Stay Free - Russel Brand - March 06, 2026


Crack On: The Phenomenon of Craving and the Spiritual Roots of Addiction — SF688


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 1 minute

Words per Minute

189.87567

Word Count

11,709

Sentence Count

1,065

Misogynist Sentences

27

Hate Speech Sentences

26


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Russell Brand is joined by comedian Jake Chapman to discuss the Jim Kerry clone conspiracy, and whether or not it's real or not. Plus, the return of the Satan's MMA event, and a new segment called Crack on where we talk about addiction.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Stay Free - Russel Brand" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:07.000 Ladies and gentlemen, Russell Brand, actually Russell Russell Brand, trying to bring real journalism to the American people.
00:00:17.000 Hello there, you awakening wonders.
00:00:18.000 Thanks for joining us today for Stay Free with Russell Brand.
00:00:21.000 What a special edition it is because we'll also be doing crack on where we talk about addiction.
00:00:24.000 You're probably an addict, are you?
00:00:25.000 No, I'm not.
00:00:26.000 I'm fine.
00:00:26.000 Yes, you are.
00:00:27.000 Why are you looking at that porn all the time?
00:00:29.000 Why are you always at your winkie woo, pulling away at it?
00:00:32.000 These questions and more will be answered over the next hour, not just by me, but also by Jake.
00:00:37.000 You're ready with that guitar, aren't you, mate?
00:00:39.000 I know, I picked it up and don't know what to do with it now.
00:00:41.000 Yeah, you're stuck with it.
00:00:42.000 You're just stuck with it now.
00:00:43.000 Like when we've been doing our live shows, been pretty funny, haven't they?
00:00:46.000 I've enjoyed those.
00:00:47.000 They've been good.
00:00:48.000 We should do more.
00:00:49.000 Let's do more live shows.
00:00:50.000 Let's go on a tent revival tour of the United States of America.
00:00:53.000 Dave, get some investment, will you?
00:00:55.000 Get some investment, Dave, to the tent revival tour.
00:00:58.000 We're going to get Joe over here.
00:01:00.000 We've got lots of things to consider.
00:01:01.000 Massey's over there with the Satan.
00:01:04.000 MMA event or the MMA joint.
00:01:06.000 Yeah, that's good.
00:01:07.000 We've got so many good things to talk about.
00:01:08.000 All right, look, what am I supposed to start off doing first of all?
00:01:11.000 Jesus crucifixion.
00:01:12.000 Is that one?
00:01:12.000 Or do you want to still want to talk about Charlotte Boeff?
00:01:15.000 We've talked about that.
00:01:16.000 Do you want to talk about Jim Kerry clone conspiracy?
00:01:19.000 Who's brought that up?
00:01:20.000 You, I think.
00:01:23.000 Is it good?
00:01:23.000 I don't understand it.
00:01:24.000 But let's get into it.
00:01:25.000 Let's get right into it right away without any more of this silly nonsense.
00:01:30.000 Okay, so a lot of people think Jim Kerry has been masquerading as a version of himself.
00:01:36.000 Let's have a look if it's real or not.
00:01:38.000 Is this the real Jim Kerry?
00:01:39.000 It does look a bit different, but like people have their facial surgery, don't they, in Hollywood?
00:01:42.000 That's the way it goes.
00:01:44.000 You know, I wrote it and I researched it and I practiced it like crazy, but you know, it's uh that's not Jim Kerry, Jim Kerry's not like that.
00:01:53.000 That's not how Jim Kerry behaves.
00:01:54.000 That's Dave's father-in-law.
00:01:56.000 That's Kenny.
00:01:57.000 That's Dave's.
00:01:58.000 That's that's Dave's father-in-law.
00:01:59.000 Ah, Nurse Nikki.
00:02:01.000 Ah, nurse.
00:02:02.000 Oh, Nurse Nikki.
00:02:03.000 That's Kenny.
00:02:04.000 Here we are.
00:02:05.000 Thank you.
00:02:06.000 Jake, that's a reference that's impossible to instantiate for our wider audience.
00:02:10.000 Thank you very, very much.
00:02:11.000 Thank you, Nurse Nikki.
00:02:12.000 You are most beloved, cherished, and treasured.
00:02:14.000 Let's have a look at more.
00:02:15.000 That's no way in.
00:02:16.000 That's no way him.
00:02:17.000 But, you know, it's then I watched everybody like talking a thousand miles an hour.
00:02:24.000 The thing is, is for Jim Kerry, he's got very unique genius, and the way that he moves and communicates is like no one else in the world.
00:02:31.000 That's just some bloke.
00:02:33.000 Talking a thousand miles an hour up there, receiving their rewards, and I was like, I'm dead.
00:02:40.000 But, and I made mistakes, and I was like.
00:02:43.000 All right, let's have a look at this.
00:02:44.000 This is the makeup artist, Alexis something or another, that says that they are him.
00:02:48.000 Check it.
00:02:49.000 It's just come out that this was an impersonator.
00:02:52.000 The person who's taken credit for the performance is Alexis Stone, who's a known artist who has done this before.
00:02:59.000 Alexis stating that they had done it on Instagram not long ago and showing a bit of the process.
00:03:05.000 They're better known for the work from Kim Kardashian turning her into a lizard.
00:03:11.000 Here's some of the other work from the past and obviously impersonating known people is something that this person has done before.
00:03:19.000 That's pretty good.
00:03:20.000 That'd be a good person.
00:03:21.000 Say if you were dogged with unending promiscuity, like you just couldn't be faithful, go out with that Alexis Stone.
00:03:28.000 He can dress up as a whole variety of people.
00:03:30.000 Every day of the week, a new person.
00:03:33.000 One night you're laying down with Stephen Hawking.
00:03:36.000 There he is crunched over in his chair.
00:03:39.000 The next night, why, you're having dinner with Billie Eilish.
00:03:42.000 The day after that, a snog with Jem Carey.
00:03:46.000 It's Ayatollah, Khumani.
00:03:46.000 Who's this?
00:03:48.000 Oh, like every day, a different, like, what a great way to live, no?
00:03:53.000 I don't know.
00:03:54.000 Like, no, it's just immoral.
00:03:55.000 What's wrong with me?
00:03:55.000 It's disgusting.
00:03:56.000 But that was not Jim Carey.
00:03:58.000 I love Dave's disgust on most things.
00:04:01.000 I could see Jim Carrey doing that on purpose, right?
00:04:04.000 Like, he doesn't want to be there, so just send somebody else.
00:04:07.000 It's good.
00:04:07.000 Like, well, he's also, you know, played Andy Kaufman.
00:04:10.000 And Andy Kaufman, your great American comedic genius, former SNL cast member and Taxi, the sitcom star, was all about creating bizarre situations and he had altered egos and all that.
00:04:21.000 This is all chronicled in the excellent Milos Foreman movie Man On The Moon and also the REM song.
00:04:28.000 Man In The Moon was somewhat about Andy Kaufman who would challenge his audiences by doing like mad things, like reading books, and he was one of them brilliant geniuses that straddled the line between art and entertainment, often pushing it too too like too far towards art which sort of has challenges in it like, for example, a certain plucky young guy astray out of Essex, not content just to make people laugh, when he was still a crack and heroin addict, would get involved in tossing people off and doing weird stuff.
00:04:58.000 That's because I was nice.
00:04:59.000 Me and Massey were talking about it offline, because when Tommy Robinson came on the show we'll be showing you some uh, some of that.
00:05:05.000 It's going to be our show on Monday, the interview tomorrow.
00:05:07.000 It's very enjoyable because I think it's very human points, confrontational but generally pretty interesting conversation.
00:05:13.000 But I accidentally, as I mentioned in the show the other day, brought up that in this show that I'd done psychological jackass.
00:05:19.000 I called it, I tossed off a fella in a toilet and And Tommy Robinson, he couldn't go beyond it.
00:05:26.000 He said, I didn't even ask.
00:05:28.000 You told me that.
00:05:31.000 It really blew his mind.
00:05:33.000 But really, at that point, I was sort of, like as a comedian, I was doing like really weird stuff on stage.
00:05:38.000 Like, you know, like I brought locusts into the room and let them all loose.
00:05:43.000 I got dead animals and smashed them up with a hammer.
00:05:46.000 I don't believe it, man.
00:05:47.000 Old Russ.
00:05:47.000 Not you.
00:05:48.000 Some people, not you.
00:05:50.000 It was old Russ that was doing these things.
00:05:52.000 Having weird fights, being wet.
00:05:55.000 Where was that?
00:05:57.000 Well, it was when I was like, this really weird thing happened where this guy gave me and me and my mate Matt, I think it was 500 quid, but that, like, it was 20 or 30 years ago, 30 years ago, guess probably.
00:06:08.000 And that was so much money that it blew my mind to have 500 quid, right?
00:06:12.000 And with this 500 quid, like, he goes, you've got to perform.
00:06:15.000 I'm doing this night.
00:06:16.000 He was promoting a band and he just wanted us to warm up for this band.
00:06:19.000 They were no good, this band.
00:06:21.000 Anyway, right, I was like, I couldn't write any material because I wasn't like that.
00:06:25.000 I didn't like to write material.
00:06:26.000 A bit like now, really.
00:06:27.000 I prefer just to, you know, make it up.
00:06:29.000 I'm so sorry.
00:06:30.000 Thanks for watching this, by the way.
00:06:31.000 If you haven't got Rumble Premium yet, get Rumble Premium now.
00:06:34.000 And if you're watching this on YouTube, come over to Rumble, right?
00:06:37.000 And like, so like, I just went to this nightclub to do a warm-up for this band.
00:06:40.000 I had dead mice and rats that I'd acquired from a pet shop.
00:06:44.000 They were really python food.
00:06:45.000 I'd dressed them up in little costumes, like Barbie costumes.
