SHNEAKO - What's Your Biggest Change of Mind？

00:00:00.000 What was your biggest change of mind in life?

00:00:03.180 Mmm, biggest change of mind.

00:00:04.960 Biggest change of mind.

00:00:06.420 My biggest change of mind?

00:00:09.920 What do you mean?

00:00:11.020 God.

00:00:12.140 Um.

00:00:13.360 Hmm.

00:00:13.880 Uh.

00:00:14.600 Huh. 1.00

00:00:16.160 Fucking. 1.00

00:00:16.940 I used to be Republican and I used to be straight. 1.00

00:00:19.640 Now I am very gay and very not Republican.

00:00:25.000 I mean, I love New Zealand, but I realize that there's a lot more to life than just a small country.

00:00:30.360 Was the idea that New York City was a place where you're going to make it in New York City?

00:00:35.580 I believe New York City makes you.

00:00:37.520 Murders and executions definitely changed me.

00:00:40.920 Well, since you're asking, I think that you'll have to decide to be happy.

00:00:45.000 Maybe just that the only way I can be happy is to be sober.

00:00:47.860 Maybe at about 40, I finally decided, yeah, I can do this.

00:00:51.860 I only had fake confidence until I was 40.

00:00:54.460 I think I was really insecure in, like, high school, but now that I'm a little older, I was just like, yo, being shy is going to get me absolutely nothing.

00:01:04.560 So I just decided to, like, I don't know.

00:01:09.000 What's your name?

00:01:10.000 My name's Amanda. Nice to meet you.

00:01:11.480 Nice to meet you, Amanda. So you just said that I'm smart and I need to do better. Why'd you say that?

00:01:15.900 I think that you're like a very artistic and like very creative person and I think that you've kind of fallen for the trap of like the grift which I get a little bit because I would too if it was like you're making so much money like it's alluring but I think that I think you should be more true to yourself and don't let people like yelling at you like I just don't want you to be as inflammatory as you are sometimes because I think you are a person of value and you have a lot of good shit to say. 0.92

00:01:43.140 And I think you should direct that into better stuff, though, and not fall for the grift as much.

00:01:48.040 What do you think I grifted?

00:01:50.140 Just some of your takes about, like, women and, like, kind of, like, the Andrew Tate-y type stuff. 0.98

00:01:54.760 Like, that manosphere kind of garbage I don't really love. 0.95

00:01:57.860 Is there, like, a point? What do you think is a belief that I should, yeah, that I should stop grifting? 0.97

00:02:05.300 Just with, like, some, like, I can't think of, like, an exact, like, quote of yours, but I will say, like, just...

00:02:11.540 It doesn't have to be a quote. I don't expect you to have that on deck, but like a belief or something that's incorrect.

00:02:17.180 Just like, I would think just like some of the grifting stuff with just like the way you speak about women sometimes. 1.00

00:02:24.140 I think you should like maybe reframe some of that.

00:02:27.820 That's understandable. I think the pendulum swings one way and the other way.

00:02:30.900 I think feminism went really far this way. 1.00

00:02:33.860 And in New York, there was a time where like women were saying men are trash, kill all men. 0.99

00:02:37.640 And a lot of that was, and I think it did correct. 0.98

00:02:39.760 So although maybe it did go far, I think it did autocorrect and we're back somewhere a little more sensible now.

00:02:45.600 Okay.

00:02:46.220 Well, then I'd love to see you follow that autocorrection.

00:02:48.860 And I'd love to see you get back to some of your old content.

00:02:52.840 You're a creative guy.

00:02:53.840 I think you have a lot of value.

00:02:55.540 I appreciate that.

00:02:56.320 And I think that people would really, a lot of people, women included, gay people included, liberals included, 0.99

00:03:02.160 would really fuck with you if you started to kind of go back to that 0.99

00:03:05.140 or just come back a little bit more to the center 1.00

00:03:08.260 and just don't follow all these other people that are making money hand over fist like that.

00:03:12.780 It's not the right way.

00:03:13.820 I mean, it wasn't for money.

00:03:14.740 I lost so much talking about this.

00:03:16.800 I just got my YouTube channel back after three years, and YouTube apologized.

00:03:20.460 They said that I was right. 0.69

00:03:21.880 Like, I got banned for COVID misinformation.

00:03:24.140 And one thing that liberals agree with me on,

00:03:25.720 I was one of the first figures to say Free Palestine a year before October 7th,

00:03:30.560 and now every liberal is saying Free Palestine.

00:03:32.820 The third one was like, they said I was transphobic for calling out Chris Tyson on Mr. Beast's channel.

00:03:37.600 I said he was a pervert yeah I know I got so much backlash for that they said I hated him and like 0.87

00:03:43.060 I hated trans people and then they're like oh you actually you were right this guy should not be in 1.00

00:03:46.700 front of children I think people do need to listen better um but people will never listen to you if 0.97

00:03:51.520 you're angry and in their face and inflammatory so I think it needs to come from both parties

00:03:55.460 I think that like you I think that you could work on maybe uh talking to people and not such a uh

00:04:02.560 what's the way yeah an inflammatory way like this conversation this is not inflammatory

00:04:06.380 I know, but it's the opposite.

00:04:07.300 It's the solution.

00:04:07.760 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:04:08.220 It's the solution.

00:04:09.240 Don't try and bait people.

