SHNEAKO - NEVER LIVE WITH REGRET.

00:00:00.000 cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with

00:00:06.800 noodles wild geese that fly with a moon on their wings these are a few of my favorite things

00:00:14.240 i absolutely despise this tattoo it was the last one i got when i was 21 years old it's really not

00:00:22.000 that bad of a tattoo and it has a cool story i could tell people these are a few of my favorite

00:00:27.980 I had to get surgery on my broken elbow and ruptured tricep tendon and it created this

00:00:50.380 nasty scar that I will live with for life.

00:00:52.860 So the tail of this Japanese dragon connects from the bottom of this scar.

00:00:57.120 I hate this tattoo because I was on Percocet when I got it because it took eight hours long.

00:01:01.860 Every time I look at it, I'm reminded of how I cheated to get it done.

00:01:05.300 I used to joke around and tell girls that I got in a motorcycle accident,

00:01:08.980 but the truth is I was wasted on Halloween night freshman year of college

00:01:12.300 and jumped over a fence, landing right here.

00:01:15.700 Definitely not my proudest moment in life,

00:01:18.360 but it is a reminder to never live with regret.

00:01:21.220 There's just no reason that exists to justify living with regret.

00:01:24.560 Not only does regret solve nothing, but I'm fearful of it because it's the state of living

00:01:29.380 in the past.

00:01:43.060 Without being dramatic, this broken elbow was one of the most devastating blows of my

00:01:51.320 life. Because at the time, I was taking the gym more seriously than I ever had in my life. I weighed

00:01:55.920 185 pounds and was deadlifting 415. I was going out with my friends four nights a week and doing

00:02:01.900 better with women than I ever have in life. But after my elbow hit the grass like a WWE wrestler,

00:02:07.140 I was out of commission for months. I lost 20 pounds immediately and I didn't have health

00:02:11.720 insurance. So for four weeks, I went to class with an arm that couldn't bend stuck inside my hoodie

00:02:16.760 pocket like a do-it-yourself sling praying that it was just a sprain later on the pain got so bad

00:02:22.940 my right hand literally couldn't use a pencil i'm very lucky i live in the age

00:02:26.980 yeah i should have went to the doctor but it was the breaking bad situation where i didn't want to

00:02:32.760 pay for hospital bills without insurance on top of my student loans being unable to go to the gym

00:02:37.280 and lift for that long had me lose so much weight i remember my film professor made a comment about

00:02:41.680 how skinny i was in front of the whole auditorium i was so upset after class i went up to him and

00:02:46.680 said, don't talk about my weight. But I hit the lottery when a month later while playing for the

00:02:50.700 school soccer team, somebody slide tackled me and guess where I landed? I was rushed to the hospital

00:02:56.400 and they did an MRI scan finding a ruptured tricep tendon and a broken elbow that happened

00:03:01.720 during the school soccer game. Take a wild guess who was now liable for the $30,000 of hospital

00:03:06.940 bills, surgery, and physical therapy. That story helps cement the idea that everything does happen

00:03:12.320 for a reason. A six-year-old boy needs to first put his fingertip on the hot stove before he never

00:03:17.320 does it again. Now, I never get so drunk that I jump over a fence and have to pay $30,000 in

00:03:22.580 hospital bills. But also, in every crisis, there's opportunity. I don't just look at his arm and see

00:03:27.080 stupidity. It's a reminder that in a way, I was able to get back the $30,000 the school system

00:03:32.700 stole from me.

00:03:33.700 I make a date for golf, and you can bet your life it rains.

00:03:40.480 I try to give a party in my life.

00:03:43.980 Funny thing about Picasso is you think sometimes that he was alive thousands of years ago,

00:03:48.260 but 50 years ago, Papa Picasso was still alive.

00:03:51.460 i think the ultimate challenge for my 20s is going to be shifting away from social media and

00:04:08.240 all the politics that i've got myself involved in to be able to make what i really want to make

00:04:13.420 i think we've yet to see an artist come directly out of the social media world and i want to be

00:04:18.900 the one to do it. When I was streaming the other night, my community started saying that art is

00:04:23.080 liberal and gay. In streaming, I've cultivated an audience that shares little to no interest with

00:04:28.880 me besides UFC and all the dude activities that are popular in media. Most of the people that

00:04:34.360 watch my streams only like movies like The Joker, Fight Club, The Matrix. I spend so much time in

00:04:40.740 galleries and museums because nothing else instantly gives me so much inspiration. As I

00:04:45.860 get older I come to realize that there's really nothing more uninteresting than talking about

00:04:49.820 than money business. Many men are afraid to discuss anything else or step foot in a place like this

00:04:56.480 because art is supposed to expose and highlight our vulnerabilities. I love streaming but part

00:05:02.900 of the reason I hate it is because you end up becoming a jukebox for people who want to hear

00:05:08.500 the same talking points over and over again. Especially when your audience is 98% male,

00:05:13.960 they want to hear discussions about women and self-improvement so that listening to you feels

00:05:18.680 like they're progressing but most of them never apply any of it they just like hearing the greatest

00:05:23.320 hits sometimes streaming now feels like being a seven-year-old rock star who's playing hits from

00:05:28.600 the 80s i'm beginning to understand why bands like radiohead refused to play their most famous songs

00:05:34.360 like creep i'm a widow yeah maybe in 1993 but it's time to grow up

00:05:50.280 Actress hunting today.

00:06:04.740 The first one was really good, but you need to weigh your options.

00:06:08.000 I feel like Agent Harvey Weinstein without the allegations.

00:06:20.280 Just spoke with a PR lady here and good meeting, very intense lady.

00:06:28.520 She said exactly what I knew, to get uncancelled, all the people in entertainment who have dodgy

00:06:33.280 whatever allegations, the only way to be reintroduced to society is to make something so dope that

00:06:38.840 they forget.

00:06:39.840 Back to work, I guess.

00:06:40.840 I unironically also think that the suit is going to help me get uncancelled.

SHNEAKO - December 22, 2025

NEVER LIVE WITH REGRET.

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