Ep 234 | Mobsters, Self-Love, & Blaming God
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Summary
In the midst of the coronavirus pandemic, what do we do in times of fear, confusion, and anxiety? How do we explain all of that from a biblical perspective? How can we explain it from the perspective of the Word of God and the sovereignty of God?
Transcript
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hey guys welcome to relatable i hope everyone had a great weekend today we are going to do a kind of
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theology monday so what i'm going to do is i'm going to tell you a couple things we did over
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the weekend i'm going to draw some pertinent lessons out of that some things that i want us
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to think about that do have to do with everything that's going on but it's not specifically
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coronavirus related then we are going to end with what i think is a very important discussion on the
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sovereignty of god because i've seen some bad theology floating around on social media some of
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you might have seen this too and i want to correct it by going to what the word of god actually says
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about god's character rather than all of these misinterpretations and mischaracterizations that
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we unfortunately see on instagram especially in times of crisis wednesday i'm going to give you
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a more of a news update i know so many of us are over coronavirus right now and the last thing i
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want to do is to fill your mind with things that you've already heard or things that bog you down
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this episode today is so important because it seeks to reorient you if you are in a place of fear
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confusion or anxiety to remind you of what is true and hopefully give you some food for thought to
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continue um in your thinking and analysis about everything that's going on right now wednesday more of
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a news update some of the reactions that have been happening and how it shapes our culture
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friday i plan to do a full episode on toxic mommy culture which you guys have been asking me to do
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it is rampant right now on social media so i plan to do that on friday kind of already have it planned
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out but today like i said very important episode about um about the various aspects of this that we can
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analyze from a biblical perspective and then of course rightly looking at the sovereignty of god and how
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we explain all of that in the midst of a pandemic let me go ahead and start this podcast so this
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weekend we didn't do a whole lot uh we did for the first time eat out so we got takeout we got tacos
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and i was really excited about that we have not gotten takeout any kind of restaurant drive-through food
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anything like that in over three weeks which is big for us because i would say at least once a week we
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would order favor or uber eats or something like that on the weekends like we just like to get
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tacos or fajitas or something like that as you can tell we really like tex-mex and we haven't done it
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for the past few weeks just because one we've been trying to save money you never know what the future
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holds we have not wanted to go out and we haven't wanted to risk there being any kind of you know
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virus on our food or on the packaging but finally we were like you know what it's been a few weeks
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we really don't want to cook we don't want to clean dishes again so let's order some tacos so
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this is this this was my thinking when i finally was like okay yes not eating out has been good for
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the budget it's been good for the waistline but tacos are good for the soul and eventually you just
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got to break down and do what's good for the soul so we ate tacos chips queso and by the way i don't
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know if you know this but just to give you guys a heads up friend to friend this is how apparently
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i saw it on a youtube video so it has to be true apparently how you sanitize everything when you get
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takeout is uh you get your food you take it out of the packaging you put it on plates you throw all of
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the packaging away and you either wear gloves or you wash your hands later and then you put
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the food in the microwave i don't know you microwave it for 30 seconds a minute however long i'm not
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really sure about that maybe you need to look that up and then you take it out of the microwave and you
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make sure that you wash your hands and then you sanitize where any of the packaging was so that
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apparently is what you do to make sure that you don't get the rona while you are supporting all of
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your favorite restaurants so we did that and then we watched goodfellas and i know some of you out
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there like how have you not seen this movie that literally came out 30 years ago this year and it's
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a classic and it's one of those movies that everyone talks about i don't know but it was also one of
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those movies that as i was watching it i was like i've seen this before but i don't know when and i
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don't know why my husband hadn't seen it before and i wouldn't have watched it by myself so i'm not sure
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my husband i'm not sure if he would be okay with me telling you this but he actually was not a fan
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of the movie i thought it was good um i really like 80s and 90s movies just a little fun fact about
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ali i will watch pretty much any 80s and 90s movie that is somewhat reputable i like to watch movies
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that people have talked about and movies that they consider classics just to basically said say that i
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have seen it and this was one of those movies wasn't my favorite movie ever but now i can say
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for sure that i've seen it and i'm glad that i did because i learned some things in watching it that
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we are going to talk about that's pertinent to what we're going through today so some thoughts that
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i had about goodfellas now if you haven't seen goodfellas this is still going to be pertinent to you
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and we're even going to tie tie it into uh the tiger king conversation that we had on wednesday
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if you haven't listened to tiger king in the end times episode from last wednesday you should go do that
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this is kind of building on that conversation a little bit so if you've watched goodfellas if
