Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 1162 ｜ SkinnyTok, the iPad Pacifier & Paula White’s New Scam

00:00:01.000 Prosperity preacher and Trump advisor Paula White is at it again.

00:00:05.980 Oh my goodness, we've got a biblical response to her latest heresy.

00:00:11.460 Also, Jonathan Haidt has been posting some very troubling statistics on social media about kids and technology use.

00:00:19.840 How can we solve this problem? Because it is solvable.

00:00:23.620 And then at the end of this episode, we've got a segment on a very troubling trend on TikTok called Skinny Talk.

00:00:31.820 What is this and what does it mean for your daughters?

00:00:34.860 We will make sure you parents know what's up and what to do.

00:00:39.520 This episode is brought to you by our friends at Good Ranchers.

00:00:42.460 Go to goodranchers.com. Use code Allie at checkout. That's goodranchers.com, code Allie.

00:00:53.620 Hey guys, welcome to Relatable. Happy Thursday. Hope everyone is having a wonderful week.

00:01:01.860 We are almost to Friday. All right.

00:01:03.920 Yesterday when I announced some of the speakers for Share the Arrows, I did not know quite yet.

00:01:11.320 We were almost there, but that Taylor Dukes will be added to the lineup.

00:01:15.620 And so Taylor Dukes is another speaker at Share the Arrows.

00:01:18.800 We're doing something new this year.

00:01:20.340 We are doing a health panel where we will talk about how to live healthy lifestyles,

00:01:27.400 both at home, outside of our home, not just physically, materially, but also spiritually,

00:01:33.840 and how to balance that because that can be a whole world of legalism in itself.

00:01:38.400 And yet we do understand that we are supposed to steward our bodies as dwelling places for the Holy Spirit.

00:01:43.680 And so we will be having a very rich, interesting discussion about that at Share the Arrows.

00:01:48.400 In addition to having Elisa Childers and Katie Faust, you know those two are going to bring it.

00:01:54.240 Francesca Battistelli is going to be leading us in worship yet again.

00:01:59.920 And we also have some other speakers we haven't announced.

00:02:02.480 Also, Ginger Vuolo will be on stage and she will be giving a powerful testimony too.

00:02:07.380 So apologetics, theology, training, there will be motherhood conversation.

00:02:14.900 Those are the speakers we haven't announced quite yet and just so much.

00:02:19.140 I'm so excited.

00:02:19.920 So make sure you go to sharethearrows.com and get your tickets if you have not already.

00:02:24.680 All right.

00:02:25.160 Got quite a few things to talk about today.

00:02:26.820 We've got a new fun segment at the end with one of the Gen Z people that work on the show or like work on other shows here at Blaze TV.

00:02:39.100 And she is awesome.

00:02:40.000 She's going to be lending her insight into this TikTok trend that we really need to know about, especially as parents.

00:02:47.480 But first, let's talk some theology.

00:02:50.660 This is about Paula White.

00:02:52.660 Paula White is a spiritual advisor to President Trump.

00:02:57.620 She is now the White House faith office leader.

00:03:04.280 We did a whole episode on Paula White.

00:03:07.340 You can go back and listen to that.

00:03:09.120 Why I think she's extremely problematic.

00:03:11.240 Why I'm concerned about her having this kind of position of influence.

00:03:16.080 Even while, of course, I continue to hope that the White House is successful in all of its good endeavors.

00:03:24.620 And any good goal that even her faith office has that actually is in alignment with Scripture, I hope they're effective in accomplishing that.

00:03:35.000 But more than anything, I want Paula White to repent of the false prosperity gospel that she not only believes herself, but also that she has propagated to millions of people around the world for many years.

00:03:50.740 And most recently, she did some kind of special or commercial where she encourages her viewers to, quote unquote, honor God during Passover.

00:04:01.640 And in return, they can expect seven special blessings from God, including a personal angel, physical healing and prosperity.

00:04:11.700 And then later in her sermon, and this is very common with these prosperity preachers, she says, you should offer $1,000 to me and to my ministry, to Paula White and what she is in charge of.

00:04:28.160 And she indicates, seems to indicate that these offerings will contribute to the blessing.

00:04:34.040 So here is a clip from her latest commercial special, Sat One.

00:04:38.680 And I believe that when you honor God on Passover, starting on April 12th at sundown through Good Friday on the 18th and concluding on Easter Sunday, you can receive these seven supernatural blessings for you and your house.

00:04:52.700 According to Exodus 23, God will assign an angel to you.

00:04:57.180 He'll be an enemy to your enemies.

00:04:59.280 He'll give you prosperity.

00:05:00.920 He'll take sickness away from you.

00:05:03.080 He will give you long life.

00:05:04.500 He'll bring increase in inheritance.

00:05:06.960 And he'll give a special year of blessing.

00:05:09.140 For your special Passover offering of $1,000 or more as the Holy Spirit leads, you will also receive the beautiful 10-inch Waterford Crystal Cross.

00:05:18.600 So this was on her YouTube channel.

00:05:21.540 And you might laugh at this and you might think, how could anyone buy into something so gimmicky?

00:05:27.800 But I promise you have people in your life, especially older people, who have dwindling savings, but who believe this, that if they sow a seed of faith, that's often the language used, then God will repay them with some kind of blessing.

00:05:44.860 Whether it's a relationship help, or whether it's a promotion at work, or whether it's physical healing from one of their ailments.

00:05:54.660 And they put their hope in this, that God is some kind of genie, that if I do this, he will do this.

00:06:02.160 And she claims to be getting this idea from Exodus 23.

00:06:09.500 Exodus 23 is a passage in which Moses is giving instruction and laws to the Israelites about their conduct, about how they are to honor the Sabbath, how they are to celebrate in their festivals.

00:06:24.920 He is also telling them about God's promise to help conquer Canaan.

00:06:29.400 Behold, I send an angel before you to guard you on the way and to bring you to the place that I have prepared.

00:06:36.140 That's verse 20 of chapter 23.

00:06:38.260 And God goes on to say through Moses,

00:06:41.400 You shall serve the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water.

00:06:45.860 I will take sickness away from among you.

00:06:48.740 None shall miscarry or be barren in your land.

00:06:51.800 I will fulfill the number of your days.

00:06:54.380 I will send my terror before you and will throw into confusion all the people against whom you shall come.

00:07:00.820 And I will make all of your enemies turn their backs on you.

00:07:04.980 So, while God is the same, Jesus Christ, who is God, is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

00:07:12.760 We see that in Hebrews 13.8.

00:07:14.760 We can also read in John 1 that New Testament Jesus is God.

00:07:19.440 He is the God that was there in the beginning.

00:07:21.860 Nothing that was made was made without Jesus, without the fullness of this triune God.

00:07:28.320 So, there are principles and characteristics of God that we can see in the Old Testament that we know are still true today.

00:07:34.880 But we have to have the discernment, the wisdom, to be able to see what was true at a particular time, at a particular place, for a particular people, and what is true for us today.

00:07:47.780 And it certainly takes some navigation and, in some cases, expert interpretation to be able to understand that.

00:07:56.480 But really, it also just takes reading comprehension, knowing Scripture, and reading things in context.

00:08:03.100 We can deduce from this passage that God is a God who cares about how we worship Him, that He has certain regulations for His people, and that if they honored Him, He would do certain things.

00:08:16.840 What we do not see is that these exact instructions apply to Christians today and guarantee us those same blessings.

00:08:26.820 Because, see, Jesus has become our cleansing.

00:08:30.460 He has become what sets us apart.

00:08:32.580 That is why Christians today don't do all of the things that the ancient Israelites did, because we don't have to follow the ceremonial laws anymore.

00:08:42.080 Because Jesus became our sacrifice.

00:08:45.080 He became our ceremonial cleansing.

00:08:48.500 He became the fulfillment of the promise.

00:08:51.280 And so, while these people are going towards the promised land, that was really just a foreshadowing, a precursor of what God's people, through Christ, will get one day because of Jesus' sacrifice on our behalf.

00:09:08.900 And that is eternity with Him in heaven, in the new heavens, and the new earth.

00:09:16.120 And so, this is not a passage that we can apply directly to the Christian life today because this was for a particular people at a particular time.

00:09:27.840 Again, we can apply some principles, characteristics of God to today, but we cannot apply all of these details to the lives of Christians today.

00:09:36.680 I think that's obvious.

00:09:37.840 Like, if you walked around a city with a wall seven days in a row, that wall isn't necessarily going to fall down like the walls of Jericho did.

00:09:47.180 We have to be able to read with discernment and pray for the wisdom that James 5 guarantees us if we ask for it.

00:09:55.500 And as soon as I saw this video, which is just absolutely money-grabbing, it's about selfishness, it's about self-enrichment, which is just absolutely evil,

00:10:07.180 will not only lead those who propagate this to hell, but it will also lead those who believe this kind of prosperity gospel to hell.

00:10:13.880 I thought of Galatians 2.16 and really how this is, it's not just convincing people that giving money is going to guarantee something in return,

00:10:25.320 but it's also trying to enslave people to the law.

00:10:30.740 That if you do this, if you follow all these stipulations and regulations, honor the Passover.

00:10:36.960 I mean, Christians don't even talk like that.

00:10:39.060 But if you honor the Passover the way that the Jews do or the Jews did, then God will do all of these things for you.

00:10:45.460 I'm reminded of Galatians.

00:10:47.400 And Paul, in the book of Galatians, really does not want these Christian converts to believe that in order to be good Christians,

00:10:55.420 they continue, they have to follow the Jewish law.

00:10:59.280 Galatians 2.16.

00:11:00.500 Yet we know that a person is not justified by works of the law, but through faith in Jesus Christ.

00:11:08.560 So we also have believed in Christ Jesus in order to be justified by faith in Christ and not by works of the law,

00:11:16.500 because by the works of the law, no one will be justified.

00:11:21.160 Do you hear that?

00:11:22.020 You will not be justified by works of the law.

00:11:25.980 You will not be justified before God, made clean, made worthy, made right before God,

00:11:34.840 because you honor the Passover the way the Old Testament says that the ancient Israelites did.

00:11:42.760 Now, that does not mean that we should not obey God.

00:11:47.460 That doesn't mean that God has no rules for us.

00:11:49.740 Of course he does.

00:11:51.040 We see that throughout scripture.

00:11:52.520 We still abide by the moral law that we see in the Old Testament, because Jesus doubled down on the moral law,

00:12:00.140 whereas he fulfilled the ceremonial law by becoming our cleansing.

00:12:03.760 When it came to the moral law, he didn't say, okay, we don't believe that anymore.

00:12:07.500 He actually said, okay, you have heard it said that you shouldn't murder anyone,

00:12:11.360 but I say to you, if you hate someone in your heart, that's similar to murder.

00:12:14.400 So he didn't do away with that law.

00:12:16.480 He actually said, it's not just about your actions, it's about your heart,

00:12:19.620 which we read throughout scripture, especially in Galatians, that that starts with faith.

