Ep 879 ｜ Do Christians Idolize Sports？ ｜ Q&A
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Summary
In this episode, Allie answers your questions about college, post-grad life, and sports jerseys in church. Allie grew up in a Christian home in Dallas, TX and went to a Christian high school. She grew up believing that God had a plan for her life, but she didn t know what that plan was until she graduated college and was faced with the question, "What should I do with my life now that I'm out of college?"
Transcript
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I've also got some advice if you are a mom going from one kid to two kids.
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What do I think about Christians being Orkin donors?
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Do I think wearing sports jerseys in church is okay?
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We are answering all of these questions and many more on today's episode of Relatable.
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It's brought to you by our friends at Good Ranchers.
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We are back with another Q&A episode answering all of your very interesting questions, some
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of them personal advice questions, some of them theological questions.
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Post-grad advice about to be a senior in college and will need to decide where to live and work.
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It was spring of my senior year of college, and I still didn't know what I was going to
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I was trying to decide whether to take a pretty well-paying internship, but that was only guaranteed
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through the summer back in the city where I'm from in Dallas, or take a full-time job that
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was offered to me that was not very much money, but it was a full-time job in a totally different
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And so they were both in public relations, and I remember trying to figure out what I
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I ultimately decided to go to Athens, and the Lord had his hand there.
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A few months after I moved to Athens, I met my husband.
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But I remember being in that position, and my parents told me the same thing they told
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me when I was paralyzed by the choice of what college to go to.
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What college is going to lead me in the right direction?
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And I remember my Bible teacher saying this, and I'm not sure that I would phrase it this
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way, but this Bible teacher, when I was a junior in high school, had a really big impact
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on me just because he said things that were really intriguing and made me think about the
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Bible and Christianity in a way that I hadn't before.
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He said something that my parents kind of reiterated, but in a more, I think, theologically correct
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But he said, God does not care where you go to college.
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Is that where you choose to go to college is not going to obliterate God's plan for your
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And the same is true of what you choose about post-grad.
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As long as you are not choosing something in sin, as long as your motivations aren't selfish,
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you aren't stupid, silly, you're not following some guy that wants nothing to do with you.
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As long as you are making a decision using the tools of wisdom and discernment and logic that
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you have been given, as long as you are at least trying to choose something that aligns
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as best as you can with your strengths, then it's not that God doesn't care.
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But again, the truth behind that, I think, is important that God is going to accomplish
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It's not like God is so weak and so flippant and so flappable that we, with all of our power
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Now, even though I've written every single day of your life before any of them came to
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be, as I said in Psalm 139, now I have no idea what I'm going to do.
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Oh my gosh, I'm going to have to come in and clean up this mess.
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That doesn't mean that we can't sin or can't make mistakes.
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He has planned out every single day of your life before any of them came to be.
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He knows exactly what choice you're going to make.
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He knows exactly how these days and how these connections that you're going to make and
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opportunities are all going to fit together and are going to lead you to every future
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How my parents put it, which I think is also very comforting, is that it's not jail.
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The future job that you are choosing is not jail.
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And then maybe you made a mistake or maybe it was right for just a little while and then
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I'm not talking about being unreliable, but you don't have to stay in the job that you
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choose or the city that you choose right after college forever.
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You are not writing a contract written in blood.
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And if an employer tries to make you do that, that's probably a red flag that you shouldn't
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But it's OK to make a decision based on the information and the convictions that you have.
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And then if in a couple months you make a different decision, take it as it comes.
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And if you don't know after college, that's OK, too.
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Here's my other piece of advice that I would say.
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You do not have to have the rest of your life figured out.
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The next job that you take may very well be very different from the career path that you
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have or the life path that you have in the future.
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You are not picking your dream job right out of college.
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It will be extremely difficult for you or anyone to find the job that matches all of your
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strengths, that fits all of your priorities, that helps you strike that perfect work-life
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I think that's what a lot of college students think that they can get right out of school.
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You don't know if it's the right thing for you.
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Of course, then I didn't really have that much of a concept of podcasts.
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The only conservative media I knew really was like what people put on Facebook and, of
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And in college, I didn't really have a sense of how I would pursue that, how it would manifest
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What at the time was the next right thing in faith?
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I gave the speech at my college graduation and I just I felt in my bones.
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This is what I want to do for the rest of my life.
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And I had no idea how I was going to get there.
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Even a couple of years into my first job, I had no idea how I was going to get there.
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I could not have predicted all the steps that I would have taken to get to what I'm doing
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I simply took the opportunity that was in front of me and allowed God to lead me.
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Tips for, I think it's meant to say, for going from one kid to two kids.