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you've watched the sopranos any of these mobster movies uh you know that the common characteristic
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in all of these characters in these movies is ego every decision they make is based on their ego
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they want to be seen as loyal or industrious or cunning but ultimately their ego is what is driving
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them their ego overtakes all other qualities they might be striving for always leads to their
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demise in some way every single character in every single mobster movie or tv show this is true of um
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and in so doing and letting their ego drive them they go down this uh mobster path of corruption
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that virtually ends their life or literally ends their life and all of the people that are left in their
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wake are just collateral damage that's true of tiger king i mean it's like a redneck
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mob what's tiger king and these zoo keepers or these wildlife collectors are in it is like a
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redneck mom and they are doing the same thing that tony soprano the people in goodfellas did they are
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letting their ego drive their lives and drive what they do and in the end is not just corruption but
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their own demise now most of us i'm going to go so far as to say uh all of us are not mobsters we are not
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weaving some complicated web of extortion if i do have a mobster listening to this podcast you're not
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in my target demographic but i'm really glad that you're here but many of us are in our own
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seemingly innocuous ways inflating our own egos at the expense of our own good and the good of those
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around us and that's what i was thinking when i was watching goodfellas just how
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ego is constantly looking to be seen constantly defensive constantly be uh there it's constantly
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looking for attention and to get that next thing that makes it feel better that uh makes it get
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bigger whatever it is and all of us are the exact same way even if we are not mobsters uh we are told
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by these self-love promoting influencers and authors that we should be building up our ego in the same way
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that every person who has been driven by ego to commit a crime has now the end results typically
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aren't the same but they are in another sense just as devastating so glennon doyle has an entire book
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about women becoming full of themselves people ask me what i think about uh brene brown all the time i
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think brene brown has the same message as glennon doyle and rachel hollis and all of these self-love
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people that sounds inspiring but is focused on the elevation of the ego the elevation of the self
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and it's cloaked in humility it's cloaked in innocence but it is much the same message that
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you hear from crude rap songs and crude mobster movies that life is all about you and you need to
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do what builds you up and makes you happy uh these self-love influencers wrongly try to convince us that
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the higher we think of ourselves the higher self-esteem we have uh the less problems the fewer problems that
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we'll have that if we place ourselves in the center of our own universe and think of ourselves more
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highly i will have the confidence to build the lives of our dreams heal from our past traumas
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and we will finally be at peace and be satisfied i mean think about tiger king the redneck mobster
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i mean he literally one he calls himself the tiger king and he had that throne if you've seen the
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documentary he had that throne that he sat on because he wanted so badly to be the ruler of his
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universe and to be the center of his own life well we laugh at that and we say okay obviously that
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didn't end up well for joe exotic but we are being fed the same message to call ourselves queens to call
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ourselves the ruler of our universe to have people around us and ourselves bow down to us to put our
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needs and wants in front of other people uh we are told that if we do these things if we boost our ego
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if we are full of ourselves if we put ourselves first then we will be happy but if that were true
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if that were true uh the secular world would be a lot happier would be a lot more at peace than they
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actually are the fact is is that christless messages no matter how inspiring they may sound
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are always ultimately empty and are going to lead us into a cycle of more confusion and more hurt they may
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pump us up for a little while uh they may help us chase our goals like we might lose the weight we
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might organize our closet we might do the things that we set out to do uh with the help of these self
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uh self-love and self-help uh authors but they ultimately lead to our demise because they can't
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satisfy and they can't save we see very extreme demonstrations of that in these mobster movies and
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ridiculous documentaries like tiger king putting yourself first being full of yourself doing what you want to do
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uh obviously it helped them for a little while and it led to our demise but it has the same trajectory
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and the same pattern in our own lives even if the inner results aren't exactly the same it ultimately
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builds a life that hurts us and hurts those that we love and one thing that we're seeing in this pandemic
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is the absolute absurdity of the self-love culture in times of crisis because guess what we don't have time
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right now to figure out how to love ourselves before we love other people like most of us don't
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have time for non-stop self-care right now or even a little bit of self-care right now whatever that
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looks like most of us don't have the luxury of just doing what makes us happy we can't put ourselves
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first right now and if we did other people would suffer we are not the center of our universe we are very
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small right now so we see the absolute vitality of putting the needs of other people before ourselves
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i mean think about who are our heroes right now in this crisis the people putting themselves first or
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the people putting themselves last the people who for example hoard supplies to try to make a buck off