00:12:24.180 And it is by grace, through faith, that someone is justified, not by the works of the law.

00:12:31.060 So be freed by that.

00:12:33.720 I also read, just in light of the whole prosperity gospel, that if you do this,

00:12:38.820 then God, like a genie, will do this for you.

00:12:41.880 So Philippians 4, 12 through 13, most of us who grew up in the church,

00:12:45.880 we probably had some kind of like soccer jersey that said Philippians 4, 13 on it.

00:12:50.020 But in context, it's really a lot more beautiful than if you pray to God,

00:12:54.200 then he will help you score a soccer goal.

00:12:56.760 Verse 12, I have learned in whatever situation, actually, that's verse 11.

00:13:01.120 I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.

00:13:03.900 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound, Paul says.

00:13:09.080 In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger,

00:13:15.440 abundance and need.

00:13:17.200 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

00:13:22.660 So that's the prize.

00:13:24.940 And the book of Philippians beautifully lays this out,

00:13:28.420 especially in the first chapter of Philippians,

00:13:30.740 that Christ is the prize, to live is Christ, and to die is gain.

00:13:36.200 That in whatever circumstance we have, when things are really hard,

00:13:40.960 when we are going without, when it feels like nothing will ever get better,

00:13:46.180 and when things are really good and really easy and really abundant,

00:13:50.580 the prize, the satisfaction is Christ himself.

00:13:54.740 If Christ never did anything else for us,

00:13:57.160 if God never gave us any other material blessing and all he had ever done for us

00:14:01.940 was send his son to die for us and defeat death on the third day,

00:14:06.480 that would be enough to say, hallelujah, praise the Lord, God is good.

00:14:11.380 And then I thought of John 9 as I was reading this passage the other day,

00:14:15.140 and it made me think of my conversation with Kostihan,

00:14:17.600 and we'll link that if you haven't listened to it.

00:14:19.700 But he talks so poignantly about the dangers of the prosperity gospel

00:14:24.520 and the beauty of the real gospel.

00:14:26.740 And then a few days later, I was reading this passage.

00:14:29.300 This is verse 1 through 3 of John 9.

00:14:31.640 As Jesus passed by, he saw a man blind from birth,

00:14:34.920 and his disciples asked him,

00:14:37.000 Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?

00:14:41.960 Jesus answered, it was not that this man sinned or his parents,

00:14:45.840 but that the works of God might be displayed in him.

00:14:50.100 And then God heals him.

00:14:52.820 Jesus heals him right there, and this man goes on praising God

00:14:56.780 and telling people the testimony of his healing.

00:15:00.320 And there you see the works of the power of God

00:15:03.540 are being displayed in his testimony.

00:15:06.560 And so Jesus is saying he is not being punished

00:15:09.460 because of his own sin or the sin of his ancestors,

00:15:13.300 and what I'm about to do is not a reward for good deeds.

00:15:17.200 This is for the glory of God.

00:15:20.000 And we can remember that in our own difficulty,

00:15:22.160 in our own sickness,

00:15:23.160 because the prosperity gospel will make you think

00:15:25.780 that you have done something wrong.

00:15:28.420 And that is why you or your child

00:15:30.540 is going through something hard.

00:15:32.100 You have some kind of unconfessed sin,

00:15:33.860 or maybe you didn't trust God enough,

00:15:35.460 or maybe you didn't pray hard enough.

00:15:37.360 But we hear from Jesus that in this world,

00:15:39.780 you will have trouble,

00:15:41.620 but take heart, I have overcome the world.

00:15:43.840 Again, Christ is the prize.

00:15:47.200 And so remember this.

00:15:50.600 Whenever you hear these peddlers of the prosperity gospel,

00:15:53.360 because I hear people say,

00:15:54.320 well, they've done good.

00:15:55.360 They have this many people in their congregations.

00:15:58.240 Look at how many followers they have.

00:15:59.840 Look at how close she is to power to President Trump.

00:16:02.620 Maybe we shouldn't criticize her

00:16:04.400 because they must be doing something right.

00:16:07.600 Do not use worldly indicators of favor

00:16:11.600 as a test for someone's obedience.

00:16:15.260 People who might look like they are failing

00:16:19.140 by the world's standards,

00:16:20.480 they are obscure,

00:16:21.680 they don't have any followers,

00:16:23.360 they don't have any fame,

00:16:24.700 they don't have any fortune,

00:16:27.340 they might be the most successful in God's sight

00:16:31.480 simply because of their unseen,

00:16:33.840 unsung obedience and courage

00:16:36.760 in following the Lord.

00:16:39.000 So pray for Paula White,

00:16:40.680 but pray for every single person

00:16:42.260 that has ever listened to her and believed her.

00:16:45.040 These are heretical teachings

00:16:46.400 that lead straight to hell.

00:16:48.560 But the gospel of Jesus,

00:16:50.300 the truth that he is enough for us,

00:16:53.940 that he is our contentment and salvation

00:16:55.840 and satisfaction,

00:16:56.760 that will really set you free.

00:16:59.480 All right.

00:17:00.480 We've got another story I wanted to get to today.

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00:18:34.120 All right.

00:18:36.060 What I'm about to talk about

00:18:37.300 is not a new story

00:18:38.720 and it's not even a new post.

00:18:40.880 I saw the post just the other day

00:18:43.200 and I realized that it had been posted

00:18:46.480 actually a couple weeks ago

00:18:48.320 by Jonathan Haidt.

00:18:49.860 And most of you know who he is

00:18:51.980 because he is the author

00:18:54.180 of the bestselling book,

00:18:56.940 The Anxious Generation.

00:18:58.200 I mean, this has been on

00:18:59.860 the New York Times bestseller list.

00:19:01.980 I don't know.

00:19:02.520 I think for over a year

00:19:04.100 at this point,

00:19:04.800 at least maybe years.

00:19:07.000 I mean, parents are just

00:19:08.020 eating this information up

00:19:09.500 because we all have this feeling

00:19:11.480 that, okay, something is wrong.

00:19:13.820 Something might be wrong with us.

00:19:16.200 Something might be wrong

00:19:17.160 with our parents' generation.

00:19:18.580 Something's definitely wrong

00:19:19.500 with the younger generations.

00:19:20.980 And that problem is

00:19:21.700 that everyone's really anxious.

00:19:23.300 Everyone's really overstimulated.

00:19:24.960 We don't have an attention span.

00:19:26.760 We're not satisfied

00:19:27.700 with simple pleasures anymore.

00:19:29.560 We seem dumber than we used to be.

00:19:33.520 We can't work as hard anymore.

00:19:35.380 We can't stay on task.

00:19:37.300 And no one seems happier.

00:19:38.760 Why?

00:19:39.360 We have all of these wonderful luxuries.

00:19:41.340 We have access to the best

00:19:42.820 and easiest things in the world

00:19:44.740 that make life fun

00:19:47.380 and make life easy.

00:19:49.180 And yet,

00:19:50.840 everyone seems really unhappy

00:19:52.520 and really on edge.

00:19:54.500 And so,

00:19:55.100 he wrote this book

00:19:56.280 called The Anxious Generation,

00:19:58.160 which talks about a lot of things,

00:19:59.800 but he focuses on

00:20:01.480 the detriment of technology

00:20:05.320 to our kids

00:20:06.900 and the negative impact

00:20:09.240 that technology addiction

00:20:12.040 is having on these developing minds.

00:20:15.680 And it is way more prevalent

00:20:18.600 than we think.

00:20:20.020 My kids,

00:20:20.460 my oldest,

00:20:21.520 is almost six.

00:20:23.900 And so,

00:20:24.320 I see a lot of other kids,

00:20:25.840 you know,

00:20:26.300 my kids' age

00:20:27.960 and I did not realize

00:20:30.920 how pervasive

00:20:33.480 this addiction to technology is.

00:20:35.760 And I'm not just talking about TV.

00:20:38.080 Maybe that was it

00:20:38.920 when we were young,

00:20:40.160 but I'm talking about kids,

00:20:42.020 my kids' age,

00:20:43.380 that have basically unfettered access

00:20:46.140 to iPads,

00:20:47.840 to tablets,

00:20:49.080 to phones,

00:20:50.480 to video games,

00:20:51.920 to different devices

00:20:53.280 that are objectively

00:20:55.280 making their brains mush.

00:20:57.900 So,

00:20:58.340 listen to some of these statistics

00:21:00.080 in this post

00:21:01.040 that I saw

00:21:02.040 on Jonathan Haidt's Instagram.

00:21:04.060 This is from a report

00:21:05.160 from the Common Sense Consensus,

00:21:08.440 media used by kids

00:21:09.840 zero to eight.

00:21:11.440 Okay,

00:21:11.660 zero to eight.

00:21:12.360 That's my kids' age range.

00:21:14.860 Here's what it says.

00:21:16.280 Media used by kids

00:21:17.340 zero to eight

00:21:18.120 advances a long-running research series.

00:21:20.840 So that's the title of it.

00:21:21.700 A long-running research series

00:21:22.720 that examines trends

00:21:23.800 in the media consumption

00:21:24.720 of young children,

00:21:26.020 providing insights

00:21:26.880 into the role

00:21:27.600 that technology plays

00:21:28.580 from the crib to the classroom.

00:21:30.120 The last zero to eight census

00:21:31.380 was conducted in early 2020,

00:21:33.220 just before the COVID pandemic,

00:21:35.200 which means that this new report

00:21:36.420 offers a unique

00:21:37.200 post-pandemic examination

00:21:38.540 of changes in children's

00:21:40.560 media use and habits

00:21:41.920 over this time period.

00:21:43.620 So here are the key findings.

00:21:46.380 By age two,

00:21:48.040 40% of children

00:21:50.900 have their own tablet.

00:21:54.400 I have an 18-month-old.

00:21:57.360 She doesn't know

00:21:58.400 what to do with the tablet.

00:21:59.660 In fact,

00:22:00.080 if I gave her my iPad,

00:22:01.560 she would probably

00:22:02.480 throw it in the fireplace.

00:22:04.600 She would definitely break it,

00:22:07.060 have no idea

00:22:07.860 what to do with it.

00:22:08.960 By age four,

00:22:09.960 more than half of children

00:22:12.240 have their own tablet.

00:22:14.000 60% of children

00:22:16.040 by age four

00:22:17.100 have their own tablet.

00:22:19.300 Now,

00:22:20.160 let me say

00:22:21.220 we don't know everything

00:22:22.580 about how often

00:22:24.440 these kids

00:22:24.980 who have their own tablet

00:22:26.240 use it, okay?

00:22:27.820 So this could be

00:22:28.760 they have their own tablet,

00:22:30.360 but their parent

00:22:31.040 lets them use it once a week.

00:22:32.580 They have their own tablet,

00:22:34.140 but their parent

00:22:34.720 only allows them

00:22:35.700 to use it

00:22:36.200 on long road trips, okay?

