Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 941 ｜ Conceived in Rape, Chosen by God ｜ Guest： Steventhen Holland

00:00:01.000 Conceived in rape and given up for adoption at seven days old, Stephen Thin Holland has

00:00:06.600 an incredible testimony that points to God's faithfulness and his redemption.

00:00:12.580 He's going to tell us of his story of adoption, of finding out how he was conceived, how he

00:00:19.040 was born, who his mother is.

00:00:20.880 And oh my goodness, you are going to shed so many tears, happy tears and sad tears.

00:00:26.280 But most of all, you are going to be encouraged as you are reminded of how good and how powerful

00:00:34.160 God is.

00:00:35.240 I'm so excited for you to hear Stephen Thin's story.

00:00:38.920 This episode is brought to you by our friends at Good Ranchers.

00:00:41.060 Go to GoodRanchers.com.

00:00:42.160 Use code Allie at checkout. 1.00

00:00:43.320 That's GoodRanchers.com, code Allie.

00:00:45.060 Stephen Thin, thanks so much for taking the time to join us.

00:00:57.680 I really appreciate it.

00:00:58.880 You're welcome.

00:00:59.600 Yeah.

00:00:59.880 So I first saw your testimony in a live action Instagram post, and I thought, wow, this person,

00:01:07.320 one, you're very compelling as you're sharing your testimony, but what an awesome story of

00:01:11.680 God's redemption.

00:01:12.240 So I just wanted to bring you here to get the extended version of your testimony.

00:01:17.300 So let's go back to the beginning.

00:01:20.460 Let's talk about it.

00:01:21.640 And most people don't go all the way back to their conception when they're talking about

00:01:25.120 their testimony, but you do.

00:01:26.900 Yeah.

00:01:27.680 Well, it started as an eight-year-old little boy, you know, at school, I had some friends

00:01:32.280 of mine make fun of me because of my skin color.

00:01:35.160 And what they said was, you're weird and different.

00:01:38.320 And I'm like, what do you mean?

00:01:39.460 And they said, well, you're the wrong color.

00:01:41.120 And I looked at my hand and I started thinking about my family and I'm like, hey, they're

00:01:45.760 white and I'm not, I'm brown.

00:01:48.080 So I had this moment like, you know, why would they say that?

00:01:51.960 It kind of hurt to be honest, but I come home and I'm sitting on the edge of the bed with

00:01:56.600 my mom.

00:01:57.080 So I've got some questions, right?

00:01:58.380 Like, I'm not the same as you.

00:02:00.540 So sitting on the edge of the bed with my mom that night as an eight-year-old little

00:02:05.040 boy, I found out that I was actually adopted, but at seven days old, they brought me into

00:02:10.940 their home as a foster child.

00:02:12.500 I was on the same bottle of formula I left the hospital with. 0.93

00:02:15.360 I was literally so weak that I couldn't suck a bottle.

00:02:18.220 So this family, again, I always say that love goes deeper than color, deeper than DNA, deeper

00:02:24.500 than blood, because I wasn't any of those things, you know, related to them, but they

00:02:29.740 loved me the same.

00:02:31.000 Just they saw me as their son and they took me in and this family literally squeezed milk

00:02:35.660 in my mouth to save my life.

00:02:37.360 Um, I was very, you know, malnutrition.

00:02:40.040 So my legs were drawn up into my body.

00:02:42.360 Um, they, they literally would, uh, take my legs and, and stretch them out and massage 0.92

00:02:48.060 my legs.

00:02:48.760 This family literally, literally saved my life.

00:02:50.840 And why were you malnourished?

00:02:52.580 Uh, because of, uh, well, we didn't know who my mom was at the time yet.

00:02:58.880 Um, there was some speculation that she might have some mental, uh, challenges.

00:03:03.560 So I was not fed.

00:03:05.000 Um, so I literally, again, seven days old, but I was on the bottle that I left the hospital

00:03:10.260 with.

00:03:10.700 So, um, you know, and I, and, um, so it, it's, it's crazy.

00:03:17.400 They, um, they, they teased that when I was little, that I was like a little bulldog because

00:03:22.320 my legs early on, because of that, um, malnourishment, um, my leg, you know, I had, I walked bow

00:03:28.560 legged, you know?

00:03:29.960 So I find that out at eight years old.

00:03:32.640 Right.

00:03:33.220 And that's all, you know, at that point.

00:03:34.800 That's all I know that your, your adoptive parents said, okay, yeah, this is why you

00:03:38.900 look a little different than us.

00:03:40.220 You're adopted.

00:03:41.020 Here's what it looked like when you first came to us.

00:03:43.680 But at that point, I'm guessing that's about all they told you.

00:03:46.520 Yes.

00:03:47.000 And, uh, what I, what I did get was I got eight pages of typewriter paperwork from 1982.

00:03:51.820 So I was born on March 31st, 1982.

00:03:54.300 At least that's the date they decided to go with.

00:03:56.620 Yeah.

00:03:56.760 There was even some speculation on that, you know, a few days, but I had, um, I say it's a gift

00:04:02.900 that I was receiving that I didn't know I was getting, uh, at the time it was just a

00:04:06.680 three ring binder with eight pages of typewriter paperwork.

00:04:09.320 Yeah.

00:04:09.840 And it had my birth mom's name, Glenda Sue Holt.

00:04:12.340 And then it had broken family history, uh, of her family that, that she had given human

00:04:18.180 services when she dropped me off at seven days old.

00:04:21.000 Okay.

00:04:21.720 So once the family officially adopted me, they, all those records came to them for me.

00:04:27.020 So I'm receiving that as well at eight years old.

00:04:30.380 So.

00:04:30.780 And do you remember your reaction or your emotional response when you were eight and you learned

00:04:35.140 that?

00:04:36.380 Yeah.

00:04:36.660 Yeah.

00:04:37.200 Um, that's the first time in my life I ever remember being broken.

00:04:43.340 Um, you know, to think about that's the first time in my life I ever remember asking God,

00:04:47.160 why, like, why do I have to be the wrong color?

00:04:50.200 That's what those kids said at school.

00:04:51.560 Right.

00:04:52.580 Um, why do I, why do I look different?

00:04:55.580 Um, you know, why did my mom not give birth to me?

00:05:00.000 And, but the biggest why question was why would my mother, my birth mom not want me, you know?

00:05:06.620 Um, that's a lot for an eight year old to think about.

00:05:09.760 Yeah.

00:05:10.280 And, uh, so honestly I was broken, you know, I cried a lot.

00:05:14.240 I, I was mad.