00:04:10.920 I think because nobody will ever, even if you're true, even if everything you speak is true,

00:04:16.280 if you're angry and you're yelling all the time, no one will ever listen to you.

00:04:19.540 And if you don't pick your words in a smart way, if you use derogatory words or start off with a derogatory statement,

00:04:27.140 people are going to turn you off immediately.

00:04:28.940 No matter if what you have to say is valid or not.

00:04:32.780 So I think that, yeah, I enjoyed this conversation with you, though.

00:04:36.320 And I appreciate you saying that. It was very nice to meet you.

00:04:38.740 It was nice to meet you.

00:04:39.500 Nice to meet you, too. I hope you guys have a good day.

00:04:46.400 Welcome back, guys. This is the first episode of the One Minute Podcast back on YouTube.

00:04:50.680 It feels nice to not have to stream this. It feels nostalgic today.

00:04:54.320 People have nice autumn clothes on. It's brisk outside.

00:04:58.020 Reminds me of the stand-up comedy days, and we're going to find out after all this time,

00:05:01.960 because it's been three years since I did this as a video.

00:05:05.340 What was your biggest change of mind?

00:05:08.100 Upstairs, somebody had a sign that said vaccines are pseudoscience.

00:05:12.800 And if you had that sign up maybe five years ago,

00:05:14.660 people here would go tear that down and say you're committing acts of violence.

00:05:18.340 But now everyone's like, yeah, you're right.

00:05:20.960 What was your biggest change of mind?

00:05:24.080 Give me a second.

00:05:26.820 Uh, sure. Okay.

00:05:29.360 thanks a lot man what's your name i'm emmy do you know that tennis player naomi osak are you

00:05:39.320 gonna say i look like her i mean i'm sure you got that before you have a minute and that's

00:05:43.500 what you say i have one minute okay so this is your train what is your biggest change of mind

00:05:47.940 biggest change of mind i think i was really insecure in like high school especially early

00:05:55.860 in high school and i didn't know that i could be alone and do things on my own for myself

00:06:00.640 and so i relied on a lot of different people um but now that i'm a little older i think i understand

00:06:07.380 that like i can rely on myself i can accomplish things on my own without like i guess asking

00:06:13.440 others were you in a lot of long-term relationships were you like dependent on your boyfriend

00:06:18.620 No.

00:06:20.320 Girlfriend, but also, no.

00:06:22.720 No, I'm not allowed to.

00:06:25.720 I'm not allowed to.

00:06:26.520 I don't judge.

00:06:29.200 No, I guess, yeah, okay, so I was in a really long-term relationship with her for, like, two and a half years.

00:06:34.240 I was relying on her in a lot of ways.

00:06:36.420 And then, like, before that, it was, like, my friends or, like, my mom because I was in high school and I lived with my parents.

00:06:43.300 But then, like, post-grad, I feel like living on my own in the city.

00:06:47.620 and just like doing things for myself became an independent queen yeah i'll take that what changed

00:06:54.660 what was the switch that flipped for you to become that i think the breakup it kind of forced me to

00:07:00.740 be on my own um and then also like going to therapy i guess and like talking through it

00:07:06.580 with someone who's like professional and could like guide me through that what did you learn

00:07:10.580 in therapy that you could not learn elsewhere ooh that's really hard because i learned a lot

00:07:15.700 in therapy every week um but something i like to tell people and that my therapist told me is that

00:07:21.860 your emotions are always valid even if they might not be justified and i think that's very important

00:07:30.900 for women to remember what does that mean valid um so okay i'm gonna do an example so let's just say

00:07:38.740 right now um i'm like oh i missed the train because of you i blame it on you even though

00:07:46.300 i agreed to like do this that's not justified right because i'm the one who made the decision

00:07:50.620 to sit down however it's still valid because it's what i'm feeling like anything you feel is valid

00:07:55.800 does that make sense because it's your like when something is valid it's like it means it's okay

00:08:04.620 that you're feeling that or even if it's wrong to feel that way it's still okay that you're

00:08:09.840 feeling that because those are your emotions does that make sense if you if you're mad at me for

00:08:15.640 missing your train i'm not gonna that was just an example of like the distinction between justified

00:08:20.280 and valid right should men go to therapy should men go to therapy i don't think therapy should 0.86

00:08:25.160 be gendered i think that if you can i mean therapy is you need to come from a place of privilege to

00:08:32.180 go to therapy but if you can afford it i would recommend anyone goes to therapy i think there's

00:08:36.760 this rhetoric of you have to have like a mental illness or you have to have something quote unquote

00:08:40.860 wrong with you to go to therapy but it can just you can go to therapy for something as negligible

00:08:46.980 as like i hate grocery shopping for my husband all the way to i'm trying to get out of a toxic

00:08:52.680 relationship whatever it is like you can go to therapy and you can find support what do you

00:08:56.960 think stops most women from being dependent and being independent there's a lot i mean there's a 0.95

00:09:02.420 lot of external factors right we live in a very patriarchal society so everyone does our condition

00:09:10.600 i mean everyone does right but one group of people benefits from it another group of people

00:09:16.460 is doesn't benefit from it right yeah i don't think so i think women would benefit from a 1.00

00:09:22.180 matriarchal society? I don't know. Let's take like a finance bro at JP Morgan. He's benefiting 1.00