00:06:48.000 Then like they were, some of them were Ford.
00:06:49.000 Some of them were still like frozen.
00:06:51.000 I had little wigs on.
00:06:52.000 I was doing shows with them.
00:06:54.000 The audience was like, the audience said, not ever.
00:06:57.000 It never went well.
00:06:59.000 Not once.
00:07:00.000 But like, not once.
00:07:01.000 But I persisted.
00:07:02.000 I persisted.
00:07:03.000 I did it show after show.
00:07:05.000 I was determined that it was brilliant.
00:07:06.000 I've got it on video, like loads of it.
00:07:08.000 I said, like, I did it live at markets and stuff, confronting people with it.
00:07:12.000 People going, are they, oh, yeah, what's happening?
00:07:15.000 Like, little, like, I do like little sort of cockney voices like that.
00:07:18.000 Hello, darling.
00:07:19.000 You're like, oh, I've just been down to the abortion clinic.
00:07:22.000 Oh, no, darling.
00:07:23.000 All life's sacred.
00:07:24.000 And then like a little baby mouse coming out.
00:07:26.000 Anyway, like it was just unusual what I was doing.
00:07:29.000 Then there'd be a bit where I'd get angry with them and smash them up with a hammer.
00:07:31.000 You have footage of that.
00:07:33.000 There's footage.
00:07:33.000 Yeah, there's footage.
00:07:35.000 You want to see it?
00:07:36.000 I've got it, baby.
00:07:36.000 No problem.
00:07:37.000 And then like other things was like, I got locusts.
00:07:40.000 Basically, it was because I think when I went to this pet shop, Parkway Pets in Camden in North London where I was living at that time, like they sold locusts and rats and mice and stuff.
00:07:48.000 So I don't know.
00:07:49.000 I just thought it's interesting this.
00:07:52.000 Anyway, with the 500 quid that I got, me and my mate Matt, we booked a barge, like a canal boat out in the Norfolk Broads.
00:07:59.000 Went there.
00:08:00.000 Problem was I was like a drug addict.
00:08:01.000 So like when you're in the Norfolk Broads, if you're a drug addict and, you know, let's be honest, a sex addict, once I was on the barge, I was like, oh no, who am I going to have sex with?
00:08:12.000 Where am I going to get drugs from?
00:08:14.000 Well, so we had to pull over, pull the barge over.
00:08:16.000 We'd crashed it a couple of times because, you know, I weren't good at driving the barge.
00:08:20.000 So we went into the town of Norwich to have sex with this prostitute.
00:08:23.000 Now this poor lady, she weren't in a good state at all.
00:08:27.000 Her husband was pimping her out.
00:08:28.000 Her husband and her husband's brother were brassing her.
00:08:31.000 She was doing all the work.
00:08:32.000 They were doing all the smack.
00:08:33.000 It was no way to live, really.
00:08:35.000 Anyway, when I arrived there, I was like, it was not an option.
00:08:40.000 I mean, this poor lady, no gnashes and all that.
00:08:42.000 She didn't even have a full set.
00:08:43.000 She was all banged up on the GAC, falling apart at the seams.
00:08:47.000 So I had to go, listen, love.
00:08:49.000 There's for your time.
00:08:50.000 I'm ever so sorry, but I don't think this is not my cup of tea.
00:08:53.000 Anyway, I also said to my mate, Matt, this would be a good TV show, this, because this is like living a crazy life.
00:08:58.000 Let's get the cameras.
00:08:59.000 So we came back about a week later and filmed it.
00:09:01.000 And I goes, this would be a good concept for the old psychological jackass.
00:09:05.000 Like, you know, remember, like I told you last week, we all sleep with prostitutes, of course we do.
00:09:08.000 Why wouldn't we?
00:09:09.000 And by the way, people are sleeping with prostitutes.
00:09:11.000 There is a red light district, sex industry, pull it up on the internet.
00:09:14.000 People are doing this stuff.
00:09:16.000 And what I was trying to do was churn, and I'm still trying to do it in a way, is churn out unconscious material and make people address it.
00:09:23.000 Address who you are really.
00:09:23.000 Address it.
00:09:25.000 You know, that's why it's outrageous to be accused of things I've not done because the thing I've never been is dishonest.
00:09:29.000 I'm not really a dishonest person, except if I'm unconsciously dishonest, I suppose that can happen.
00:09:34.000 You know, like Joe, we did that work the other day, didn't mean I was dishonest about things just because I didn't recognise that I was being dishonest.
00:09:40.000 Anyway, so, so like, anyway, like, so we, um, the idea was get to know this lady that's a sex worker, instead of objectifying her, get to know her, and then at the end of the time, when you've got to know her and their little kid and all their desperate, terrible poverty, at the end of the spending a few days with them, go, here you go, then there's 100 quid, let's go have it off.
00:10:01.000 Now, it created a bit of an atmosphere when that happened because like, you know, we'd spent a couple of days together.
00:10:09.000 But the thing is, what was off camera is I was also a heroin addict.
00:10:12.000 So we were all doing, me and the prostitute, God, like, I can't remember her name, Karen, I think, I can't remember.
00:10:17.000 Anyways, me, the prostitute lady, and our fella that was pimping her, and the brother, they were all right, they were terrible people in a way, actually.
00:10:25.000 Thinking about it, there's one bit where he goes, like, everyone's getting pleased, we're getting pleased because we get the heroin, the punters are getting pleased because they're getting their sex, she's getting pleased.
00:10:36.000 And I remember as he did that list, I was thinking, she ain't getting pleased, she's being exploited, she's being exploited, this poor woman.
00:10:43.000 It ain't right.
00:10:44.000 Anyway, I don't think I've gone back to try to help her, as a matter of fact, and get her out of that terrible situation.
00:10:49.000 But I do try my best when I get the opportunity to help women that have fallen into those desperate and terrible situations.
00:10:55.000 Everyone's been upsex, we went back on the barge, is what we've done.
00:10:58.000 So I took them out for a day on the barge, and that's when I've done the final revelation of like, yeah, do you want to take this money for sex then?
00:11:05.000 Because now that we all know each other better, it created a very strange and terrible atmosphere.
00:11:08.000 And in the end, that one was never televised because it was deemed too, I think, distressing and not morally correct.
00:11:16.000 But some of the ones that were televised was me wanking off that fella that we now know is called Gary because we showed a clip of it in the last show.
00:11:23.000 You know, that one was deemed fine.
00:11:26.000 And some of the other ones were deemed fine.
00:11:28.000 You know, Mark Collette, that comes up in the Tommy Robinson.
00:11:31.000 Deemed fine.
00:11:32.000 All deemed fine.
00:11:33.000 But old Russ was on his way there, out of drugs, into recovery, and finally being saved by our Lord and Saviour Christ Jesus, the ever-present glorious God that can save even a broken person like me.
00:11:45.000 Thoughts?
00:11:45.000 What about locusts?
00:11:46.000 Questions?
00:11:47.000 Oh, the locusts.
00:11:48.000 I just would let them out loose.
00:11:50.000 I'd let them loose.
00:11:51.000 I'd bring in a box of locusts and I'd go, ah, behold.
00:11:56.000 And they'd probably be like, oh my God.
00:11:57.000 What's going on?
00:11:59.000 All locusts running around.
00:12:00.000 Blew people's minds, Massey.
00:12:02.000 People don't anticipate locusts when they've gone out for an evening's entertainment.
00:12:06.000 But they should, because that's what happened in the plague.
00:12:08.000 That's what happens with the Pharaoh.
00:12:10.000 He got him up in.
00:12:11.000 You did that to open their show.
00:12:13.000 That's right.
00:12:14.000 It didn't go well.
00:12:15.000 And the man had some complaints, but they'd given us some of the money up front.
00:12:19.000 So who's the real winner?
00:12:24.000 He was called Alki, the geezer wasn't.
00:12:26.000 Funny enough, and he actually was an Alki.
00:12:28.000 So we later met in a recovery setting, as I recall.
00:12:31.000 And he's like, mate, that's not what I paid you for.
00:12:33.000 Unleashing locusts on the unsuspecting audience.
00:12:36.000 I goes, hey, mate, I'm an artist.
00:12:37.000 I'm unpredictable.
00:12:38.000 You never know what I'll do.
00:12:40.000 What I might consider to be entertainment and you consider to be entertainment.
00:12:43.000 Subjective, innit?
00:12:44.000 Some people might want some well-crafted jokes.
00:12:47.000 Not me.
00:12:48.000 Locusts.
00:12:50.000 It's locusts for you, I'm afraid to say.
00:12:53.000 And there's plenty more.
00:12:54.000 What do you do for an encore?
00:12:55.000 Mosquitoes.
00:12:57.000 More creatures of the locus.
00:12:59.000 I didn't pay for a plague.
00:13:02.000 But you got one narytheless, poor fella.
00:13:05.000 Anyway, that's the way I lived in them days.
00:13:07.000 Yeah, I was cool.
00:13:09.000 I was an interesting young fella.
00:13:10.000 And then I was getting jobs on MTV and everything, so I had to rein it in a little bit because MTV were a bit more...
00:13:16.000 But I still did weird stuff, dressing up.
00:13:18.000 There's really funny things on the end.
00:13:19.000 They cracked me up, these things.
00:13:20.000 Like stuff on MTV of me all doled up, the weather cott, what do we call it?
00:13:24.000 The weather clerks.
00:13:25.000 Like me putting in these great big teeth like that.
00:13:28.000 Like walking around in Camden town.
00:13:30.000 This is our little son.
00:13:32.000 Like with a puppet that we claimed was our son that we'd beat up and think we set fire to it.
00:13:36.000 I mean it's really, we were like the geezer I was making was stuff with Matt.
00:13:40.000 He was also quite an avant-garde guy and we were hanging out with like them Camden people, Amy Winehouse, the Libertines, all that.