00:05:15.800 I was frustrated, but at the same time, you know, confused because I knew I was loved in

00:05:20.960 this family, you know, even though they're my adopted family, they love, they've loved

00:05:24.700 me so well, you know, it quickly, you know, the, the pain quickly turned into like, okay,

00:05:30.800 wait a minute.

00:05:31.220 They love me.

00:05:32.160 I'm in a safe place, you know?

00:05:34.180 And it comes back to, I tease when I speak, you know, nationally and publicly, I had a drug

00:05:40.180 problem growing up, you know, I was drugging and drug out of every church service known to

00:05:44.180 man.

00:05:44.520 I don't know who can relate to that out there, but every time the church doors are

00:05:48.200 open, I, you know, I was at church.

00:05:50.380 So my family, my mom's side of the family adopted side, uh, had a gospel quartet and

00:05:55.240 used to travel and sing.

00:05:57.020 And, uh, my grandmother, I call her Mimi.

00:05:59.780 She was my Sunday school teacher.

00:06:01.140 So I had literally had the word of, of God poured into my life and I knew of Jesus, but

00:06:08.120 in the middle of that little broken eight-year-old, uh, eight-year-old's heart, I actually came

00:06:13.240 to know Christ in the middle of that pain and that brokenness at a church service.

00:06:18.140 Wow.

00:06:18.740 Yeah.

00:06:19.020 Tell me a little bit more about that.

00:06:21.100 Uh, well, it was revival.

00:06:22.940 I don't know.

00:06:23.600 We, you know, we still have, we call them revivals in the South, but I grew up in the Tennessee,

00:06:28.840 Chattanooga area and, uh, we were having a revival, uh, a weekly revival.

00:06:33.500 And in the middle of that week, I just, again, sitting, sitting there with my family and hearing

00:06:38.820 the goodness of God.

00:06:39.860 And I've heard all my life.

00:06:41.800 I don't remember what the sermon was.

00:06:43.320 I don't remember really any of that other than I just needed Jesus.

00:06:47.440 And I'd heard my whole life that, you know, he's a comforter, he's a provider, he's a protector,

00:06:51.720 he's a savior.

00:06:52.720 And I needed, I needed somebody to take that pain, you know?

00:06:57.020 So I came running in the middle of the service.

00:06:59.400 I didn't wait for permission.

00:07:01.060 I just came running to Jesus.

00:07:03.220 Not even, we're barely five minutes in.

00:07:05.060 You're already making me cry.

00:07:06.320 Wow.

00:07:07.060 Yeah.

00:07:07.200 Wow.

00:07:08.160 So I, you know, I'm big on, I think pain has purpose.

00:07:13.020 Yeah.

00:07:13.460 If, if we can look hard enough, you know, that, um, that's the kind of God we serve, right?

00:07:18.600 Yeah.

00:07:18.820 Tell me, uh, when you learned the extent of, um, your kind of conception story and who

00:07:38.780 your biological mom was.

00:07:41.340 Right.

00:07:42.320 Well, I carried that why question for a long time, you know?

00:07:46.400 So like for middle school, high school, I, I tried to mask that in sports.

00:07:52.200 So I was earthquake in middle school, freight train in high school.

00:07:55.220 I was a fullback middle linebacker.

00:07:57.880 You know, I, I tried to, you know, to like, you know, that great, uh, quote that says,

00:08:03.700 you know, uh, Jesus plus nothing equals everything.

00:08:07.040 Yeah.

00:08:07.640 But I was trying to put something, you know, like sports or relationships.

00:08:12.640 Yeah.

00:08:12.900 Um, so I, uh, I actually get to college, uh, make it, make it, I made it to college and

00:08:19.100 I, uh, I played baseball in college, majored in youth ministry.

00:08:22.920 And, uh, I think my, my sole purpose in being in college was to find my wife.

00:08:27.360 She was a volleyball player from Tampa, Florida. 0.99

00:08:29.680 I married up.

00:08:30.480 She's five 11. 1.00

00:08:31.380 I'm five, none of your business.

00:08:33.440 But, uh, we, we start dating.

00:08:36.160 We start talking about what it would be like to have a family.

00:08:38.520 Like, do we want to have kids and how many do we want to have and how early do you want

00:08:42.200 to start?

00:08:42.880 So we get married in Tampa, Florida, her hometown in June of 2006.

00:08:49.000 And we start, you know, to have a family, we try to have a family early.

00:08:53.200 So I was a youth pastor at this little church.

00:08:55.440 My wife had gotten pregnant with our first and eight weeks into the pregnancy.

00:08:58.980 She wasn't feeling well.

00:09:00.380 I went to church on a Sunday and I came back to her, um, just in the fetal position in our

00:09:06.460 living room.

00:09:07.060 She had had miscarriage at home alone.

00:09:08.740 And, uh, here I find myself, my wife and I asking God the same question that little

00:09:13.480 eight year old boy was asking God, why this pain, we didn't sign up for this and we just

00:09:18.220 want to be parents, you know?

00:09:19.860 So we, we lose our, our eight week old, our first pregnancy.

00:09:23.860 Then we have, uh, Isabella, who's our 16 year old.

00:09:27.080 I have three daughters, by the way, uh, our oldest Isabella, she's 16. 0.66

00:09:30.460 And so we had her and then our third pregnancy, 10 weeks in, uh, my wife just wasn't feeling

00:09:36.540 well.

00:09:36.960 She knew that motherly instinct, something's not right.

00:09:39.540 So we went to the hospital or to the doctor and, uh, we had an ultrasound.

00:09:44.680 We see a baby, but no heartbeat.

00:09:47.020 So our third pregnancy, our 10 week old, we lost as well.

00:09:50.840 So now we've had two miscarriages.

00:09:52.300 Now I'm 41 years old, about to be 42.

00:09:56.560 Um, I still don't know medical history, but so at 27 at this time, or when we lost our

00:10:03.240 second baby or, or this, uh, miscarriage, um, I didn't know medical history.

00:10:11.220 And I, what the enemy started doing in me was it's your fault because if, if you knew your

00:10:18.760 past, right.

00:10:19.720 If you, uh, maybe there's generational curses or I was just thinking all these things,

00:10:24.700 right.

00:10:24.900 And if I just knew the medical history, I could save my babies.

00:10:28.300 So that's where my headspace was.

00:10:29.900 But I'm a middle school pastor, Wednesday nights, a hundred plus middle schoolers, you

00:10:33.920 know, and trying to, I talk to pastors all the time that it's okay to hurt.

00:10:38.520 Um, you know, I was young, you know, student pastor and I thought I had to have it all together.

00:10:42.900 So I didn't tell anybody.

00:10:43.980 So I'm depressed and I'm struggling.

00:10:45.720 And you felt like you couldn't be having a crisis of faith or you couldn't be questioning

00:10:51.480 these things or asking God these questions.