00:22:38.040 So I will say that

00:22:39.020 we don't know

00:22:39.780 that these,

00:22:41.020 all 60%

00:22:41.840 of these children,

00:22:42.800 100% of these,

00:22:43.940 60% of these children

00:22:45.220 are using their tablets

00:22:46.600 every day.

00:22:47.260 So we can calm down

00:22:48.200 about that.

00:22:48.940 By age eight,

00:22:49.920 one in four children

00:22:50.720 have their own cell phone.

00:22:52.360 Now that is wild to me.

00:22:54.540 What is an eight-year-old

00:22:56.720 doing with a cell phone?

00:22:58.720 What is a seven-year-old

00:22:59.860 doing with a cell phone?

00:23:01.180 Where are they going?

00:23:02.540 They're not going to the mall.

00:23:04.180 They're not going

00:23:04.900 to the movies.

00:23:06.240 What are they doing

00:23:07.160 with a cell phone?

00:23:08.640 How do they even know

00:23:09.720 to have a cell phone?

00:23:10.840 Among children

00:23:12.680 who have their own phones,

00:23:14.580 80% have a smartphone

00:23:16.700 that can go online,

00:23:18.320 use apps,

00:23:18.980 and play videos.

00:23:20.280 Guys,

00:23:20.780 I have a hard time

00:23:21.760 having self-control

00:23:23.680 with this device

00:23:25.220 and stopping myself

00:23:26.780 from scrolling

00:23:27.900 and just going down

00:23:29.440 the rabbit hole

00:23:30.180 of different posts

00:23:31.160 and different videos.

00:23:32.900 And I am a full-fledged adult

00:23:34.900 with a frontal lobe

00:23:36.820 who understands time,

00:23:38.400 who understands consequences,

00:23:40.020 and still this thing

00:23:42.120 can get the better of me.

00:23:43.480 I just can't imagine

00:23:44.640 a child

00:23:45.640 with an undeveloped brain

00:23:48.280 being able

00:23:49.960 or being expected

00:23:51.480 to stop themselves,

00:23:52.860 not just when it comes to time,

00:23:54.380 but what they are seeing.

00:23:56.480 They don't even know

00:23:57.740 that what they will click on

00:23:59.080 could lead them

00:23:59.760 to watch pornography

00:24:00.920 or see something disturbing

00:24:03.100 that is going to be seared

00:24:04.460 into their memory

00:24:05.420 or give them nightmares.

00:24:07.880 They just don't know.

00:24:08.760 19% of those

00:24:11.220 one in four children

00:24:12.120 under eight

00:24:12.760 who have their own cell phone

00:24:14.100 have, you know,

00:24:16.280 kind of like a dumb phone,

00:24:17.580 and only 3%

00:24:18.520 have like an absolute

00:24:19.920 dumb phone.

00:24:21.840 So, vast majority

00:24:22.960 of those kids

00:24:24.040 zero to eight

00:24:24.960 that have a phone

00:24:25.720 have an iPhone.

00:24:27.120 Overall, 51% of children

00:24:28.940 age eight and younger

00:24:29.900 have their own

00:24:31.140 mobile device

00:24:32.100 of some kind.

00:24:33.540 About one in five children

00:24:34.940 under age eight

00:24:36.020 use mobile devices

00:24:37.000 for emotional regulation,

00:24:39.760 meal times,

00:24:40.940 or to fall asleep.

00:24:42.700 23% use screens

00:24:44.520 while eating at home.

00:24:46.560 Excuse me.

00:24:47.540 23%.

00:24:48.020 20% watch or play

00:24:49.620 on a device

00:24:50.200 every night

00:24:51.000 or most nights

00:24:51.800 to fall asleep.

00:24:52.520 I'm not talking

00:24:54.780 about 13-year-olds.

00:24:55.880 Again, I'm talking

00:24:56.500 about six-year-olds here.

00:24:58.820 I mean, this just

00:24:59.440 absolutely

00:25:00.460 breaks my heart.

00:25:02.580 And I am

00:25:03.280 by no means

00:25:04.300 am I saying

00:25:05.020 that my husband

00:25:05.560 and I are perfect parents

00:25:06.940 or that we have

00:25:07.620 never made a mistake

00:25:08.520 or we've never

00:25:09.440 had to course correct.

00:25:11.680 Of course,

00:25:12.420 every single parent

00:25:13.720 has different challenges,

00:25:15.420 different things

00:25:15.920 that they have

00:25:16.500 just done excellently

00:25:17.740 and different things

00:25:18.720 that they have

00:25:19.160 not done well.

00:25:20.000 And maybe you're a parent

00:25:21.020 who you were

00:25:22.000 making this mistake

00:25:23.040 and you realized

00:25:24.220 the bad effect

00:25:25.880 this was having

00:25:26.540 on your family

00:25:27.260 and you said,

00:25:27.940 okay,

00:25:28.660 like we're not

00:25:29.300 going to do that anymore

00:25:30.060 and I really respect that.

00:25:31.900 But just imagine

00:25:33.080 what you are doing

00:25:34.080 to the mind

00:25:34.900 of a child

00:25:35.760 who is dependent

00:25:38.800 upon a personal device

00:25:41.400 to stop crying,

00:25:43.120 to be patient,

00:25:45.000 to quell boredom,

00:25:46.800 or to fall asleep.

00:25:48.200 You are creating an addict.

00:25:51.100 It is important for kids

00:25:52.540 and Jonathan Haidt

00:25:53.460 talks about this a lot.

00:25:54.260 It is important

00:25:54.760 for kids to be bored.

00:25:56.440 Trust me,

00:25:56.780 I know like how

00:25:57.920 aggravating it is

00:25:59.940 when your child

00:26:00.980 who has all these toys

00:26:02.040 and so many fun things to do,

00:26:03.620 a play set in the backyard

00:26:04.500 tells you that they're bored.

00:26:05.960 What I have found

00:26:07.040 and here's the thing

00:26:08.260 is that this is hard

00:26:10.160 and that's what I think

00:26:11.620 a lot of parents

00:26:12.300 are avoiding.

00:26:13.040 They want to avoid

00:26:13.800 the hard parts of parenting,

00:26:15.440 the parts that take

00:26:16.460 like work

00:26:17.240 and patience

00:26:17.800 and self-control.

00:26:18.880 And again,

00:26:19.520 imperfect person here

00:26:20.620 saying all of this

00:26:21.440 and I'm saying this

00:26:22.120 from experience

00:26:22.840 that when I get through

00:26:25.100 the initial annoyance

00:26:26.460 of hearing my children

00:26:27.520 say that they're bored

00:26:28.620 and I simply

00:26:29.960 don't change anything,

00:26:32.080 I don't turn on the TV,

00:26:33.440 I don't give them anything,

00:26:35.040 they will find something to do.

00:26:37.060 Now,

00:26:37.820 sometimes I have to sacrifice

00:26:39.480 like clean clothes for that.

00:26:41.600 There,

00:26:41.980 something to do

00:26:42.680 might be going to play

00:26:44.120 with the water hose

00:26:45.160 outside

00:26:45.680 and getting themselves messy

00:26:48.520 and I might have to be okay

00:26:50.460 with that.

00:26:51.340 But again,

00:26:51.880 that is accepting

00:26:52.760 that the right thing to do

00:26:54.580 in most situations

00:26:55.880 in parenting

00:26:56.600 is the harder thing to do.

00:26:59.340 That is honestly

00:27:01.300 what I think

00:27:02.140 is happening here

00:27:02.980 is that a lot of parents

00:27:04.760 and we have all been there,

00:27:07.120 they simply don't want

00:27:08.720 to do the thing

00:27:09.580 that takes longer.

00:27:10.900 They don't want to do

00:27:12.000 the thing

00:27:12.420 that takes more patience

00:27:13.520 and that takes more self-control

00:27:15.460 because parents

00:27:17.140 ourselves

00:27:17.880 are overstimulated.

00:27:19.700 We are therefore distracted

00:27:21.800 and I know

00:27:22.940 from experience

00:27:23.800 that when I'm

00:27:24.520 plugged in on my phone

00:27:25.800 or I'm plugged in

00:27:27.460 working or doing something

00:27:29.440 and something tries

00:27:30.680 to snap me out

00:27:31.700 of that focus,

00:27:32.880 I'm irritable.

00:27:33.900 My first reaction

00:27:34.760 is irritation.

00:27:36.280 And if parents

00:27:36.840 are constantly

00:27:37.680 distracted by technology

00:27:39.140 and we are constantly

00:27:40.200 feeling like,

00:27:40.980 okay,

00:27:41.100 if we have one more thing

00:27:42.460 that makes a sound

00:27:43.160 around us,

00:27:43.820 we're going to snap

00:27:45.020 because we ourselves

00:27:46.400 are overstimulated,

00:27:48.500 then of course

00:27:49.500 that's going to lead parents

00:27:50.820 to say,

00:27:51.080 just turn on the iPad.

00:27:52.920 Fine.

00:27:53.460 Just do it.

00:27:54.080 They don't want to deal

00:27:54.600 with the temper tantrum.

00:27:55.620 They don't want to discipline.

00:27:57.400 Much of the gentle parenting

00:27:59.040 movement has told parents

00:28:00.360 that big feelings

00:28:01.600 just kind of have

00:28:02.380 to be validated

00:28:03.240 and that you can't

00:28:04.100 tell your child,

00:28:04.760 no,

00:28:04.940 you can't take things away.

00:28:06.220 You can't put them

00:28:06.960 in timeout.

00:28:07.660 You can't enforce rules.

00:28:09.040 You can't actually

00:28:10.200 have an enforcement

00:28:11.380 of boundaries.

00:28:13.280 And so a lot of parents

00:28:14.200 are unequipped,

00:28:15.020 but I think a lot of parents,

00:28:16.440 to be honest,

00:28:17.320 are just lazy

00:28:18.440 and tired

00:28:18.980 and distracted

00:28:19.600 and overstimulated.

00:28:21.060 And it is nice

00:28:23.040 for these parents

00:28:24.200 to be able to give

00:28:24.940 their child a pacifier

00:28:26.400 because dealing

00:28:27.500 with the big emotions

00:28:29.160 that you've been told

00:28:30.480 are just perfectly acceptable

00:28:32.380 is really hard.

00:28:33.820 Again,

00:28:35.660 speaking as a fallible person

00:28:37.380 and an imperfect parent myself,

00:28:39.620 this is what I see

00:28:40.780 as a parent,

00:28:41.740 but this is also

00:28:42.340 just what I see

00:28:43.080 by looking at culture.

00:28:45.080 That it's really

00:28:45.880 more than anything

00:28:46.660 a parent problem,

00:28:47.780 not a kid problem.

00:28:49.540 And I've got

00:28:50.380 some more evidence

00:28:51.080 of that in just a second.

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00:30:23.020 All right.

00:30:23.660 I saw a couple videos

00:30:25.340 in light of all of this

00:30:27.680 that I wanted to play today

00:30:29.040 that I think will spark

00:30:30.060 a discussion

00:30:30.680 and just make you think

00:30:32.620 about this,

00:30:33.540 not just from

00:30:34.340 the parent perspective

00:30:35.300 but also from

00:30:36.520 a teacher perspective.

