Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - February 26, 2025


Ep 1147 | Human Egg Farms, Switched Babies & the Dark Web of Big Fertility | Guest: Katy Faust


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 16 minutes

Words per Minute

185.85359

Word Count

14,174

Sentence Count

937

Misogynist Sentences

46

Hate Speech Sentences

51


Summary

A woman in Georgia gave birth to the wrong baby. This is thanks to the mostly unregulated, big fertility industry. And unfortunately, Trump s recent IVF executive order might make this problem worse. Today, we are talking with Them Before Us founder, Katie Faust, about the latest that has unraveled with Elon Musk, Ashley St. Clair, and one of the other mothers of his children, about what modern day polygamy looks like and why children s rights matter.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 A woman in Georgia gave birth to the wrong baby. This is thanks to the mostly unregulated big
00:00:08.580 fertility industry. And unfortunately, Trump's recent IVF executive order might make this
00:00:16.260 problem worse. Today, we are talking with Them Before Us founder, one of our favorite guests,
00:00:22.540 Katie Faust. We will also be discussing the latest that has unraveled with Elon Musk,
00:00:29.600 Ashley St. Clair, and one of the other mothers of his children, what modern day polygamy looks like
00:00:38.060 and why children's rights matter. This is such a good and challenging conversation. I know you are
00:00:46.180 going to be inspired by it. So without further ado, here is Katie Faust.
00:00:59.600 Okay, actually, before we get into that conversation with Katie, I just want to let you
00:01:05.120 know that if you are a Blaze TV plus subscriber, you can get access to your Share the Arrows tickets
00:01:11.000 right now. Also, if you are a Blaze Unlimited subscriber, if you are already a subscriber,
00:01:15.560 you should have gotten that email in your inbox. Make sure to check your spam and all that good
00:01:20.160 stuff. But if you want to subscribe to Blaze TV, get access to Blaze TV and also get access to those
00:01:25.400 early bird Share the Arrows tickets right now. You can subscribe. You can go to sharethearrows.com.
00:01:31.560 You'll see where you can subscribe. And then you will get an email about your Share the Arrows tickets
00:01:36.820 just a few minutes after you subscribe to Blaze TV. For everyone else, you're not a subscriber. You
00:01:42.880 don't want to be a subscriber. That is fine. The early bird tickets will be available to you
00:01:47.300 this Friday. So set your alarms Friday morning. You can go to sharethearrows.com.
00:01:53.740 Share the Arrows.com Friday morning. Get those early bird tickets. That'll get you the steep
00:01:58.160 discount. And we've got a limited number of those tickets. And y'all, I'm so excited.
00:02:03.560 All of the speakers are lining up. We'll be doing a speaker drop soon. I would not wait for the speaker
00:02:09.080 drop, however, because I want you to get that discount. And I promise, promise, promise you will
00:02:14.080 not be disappointed by who we are bringing to Share the Arrows on October 11th in Dallas, Texas
00:02:19.540 this year. All right. That's all the information I got for you. Look out for that on Friday morning.
00:02:26.020 Okay. Now, truly, without further ado, here is Katie Faust.
00:02:35.040 Katie, thanks so much for taking the time to join us. I think this is our first time in person
00:02:39.220 talking on the show, right? In studio, baby. I love it. Oh, it's so perfect. It's providential.
00:02:44.340 Okay. First, I want to get your take on this Trump executive order that euphemistically expands access
00:02:52.480 to IVF. Really, what it would do is it would enforce or force private insurers to cover the
00:02:58.980 cost of IVF. And it would also mean probably Medicaid expansion. So either way, we're being
00:03:04.500 forced to pay for IVF. And, you know, the pro argument is this is great. It makes more babies.
00:03:10.660 We love babies. Infertility is a disease, just like diabetes. Why shouldn't insurance cover it?
00:03:17.780 Your thoughts?
00:03:18.640 Well, I have so many thoughts. I hope that the executive order is not going to amount to much.
00:03:24.500 You know, to me, it looked like a way to say promises made, promises kept, you know, which
00:03:29.520 so you can, you know, chart it as a win. But I didn't see a lot of teeth. You know, it was like,
00:03:35.060 now we're going to gather comments and, you know, receive letters and suggestions from allies over
00:03:40.000 the next 90 days. And we'll see what comes of it. Because I actually was really surprised at the
00:03:45.420 high level of pushback that the Trump executive order received. I mean, lots of many pro-life
00:03:52.300 organizations and figures condemned it or critiqued it. I mean, you had mainstream conservative
00:03:58.680 organizations like the Family Research Council saying this is not the way to go. I mean,
00:04:02.220 you had the wife of the Secretary of Transportation saying this is not aligned with what it is that
00:04:09.780 you're trying to do, especially as it relates to make America healthy again. Yeah. And I was like,
00:04:13.940 good for them. To me, I'm like, that actually is a pretty significant shift in the conservative mood
00:04:18.860 over the last 12 months where, you know, in February of 2024, we saw the decision come down from the
00:04:26.160 Alabama Supreme Court in essence saying, hey, you can't kill these babies on ice that you can
00:04:31.540 charge the fertility clinic and a wrongful death claim. And Republicans came out in mass to say,
00:04:38.140 oh, we have to protect IVF. There's still some voices that are doing that, but many more that
00:04:41.940 are saying, I don't think this is everything that we think it is. So first of all, I was really
00:04:46.560 impressed by the level of cautious, gentle, no, that I saw online. Why is this executive order a bad
00:04:55.220 idea? Well, it's fine if you are a fertility doctor and it's fine if you're an egg seller or a sperm
00:05:01.980 seller. And it's fine for the people who want to create these children who don't really have any
00:05:07.540 moral guidance around that. It's not fine for babies. It's not fine for the majority of children
00:05:13.300 who won't make it through this process alive. And, you know, one of the ways that I sort of shock
00:05:17.720 people into that realization for those of us who consider ourselves Christians, conservatives,
00:05:22.100 and pro-lifers is to just say the best that we can estimate the IVF industry, the big fertility world
00:05:31.420 destroys probably four times the number of little lives every year than Planned Parenthood does.
00:05:37.380 Why is that? Because when you go into a fertility clinic, you're talking about dozens of little
00:05:43.660 lives that are, you know, on the chopping block possibly. Whereas if you go into an abortion clinic,
00:05:48.240 you're usually talking about just one, you know, Paris Hilton, when she creates IVF babies,
00:05:53.240 she's got 20 boys, but she doesn't have the girl that she wants, right? So what's going to happen to
00:05:58.460 those 20 boys? Well, they're going to be fought and discarded, donated to research or frozen forever.
00:06:05.940 And so that's what we're talking about here. We value, we love, we think that IVF children are worthy
00:06:12.260 of dignity and respect and protection. We just think that the 97% that don't make it through the
00:06:17.480 process alive should also be extended that level of protection.
00:06:21.640 Yeah. A lot of people just don't realize that, that there are so many more embryos created than
00:06:26.740 are ever transferred and certainly than ever survive. Now there are some people who say,
00:06:32.180 okay, but Katie, it is possible for a Christian couple to say, I'm going to use every embryo that
00:06:38.040 is created. We're not going to do genetic testing. That's something a lot of people don't know.
00:06:42.540 The vast majority of people going through IVF do genetic testing. So if that embryo has Down
00:06:47.800 syndrome, trisomy 13, 18, any kind of chromosomal abnormality, they're thawed and they are thrown
00:06:53.480 away like trash and only the quote unquote strong survive and are possibly transferred.
00:06:58.980 But for the Christian couple who says, well, we're not going to do that. And a lot of Christian couples
00:07:03.620 won't do that. Is that not an ethical option for IVF? And wouldn't it be good if through this
00:07:10.060 executive order, more couples like that have access to in vitro?