00:13:47.000 Everything was sort of like a bit on edge.
00:13:49.000 I was on crack and heroin.
00:13:50.000 I was making some unusual decisions as you've just heard.
00:13:54.000 But that's just what I think.
00:13:55.000 Let me know what you think in the comments and the chat.
00:13:57.000 If you don't have Rumble Premium yet, get Rumble Premium now.
00:13:59.000 Have you ever considered Polymarket?
00:14:01.000 Consider them now.
00:14:02.000 There they are.
00:14:03.000 Look at that other graph.
00:14:05.000 See?
00:14:05.000 Now then, here's a quick word from one of our partners.
00:14:08.000 We can't make this content without their support.
00:14:10.000 Here's a message from them now.
00:14:13.000 You don't have to overhaul your whole life in 2026.
00:14:16.000 Start with simple swaps like upgrading the snacks in your pantry to ones with real ingredients like Massa.
00:14:22.000 It's the easiest way to eat clean without feeling like you're on a diet.
00:14:26.000 You might want a little treat once in a while.
00:14:28.000 You can't live an austere life like John the Baptist in the woods just wearing leather and eating locusts and honey, though honey is quite nice.
00:14:35.000 Occasionally you might want a healthy snack.
00:14:37.000 But this is the Maha era.
00:14:39.000 You want to eat real food.
00:14:40.000 You don't want to eat 10 million ingredients or synthesize some stinking gloop that's going to poison you anyway.
00:14:45.000 Eat sensibly and enjoy these massa snacks.
00:14:48.000 Massa's chips contain just three ingredients.
00:14:51.000 Organic nyxmidalized corn, sea salt and 100% grass-fed beef tallow.
00:14:56.000 That's it.
00:14:56.000 No seed oils, no mystery chemicals.
00:14:59.000 Just real food.
00:15:00.000 These chips don't only avoid all the bad stuff.
00:15:02.000 They taste incredible too.
00:15:03.000 Oh my word, that's delicious.
00:15:05.000 There's a reason Sprouts Farmers Market picked them up nationwide.
00:15:09.000 This is the real deal.
00:15:10.000 Snacking on Massa chips is nothing like eating regular chips.
00:15:13.000 With Masa you feel satisfied, light and energetic with no crash, bloat or gross sluggish feeling afterwards.
00:15:18.000 And because these chips are made with real food, they're more satiating, so you won't find yourself uncontrollably binging and still feeling hungry afterwards.
00:15:24.000 Personally, my favourite flavour of Massa is blue.
00:15:28.000 Ready to give Massa a try?
00:15:29.000 Go to massachips.com.
00:15:31.000 Stay free and use the stay-free code to get 25% off your first order.
00:15:35.000 Simply click the link in the video description.
00:15:37.000 Try this, a delicious snack.
00:15:39.000 Use our code, makes us look good.
00:15:41.000 More people buy stuff using our code berries for us.
00:15:43.000 Do us a favor, William.
00:15:46.000 Welcome back and thanks for staying with us.
00:15:48.000 If you're watching this anywhere other than Rumble, watch us on Rumble.
00:15:51.000 I've always liked Shia LaBerth.
00:15:53.000 I even think I liked him a bit in them Transformer films.
00:15:56.000 But I like him even more now.
00:15:57.000 He's what I'd call a rampant Catholic.
00:16:00.000 Jake has brought the recent interview that Shia LeBerth done on his sort of New Orleans rampage to our attention.
00:16:08.000 What is it you like about this, mate?
00:16:10.000 I think there's familiarities between the two of you guys.
00:16:14.000 Certain things that are getting him excited that, you know, I've heard you get excited about.
00:16:18.000 I think it's just a similar person along the path of all of us.
00:16:22.000 Why are you thinking like he's interested in the mysterium tremendum, the great mystery, the tremendous mystery?
00:16:28.000 Like and also, I've always been arrested in New Orleans and I like him.
00:16:33.000 I chatted to him one time.
00:16:34.000 He's a good geezer.
00:16:35.000 I don't think he should drink probably.
00:16:38.000 That'll be my guess.
00:16:39.000 That's my guess.
00:16:40.000 But why don't we assess him?
00:16:41.000 We didn't crack on in a little while.
00:16:42.000 That's when me, Joe and Dave will be talking about our recovery.
00:16:45.000 We're abstinent from drugs and alcohol and all the things you've heard me say in the last few minutes.
00:16:49.000 This is me drug-free, man.
00:16:51.000 Crazy days.
00:16:52.000 23 years one day at a time.
00:16:54.000 Not as long as beloved Dave, but I wasn't as mentally ill as Dave, so I don't have the same concerns.
00:16:58.000 Let's have a look at Shia LaBerth, breaking down, talking about our Lord and Saviour Jesus.
00:17:03.000 These clips are chosen by Jake and we're going to have a chat about it to get back.
00:17:06.000 What would you say to Jesus if you could meet him?
00:17:08.000 I want to say shit.
00:17:11.000 Really?
00:17:12.000 Nah.
00:17:14.000 Bro, I kiss him.
00:17:18.000 I kiss him.
00:17:19.000 I kiss him.
00:17:20.000 I kiss his feet.
00:17:21.000 Don't want to say nothing Chill out with these questions, Andrew My bad I didn't know it was.
00:17:34.000 I was a real Catholic, bro.
00:17:35.000 A real one.
00:17:36.000 I just thought you had thought about it.
00:17:37.000 I'm a real one, bro.
00:17:39.000 I want to believe.
00:17:41.000 Well, hey, bro, you got to hit your head into the wall hard enough where you just go, f ⁇ it.
00:17:41.000 It's something.
00:17:47.000 It's the only way, though.
00:17:48.000 That's how you find God?
00:17:50.000 Yep, for me.
00:17:51.000 For the hard-headed ones?
00:17:53.000 Yeah, you got to go hard.
00:17:54.000 What do you think was the real-life equivalent of you smashing your head on a wall?
00:17:57.000 I put a gun in my mouth.
00:17:58.000 I was ready to kill myself.
00:17:59.000 I'd blow my brains out.
00:18:00.000 Writing letters.
00:18:01.000 What dark days?
00:18:02.000 For real, gone.
00:18:03.000 I'm ready to go.
00:18:05.000 Why didn't you do it?
00:18:06.000 Why didn't I do it?
00:18:07.000 Because I'm and also my mom.
00:18:09.000 So, God bless her.
00:18:11.000 She kept me alive that night.
00:18:12.000 That lad, he's not playing.
00:18:13.000 He's serious about the Lord, isn't he, Joe?
00:18:16.000 Yeah.
00:18:17.000 I can relate to him, mate.
00:18:18.000 He's a good fellow.
00:18:20.000 He's been in and out of recovery a long time.
00:18:21.000 So it's tough to see that, innit?
00:18:25.000 Yeah, he needs clear love, clear love.
00:18:28.000 How would you react to meeting Jesus?
00:18:31.000 I feel like I'm meeting Jesus now.
00:18:36.000 I feel like I'm in the throne room, not at the foot of the cross.
00:18:39.000 It came about a year in.
00:18:41.000 I started to feel we're in his throne room.
00:18:44.000 We're present with him.
00:18:44.000 We're in his throne room.
00:18:46.000 He's present with us.
00:18:47.000 And I remember I see that moment where he cried there.
00:18:50.000 I had a moment just before us lots started working together properly.
00:18:54.000 I was doing the shows out of Miami and Jordan Peterson came on into the Rumble studios down there that we were working out of.
00:19:01.000 And you have good chats with Jordan about Jesus.
00:19:05.000 And like I was thinking about the crucifixion and I got overwhelmed by the love of the crucifixion.
00:19:12.000 At the moment, I feel very held and at ease in him.
00:19:16.000 I guess it's by the fruits though, isn't it?
00:19:17.000 Like, you know, I just feel more chilled, Jake.
00:19:20.000 Yeah.
00:19:20.000 I feel more chilled.
00:19:22.000 And I like the overwhelm because I like the cup run of over moments that Shia LeBoe is having there.
00:19:28.000 He's a lovely, lovely geezer.
00:19:30.000 He should be around us is what I think.
00:19:32.000 Let's go grab him from New Orleans, drag him down here with us.
00:19:34.000 I know we need to.
00:19:35.000 I mean, the connection being in New Orleans and he's from Louisiana.
00:19:40.000 And I always found myself just almost like part of my life is supposed to partner with people like that.
00:19:47.000 Broken folks.
00:19:48.000 Well, it's just like creative, good at what they do, but genuine.
00:19:54.000 I do think he's genuine.
00:19:55.000 Why didn't do a Christian album with him?
00:19:57.000 Why don't you name him?
00:19:58.000 Do a Christian album.
00:20:03.000 Why don't you be in that bumblebee car he used to go about with singing Kumbaya?
00:20:08.000 A new thing in that bumblebee car.
00:20:10.000 Yeah, I transformed.
00:20:11.000 Kumbaya, my lordy, come by, come by.
00:20:15.000 Yeah.
00:20:17.000 I'm trying to be serious for you.
00:20:18.000 Well, I won't be serious.
00:20:20.000 I'd invite you.
00:20:22.000 I want to be in Bumblebee Car with you and Shriever.
00:20:26.000 Come to watch some more of him.
00:20:27.000 He's gorgeous.
00:20:27.000 I love him.
00:20:29.000 He's a lovely man.
00:20:31.000 Sorry.
00:20:32.000 Is this the one about breaks down his beef with Mike Piazza?
00:20:36.000 Yeah, so here's that.
00:20:37.000 Oh, yeah, what is that?
00:20:38.000 So another part that I think that you do such a good job of, and I'm around you to see it, is that you are always willing to take pictures with people.
00:20:48.000 And if, you know, if you're with your kids and you, or you got to go to the bathroom, I mean, I've seen that, but you do a very good job of making people feel valued, even when it's like a mass amount of people.