00:10:53.520 Cause then people wouldn't think that you're qualified to be a pastor.

00:10:56.900 So you bottled it up.

00:10:58.560 Absolutely.

00:10:59.200 And, uh, and that's where I was.

00:11:00.560 So in the middle of that, right.

00:11:02.820 I go back to that little eight year old boy, right in the middle of the pain, here comes

00:11:06.120 Jesus, you know, and I was sitting in a 975 square foot apartment in Tampa, Florida.

00:11:11.360 Uh, we'd had these two miscarriages.

00:11:13.500 We're actually pregnant with our four, the fourth pregnancy now, which is our 13 year

00:11:18.560 old daughter, Eliana today.

00:11:20.020 And then we had, I'll go ahead and say we have cadence, our 10 year old daughter.

00:11:24.020 But so this is 2009.

00:11:25.960 We've had those two miscarriages.

00:11:27.520 My wife's pregnant with Eliana, our second daughter.

00:11:30.960 And, uh, the Holy spirit just, just moved on my heart, uh, in a way that I've never had

00:11:36.600 happened since and what I heard was it's time and I'm like, Lord, it's time for what?

00:11:42.020 What's that mean?

00:11:42.600 I need more.

00:11:43.720 And I went into praying and fasting and he said, it's time to look for your mom.

00:11:48.380 So 27 years, right.

00:11:50.560 I mean, from eight years old to 27, you know how many times, like I thought about seeking

00:11:56.560 her out, you know, like where's she at?

00:11:59.220 Would she care?

00:12:00.120 Does she want me? 0.76

00:12:00.960 Would she like to know me?

00:12:02.540 And just the timing was never right.

00:12:04.560 Like I would get this close, you know, and I had, I had permission and, and, um, you

00:12:10.260 know, just support from my adopted family.

00:12:12.340 If I ever wanted to do that, which is a huge thing, you know, I wanted to honor them.

00:12:16.000 And so I called them and asked them, I said, is it okay to look?

00:12:19.440 And they gave me their blessing.

00:12:21.040 So I had that eight pages of typewriter paperwork from 1982 and I had Google.

00:12:26.520 So I started searching and three days into the search, uh, I was doing name searches.

00:12:31.840 I came across this man named Steve Holt, a website.

00:12:35.780 He's a magician and ventriloquist from Spartanburg, South Carolina. 0.80

00:12:39.520 And I know you don't know me out, but I don't like clowns.

00:12:42.920 I don't like Chucky.

00:12:44.500 It, I don't like any of that stuff.

00:12:46.000 So, I mean, this guy's like got videos of him, like sawing bodies in half and, you know,

00:12:50.780 head on this side.

00:12:51.960 Oh, heck no. 0.97

00:12:52.900 I'm like, not today, Satan.

00:12:54.260 You know, I'm not going on this man's website.

00:12:56.160 Yeah.

00:12:57.320 And really the puppets get me though.

00:12:59.220 Like those wood, you know, their eyeballs, they are, you know, I don't, so anyways, I

00:13:04.560 got past that because something said, click on his bio and I clicked on his bio and literally

00:13:10.620 I'm looking at my paperwork from 1982 and it all matches.

00:13:13.900 It all lines up in one specific name.

00:13:16.400 It says my baby sister on his online for him.

00:13:20.240 And it says Glenda Sue Holt.

00:13:22.180 And that's my birth mom's name.

00:13:23.480 So I'm like, okay, you know, it's gotta be family.

00:13:29.600 You know, this, this is my uncle.

00:13:31.760 So I sent him an email and it said, Hey, I think I'm your long lost nephew.

00:13:36.300 And that's why I gave him because, you know, he could be a serial killer or, you know, I

00:13:40.400 don't know.

00:13:40.620 Yeah.

00:13:40.940 You know, you didn't want to tell him.

00:13:42.440 No, I did not want to tell him anything, but he emails me back.

00:13:45.640 And then about two months later, I jump on a plane, fly to Spartanburg, South Carolina.

00:13:50.160 I get to meet my birth uncle.

00:13:51.680 What did he, what did he say?

00:13:53.880 And his response, do you remember?

00:13:56.500 Um, well, I know that his wife, my aunt Vicky said that he reads this email and literally

00:14:01.980 falls out of his chair, you know, and, and, but he, he writes me back and just says, you

00:14:06.840 know, I think, uh, I think this is legitimate.

00:14:09.780 You know, I think that you are my nephew.

00:14:11.820 Uh, I would love to meet you, you know, things like that.

00:14:14.460 It was actually a very good response, a positive.

00:14:17.820 So I felt, you know, uh, good about flying up and meeting him.

00:14:21.260 Um, so we spend two days, you know, I'm standing, I mean, we meet and I'm in his living room.

00:14:26.600 You talk about two grown men, just hugging and weeping.

00:14:30.120 And because what he told me was, is in their family dynamic, there were, uh, six children.

00:14:35.900 So he was one of six, their parents had died at an early age and his five, the five siblings

00:14:43.120 that he has, they were all mentally handicapped, uh, in different ways.

00:14:46.840 Like, um, so he has a brother, uh, that literally has been, it was institutionalized from 18 months

00:14:53.480 old, um, you know, to my mom being an 11, functioning as an 11 year old mentally. 0.99

00:15:02.180 So, and he was the only one out of the six that was considered normal.

00:15:06.860 Was he the oldest?

00:15:08.040 Um, I actually, I don't remember where he falls in the story.

00:15:11.720 I know my mom was the youngest, um, but he, but he basically, he cared for them because

00:15:18.540 mom and dad died.

00:15:20.000 They were all thrown into orphanages.

00:15:22.280 Um, and sadly, you know, I'm a big.

00:15:24.640 And this was what in the 60s, 70s?

00:15:28.400 Yeah.

00:15:29.060 Yeah.

00:15:29.380 Cause I was born in 82 and, and, uh, and she was actually 18.

00:15:33.380 Okay.

00:15:33.800 So 60s.

00:15:35.160 Yeah.

00:15:35.340 Yeah.

00:15:35.800 Late 60s, 70s.

00:15:37.520 So just, I'm a big advocate for foster care and adoption.

00:15:42.640 You know, uh, that's my story, but these children, because of nobody wanted them, you know, so

00:15:48.700 they were, they were in orphanages literally, you know, for most of their adolescent years

00:15:52.880 until they aged out of the system.

00:15:55.240 Um, my mom at 18, when she aged out, she became a ward of the state of Georgia.

00:16:00.620 So this near the Atlanta area.

00:16:02.500 Yeah.

00:16:02.880 Because she had special needs.

00:16:04.720 And so it's not like she could just go to college or get a job.