00:07:13.880 Okay. So let's look at it from the perspective of, let's, let's say we're not going to ban IVF
00:07:19.160 completely. Let's just ban the aspects of IVF that are very clear violations of the rights of
00:07:24.100 children. So you mentioned one of them, genetic screening, 75% of fertility clinics offer genetic
00:07:29.560 screening, sex selection, 73% of fertility clinics offer sex selection. And in our mind, we think,
00:07:35.620 well, this is just about infertile couples wanting to have babies. There's boutique fertility clinics
00:07:40.400 in Hollywood where 90% of the clientele do not suffer from infertility. They simply want to pick
00:07:46.400 the traits of their children, not just genetic screening, not just boy or girl, but you can pick
00:07:51.620 the eye color of the child that you want and not just any eye color, right? You can create or select
00:07:58.800 the specific version of blue eyes that you want. There's like five different options in terms of
00:08:04.320 what kind of blue eyed child that you want. And so all of these options are available to
00:08:10.420 IVF customers. Um, so that's a problem because if you do want to go into this with a pro-life pro-child
00:08:18.560 ethic with a Christian ethic, you're not going to have the support of your doctors. And I've talked to
00:08:24.160 a lot of different, um, Christians who have gone through this, many that have surplus embryos, many that
00:08:30.060 did succeed in implanting all of them. But the ones that said, we went into this with pro-life
00:08:35.080 convictions, we had to argue against all of these different screenings and testings. And even then,
00:08:41.020 a couple of them have said, you know, they grade embryos. So even if they do make it through the
00:08:46.380 genetic screening process, even if they have, you know, only kept the sexes that they want, or,
00:08:52.920 or they're willing to keep both sexes, um, they still have to battle their doctors in terms of
00:08:59.180 saying, we want to implant all of them. Um, we don't want to grade them. We actually want the C
00:09:04.120 and D grade embryos kept alive as well. And a lot of the times the doctors in the clinics will say,
00:09:09.400 that's a bad idea. Why is that? It's because the only thing that they are required to report
00:09:15.400 because big fertility operates virtually regulation free. There's no requirement to track or report what
00:09:22.760 they do with these little lives. But the one thing that they do have to report is their success rates,
00:09:27.000 their implantation rates, their live birth rates of the children, the fraction of children who are
00:09:31.240 actually transferred to the womb, they have to report the percentage of live births. And if you
00:09:37.040 are going to retain or implant the lower grade embryos, you are going to downgrade their live birth
00:09:45.260 rate. And so if you want to go into this with a pro-life mentality, you're not going to have the
00:09:50.180 assistance or the help or the support of your doctor. First sponsor for the day is masa chips.
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00:11:28.680 And I just wanted to look up that claim that you made about certain fertility clinics offering the
00:11:40.400 option for picking eye color. And it's really easy. I just typed in fertility clinic eye color.
00:11:45.580 The Fertility Institute, choose your baby's eye color, offers eye color screening and selection.
00:11:50.160 So that's like you're buying a car add-on. Like, do you want chrome hubcaps? Like,
00:11:54.720 that's basically what's going on. And then the next one, simplefertility.com. This is another
00:12:01.380 website that connects you to different clinics. Eye color selection begins with examining
00:12:06.540 your personal and family eye color genetics history as parents-to-be. And there's even an
00:12:12.940 article about this in the LA Times, which you're talking about, that fertility treatments may have
00:12:18.040 started to help high-risk families avoid deadly genetic traits. Again, that's just eugenics.
00:12:23.340 But now it has moved into this industry, especially in very rich areas where people are picking what
00:12:31.020 they believe is going to be the strongest, smartest, most successful, most attractive child.
00:12:37.560 And while some people may say, well, that's not what Christian couples are doing. That's not what
00:12:42.860 most people are doing. The fact is when we talk about IVF access, it includes that.
00:12:49.020 It includes the eugenics, and there's really no way to exclude that from the conversation.
00:12:57.200 Well, there are countries that have attempted to do it. There are some countries that, for example,
00:13:00.960 ban sex selection. Germany is one of them. Germany also bans genetic screening because Germany knows
00:13:06.460 what eugenics looks like and doesn't want to go back there. There's a lot of countries that will say,
00:13:11.500 you can't just create endless numbers of embryos. We're going to limit it to the number that you
00:13:16.060 actually have a possibility of actually implanting. And let's just be very clear when you're talking
00:13:21.780 about, we're going to survey your heritable traits. We're going to figure out eye color,
00:13:26.500 all of this. You're not saying, let's then create an embryo with that specific shade of blue eyes.
00:13:31.660 You're saying, let's create 20 embryos. We will test all of them. The two that are the right sex and
00:13:37.700 that have that right eye color, those are the ones you will keep. And we will discard and donate to
00:13:42.560 research the other 18. And so we're not talking about creating a custom order child. We're talking
00:13:47.340 about making an explosion of little lives and discarding and destroying the ones that don't
00:13:52.620 match our specific outlined criteria. Yes. And an executive order like this,
00:13:57.680 if it actually came to fruition, you said this itself doesn't have teeth, but even just talking
00:14:02.320 about the accessibility to IVF in general, which is already a lot in the United States, uniquely a lot.
00:14:08.820 It also includes the two men or the two women who are purposely creating the fatherless or motherless
00:14:17.060 child or the single man or the single woman. All of this would be included in an order like this,
00:14:22.380 right? Well, I think the executive order was written carefully to say, we want to help mothers and
00:14:26.760 fathers welcome children. But the truth is that once you are making a baby in a Petri dish,
00:14:32.220 it's very easy to use somebody else's sperm or somebody else's egg. So it's very hard to say,
00:14:37.800 we are going to tailor these guidelines, these regulations in a way that only allows married
00:14:44.440 husbands and wives to use these kinds of technologies. Once you are taking that function
00:14:49.060 outside of the sexual act, it is just as easy. I mean, this is why we actually have a variety of
00:14:54.300 fertility fraud cases that are taking place across the country today, because somebody thought they're
00:14:58.960 using my husband's sperm or this specific donor. And it ended up being the fertility doctor who was using
00:15:04.360 his own sperm. And so it's very hard to say, we are going to keep IVF and we're going to exclude
00:15:11.040 all of these other really dangerous, really damaging possibilities. And I would say one of those is
00:15:17.980 using a third party to create children. How often does that happen? We don't exactly know because big
00:15:24.560 fertility won't tell us, but estimates range between a third to two thirds of the 90,000 children a year
00:15:31.960 that are born through IVF are also the very few that do make it through the process alive.
00:15:36.800 You know, 30 to 60,000 are going to lose their mother or father in the process.
00:15:41.020 Sometimes they will go home to a home where there is a mother and father present. Oftentimes they're
00:15:46.000 going to go back to a household where there is no mother or father there at all. So, I mean,
00:15:50.320 this is an industry that absolutely is not thinking about the best interest of the child. They're thinking
00:15:55.620 about the bottom line and unfortunately subsidizing it through insurance or through government
00:16:00.780 tax credits or whatever is only going to increase child victimization.
00:16:04.680 Yes. And many of those embryos go to the freezer and there are about, I think, 2 million
00:16:09.940 frozen embryos, souls on ice right now in the United States, really with an unknown future. I saw
00:16:17.460 a video of a woman. It's going around again. It's a young woman on TikTok. She seems, I'm sure you've
00:16:22.860 seen this.
00:16:23.480 I'm so glad you brought this up because I think I just watched it this morning.
00:16:26.080 Yes. I'm sure a lot of people sent it to you like they sent it to me. And actually,
00:16:29.320 when I initially did a response to her video like a year ago, she personally got very upset,
00:16:35.800 reached out to me. She said, you know, I was an IVF baby. I was selected first. We all came from the
00:16:42.420 same batch, conceived at the same time, made at the same time. She was first, her sister was second,
00:16:47.700 but she still has siblings that are 30 years old on ice. And she was saying, I want to know what it
00:16:53.960 would have been like to have a little brother because those are boys. I don't know if her,
00:16:58.120 you know, her parents wanted girls or what, but they're boys. I want to know what a little brother
00:17:02.880 would be like. What if when I got married and I had kids, I transferred one of my brothers to also
00:17:08.980 be my son. And I know she's talking hypothetically and probably isn't thinking of the consequences,
00:17:14.300 but it shows me one of the consequences and the brokenness created in IVF. What are your thoughts on
00:17:20.680 that? What was interesting to me about the video that she just put out that I saw today. So I think
00:17:24.860 it's more recent is she said, you know, what's so weird is that some random guy, some technician
00:17:30.300 decided that I would be born first, even though I'm a virtual twin with my younger sister who was
00:17:36.900 born three years later. Isn't that weird? Like that he got to decide that I would be the older sibling
00:17:41.720 and not her as the older sibling. So I think that that kind of presents a bit of an ethical
00:17:46.880 challenge for the Christians who say, we're going to use every embryo. Okay. So great.
00:17:50.600 You're using every embryo, but do you understand the kind of existential questions that these kids
00:17:57.620 are going to be asking? Why was I the one that was chosen? Why was I the one that was, you know,
00:18:02.420 selected for implantation? Why was I the one that was given, given a chance at life? And then maybe
00:18:06.540 if there is one or two or three that were implanted over the course of years, why is it that a random
00:18:11.540 guy whose name I'm never going to know decided the birth order of those of us, even though genetically
00:18:16.180 we're all the same age. I mean, like what we're doing through reproductive technologies right now
00:18:20.620 is forcing the next generation, these kids to have to answer questions that no human has ever had to
00:18:26.880 ask before. It is so out of step with the nature of what it means to be human from, you know, creating
00:18:32.980 children who might have dozens or hundreds of half siblings. I mean, that actually is like outside of
00:18:39.240 like Genghis Khan, right? We really have not seen anything like that before. Um, this questioned
00:18:44.780 about like, I am being adopted by somebody like, cause I'm, I think embryo adoption is the only
00:18:51.480 child honoring option. If you have exhausted all the other ways of trying to rescue these surplus
00:18:57.760 embryos. But even then the kinds of questions that these kids are going to ask, right? When they do find
00:19:03.800 their birth parents and they realize they were raised in Beverly Hills. I was raised in a, like a little,
00:19:08.380 you know, two bedroom, one bath condo. And I look more like my genetic parents than the three that
00:19:14.180 they chose to keep. I mean, like the kinds of questions that these kids are going to be asking
00:19:18.580 are things that I don't think that we're prepared for. I don't think we've thought it through.