00:09:28.320 off the patriarchy, right? Women have much higher standards that they have to reach. They just, 1.00

00:09:35.340 there is a glass ceiling for women. So I feel like that. You measure it on business terms. 1.00

00:09:41.140 I mean, but even, even the expectation that like women should stay at home and cook for their 1.00

00:09:47.420 husband take care of their husband something like that right is a deep-seated belief that's rooted

00:09:54.040 in centuries of patriarchy the pay is the patriarchy bad it's a patriarchy bad um let's say

00:10:03.780 that women not having equal opportunities simply because of their gender which is something that 0.98

00:10:12.300 they can't control, right? Nowadays you can. But let's just say, yeah, I mean, now we're, yeah,

00:10:18.860 now we're getting something else. But yeah, I mean, anyone who identifies as a woman,

00:10:22.700 they're going to face obstacles that have existed for a very long time. And so I do think it's bad

00:10:29.900 because these obstacles in some ways are arbitrary. What obstacles do you face right now that I don't

00:10:34.080 face? Because obstacles can mean a lot of things. I would say that women, let's talk about like 1.00

00:10:39.940 health women have to think a lot about their health in a way that men don't necessarily have

00:10:45.860 to um i had like a gynecology appointment yesterday and it was a moment where i thought

00:10:51.660 damn there are so many things that we have to do to make sure like we have like sexual health that

00:10:57.940 like men don't necessarily have to more appointments we have to book the procedures are more painful 0.99

00:11:03.900 for example like iud insertion it's super painful but we don't really get much warning or much like

00:11:11.620 support through it right like you get a little bit of a pill to open up your cervix and then

00:11:16.480 you might get a little bit of like lidocaine on your cervix to kind of um numb it but that's it

00:11:22.340 but it's a insurmountable amount of pain on the inverse though men die a lot younger and we have

00:11:28.240 a higher suicide rate because our expectations is that we have to take over the danger situations

00:11:33.840 and the provider and be the like if someone if an intruder comes in our house i'm the one who has

00:11:39.300 to go there with a gun and figure it out if somebody attacks us it's the man that's oftentimes

00:11:43.200 why i mean why we have a much shorter life expectancy than women so the health it's like

00:11:47.300 yes you deal with some things but so do we do if the titanic sinks if the titanic sinks you're going

00:11:52.380 on the lifeboats i'm i'm staying there and sinking playing the violin it's a great thing the titanic

00:11:56.640 doesn't exist anymore and that modern cruise ships have lifeboats for everyone but the idea

00:12:02.760 still exists and the expectation still does what idea that if things were to go south if an iceberg

00:12:08.300 was going to hit us that i have to protect it while you guys go in the lifeboat what goes south

00:12:12.760 that intruder comes in the home or somebody attacks or an invasion comes or that i live with

00:12:19.340 a man right but what like i live on my own what if someone intrudes am i going to rely on a man

00:12:24.160 No, I'm going to rely on myself.

00:12:25.580 You're the outlier, but for the...

00:12:28.100 My outlier?

00:12:29.280 Yeah, in a patriarchal society where there's families...

00:12:31.960 Okay, I wasn't sure what the baseline here was.

00:12:34.020 In a family.

00:12:35.580 Okay.

00:12:36.300 What does family mean to you?

00:12:38.280 Like a mother, father, and children.

00:12:40.260 Right.

00:12:41.060 If an intruder comes...

00:12:42.160 Traditional nuclear family.

00:12:43.580 Right.

00:12:43.960 Okay.

00:12:44.220 If an intruder comes, it's up to the man to protect in that situation.

00:12:48.340 That factors into why men have a shorter life expectancy.

00:12:50.840 My point is, yes, you have to deal with different health problems, but so do we.

00:12:55.340 We also have to put ourselves in different situations.

00:12:57.780 So it does balance.

00:12:59.800 But do you have to carry a baby for nine months and risk your life giving birth to that child?

00:13:05.040 No, but we have to deal with women our entire lives. 1.00

00:13:08.060 No, you don't. That's your own choice.

00:13:09.940 You make a decision.

00:13:12.020 You have autonomy. You're an adult, right?

00:13:13.900 I'm assuming you're over 18.

00:13:15.720 You have a decision.

00:13:16.960 You choose to get married.

00:13:18.380 You choose to have kids.

00:13:19.760 you choose to put your life at risk if an intruder breaks in.

00:13:25.420 Do you think the obstacles you face are the health?

00:13:29.880 I think that's one of them. That was one example.

00:13:32.080 But also, let's talk about sexual harassment, sexual assault.

00:13:37.000 That's another really big one that we can talk about.

00:13:40.140 Violent crime and suicide rate. We got that one.