00:16:07.560 Exactly.

00:16:08.200 So no, no parents, you know, no family to care for, for her.

00:16:11.960 So the state took over and, uh, they placed her in a mental institution.

00:16:16.520 And, uh, one evening, um, it was, we don't believe it was workers.

00:16:21.140 She, they, they set her up with kind of a work program because she could function some, 0.84

00:16:25.900 you know, to work, like to safely walk a short distance, like potentially work, you know,

00:16:30.200 kind of like a little job that she could have some independence.

00:16:33.460 Uh, but one evening on her way home, she was actually raped by five men. 0.96

00:16:37.420 Wow. 0.90

00:16:38.080 So she was just attacked in a random attack.

00:16:40.320 She didn't, as far as you know, she didn't know these people.

00:16:42.520 No.

00:16:42.900 Um, so we don't know who we still, to this day, don't know who, who the men were.

00:16:47.820 Um, but so again, think about she's 18 physically, but mentally she's only a child.

00:16:53.440 Yeah.

00:16:54.220 So does she even know what happened to her?

00:16:57.240 You know, has anything ever, you know, has she been exposed to anything like that?

00:17:00.780 I don't, we didn't, we don't know.

00:17:02.540 And how did you, so I guess your uncle somehow learned of everything that happened.

00:17:08.800 That's how you know.

00:17:09.860 Well, they found out they, the, obviously she, she didn't tell anybody that it happened.

00:17:16.040 She probably couldn't really articulate that.

00:17:17.860 And so when they do find, they find out the staff, find out that she's pregnant because 0.99

00:17:22.860 she's showing, you know, uh, that's how long, you know, it took for people to find this

00:17:27.140 out.

00:17:27.640 So, I mean, the, you know, she tells the story.

00:17:30.440 So, I mean, it's her account, you know, of what happened to her.

00:17:33.520 Yeah.

00:17:33.980 Just as she was attacked by five men when she was walking home.

00:17:38.560 So, so this is a state ran facility.

00:17:42.340 Yeah.

00:17:42.720 Um, she has no resources, no job, no money. 1.00

00:17:46.100 Um, so what do you, what do you think that they're telling her to do?

00:17:49.920 You know, have an abortion. 0.99

00:17:51.160 I'm sure that they're trying to pressure her to do that.

00:17:53.420 They're not giving her options.

00:17:54.940 Right.

00:17:55.560 Yeah.

00:17:55.880 Uh, they're literally pressuring her every day to get rid of her baby. 1.00

00:17:59.660 And I mean, she's amazing.

00:18:04.460 You know, she said even with 11 year old mental capacity, 18 years old, she said, my baby's

00:18:09.400 worth fighting for.

00:18:10.420 Yeah.

00:18:10.740 So, so to fight for me and save my life, she actually ran away from the facility.

00:18:16.380 I don't, we don't know how she escaped.

00:18:18.600 Um, but, uh, the last time my uncle, uh, had, had, I guess, seen me, he didn't really see

00:18:25.760 me, but I was in the womb.

00:18:26.820 She actually came to him for help and, uh, he cared for, for she and I for about a week

00:18:32.580 until she disappeared for 10 years.

00:18:34.940 So he didn't know what happened from 1982 to 1992, he reconnected with her.

00:18:40.240 So he never knew what happened to the baby.

00:18:41.900 And here I am, 27 year old man standing in his living room.

00:18:45.520 So he did meet you when you were a baby.

00:18:48.500 So, I mean, in the, in the womb, in the womb.

00:18:50.620 Yeah.

00:18:50.780 Okay.

00:18:51.200 Yeah.

00:18:51.400 So not, you know, he didn't meet me, meet me, but I was in his presence.

00:18:54.740 Right.

00:18:55.600 Wow.

00:18:56.100 And so, I mean, I don't know how else to explain that beyond just the Holy Spirit convicted

00:19:02.260 her because that's what God can do.

00:19:03.980 He can communicate to and through anyone just convicted her to fight for you and to

00:19:09.600 fight for your life.

00:19:10.540 When really you would think with an 11 year old, you know, mental capacity that she would

00:19:16.180 have just complied with what the people told her to do, but she knew that I'm going to fight

00:19:21.900 for my baby.

00:19:22.480 And so she ran, she ran away.

00:19:24.120 Do you know like how she gave birth to you?

00:19:27.060 Did she run to a hospital?

00:19:28.620 Do you know how that worked?

00:19:29.840 Well, we know that she made it to a women's shelter in Chattanooga.

00:19:33.980 Tennessee, which from where things happened, it was about two hours.

00:19:37.820 Yeah.

00:19:38.000 So was she in Atlanta?

00:19:39.220 She was in the Atlanta area, like Rome, Georgia area.

00:19:44.440 So she made it to Chattanooga, was there for a little while.

00:19:48.400 They cared for her.

00:19:49.360 We just know from a paperwork trail.

00:19:51.560 But then by the end of the pregnancy, she's nine months pregnant and she's living on the 0.99

00:19:56.240 streets.

00:19:56.640 So she's actually in a cardboard box behind this little grocery store in this little small

00:20:02.040 town called Whitwell, Tennessee.

00:20:04.520 And it's if the people, if you're from there, they say, well, so it's a mining town like

00:20:09.380 Chattanooga is, you know, over here, there's a mountain, then Whitwell's in the valley.

00:20:13.600 So it's literally tucked in two mountains and she's living in this box behind the store

00:20:18.780 and a 16 year old boy named Bobby came around the skipping school, came around the back of

00:20:24.220 the store and sees the box move, pulls it back.

00:20:26.840 And here she is, 18 years old, nine months pregnant.

00:20:30.200 He takes her home to his family, like walks her home and walks in the door, you know,

00:20:35.500 16 years old, walks in the door with an 18 year old, nine month pregnant woman.

00:20:38.740 And it's like, hey, I found her in this box behind the store.

00:20:41.780 Can we keep her? 0.94

00:20:42.880 Right.

00:20:43.480 And that, you know, to me as a parent, you know, a parent, a 16 year old young man walks

00:20:47.880 in with an 18 year old, nine month pregnant woman.

00:20:49.840 It's like, I got some questions here.

00:20:51.220 Yeah.

00:20:51.780 Right.

00:20:52.080 But no, I just found her.

00:20:53.140 Can we keep her? 0.94

00:20:53.900 And they took us in, cared for us for like two weeks.

00:20:57.460 And then she gave birth to me in Chattanooga, Tennessee, at Erlinger Hospital, they said on

00:21:04.380 March 31st, 1982.

00:21:06.520 And so everybody always like, who, you know, how did you get the name Steven then?

00:21:11.620 Right.