00:19:22.420 Right. Yeah. I saw in one of the replies to a post about the Trump IVF executive order,
00:19:29.720 I took a screenshot of it on X and she said, I had a really good friend who had leftover embryos
00:19:34.920 and they decided to adopt them out to a gay couple thinking that that was the most redemptive
00:19:41.780 option. And I just think about that child who not only doesn't have the opportunity to know their
00:19:47.200 genetic parents, but because of the luck of the draw doesn't get to grow up with a mom. Right.
00:19:53.500 And it's, I would say that's even different than like the regular adoption of a child after
00:19:58.700 birth. I mean, there is a lot of so many questions we are causing a child to bear at such a young age
00:20:06.860 because of adult desire. Yeah, exactly. And I honestly, that is what these reproductive technologies
00:20:11.440 do in almost every case. And you could even say in every case, but I'm, I'm willing to say in almost
00:20:16.200 every case, you're asking children to sacrifice so you can have something that you want. Yeah.
00:20:21.060 Maybe in your mind, it's minimal. Maybe in your mind, it's just a relationship with a birth mother,
00:20:25.560 even though they're coming home with me, their own genetic mother and father and no money changed
00:20:29.320 hands. You know, the altruistic surrogacy situation. What does the child lose there?
00:20:33.600 There's no big deal here. No, you are still asking children to lose the relationship with the only
00:20:39.400 person they know the day that they are born. So you can have something that you want. All of these
00:20:43.360 reproductive technologies are at bottom in injustice against children. It is always asking the weak
00:20:48.780 to sacrifice for the strong. It is always asking children, the most vulnerable, the smallest of all to
00:20:54.280 sacrifice for the grown, the strong, the capable, those of us that actually have the decision making
00:20:59.440 power, the ability to deal with hardship. We're saying, we don't want this hardship. We're going
00:21:03.960 to have you kids deal with the hardship instead. These are systems of injustice. And these are
00:21:08.760 technologies that bankroll off of injustice. Yep. And because I get this question a lot, and I've got my
00:21:15.660 own response for it, and you do too. I want to hear yours. For those who say, well, Katie, there's
00:21:22.440 also separation and a primal wound that's caused through adoption. You could call that quote unquote
00:21:28.420 baby buying. Someone is paying to be able to adopt that child. So are you against adoption too?
00:21:35.820 Yeah, it's a really important question. And, you know, as the former assistant director of the largest
00:21:41.420 Chinese adoption agency in the world, one of the things that I was responsible for was compliance
00:21:45.820 with international, federal, and state level standards. And I'll tell you what those three
00:21:50.080 things had in common. One of the main bright red lines in adoption, whether you're talking about the
00:21:55.720 Hague inter-country adoption standards, or just what's going on in the state of Colorado, or the
00:21:59.440 state of California, or the state of Texas, is money can never go from adoptive parents to birth
00:22:06.640 parents. Okay? For example, my husband and I are adoptive parents. If any of the $25,000 that we
00:22:12.780 paid throughout the course of our adoption journey went directly to our son's birth mother, or birth
00:22:18.020 father, or birth family, according to international standards, that would no longer be an adoption.
00:22:23.960 That would be trafficking. If you're buying a child, if you are paying somebody specifically to
00:22:29.300 relinquish their parental rights and hand over the baby to you, that is no longer an adoption,
00:22:34.480 right? That's trafficking. So that's a very clear line in the adoption world. Yes, you spend a lot
00:22:41.740 of money on adoption. No, it does not go to the mother or to the birth father. It goes towards
00:22:47.080 the FBI to fingerprint you. It goes towards the home study agency to check the safety of your home. It
00:22:52.760 goes to the agency that might be making the arrangements or bringing together birth mom and
00:22:58.240 adoptive parents. It goes to all of the training and the post-placement support that you receive.
00:23:02.740 It does not go directly to the birth parent. So what is going on in big fertility? It is always
00:23:09.260 direct payments from the intended parents to the genetic parents and to the birth mother.
00:23:13.800 What is it that you are getting for your $2,000 when you buy that vial of sperm, right? Obviously,
00:23:20.320 it's the very specific genetic characteristics of 50% of your child, but it's also the guarantee that
00:23:27.340 that sperm donor never claims paternity. It is the guarantee that he will stay out of your child's
00:23:33.700 life forever. You are purchasing him saying, I give you my parental rights. So in that sense,
00:23:40.380 and it's the same thing in commercial surrogacy, you are paying a woman to preemptively sign over
00:23:46.000 her maternal rights to the child. That is what the money is going for. So if you're looking at it from
00:23:52.000 the perspective of the best practice of adoption that has been established internationally, nationally,
00:23:56.960 and at the state level over the course of decades, then big fertility is engaging in baby selling in
00:24:03.580 all of the, in every way that you can say that this is baby selling. It simply is. In terms of the loss,
00:24:09.680 the wound that children experience, yes, adopted kids often have a wound. And one of the things that
00:24:18.840 I get, I get a lot of responses when I go out and I talk about the distinction between big fertility
00:24:24.020 and adoption. As I say, both of them begin with a familial wound, right? But adoption seeks to mend
00:24:29.880 the wound. Big fertility inflicts the wound. But adoptive parents come up to me and say, thank you
00:24:35.860 for saying that. Because a lot of them statistically, adoptive mothers, adoptive fathers, statistically spend
00:24:42.700 more time with their children than the average family does, invest more money in their children than the
00:24:47.680 average family does. Adoptive mothers and fathers statistically have more stable marriages, and
00:24:52.600 they tend to be more highly educated than the general population. And yet, adopted children
00:24:59.720 disproportionately struggle in school with externalizing behaviors. Why is that? Well, it's
00:25:07.620 because we've asked them to do something that children should never have to do. And that is lose a
00:25:12.280 relationship with the only person they know the day that they're born and reattach to biological
00:25:16.220 strangers. And it looks as though that primal wound has an impact on them throughout the rest of their
00:25:21.540 life. So we have to make a distinction. There are tragic situations where children lose their mothers
00:25:27.340 or lose their parents. We mourn, and then we seek to right that wrong by placing children in adoptive
00:25:33.140 homes. But we do not use that loss as a justification to then intentionally create these legal or genetic
00:25:41.060 orphans so that we can purchase them on the open big fertility market.
00:25:44.780 Right. And it all goes back to worldview, understanding that we live in this sinful,
00:25:48.880 broken world, being able to say that a child that is adopted, they're in a situation that is a step
00:25:56.140 down from the ideal. The ideal is a loving, married mother and father. But because we live in a world that
00:26:03.780 is wrought with sin, we don't always get the ideal situation. So the next best situation is a married
00:26:09.120 mother and father that adopts that child. And adoption seeks to redeem a broken situation,
00:26:14.160 surrogacy, sperm, egg saline, IVF. It creates that broken situation as you have laid out so clearly
00:26:22.160 that you're placing the burden on the child in both situations, but one heals and one inflicts or seeks
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00:28:09.220 Another unforeseen consequence, or at least by a lot of people that you mentioned just a few minutes ago
00:28:16.480 is the accidental transferring of the wrong embryo into a mother. And there's this story,
00:28:25.660 I'm sure you've seen it going around, of a Georgia woman who is suing an IVF clinic after discovering
00:28:31.460 that the child that she gave birth to was not her biological child. It was very obvious the woman
00:28:36.540 is white, her baby is black. This mix-up led to a custody battle, which ultimately forced this woman
00:28:42.080 to give the baby to his genetic parents five months later. And we've got a little bit of her story
00:28:47.760 that is going around right now. Right now, it's not one. The actions of the fertility clinic
00:28:54.300 have come very close to destroying me, have left irreparable damage to my soul,
00:29:00.320 and ultimately left me questioning whether I should be a mom or not. I spent my entire life wanting to be
00:29:06.580 a mom. I loved, nurtured, and grew my child. And I would have done literally anything in my power
00:29:12.160 to keep him. My baby is not genetically mine. He doesn't have my blood. He doesn't have my eyes.
