for masculinity and a
00:50:22.880
complete disregard for the appreciating that and appreciating our biological differences in that
00:50:27.440
sense i think we're on the edge of it coming a full circle because i've noticed like you know
00:50:32.400
like a girl talk to me in the elevator and like i'll just say something stupid about like oh yeah i always
00:50:37.120
like i today a girl bumped into the door because i do the same thing the door opens on a weird side
00:50:42.240
it doesn't open that way so i made that comment and she was like oh because like nobody some other
00:50:48.000
loser guy with a mask on would just see that happen and be like yeah yeah i better know
00:50:52.400
you're so taken aback by like an interaction especially in the city they put their mask over
00:50:57.520
their eyes too they're nice maybe just because they're spread out so the mean people are spread
00:51:01.760
out more they're peppered throughout the county when is your when is the baby do been august oh
00:51:09.040
it's gonna be wonderful yeah well thank you so much for joining us on misunderstood where can
00:51:14.240
people follow you and support you at ben bankus too on instagram uh at ben bankus b-a-n-k-a-s
00:51:22.720
on twitter uh youtube slash uh ben bankus comedy facebook slash ben bankus comedy ben bankus.com has
00:51:30.640
all the links as well and um i think that's it that's all of them any uh final words for our
00:51:37.440
misunderstood viewers thank you so much i hope i was not misunderstood today
00:51:42.560
yeah it's a good one you will be no yeah probably no you you two are very nice and funny and it's nice
00:51:49.760
to hang out and just kind of you know be yourself without being like and why the heck would you think
00:51:55.920
that you know but um i like debating too and i i don't even know if you notice like i'll play devil's
00:52:01.120
advocate on stuff even though you know i agree with the message but i think it's important for people who
00:52:07.040
watch this show to to be like you know question everything and not just what don't fall into the
00:52:13.520
trap of the other side where they're just like only question what the left says what the people who
00:52:20.320
disagree with you you'll advance your narrative so that you know it's like just disagree with things
00:52:26.160
because you thought in your head you're like i disagree with that just say it no yeah like
00:52:30.640
conservatives are not the uh arbiter of what's right and true and pure and lovely right so it's
00:52:35.680
important to be critical we're all humans yeah capable we should let's be nice to each other
00:52:41.840
and it's things will be uh better although sometimes i do yell at people on the street
00:52:46.640
sometimes you gotta yeah sometimes they're asking for it well thank you so much for watching as you
00:52:52.320
guys know uh this show airs every tuesday at 7 p.m eastern time at misunderstood show.ca
00:52:59.600
and you can always watch all of our content if you've missed anything at watch misunderstood.com
00:53:04.640
um episode launches for free on like at 2 p.m i think on saturdays yeah and then i did it and
00:53:12.400
then go to misunderstoodmerch.com and use code misunderstood 10 for 10 off and i don't how
00:53:18.240
long is that promo going that forever until i ever you know okay well that is the promo queen so
00:53:24.800
yeah watch our show buy some merch and follow ben yeah follow ben and follow us on social media too
00:53:30.960
yeah we're gonna put all the socials down okay bye