00:30:37.740 Now, I don't know

00:30:38.540 who this person is.

00:30:39.580 I saw their video.

00:30:41.300 It looked like it was

00:30:42.020 going viral on Instagram

00:30:44.180 so a lot of people

00:30:45.140 related to it.

00:30:46.300 All the comments

00:30:46.940 that I read

00:30:47.580 were agreeing

00:30:48.220 with this teacher

00:30:48.940 both teachers

00:30:49.620 and parents

00:30:50.780 and people who work

00:30:51.720 with kids

00:30:52.100 in different capacities.

00:30:53.720 I am sure

00:30:54.220 this person and I

00:30:55.500 don't align

00:30:56.240 on a lot of things.

00:30:57.480 In fact,

00:30:57.800 I've seen her say

00:30:58.680 some like progressive things

00:30:59.800 but it seems to me

00:31:00.880 like she's a teacher

00:31:01.560 who cares

00:31:02.060 and she's spot on

00:31:02.960 in this assessment

00:31:03.680 from my perspective.

00:31:04.820 Here's thought two.

00:31:05.720 So here's exactly

00:31:06.800 what it's like right now

00:31:07.680 working in public education.

00:31:09.100 First of all,

00:31:10.000 the kids have no ability

00:31:11.400 to be bored whatsoever.

00:31:13.300 They live on their phones

00:31:14.520 and they're just fed

00:31:15.420 a constant stream of dopamine

00:31:16.840 from the minute

00:31:17.580 their eyes wake up

00:31:18.500 in the morning

00:31:18.960 until they go

00:31:20.040 to sleep at night.

00:31:20.780 Because they're

00:31:21.400 in a constant state

00:31:22.240 of dopamine withdrawal

00:31:23.140 at school,

00:31:24.260 they behave like addicts.

00:31:26.340 They're super emotional,

00:31:27.780 like the smallest thing

00:31:28.900 sets them off.

00:31:29.820 And when you are

00:31:30.420 standing in front of them

00:31:31.640 trying to teach,

00:31:34.020 they're vacant.

00:31:35.020 They have no ability

00:31:36.400 to tune in

00:31:37.200 if your communication

00:31:38.580 isn't packaged

00:31:39.500 in short little clips

00:31:40.780 and they have a level

00:31:41.820 of apathy

00:31:42.500 that I've never seen before

00:31:43.980 in my whole career.

00:31:45.440 Punishments don't work

00:31:46.520 because they don't

00:31:47.240 care about them.

00:31:48.180 They don't care about grades.

00:31:49.600 They don't care about college.

00:31:50.980 It's like you are

00:31:52.580 interacting with them briefly

00:31:54.000 in between hits

00:31:55.820 of the internet.

00:31:56.840 I can tell you

00:31:57.680 with absolute certainty

00:31:58.780 it is not the teacher's fault.

00:32:00.800 Okay, teachers

00:32:02.640 that I've talked to,

00:32:04.500 both in private

00:32:05.400 and public school,

00:32:06.100 but I do think it's worse

00:32:07.160 in public school

00:32:08.420 because I think

00:32:08.980 a lot of private schools

00:32:10.020 have implemented

00:32:10.780 different rules

00:32:12.140 for probably

00:32:13.000 a longer time now

00:32:14.320 that have said,

00:32:15.100 yeah, no phones.

00:32:17.080 But I know this is also

00:32:18.120 a problem at Christian schools

00:32:19.360 because I know parents

00:32:21.120 of kids at Christian schools

00:32:22.280 who have had to work

00:32:24.160 really hard

00:32:24.640 for schools

00:32:25.140 to implement rules

00:32:25.980 that say no phones,

00:32:27.200 no phones in the hallway,

00:32:28.500 no phones in the classroom.

00:32:29.680 I think I was 16

00:32:31.900 when the iPhone

00:32:33.040 first came out.

00:32:34.040 I did not have an iPhone

00:32:34.920 when it first came out,

00:32:36.060 but cell phones

00:32:36.700 were already a problem.

00:32:37.920 I think I got a flip phone

00:32:39.080 in seventh grade

00:32:40.240 because I was 13

00:32:41.760 and I think that was

00:32:43.640 like the age

00:32:45.240 that my parents

00:32:45.940 started letting me

00:32:46.720 go some places

00:32:47.620 by myself

00:32:48.440 with groups of friends.

00:32:49.620 You know,

00:32:49.860 they'd drop me off

00:32:50.840 and I would call them

00:32:51.620 when I want to be picked up.

00:32:52.920 Really cool.

00:32:53.560 I still remember

00:32:54.340 my cell phone

00:32:55.340 and I remember

00:32:56.320 being addicted

00:32:57.220 to my phone then.

00:32:58.760 Always wanting

00:32:59.560 to text

00:33:00.140 and that's all

00:33:00.600 I could do.

00:33:01.240 I remember

00:33:01.680 I would be so mad

00:33:02.700 when I accidentally

00:33:03.520 hit the button

00:33:04.180 that would put you

00:33:04.940 on the internet.

00:33:05.860 I was like,

00:33:06.100 ah,

00:33:06.740 now I have to get off

00:33:07.680 the internet

00:33:08.160 because it's going

00:33:08.840 to slow everything down

00:33:09.840 and I was like,

00:33:10.880 could not even comprehend

00:33:11.880 what anyone would need

00:33:14.020 the internet for

00:33:15.160 on their phone

00:33:16.020 and of course

00:33:16.880 that changed

00:33:17.620 very quickly

00:33:18.600 over the course

00:33:19.220 of the next few years

00:33:20.640 but all of my friends

00:33:23.260 were also addicted

00:33:24.260 to texting

00:33:24.980 and always wanting

00:33:26.960 to talk on the phone

00:33:28.160 and I remember

00:33:29.100 even getting in trouble

00:33:30.240 in middle school

00:33:31.240 for taking my phone

00:33:32.360 out of my backpack

00:33:33.480 when I wasn't supposed to.

00:33:35.040 There were strict rules

00:33:35.900 around that

00:33:36.600 and then for some reason

00:33:38.100 a lot of schools

00:33:38.920 got lax

00:33:39.900 and then now

00:33:41.020 it seems like

00:33:41.640 they're waking up again

00:33:42.720 to this being

00:33:43.540 a huge problem

00:33:44.580 but it's still

00:33:45.900 a problem

00:33:46.440 even if schools say

00:33:47.880 you cannot be

00:33:49.100 on your phone

00:33:49.860 at all

00:33:50.440 during school hours.