00:29:19.420 But he is and will always be my son. I'll never be the same woman. I will never fully heal or
00:29:24.860 completely move on. And part of me will always long for my son and wonder what kind of person he's
00:29:31.220 becoming. Your thoughts? Okay. So what's very interesting here is the narrative. And I think
00:29:38.360 that she actually said it. She said, in essence, I was a surrogate for another couple. And that's
00:29:43.860 right. But it's very interesting because when we're looking at these other sort of surrogacy
00:29:47.640 arrangements, everyone will say, well, it's no big deal. She's not the mother. She's not the genetic
00:29:51.820 mother. She's not the mother. She's the oven for somebody else's bun, right? The real mother is the
00:29:57.000 genetic mother. But look at her. Look at her. She is a mother in a very, very real sense of
00:30:03.680 the world. She bonded with the baby. She grew the baby. She loved the baby. And then she
00:30:08.580 continued that. She continued and capitalized on and only reinforced that bond through five
00:30:13.460 months of cuddling and breastfeeding and the oxytocin exchange that takes place between
00:30:19.540 mother and baby whenever there's skin-to-skin contact, which is so much more likely to happen
00:30:23.140 with mothers than fathers. So now she is rightly mourning this child that she gave up. And it's
00:30:29.380 interesting because she formed that bond, even though she was not genetically related to the
00:30:34.060 child. So I understand why she's saying, this destroyed me. Like, I'm never going to get over
00:30:38.000 this. Right. You have lost a baby in the sense of it really was hers in an incredibly real sense,
00:30:45.340 a sense that we have to diminish and ignore if we are going to continue with the fiction that
00:30:51.720 surrogacy is no big deal and that the birth mother is inconsequential to the later thriving
00:30:58.360 and development of the child. The other thing that I will point out is, you know, because I think
00:31:03.340 that this is, this is actually a very good illustration here. She had dozens of other
00:31:07.800 relationships, right? She had lots of other people in her life. I'm sure that she's got parents. I don't
00:31:11.980 think that she's married, but she had lots of friends probably connecting with her and supporting her
00:31:15.680 through this process. And yet losing that one baby pretty much destroyed her. That she only had
00:31:22.300 known for a few months. That she'd only known for a few months. And yet we think that it's no big deal
00:31:27.580 for the child to lose their relationship with a birth mother, even though they don't have dozens
00:31:32.160 of relationships. At that point during gestation, at the moment of birth, that is the only relationship
00:31:38.460 children have. And yet we have to believe that it's no big deal to sever the baby from that birth
00:31:44.420 mother relationship so we can hand them over to the commissioning adults. So I was like, I think
00:31:49.560 everybody looks at her and goes, Oh my gosh, this is so awful. Of course she bonded with the child and
00:31:54.300 like, wow, this is so harrowing, so awful and so devastating. Right. Now apply that to every other
00:32:00.400 surrogate situation and say, if she felt that kind of distress, how much more so the baby who has to
00:32:06.280 lose the only person they know. And the reasoning or the defense against what you're saying, I think
00:32:11.380 is so asinine. When I hear people say, well, the baby can't talk or you don't remember, you don't
00:32:17.480 remember being born. You don't remember being in your mother's womb and the baby will never, you know,
00:32:23.200 articulate that he misses something that just because someone does not have the verbal capacity to
00:32:29.260 explain their trauma or their brokenness or why they feel distress does not mean it's not
00:32:35.900 there. That is actually like the definition of exploitation is when people who do have power
00:32:42.180 take advantage of someone's incapability, disability, vulnerability to get what they
00:32:47.240 want. And because that person can't complain, we say they're fine. That's cruel.
00:32:52.720 You had Olivia Morrill on your show. She is one of the only surrogate born children who is publicly
00:32:59.020 speaking out right now. She was raised by incredibly wealthy parents, a mother and father,
00:33:04.000 exactly, and split time between Florida and Paris. So materially, she was totally set. But she talks
00:33:10.660 a lot about how she was always afraid to be abandoned. And it led to, she's been very public
00:33:16.680 about this, it led to being overly obsessively clingy, not just with, you know, her mother and
00:33:22.040 father, but also her friends. She was petrified that she was going to be abandoned by everybody all
00:33:26.820 through life. So tell me, she doesn't remember, right? Sure. She can't articulate it, but that
00:33:33.120 has left a wound in her that has manifested itself all throughout her life. And, you know, she talks
00:33:39.600 very openly and wonderfully about her husband and how he, he was the person that like a rock said,
00:33:45.360 I will not leave. You can, you can rage, you can, you know, in a mercurial sense, go up and down.
00:33:50.900 I'm not going anywhere. And it stabilized her, but all throughout her as an adolescence, I mean,
00:33:55.980 she had self-harming behaviors that she talked about because she just felt insecure in all of
00:34:00.860 her relationships. This is not uncommon actually for adopted children either. You know, my husband
00:34:06.920 and I have, um, our youngest is adopted, incredible kid, totally belongs with us. But, you know, when I,
00:34:13.540 we were just traveling last week and we were leaving a hotel room and I said, oh my gosh, run in and,
00:34:18.780 you know, grab this book because I need it downstairs. And he goes, don't leave without
00:34:23.080 me. Don't leave without me. I mean, he's 15. And I'm like, I'm going to be right here. I just need
00:34:28.400 you to grab the book because you were the last one and you know where it is, but I'm not leaving.
00:34:32.320 And so sure. He doesn't remember the day when he was born and lost the only woman that he knew,
00:34:39.920 but yet he still, even after being with our family for 13 years is not exactly sure that it's not going
00:34:47.780 to happen again. So again, sometimes children lose their mother or father to tragedy and the proper
00:34:54.200 response is to mourn. But that is not the reason why kids are losing their mother and father these
00:34:59.880 days. They're losing it intentionally. They're losing their mother or father commercially. They're
00:35:04.740 losing their mom and dad because we are normalizing motherless and fatherless homes. And then we're
00:35:09.560 calling it progress. Right. And even with the baby, if the baby stays with, say it's a situation where
00:35:15.100 you have two women. And so say the baby stays with the genetic mom and the mom who is actually
00:35:21.800 carrying him. Sometimes it's the same egg, same, you know, womb. Sometimes it's not, but they're
00:35:26.340 getting sperm from a sperm cellar. I talked to Ross Johnston. I know, you know, I think who Ross
00:35:32.040 Johnston is. Yeah. He's been on the show, you know, he, it was donor conceived. So, so they say that's
00:35:38.720 what they call it. But of course, part of his testimony, he was raised by a mom who had a lot of
00:35:43.740 different lesbian relationships, I think, growing up. But he loves his mom. His mom loves him. Yeah.
00:35:48.740 Cared for him. Yeah. And yet his distress growing up was, who is my dad? Where is my dad? Where is
00:35:56.000 half of my genetic makeup? And of course, part of his testimony is realizing that he is a heavenly
00:36:00.220 father that he came from and who loves him and who created him. But still, we were all created
00:36:05.940 to have a mother and a father or to know our mother and father because everyone on earth has a mom.
00:36:10.660 We all have a mom and dad. Yeah. And anyway, I don't, I don't know where you want to go with
00:36:14.820 this conversation, but, um, it's, there's so, I mean, cause like I've done a couple of interviews
00:36:20.220 recently about Elon and you know, the situation with his now four different mothers of his children.
00:36:26.420 Um, and it was at least that we know of, yeah, that's right. Um, and so much of that, well,
00:36:31.800 she's set for life. Well, that baby's never going to need anything. Well, that, that kid's going to,
00:36:35.540 you know, be able to go wherever he wants, do whatever he wants. And I'm like, that is not what
00:36:39.020 kids want. Right. Money is not going to fill that hole. Right. Even just other adults in the life of
00:36:45.240 the child. Yeah. Isn't going to satisfy that longing to be loved by their own father. And it's
00:36:51.560 not a, I'll take you on a trip this weekend, or, you know, even I'll let you come with me to the
00:36:57.160 white house. It is. They actually need to serve long for, and have a right to their father's care,
00:37:02.480 attention, protection, not just provision, but investment, personal investment every day.
00:37:08.300 They're not made to split time in a 50, 50 custody arrangement. They're not made to just know the
00:37:14.340 identity through some kind of known donor. You know, when you've purchasing sperm through somebody
00:37:19.480 who's okay, being contacted after you're 18 years old, those are crumbs. Yeah. That's crumbs of what
00:37:25.700 children want and deserve. Yeah. They want and deserve both their mother and father loving them and
00:37:30.840 loving each other every day. Yeah. And funny thing is, that's also the family structure and
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00:39:06.400 fast. Go to americaschristiancu.com slash alley. America's Christian Credit Union is federally
00:39:14.300 insured by the NCUA americaschristiancu.com slash alley. I do want to talk about Elon Musk. That's
00:39:25.720 actually on my list of what I want to talk about. I did an episode explaining it, but there are
00:39:30.620 some updates. So for those who don't know the background, just go back and listen to last
00:39:34.980 week's episode because we don't have time to detail everything now. Basically, Ashley St. Clair,
00:39:39.680 conservative commentator, Elon Musk, they have a child, what is probably his 14th child as far as
00:39:45.240 we know. This was not an IVF situation. I don't know if everyone knows that they actually did have
00:39:49.720 a sexual relationship, but it was the intentional creation of a father that they knew Elon Musk wasn't
00:39:56.760 going to be married to Ashley and that they were going to raise this child together in the same
00:40:00.360 household, which is why I didn't congratulate. It's not because I hate any of these people. I actually
00:40:06.040 want the very best for them. I think their child is just as worthy of love as every other child that
00:40:11.320 has ever been born. However, because I knew this was intentional and contrived, congratulations just
00:40:17.480 seemed inappropriate. And before we move on to the update, I just want to get your thoughts on that.