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I always feel when I ask these questions, I'm like, have I answered that?
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Sometimes I get similar questions, but OK, this is what I would say.
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And I have definitely said this on a Q&A, but maybe it was to a different question.
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I think ensuring that your first child is sleeping through the night is very, very helpful when
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I am an advocate of certain types of sleep training.
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I'm not going to get into all of that because I did that on another Q&A that maybe already came
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I'm not talking about allowing your child to just like cry out in desperation for hours
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But the fact that our first child by six months was sleeping through the night, sleeping 12
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hours a night, that absolutely made us ready to start trying for a second.
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I don't think if I had like a toddler that was up multiple times a night, I'm not sure that
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I would have wanted to add a second one when we did.
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And so now both of our kids sleep through the night.
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And so we feel more prepared for a newborn because we know that we are going to be getting
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But at least we can rest assured that most nights anyway, our other kids will be sleeping
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soundly and we won't have to go back and forth.
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I think sleep is so important for everyone in the family.
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I know a lot of people are completely anti-sleep training.
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Look, I think getting the best sleep that you possibly can, helping your kids get the best
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sleep that they possibly can is better for everyone's relationship, better for everyone's
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brain development, better for everyone's sanity, better for your marriage, better for your
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Yes, I think that everyone getting as much sleep as possible, especially if you're thinking
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about adding on another child is very necessary.
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The other piece of advice, do not be discouraged if your oldest child is not super excited about
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I had seen so many videos, so many portrayals on social media of the oldest child just immediately
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falling in love with their younger sibling and being so nurturing and loving.
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Our oldest had a really hard time welcoming the second in because the second one cried all the
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time and demanded all of, not all of, but a lot of mommy's attention.
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She did not like the chaos that the baby caused and like the change in routine and just how
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our house and responsibilities and roles shifted.
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And it's taken her a while to kind of get used to her and be okay with her and learned how
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It took three weeks for it to not just be, oh my gosh, when one of them cries, everyone
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And then I will also say every year gets better.
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Really just now at four and two, are they kind of in that, oh, I love you.
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That doesn't mean that it's perfect all the time.
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But starting to like really voluntarily share and play with each other.
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Your oldest child still needs to know that they are your baby too.
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I heard this on a podcast and this really helped me.
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I think I thought that, you know, all toddlers want to hear, you're such a big girl or big
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But they also need to hear that they're still your baby.
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That you are still thinking about them and caring for them.
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And I think the podcaster who said this was right.
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And that don't rush your oldest in growing up just because you're adding on a baby that's
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Let them know that they are still your baby too during that time.
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So yeah, that's one piece of advice that I have.
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How do I find community that shares your values as a young single woman?
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Look, I know that that's got to be really hard.
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I have some wonderful Christian friends who are single women.
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And if you don't have like strong friendships from high school and college, which don't feel
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bad about that if you don't, a lot of people don't or you don't have strong friendships
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from work, which can be like a little bit complicated.
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Uh, then like, I understand it can be really hard and it can be really lonely and you can
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feel like your coworkers or the people around you or the people that you meet at your workout
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class, they just don't, they don't think the same way you do.
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And in a hyper-polarized world where you can like immediately pick up on what side someone
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is on based on like the language they use, it can be really, really tough.
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And so I, of course, would encourage you to join a local church.
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And maybe the masters or master seminary resource for that.
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They have like these church search links where you can go on there.
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You can type in your zip code and it'll tell you some solid churches in your area.
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I know we've got some differing opinions on BSF.
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I'm not a part of BSF, but I have some friends who are, and they really, really love it.
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So, and I would try to, when you find a good local church, I would also try to really plug
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in and to start going to a Bible study and to make sure that you're involved.
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Um, I would also maybe volunteer to your local pregnancy center.
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It doesn't have to be your local pregnancy center, although there just happens to be like
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If there's like a women's night at your local church, I would go to that.
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You could even go to a woman in the women's ministry and say, look, I don't have any Christian
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Um, but gosh, I, in like older women, if, or just any women in the church, and I'm speaking
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to myself too, like if anyone ever comes to you and says, I need friends, or if you notice
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that someone in your church doesn't have friends, they just don't know where to sit.
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And again, talking to myself too, because I think all of us are so caught up in making
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sure we have friends and we have community and we have encouragement and we're surrounding
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ourselves and our kids have friends and we get so busy that we forget that there could
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be people in our church who are lonely and look, maybe it's the person that we think is
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a little weird or we think is a little off or we just don't click with them.
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They don't offer us anything in friendship, which I know it sounds so horrible to say those
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But if we're honest, you know, we've all kind of like thought these things before, but
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the church really shouldn't be a place for that.