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them or the people who are selflessly giving their time giving their money and risking their health
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their health and lives to save and help others who do we admire right now the grocery store clerks
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the nurses the homeschool parents all selflessly serving those who need it or the people who are
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just focused on self-love and doing what makes them happy and self-care the people going outside because
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they don't care how it affects other people all of a sudden in the pandemic selfishness is condemned
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before we were talking about how great it was for people to just do what they want to do and to have
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good vibes now all of a sudden we're expecting people to sacrifice maybe we should have backed
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up and been encouraging self-sacrifice and consideration of other people a long time ago
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rather than telling people to place themselves at the center of their universe so one again another
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silver lining that we're seeing in this pandemic is that people are reminded of the importance of
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selflessness and not putting yourself first and considering the needs and the wants of other
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people even before yourselves uh these messages that we heard before this for a long time very
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pervasively hey just focus on you right now cut all the toxic people out of your life all the people
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that are burdens and uh burdensome just do what makes you happy all of those right now sound really
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tone deaf don't they like they sound really vapid that's because they are not just now but all the time
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because there are messages that do not deliver on their promise any life philosophy that is about
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inflating your ego serving yourself will always fail you maybe and hopefully not as drastically as it
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failed tony soprano or joe exotic but it will fail you it will end friendships it will hurt your marriage
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that is why god gives us an opposite directive don't put yourself first he says put me first he says put
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others before yourself count others as more significant than yourself philippians 2 says don't be
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so concerned with what you want and need i will take care of you god promises us you care for those
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that i've placed in your life who need it don't inflate your ego defeat your ego don't worry about
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loving yourself more you already have an innate drive to take care of yourself and meet your needs focus
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on loving me god says and loving those around you don't make much of yourself forget yourself
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what the world needs right now contrary to what glennon doyle's new book says is not women who are
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full of themselves but women and men who forget themselves who are on the front line of this pandemic
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uh characterized not by self-love and self-esteem but self-forgetfulness christians are called to
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self-forgetfulness not self-obsession not self-fulfillment not self-deprecation or self-loathing
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but self-forgetfulness uh there are two quotes that are that i've just put together to read together
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from c.s lewis's mere christianity that i think work well with what we're saying according to christian
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teachers the essential vice the utmost evil is pride on chastity anger greed drunkenness and all that
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are mere flea bites in comparison it was through pride that the devil became the devil pride leads
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to every other vice it is the complete anti-god state of mind the christians are right it is pride
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which has been the chief cause of misery in every nation and every family since the world began and
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man that is so true in all of our lives like think about every fight that you've gotten in
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think about all the times that your feelings have been unnecessarily hurt think about all of the harsh
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words that you have said that later you regret think about uh all of the conflicts that you see going
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around not just in your life and and in your community but on a greater scale so much of them
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have their foundations and pride and yet we are hearing from a large community of people
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online and uh in books that pride is actually a virtue rather than a vice but i'm telling you
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just as it did for joe exotic and all the characters and good fellas it doesn't lead to a satisfying life
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and one thing like i said that this pandemic is revealing to us is just how empty these messages
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attempting to inflate the ego are how shallow and misleading they are how unsatisfying and unadmirable
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they are um all of that came from me telling you what we did this weekend watching good fellas uh
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but another thing we did since my husband is so sad not to have sports to watch right now we watched
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the masters the masters golf tournaments we we both like golf he likes golf more than i do but
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i do enjoy watching golf i'll really watch and enjoy any sport but i actually understand golf more
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than i do football for example so i enjoy watching golf we watched the masters tournaments from 2010
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and 2004 he's a big phil mickelson fan on saturday so that's super exciting but one thing that i was
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thinking about so just drawing some more lessons out of our very non-eventful weekend for us uh one thing
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that i was thinking about as we were watching is that it's funny to watch something like that at that
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that at that moment was so important to the people who were involved so anxiety inducing not knowing
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who is going to win what the next shot is going to look like the players and audience anticipating
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every move and us sitting there knowing exactly what's about to happen my husband even remembering
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some of the shots that were hit and of course this is true of every replay you watch every book you
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reread every piece of history that you study the participants and the characters or players
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are in the moment you're outside of it and even though you might feel their excitement you're not
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worried about the outcome because you know what's going to happen um and as we were watching these
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tournaments i was reminded that everything we currently feel uh and fear and worry about right now