00:21:12.500 Well, this mentally challenged 18 year old woman, 11 year old capacity said, I want my 0.99

00:21:16.880 son to be named Steven then William.

00:21:20.820 Oh.

00:21:21.880 So Steven was her brother, my uncle, who I'm standing in his living room.

00:21:25.720 Yeah.

00:21:26.180 And William was her dad, my grandfather.

00:21:28.900 So she wanted me to have both names.

00:21:30.900 So what we, what we think, you know, she probably didn't speak very well, articulate very well.

00:21:37.340 So they're asking her like, what, you know, you want to name him what?

00:21:40.680 Steven then William, Steven then William.

00:21:42.740 So whoever heard it put S-T-E-V-E-N-T-H-E-N.

00:21:47.400 Steven then is my first name.

00:21:48.960 Oh my goodness.

00:21:50.820 So as I think I'm the only one in the world that we know of right now.

00:21:54.860 So I'm finding all this out at 27 standing in his living room, but then.

00:22:12.200 That's a lot.

00:22:13.020 Yeah.

00:22:13.340 But it's not over yet.

00:22:14.440 Yeah.

00:22:14.680 I'm standing there and it kind of got awkward.

00:22:17.160 It got quiet.

00:22:17.820 He, um, I thought I said something wrong, you know, and he, he just says, you know,

00:22:23.000 I had to meet you and look you in the eyes and see what kind of man you were before I

00:22:27.120 told you this, but your mom is alive.

00:22:29.520 She's five hours South of where we stand.

00:22:32.260 Yeah.

00:22:32.700 And he asked me one question.

00:22:33.900 He said, do you want to meet her?

00:22:35.180 Yeah.

00:22:35.580 And what the Holy Spirit had spoke to me a couple months before I got to fly up there

00:22:40.400 was it's time.

00:22:41.700 So we jump in a car the next day.

00:22:43.540 I wanted to go that night, you know, let's, let's go.

00:22:46.060 So, um, but we drove five hours South to a little town called Jeffersonville, Georgia,

00:22:50.860 where my mom was staying in another mental institution, like a nursing home.

00:22:54.320 Okay.

00:22:55.020 Had men on one side, women on the other. 0.97

00:22:56.900 And my uncle was like, Hey, let's do a magic show.

00:23:00.100 I'm going to do a show for the residents because that way, because again, I mean, I'm 27, she's

00:23:04.940 46, but she's still only 11 mentally.

00:23:08.180 So you're about to meet, you know, we're about to drop a bomb in her life, you know, 27 year

00:23:13.420 old.

00:23:13.680 Hey, here I am.

00:23:14.600 Um, and that's like such a tough dynamic for you to be in some way older than your

00:23:19.440 mother.

00:23:19.840 Yeah.

00:23:20.380 You know?

00:23:21.160 Yeah.

00:23:21.920 Yeah.

00:23:23.020 Um, so I, I got to spend two hours just interacting with her.

00:23:27.460 Like she didn't know who I was, but I knew who she was.

00:23:29.740 What was it like when you saw her for the first time?

00:23:31.540 It was like trying to hold back a flood, you know, 27 years of tears.

00:23:35.500 Well, eight, you know, whatever the math is, um, you know, just trying to hold back just

00:23:41.440 thankfulness, um, because I, all I needed, I mean, my God's faithful.

00:23:46.060 He's good.

00:23:46.700 I know my identity and my worth is, I didn't have to meet her, you know, but for me to have

00:23:52.340 the opportunity to meet her, I just wanted to tell her I loved her and thank you for giving

00:23:56.780 me life.

00:23:57.200 And if I, if that's all I got, I was okay with that.

00:24:00.280 Yeah.

00:24:01.340 So, you know, it was, I was dying to just tell her, you know, but we were trying to ease

00:24:06.000 it in.

00:24:06.440 Like I'm your, I'm your brother's friend, Steven, you know, we didn't, we didn't, um,

00:24:11.500 you know, give the full name cause she named me that we didn't want to give it away. 0.80

00:24:14.100 So anyways, he does this magic show and I mean, you know, these people are like schizophrenics

00:24:18.940 and, you know, bipolar and he's saw it putting ropes through people's bodies.

00:24:24.040 And it was really, I'm just, I've got to set the scene because, you know, it was very

00:24:28.500 comical.

00:24:31.540 It's not the scene that maybe like, uh, Hollywood would have painted for this like grand reunion.

00:24:38.960 There's like this crazy magic show and these residents who have got a lot going on themselves.

00:24:45.280 And in the midst of all of that, you're seeing your mother for the first time.

00:24:48.620 And so we were going to go to her room and do this private encounter, um, because we didn't

00:24:53.640 know how she would take it, but she'd been singing songs all day and I'm a singer, worship

00:24:58.940 leader, um, singer songwriter.

00:25:01.600 And, um, they, he gets through the magic show.

00:25:05.040 I'm working a camera, like we hadn't planned to film it, but we were just kind of filming

00:25:09.320 his magic show just to kind of capture the moments.

00:25:11.860 And she gets through singing and I just felt led to come sing amazing grace.

00:25:16.280 And I come up and the camera's still rolling and my uncle standing in between us and I start

00:25:21.260 singing amazing grace, how sweet the sound that saved.

00:25:24.200 And when I hit that word saved, it was like, not just a salvation, you know, moment, but

00:25:30.340 a, this woman I'm looking at in the eyes saved my life and I lost it.

00:25:35.220 And she hasn't sang on pitch or key all day long.

00:25:38.680 And she looks at me and she just finishes the whole verse like perfectly.

00:25:42.660 And, uh, just, and, and this is a, you know, this is on YouTube.

00:25:46.400 We have a video that people can, uh, we decided to make it public, uh, a few years ago just

00:25:51.660 for, you know, it's just too good for God's faithfulness, his goodness, you know, not to

00:25:56.200 hold on to.

00:25:57.820 So I'm getting to meet, uh, you know, he, he, in that moment after we did that, he was

00:26:02.440 like, we weren't going to do it this way, but basically here's your son, you know, and

00:26:07.600 she just embraced me and said that she loved me and she would have never given me up if

00:26:11.960 she could have kept me.

00:26:12.880 And those are all those questions I had.

00:26:15.120 I didn't, I didn't have to have them, but God gave me a lot of closure that I didn't

00:26:19.780 even know I needed.

00:26:20.840 Yeah.

00:26:21.240 You know?

00:26:21.620 So she had the ability to have a conversation with you about it.

00:26:24.820 She did.

00:26:26.060 And, um, you know, I am worth it and she did love me, you know?

00:26:31.700 And again, I knew that, but that was closure.

00:26:35.200 I didn't even realize that I needed it.