00:13:43.140 i i don't think it's productive or effective for the sake of de-stigmatizing mental health

00:13:51.060 to gender suicide right like of course the the statistics and the numbers show that in the u.s

00:13:58.060 right you're saying in the u.s or globally globally men it's both it's it's overwhelmingly

00:14:04.020 men like over 80 percent over 80 percent of people who commit suicide victims are men yeah

00:14:08.920 okay so i guess in that sense if it is a overwhelming majority it is gender but i do

00:14:15.020 still think like i i personally don't think that we should gender things necessarily

00:14:24.380 we i think it is important to ask like why is it that young men are committing suicide

00:14:31.700 but i don't think it's productive the patriarchy doesn't exist if we're not going to gender that 0.61

00:14:35.900 then stop saying we live in a patriarchal society we just live in a society and this is how it is

00:14:39.660 don't gender that uh i think that's flawed that's a little bit applicationist that was what you just

00:14:48.300 said you said we shouldn't gender things right in an ideal world there's a difference between

00:14:54.040 an ideal world for me saying i don't think we should gender things and saying as a woman right 0.93

00:14:59.600 now just objectively statistically ask a sociologist ask an anthropologist right i'm not

00:15:06.000 i'm neither of those things even ask a scientist right women are at a disadvantage for a lot of 1.00

00:15:12.160 different reasons just because men statistically commit more suicide doesn't mean the patriarchy

00:15:18.060 doesn't exist right just following your line of logic that we shouldn't gender anything of logic 0.71

00:15:22.080 so we shouldn't gender things but that doesn't mean the patriarchy doesn't exist though you're

00:15:26.600 gendering it no now we're in a cyclical argument so i guess we can move on what was your biggest

00:15:32.140 change of mind in life my biggest change of mind i've maybe at about 40 i finally decided yeah i

00:15:40.500 can do this i only had fake confidence till i was 40 i don't know why i didn't believe i could do

00:15:47.180 anything but really you can so i wish i had realized that when i was 20 instead of 40 but

00:15:53.700 it's fine what is it that you did that you couldn't do before just work stuff you know

00:16:00.500 am i smart enough to learn am i tenacious enough to make progress you know uh i wanted to do this

00:16:09.920 one job and i never did it and then i started doing it i just maybe i was a problem the whole

00:16:15.820 time you know like just step into it do it bad and eventually you'll do it good yeah you know

00:16:22.600 what i mean like you gotta fail a couple times to succeed a million times and it's not even failure

00:16:26.560 what failure what's that doesn't even exist nobody cares everyone wants you to succeed

00:16:30.880 everyone they do you know especially here in new york if you fall down yeah i think someone will

00:16:37.620 pick you up and they'll say you'll be fine keep going i found it to be the opposite in a lot of

00:16:42.780 cases i found that yeah i think that i think your close family especially your mother doesn't really

00:16:47.420 want you to succeed because that means that she's not able to protect you the same way so she still

00:16:52.040 kind of wants you like with that that step where you break out and really succeed that's away from

00:16:56.500 her protection and also a lot of friends maybe not true friends a lot of them don't really want

00:17:00.900 you to succeed because their time you spent hanging out you are they're happy because you're

00:17:04.340 playing you're both you're all losers and then once you're out a small ball it's safe right but 0.73

00:17:08.600 my mother says something when she goes you know the first time you let your kid cross the street 0.99

00:17:11.660 without holding their hand they're they're moving on their own like you know that's yeah but but it's

00:17:19.240 It happens fast, you know.

00:17:21.480 Well, I hope your mother wants you to succeed.

00:17:24.280 You look confident, and here you are.

00:17:27.260 You've got your subway table going.

00:17:30.180 You've got the pumpkins, too.

00:17:30.980 You've got the pumpkins.

00:17:32.220 You've got some seasonal action going here.

00:17:36.880 What is this podcast?

00:17:37.960 I'm just trying to figure out where New Yorkers are at mentally.

00:17:41.240 What you said is interesting.

00:17:42.440 What do you think was holding you back?

00:17:43.960 Me.

00:17:44.820 Just waiting for permission.

00:17:47.220 what's that you don't need permission did anyone give you permission to be here today

00:17:53.440 you thought it you did it you could just do things you could do them great

00:17:59.140 everyone is much you know don't wait for approval don't wait for permission just do it

00:18:06.440 if somebody wants to stop you they will but they won't you know they won't and you'll figure it

00:18:12.720 out you're so much you're everyone's very clever they are I think you know you said that you had

00:18:20.800 fake confidence what is the difference between fake and real confidence you know moving forward

00:18:26.560 I was just you know fitting in pretending I was like everyone else and then at some point you've

00:18:32.340 got to take bold action you know you're going to ask people for help you got to tell them you don't

00:18:38.920 know look i want to do this thing but i don't know anything about it can you help me that takes a lot

00:18:44.900 of takes a lot of courage you know to ask for help everyone's always acting like they know

00:18:50.600 everything but if you ask them sincerely they'll probably help you you know they'll probably help

00:18:59.440 you if you show that you are sincere and you're going to do the work you know i always wanted to

00:19:06.040 I always wanted to like narrate and talk

00:19:09.700 be on like the radio, on television

00:19:11.760 You have the radio voice, you sound like Opie and Anthony

00:19:13.620 Yeah, so you know

00:19:15.500 people who are nursing or pregnant

00:19:17.720 or may become pregnant

00:19:18.840 should not take Wigo V

00:19:21.640 or whatever they take

00:19:22.640 I was like I want to do that

00:19:24.540 but I didn't know how

00:19:25.760 and I knew some people who did it

00:19:27.460 but I was afraid to ask them

00:19:28.580 because I was ashamed

00:19:30.840 like that I didn't know anything

00:19:32.980 but eventually I got over my bad self

00:19:35.220 And I asked a lot of questions.

00:19:36.980 And I went here and I went there and I went there and there.

00:19:38.980 Now I do it all the time.

00:19:40.400 That's what I do.