00:40:22.020 I wrote an article about that called The Cost of Conservative Hypocrisy at World Magazine last week
00:40:27.440 because you did have very prominent conservatives, very prominent pro-lifers congratulating Ashley
00:40:32.540 St. Clair on the birth of the baby. And I think if I'm going to sort of steel man their position,
00:40:37.960 they're saying, we just think babies are wonderful. It's good to congratulate a woman for having a child.
00:40:42.960 We want them to feel welcome and loved here. And of course, a lot of those same voices also
00:40:48.600 congratulated Dave Rubin for having two intentionally motherless surrogate born babies. And I'm like,
00:40:55.980 okay, well, if this really is just about celebrating and welcoming a child, that's fine. But none of them
00:41:01.540 celebrated Lily Phillips' very temporary announcement that she was pregnant. It ended up
00:41:08.160 being a hoax, but Lily Phillips is the OnlyFans content producer who's left with a thousand guys
00:41:15.520 in a 24-hour period or something like that. There was nobody congratulating her for that pregnancy.
00:41:21.120 And so to me, it looks more like tribal protectionism. It looks like we will congratulate
00:41:25.900 the people that align with us politically if they're having a baby, but we'll condemn people
00:41:31.120 like Pete Buttigieg if he procures two motherless children through what I think actually was a
00:41:37.640 legitimate adoption, if I'm getting that right. But he hasn't been too clear on that. And so I actually
00:41:43.740 think there's a cost to not being verbally and morally precise about this. If you're going to
00:41:50.520 congratulate, congratulate, but say, let's be clear here. There is a cost to this child. Children
00:41:58.240 don't just need to know the identity of their father. They deserve to have their father married
00:42:03.860 to their mother so they have access to their father every day. She is now seeking sole legal
00:42:09.000 custody of the baby. That's going to be devastating for the child. The baby is going to have their
00:42:16.880 development hampered because they don't have the daily presence of a father. They're going to
00:42:20.980 experience what a lot of kids do with single or double moms, which is father hunger. They're going
00:42:25.780 to hunger for male love. And that's actually going to make them pretty susceptible to people who want
00:42:31.500 to get their attention without having the same level of protectiveness and investment in the baby as
00:42:36.740 their own biological dad would. So it's a tragedy. And obviously we want to support single mothers in the
00:42:43.840 sense of recognizing that they have chosen to do the hard thing by raising the baby alone. But especially
00:42:49.480 when you have a very high platform and you ostensibly say that you are for family values and you understand
00:42:55.800 the harms that that widespread single motherlessness has brought to our country. It deserves more than just
00:43:02.380 a congratulations that certainly looks like you are celebrating not just the child, but the
00:43:06.840 circumstances. Yeah. And I, you know, like I said, I didn't congratulate. I have talked to some of the
00:43:12.560 people who did congratulate and I do not question at all that they are pro marriage and that they are
00:43:19.680 anti-surrogacy and that they are pro-life and all of that. As you said, they really did see it as I'm
00:43:26.260 just congratulating the baby. They would not congratulate someone like Dave Rubin because they
00:43:31.860 would see that as congratulating baby stealing, but they would congratulate something like this. Whereas I
00:43:37.200 would say, okay, but the arguments that I saw from a lot of conservatives were it is always right to
00:43:42.300 congratulate the baby. Right. Well, I don't know if every situation and circumstance solicits a
00:43:48.760 congratulations. There are other things to say like, wow, that baby is precious and made in the image of
00:43:53.880 God. How can I help? Yes. Sometimes congratulations simply isn't appropriate and you don't owe people a
00:44:00.440 public congratulations, especially if it is going to cause any confusion. And I still like, you know,
00:44:07.420 I've gotten a lot of pushback on that stance, but I still, I stand by it. I think that is morally the
00:44:13.320 clearest, you know, stance to take when it comes to these kinds of public controversies.
00:44:19.540 There are two things that I crave from the people that I follow and I'm pretty selected. Well,
00:44:24.140 I follow a lot of people to see what they're saying, but there's very few people that I'll say,
00:44:27.660 I will follow you in terms of your example. But the people that I follow in terms of their example
00:44:32.520 have two things, whether they're pastors, whether they're political commentators, I want clarity
00:44:38.000 and I want courage. You don't need to give me all the jazz hands, right? You don't need to like
00:44:44.760 whip up a show that's like produced, you know, million dollar production or whatever. I want you to be
00:44:50.180 clear, especially biblically. What does the Bible say? How does it apply to today? Tell me what justice
00:44:56.940 looks like. And I want courage. I want you to say it regardless of the personal cost or the professional
00:45:03.180 cost. And I will tell you that we're seeing a next generation. We're seeing Gen Z absolutely desperate
00:45:10.100 for that kind of leadership. Yeah. Right. In the influencer space, in the political space, even in the
00:45:16.520 religious space, we are seeing Gen Z swing hard away from progressivism and towards conservatism, whether
00:45:22.940 it's conservative religiously, conservative politically. And I would argue that a lot of
00:45:28.360 that is because they have seen progressivism offer such vacuous options in terms of the moral options
00:45:35.080 for our life. They have tasted and seen the horrible fruits of family breakdown. They've tried all the
00:45:41.900 different sexual identities and seen that none of this is going to satisfy them. So they are returning to
00:45:46.580 church. I mean, I know this because I'm looking at the studies and, you know, there was just a report
00:45:51.320 that came out from the Times of London where they surveyed a thousand young people, Gen Zers,
00:45:55.160 and found that compared to their millennial counterparts, they were overwhelmingly rejecting
00:45:59.380 porn, rejecting anonymous hookups, and valuing marriage by twice as many points as millennials do.
00:46:05.640 But I'd also note because I sit in the back row of church at the longest pew to fit the 10 high
00:46:13.100 school boys next to me who go to Seattle public schools, many of whom who have not been raised in
00:46:18.320 Christian homes who come every day, not just to the service, but to come early for the Sunday school
00:46:24.320 class where we talk about abortion and hookup culture and dating done well and the real definition of
00:46:29.720 marriage and the harms of divorce. I mean, like this is a generation that is ready for somebody to tell
00:46:35.880 them the truth, especially about moral issues. And I just don't want these mega conservative
00:46:40.960 platforms to throw away their credibility because they're not being morally clear when somebody in their own
00:46:46.780 tribe, you know, makes an announcement like this. Yeah. It's really not that hard to say. I love so
00:46:52.680 much of what Elon Musk is doing and yet I want him to come to Christ and I want him at the very least
00:46:57.960 to represent a kind of responsible fatherhood that we want in politics and the conservative movement,
00:47:03.540 someone who is so close to Trump. But just to give people a little update on what is going on,
00:47:09.300 you mentioned Ashley is now suing Elon Musk for full custody of their son. We have more information
00:47:16.780 about the fact that he has only met his son a few times and actually just weeks before she announced,
00:47:22.320 hey, I had Elon Musk's kid five months ago. We're trying to get in touch with Elon Musk to figure out
00:47:28.700 our agreement and he's not responding. She actually like tweeted at him trying to get him to respond,
00:47:33.720 which was just very tragic. We also found out that he had just texted her apparently a few weeks earlier
00:47:41.040 saying we have a legion of babies to make. I want to knock you up again. So part of me,
00:47:46.100 I know that Ashley went into this clear eye knowing what she was going to do, but I'm sad.
00:47:51.360 I'm sad for her. I'm sad for this child. She also has another child from another man.
00:47:58.520 And I feel that she is probably in a lot of distress. And then we saw Grimes, who is another
00:48:05.520 baby mama. I don't know how else to say it. Mother of Elon's baby, his, you know, the one that he
00:48:11.140 actually brings to the White House. I think they have a few kids together. Actually, one of their
00:48:16.040 children is in some kind of medical distress, according to Grimes. And she is trying to get
00:48:21.700 Elon's attention on X. She said this, please respond about our child's medical crisis in response to just
00:48:28.560 one of Elon's random posts. I am sorry to do this publicly, but it is no longer acceptable to ignore
00:48:33.840 the situation. This requires immediate attention. If you don't want to talk to me, can you please
00:48:38.620 designate or hire someone who can so that we can move forward on solving this? This is urgent
00:48:45.100 Elon. I'm not giving any details, but he won't respond to text, call, or emails and has skipped
00:48:51.360 every meeting. And our child will suffer lifelong impairment if he doesn't respond. So I need him
00:48:55.860 to effing respond. And if I have to apply public pressure, then I guess that's where we are at.
00:49:01.160 So this is what happens when you make it your responsibility to repopulate the earth with a lot
00:49:06.500 of women. Yeah. I call this modern day polygamy because what you're seeing in terms of the effect
00:49:10.860 of the children is the same. You know, obviously the polygamist that many of us, especially in the
00:49:16.200 Christian world, are familiar with is the Old Testament patriarchs. You know, Abraham and Jacob
00:49:21.700 both famously, you know, had children with two different women. And then obviously there are
00:49:25.800 situations with David, situations with Solomon, where they had multiple wives. Interestingly,
00:49:31.380 none of those households are characterized by equity and love. It is not a situation of,
00:49:37.360 oh, you know, Jacob has four different wives. So there's more love for all the kids to go around.