00:21:02.000 And I think he explains it pretty good, but his beefs with a guy who didn't do that well.
00:21:06.000 I said, look, I take a bunch of pictures like a f ⁇ ing, like I'm a golden retriever or a governor or something like that, because I like what it does for people's lives.
00:21:14.000 I remember trying to get Mike Piazza's autograph, mother.
00:21:17.000 You know what I mean?
00:21:18.000 For my whole life, Mike Piazza.
00:21:20.000 Were you waiting outside the fence?
00:21:21.000 Every day, this is Mike Piazza.
00:21:23.000 He's a catcher.
00:21:25.000 He was like, for us growing up, a really good baseball player.
00:21:28.000 What team?
00:21:29.000 He played for the Mets.
00:21:30.000 He played for.
00:21:31.000 Why'd you care about the catcher?
00:21:32.000 He's got that mask on.
00:21:33.000 He's sat there like a cockroach with that thing and he's tired.
00:21:35.000 Who cares about him?
00:21:36.000 That's important.
00:21:37.000 Just an iconic guy.
00:21:38.000 Like he's sort of that, like growing up, just the catcher you probably would.
00:21:43.000 Probably most famous catcher, I would think.
00:21:46.000 Yeah.
00:21:46.000 People like him.
00:21:47.000 The catcher.
00:21:47.000 Yeah.
00:21:48.000 I just don't think it's a glamorous position.
00:21:50.000 It can be.
00:21:51.000 It can be, but it's like the, you know.
00:21:52.000 Going like that.
00:21:54.000 But it's just the fact that that was important to him.
00:21:56.000 Like Mike Piazza, like him explaining the story.
00:21:58.000 It's just funny.
00:22:00.000 This guy, bro.
00:22:01.000 So, yeah, we used to go to Dodger games.
00:22:04.000 Big Brothers program used to give these tickets out.
00:22:06.000 You go Dodger game.
00:22:07.000 Me and all of them dudes would be sitting in the parking lot.
00:22:10.000 Brent Butler always signed.
00:22:11.000 Hideo Nomo always signed.
00:22:13.000 Mike Piazza.
00:22:14.000 Just a cold heart.
00:22:15.000 Mike Piazza, you're a bitch, bro.
00:22:21.000 Still holding on to that.
00:22:22.000 I just love that it goes to that.
00:22:24.000 You're a bitch, bro.
00:22:26.000 He's funny, isn't he?
00:22:27.000 He's funny.
00:22:30.000 How many times do you think he rejected signing up?
00:22:32.000 day, bro.
00:22:33.000 I did it for, I used to go out there 90 times probably.
00:22:36.000 Rejected me 90 times.
00:22:37.000 So what it did was, oh, I'm going to sign them all.
00:22:40.000 So when I got on, it was like, yo, f ⁇ Mike Piazza.
00:22:42.000 So you don't turn down any pictures.
00:22:44.000 Never.
00:22:45.000 Never, ever.
00:22:46.000 Not unless I'm with my kid or I'm eating some food or I'm chasing some ass because you feel what a guy.
00:22:55.000 What a guy.
00:22:55.000 Mike Piazza, you need to put this right.
00:22:57.000 Mike Piazza needs to send Shreya for autograph right now.
00:23:01.000 I'm chasing some ass because you feel like you're helping people, validating.
00:23:06.000 Yeah, what did God do it for?
00:23:07.000 Why did he do it for?
00:23:08.000 Why did he do this to me?
00:23:09.000 You know what I mean?
00:23:10.000 What is the purpose, bro?
00:23:12.000 I love him.
00:23:12.000 He's really adorable.
00:23:14.000 Let's have a look at this bit.
00:23:15.000 Now, why did you like this bit, Jake?
00:23:16.000 This is the G.K. Chesterton.
00:23:18.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:23:19.000 And you've, I mean, I feel like we've had this exact conversation.
00:23:23.000 Let's check it.
00:23:24.000 Can I read something to you?
00:23:25.000 Yeah.
00:23:28.000 You fuck with G.K. Chesterton?
00:23:30.000 I don't know who he is, but I sound like a guy.
00:23:31.000 So G.K. Chesterton, this is big OG stuff, yeah.
00:23:34.000 Very funny, isn't it?
00:23:35.000 Like, do you fuck with him?
00:23:37.000 Used to mean, have you read or heard of?
00:23:41.000 He's a real bandito in this thing.
00:23:43.000 Yeah, go go, do whatever you do, whatever you want.
00:23:45.000 In terms of this Christian shit, he's real bandito, this guy Chesterton.
00:23:49.000 Let me read this to you, yeah?
00:23:50.000 And it speaks to me.
00:23:51.000 Mysticism keeps men sane.
00:23:55.000 I'm not trying to be dramatic, yeah.
00:23:56.000 I heard some motherfuckers say I was performative today, you know, it bothered me.
00:23:59.000 Doesn't seem like it to me, man.
00:24:01.000 All right, here we go.
00:24:02.000 Mysticism keeps men sane.
00:24:04.000 As long as you have mystery, you have health.
00:24:06.000 When you destroy mystery, you create morbidity.
00:24:09.000 The ordinary man has always been sane because the ordinary man has always been a mystic.
00:24:15.000 He has permitted the twilight.
00:24:17.000 He has always had one foot in earth and the other in fairyland.
00:24:22.000 And I feel like that guy.
00:24:23.000 Like, I feel like I want to encourage the luminosity, bro.
00:24:27.000 I'm out here to fucking get it.
00:24:30.000 Oh, man.
00:24:31.000 He's lovely.
00:24:31.000 What a guy.
00:24:32.000 Like, the, yeah, I like that as well.
00:24:34.000 I like that Chester and quote, which I'd not heard before, saying that without the mystery, there's morbidity.
00:24:39.000 And indeed, much of the endeavor of recent creativity is around the remystification.
00:24:46.000 And I agree with that analysis that when you strip the mystery from us, that's bureaucracy.
00:24:53.000 That's that managerial optimization.
00:24:58.000 Everything can be managed.
00:24:59.000 We can live forever.
00:25:00.000 We can control it.
00:25:01.000 When you do that, you're sort of suddenly, you feel the fingers of death upon you.
00:25:05.000 He gets it to Shylock.
00:25:07.000 You shouldn't drink.
00:25:08.000 Do you think he's an alcoholic?
00:25:10.000 Yeah.
00:25:11.000 I mean, when I see Shyla Buff, I'm like, I get you.
00:25:14.000 Yeah, he's alcoholic.
00:25:15.000 Yeah, he is.
00:25:15.000 He talks about it.
00:25:16.000 He says, like, his journey of on and off of being in rehab.
00:25:20.000 I don't know if he's ever really gotten into the steps, though.
00:25:24.000 Come on, mate.
00:25:24.000 Come through the steps.
00:25:25.000 Come to the steps.
00:25:26.000 We need to.
00:25:27.000 Apparently, he was sponsoring people, right?
00:25:28.000 He was.
00:25:29.000 Yeah, he was full there.
00:25:31.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:25:32.000 Pretty interesting.
00:25:33.000 This is that thing, you know, that I heard quite early on.
00:25:36.000 Jesus Christ has taken out more men than Jim Beam.
00:25:38.000 If you get too much into that mystery and you ain't got your feet on the ground, serious trouble.
00:25:44.000 Serious trouble.
00:25:45.000 I mean, me, all the way through when I was clean and still sleeping around a lot, like that's that's not right.
00:25:51.000 That's not what you're meant to be doing.
00:25:52.000 You're meant to be engaging with, embodying the mystery and reaching the proper conclusion that there's no room for selfishness in any form.
00:26:01.000 See, that thing, Joe, that we were reading, that book we were reading in the UK, I keep blanking on the name of it.
00:26:05.000 But like it's sort of like that the reason like you shouldn't feel that you're grappling with alcohol or pornography because you should want to be with Christ.
00:26:14.000 And indeed actually that moment's probably quite telling that he, the idea of meeting Christ seemed abstract to him, even though he's obviously having a mysterious experience.
00:26:23.000 That's really clear.
00:26:24.000 You can see that too.
00:26:26.000 Because I liked what I read in that book where it said like that if you were you the reason you won't want to look at pornography is you're too busy being with Christ.
00:26:35.000 You're with Christ.
00:26:36.000 I haven't got time to stop being with Christ to get out a laptop or a phone and like sort of study a screen of naked women on it.
00:26:44.000 I'm busy.
00:26:45.000 I'm too busy.
00:26:46.000 I'm too busy being with God.
00:26:49.000 There's no like and when I think of the things, look at us, we're all sort of really broken addicts, like when you give up your connection to God for a biscuit.
00:26:57.000 Give up your connection to God to shout at your kids.
00:27:00.000 Give up your connection to God like I'm always giving up my connection to God for pretty low.
00:27:06.000 I would say what do you want to say?
00:27:08.000 Low yield fruit, low yield fruit.
00:27:11.000 So there you go.
00:27:12.000 There's Shala Boef.
00:27:13.000 What a guy let's have a look at like these.
00:27:14.000 Clearly, people are talking about Christ in new ways.
00:27:17.000 This is the right time for us to be participating in this revival.
00:27:20.000 It's not a coincidence.
00:27:21.000 God's using us, God's moving through us, even with the sort of decimatory and terrifying events in the Middle East and the concerns that we all have about, like the macro arguments around Epstein et al.
00:27:33.000 It's clear that Christ is returning.
00:27:35.000 What's this extraordinary story?
00:27:38.000 NASA discovery linked to Jesus' crucifixion reveals exact day Christ dies.
00:27:42.000 A discovery by NASA may confirm the biblical account of Jesus' crucifixion according to researchers from Oxford.
00:27:49.000 The Bible states that the sun turning into darkness and the moon into blood, which some scholars believe reference events following Christ's death, NASA's models, which trace the positions of the earth, moon and sun through history, show a lunar eclipse occurred on Friday, 3rd of April, 33 AD.