00:19:41.820 You know?

00:19:42.460 I do a lot of narrating, TV, radio stuff.

00:19:44.780 Do you do books too?

00:19:45.940 Yeah.

00:19:46.820 I don't like the books though.

00:19:48.140 I did four.

00:19:49.080 It's too long.

00:19:50.200 It was lonely.

00:19:51.100 It was like being at a party.

00:19:53.240 You're the only guest, you know?

00:19:55.240 And you've got to really focus.

00:19:58.540 Can I hear the radio voice?

00:20:00.120 Can you do an ad for this pumpkin?

00:20:01.360 I just tried.

00:20:03.760 The trick is, just be you.

00:20:06.440 So, coming up on Halloween here in New York City, we've got some pumpkins here.

00:20:10.740 Everyone loves them.

00:20:11.580 Everyone wants one.

00:20:12.820 Puts you in the spirit.

00:20:13.700 Puts you in the mood.

00:20:14.740 Hey, be nice to yourself.

00:20:16.460 Get yourself a pumpkin.

00:20:18.080 You'll love it.

00:20:18.940 I'm going to buy it now.

00:20:20.040 What was your biggest change of mind in life? 0.98

00:20:23.240 Getting the fuck out of the house. 0.97

00:20:25.380 Be on the street streets. 0.98

00:20:27.480 Being in Marshall Square Park after dark.

00:20:29.400 Living there for about four or five months. 0.99

00:20:32.920 It's like some crazy shit going down there, man. 0.99

00:20:35.740 Like what? 0.99

00:20:36.160 What's the craziest thing you've seen?

00:20:37.260 People get stabbed. 0.82

00:20:38.260 Someone's shitting themselves. 1.00

00:20:40.200 Someone's throwing shit at each other. 0.99

00:20:42.600 Like, you name it. 0.99

00:20:43.980 I've seen it all.

00:20:45.180 You like the craziness?

00:20:46.320 Oh, yeah.

00:20:46.820 I'm addicted to danger.

00:20:48.500 I don't know why.

00:20:49.780 It's like the more ghetto of places, the more home I feel.

00:20:52.500 I don't know why.

00:20:53.280 It's just like I communicate with everybody so I can understand the struggle, this and that.

00:20:59.160 What's the most dangerous thing you've done? 1.00

00:21:00.240 fucking 0.99

00:21:02.300 climbing a building 1.00

00:21:03.940 and fucking 0.99

00:21:05.360 just like 1.00

00:21:06.040 smoking fucking 1.00

00:21:07.060 fat ass blunt 1.00

00:21:07.860 like fucking 1.00

00:21:11.520 just chilling 1.00

00:21:12.100 and hanging up

00:21:12.740 yeah

00:21:14.400 one sec

00:21:15.600 yep I'm going back on 0.99

00:21:16.760 I ain't fucking 0.99

00:21:17.480 gonna be no dumbass 1.00

00:21:18.600 fucking fool 1.00

00:21:19.160 so shit 1.00

00:21:19.820 be safe out there 1.00

00:21:21.560 huh

00:21:22.100 nice to meet you man

00:21:24.340 nice to meet you 1.00

00:21:25.140 I watched this shit 1.00

00:21:25.860 a long time 1.00

00:21:26.380 kick and everything

00:21:27.160 the whole ranch

00:21:29.120 and everything 1.00

00:21:29.520 the fucking 0.99

00:21:30.000 What's the thing? 0.99

00:21:31.280 The Two Fit Podcast? 1.00

00:21:33.560 That shit was funny as shit. 1.00

00:21:35.580 I was dying. 1.00

00:21:37.080 I don't know how you watch it.

00:21:37.860 You don't have a phone.

00:21:39.100 A while ago.

00:21:39.900 Because I was isolated for four years in the house.

00:21:43.760 No sunlight, nothing.

00:21:44.980 No sunlight.

00:21:45.580 Nothing.

00:21:46.020 I didn't leave.

00:21:46.380 You had no sunlight for four years.

00:21:47.600 Yes.

00:21:48.160 And I'm still alive. 0.99

00:21:49.840 You're a freak of nature. 0.98

00:21:51.280 In a good way. 0.92

00:21:52.120 In a good way.

00:21:52.600 I think like the cockroaches 0.75

00:21:54.320 I'll survive a nuclear holocaust. 0.98

00:21:55.720 Oh, hell no.

00:21:56.980 Okay. 0.94

00:21:57.280 i used to be republican and i used to be straight now i it's pretty big now i am very gay and very

00:22:07.160 not republican yeah how did you come to that conclusion uh went to school at brown

00:22:11.720 yeah what was it at brown it's a funny name for a school to become gay at you found out you were 0.98

00:22:19.160 Gaia Brown. It's oh god oh god um yeah very queer friendly school was just introduced to a lot of

00:22:29.980 ideas I was not exposed to in high school. If you had to write a scene of your movie you know of

00:22:35.200 your life movie what was the scene that like was it the switch that flipped? I came from like a

00:22:40.880 refugee house in New Mexico um there was yeah like I didn't really meet too many people outside

00:22:48.660 of my small little viet community and then i went to brown and i met like oh my god there's like

00:22:53.380 black people jewish people international people people with like just like just people from all

00:23:00.180 over the world different walks of life and i was like oh the world is just a lot bigger than my own