00:49:42.120 It wasn't like that. There was more jealousy. There was more infighting. There was more battling
00:49:46.120 over resources and attention from their father. And that's exactly what we're seeing today.
00:49:51.380 Very interestingly, you know, Elon, you know, purchased a $35 million compound because he kind of
00:49:57.700 wanted to house all of the many of the women there. I did not know that. Well, Emily Jashinsky
00:50:03.760 brought it up for me when I was in chatting with her last week. And I was like, well, same. I didn't
00:50:07.700 know about it either. It's supposed to be a secret, but it's not. And so it sounds like Grimes
00:50:12.240 has not, is not there. Zillis is the wife of his second, the second mother of his children.
00:50:19.260 I believe that she's got twins with him. Grimes has not moved in yet. Twins and another one.
00:50:23.640 And she actually also had a baby in 2024. So banner year last year for Elon.
00:50:28.440 Okay. So she has three kids with him. Oh, all right. I thought it was just Grimes
00:50:31.720 that had it. Maybe. Oh no, she, that was 2022. Hard to keep track of.
00:50:34.900 I know. Hard to keep track, which I'm sure it is for Elon as well.
00:50:37.980 Yeah. And I mean, I look at like when Ashley chose to reveal that she was the mother of the
00:50:44.060 13th child of Elon that we know of. It was on Valentine's Day when he was meeting with
00:50:49.060 the Indian prime minister and he was flanked by, um, Zillis and two of their children.
00:50:56.020 Oh, I didn't know that either. Yeah. I mean, so I'm like, well, you know, it looks like
00:51:00.640 a vine for attention, right. Or a jealousy, even among the women. So let's just say though,
00:51:07.220 that any of these women or all of these women were willing to live at this $35 million compound.
00:51:13.160 Does it mean that the kids are going to be better off? Well, studies say no. Um, studies show
00:51:18.260 that anytime unrelated adults are sharing living spaces with children, uh, incidents of abuse and
00:51:24.380 neglect increase. Now I often talk about that in the context of, um, stepfathers or mothers live
00:51:30.960 in boyfriend, you know, because we've adopted this insane, like anti-human, um, talking point that,
00:51:38.980 you know, kids don't need a biological connection with their parents. They just need to be safe and
00:51:43.600 loved. Um, and I'm like, well, then why do we have any kind of screening for adoptive parents?
00:51:47.720 It's because social workers are not idiots and they know that it takes more than intending to
00:51:52.100 parent a child to actually ensure the child's going to be safe and loved. That's why adoptive
00:51:56.420 parents have to go through screenings and vettings and background checks and fingerprints and home
00:52:00.160 studies. Um, because there is such a risk to children when they're sharing living spaces with
00:52:04.740 unrelated men and women, obviously that risk is acute when it's an unrelated man. And I tell people,
00:52:11.480 if you don't believe me, Google the words mother's boyfriend and tell me what you find.
00:52:16.360 I just saw this awful story just to your point of these twin boys, 15 year old boys,
00:52:21.800 and I won't go into all the graphic details, but they were being horrifically tortured and abused.
00:52:28.540 Awful, awful. And I go to the, I go to the article and it doesn't say stepfather right away,
00:52:36.560 but when you see the ages of the father and mother, well, these are 15 year old boys. The
00:52:40.820 mother is about 42. Okay. That checks out. The father is only 32. Hmm. That doesn't really seem
00:52:47.100 to check out. You read more. It's a stepfather. Right. And of course that doesn't mean all step
00:52:51.080 fathers are bad. I know a lot of people out there saying your stepfather saved your life. We know
00:52:54.940 that we're just heroic step parents. Yes, absolutely. And praise God for that. That is another
00:52:59.640 example of redeeming a broken situation. But statistically, kids are at risk, whether it is
00:53:06.400 adoption, surrogacy, or whatever, statistically they're at risk when they're at a home with an
00:53:12.160 unrelated male. And, you know, sociologist Brad Wilcox, who I know you've had on the show,
00:53:17.080 will just point blank tell you the most dangerous place for a child to find themselves in America is
00:53:21.600 in the home of an unrelated man left to care for the child himself. Like it is the highest risk
00:53:27.280 when it comes to predictors for child abuse. Interestingly, having other women in the home
00:53:33.080 are not good for kids either. And there was a study done called the puzzle of monogamous marriage that
00:53:37.520 studied the risks of polygamy and polyamory, which let me just be clear. What is polygamy? What is
00:53:42.920 polyamory? It is unrelated adults sharing living spaces with kids. That's what it's always going to
00:53:47.600 be the inclusion of somebody who's not biologically related to the child. That study found that
00:53:53.020 stepmothers, unrelated women were 2.4 times more likely to kill children than the biological mom.
00:54:00.860 And then even if they aren't directly abusing, there is neglect or at minimum in attendance to
00:54:08.640 what's going on with the kid. And so accidental deaths in those homes where there's unrelated adults
00:54:13.560 increased by 15 to 77 times when there's an unrelated woman on the scene. And it's just because they don't
00:54:20.540 feel the same level of obligation to the kid, right? That's not my kid. I'm watching my kids
00:54:24.800 over here. There was three Princeton economists that studied households where the woman had both
00:54:31.280 a biological child and a stepchild. And they found that the stepmom took the stepchild to the doctor
00:54:39.360 less often, buckled their seatbelts less often, spent 5% less money on food on the unrelated child,
00:54:47.920 on the stepchild. So you could frame this as sin nature and that's probably good. But evolutionary
00:54:54.820 biologists have been studying this forever. They actually have a term for it and it's called the
00:54:59.800 Cinderella effect. It is that a child who is being raised by a step parent or the boyfriend or girlfriend
00:55:05.880 of the biological parent are going to be disadvantaged in ways where they are, to put it generously,
00:55:13.180 less connected to, less invested in, and less protective of the child.
00:55:17.300 Yes. You hear that story a lot. Gosh, that is heartbreaking. And it's just,
00:55:21.740 it's another indication that science is always catching up to God. If you would just read the
00:55:26.640 very first chapter of the first book of the Bible, we'd be golden.
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00:56:44.500 One other story in the news that I want to make sure to get your thoughts on,
00:56:48.160 and this goes under the category of unknown consequences of big fertility. Female egg farm.
00:56:57.300 Oh my gosh. Yes, that is. This was crazy. But this was so awful and so completely predictable.
00:57:03.200 Yeah. Yes. Keep going. Keep going. Well, I'll just give a summary and then I'll let you go off on it. So
00:57:07.760 the increasing demand of reproductive technology fueled by a patchwork of conflicting and non-existent
00:57:13.000 regulations has unsurprisingly led to the exploitation of women and children as they are
00:57:17.800 trafficked across the borders for product and profit. So this is according to the Daily Mail,
00:57:23.140 around 100 women have been kept as slaves on a human egg farm located in the Eastern European
00:57:28.800 country of Georgia run by a Chinese criminal organization. And so these eggs are being sold
00:57:35.420 all across the world. These women being pumped with drugs, being strapped down,
00:57:40.140 their eggs extracted, I'm sure without anesthesia. That's a very painful process.
00:57:44.460 And their eggs are being sold to willing buyers, probably at a pretty low price.
00:57:49.600 So that is literally happening. That's not a conspiracy theory. That is literally happening,
00:57:53.560 literally reported. And if this is one that we know about, I guarantee this is happening around
00:57:58.000 the world. Yeah. A hundred percent. Cause I think that the woman who escaped had to buy her freedom.
00:58:01.880 Like she had to pay a certain amount of money to get off the farm. And then she came back,
00:58:06.460 reported it. She's like prostitution. Yeah. I think that they rescued a few of the other women,
00:58:09.420 but yeah, what, what do we expect, right? When you want to make a lab made baby, you need three
00:58:15.720 things. You need sperm, you need egg, and you need womb. Sperm is very easy to get to, easy to access.