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Um, and so if you notice that in your church, reach out to that person, take initiative and
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not just, Hey, I want to get coffee with you once.
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So you can check it off your list, but invite them, invite them to things, include them in
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And again, I'm preaching to myself here because we can all do better at noticing those people.
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But if you are that person who is in a position of loneliness, I encourage you to be vulnerable
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And look, I'm not guaranteeing that that experience will be easy.
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Unfortunately, churches, just like any other institution are filled with imperfect people,
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busy people, distracted people, selfish people.
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Um, and so I understand like my husband and I have been in a situation where we've been
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We've really sought community and everywhere we turned.
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They made it as difficult as possible to join a community group and to like make Christian
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I still have, I mean, I hope I'm not hanging on to bitterness towards that church, but I
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And so try, try though, try, put yourself out there and try, go where other Christians
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How to support your husband as he is a spiritual leader.
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So the first thing that came to mind was first Peter three, one through two, likewise, wives
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be subject to your own husband so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be one
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without a word by the conduct of their wives when they see your respectful and pure conduct.
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So if your husband is already a natural spiritual leader, maybe he is ahead of you in his theological
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and biblical understanding, this can be pretty easy to follow them because they are kind of
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in a role of like teaching things to you, interpreting scripture for you, helping you along, making
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sure that you're praying, that you're in the word.
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But that's not true for a lot of marriages because women, I think, are just kind of were
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And I think in general, we tend to make more time to study scripture.
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We are just more adept at understanding things with words.
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And so I think very often it's the woman who is reading her Bible more.
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She's more likely to be to have kind of a discipleship mentorship situation going on or to be a part
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Women are just different, whereas the man, he might be more busy working or he's compartmentalizing.
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He wakes up early to work out or to play golf or things like that.
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And maybe he's reading the Bible, but he just hasn't spent as much time in the word as the
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I know a lot of women who are in that situation, and yet the Bible does not say that we are
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to decide who is the spiritual leader in marriage depending on who knows the Bible more, depending
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on who is more theologically adept, depending on who prays more.
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Actually, that first Peter passage is really hard to swallow, but it's there.
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It's there that the husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ is the head of the
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Now, a wife should never sin to follow her husband because she follows the Lord first,
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but she is to look to him as a leader in the family.
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And if he is a Christian, he's supposed to be the spiritual leader in the family.
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So I think this first Peter passage applies in that if your husband, he doesn't know as
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much about the Bible as you do, and he's really not in a position to lead you biblically,
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the encouragement that we can give him is through our example, not through nagging, not
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through argument, not through tearing down, which all of us fall prey to, men and women,
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but through our prayer and through our example and through how we're following the Lord, the
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patience that we have with our children, the peace that we have when we are parenting or
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going through our day-to-day lives, how we handle conflict, how we handle stress, how
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we handle our friendships, how we serve other people, how much we know about the Bible, not
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in a braggadocious way, but in a humble way, and also just in praying for him and encouraging
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And when you do see those examples of spiritual leadership pointing it out, even allowing him,
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and I know this is tough, especially for you women out there who are like, you're like
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seminary level, theologian level, allowing your husband opportunities to read through
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And if you have a genuine question, I'm not talking about playing dumb, but have a genuine
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question, allowing him to answer that question or to think through that question.
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I've never heard about that before, or I've never thought about that in that way before.
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Again, not playing dumb, but giving your husband the opportunity to think through those things.
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I'm speaking to someone who loves the Bible, who there's so much that I don't know about
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the Bible, but who knows the Bible pretty well and who has read a lot of theology.
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And yeah, so this is a practice for all of us as women, especially those of us who read
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This is something that we are called to be submissive in.
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And it's, yeah, it's a practice that we put into place.
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Maybe I would need to know a little bit more about why Christians could not be organ donors.
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Now, I don't know that you should put organ donor on your license.
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I have heard about this, that this is not, that you shouldn't do this.
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I don't remember all the reasons why, but I think it's because basically that gives them
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license to take any and all of your organs and then donate them, like even your, like
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But if you have it on your license, I don't know.
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Maybe you could debunk that myth, but I have heard that you shouldn't put it on your license.
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But if like you wanted to donate a kidney to someone, then yeah, I think that's totally
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I don't think that there is any like biblical, biblical reason not to do that.
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I, I, I'm not really, I don't know if this is good or bad, but I guess I don't really think
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I just know that he is orchestrating all things together for the good of those who love him
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I mean, sometimes I'm like, wow, that connection was incredible.
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Or just little things that come with like travel and my kids.
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I'm like, wow, I feel like God really worked that out.