00:33:52.380 Kids who are

00:33:53.040 on their phones

00:33:54.140 all evening

00:33:55.160 they wake up

00:33:56.200 with their phones

00:33:57.180 their brains

00:33:57.900 are just turning

00:33:58.540 to mush

00:33:59.160 and she made

00:34:00.240 a point here

00:34:00.820 that Jonathan Haidt

00:34:01.740 has made

00:34:02.100 that I think

00:34:02.540 is really important

00:34:03.460 it is the addiction

00:34:04.480 to dopamine

00:34:05.240 and all of us

00:34:06.660 no matter our age

00:34:07.680 are really susceptible

00:34:08.660 to this

00:34:09.480 like we need

00:34:11.300 things to change quickly

00:34:13.420 we need stimulation

00:34:14.800 I've definitely

00:34:15.940 been that person

00:34:17.280 who I will be

00:34:18.060 watching a show

00:34:19.000 and I'm doing

00:34:20.260 something on my phone

00:34:21.400 and I'm typing

00:34:22.360 something on my iPad

00:34:23.860 that honestly sounds

00:34:25.140 like a good time

00:34:26.080 to me

00:34:26.540 there's something

00:34:27.560 wrong with our brain

00:34:29.000 when we need

00:34:29.760 that much entertainment

00:34:31.000 and I can tell you

00:34:32.580 it is more difficult

00:34:33.980 for me

00:34:35.080 to read

00:34:36.440 than it used to be

00:34:38.220 to pay attention

00:34:39.080 for a long time

00:34:39.980 I have to

00:34:40.540 the book has to be

00:34:41.440 really good

00:34:42.260 and really enthralling

00:34:43.580 for me to read

00:34:45.140 several pages

00:34:46.000 at a time

00:34:46.620 without stopping

00:34:47.500 I say that

00:34:48.200 to my shame

00:34:49.180 okay

00:34:49.620 and when I was

00:34:51.120 in high school

00:34:51.860 thank goodness

00:34:52.620 because we just

00:34:53.520 didn't have

00:34:54.020 as much

00:34:54.800 on our phones

00:34:55.880 I read

00:34:56.800 all of the time

00:34:57.860 that's what

00:34:58.540 I was staying

00:34:59.320 up late doing

00:35:00.080 now it might have

00:35:00.960 been some trashy

00:35:01.880 teen fiction

00:35:02.440 that I shouldn't

00:35:03.140 have been reading

00:35:03.960 but I was reading

00:35:05.320 might not have

00:35:06.540 been good for my heart

00:35:07.420 but it was better

00:35:08.220 for my brain

00:35:09.060 than being on

00:35:09.860 social media

00:35:10.620 would have been

00:35:11.220 I'm so glad

00:35:11.880 we didn't have

00:35:12.420 things like Snapchat

00:35:13.420 also just emotionally

00:35:14.600 I think that's

00:35:15.380 so hard

00:35:16.240 for teenagers

00:35:17.040 especially teenage girls

00:35:18.640 to see in real time

00:35:20.140 that you're being

00:35:20.720 left out

00:35:21.840 rather than

00:35:23.320 hearing about it

00:35:24.140 on Monday

00:35:24.780 after the weekend

00:35:25.660 but that's how

00:35:27.300 I was you know

00:35:28.080 spending my hours

00:35:29.080 and I could read

00:35:30.540 for hours at a time

00:35:31.760 and pay attention

00:35:32.820 and now I have

00:35:33.960 a tough time

00:35:34.460 doing that

00:35:35.020 I even have

00:35:35.980 a tough time

00:35:36.520 paying attention

00:35:37.100 to a TV show

00:35:38.260 without taking a break

00:35:39.620 and looking at my phone

00:35:40.760 again unless it's

00:35:41.560 really interesting to me

00:35:42.800 and I'm listening

00:35:44.040 right now

00:35:44.560 to an audio book

00:35:45.560 about ADD

00:35:46.940 it's by Dr. Amen

00:35:48.380 and he talks

00:35:49.800 about how

00:35:50.820 shows today

00:35:52.000 move so much

00:35:53.660 more quickly

00:35:54.320 the frame rate

00:35:55.300 is a lot higher

00:35:56.520 than it used to be

00:35:57.720 to try to keep

00:35:58.820 people's attention

00:35:59.660 this is true

00:36:00.420 of video games

00:36:01.260 this is true

00:36:01.780 of phone games

00:36:02.680 this is true

00:36:03.980 of the videos

00:36:06.000 that I even

00:36:07.140 put up on social

00:36:08.020 media

00:36:08.500 we have noticed

00:36:10.300 as every content

00:36:11.800 creator does

00:36:12.760 that people

00:36:14.220 need movement

00:36:15.600 on the screen

00:36:16.440 to pay attention

00:36:17.000 to your video

00:36:17.660 that's why

00:36:18.740 you see

00:36:19.420 when you're

00:36:19.780 watching a video

00:36:20.780 you probably

00:36:21.120 don't even

00:36:21.460 really notice it

00:36:22.500 but the video

00:36:24.060 of the commentator

00:36:25.060 will kind of

00:36:25.780 jump in

00:36:26.780 jump out

00:36:27.880 it will cut

00:36:28.540 it will put up

00:36:29.340 different graphics

00:36:30.600 different pictures

00:36:31.420 different videos

00:36:32.340 different texts

00:36:33.260 that is because

00:36:34.500 the user typically

00:36:35.700 requires those things

00:36:37.340 in order to pay attention

00:36:38.580 so this has done

00:36:39.840 a number

00:36:40.160 on all of our brains

00:36:41.640 but when kids

00:36:43.440 whose brains

00:36:44.300 aren't even developed

00:36:45.500 are addicted

00:36:46.200 to dopamine

00:36:46.800 this early

00:36:47.620 they have a hard

00:36:48.720 time ever being

00:36:49.720 bored

00:36:50.100 learning how

00:36:50.940 to entertain

00:36:51.600 themselves

00:36:52.260 learning how

00:36:53.440 to be curious

00:36:54.620 to satisfy

00:36:55.800 their curiosity

00:36:56.840 they have a hard

00:36:58.200 they have a hard

00:36:58.840 time working

00:36:59.620 their confidence

00:37:00.800 levels lower

00:37:01.720 because they don't

00:37:02.660 know that they

00:37:03.340 can do difficult

00:37:04.280 things

00:37:04.840 they don't know

00:37:06.080 that they can

00:37:06.620 endure pain

00:37:07.460 they don't know

00:37:08.540 that they can

00:37:09.020 be patient

00:37:09.540 they don't know

00:37:10.380 that they can

00:37:10.980 persevere

00:37:11.460 because they

00:37:12.940 are never

00:37:13.700 made to

00:37:15.300 it is instant

00:37:16.860 gratification

00:37:18.100 and all of this

00:37:19.400 makes it really

00:37:20.580 hard for them

00:37:21.400 to become

00:37:21.920 mature adults

00:37:23.000 they don't even

00:37:24.040 know how to

00:37:24.540 stop their own

00:37:25.300 temper tantrums

00:37:26.280 to stop their

00:37:26.980 own disappointment

00:37:28.500 because rather

00:37:29.500 than working

00:37:30.080 through those

00:37:30.820 feelings

00:37:31.220 they are simply

00:37:31.980 given a pacifier

00:37:33.220 in an iPad

00:37:34.540 and speaking

00:37:35.900 of confidence

00:37:36.660 this is like

00:37:37.480 this is a big

00:37:38.180 one and something

00:37:38.840 that Jonathan

00:37:39.440 Haidt talks

00:37:40.080 about a lot

00:37:40.780 confidence

00:37:41.680 and courage

00:37:42.660 that is something

00:37:43.580 that is not

00:37:44.260 just lacking

00:37:44.920 in kids

00:37:45.460 today but

00:37:45.920 it's also

00:37:46.540 lacking in

00:37:47.280 parents

00:37:47.860 and I get

00:37:48.840 that like

00:37:49.340 because I go

00:37:49.900 to the park

00:37:50.460 a lot with

00:37:51.020 my kids

00:37:51.620 and my propensity

00:37:52.880 is to be

00:37:53.900 an anxious

00:37:54.540 parent

00:37:55.080 is to

00:37:55.980 overthink

00:37:56.780 and I have

00:37:58.080 had to

00:37:58.620 discipline myself

00:37:59.900 and practice

00:38:00.800 my own

00:38:01.560 self-control

00:38:02.280 and really

00:38:02.960 letting my

00:38:03.680 kids explore

00:38:04.680 and even

00:38:05.460 allowing to

00:38:06.760 a reasonable

00:38:07.820 extent

00:38:08.540 risk and

00:38:10.120 danger and

00:38:10.860 injury when

00:38:12.000 we're at

00:38:12.340 the park

00:38:12.720 but I

00:38:13.640 would say

00:38:14.140 that most

00:38:14.860 parents there

00:38:15.640 are following

00:38:17.000 their kids

00:38:17.800 closely behind

00:38:18.920 them every

00:38:20.240 step of the

00:38:21.020 way in every

00:38:21.860 part of the

00:38:22.480 park I'm not

00:38:23.200 talking about

00:38:23.820 their little

00:38:24.400 babies who

00:38:25.140 can't walk

00:38:25.780 yet because

00:38:26.240 that's

00:38:26.520 understandable

00:38:27.160 or who

00:38:27.660 are kind

00:38:28.380 of wobbly

00:38:28.940 I'm talking

00:38:29.460 about three

00:38:29.960 four and

00:38:30.520 five year

00:38:31.180 olds being

00:38:31.840 kind of

00:38:32.480 hovered and

00:38:33.460 stalked by

00:38:34.260 their parents

00:38:35.080 on on the

00:38:37.200 playground and

00:38:37.920 this is not

00:38:38.600 just parents

00:38:39.420 this is not

00:38:40.500 it's not

00:38:41.560 healthy for

00:38:42.400 the most

00:38:42.940 part and

00:38:43.440 again speaking

00:38:44.740 as someone

00:38:45.260 who is

00:38:46.000 tempted by

00:38:46.620 that kind

00:38:47.440 of thing

00:38:47.800 it's actually

00:38:48.700 causing

00:38:49.500 stunted

00:38:51.060 growth in

00:38:52.040 our kids

00:38:53.080 that's what

00:38:53.940 a lot of

00:38:54.520 people argue

00:38:55.500 and Jonathan

00:38:56.120 Haidt argues

00:38:57.020 for allowing

00:38:57.780 your kids

00:38:58.380 to do risky

00:38:59.740 things at an

00:39:00.700 age appropriate

00:39:01.380 time particularly

00:39:02.840 around age

00:39:03.920 seven and

00:39:04.900 so I saw

00:39:05.860 this video

00:39:06.540 going around

00:39:07.360 on Instagram

00:39:08.060 that some

00:39:08.700 people had an

00:39:09.420 issue with

00:39:09.980 but I

00:39:10.320 thought

00:39:10.560 okay this

00:39:11.560 is great

00:39:12.260 so the

00:39:13.020 video is

00:39:13.980 just so I

00:39:14.360 don't have

00:39:14.580 to play the

00:39:15.040 whole thing

00:39:15.420 let me give

00:39:15.800 you a little

00:39:16.120 context first

00:39:16.860 so this

00:39:17.560 mom says

00:39:18.060 she read

00:39:18.680 this book

00:39:19.360 the anxious

00:39:19.760 generation

00:39:20.400 and she

00:39:22.120 read in it

00:39:23.320 that they

00:39:23.700 you know

00:39:24.340 should be

00:39:25.360 having their

00:39:25.880 kids do

00:39:26.200 hard things