00:28:04.000 That gave me a feeling.
00:28:05.000 I had a feeling then the year traditionally linked to Jesus' death.
00:28:10.000 The cosmic event would have been visible in Jerusalem shortly after sunset and the position of the moon would have given it a reddish hue.
00:28:17.000 The biblical historians believe the lunar eclipse identified by NASA was the same as the one written about in the Bible.
00:28:24.000 The NASA discovery was made in the 90s, but it's now going viral on TikTok as today is known among Christians as the day Jesus was crucified.
00:28:32.000 Christian texts mention that the moon turned to blood after Jesus' crucifixion, potentially referring to a lunar eclipse during which the moon takes on a reddish hue, Nassau noted.
00:28:41.000 It's interesting, of course, when people find scientific precedent for biblical events, but apologists have long undertaken comparable arguments.
00:28:55.000 C.S. Lewis saying that many of Christ's miracles are amplifications of nature, which is what you would expect of the God of all nature, the creator of nature.
00:29:06.000 The obvious example that he uses, C.S. Lewis does, is the Christ calming the storm.
00:29:12.000 He says, all storms stop eventually, and you and I can calm a storm by simply closing a window.
00:29:18.000 So why would it confuse or concern you that a man who is also God can calm a storm in an instant?
00:29:25.000 Then C.S. Lewis goes on to say that some of the miracles have a different nature.
00:29:30.000 They seem to be outside, well he says outside of the natural purview, the obvious example being walking on water.
00:29:40.000 But it's my wife that said there are insects that do that.
00:29:43.000 There are insects that do that.
00:29:45.000 And even the resurrection itself, the sort of supreme and sublime event other than God coming here at all, is, could, well, there are turtles that hibernate for six months under frozen water, and, you know, that's all intense.
00:30:02.000 They're dead, aren't they?
00:30:03.000 I mean, then they come back.
00:30:05.000 So, the reason I mention all this is because the idea that we can put into scientific language the mysteries are indeed contrary and run contrary to Chesterton's point cited by Shire LeBoe there.
00:30:19.000 The mystery prevents us encountering morbidity.
00:30:22.000 When you strip away all the mystery of life, you're just left with this sort of dreadful, oh my god, I'm just here and I'm going to die and I might as well just go around and have sex and drink and do drugs.
00:30:32.000 What's the point?
00:30:33.000 Nothing means anything.
00:30:34.000 When you allow the mystery in, when you enter into a state of faith, it increases.
00:30:39.000 It increases a hundredfold, like all of his parables.
00:30:43.000 You know, you plant this, you're going to have your experience an increase.
00:30:47.000 You have to enter into the field of faith.
00:30:50.000 It's like a field of being.
00:30:52.000 Man, the thing that's been blowing my mind, I've been thinking about it a lot, is in my encounters with scripture, not only am I seeing a clear diagnosis of worldly institutions as fallen and evil, but he's talking continually about waves and particles and he's talking continually about the flow of consciousness or the living water.
00:31:10.000 So it operates for me on a plane that I know and recognize from long personal studies and readings about mystery and mysticism and encounters with psychedelic drugs.
00:31:22.000 All of these things are embedded in scripture and it's this Christ that I'm getting to know and it's this Christ that I think is under attack in a culture that's trying to, I think, demonize all of our institutions.
00:31:35.000 This is a story about a church in Southall London that's been burned to the ground.
00:31:40.000 Let me know in the comments and chat what you think about this peculiar new phenomena of burning down churches.
00:32:00.000 So weird that all this stuff's going on right now.
00:32:03.000 Also, this Ash Wednesday story of a child being told to wipe their cross off their forehead, which is of course an expression of the child's Catholic faith, is odd because you know that there's no way in the UK that a kid doing something that was an expression of their Muslim faith would be told, you know, get that off or put that on or whatever.
00:32:25.000 Check this out.
00:32:26.000 A teacher walked over and said, like, what is that?
00:32:30.000 And I was like, it's Ash Wednesday and I'm Catholic Swiss A1.
00:32:33.000 And he's like, no, it's inappropriate.
00:32:35.000 Go take it off.
00:32:36.000 His attempt to explain the mean of the symbol fell on deaf ears.
00:32:39.000 And she took me aside and she said, you have to take it off.
00:32:42.000 So she gave me a de-infection wipe, whatever they're called, and she made me wipe it off.
00:32:48.000 William says it happened as many of his classmates watched.
00:32:51.000 They saw a teacher wipe it off because they wiped it off in front of all my friends.
00:32:55.000 I felt like really bad.
00:32:57.000 The school's principal called Williams' grandmother as soon as she learned of the incident.
00:33:00.000 I was pretty upset.
00:33:01.000 The teacher also called.
00:33:02.000 And I asked her if she read the Constitution of the First Amendment and she said no.
00:33:07.000 And oh.
00:33:08.000 The David School District says what happened is not acceptable.
00:33:11.000 Why that even came up?
00:33:13.000 I have no idea.
00:33:14.000 It wants students of all faiths to feel welcomed.
00:33:17.000 When a student comes into school with ashes on their forehead, it's not something that we say, please take off.
00:33:24.000 That's interesting.
00:33:26.000 The world is in a moment of schism and fissure and breaking apart.
00:33:30.000 We need to look at our perspectives on religion generally and Christianity certainly with more depth because as our institutions collapse and are exposed for what they are, fallible and broken, where are we going to turn?
00:33:43.000 Are you going to lean into your political allegiances and your hobbies and your habits and your tribal traditions?
00:33:48.000 I've always liked this party or that party or this football team or that football team.
00:33:52.000 It's not going to be enough anymore.
00:33:54.000 It's a time really where we can all probably learn from Shia LeBoe, albeit he's a person that's clearly on the precipice of chaos and recognize that without the mystery we don't have much at all.
00:34:05.000 Nothing but Epstein falls and forever wars in the Middle East.
00:34:08.000 But that's just what I think.
00:34:09.000 Why don't you let me know what you think in the comments and the chat?
00:34:12.000 We can't make this content without the support of our partners.
00:34:14.000 Here's a message from one now.
00:34:16.000 Should we do Joe training?
00:34:18.000 Joe, that piss you off seeing that.
00:34:20.000 Oh shit, I didn't even turn to Joe.
00:34:22.000 Joe, be out of the way.
00:34:24.000 It's crazy, mate, isn't it?
00:34:25.000 It's evil, man.
00:34:27.000 And the ashes.
00:34:28.000 And the ashes.
00:34:28.000 It's terrible, mate.
00:34:31.000 What's going on in this world, mate?
00:34:32.000 It's fucking unbelievable.
00:34:35.000 It's annoyed to that, isn't it, mate?
00:34:37.000 Yeah.
00:34:37.000 You did.
00:34:38.000 Made him mad.
00:34:39.000 Joe, we've been talking for a while now about the phenomena of well, it's like these online sort of celebrity boxing matches at the upper echelons.
00:34:48.000 You've got Andrew Tate fighting someone, you know, or you've got Jake Paul having a row with almost everyone.
00:34:57.000 And now, though, there's a sort of real market.
00:34:59.000 Now, I know that you were particularly irked, Joe, when one of Rod Stewart's boys got in the ring with someone, and this has driven you to believe that you yourself should be in the prize fight in the online realm, isn't that right?
00:35:12.000 I believe so, mate.
00:35:13.000 Yeah, I'm not being funny.
00:35:14.000 I watched him, Rod Stewart's son.
00:35:16.000 He got sparked out in like, I don't know, less than two minutes.
00:35:19.000 And I just think, what the fuck is going on here?
00:35:21.000 People are paying to watch that.
00:35:23.000 Now, I weren't a great boxer, but I was alright.
00:35:26.000 Do you know what I mean?
00:35:27.000 And fuck me, if they can do it, I can do it.
00:35:29.000 And it seems like the only criteria is to get a few followers on Instagram.
00:35:32.000 So here I am.
00:35:33.000 I am following me on Instagram to make it happen.
00:35:36.000 Put it up on the screen now.
00:35:38.000 Get me on.
00:35:38.000 Let's do this.
00:35:39.000 Right, there's follow jokes.
00:35:40.000 We're going to try and get him in a row that he can win, get a few quid out of it.
00:35:44.000 Who do you want to fight?
00:35:45.000 I mean, is there a person?
00:35:46.000 I don't know yet.
00:35:47.000 Well, why don't you do some research?
00:35:49.000 We need to target someone to the right area.
00:35:52.000 Gabe Brazardo is fighting for their light heavyweight title.
00:35:57.000 I like him, I respect him.
00:35:58.000 He was a very good fighter in his day.
00:36:00.000 A very good fighter.
00:36:01.000 I would love to get in the ring with him.
00:36:03.000 I don't think I'm quite there yet.
00:36:04.000 I probably need a couple of little warm-up fights, get on the undercard of a few.
00:36:08.000 But I tell you what, I'd love it.
00:36:10.000 Get me in there with him.
00:36:11.000 You've done very good when we were out to end my plea in the UK the other week with them paparazzi.
00:36:16.000 Some of them got a little stiff arm.
00:36:18.000 Coach Carlos, my BJJ teacher said, I saw Joel getting in there, done some good work.
00:36:23.000 He looked good.
00:36:24.000 He looked cool too.
00:36:25.000 God, he looked cool.
00:36:26.000 Joe, you old man, little ramrod jabs to the chest.
00:36:31.000 They need them ramrods.
00:36:32.000 Well, here's Joe hitting the pads, getting ready.
00:36:35.000 If you know, let us know in the comments and chat some appropriate opponents.
00:36:38.000 And remember to follow Joe on Instagram.
00:36:40.000 There's his details.
00:36:41.000 And here he is, smashing it up in the gym.
00:36:50.000 Here we go.