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But really, I feel like it's just a daily communion and relationship with God.
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There are plenty of things that I pray for that he doesn't do in accordance to what I
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think he should do, or doesn't answer how I think he should.
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But I mean, everything that I do, whether it's just giving me children, whether it's giving
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me the opportunity to talk to you guys through this platform that I see all as the hand of
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Um, let's see a thoughts on Christian idolization of, or I think idolatry of sports.
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I don't know if there's any biblical mandate against wearing sports gear to church.
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I would, I would be open to discussion and debate on that.
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I'd be open to someone giving me the reason why you should not wear sports gear to church.
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I mean, I guess if you're wearing like the jersey of the NFL team that's playing later,
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then it's kind of showing like, this is my real Sunday plan.
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This is what I'm really looking forward to today.
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Can't wait till the sermon ends so I can get back on my recliner and watch the Eagles,
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Um, but I don't know that there's, that that's necessarily a sin.
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I don't know that that's necessarily indicative of that person idolizing sports.
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Now, do I think that there is Christian idolatry of sports?
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I think that there is idolatry of, there can be idolatry of anything among people who profess
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I think that there is probably a bigger temptation towards idolatry of youth sports because you
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can kind of excuse idolatry of your child's athletic success with love.
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Like you can say, well, I'm just loving my child.
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And so you allow sports and tournaments and competitions to take precedence over church,
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to take precedence over regular family time, to take precedence over community, to take
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precedence over rest, to take precedence over academics, all of these things.
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So I do think that there could be some idolatry there for sure.
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How do I know when it's the right time to talk to my daughters about sex and puberty?
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So you're talking to someone who has very young kids.
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So I am not going to pretend like I have all the answers.
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Um, I think that there are, I mean, there are a lot of Christian resources out there about
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What I have read and what I've heard about this, because this is something that we're already
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thinking about is that you need to talk to them about it before they come to talk to
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If you can, that's not going to be true for everything.
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For example, your three-year-old son might maybe four or five-year-old son might pull
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a tampon out of your purse and say, what's that?
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And so you have a conversation, a non-shame filled conversation about what it is in age
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appropriate terms, maybe before you are ready to.
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But when it comes to sex and puberty and those things, you do not want your children to be
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introduced to those subjects by their peers, by their peer siblings, by their teachers.
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You want to be, if you can, the person to introduce those topics to them.
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Whoever gets to those topics first tends to have the most influence and authority over what
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And so you want to be the first one to start laying the groundwork.
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And I would also say from what I've read that you don't have to talk about everything at
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You don't have to sit down and make it this, and actually I've seen recommendations against
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doing this, sit down and make it this big conversation.
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You don't necessarily have to go out of town and talk about it and make it very serious.
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Maybe that works for you, or maybe that really just kind of creates a lot of embarrassment
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among your kids, and you can talk about it in a way that's more casual.
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You talk about one subject at a time, depending on their maturity, depending on their understanding,
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There are a lot of variables that come with that.
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But what you need to make sure of is that you are thoroughly educated in not just the topic,
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And that you are, if you can, be the first one to bring it up.
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You don't have to know everything about every subject to talk to them about it.
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You're just two human beings with a relationship talking about something that is a fact of life,
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and that also for the Christian has spiritual significance as well.
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So they're very important topics, but they don't have to be heavy and sad and sorrowful
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topics, because there shouldn't be a whole lot of shame and embarrassment that comes
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Um, so that's just, that's the only encouragement I have when I get there.
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I'm Allie Beth Stuckey's father, and I'm here to bring you some news updates.
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I also want to thank you for all the kind messages that you've sent Allie relating to the new baby,
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and everything is going well, so thank you for continuing to have her and her family in your prayers.
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I know that you're enjoying the episodes that she recorded prior to going on maternity leave,
00:28:04.940
and she's got several more good ones coming, including the one that you listened to today.
00:28:10.080
A couple of news items is there was a poll taken by ABC News and the Washington Post,
00:28:17.240
whereby President Trump had a nine-point lead over President Biden.
00:28:20.960
This was pretty surprising to most people that read the poll, and possibly it was an outlier poll
00:28:25.980
that just happened to get a hold of a lot of people that were tending to be more Trump than Biden.
00:28:33.160
But it was a poll that was equally divided between Democrats, Republicans, and also some independents.
00:28:39.340
Part of that poll also said that 75 percent of the people polled felt that President Biden was too old to run for office again.
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And another interesting point was that President Trump had a 20-point lead in voters under age 35.
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We'll have a link to the show notes of this episode relating to this poll that you can find out more details on.
00:29:05.200
The economy continues to move along, and inflation remains stubborn.