00:39:26.660 and so

00:39:27.460 she sent

00:39:28.000 her seven

00:39:28.500 year old

00:39:28.860 son into

00:39:29.920 this chick

00:39:31.100 filet by

00:39:32.300 himself to

00:39:34.020 order dinner

00:39:35.020 she can't

00:39:36.240 see him

00:39:36.920 she's just

00:39:37.640 sitting outside

00:39:38.660 in her car

00:39:40.060 gives the

00:39:41.260 seven year

00:39:41.840 old her

00:39:42.920 card and

00:39:43.760 says this

00:39:44.380 is what you

00:39:44.980 should order

00:39:45.600 if you need

00:39:46.240 any help

00:39:46.980 ask the

00:39:48.680 manager to

00:39:49.920 help you

00:39:50.940 and she's

00:39:53.020 so excited

00:39:53.720 because this

00:39:54.560 little kid

00:39:55.160 comes out

00:39:56.020 of the

00:39:56.260 chick-fil-a

00:39:56.800 carrying all

00:39:57.740 of the

00:39:58.040 drinks and

00:39:58.740 all of the

00:39:59.760 bags and

00:40:00.260 so he did

00:40:00.720 it he

00:40:01.020 accomplished

00:40:01.500 the task

00:40:02.200 and his

00:40:02.800 reaction to

00:40:03.680 accomplishing

00:40:04.300 this task

00:40:04.960 was just so

00:40:05.960 sweet

00:40:06.520 here's top

00:40:06.980 three

00:40:07.240 oh my

00:40:07.880 gosh

00:40:08.440 he did

00:40:09.060 it

00:40:09.820 hey

00:40:16.380 I didn't

00:40:17.860 have to

00:40:18.880 ask the

00:40:19.920 manager or

00:40:20.820 anything

00:40:21.240 really

00:40:21.860 he just

00:40:22.400 gave it

00:40:22.820 to me

00:40:23.220 yeah

00:40:23.440 they just

00:40:23.960 served

00:40:24.280 you

00:40:24.600 yeah

00:40:25.040 and then

00:40:26.660 yeah

00:40:27.340 you got

00:40:29.720 your happy

00:40:30.240 mail and

00:40:30.960 he gave

00:40:33.000 me some

00:40:33.440 money

00:40:33.700 back

00:40:34.060 I want

00:40:36.700 to do

00:40:37.000 that

00:40:37.240 again

00:40:37.620 really

00:40:38.080 yeah

00:40:39.020 that

00:40:39.440 is

00:40:39.700 so

00:40:40.020 fun

00:40:40.360 do

00:40:40.880 you feel

00:40:41.200 like that

00:40:41.780 builds

00:40:42.340 confidence

00:40:43.480 yeah

00:40:44.400 for sure

00:40:45.640 like a little

00:40:46.680 nervous

00:40:47.140 yeah

00:40:47.860 like my

00:40:48.940 legs are

00:40:49.460 still

00:40:49.760 shivering

00:40:50.340 really

00:40:51.000 but yeah

00:40:52.080 I

00:40:52.920 that was

00:40:54.040 so fun

00:40:54.460 I just

00:40:55.940 I loved

00:40:56.460 what he

00:40:56.720 said there

00:40:57.120 at the

00:40:57.380 end

00:40:57.620 that his

00:40:58.040 legs were

00:40:58.680 still

00:40:59.100 shivering

00:40:59.680 so he

00:41:01.340 was scared

00:41:01.880 but he

00:41:02.240 did it

00:41:02.540 anyway

00:41:02.900 and you

00:41:04.060 know I

00:41:04.380 was talking

00:41:04.940 to

00:41:05.680 Marissa

00:41:07.180 Strait

00:41:07.700 who is

00:41:08.060 the head

00:41:08.560 of Prager

00:41:09.620 U

00:41:10.020 and I

00:41:10.940 remember

00:41:11.300 her telling

00:41:12.000 me the

00:41:12.480 same thing

00:41:13.140 that at

00:41:13.780 about age

00:41:14.780 seven

00:41:15.260 is when

00:41:16.460 you should

00:41:17.000 start

00:41:17.760 allowing

00:41:18.600 your children

00:41:19.440 to take

00:41:20.300 reasonable

00:41:21.220 risks

00:41:22.340 and I

00:41:22.900 think it

00:41:23.260 comes even

00:41:23.740 before that

00:41:24.460 depending on

00:41:25.040 the child

00:41:25.500 and depending

00:41:26.120 on what

00:41:27.180 it is

00:41:27.560 but having

00:41:28.000 your child

00:41:28.760 you know

00:41:29.640 cook something

00:41:30.600 or you

00:41:32.160 know make

00:41:32.880 breakfast

00:41:33.480 make their

00:41:34.080 own lunch

00:41:34.980 and she

00:41:36.500 said something

00:41:37.080 that really

00:41:37.660 stuck with

00:41:38.460 me because

00:41:39.260 I think

00:41:39.880 the rebuttal

00:41:41.360 to that

00:41:41.840 is always

00:41:42.480 by parents

00:41:43.180 but what

00:41:44.700 if they

00:41:45.040 get hurt

00:41:45.620 and I

00:41:46.140 remember

00:41:46.660 she said

00:41:47.200 if the

00:41:48.460 worst thing

00:41:49.300 that happens

00:41:50.080 is that

00:41:51.020 they get

00:41:51.520 hurt

00:41:52.000 like

00:41:52.560 that's

00:41:53.180 okay

00:41:53.640 like

00:41:54.460 you can

00:41:55.020 go

00:41:55.400 you can

00:41:55.820 get a

00:41:56.100 band-aid

00:41:56.580 or you

00:41:57.060 can even

00:41:57.400 go to

00:41:57.640 the emergency

00:41:58.180 room

00:41:58.600 that's not

00:41:59.220 saying that

00:41:59.580 that's a

00:41:59.900 good thing

00:42:00.440 but if

00:42:00.740 it's not

00:42:01.040 a life

00:42:01.480 or death

00:42:01.920 situation

00:42:02.680 we should

00:42:04.020 be allowing

00:42:04.720 our children

00:42:05.380 to even

00:42:06.160 risk a

00:42:06.880 certain level

00:42:07.800 of course

00:42:08.440 of injury

00:42:10.100 because it's

00:42:10.860 good for

00:42:11.200 their character

00:42:11.960 to be brave

00:42:12.900 and nowadays

00:42:14.000 like we have

00:42:14.720 to manufacture

00:42:15.580 the situations

00:42:16.420 for our kids

00:42:17.220 to be brave

00:42:17.820 but that is

00:42:18.520 a muscle

00:42:18.960 that we want

00:42:19.680 them to build

00:42:20.480 before they

00:42:22.160 leave the

00:42:22.620 house

00:42:22.820 so all

00:42:23.640 of this

00:42:24.060 like really

00:42:24.520 convicts me

00:42:25.140 not the

00:42:25.740 technology

00:42:26.360 stuff

00:42:26.800 because that's

00:42:27.540 not we

00:42:27.980 don't allow

00:42:28.540 like the

00:42:29.100 you know

00:42:29.860 tablet use

00:42:30.920 and the

00:42:31.160 phone use

00:42:31.800 and stuff

00:42:32.400 in our

00:42:33.480 home

00:42:33.840 but making

00:42:35.260 sure that

00:42:36.140 kids are

00:42:36.680 given the

00:42:37.260 opportunity

00:42:37.880 for courage

00:42:38.900 and responsibility

00:42:40.020 and this

00:42:41.820 goes back

00:42:42.380 to doing

00:42:42.840 the hard

00:42:43.440 thing in

00:42:44.140 parenting

00:42:44.500 because it's

00:42:45.220 easier just

00:42:46.020 to do it

00:42:46.600 ourselves

00:42:47.040 and gosh

00:42:48.180 I'm tempted

00:42:48.780 by that

00:42:49.340 but doing

00:42:49.860 the hard

00:42:50.280 thing

00:42:50.560 the thing

00:42:50.980 that takes

00:42:51.420 more time

00:42:52.100 the thing

00:42:52.960 that might

00:42:53.780 elicit some

00:42:54.760 temper tantrums

00:42:55.880 the thing

00:42:56.420 that might

00:42:57.280 demand of

00:42:58.000 us emotional

00:42:59.000 regulation

00:42:59.680 and self-control

00:43:00.540 is almost

00:43:01.280 always the

00:43:02.220 right thing

00:43:02.760 to do as

00:43:03.240 a parent

00:43:03.660 and gosh

00:43:04.160 we are

00:43:05.600 all learning

00:43:06.820 that and it's

00:43:07.500 different in

00:43:08.020 every season

00:43:09.080 as I'm sure

00:43:09.900 I will know

00:43:11.380 in the coming

00:43:12.120 years

00:43:12.520 all right

00:43:13.440 we've got

00:43:14.260 another segment

00:43:15.020 a new segment

00:43:16.020 as I said

00:43:16.980 with our

00:43:18.160 new

00:43:18.640 special guest

00:43:20.660 I'll call her

00:43:21.080 our special

00:43:21.520 guest

00:43:21.880 and her name

00:43:22.600 is Phoenix

00:43:23.220 and she is

00:43:24.080 Gen Z

00:43:24.700 and she asked

00:43:25.520 if she could

00:43:26.020 come on the

00:43:26.460 show and talk

00:43:27.040 about something

00:43:27.660 that she felt

00:43:28.280 is really

00:43:28.700 important

00:43:29.200 that I think

00:43:30.040 is really

00:43:30.440 important too

00:43:31.060 and that is

00:43:31.460 a trend

00:43:31.800 that's going

00:43:32.240 on on

00:43:33.220 TikTok

00:43:33.640 called skinny

00:43:35.620 talk

00:43:36.020 and it is

00:43:36.740 basically

00:43:37.180 glorifying

00:43:38.120 anorexia

00:43:38.940 and this is

00:43:40.040 a form of

00:43:40.680 TikTok

00:43:41.000 that is

00:43:41.860 especially

00:43:42.440 addicting

00:43:43.160 for young

00:43:44.320 women

00:43:44.640 first of all

00:43:45.240 your teenage

00:43:45.740 girls

00:43:46.060 shouldn't

00:43:46.380 be on

00:43:46.720 TikTok

00:43:47.000 at all

00:43:47.800 but it's

00:43:48.960 not just

00:43:49.360 teenagers

00:43:49.780 it's also

00:43:50.660 young adults

00:43:51.580 and it is

00:43:52.880 a very

00:43:53.220 unhealthy

00:43:54.420 response

00:43:55.220 to the

00:43:56.260 maybe

00:43:57.080 exaggerated

00:43:59.080 body

00:43:59.560 positivity

00:44:00.100 movement

00:44:00.760 that seems

00:44:01.440 to condone

00:44:02.120 being unhealthy

00:44:03.320 so she's

00:44:03.880 going to

00:44:04.120 break this

00:44:04.500 down for

00:44:04.920 us in

00:44:05.260 just a

00:44:05.620 second

00:44:05.900 let me

00:44:06.580 pause

00:44:06.840 and tell

00:44:07.080 you about

00:44:07.300 our next

00:44:07.640 sponsor

00:44:07.960 first

00:44:08.400 that's

00:44:09.880 Jace

00:44:10.260 Madical

00:44:11.000 Jace

00:44:11.820 Madical

00:44:12.420 is making

00:44:13.400 sure that

00:44:13.980 you are

00:44:14.360 prepared

00:44:14.880 in a

00:44:15.740 medical

00:44:16.160 emergency

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00:45:27.500 Phoenix

00:45:33.000 thanks so

00:45:33.520 much for

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00:45:34.200 relatable

00:45:34.580 for the

00:45:34.960 first time

00:45:35.620 thank you

00:45:36.160 for having

00:45:36.620 me

00:45:37.020 yes

00:45:37.580 so

00:45:38.300 Phoenix

00:45:39.040 talked to

00:45:39.920 Bree

00:45:40.320 and to

00:45:40.800 me

00:45:41.100 about

00:45:41.760 this

00:45:42.600 segment

00:45:43.040 having

00:45:43.400 kind of

00:45:43.900 like a

00:45:44.320 pop culture

00:45:45.080 social media

00:45:46.080 segment

00:45:46.620 but about

00:45:47.280 things happening

00:45:48.120 online

00:45:48.660 that really

00:45:49.840 matter

00:45:50.340 and you

00:45:51.160 brought up

00:45:51.700 skinny talk