00:26:36.540 When she said that it was healing for me.

00:26:39.360 Um, and then I'd also made her a photo album that was really special to me.

00:26:43.800 It was the first picture they ever had of me and to, you know, and I filled it up with

00:26:47.440 pictures over the years because she held onto a picture for like 18 years.

00:26:51.600 That wasn't her, wasn't me that she thought was her baby.

00:26:54.860 So I was able to bless her with this photo album.

00:26:58.120 And, um, so we had 11 years with mama Glenda.

00:27:02.720 Uh, my girls call her Gigi, grandma Glenda. 0.62

00:27:05.660 So you talk about like the age difference.

00:27:07.840 My girls would bring coloring books and, um, baby dolls and play with my mom. 0.76

00:27:14.720 Yeah.

00:27:15.300 You know, they were like sisters when they get together, you know, like coloring or playing.

00:27:18.920 Um, but even though that was beautiful, it was also painful because, uh, she's a word

00:27:26.100 of the state.

00:27:26.640 They would move her from, you know, whatever the cheapest place was kind of under, you 1.00

00:27:31.240 know, sadly they're understaffed, over medicated.

00:27:33.540 And, um, but she, even with all that, and even though it was hard on my girls, we took

00:27:38.540 them at least once a year, sometimes twice.

00:27:40.800 It was hard on them to be in those places, but my mom deserved respect.

00:27:45.320 She deserved to be loved on.

00:27:47.600 And, um.

00:27:47.900 So that was what?

00:27:48.880 2009, 2010?

00:27:50.340 It was 2009 when we met.

00:27:52.860 Okay.

00:27:53.160 Um, so then she, uh, she actually passed away on Thanksgiving of 2020.

00:27:59.280 She choked on a sandwich, uh, in the facility that she was in.

00:28:03.080 What?

00:28:03.720 So, yeah, she was in a wheelchair and, you know, they, it's something that obviously they,

00:28:08.920 you know, uh, it was very, just a tragic, tragic accident.

00:28:12.900 But, um, you know, here I am asking God why again, right?

00:28:17.140 Um, but, um, you know, this beauty that comes out of pain.

00:28:22.480 And by that time I had been sharing our story quite a bit and probably 200,000 people or

00:28:28.720 so I've shared, you know, just doing a lot of pregnancy center fundraisers and, and, uh,

00:28:33.360 right to life events, pro-life events.

00:28:35.860 And when it hit social media, you know, shared about her, her death, I started getting floods

00:28:41.940 of messages.

00:28:42.480 Hey, she's not just your hero.

00:28:43.880 Cause I, she, I call her my hero.

00:28:45.600 She's mine too.

00:28:46.920 And, um, so I have this beautiful, um, mandate calling.

00:28:52.480 To carry on her legacy.

00:28:54.560 Cause she is a hero, right?

00:28:56.400 She fought for me and, uh, I'm thankful for that.

00:28:59.520 And, and what do you think when you hear these conversations and debates that go on in the

00:29:17.720 political realm, on social media, uh, when you hear, well, the compact, like you're basically

00:29:23.840 what they say is the, uh, exception.

00:29:26.780 Even if someone is pro-life, they'll say, well, but if they heard of the case of your mom,

00:29:31.780 they would say the empathetic thing to do, the compassionate thing to do would be absolutely

00:29:35.820 to make sure that she gets an abortion. 1.00

00:29:37.600 They would say, sure, maybe I'm pro-life, but rape, incest, if the mother, you know, has 1.00

00:29:45.220 special needs, then we should kill that child. 1.00

00:29:48.800 That's kind of the narrative that you hear sometimes on the left and the right. 1.00

00:29:52.580 I imagine just being who you are and having your testimony.

00:29:56.240 It's hard to hear those conversations in that tone.

00:30:00.400 Yeah.

00:30:01.780 It's hard to not take it personal.

00:30:03.860 Yeah.

00:30:04.260 You know, we, I can sit here and say, well, you know, I don't take it.

00:30:06.800 Well, it, it, it kind of is, you know, um, I'm a, um, I'm a lover of people.

00:30:13.500 I'm, I'm, if that makes sense, uh, what I'm trying to say there, I, I try, um, I'm going

00:30:19.400 to respect your position and where you stand, but that still doesn't mean that I can't have

00:30:23.500 a voice.

00:30:24.680 Um, and I, I think that for me, uh, the way I fight that is I share my story, right?

00:30:30.220 Like I, I'm here.

00:30:31.680 Um, I believe I have purpose.

00:30:33.140 I have worth that wasn't dictated by how I was conceived.

00:30:38.060 Right.

00:30:38.580 And, and the, uh, and I think we say, you know, in the exception world, it's, it's, you know,

00:30:43.600 the sins of the father shouldn't be passed on to the, onto the child, you know?

00:30:48.140 Um, and, and I, I used to, I used to say, um, man, I wish to be a child.

00:30:53.540 That would have never happened to my mom.

00:30:55.080 You know, like if I could trade places with her, I mean, you know, I don't, I don't want

00:30:58.620 her to have to go through that.

00:30:59.760 I mean, that was horrible and terrible, but then there's this other side I had to think

00:31:03.920 about, like, but God had this, you know, God worked in the middle of all that pain and

00:31:08.920 all that brokenness to bring me.

00:31:12.000 And I have three beautiful daughters, you know, that are 16, 13, and 10.

00:31:15.920 They love Jesus and they lead worship and they write songs.

00:31:19.480 Um, yeah, what Satan means for evil, God uses for good.

00:31:27.280 And I just, I love that verse so much.

00:31:29.220 I mean, when you think about the story that that verse is in that Joseph think about, it's

00:31:35.220 hard to think about things more tragic than one, what your mom went through, but also the

00:31:39.940 story of Joseph.

00:31:40.760 I mean, imagine being sold into slavery by your own brothers.

00:31:46.120 You're the youngest of the family and your brothers take you, they throw you into a pit.

00:31:50.860 So you get sold into slavery.

00:31:52.720 Like what is more evil and more wicked than that?

00:31:57.160 He's sold into slavery.

00:31:58.640 And then God uses that evil, that wickedness to save his own people from famine.

00:32:05.200 Wow.

00:32:06.140 And I just think of, I think of that when I think of your story, that what was so evil, 0.97

00:32:11.340 a woman being raped, a special needs woman being raped, that God used that evil to then 0.90

00:32:19.080 multiply his kingdom so that you can sit here, share your testimony, testify to the power 0.84

00:32:24.860 and the love and the grace and the redemption of the Lord and your daughters get to do the

00:32:28.680 same thing.

00:32:29.480 Wow.

00:32:29.720 God is so good.