00:23:05.160 than my little bubble the idea that new york city was a place where um you're gonna make it in new

00:23:12.080 york city i believe new york city makes you moved here and realized that yeah it totally like i came 0.94

00:23:17.320 here like i'm gonna be the shit and like i'm gonna be the number one and everyone's gonna care about 0.93

00:23:21.640 me and like no one really cares about anyone we're all trying our best to figure out how to make it 0.97

00:23:26.500 through the world i don't know every word to say i say the wrong thing someone hates it um i try to

00:23:31.740 make it there's 6 000 other people going for the same application as you and i think what i've

00:23:35.980 learned is that new york city has so many wonderful opportunities for you right where you are wherever

00:23:39.860 you are in life and it's sort of your job to just like take that as a blessing and to uh honor it

00:23:46.240 and and and hone it yeah what did you expect before you came here that you were gonna take

00:23:51.920 it over it was everyone thinks they're just gonna take every that everything's just gonna be given

00:23:55.040 to them or that they're gonna be the first one on the list there's competition for a reason and

00:23:59.120 there's i don't think it's a bad thing and i think um i think people become very jaded because they're

00:24:04.880 not succeeding and i've been through i've been through loss of job loss of home it hasn't stopped

00:24:12.560 me honestly it's just really kind of grounded me as a new yorker and just made me love like

00:24:18.640 the the hustle sure but like the the the life of a new yorker sometimes there's struggle sometimes

00:24:24.620 there's wins i feel like i i kind of matured a bit when i was able to lose things and just

00:24:30.940 gain a sense of understanding about um new york city has so much for you where you are

00:24:37.280 and you don't have to always climb there's so much there's so much even when there's little

00:24:42.840 it sounds like you've been humbled in a good way what was there what was that character development

00:24:48.380 scene if you had to write it homelessness yeah um people have such a such a stigma about that

00:24:57.040 and i understand why from uh from not being homeless in my life to being homeless in my life

00:25:04.160 I can understand the stigma, where it comes from.

00:25:06.860 But what I think I've learned is when you watch so many people leave you behind

00:25:12.280 and forget about who you are and don't want to communicate with you

00:25:15.080 because you're experiencing this hardship,

00:25:17.300 you're able to then recognize...

00:25:20.700 Because you see people going through worse.

00:25:22.180 You see people on high struggle on drugs.

00:25:24.660 Being homeless isn't the same as being hopeless.

00:25:26.840 And so some of these people on the streets that are going through homelessness,

00:25:31.100 they're not just homeless, they're hopeless.

00:25:32.940 And you're not that.

00:25:33.780 And so you witnessed that, and you were humbled, and you were able to, I don't know, be mature about, like, okay, this is part of my struggle.

00:25:41.260 I mean, look at all my favorite artists, you know, Viola Davis.

00:25:45.520 Look at, what's his name? Tyler Perry.

00:25:49.160 Like, homelessness is part of their story.

00:25:51.680 And I think it's often talked about how great and fantastic they are.

00:25:57.840 But we're not talking about, like, the climb to get there.

00:26:01.740 It's part of the story. It's part of a New Yorker story.

00:26:03.780 I was able to gain this understanding from losing it all.

00:26:11.160 I think I gained it all from that.

00:26:13.080 You seem happy that you had to deal with that.

00:26:14.940 It's a good thing.

00:26:15.640 Yeah, I don't live in this privileged mindset of,

00:26:19.180 look at me, I'm a king of the world,

00:26:21.760 and every single little thing that happens to me

00:26:24.380 is the worst thing that can happen to me,

00:26:25.860 and woe is me, and my boyfriend broke up with me. 0.74

00:26:28.060 It's just ridiculous the way that people live.

00:26:30.120 I don't live this way.

00:26:30.980 I genuinely want to take my time to care about other people.

00:26:34.340 When I see other people in pain, it hurts because I've been through pain and I understand what that's like.

00:26:39.980 But the worst thing to witness is someone being hopeless.

00:26:42.540 And honestly, I had to fight through the homelessness and joblessness to find hope.

00:26:48.040 And through that, I found so much strength and so much power.

00:26:50.900 And I wish people would understand that if you lose something, it is for your betterment.

00:26:54.780 If you are able to hold faith and be strong through it, this is a beautiful blessing of life.

00:27:02.180 You're right, completely.

00:27:03.660 I think deciding not to be shy, even though I still am shy in some ways.

00:27:09.780 When I went to college, I actually went right here.

00:27:13.680 When I first got there, you know, everybody was, you know, going up to everyone and saying hello and everything.

00:27:21.820 So that kind of made it easy.

00:27:23.060 but when i didn't have that crutch i was just like yo being shy is gonna get me absolutely nothing

00:27:31.160 so i just decided to like i don't know i'm extroverted to fierce it and do like a

00:27:37.000 alter ego kind of thing do you think anyone's actually introverted or are they just shy

00:27:41.820 um i think i think that there could be some people who are introverted um but i i wrote you know what

00:27:51.660 And this is super weird, but, like, you know how most people don't have memories

00:27:56.660 until they're, like, three or five years old or whatever?

00:28:00.540 I remember the day I became shy.

00:28:04.000 I was two years old.

00:28:05.460 And I was at church.

00:28:06.800 I went up to this lady, and I was like, hi, you know?

00:28:10.000 And she laughed.