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will pass we will one day be looking back on it like we were watching the 2010 masters we will someday
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and get on the other side of this and say i had no idea what was going on but looking back from the
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outside i can see that it worked out maybe not how we wanted it to maybe not as easily or as quickly
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as we would have liked but this will end this is just a season i know it feels indefinite and honestly
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i don't know how long it's going to last we keep getting conflicting reports i don't know what this
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quarantine is going to look like or what the results going to be or what troubles we have ahead but it's not
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going to last forever the phrase that you have heard people say a dozen times a week it seems like
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on the news and on social media this too shall pass is true it is absolutely true it will but we as
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christians don't just take comfort in the fact that time is passing that one day we will look back on
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this and be able to read the shots and know who's going to win to go along with our analogy
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um we're not just going to be able to say yeah that time passed and we got out of that season we
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can take comfort not just in thinking about the future but in knowing that right now as i've
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reminded us so many times that god is actively working he is actively doing he's actively using
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actively bringing himself glory and bringing all things together for our good as romans 8 28 says that
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he is doing something even when we can't see it even when we're not sure even when it feels as if
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things are falling apart around us we know that he is holding things together and uh just like we
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weren't anxious when we were watching the masters god is not anxious watching this unfold because
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he is outside of it he knows what's going to happen and even more than that he is in control of all of
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it um and i want to get into a note on how people are avoiding that fact that people are avoiding god's
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control and they are spinning it into a theological misconception that has a lot of dangerous
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implications so right now as we've talked about it's a time that is ripe for conspiracy theories and
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false prophecies which neither of which glorify the lord uh but they're also an opportunity these
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crazy chaotic times for bad theology in general um i have seen a refrain that i see almost every time
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terror uh terror strikes or we get into some kind of bad situation and it is don't blame god for this
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this is not god's fault um i saw a meme that was created i assume by an atheist
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that uh it was funny from their perspective i mean i kind of laughed even though it's terribly
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blasphemous but it was a picture of jesus looking at the earth and it said here's some coronavirus i
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love you so much lol obviously making fun of the idea that you know we serve a good god why would a
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good god send coronavirus and there were a lot of well-meaning christians in the comments saying no
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this isn't god's fault this is not his will and my reaction to that is uh how is it that
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atheists understand god's character better than professing christians god does not need you to
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let him off the hook god doesn't need to be excused or justified or covered for or explained he doesn't
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need to be made simpler for the unbeliever he doesn't need to be more accommodating to the atheist he
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doesn't need to be made softer for the agnostic he is sovereign he is in control if not even a sparrow
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falls out of the sky without his permission which is what the bible says then you can bet a pandemic
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doesn't escape his will either uh there are things that god actively causes and then there are things
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that god permits but there is nothing that god does not have the power to stop what is far more
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terrifying to me than a god who is in complete control is a god who is not i would rather have a
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completely sovereign god who i don't understand than a limited weak god who fits nicely inside my own
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mental box i don't want to worship a powerless god i don't want to bow down to a god who's limited by my
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own comprehension or who follows my self-contrived dictates of what's good and what's bad i want to
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worship the god of isaiah 55 whose ways are not my ways whose thoughts are not my thoughts let's read
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that isaiah 55 8-10 for my thoughts are not your thoughts neither are your ways my ways declares the
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lord for as the heavens are higher than the earth so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts
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than your thoughts for as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return and do not
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return there but water the earth making it bring forth and sprout giving seed to the sower and bread
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to the eater so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth it shall not return to me empty but it
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shall accomplish that which i purpose and shall succeed in the thing for which i sent it this is true of
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all god does and all god allows jeremiah 32 17 says our lord god it is you who have made the heavens
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and the earth by your great power and by your outstretched arm nothing is too hard for you job 42
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2 one of my favorite verses i know that you can do all things and that no purpose of yours can be
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thwarted so we don't know whether god purposely sent this virus to call us to repentance to
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display judgment to show mercy to those he wanted to take out of the world or whether he simply
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has allowed this virus to occur but either way it didn't just slip through the cracks god didn't sit
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back and say oh i can't believe i allowed this to happen i've said this a million times i'll probably
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say it a million more god is not surprised uh his power is not restrained our our roles and our
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responsibilities might be suspended but his aren't we are quarantined but god is not we are contained
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but god is not he is not wondering if we are going to figure this out he is not thrown off he's not