00:32:30.520 Well, and I, and I look at, I mean, there's been moments where I've been able to share

00:32:34.280 at a fundraising event and I had a table, a small group of women at their church that

00:32:38.980 was struggling with that, you know, the exception, you know, rape and incest.

00:32:42.920 And like, they kind of came with, Hey, we're here.

00:32:46.460 We lean towards the other, you know, the other side of an agreement with rape and, you know,

00:32:51.980 making the exception.

00:32:52.780 And then after, you know, I got to share my story where we're, you know, they're surrounding

00:32:56.960 me, we're all crying.

00:32:58.180 And it's like, you, you've changed our hearts, you know, you changed our minds.

00:33:02.420 Like we, we can't sit here.

00:33:03.860 You don't hear your story and not be moved.

00:33:05.700 And we have to rethink the position.

00:33:08.000 And I, God's given me, that's just one, but so many conversations.

00:33:14.140 Um, and for me, uh, it's just being faithful to share the story, um, and let God handle the

00:33:21.160 rest.

00:33:21.420 But I had a 12 year old Hispanic young girl that had actually been raped by her uncle

00:33:26.940 and had actually heard me share my story at a, I was, I was there to lead worship at

00:33:31.460 a camp and I wasn't even supposed to share my story, but God opened the door for me to

00:33:36.020 share.

00:33:36.600 And she actually went against the wishes of her parents to choose life.

00:33:41.260 So she got removed from the home.

00:33:43.960 She gave birth to her baby.

00:33:45.440 I was leading worship at a church and this family came in place, that baby in my arms.

00:33:50.440 Wow.

00:33:51.580 Talk about losing it.

00:33:52.980 Yeah.

00:33:53.600 And then this young woman got adopted by another family, another church family, the little girl.

00:33:58.440 So I got to meet her at 13 and she's crying and she says, how do I know that my son going

00:34:04.020 to know that I love him because I gave him away.

00:34:06.440 And I'm, I'm trying to get the words out.

00:34:08.460 I'm crying.

00:34:08.800 I said, you're one of the strongest women on the planet, you know, to give birth to your 1.00

00:34:14.020 child.

00:34:15.400 Give your child a loving home, right?

00:34:17.780 You loved him so much that you, you wanted to place him in a place that he could be loved

00:34:21.660 well and provided for, you know, he knows.

00:34:24.680 And one day I hope maybe that he'll have the chance like I did, you know, to look my mom

00:34:29.820 in the eyes, hug her and tell her, I love her.

00:34:31.760 Thank you for giving me life.

00:34:33.540 I just, again, those are just those little moments where I call, you know, nuggets, God

00:34:39.260 winks.

00:34:39.780 It's like, Hey, you know, this is part of your purpose.

00:34:43.240 I truly believe that's part of my purpose is to continue to share my story.

00:34:48.620 And I know that this is, it's painful, but because all of us have this, I think just

00:34:54.920 natural drive to know whose we are, where we come from, even just physically, obviously

00:34:59.940 we know that we're gods.

00:35:01.080 But have you ever wondered like who your, who your father is and what happened to those

00:35:08.160 men who assaulted your mom?

00:35:10.180 Yeah.

00:35:11.220 I've, um, I've had moments where I've thought, thought about that.

00:35:15.800 Um, even recently I've had people ask me, you know, do you not want justice for your

00:35:19.940 mom?

00:35:20.280 They've come out and asked that.

00:35:21.780 And it's not that I don't want justice for my mom, but I don't, I go by the direction

00:35:26.940 of the Lord, you know, and I haven't felt in my heart that he's, you know, called me to

00:35:31.560 seek that out to try to find.

00:35:32.960 Um, I'm not saying that it won't happen one day, but right now I feel like he's redeemed

00:35:39.040 and restored all the evil by what, you know, with my mom's life and what I'm able to do

00:35:45.440 and carry on her legacy by sharing our story.

00:35:48.480 Um, I've even had somebody, I mean, we're, we're being honest here.

00:35:52.520 I've had somebody ask me like, you know, what if he's not a believer, you know, this person

00:35:58.120 and if you could find them, right.

00:36:00.100 So I'm wrestling with that.

00:36:01.300 I'm wrestling with that right now, you know, on, um, cause I hadn't thought, I hadn't thought

00:36:06.500 about it in that way before, you know, I, I'd put my focus more on my mom and our story

00:36:12.580 and, and, uh, and honoring her.

00:36:15.000 Um, I don't hate my, I don't hate my dad, uh, my father, my birth father.

00:36:21.040 I don't hate those men.

00:36:23.160 Um, I had to let go of that a long time ago.

00:36:25.660 You know, I think that those bitterness and, you know, hold root and, and, um, can keep

00:36:30.980 us, you know, um, held in chains, I guess is the best way.

00:36:34.600 I don't want that.

00:36:35.280 I don't think that's what God wants.

00:36:37.360 Um, but, but two, I think one of the biggest reasons that I've never really, I've thought

00:36:43.140 about it, but it hasn't been a deep longing pursuit to find my father's because I had one

00:36:47.600 of the best fathers, uh, earthly fathers that I could have had.

00:36:50.560 Um, my dad, I've got a picture in my book on page 36 that I, that's a treasure to me.

00:36:56.880 He was a coal miner.

00:36:57.920 I thought he was black most of my life, but he was not, he was white because he would come 1.00

00:37:01.800 in covered in coal and he would clean himself and he would sleep shirtless.

00:37:05.980 And from the first day they brought me home, he would hold me on his chest and sleep with

00:37:10.420 me, uh, heart to heart.

00:37:12.000 And I have that.

00:37:12.920 It's a treasure because, uh, he, he died of Alzheimer's.

00:37:16.340 He passed away on August 19th of 2014 and I got to hold him on his way out.

00:37:22.700 Like he held me on my way in and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

00:37:26.660 So, uh, I mean, he was a hard nose country man.

00:37:31.660 You know, when they tried to remove me, actually at six months old, the state of Tennessee tried

00:37:36.120 to remove me from the home because of my, my skin color.

00:37:39.040 Um, so being a biracial child in the South, they felt like I would be better placed in a

00:37:44.440 biracial home, mixed race home or an African American home.

00:37:48.180 And my dad put a shotgun by the back door or the front door and said, you can come in,

00:37:52.460 but you're not taking my son.

00:37:53.780 I'm not saying that's the best way to handle it legally.

00:37:55.940 That's just what happened.

00:37:56.900 But.

00:37:57.660 Tennessee coal miner.

00:37:58.520 He's my dad.

00:37:59.080 Yeah.

00:37:59.880 And, uh, he loved me and fought for me.

00:38:02.240 And, and did you have adopted siblings?

00:38:04.240 Like.