00:45:52.540 I'm not

00:45:53.000 on tiktok

00:45:53.640 so I have

00:45:54.180 no idea

00:45:54.960 what it

00:45:55.400 is but

00:45:55.780 when you

00:45:56.040 explain to

00:45:56.740 me

00:45:57.020 I'm like

00:45:57.920 okay yeah

00:45:58.440 that's probably

00:45:59.000 having a

00:45:59.520 big effect

00:46:00.500 especially

00:46:01.000 on young

00:46:01.600 women so

00:46:02.040 can you

00:46:02.460 just break

00:46:02.900 it down

00:46:03.200 for us

00:46:03.520 what is

00:46:03.860 it

00:46:04.120 yeah

00:46:04.880 so skinny

00:46:05.520 talk is

00:46:06.500 essentially

00:46:07.040 this whole

00:46:07.680 like genre

00:46:08.880 of tiktok

00:46:10.100 where

00:46:10.700 these

00:46:12.560 influencers

00:46:13.340 they call

00:46:13.960 themselves

00:46:14.320 like skinny

00:46:14.980 influencers

00:46:15.720 are kind

00:46:17.560 of taking

00:46:17.980 to tiktok

00:46:18.600 to help

00:46:19.980 other people

00:46:20.700 get skinny

00:46:22.180 but I think

00:46:24.420 what they're

00:46:24.800 promoting is

00:46:25.600 kind of

00:46:26.480 unhealthy

00:46:28.340 I mean I

00:46:29.040 don't want

00:46:29.360 to like

00:46:29.740 shame anyone

00:46:31.140 but I

00:46:31.960 still feel

00:46:32.960 like it's

00:46:33.340 important to

00:46:33.940 draw a

00:46:34.380 line

00:46:34.720 as to

00:46:35.620 like what

00:46:36.040 is healthy

00:46:37.000 behavior

00:46:37.660 and what

00:46:38.160 seems to

00:46:38.600 be more

00:46:38.900 along the

00:46:39.280 lines of

00:46:39.660 like obsession

00:46:40.820 leading to

00:46:41.840 you know

00:46:42.660 disordered

00:46:43.260 thoughts and

00:46:44.200 patterns

00:46:44.900 yeah so I

00:46:46.460 want to play

00:46:46.860 some of these

00:46:47.320 videos from

00:46:48.440 is it I

00:46:49.020 mean do they

00:46:49.420 call themselves

00:46:50.420 like skinny

00:46:51.220 talk influencers

00:46:52.540 they do

00:46:53.300 okay

00:46:54.280 they do

00:46:54.740 okay so

00:46:55.780 let's play

00:46:56.760 some of

00:46:57.360 these and

00:46:58.060 then we

00:46:58.400 can kind

00:46:58.860 of get

00:46:59.200 your reaction

00:46:59.980 to them

00:47:00.740 Liv Schmidt

00:47:02.940 who is she

00:47:03.740 before we

00:47:04.320 play her

00:47:04.720 video

00:47:05.140 Liv Schmidt

00:47:05.900 is definitely

00:47:06.600 one of the

00:47:07.140 more like

00:47:07.760 I would say

00:47:08.660 infamous skinny

00:47:09.800 talk influencers

00:47:10.620 she's kind of

00:47:11.440 one of the

00:47:11.740 first ones

00:47:12.480 she is I

00:47:14.580 mean well

00:47:15.100 first of all

00:47:15.640 like she's

00:47:16.260 objectively

00:47:16.780 like beautiful

00:47:18.060 and she

00:47:19.880 seems like

00:47:20.960 she likes to

00:47:23.200 have fun and

00:47:23.700 live her life

00:47:24.300 but she

00:47:24.820 also kind

00:47:26.640 of her

00:47:27.560 shtick is

00:47:28.560 she calls

00:47:31.060 it portion

00:47:31.620 control

00:47:32.280 but it's

00:47:34.460 very obsessive

00:47:35.500 yeah in

00:47:36.560 the way that

00:47:37.060 she like

00:47:37.540 markets this

00:47:39.040 like how to

00:47:40.420 get skinny

00:47:40.840 she actually

00:47:41.260 sells a course

00:47:42.080 on like how

00:47:43.500 to get skinny

00:47:44.200 everything I do

00:47:45.300 to get skinny

00:47:46.080 etc and so

00:47:47.280 you feel like

00:47:47.800 it's just

00:47:48.100 glorifying eating

00:47:49.060 disorders it's

00:47:50.100 basically very

00:47:51.440 strict calorie

00:47:52.660 restriction

00:47:53.300 yes and

00:47:54.660 and one of

00:47:55.820 Liv Schmidt's

00:47:56.400 things is

00:47:57.400 that you need

00:47:58.740 to that you

00:48:00.660 need to like

00:48:01.160 portion restrict

00:48:02.400 yeah like to

00:48:03.720 a degree that

00:48:05.460 like she

00:48:06.100 recommends like

00:48:07.420 eating like

00:48:09.040 five bites

00:48:09.920 of a meal

00:48:11.160 okay and

00:48:11.920 then walking

00:48:12.360 away that's

00:48:13.140 what's meant by

00:48:13.680 it because

00:48:14.020 obviously portion

00:48:14.920 restriction like

00:48:15.700 is important we

00:48:16.640 shouldn't eat

00:48:17.240 like a whole

00:48:17.880 pizza on our

00:48:19.180 own because

00:48:19.660 that's gluttony

00:48:20.660 but she's

00:48:21.900 saying don't

00:48:22.460 just don't eat

00:48:23.120 until you're

00:48:23.520 full eat like

00:48:24.620 five bites okay

00:48:25.460 here's top five

00:48:26.200 a lot of you

00:48:28.480 love to ask me

00:48:29.500 what I eat in

00:48:30.280 a day and the

00:48:31.060 second I tell

00:48:31.960 you or even

00:48:32.920 hint at it

00:48:33.960 shock it's

00:48:34.940 horror it's

00:48:35.640 panic like

00:48:36.300 that's barely

00:48:37.060 any food yeah

00:48:38.160 no what do

00:48:39.020 you think I'm

00:48:39.540 eating a ton of

00:48:40.700 donuts pizza and

00:48:41.760 McDonald's or

00:48:42.560 every day babe be

00:48:43.940 serious be so

00:48:45.280 for real I don't

00:48:46.060 eat like that

00:48:46.680 because I don't

00:48:47.500 want to look like

00:48:48.360 that I eat in

00:48:49.300 portions I eat

00:48:50.360 with intention if

00:48:51.560 I ate like

00:48:52.120 garbage I would

00:48:53.000 feel like garbage

00:48:53.800 and I wouldn't

00:48:54.760 look the way I

00:48:55.460 do I chose to

00:48:56.560 be skinny I

00:48:57.380 chose to be

00:48:57.960 disciplined and

00:48:58.920 if that makes

00:48:59.460 you uncomfortable

00:48:59.960 that's not my

00:49:00.740 problem okay is

00:49:02.940 it discipline or

00:49:03.920 is it disorder

00:49:04.920 there's a

00:49:05.680 difference there

00:49:06.640 is so I feel

00:49:08.100 like the

00:49:09.900 difference lies in

00:49:11.640 what she actually

00:49:13.000 recommends now

00:49:14.240 she will say

00:49:15.620 that she doesn't

00:49:16.400 have any like

00:49:17.320 restricted foods

00:49:18.680 but she also

00:49:20.360 advocates for

00:49:21.400 like actually

00:49:22.540 only eating five

00:49:23.620 bites of a

00:49:24.520 meal and then

00:49:25.340 walking away so

00:49:26.620 she's it's a

00:49:28.900 different version

00:49:30.680 of I feel like

00:49:33.240 disordered eating

00:49:33.980 not so much

00:49:34.640 focused on like

00:49:35.620 foods that you're

00:49:36.940 afraid of but

00:49:37.840 focused on like

00:49:38.860 just the portion

00:49:41.640 size that being

00:49:43.180 so small like it's

00:49:44.520 actually like a

00:49:45.420 toddler portion

00:49:46.220 yes okay

00:49:47.660 everyone that I've

00:49:48.740 known that has

00:49:49.460 struggled with

00:49:49.980 disordered eating

00:49:50.760 and I've talked

00:49:51.520 about this before

00:49:52.180 I've written about

00:49:52.800 it before I did

00:49:54.500 when I was in

00:49:55.300 college it started

00:49:56.240 out by I

00:49:58.040 wouldn't have

00:49:58.700 called it

00:49:59.020 anorexia at the

00:49:59.960 time and actually

00:50:00.580 I kind of have a

00:50:01.320 still a hard time

00:50:02.720 calling it that but

00:50:03.660 it was certainly

00:50:04.380 restrictive eating

00:50:05.360 and I had a lot of

00:50:06.780 friends who were

00:50:07.200 doing the same

00:50:07.840 thing but because

00:50:09.120 we were eating

00:50:09.940 and because we

00:50:10.760 would eat cake

00:50:11.600 and we would eat

00:50:12.540 Mexican food and

00:50:13.760 we would eat

00:50:14.180 whatever we wanted

00:50:15.120 we would never

00:50:16.600 say that we had

00:50:17.580 any sort of issue

00:50:18.500 but it was you

00:50:19.920 would eat as

00:50:20.500 small as possible

00:50:21.640 and then for me

00:50:23.200 during this time

00:50:23.920 period of my life

00:50:24.800 I was working out

00:50:25.880 hard twice a day

00:50:27.120 and my goal was

00:50:28.980 to cancel out

00:50:30.280 any calories that

00:50:31.800 I was eating

00:50:32.280 that is not

00:50:33.200 discipline that is

00:50:34.480 a disorder that's

00:50:35.700 a disorder I

00:50:36.760 agree I agree and

00:50:37.860 I struggled with

00:50:38.940 an eating disorder

00:50:39.740 when I was in

00:50:40.780 high school as

00:50:41.660 well and and I

00:50:43.600 have to agree with

00:50:44.860 you like I did

00:50:45.720 I feel like the

00:50:47.500 the whole nine

00:50:49.200 yards with it

00:50:50.540 all like there

00:50:51.320 were foods that I

00:50:52.280 like absolutely

00:50:52.860 refused to eat and

00:50:54.120 I definitely like

00:50:55.140 restricted the foods

00:50:56.640 that I did eat

00:50:57.660 but I feel like that

00:51:00.180 kind of that kind

00:51:02.180 of mentality gives

00:51:04.120 it's so hard because

00:51:07.200 you don't want to

00:51:07.720 like you know shame

00:51:08.880 these people or give

00:51:09.720 them like the

00:51:10.880 negative attention

00:51:11.560 that they're that

00:51:12.840 they're seeking

00:51:13.520 because like that's

00:51:15.480 eating disorders are

00:51:16.740 competitive and

00:51:18.880 and and these

00:51:19.720 people live Schmidt

00:51:21.400 she says all the

00:51:22.120 time eat small be

00:51:23.600 small or she also

00:51:25.220 says you're not a

00:51:27.760 dog don't reward

00:51:28.560 yourself with food

00:51:29.560 which I feel like is

00:51:31.380 is so telling yeah

00:51:33.140 of of where her

00:51:34.220 mindset actually is

00:51:35.620 yeah I remember I

00:51:37.460 had a friend who

00:51:38.360 recommended a book

00:51:39.480 in college and it

00:51:40.540 was called the skinny

00:51:41.380 girl method and it

00:51:42.800 was literally like

00:51:43.880 never eat a full

00:51:45.280 banana just eat half

00:51:47.320 of it and then put

00:51:48.060 it away I'm like

00:51:49.060 what I mean that's

00:51:50.920 basically that's

00:51:52.580 basically what we're

00:51:53.320 talking about here

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00:52:57.200 okay there's someone who