00:29:09.820
In fact, energy prices were up 5.6 percent last month, in my opinion, in large part due to President Biden's team
00:29:19.140
shutting down places where we can drill for oil and gas and refusing to issue new leases on places
00:29:26.160
where we already have been leasing and drilling in the past.
00:29:33.160
Food is up just a little bit, although it's still considerably higher than it was two years ago.
00:29:37.660
The unemployment rate is a bit of good news in that it's at 3.7 percent, which is essentially full employment in the United States.
00:29:45.840
However, what's not in that number is the number of people that have actually left the workforce and are no longer looking for work.
00:29:54.000
And that's why only 62 percent of the people eligible to work actually work.
00:29:59.900
And there are people, maybe they're living off of government assistance or what have you and not looking for work anymore.
00:30:08.100
So it's a little bit misleading, but it's about where it has been in pretty good economic times.
00:30:14.900
The immigration is one of our biggest problems.
00:30:17.860
However, if you look under the U.S. Census Bureau statistics, where most of these stats on the economy come from,
00:30:25.060
immigration is up 168 percent since President Biden took office.
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And this includes legal and illegal immigration estimates.
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And you and I both know that's not sustainable.
00:30:38.280
We need to have immigration laws that make it reasonable for people to come here legally,
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but that we shut off our borders to all illegal crossings.
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And why in the world that's not something that's bipartisan that can get done?
00:30:54.040
Interestingly enough, immigration, illegal immigration was down 2017 through 2019 during the Trump administration.
00:31:05.700
Also want to talk a little bit more about President Trump and the story that came out recently that's very concerning.
00:31:11.340
And that was his interview on Meet the Press, where he basically stated that a six week ban on abortion was a terrible idea.
00:31:19.820
I mean, DeSantis is willing to sign a five week and six week ban.
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I think what he did is a terrible thing and a terrible mistake.
00:31:28.460
Now, this was a political attack against Ron DeSantis because he signed one of those in Florida.
00:31:33.460
But other states such as Texas have those as well.
00:31:36.680
And he also, President Trump, would also not commit to a federal 15 week ban on abortion.
00:31:43.600
It actually leads me to believe that President Trump does not have a strong conviction on this issue.
00:31:50.260
Because when you don't have a strong conviction on this issue, you can be wishy-washy and you're trying to appeal to different audiences.
00:31:58.320
And either you're pro-life or you're not, President Trump.
00:32:02.340
Be transparent with us so that we can know how we want to vote relating on that issue.
00:32:14.280
There's a 10-year-old boy and his 11-year-old sister that stole their mother's car.
00:32:19.700
And I say stole because it wasn't theirs, obviously.
00:32:22.180
And drove it 200 miles on the way from Florida to California because they were mad because their mother took away all their screen devices for a period of time.
00:32:32.020
So can you imagine when the police stopped them and this 10-year-old boy and 11-year-old sister got out of the car?
00:32:42.220
Not sure what the punishment was, but that should remind us that if we have young children to make sure our car keys are put away somewhere where they can't find them.
00:32:50.340
And then finally, I wanted to mention a movie that we've talked about before that's coming out called The Blind.
00:33:00.340
And it is about fellow Blaze host, podcast host, Phil Robertson.
00:33:11.740
And it is an incredible story of redemption that I know you're going to want to see.
00:33:15.340
You can go see it in your local theaters, but I encourage you to go to theblind.com and go ahead and buy your tickets now because independent films need strong ticket sales up front to have as wide a distribution as possible.
00:33:28.580
And my final, final word for you is, is that in your personal life, whether you're a man or a woman, you need mentors.
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And you need mentors in all the different areas of your life.
00:33:40.840
I talk about this in my book, Life Lessons from the Little Red Wagon, and that if you need we need a spiritual mentor, we need a business mentor, we need a relationship mentor, we need a personal financial mentor.
00:33:54.080
And we might even need some a physical mentor that helps us with maybe our our diet and our our physical activity and what have you.
00:34:04.560
I always sought out mentors that in that specific area, I could tell were further along in their walk than I was, whether that was their spiritual walk or their business walk or their personal financial walk.
00:34:16.280
And yes, it made me uncomfortable sometimes and being transparent with them.
00:34:26.960
But seeking out those mentors is very, very important.
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There's a lot of wisdom that is stored up in the minds and the hearts and the souls of people that are senior to you.
00:34:40.780
And I encourage you to seek those out no matter where you are in life.
00:34:46.640
And thank you for supporting Relatable Podcast.
00:34:49.720
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00:35:02.720
Hey, guys, if you love this podcast, please leave us a five star review wherever you listen on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify.
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