00:58:23.260 That's why it tends to be much more affordable. Eggs are much harder to get to. Women typically release
00:58:31.700 one a month. And so if you want to purchase a batch of eggs, women have to go through these medically
00:58:38.640 risky processes of injecting themselves with hormones and then hyper stimulating their ovaries
00:58:43.940 and then laparoscopically extracting them. And that is why human eggs are, you know, by weight,
00:58:51.500 one of the most expensive commodities on the planet. It's very, very hard to get to. And then the third
00:58:56.680 part is the womb. And that is actually harder to get to, right? It's harder to find women who will
00:59:02.020 then rent out their bodies for nine and a half months. And so we have seen, you know, I have a Google
00:59:06.560 alert, a surrogacy Google alert that just tells me everything that's been printed in the last 24
00:59:10.940 hours using the word surrogacy. And I'll tell you what, the number of times that surrogacy and
00:59:15.860 trafficking, surrogacy and trafficking, like populate those returns is amazing to me because
00:59:22.340 there's a high demand for wombs. Not as many people want to offer their wombs. And so you do have women
00:59:27.760 that are being captured, coerced, trafficked into being surrogates or illegal surrogacy rings being run
00:59:34.260 out of Cambodia so that they can feed what is often a huge demand in China. There's now a huge
00:59:42.060 underground market of surrogacy happening in the Philippines right now. You know, there was a great
00:59:45.780 documentary that came out on that about a couple of weeks ago. Same thing, right? There's a huge demand
00:59:51.460 for these specific female aspects of reproduction. And it stuns me because it's like everything that
00:59:57.660 women have to offer, every part of their body that is so special and distinct from men, there's a market
01:00:02.120 for that. You've got prostitution, right? Which is the marketplace for the female external reproductive
01:00:08.180 organs. You have a marketplace for eggs, right? Which is sort of that very precious, like gold
01:00:13.680 commodity that we have. And then you've got a marketplace for wombs. And, you know, I've heard
01:00:18.680 John Stone Street say, you know, whenever you put a price tag on something that is priceless, you
01:00:22.480 immediately cheapen it. Right? And that's what's going on right now. There's a huge demand. Eggs are
01:00:28.180 expensive. Wombs are expensive. So of course, we're going to try to, you know, traffic and cut
01:00:32.800 the cost wherever we can in both of those areas. Yes. I remember when the initial invasion of
01:00:39.140 Ukraine happened, and there were all these stories of poor women in Ukraine were being used as
01:00:44.020 surrogates for people in America, around the world, just because people can get it for cheaper in these
01:00:48.900 desperate, poor countries where these women are, they need money. And so they're paid $30,000 to,
01:00:54.520 you know, bear this child. And then, okay, their child was born. And wait, the parents aren't coming
01:01:00.280 to get the child. Well, it's not my child. I can't afford to keep this child. So these children were
01:01:05.540 basically in these orphanages, waiting for their parents in other parts of Europe or in America or
01:01:11.200 Canada to come get them. And while it's dangerous in Ukraine, and a lot of times those parents don't
01:01:16.180 necessarily feel a connection to that child, because they haven't even been around for their
01:01:20.120 gestation. And that's still something that's happening. These children are toddlers now,
01:01:24.360 and they haven't met their parents who paid for them to be born via surrogate.
01:01:30.960 You know, we often talk about how surrogacy is the, in surrogacy, the rich buy and the poor sell.
01:01:37.580 And so you're going to find active surrogacy markets in any countries where it isn't outright banned,
01:01:42.880 where there's economically vulnerable women. So we're seeing, you know, the Philippines,
01:01:46.740 like I mentioned, Mexico is now a huge hotspot for surrogacy. But Ukraine has 25% of the global
01:01:54.640 surrogacy market. In fact, I believe one specific fertility clinic in Ukraine has 25%. So I'm sure
01:01:59.920 there's others in Ukraine too. Like, shouldn't that make you scratch your head? Yeah. If a war-torn
01:02:04.640 country where women are losing their husbands to the front, to maybe death because they were at war,
01:02:12.140 if that's the place where women are signing up to be surrogates, shouldn't that make you question
01:02:18.040 whether or not we should be doing this? Right.
01:02:20.140 I mean, yet it's not. And of course it's the kids who suffer. You know, there was a situation,
01:02:25.100 baby Bridget, that was not picked up in Ukraine because she had a disability. The parents wouldn't
01:02:30.960 come and get her. So she was left there. According to the surrogacy laws, the baby didn't belong to the
01:02:37.520 surrogate. The baby couldn't be adopted because the child was stateless. So unfortunately, you know,
01:02:43.780 she has simply had to piece a life together without her biological parents, without anybody
01:02:49.360 that's even like claiming or adopting her. I mean, it's just incredibly, it's not just that it's unjust.
01:02:54.940 It is unjust. I believe that those parents went on to have two healthy surrogate babies with somebody
01:02:59.640 else so they could take home the product that they ordered, not the damaged goods that they got with
01:03:04.140 their first attempt. Yeah. That reminds me of the woman that I had on. You probably know her story.
01:03:09.840 Her name is Brittany. I think Jennifer Law originally connected me to her. She had been a surrogate in
01:03:14.900 the past. Everything went, you know, as planned. And then she was a surrogate for two gay men and she
01:03:20.320 was diagnosed with cancer in the middle of her pregnancy. And because she had to go through
01:03:24.860 chemotherapy and the doctor said, yeah, you should probably give birth early, but we can save the baby
01:03:29.120 and save you. It's totally possible, but this will be a preterm situation. The fathers said,
01:03:34.820 we don't want a preterm baby. We, you know, don't want to deal with all of the complications of that
01:03:39.300 preterm baby. Abort this child. You have to abort this child contractually because it's not yours.
01:03:44.740 It's ours. This is our choice. And so she was kind of, you know, a little blurry on what exactly
01:03:50.300 happened. It sounded like she induced labor at an early time and that they didn't save the life of a
01:03:55.380 child because she even offered, she said, I will adopt this child. Give me this child. Someone in
01:04:00.500 my life will take care of this child. I will care for this child. And because the dads so-called
01:04:06.080 had parental rights, they had the right to say, no, we don't want to adopt this child out. We want
01:04:12.700 this child to die. The mom said, do you want to come to the hospital while they're inducing labor?
01:04:17.180 Do you want the remains of the child? No, don't talk to us again. So this child was died,
01:04:22.300 you know, was killed or died, discarded like toxic waste. And the men moved on to another
01:04:29.940 surrogate to get a quote unquote healthy child with the, you know, the surrogate mom still,
01:04:36.600 I'm sure reeling from dealing with the emotional trauma that this caused. And again, that is one
01:04:43.460 story that we know. I guarantee you every anecdote that we are telling you today happens thousands and
01:04:49.820 thousands of times, both here and abroad. Well, and even when surrogacy goes well,
01:04:54.920 there's a cost to the child. So last week, Sam Altman announced that he had a baby and everyone's
01:05:01.080 like, wait, what? He's gay? What's going on? And apparently he married his boyfriend last year.
01:05:06.660 But he said, you know, something like, welcome to the world, little boy. You came early. So you're
01:05:12.240 going to spend some time in the NICU, but I've never been so in love or something like that.
01:05:15.400 And, you know, I quote tweeted him like, welcome to the world, motherless boy. You came early
01:05:20.780 because you're the product of surrogacy. And surrogacy often results in preterm birth and
01:05:25.700 preterm labor and all of the accompanying risks that go along with a baby that is not able to
01:05:30.460 fully develop. And somebody is like, wait a second, why are surrogate born kids more likely to be
01:05:36.700 preterm? And the answer is IVF is actually a risk factor for preterm birth, right? There's something
01:05:44.040 about making a baby in a laboratory, whether it's because you are selecting the sperm and injecting
01:05:49.420 the sperm into the egg or something about the process of like exposing them to light or the
01:05:54.520 freezing or the thawing or whatever it is. But IVF babies are high risk babies. They just always are.
01:05:59.160 And they're more susceptible to preterm birth. Number two, there is something Jennifer Law has spoken
01:06:05.460 about the risk of genetic dissimilarity that when the woman is carrying a baby who's not genetically hers,
01:06:11.660 there does, that does seem to trigger some kind of immunological response of, of rejection,
01:06:17.340 or at least, you know, the pregnancy is not going to go smoothly as it should. I think that there's
01:06:23.160 also some placental development challenges that go along with surrogate pregnancies. And so like,
01:06:28.500 even if, you know, the birth, the mother is happy, the surrogate is happy, the commissioning parents
01:06:33.280 are happy. And if the child is born alive, there's still risks to the child. There's still medical risks.
01:06:37.720 Preterm births is a big one. Yep. You know, I read the other day, I did not know this,
01:06:42.980 that when IVF is used specifically for male infertility, so for whatever it is, he's,
01:06:50.080 he doesn't have enough sperm, his sperm isn't mobile. And so they're literally, you know, just
01:06:54.320 as they always do. And in vitro, they're putting the sperm and the egg together to make sure they are
01:06:58.700 conceiving. There is a 66% increase in the, in the risk of a disability, a mental disability,
01:07:07.720 and especially autism, because I'm not saying that, well, you should just get over the fact that
01:07:14.480 you're infertile, man. Hopefully there are, you know, natural ways to try to increase your fertility,
01:07:19.500 but you know, like your body is telling you something. There is a reason why that sperm
01:07:24.440 cannot get to that egg that is telling you something about your genetic abilities,
01:07:29.240 your ability to reproduce. For the people who say, trust the science, they don't believe what
01:07:34.300 science has to tell them about marriage and reproduction. So I am the mother of two high
01:07:38.840 school boys. So that means that I spend half of my time looking at Instagram reels and memes
01:07:43.400 that they send me. And, you know, one of the ones is like the picture of the sperm,
01:07:48.020 like making their way through the fallopian tube and like finally seeing the egg and then the battle.