00:36:51.000 You've got to look good now.
00:36:52.000 Yeah.
00:36:53.000 Yeah.
00:36:54.000 Just relax.
00:36:55.000 Yeah.
00:36:56.000 That's it.
00:36:57.000 One, two.
00:36:58.000 Yeah.
00:37:00.000 Double.
00:37:01.000 One, two, four.
00:37:03.000 Now we're going to go.
00:37:04.000 Body, head.
00:37:05.000 Yeah.
00:37:06.000 One, two, hook.
00:37:08.000 Good.
00:37:09.000 Again.
00:37:09.000 Yeah.
00:37:10.000 Once you hook.
00:37:13.000 Rear hand.
00:37:17.000 Double.
00:37:19.000 One, two.
00:37:20.000 One, two, hook, four, eight, two, hook, three hands, hook, three hands, double.
00:37:31.000 One, two.
00:37:32.000 Come back the backhand.
00:37:33.000 One, two.
00:37:36.000 Get in!
00:37:38.000 Jack!
00:37:40.000 One, two.
00:37:45.000 Looking tasty there, Joe.
00:37:46.000 He looks good, didn't he, Jake?
00:37:47.000 He looks really good.
00:37:49.000 Rocky one.
00:37:53.000 You look, I think that we should get you.
00:37:56.000 We'll get you about, by Jove.
00:37:59.000 We'll get you about.
00:38:00.000 Dave saying, what are you saying, Dave?
00:38:02.000 I was saying, hey, Russell will open for you and release some locusts.
00:38:08.000 He's my corner man.
00:38:09.000 I'll be corner man.
00:38:10.000 I'm going to open the show in the ring.
00:38:12.000 Welcome behold the great Joe McCann.
00:38:16.000 What's your fighting name?
00:38:16.000 What's your name?
00:38:18.000 Oh, I don't know.
00:38:19.000 We'll have to come up with one, won't we?
00:38:21.000 Yeah.
00:38:23.000 The last time I boxed, I called myself the Bourne Bull, being from Eastbourne, East Sussex.
00:38:27.000 Shout out Eastbourne.
00:38:28.000 Eastbourne Bourne Bull.
00:38:30.000 Oh.
00:38:30.000 Breadbasket.
00:38:31.000 I like that too.
00:38:32.000 The breadbasket.
00:38:36.000 I bet there's a Buddha somewhere that would fight him.
00:38:39.000 Of course there's a Buddhist.
00:38:40.000 Let's make this a holy war.
00:38:42.000 Let's put an Ash Wednesday cross on Joe's head.
00:38:44.000 Have it sort of scrubbed off by Larry Buddhist.
00:38:47.000 Gary the Crucible next to the Buddhist.
00:38:51.000 Gary the Buddhist.
00:38:52.000 All right, well, I mean, look, we've seen it before, but it bears repeating.
00:38:55.000 Here's me, like, with Tommy, Tommy, Tommy, Tommy, Robbies.
00:39:00.000 Are we really watching this again?
00:39:01.000 I mean, this is Gary the Buddhist.
00:39:05.000 I had a bath with a homeless guy, and I...
00:39:08.000 I think this was on the TV.
00:39:10.000 And I, like, I wanked off a geezer in a toilet.
00:39:13.000 What?
00:39:14.000 Yeah, tough times.
00:39:15.000 Tough times.
00:39:16.000 Where the fuck are you taking it?
00:39:17.000 It was at a time that Jackass was out.
00:39:19.000 You know that show?
00:39:20.000 Look at me sort of like really endeavoring to explain to Tommy how this happened.
00:39:24.000 What?
00:39:25.000 He's clearly not on board.
00:39:27.000 You know that show, Jackass?
00:39:28.000 I'll beat him.
00:39:29.000 I'll wank someone off in the toilet.
00:39:30.000 You think you're brave falling off a skateboard on a boiled egg?
00:39:33.000 I'll toss off this fella in the toilet.
00:39:35.000 Try that on for Sage Drew in Knoxville.
00:39:37.000 You wank it off.
00:39:38.000 Yeah, I did.
00:39:38.000 In a Soho toilet.
00:39:40.000 They're going to think you're trying to launch something.
00:39:42.000 Like, we keep talking about this story.
00:39:44.000 So, like, that's going to be your new channel.
00:39:46.000 New things wanking people off now.
00:39:48.000 That's going to be it.
00:39:49.000 There can be no more of those days that behind me.
00:39:52.000 But it was good content.
00:39:53.000 I mean, wait till you see him.
00:39:55.000 Yeah, I did.
00:39:55.000 In a Soho toilet.
00:39:57.000 Yeah, in a Soho toilet.
00:39:59.000 Yeah, crazy days.
00:40:01.000 Who did you wank off of the toilet?
00:40:02.000 I can't remember his name, mate.
00:40:03.000 Say the absolute truth.
00:40:04.000 It's really very, very funny, innit?
00:40:06.000 Like, the way he's looking at it, like, what?
00:40:08.000 His face is amazing.
00:40:10.000 He's really funny.
00:40:11.000 I can't remember his name, mate.
00:40:12.000 It's to the absolute truth.
00:40:13.000 But, like, he was a lovely fella.
00:40:14.000 I met him in a, like, what you see in front of Dean St. Looking to me.
00:40:18.000 He's like, he's like, you know what?
00:40:21.000 I think he thinks that he's like being punked.
00:40:23.000 Right.
00:40:25.000 I think he's like, surely this, you're not just telling me that.
00:40:28.000 Not every net.
00:40:29.000 I mean, like, what you see in Fran Dean Street.
00:40:33.000 Are you serious?
00:40:33.000 Yeah.
00:40:33.000 What you just?
00:40:34.000 I was just going like, like, yeah, he's telling the truth.
00:40:38.000 I've heard the story before.
00:40:40.000 It's real.
00:40:43.000 It was like in them gay bars around Dean Street.
00:40:46.000 It's on the television.
00:40:47.000 You wanking off a bloke, don't you?
00:40:49.000 Hey, I'm Russell.
00:40:50.000 I'm on my way now.
00:40:52.000 Solo, also known as Gayo Stiffcock in my hand, the Stiff Baney cock.
00:40:59.000 I mean, I'm leaning into it there, wouldn't I?
00:41:01.000 The young Russ.
00:41:03.000 Cock and wank it into the orgasms.
00:41:06.000 Wank a man cock into orgasms if that makes me gay.
00:41:09.000 Right, okay then, Gary.
00:41:12.000 No.
00:41:16.000 Gary's the perfect name for it.
00:41:19.000 The bit people carry through, he says, like, he's here to help.
00:41:22.000 Like, just let, like, Gary, what a truth.
00:41:25.000 Oh, my God.
00:41:26.000 What the world actually is.
00:41:29.000 What are people.
00:41:33.000 I get the first bit of tissue.
00:41:36.000 I can never again say that I've never wanked off a man in a toilet.
00:41:40.000 Gary, Jesus Christ, nice working with you, man.
00:41:42.000 Nice.
00:41:43.000 I mean, I. I'm happy you should help.
00:41:44.000 I'm happy to see you.
00:41:45.000 Thank you for the Buddhists.
00:41:46.000 You're a Buddhist.
00:41:46.000 I help her.
00:41:47.000 I can.
00:41:47.000 Who used to be pretty OG?
00:41:49.000 I'll help her I can.
00:41:51.000 Yeah, I even mentioned the name of our Holy Father.
00:41:53.000 He was there with me.
00:41:54.000 Jesus protecting me.
00:41:57.000 Dave's face.
00:42:01.000 Oh, dear Lord.
00:42:03.000 What was I doing?
00:42:03.000 I was a crazy person.
00:42:04.000 I can't believe people hate Tommy when you see him laughing that much about something.
00:42:07.000 He seems like such a nice guy.
00:42:09.000 People are like Satan, you know.
00:42:09.000 He's awesome.
00:42:12.000 He's quite sweet, isn't he?
00:42:14.000 He's great.
00:42:14.000 I think that's part of it.
00:42:15.000 Like, if you would meet people and have conversations with them.
00:42:18.000 Yeah.
00:42:19.000 I think a lot of this, even people that we might say, they're probably nuts.
00:42:22.000 I'm going to sit down and have a conversation with them.
00:42:24.000 Yeah, just meet people.
00:42:26.000 Massive meet people.
00:42:28.000 Wank them off.
00:42:29.000 You just come here.
00:42:30.000 You're not so different are you?
00:42:31.000 They're all really nice when you wanked them off.
00:42:33.000 Come in here, Kier Starmer.
00:42:35.000 Wank him off.
00:42:36.000 He'd like it.
00:42:37.000 Come in here, Assad.
00:42:38.000 Wank him off.
00:42:39.000 Come over here, Ayatollah.
00:42:41.000 Wank him off.
00:42:42.000 Wank our way to peace.
00:42:45.000 Who used to be pretty pro-LGBTQ?
00:42:48.000 I'm, yeah.
00:42:49.000 You was back in Dan?
00:42:50.000 Yeah.
00:42:50.000 He was in that circle movie.
00:42:52.000 This is what I mean, using that sort of side of the, what I'd say is the wrong side.
00:42:56.000 All right, hold on.
00:42:57.000 Let's get this straight.
00:42:58.000 Let's get this straight.
00:42:59.000 You wanked off a bloke in the toilet.
00:43:00.000 The video's out there.
00:43:01.000 I can't deny that.
00:43:03.000 You can't calf straight in the same sentences as I.
00:43:04.000 I just wanked off a man in the toilet.
00:43:06.000 That's fair enough.
00:43:06.000 But I was very, very promiscuous.
00:43:09.000 What the fuck?
00:43:09.000 But how long.
00:43:10.000 How hold on?
00:43:10.000 How old were you when you wanked off a man in the toilet?
00:43:13.000 25.
00:43:15.000 Oh, when you were a junkie?