00:28:12.080 And I thought she was probably laughing, like, aw, I'm so cute, right?

00:28:15.480 She was humiliating you. 0.99

00:28:16.520 Yeah, I thought she was laughing at me.

00:28:18.260 And I remember, like, hiding behind my mother's leg, and then I became shy that day.

00:28:26.200 And I was, like, painfully, painfully, painfully shy for the remainder of my childhood.

00:28:32.240 How did you realize that, that that was what made you shy?

00:28:34.980 Because I remembered it. It was, like, a traumatic event.

00:28:38.440 So while you were shy, you remembered that being the reason?

00:28:41.820 I don't know, but I was told I was a really, like, bubbly baby, would go to anyone, always smiling.

00:28:48.260 And then I remember that day becoming shy, like just weird stuff.

00:28:55.100 Like my mom would ask me to like in a restaurant, go ask the waitress for some napkins or whatever. 0.99

00:29:00.560 And I'd be like, you know, like just crazy shy.

00:29:05.560 So there were a few different levels of me like emerging from it.

00:29:11.160 One was in eighth grade, one was in 11th grade, and then one was in college.

00:29:16.840 how would you advise people get out of their shyness the way you did um just know that you

00:29:24.940 there's no easy way to do it you know like you're gonna be nervous to do something you haven't ever

00:29:31.940 done before but um i think also because i'm an only child i have to like go out and and get

00:29:41.320 There's no already group of people waiting to, like, you know,

00:29:46.980 I have to, like, break into somebody else's club or clique or whatever all the time, you know?

00:29:53.960 So I think just, like I said, I just decided to, like, I'm going to just form an alter ego

00:30:01.920 or go into a different part of my mind or something.

00:30:05.060 What was your biggest change of mind in life?

00:30:08.260 Biggest change of mind.

00:30:09.760 What do you mean in what sense?

00:30:11.180 like with work or with life or some people said like i found out i was gay some people said i

00:30:16.800 realized i was depressed some people said i gave up drugs you know there was a change of mind some

00:30:21.000 people said i used to be republican you know something that drastically change your mind

00:30:24.380 that drastically changed your life forever what was that i realized that i mean i love new zealand

00:30:30.380 but i realized that there's a lot more to life than just a small country um and that i realized

00:30:36.020 is that there are so many more cultures and communities

00:30:39.000 and people out in the big world that is worth getting to know.

00:30:44.160 And so I just wanted to get out and experience life

00:30:47.180 and sort of see what's out there

00:30:48.440 instead of staying confined into a small country or a small community

00:30:52.940 and sort of make the most of what life is and what we get given.

00:30:57.340 And living on the Lord of the Rings set forever.

00:30:59.420 Exactly. I know.

00:31:00.700 I was like, I've got to go experience the big world.

00:31:03.120 What was the change? What made you realize that?

00:31:06.020 I mean, I was very fortunate.

00:31:07.380 My mom kind of got us out and traveling.

00:31:10.100 She was a travel agent, so she kind of got us out and exploring,

00:31:13.360 and I sort of realized, I was like, you know what,

00:31:15.020 this is a life that I want to live, and my work involves that.

00:31:18.420 I work on super yachts, so I kind of have this extravagant life

00:31:21.980 of being able to travel overseas and meet incredible people,

00:31:25.740 and it sort of gets me out, and it's really, really cool.

00:31:27.520 What is one experience that you've had or one story that you could share

00:31:31.380 that other people have not experienced?

00:31:33.380 I guess with working on super yachts I've seen what that one percent live I've seen how they live

00:31:39.540 and all I can say is having the wealth doesn't actually give you what you think it could give

00:31:46.200 you I mean it gives you some form of experiences but it doesn't give you the happiness that I feel

00:31:52.240 like some people crave they think once I get a million dollars or once I get once I've made it

00:31:58.240 and I get that first million, like, I will have the rest of my life set.

00:32:02.460 I feel like a lot of people, once they get that, they just kind of keep chasing

00:32:06.180 and they never actually find that true happiness.

00:32:09.140 And I think once you find happiness in yourself

00:32:12.960 and find happiness in the smaller things in life,

00:32:16.020 you really get to make the most of, or you really get to start living your life.

00:32:20.200 Don't try to chase the millions because it doesn't actually give you

00:32:24.660 what you may think it might give you.

00:32:26.320 you've seen some unhappy rich people very very unhappy rich people yeah so you go in somewhere

00:32:32.000 special a wine bar i like your scarf thank you is it a date no who are you going with 0.86

00:32:39.680 them johns okay third reeling nope he's gay okay what's your what was your biggest change of mind

00:32:47.900 in life my biggest change of mind maybe just that the only way i can be happy is to be sober

00:32:54.280 it's kind of what i'm dealing with right now so going to a wine bar from other things

00:32:59.420 but i i would eventually like to but i've never struggled with alcohol so

00:33:03.980 yeah how did you realize that it's difficult to change i feel like just once it gets to that

00:33:11.140 point like once you realize like you can't stop despite like negative consequences it kind of

00:33:15.580 just like like i don't know i just i was at rock bottom i was really depressed um

00:33:23.560 like never had thoughts like that before and it was just like okay like i am no longer myself

00:33:31.780 like i kind of lost myself ever since i started using substances and yeah i think it's just like

00:33:38.840 in order for me to like truly be myself and like find myself i need to be sober well you seem like

00:33:43.600 you're in a happier place now yeah i mean i i just hit rock bottom recently so you can only go up

00:33:50.120 Okay.