01:07:51.840 Like, which one is good? This is a video that you have been sent. Oh my gosh. There's so many
01:07:56.260 videos like this. So many videos. Right. And it is like, okay, finally the sperm, like, and it's
01:08:01.940 always set to like Rocky music. Okay. So the sperm finally like penetrates the egg, like the new life
01:08:07.460 is created. And then it's something like, just remember you were always the product of a winning
01:08:11.860 sperm or something. But the reality is there is a sort of natural selection process that is going to
01:08:17.960 allow the fittest sperm, the strongest sperm to make it through that gauntlet of biological challenges
01:08:25.200 that the, the female body will throw up to fertilization by design. You know, there's a
01:08:31.720 good reason to not have us determine which sperm is injected into the egg, but allow some level of
01:08:38.200 fitness to guide that. And like you said, sometimes, you know, I had woman, woman comment on
01:08:43.480 one of the millions of IVF posts that happened. And she said, you know, everybody, every woman that I
01:08:48.980 know, her case, this isn't the cases that I know of, but she said almost all the people that I know
01:08:54.420 who used IVF, the women were extremely overweight and fertility was a problem for them. And we do know
01:09:00.780 that things like obesity can be a hindrance to fertility, to conception. And so it just speaks to,
01:09:06.940 and I think that that has been some of the objection to the Trump executive order,
01:09:10.260 especially from the people who are on the Maha train, is they're like, why aren't we looking
01:09:15.240 at the underlying causes of infertility, right? Why is it that infertility is such a big problem
01:09:20.840 today? Why is it that sperm count has dropped 50% for men overall in the last 50 years? And the answer
01:09:27.760 is there's a lot of environmental causes, a lot of pollutants, a lot of chemicals in our diet,
01:09:32.760 in our environment that is making it harder for people to conceive naturally. And so if we're going to
01:09:38.240 do Maha, let's do Maha, but let's not circumvent. Instead of saying, okay, the infertility is a
01:09:44.020 blinking light on the dashboard of, of reproductive health saying there's something wrong here.
01:09:48.780 You're just circumventing, you're turning the light off, right? You're going to like make that
01:09:52.740 happen outside of the natural processes. Why don't we really investigate and heal the problem to begin
01:09:57.240 with instead of fueling this industry that rampantly victimizes children? Yes. And we've had women on
01:10:02.800 this show who have heard from their doctors, your only chance at getting pregnant is IVF.
01:10:06.740 And they just didn't take that for an answer and they dug deeper. And in some cases I have friends
01:10:12.660 who truly they can't get pregnant. And so they've gone the adoption route, which is just beautiful.
01:10:17.140 But then I've had others like the guest I had on my show who went the natural fertility route and it
01:10:22.280 took longer. They had to dig deeper. They had to make lifestyle choices, both her and her husband and
01:10:28.060 all kinds of digging that sometimes is expensive because unfortunately insurance doesn't cover that.
01:10:32.520 Like if we're going to expand insurance coverage, maybe let's move in the functional direction.
01:10:37.440 But they were able to conceive a child that they were told by doctors they were never able to conceive.
01:10:43.440 So I'm not saying, Hey, if you're infertile, sorry, just live with it. Now, maybe that is God's plan
01:10:49.860 for you not to have biological children, but there could be other solutions that don't pose a health,
01:10:56.360 a health risk to you because IVF also increases the chances of things like breast cancer in women.
01:11:02.880 Well, we don't know a whole lot about what IVF and egg extraction causes women because big
01:11:08.640 fertility is not studying it. Like it's actually hard for women to consent to the risks that go along
01:11:13.800 to, for example, donating eggs because we don't, they're like, well, there's no known risks because
01:11:18.540 you have not looked.
01:11:19.620 Well, because the same people that are getting paid from extracting the eggs would also be the
01:11:23.640 people that we need to do the research. Yeah. Right. Absolutely. Yeah. So I, I'm glad you brought
01:11:28.300 up restorative reproductive medicine, natural procreative technologies, like look it up now
01:11:32.820 pro technologies. I mean, if you're struggling with infertility, um, put your finger on the source
01:11:38.220 of the problem. There's a variety of different reasons why somebody might not be able to conceive.
01:11:41.820 And some of them are treatable. Yeah. A lot of them are treatable. You have friends that made those
01:11:46.040 lifestyle changes, eventually got pregnant. I've got several friends who got pregnant very, very quickly
01:11:50.640 because they're like, Oh, you don't have, you know, I'm going to, I'm going to make something
01:11:55.460 up. Yeah. Right. You don't have the right level of estrogen. You know, here's a supplement you
01:11:58.940 could take. Here's something that you could do to like equalize, get yourself to the right level.
01:12:02.480 And then pregnancy was fairly easy for a couple of their kids. Um, and it is simply because there's
01:12:08.300 not a lot of incentive for fertility doctors to actually seek and resolve the underlying fertility
01:12:12.420 issues. If they were, they would lose 12 to $25,000 by you being their customer, probably a
01:12:20.440 repeat customer with IVF success rates. And so don't take their advice, go the natural route,
01:12:27.220 see a doctor that actually wants to identify, resolve and heal your underlying fertility issues
01:12:32.640 if possible. And depending on the problem, you might see success rates at double what IVF is promising
01:12:39.720 you. Yes. Especially in the case where someone is, maybe they're starting to have a child at 35.
01:12:45.800 Maybe it's not because of like feminism and girl bossing. Maybe that's just the time that God,
01:12:50.940 you know, brought you your husband, but that is not infertility. It is simply how the female
01:12:56.420 body works. But also people need to hear that your rates of success, your chance of success in IVF,
01:13:03.760 the older you are, they go closer and closer to zero. Even if you do IVF, if you're 38,
01:13:09.720 years old, you're going to have a really hard time getting pregnant. I think it's better all
01:13:14.160 around, obviously ethically and morally, but for your health and for your chances of getting pregnant
01:13:17.860 to go the natural route, it's going to be harder to get pregnant no matter what the older you are,
01:13:22.940 but at least choose something that has no moral risk and is better for your body.
01:13:26.800 It's going to make you healthier generally. Anyway, I'm a lot of people like, what are we doing
01:13:31.340 with this infertility crisis? And I'm like, yes, infertility is a problem. Obviously like male
01:13:36.160 fertility has been really well documented in terms of that struggle, but generally we don't
01:13:40.800 necessarily have a fertility problem. We have a, you are getting married too late and choosing to
01:13:44.960 have children too late problem. Women have a very small window of easy pregnancy. It is late teens
01:13:50.920 to early thirties. And unfortunately, a lot of the narratives that we are selling young women these
01:13:55.940 days is to use that prime childbearing time to advance your career, to find yourself, to go to grad
01:14:02.560 school. And, um, I'm not saying that you shouldn't do those things. I'm not saying that you shouldn't
01:14:06.380 take a trip to Italy or whatever, but if you think that you're going to put off childbearing until you
01:14:11.680 are 33, 35, 37, 39, you might be working against your own body. You know, I tell young women, you can
01:14:18.960 have it all. You can have a marriage, you can have career, but you can't have it all at once.
01:14:24.340 Yeah. And if you don't do marriage and kids first, if you can choose, a lot of women can't,
01:14:28.180 a lot of women haven't found Mr. Right. Um, a lot of women are struggling with genuine fertility
01:14:32.800 issues, but if you can choose, you've got to do marriage and kids first. You have to do that first.
01:14:39.640 I wish we had started earlier. Like we got married at 23 as soon as we could after meeting each other,
01:14:45.460 but waited a few years until we had kids. And obviously I'm so thankful for every specific
01:14:50.360 child that we have with their specific genetic makeup. But I'm like, wait, why did we wait three
01:14:55.680 years? Why did we wait those three years of like prime fertility to, and you know, but you never
01:15:02.160 hear, I mean, I feel like you don't hear that that much. I'm thankful for our early years of marriage,
01:15:06.960 but it's like, it'd be awesome to have like three more kids too. So anyway, well, Katie, thank you so
01:15:12.360 much. Are there any parting thoughts, any final words that you'd like to give? Oh my gosh, that is
01:15:16.840 quite an invitation. Yes. Well, where can people find you support? Oh yeah. No, that's great.
01:15:21.800 Then before us.com go subscribe. We have some really, really big things that are going to be
01:15:27.600 coming out. Big interviews coming out in the next couple of weeks. Um, we have a lot of projects
01:15:31.500 that we're working on for the first time. We have policy recommendations for state level lawmakers
01:15:35.780 so that we can start to, um, do what we can to keep big fertility in check state by state,
01:15:41.780 but also working to retake lost marriage ground. Like I'm tired of playing defense on all of these
01:15:47.900 different critical areas of the social fabric of marriage and parenthood and families.
01:15:52.100 I want to go on the offense on behalf of children. I want people to start speaking up and boldly
01:15:57.940 advancing the rights of kids, both in their personal lives and in the policy world. So I guess
01:16:02.700 that's what I'd say. Like come and subscribe, um, find us on all the social media. Um, I'm on Twitter
01:16:07.280 too much X too much. We should have an intervention there, but yeah, we'd love to see you over there
01:16:13.120 if you're on the socials. Okay. Thank you so much, Katie. Yeah.