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taking it back and it doesn't matter whether or not a non-believer thinks god is a meaning for
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coronavirus we know the truth that beyond our finite weak understanding god is good he is faithful he is
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loving he is compassionate and he is totally and completely sovereign um i've said this many times
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to explain god's sovereignty but it is uh it's important to i think understand the quandary that
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unbelievers think that we are in and that they are in we have a hard time all of us as humans but
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especially non-believers not starting from the premise of the word of god being inerrant and god being
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true uh have a hard time understanding how god can be these three things at the same time so good
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powerful and seen how can god be totally good completely capable and wholly aware of everything
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that's going on the non-believers contention is that god can only be two of these things and the
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logic of that goes like this if god is all good and all powerful then he must not see all the bad that's
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going on or else he'd do something about it if god does see everything that goes on and he is good
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he must not be all powerful he must not be able to stop it or else he would do something about the
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bad stuff he would stop the bad stuff from happening or if god is all powerful and he does see everything
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then he must not be good because if he were he would stop these bad things from happening so this is
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the quandary that non-believers pose and unfortunately professing christians try to
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wiggle their way out of by diminishing one of these three attributes by saying it's not god's god's fault
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which is diminishing the attribute of power they are well-meaning christians trying to square this
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circle uh trying to fix this quandary by saying okay yes god is good god is all-knowing but he's not
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responsible for the bad things that happen satan is is the typical answer but this is bad theology
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even atheists understand that this is bad theology satan does have power but never outside of god's
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permission we read that in job so we as christians we start with the premise that god is who he says he is
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which is good powerful and all-knowing and through that filter we see all that happens all that we don't
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understand will ultimately be for his glory and the good of those who love him which is what the bible
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says like he told him back he is doing something that we would not believe if he told us it is not
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our job to let god off the hook or to make him more chewable for atheists uh let the word of god stand
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let god's character stand don't downplay god don't water him down don't apologize for him he is enough he's
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the only being in the entire universe uh who can actually claim that he is exactly who he says he is
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and no less and he is exactly what he says we need and no less than that and either you introduce
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people to this god in all his complexity in all his sovereignty or you introduce them to a figment of
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your imagination a weak wizard with limited power i don't want to worship a weak wizard with limited power do you
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because a god that is limited by our understanding of what he should and shouldn't do isn't a god that
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can save the real biblical triune god can and will save and the great news is is that he won't allow
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evil to go unpunished just because evil happens under god's sovereign watch does not mean that he is
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ignoring it that he likes it that it pleases him it might be all under his grand sovereign will but it is
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not a part of his moral will he does not desire it and he will still punish it just because he allows
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and sometimes even causes pain doesn't mean that he does not care about it on the contrary god is a god
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of vengeance and he will pay back evil what it is due he will defeat the wicked forever no act no word
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of evil escapes his attention or his judgment as psalm 37 12 through 15 i love psalm 37 i highly
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encourage you to read it if you need comfort a reminder of who god is and what he will do as
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psalm 37 12 through 15 says this the wicked plots against the righteous and gnashes his teeth at him
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but the lord laughs at the wicked for he sees that his day is coming the wicked draw the sword and bend
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their bows to bring down the poor and needy to slay those whose way is upright their sword shall enter
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their own heart and their bows shall be broken romans 12 19 says beloved never avenge yourselves but
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leave it to the wrath of god for it is written vengeance is mine i will repay says the lord so
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no evil will go unpaid for god promises us that and about our pain and all of the pain that christians
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are enduring scripture says this the lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed
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in spirit psalm 34 18 and even beyond that uh one day all sadness will be completely eradicated
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revolution of revolution revelation 21 4 says he will wipe away every tear from their eyes and death
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shall be no more neither shall there be mourning nor crying nor pain anymore for the former things have
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passed away yes we have a sovereign god we also have a redemptive god who is powerful enough right now
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to be in control of everything that's going on that means he is powerful enough to save to the uttermost
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and to save ultimately that is why we don't have to let god off the hook because god in all of his
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complex complexity and all of his character that we do not understand doesn't need to be
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diminished it's unnecessary and this is why theology matters this is why reading god's word matters
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because it affects not just our mentality in a crisis but our mentality also affects what we do
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god doesn't want us to be afraid he doesn't want us to be anxious he doesn't want us to think that he
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is not in control he is in control now and forever and we can trust in that okay that's my episode for
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today i will be back here on wednesday and i will see you guys then