00:43:16.000 Yeah, I was a junkie.
00:43:18.000 So that's what prostitute yourself.
00:43:19.000 I suppose so.
00:43:20.000 He's swift intense, isn't he?
00:43:21.000 Oh, when you junkie junkie.
00:43:24.000 Yeah.
00:43:25.000 I love back to business.
00:43:27.000 Prostitute yourself.
00:43:28.000 suppose so but in the same Hold on a minute.
00:43:32.000 Do you want to hear in the toilet shower?
00:43:41.000 Tommy, you've got a bit caught up on this.
00:43:43.000 I'm caught up in it.
00:43:43.000 I wasn't expecting it.
00:43:44.000 Do you think she was being exploited for the show?
00:43:46.000 Yes, absolutely.
00:43:47.000 You were being exploited?
00:43:48.000 In a way, but.
00:43:48.000 Well, you've been exploited if they're getting your wang man off.
00:43:50.000 Come on.
00:43:50.000 Well, in a way, Tommy, at that point, we're saving.
00:43:54.000 I know, let go of it.
00:43:55.000 You're tweeting it when I walk out of here.
00:43:56.000 Don't, mate.
00:43:58.000 I'm only playing.
00:44:00.000 Whenever I've been around what I would call top-tier famous people, some of them, like the most famous people in the world, I've always felt that they were a bit like, well, this geezer is a loose cannon.
00:44:09.000 Can you see?
00:44:10.000 Can you tell that I'm basically quite an open person?
00:44:12.000 That if you ask me a question, I'll try and tell you the truth.
00:44:14.000 Mate, you just told me you wanked.
00:44:15.000 I didn't even ask you, Tommy, you wank someone off in the street.
00:44:17.000 Just pull that up off the top of the head.
00:44:19.000 My favourite bit.
00:44:20.000 That's my favourite bit.
00:44:21.000 I didn't even ask you, Tommy Wanked.
00:44:24.000 I didn't even ask you.
00:44:27.000 That in the context, when you're like, they need to know the context.
00:44:31.000 Get a context.
00:44:32.000 Well, the context was that it was a difficult thing to do.
00:44:35.000 The context weren't, I'm doing stuff that's a laugh, slice of pizza, pint of beer, wank a geezer off.
00:44:41.000 The point of it was doing things that are difficult to do to challenge yourself psychologically.
00:44:46.000 In some ways, I'm a pioneer, a great artist.
00:44:49.000 Here we are, lauding that fella that dressed up as Jim Carey when there's genuine artists, true heroes, like old Russ, pushing the boundaries, pulling the plonkers, spilling the grey jizman.
00:45:01.000 It was a nasty, nasty, nasty time in a way.
00:45:04.000 It weren't right.
00:45:05.000 I was lost in sin.
00:45:07.000 And I thank Tommy Robinson for bringing it back to the forefront in my mind.
00:45:10.000 I can't really remember why I even bought that up.
00:45:14.000 We were talking about Islam just before.
00:45:17.000 Funny.
00:45:18.000 It comes out at random times.
00:45:21.000 It comes out.
00:45:22.000 You never know when it's going to come out.
00:45:23.000 You're bringing it back up the way Tommy Watts just keeps coming back to you.
00:45:26.000 It is.
00:45:29.000 Tommy has great facial expressions.
00:45:31.000 Like those like, like those little like, you know, looking at the camera.
00:45:35.000 That was good.
00:45:36.000 Oh.
00:45:37.000 It's a really lovely little moment.
00:45:40.000 Hey, listen, we've been doing this.
00:45:41.000 Oh, no, it's probably not 53 minutes.
00:45:42.000 We better do crack on.
00:45:43.000 Let's do crack on.
00:45:45.000 Let's do crack on.
00:45:47.000 As you know, we're men in recovery, and you can see why.
00:45:50.000 Having had a little glimpse at my past time now for our recovery podcast, Crack On with Dave, Joe and Russell.
00:46:00.000 This podcast is not allied with nor endorsed by any particular 12-step fellowship.
00:46:05.000 Although we may reference their literature, we do not represent these organisations.
00:46:10.000 The primary purpose of this podcast is to provide additional support to men and women who walk the path of recovery.
00:46:16.000 We share our personal experience of the 12 steps in the hope that others can benefit.
00:46:21.000 Take what is useful, disregard what isn't.
00:46:24.000 Apologies in advance for any offence caused.
00:46:26.000 Any other problems, take to your God and your sponsor.
00:46:31.000 Thanks very much, Joe.
00:46:32.000 I see we're going to be talking about the phenomenon of craving.
00:46:38.000 I read that.
00:46:39.000 Dave, can you see that, Dave, if we put it up?
00:46:41.000 Yep.
00:46:42.000 Can you read it?
00:46:43.000 Yeah, go ahead, Dave.
00:46:44.000 We believe, and so suggested a few years ago, that the action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy.
00:46:51.000 That the phenomenon of craving is limited to this class and never occurs in the average temperate drinker.
00:46:57.000 These allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all.
00:47:02.000 And once having formed the habit and found they cannot break it, once having lost their self-confidence, their reliance upon things, humans, their problems pile up on them and become astonishingly difficult to solve.
00:47:15.000 Frothy emotional pill seldom suffices.
00:47:18.000 The message which can interest and hold these alcoholic people must have depth and weight.
00:47:24.000 In nearly all cases, their ideals must be grounded in a power greater than themselves if they are to recreate their lives.
00:47:30.000 Why'd you choose that reading from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous, Joe?
00:47:36.000 I chose it because like this week I've been thinking on like various forms of addiction, right?
00:47:43.000 Like food addictions and stuff like that.
00:47:46.000 Now all 12-step fellowships come from Alcoholics Anonymous and this is like a fundamental part in step one in it.
00:47:54.000 Acknowledging that it's the manifestation of some sort of allergy and like it's mad in it like how's that relevant to food if you're a food addict and I've got fucking terrible problems with food at the minute.
00:48:06.000 Like I'm putting it now in the bracket of this is an addiction.
00:48:10.000 I'm like carb addicted like anything with wheat, gluten, that sort of shit, it will trigger the allergy.
00:48:16.000 It will set me into a spree and eventually I'll end up binging on chocolate, ice cream, all sorts of shit.
00:48:22.000 Now I know that sounds a little bit mental and like that's not that bad, but for me, look fucking hell, I wouldn't be on here if I didn't have severe mental health problems.
00:48:29.000 You know what I mean now.
00:48:30.000 When I binge on sugar, chocolate and all that shit, I'll be up.
00:48:35.000 You know I won't sleep right, I won't get good quality sleep and the next day quite often suffer with like suicidal ideation and really fucked up thinking.
00:48:43.000 So for me I've been able to put it in a step one context of like I have no mental defense against it and when I start I can't stop.
00:48:52.000 So is this the manifestation of an allergy?
00:48:55.000 I mean, I guess it must be.
00:48:57.000 Really it doesn't do that to normal people, normal people.
00:49:00.000 I watch normal people in the same way I'd watch a normal person have one beer or two beers and say I've had enough.
00:49:06.000 I fucking watch people eating chocolate and I think how can you just have a little bit and then leave it there?
00:49:11.000 I notice it.
00:49:12.000 I'll notice all the chocolate left or bread and all that stuff and I think how can you restrain yourself not fucking eating a whole lot?
00:49:20.000 You know anyway, I need a meeting in a minute.
00:49:23.000 That's why I wanted to talk about it, because I'm thinking about going to a 12-step fellowship for food, eating plans and all that.
00:49:29.000 Well, I did hear that the therapeutic value of one addict talking to another can't be equaled.
00:49:37.000 That if you have very specific problems around gambling or sex or food, that you should do what?
00:49:43.000 What many of us have done with drugs and alcohol and seek out the identification, the identification, the specific identification.
00:49:51.000 But when I listen to you it reminds me of two things.
00:49:54.000 One, i've got a concern when people use pseudo-scientific language like allergy, at a point in where they probably couldn't chemically demonstrate that allergy and I don't think allergy is quite the right word because I can't think of another allergy like allergy.
00:50:12.000 What are the symptoms of allergy in general?
00:50:14.000 A skin condition like swelling, sort of stuff that's connected to histor histamine yeah, and like.
00:50:21.000 So allergies are sort of it's.
00:50:23.000 It's a metaphor right, allergy is a metaphorical piece of language, but it's pseudo-scientific and it occurs in a part in a big book that is somewhat scientific.
00:50:31.000 At least it's a medical practitioner that, a doctor, dr Silkworth, that's written that chapter and is making them kind of observations.
00:50:40.000 So that's my first thing is, is it really an allergy?
00:50:43.000 Is that the right word.
00:50:45.000 And the second thing is that when I listen to anyone talk about addiction at length the, it collapses now for me into the idea of sin being out of the right state of mind and that the great genius of the Alcoholics Anonymous program in particular, coming as it did out of the Oxford Group, was they recognized that first century Christianity.
00:51:08.000 As you know, the principles of the Oxford Group were insufficient, somehow for what they needed to do, like they needed to focus specifically on Alcohol dependency.
00:51:20.000 They couldn't just by attending essentially a church group remedy the problem of their alcoholism.
00:51:26.000 Dave, what do you think about these two components?
00:51:28.000 One, the use of the term allergy, and two, the idea that even though what Alcoholics Anonymous and all of the anonymous programs point to is the spiritual malady, the idea that we're trying to address some sort of spiritual deficit through an action, a behavior, consuming chemicals.
00:51:46.000 You know, what do you think about the breadth of that analysis?
00:51:50.000 So the allergy idea and whether or not the disease is the same thing, no matter what you're holicking, whether it's chocolate or booze or you know, porn or whatever.
00:52:01.000 Yeah, well, first part, the allergic reaction, I think of it as it's an abnormal reaction, right?
00:52:10.000 Like an allergy is an abnormal reaction.