00:53:03.220 goes by I guess the

00:53:04.600 moniker the mean older

00:53:05.720 sister of tiktok

00:53:07.080 Mina or is it Mina

00:53:08.600 I think that one's

00:53:09.800 Amanda Doppler

00:53:10.660 oh okay

00:53:12.280 Mina Zaylee

00:53:15.140 Mina Zaylee is on

00:53:17.240 is on one of the

00:53:19.380 bigger skinny influencers

00:53:20.820 on tiktok

00:53:22.260 okay

00:53:22.860 let's play Sat Night

00:53:24.160 welcome to skinny

00:53:25.660 talk get ready with me

00:53:26.620 while I tell you my

00:53:27.240 biggest tips and tricks

00:53:28.040 I use to stay skinny

00:53:29.400 um there is no secret

00:53:31.080 there is no tricks you

00:53:32.220 just eat less and you

00:53:33.800 stay active you make it

00:53:36.280 your lifestyle

00:53:37.500 yeah there is no tips

00:53:40.660 and tricks there is no

00:53:42.100 buckwheat there is no

00:53:45.240 intermittent fasting

00:53:46.600 there is no carnivore diet

00:53:49.540 that will make you lose

00:53:51.380 weight and keep it off

00:53:52.340 it's one of those

00:53:52.860 things where once you

00:53:53.900 lose the weight you

00:53:54.740 continue doing that to

00:53:55.980 an extent to keep it

00:53:57.420 off

00:53:57.700 okay here is the meaner

00:54:00.140 older sister we had

00:54:01.020 that on the wrong

00:54:01.580 person Amanda Dobler

00:54:03.080 saw eight

00:54:03.600 you want to lose weight

00:54:05.260 but you're super busy

00:54:06.240 right now and you're

00:54:07.240 gonna wait until you

00:54:08.300 actually have time in

00:54:09.600 like a few weeks or a

00:54:10.400 few months that's

00:54:11.520 pathetic you're quitting

00:54:12.620 before you even start

00:54:13.960 like that is just the

00:54:15.280 most loser behavior I've

00:54:17.280 ever heard of in my

00:54:18.240 entire life

00:54:18.820 okay so are these

00:54:21.600 people reacting to the

00:54:24.280 overly exaggerated body

00:54:26.380 positivity movement which

00:54:28.260 basically has people on

00:54:30.300 the cover of you know

00:54:31.600 17 magazine who are

00:54:33.520 obviously not in shape

00:54:35.320 saying this is healthy

00:54:37.360 it's okay to be obese and

00:54:39.640 you can be whatever weight

00:54:41.780 you want and it's totally

00:54:42.820 healthy that's also not

00:54:44.580 true do you see this as

00:54:46.140 kind of an unhealthy

00:54:47.760 pendulum swing from

00:54:48.980 that totally

00:54:50.320 yeah I think it's it's

00:54:52.880 largely reactionary I

00:54:55.060 think a lot of I think

00:54:56.640 I think it's expressing a

00:54:57.780 desire that a lot of

00:54:58.700 women have to be

00:55:01.300 beautiful and you know

00:55:03.200 be healthy and there's

00:55:05.660 but the problem is that

00:55:07.940 you know when you get so

00:55:09.000 obsessed with it that

00:55:10.140 like you talk that way to

00:55:13.560 yourself and you talk

00:55:14.900 that way to other people

00:55:16.080 like it it definitely

00:55:17.560 demonstrates a level of

00:55:20.180 obsession that is like the

00:55:21.760 complete other side of

00:55:24.440 unhealthy behavior

00:55:25.780 and and you know the one

00:55:28.580 thing that I really feel

00:55:29.720 like the body positivity

00:55:30.660 movement got right was

00:55:32.000 that like we shouldn't be

00:55:33.540 shaming people for how

00:55:36.160 they look like that that

00:55:38.220 kind of like early 2000s

00:55:39.940 tabloids thing where you

00:55:41.840 know they would blow up

00:55:42.980 images of celebrities

00:55:43.900 literally just trying to

00:55:44.820 have a vacation yeah and

00:55:46.500 be like oh my god look at

00:55:48.000 her cellulite she's gained

00:55:48.960 five pounds and and that

00:55:50.480 like the body positivity

00:55:52.540 movement absolutely hit the

00:55:54.600 no like get it on the nose

00:55:56.800 when they said like no we

00:55:58.220 shouldn't be doing that yeah

00:55:59.760 and this is kind of like

00:56:01.180 reverting back to that you

00:56:04.040 know mindset 90s early

00:56:05.740 2000s where yeah there's

00:56:08.300 gosh there's so much there

00:56:09.960 there's this comedian she

00:56:12.060 talks about how she was you

00:56:14.120 know growing up in the

00:56:14.880 70s and 80s and how she

00:56:17.700 took something called

00:56:18.540 dexatrim to lose weight and

00:56:20.820 she said it was literally

00:56:21.780 speed it was like speed that

00:56:24.720 she would take and it's a

00:56:25.660 funny bit but obviously it

00:56:27.160 was really unhealthy and I'm

00:56:28.600 even thinking I was in

00:56:30.180 college or I was in high

00:56:31.480 school you know it was

00:56:32.680 probably 2008 and my friends

00:56:34.900 and I did a special K diet

00:56:36.760 before homecoming or

00:56:38.460 something gosh so stupid we

00:56:39.560 were all probably you know

00:56:41.320 tiny anyway and we did a

00:56:43.280 special K diet that was it

00:56:45.560 was guaranteed that you

00:56:47.040 would lose you know 10

00:56:48.240 pounds in two weeks or

00:56:49.420 something like that and I'm

00:56:50.440 like of course because all

00:56:51.880 you ate was special K which

00:56:52.940 is basically air and so I

00:56:55.980 mean it swung the other

00:56:57.440 direction to where it's like

00:56:58.500 eat whatever you want look

00:57:00.020 at like whatever you want

00:57:01.200 don't work out whatever

00:57:02.120 feels good to some degree

00:57:04.880 but yeah we've got to land

00:57:06.360 somewhere in the middle

00:57:07.180 where we say it's okay to

00:57:09.080 not have a quote-unquote

00:57:10.060 perfect body you're

00:57:12.080 supposed to have body fat

00:57:13.660 you are supposed to eat

00:57:15.720 until you are satisfied

00:57:17.540 and we should be focusing on

00:57:20.240 healthy foods that nourish our

00:57:21.720 bodies not just being a

00:57:23.600 certain weight but with the

00:57:25.240 Ozempic craze it's made a

00:57:26.940 lot of people want to look

00:57:28.500 stick skinny again yeah I

00:57:30.620 think that's a really good

00:57:31.620 point to bring up because

00:57:33.080 like you know what what

00:57:36.260 Hollywood does I feel like

00:57:37.680 influencers monetize you

00:57:39.700 know when it was when it

00:57:41.800 was like the Kardashian

00:57:42.720 curves were very in style

00:57:44.940 influencers were selling

00:57:46.660 like how to get Kim

00:57:48.880 Kardashian butt work workout

00:57:50.860 programs like like one that

00:57:52.820 comes to mind for me is a girl

00:57:54.340 named Daisy Keech she's kind of

00:57:56.800 known for that like itty bitty

00:57:58.620 waist like big hips and

00:58:00.460 definitely very like strong

00:58:02.360 glutes but you know that's

00:58:04.520 kind of her natural genetics

00:58:06.020 and and you know those

00:58:07.040 influencers definitely knew

00:58:08.520 that the Kardashians had

00:58:10.260 BBLs but they were still

00:58:11.360 trying to sell you this

00:58:13.000 program that would promise

00:58:13.980 to make you look like

00:58:14.720 Kylie is a Brazilian butt

00:58:16.000 lift and that is like a

00:58:17.240 procedure yes that they

00:58:19.240 have and now the

00:58:20.400 Kardashians are a lot

00:58:21.580 skinnier than they used to

00:58:23.060 be oh yeah they I feel

00:58:24.780 like they've totally jumped

00:58:26.100 on the the weight loss

00:58:27.740 craze that we've kind of

00:58:29.760 been seeing in Hollywood

00:58:30.740 as well yeah along with

00:58:33.200 people like Sharon

00:58:34.940 Osborne has been really

00:58:36.220 vocal about her journey

00:58:38.900 with Ozempic people like

00:58:41.480 Rebel Wilson yeah and I

00:58:44.600 think Kelly Clarkson has

00:58:45.640 gotten a lot thinner but

00:58:47.940 and that's not always bad

00:58:49.300 no I'm not even personally

00:58:50.580 I'm not against Ozempic for

00:58:52.100 all people I actually think

00:58:53.340 because obesity it can be

00:58:55.460 really harmful so I'm not

00:58:56.500 against Ozempic all around

00:58:58.020 but it certainly has given

00:59:00.080 people like unrealistic

00:59:01.300 expectations yeah for weight

00:59:04.080 loss and what actually is

00:59:06.320 healthy gosh girls just have

00:59:08.560 it really hard because I

00:59:09.480 remember when it was cool

00:59:10.840 back in like the early

00:59:12.480 2000s to have part of your

00:59:14.480 belly showing in between

00:59:15.980 like your hips and your and

00:59:18.640 your belly button it was so

00:59:20.000 weird oh gosh I could never

00:59:21.680 do that because you had to

00:59:22.940 have like these little narrow

00:59:24.320 hips to do that and I could

00:59:26.000 never do that and then I

00:59:26.820 also literally abs yeah yes

00:59:29.840 and of course Christina

00:59:31.060 Aguilera and Britney Spears

00:59:32.520 had like the belly button

00:59:33.460 rings I was actually kind of

00:59:35.020 excited when the

00:59:35.900 Kardashians came on the scene

00:59:37.520 because then that meant that

00:59:38.900 not everyone was trying to

00:59:40.000 have like nine-year-old boy

00:59:41.260 hips anymore but it just goes

00:59:43.680 back and forth which just

00:59:45.020 means we really should not be

00:59:46.760 looking to social media or

00:59:48.700 cultural trends to judge

00:59:50.160 whether or not our body is

00:59:51.420 healthy totally and and like

00:59:53.300 Ozempic has has definitely

00:59:55.100 helped so many people I feel

00:59:57.120 like you know it's been used

00:59:59.240 in a clinical setting for a

01:00:01.920 lot longer than it's been like

01:00:03.680 this kind of cultural

01:00:04.540 phenomenon and it's absolutely

01:00:06.340 helped people like Western

01:00:07.740 medicine should not be

01:00:08.780 demonized yeah but you know

01:00:11.660 then you see like this kind of

01:00:14.520 resurgence of that like early

01:00:17.540 2000s 90s like heroin chic where

01:00:20.320 everybody's kind of stick thin and

01:00:21.760 and people who are already thin

01:00:23.360 are are either like dieting or

01:00:25.320 using this drug allegedly

01:00:27.560 allegedly to get that way

01:00:30.380 somebody that comes to mind is

01:00:32.640 like Ariana Grande yeah again I

01:00:35.160 don't know what's going on there

01:00:36.340 I hope she's okay I hope she's

01:00:38.260 okay too and like not to shame her

01:00:40.100 because I mean she seems really

01:00:41.680 sweet and and like a really

01:00:43.680 wonderful person in some respects

01:00:46.960 yeah not necessarily in the the

01:00:50.820 homewrecker respect but I mean it's

01:00:54.380 worrisome you know it's it's not

01:00:56.900 to like call her out it's just it's

01:00:59.580 just worrisome that that like it

01:01:01.700 seems like it's gotten to a point

01:01:03.100 where she looks like emaciated and

01:01:05.860 it's sad yeah I know and it's really

01:01:08.500 hard when that is being idolized

01:01:10.480 especially by young children and this

01:01:13.380 goes back to your you know our second

01:01:15.260 story for the day that our kids need to

01:01:18.820 be off social media and especially

01:01:20.720 like our young girls it just causes

01:01:22.280 so much anxiety but Phoenix thank you

01:01:24.540 so much for bringing this to our

01:01:25.720 attention and for telling us why it

01:01:27.680 matters because it really does I

01:01:29.320 appreciate it appreciate you Allie

01:01:31.500 thank you thank you all right guys

01:01:34.020 that's all we've got time for today

01:01:35.960 we will be back here on Monday

01:01:38.100 you

Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - March 27, 2025

Ep 1162 ｜ SkinnyTok, the iPad Pacifier & Paula White’s New Scam

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