00:38:04.620 I did.

00:38:04.980 I did.

00:38:05.220 I'm adopted, but adoptive siblings, I guess.

00:38:08.220 So what's, it's beautiful.

00:38:09.780 I've been an uncle since I was two.

00:38:11.540 Wow.

00:38:11.900 So I have four, uh, I have four siblings adopted, my adopted siblings.

00:38:17.000 I have, which is, this is hilarious to me.

00:38:19.240 I have Ricky, Rod, Renee and Robin, and then there's Steven then.

00:38:24.060 Yeah.

00:38:24.340 And you would have thought, you know, eight years of like, why is my name different?

00:38:28.640 Like, I just never, they just love me, you know?

00:38:31.820 Um, and I've always been a part of the family and, um, I teared up.

00:38:35.920 Yes.

00:38:36.180 Actually flying here, uh, to do the show, like talking to my mom and my sister on a call,

00:38:41.120 just thanking them for just loving me, you know, and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't

00:38:45.800 for them, you know?

00:38:47.320 Uh, so yeah, Ricky, Rod, Renee and Robin.

00:38:49.280 And I, it's a 13 year age gap.

00:38:53.040 Yeah.

00:38:53.780 Well, there's so much in your story that flies against, uh, flies in the face of common narratives

00:38:59.200 of today that, uh, you know, a Southern Tennessee white coal mining family took in a little biracial

00:39:09.200 boy and you having to deal with everything that came with being biracial in the South

00:39:16.080 and this time and being bullied because of that.

00:39:19.260 Gosh, there's just a lot of complexity and a lot of layers to your story.

00:39:22.980 Well, I think a really beautiful thing too, for me is I still to this day.

00:39:26.820 So when the state tried to remove me from the home, um, not only did my family fight

00:39:31.260 for me, but I have, uh, a folder, a Manila, uh, envelope that has about 200 and over 250

00:39:39.280 petition letters that this community, um, which racism still existed, you know, and is 82, um,

00:39:47.040 was prevalent there.

00:39:48.600 And they still rallied behind this family to keep this biracial child in the home. 0.99

00:39:54.000 Like if it wouldn't have been for them, you know, their voice and them writing letters

00:39:57.180 into the state.

00:39:57.880 And it even went over beyond state lines, actually some of the letters, but, uh, that

00:40:02.740 just, I think that's, again, like when I get an opportunity to share it, fundraising events

00:40:06.880 and things like that, I share that because this community decided, you know, Sarah and Burke

00:40:11.820 says the only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.

00:40:15.400 Yeah.

00:40:16.100 And, um, so let's do something, right?

00:40:18.000 Yeah.

00:40:18.300 And the love of Christ transcends, transcends skin color, transcends norms.

00:40:24.000 And it also just goes to show that history in the world isn't as figuratively and literally

00:40:30.800 black and white as we kind of make it out to be that, okay, everyone in the South that

00:40:36.380 was white was racist or whatever it is in either direction.

00:40:41.280 And like human beings, history, the history of a country, the history of us as people,

00:40:48.020 the history of the church, it's complicated.

00:40:50.100 There are a lot of layers and the through line is God's faithfulness.

00:40:53.580 And I think that your story is such a great example of that.

00:40:57.160 Is there any just kind of like final message that you would speak to someone who is either

00:41:15.140 in your situation or who has an unexpected pregnancy or just wants to know the gospel?

00:41:20.900 What would you say?

00:41:21.520 Well, I think, you know, for us, um, universal message is that you're not alone, right?

00:41:29.700 Um, you know, whether you're someone who's struggling to know your purpose and, you know,

00:41:34.000 whether there's a God or does he love me?

00:41:35.860 Does he care about me?

00:41:37.100 You're, you're never alone.

00:41:38.200 I love, uh, second Corinthians four, eight and nine.

00:41:40.980 It talks about how, you know, we're hard pressed, we're crushed and all those things.

00:41:44.260 But my favorite one is, you know, you're, you're never abandoned.

00:41:47.580 You're never alone.

00:41:48.400 You may, you know, you're, uh, in struck down, but not destroyed.

00:41:51.600 Not yet.

00:41:52.520 Um, I'll say broken, not dead.

00:41:54.420 That's a, that's how I live.

00:41:55.640 But I think, um, that you're never, you're not alone.

00:41:58.960 So if you're, if you're someone who's, um, you know, an unexpected pregnancy and looking

00:42:03.400 for help, there's beautiful organizations that I've been blessed.

00:42:06.280 I've been in 39 States now, you know, and I know that, um, you know, every single one of

00:42:10.960 those places I've been in is nonjudgmental.

00:42:13.380 You know, they love you, support you.

00:42:15.760 They have resources, you know?

00:42:17.460 So just to know that there is help and there is support, um, to look for your local pregnancy

00:42:22.660 resource center, I think would be a great place, but also to the church, you know, like

00:42:26.120 for the gospel, like when my mom died, I was struggling with why did she have to die alone?

00:42:32.100 Um, and God quickly reminded me, you know, after a week or so of, uh, grieving and crying and

00:42:39.000 asking God why, uh, she was never alone.

00:42:42.840 You know?

00:42:43.420 So we, I think that's, I think for me, that's, I think a lot of people, if we can just realize

00:42:48.660 that God does have a plan for your life, he's created you for a purpose, you know, on purpose

00:42:53.300 with purpose and, uh, and he's there, you know, and he truly loves you.

00:42:57.880 And there's people like me that, uh, you know, if I can help in any way, I mean, there's a

00:43:02.740 lot of us out there in, in the faith-based world.

00:43:05.880 And where can people find you if they want to connect with you?

00:43:08.920 The beautiful thing is, I'll bet I'm the only Stevenson in the world.

00:43:12.000 So, uh, I don't have to worry about SEO or too much, uh, but steventon.com.

00:43:18.500 Uh, so Steve, Stevenson Holland is my last name.

00:43:21.300 So if you Google me, um, you know, videos and, and I'm, again, I'm a singer songwriter.

00:43:26.160 So I've got about 22 songs I've recorded.

00:43:28.120 I'm recording in Nashville in February.

00:43:29.960 Good.

00:43:30.560 Um, and then, uh, my nonprofit broken, not dead ministries.

00:43:35.040 Yeah.

00:43:35.400 So broken, not dead.com is also a good place to track me down.

00:43:39.320 Well, Stevenson, thank you so much for taking the time to share.

00:43:42.000 Testimony and may God bless you and your sweet girls and your family.

00:43:45.600 Thank you.

00:43:45.980 Thank you.

Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - January 29, 2024

Ep 941 ｜ Conceived in Rape, Chosen by God ｜ Guest： Steventhen Holland

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