00:52:13.000 Okay, that's good.
00:52:15.000 So when other people, if you're allergic to penicillin or something like that, it's like when you normal people that take it, normal in regards to penicillin, they take it, don't have a reaction.
00:52:28.000 Some people have an abnormal reaction.
00:52:30.000 And so like with other people, Joe, I think you see them and you go, man, they eat some cake or they eat some bread and they put it down.
00:52:41.000 They have enough.
00:52:42.000 They're like, okay, this is, you know, a normal amount of bread to eat or whatever, or some cake.
00:52:49.000 And then you go, how can that happen?
00:52:50.000 Because I have to go through a spree.
00:52:53.000 And it's like, it's like in that same chapter where it's like, emerging remorseful, we go through a spree, emerging remorseful, firm resolution not to drink again.
00:53:04.000 And then the mental obsession kicks in.
00:53:07.000 I do think we, so there's the mental obsession, so the mental part that says, hey, I won't once, like, I know I can't do it, so I'm not going to do it.
00:53:18.000 And yet, I cannot keep that decision not to do it.
00:53:22.000 Like, I can keep it for a time, then all of a sudden have what they call a strange mental blank spot, and then I do it.
00:53:30.000 But then there's the physical part that says, once I do it, then I go through a spree.
00:53:34.000 Like, I can't stop doing it.
00:53:37.000 And then, but I think the third part of it, if you're a three-pronged disease guy, you'll say the third part is the spiritual malady.
00:53:46.000 And I think that's the real part.
00:53:47.000 I mean, when we straighten out spiritually, we straighten out mentally and physically.
00:53:50.000 That's the promise in the big book.
00:53:54.000 I do agree with that.
00:53:55.000 I do think there is some, even with certain drugs, you know, the difference between heroin and alcohol, you know, there's specifics with it that it helps relating.
00:54:09.000 I don't know about needing to go to a different fellowship.
00:54:13.000 Maybe, maybe so.
00:54:14.000 And I know, especially with like food or sex or something like that, there's probably some specifics because you got to keep eating.
00:54:22.000 You know, you have to eat.
00:54:24.000 And it's something, it's like, I don't ever have to take alcohol ever.
00:54:30.000 So that's off the table.
00:54:31.000 Or I don't know.
00:54:33.000 I do think that – I know it's a spiritual – we all know the spiritual answer, you know.
00:54:33.000 I don't know.
00:54:41.000 It's not a – but would it help go into like a Overeaters Anonymous or like the specific like food addicts type group?
00:54:52.000 I don't know.
00:54:53.000 The reason where I think, before you go, Joe, right, the thing I feel that is a step three issue, not a step one issue.
00:55:01.000 Check this.
00:55:02.000 Is it look, we're powerless over bread cakes, drugs, alcohol, or is it when we make a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, right?
00:55:11.000 That means if my, what I like it is this, is that I don't have the personal authority anymore to decide whether or not I drink.
00:55:20.000 That authority is gone.
00:55:22.000 I've been told, you don't drink.
00:55:24.000 Okay, no problem.
00:55:25.000 So like whatever happens, I don't drink.
00:55:27.000 If someone says to me, then the step three of this is applicable.
00:55:31.000 Now, of course, you won't take step three if you haven't taken step one and two, you know, admitted there's a problem, believe that the problem can be solved, put quickly and simply.
00:55:39.000 So like this, but the step three when it comes to food, if someone says to you, you should eat these foods at these times in this way, the end.
00:55:49.000 If you then don't do that, you've like took your will back.
00:55:53.000 Now, someone could say it's a step one problem because you're not admitting your powerlessness.
00:55:57.000 But for the step one, you've got to get into chemistry and all sorts of weird pseudo-scientific territory.
00:56:04.000 Step three is explicitly spiritual and is about self and will and is multivalent in its application.
00:56:13.000 I.e., if someone says, don't drive that car, no problem, I don't drive that car.
00:56:19.000 Like, don't eat that food.
00:56:20.000 Okay, I don't know.
00:56:21.000 Don't drink that.
00:56:22.000 Don't watch pornography.
00:56:24.000 It's completely applicable.
00:56:25.000 Now, as we always say, I suppose with the behavioral addictions, one should, could have a healthy sex life.
00:56:33.000 You know, as Christians, we'd bring in, you know, in a marriage.
00:56:37.000 But it's, and the same with food, you should eat healthy food.
00:56:42.000 You can't not, you know, it's just, it's like, to us, it seems to me that in general, the option of down in a bar of delicious, lovely Tony's chocolate that's been kept all nice and cold in the fridge or, you know, like really good sourdough bread or buttered up with L Kerrygold.
00:57:00.000 Some of Joe's shares on food really cracked me up because Joe's done things like found himself in car parks, parking lots, eating sourdough and butter and using his teeth to spread the Kerrygold butter on like his own teeth or a knife.
00:57:15.000 So Joe gets desperate with like bread and butter.
00:57:19.000 With bread and butter.
00:57:21.000 But what do you think about it being a step three thing rather than a step one thing, Joe?
00:57:26.000 Yeah, that's the solution, right?
00:57:28.000 I understand that for sure.
00:57:30.000 But like the difficult thing with this, yeah, is like I'm putting it in the bracket of step one because I feel like certain foods can trigger that allergy.
00:57:42.000 I believe it to be an allergy.
00:57:44.000 Like if it's an abnormal reaction to have something that you can't satisfy the craving for, like any normal craving, I crave a fucking, I don't know, I crave a green tea.
00:57:56.000 Yeah.
00:57:56.000 I have a craving for it.
00:57:58.000 I have the green tea, craving satisfied.
00:58:01.000 Right?
00:58:03.000 It's an abnormal reaction because when I have a bit of bread, I crave more bread and more bread and more bread.
00:58:08.000 Then a fucking pizza.
00:58:09.000 And then the next day I'm binging on chocolate, binging on it.
00:58:12.000 Like I cannot stop and I don't want to be doing it.
00:58:16.000 So it's like I'm doing it against my own will.
00:58:18.000 That's how I've experienced it to feel like an allergic reaction.
00:58:23.000 The same way my drinking felt like an allergic reaction in the end because I didn't want to be doing it.
00:58:27.000 I was going to 12-step meetings.
00:58:29.000 I didn't want to drink.
00:58:30.000 I didn't have the mental defense to stop me drinking.
00:58:33.000 And when I started, I remember fucking feeling like I couldn't satisfy this craving.
00:58:39.000 It was like a fucking demon taking me for a joyride and it lasted days.
00:58:44.000 Now, the solution is the same, right?
00:58:47.000 But the mental obsession is always going to be there around certain types of food.
00:58:51.000 Maybe you can have that or maybe you can have that.
00:58:54.000 So like I think it's right what you're saying.
00:58:58.000 The answer is to completely surrender of self-will in this area.
00:59:02.000 But what does that look like?
00:59:04.000 And I feel like, you know, I probably need to speak to some people that have the same problem.
00:59:09.000 I spoke to my mate Stu today and he said, look, you know, I'm on a WhatsApp group, right?
00:59:14.000 Where you post your days of how many days you clean the sugar.
00:59:17.000 So it's just a reminder.
00:59:18.000 I'm powerless over it.
00:59:19.000 I can't have it.
00:59:20.000 And I've been alright with that.
00:59:21.000 I've got like 30, I think I got to 35 days without any refined sugar.
00:59:26.000 And it was Brussels.
00:59:26.000 It was when I had that naan bread at yours and we had that curry, right?
00:59:29.000 That's what started it.
00:59:30.000 When I got back here Sunday, I ordered a pizza and a garlic bread, the balsamic glaze on the pizza.
00:59:34.000 And it was late at night.
00:59:35.000 The next day, it was just an all-out spree of eating chocolate and all sorts of shit.
00:59:40.000 But what I'm saying is where I feel like I need unique support in this area is like I've been told try having a little tangerine, tactical tangerine they call it on this WhatsApp group.
00:59:53.000 For me that's tactical tangerines, right?
00:59:57.000 Now, fucking hell, man.
00:59:59.000 Even something sweet, I think that could go either way.
01:00:03.000 I might be all right.
01:00:03.000 I might not.
01:00:04.000 I might be down the chop, down the shop, racking up fucking bars of tonies and eating them off the dashboard in the car at midnight.
01:00:13.000 That's what happens.
01:00:16.000 You can't go there.
01:00:18.000 If you had a, I have two questions, really.
01:00:21.000 If you had a sponsor in this that said, here's what you eat, here's what you can't eat, these are your, and then you had a support group around it that's like, hey, these, you know, this is how long you've been clean and sober.
01:00:36.000 No little bit here, a little bit there.
01:00:39.000 It's really clear for you to say, okay, if I eat this, this, this, that means it's a relapse.
01:00:45.000 Yeah.
01:00:45.000 You know, if it was like really clear, because it's somewhat not completely clear of what you can, what you can't.
01:00:53.000 If that was super clear for you, do you think that would be super helpful?
01:00:58.000 I think so.
01:01:00.000 I do think so.
01:01:01.000 Because it's look, it's a normal thing to eat, right?
01:01:03.000 In the same way, like when you stop drinking and taking drugs, it can be like a bit tricky meeting friends in social settings where there's alcohol and that because they don't understand.
01:01:14.000 They'll still offer you a beer or offer you a line or whatever, whatever your thing is.
01:01:18.000 Do you know what I mean?
01:01:19.000 And to them, it's normal still, you know, like to be able to take yourself off and ring someone and say, the fucking pop-a-doms look good or that naan bread's looking good.
01:01:28.000 It's on me and I don't know if I'm going to do it.
01:01:29.000 I need to be reminded.
01:01:30.000 You eat that, you could set off the, you know, the beginning of a spree and who knows where it ends.
01:01:36.000 Now, like I say, for me, it ends in like suicidal ideation.