00:33:50.560 Are you grateful for learning those lessons?

00:33:53.060 Do you think that you?

00:33:54.760 Yeah.

00:33:55.380 I mean, there's a lot of people in my family that struggle with addiction.

00:33:58.020 So, like, I'm glad I'm learning it this young because I do think it could get a lot worse.

00:34:05.800 But, yeah.

00:34:08.160 What advice would you give to people who are struggling with this?

00:34:11.840 Get treatment.

00:34:13.080 Go on medical leave if you need to from work.

00:34:16.340 Tell people.

00:34:17.740 Don't keep it a secret.

00:34:19.260 Um, yeah, just, like, put yourself first before a job, before anything, before a relationship.

00:34:26.180 Work on your mental health.

00:34:27.500 What was your biggest change of mind in life?

00:34:30.220 My biggest change of mind?

00:34:32.060 Um, well, since you're asking, I think that you have to decide to be happy.

00:34:38.420 I feel like sometimes you feel like, oh, you know, it's something like that, right?

00:34:41.740 I feel like sometimes you feel like, oh, you're just supposed to, like, happiness is supposed to come.

00:34:46.260 But I think you have to decide to be happy.

00:34:47.900 Like, you can't just think that, like, oh, I'm going to wake up happy.

00:34:52.400 You have to decide, okay, this is what I'm going through right now.

00:34:54.840 This is what I'm experiencing.

00:34:56.040 And you have different moments where you're like, okay, I'm happy because of this.

00:34:59.560 I'm happy because of that.

00:35:00.340 You have to make the effort to actually be happy.

00:35:02.800 Okay.

00:35:03.260 Yeah.

00:35:03.760 When did you realize that, and what was the switch that flipped?

00:35:07.360 I don't want to get so morbid.

00:35:08.700 My mom had breast cancer, and this was back in, like, 2019, 2018.

00:35:13.240 She had breast cancer, and I was just like, dang.

00:35:16.420 Like, we're going to chemo.

00:35:17.900 I'm so sad.

00:35:18.980 But she was like, no, we have science.

00:35:21.220 We have something that can figure it out.

00:35:22.520 Let's think positive.

00:35:23.720 And I was like, you know what, for the fact that you're the one that's actually going through this,

00:35:26.720 you're experiencing this, and you're deciding to be happy, let me also decide to be happy.

00:35:31.800 So, yeah.

00:35:32.480 Did she survive?

00:35:33.240 Oh, yeah, she did.

00:35:33.880 She got a mastectomy.

00:35:34.940 Yeah, exactly.

00:35:35.860 She decided to be happy.

00:35:37.120 And I think, like, a lot of people are like, oh, when you're going through that process,

00:35:40.140 if you're positive about it, you're, even though it's, like, it's whatever is going to happen.

00:35:44.960 But if you're positive about it, you'll have a better outcome.

00:35:47.460 yeah so she had a good outcome and it's i have her to this very day so i'm just happy about that

00:35:53.200 i think that goes with everything in life it's always better to remove any negative thoughts

00:35:58.580 in every situation what advice would you have for people in their 20s because you're saying 0.95

00:36:02.540 you had that realization in your 40s a little off a little off to be don't fucking waste your youth 0.92

00:36:08.740 and promise on on drugs and alcohol because it's just going to slow you down you know even if you 0.97

00:36:15.660 don't die you know it's a waste of time get on with it get on with what you really really want

00:36:21.920 to do because you can make a lot of progress fast when you still got that sparkle and people in

00:36:27.380 their 20s they got that shine still you know they got youth and beauty and and promise don't waste

00:36:35.120 it get on with it you know see where it takes you you'll be you'll be thrilled you'll be thrilled

00:36:41.180 do you think it's a balance or should it be sobriety no it's like a balance just like you

00:36:45.320 know don't give it more than it's due you know like because it is mostly a waste of time it's

00:36:51.680 fun it's it's a lot of fun it's a lot of fun i mean but don't waste your time you know having

00:36:58.020 fun a waste of time no but i mean it's not going to get you anywhere you know there's a lot more

00:37:03.100 exciting things you can be doing and uh i mean i threw my youth away with both hands just like

00:37:07.720 everyone else you know but like i wish i had just just gotten to it a little faster you know like i

00:37:15.520 look at you here you are doing your thing you got a cameraman you got an organization you got like a

00:37:20.640 guy who gets new victims and he's good and like you know you have some organization going i didn't

00:37:27.400 have no organization going tell me your name again i forgot sneeko tell me sneeko sneeko what's your

00:37:35.280 Jim Jim Jim thanks so much for coming thanks for and good luck you have a good

00:37:39.540 dinner you're going someplace man this is Sneeko Sneeko New York City West 4th

00:37:45.720 Street where everything's happening you know why I'm here cuz Sneeko's here the

00:37:51.520 full three-hour version of this podcast is available on patreon I finally

00:37:55.040 reopened it and I'm also releasing the kind of quality podcast with Cass again

00:37:59.160 the first episode is up on there along with all my editing tutorials and years

00:38:03.640 of content finally re-released.

SHNEAKO - November 08, 2025

What's Your Biggest Change of Mind？

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