Tate Speech


BUGATTI CHIRON VS TRICYCLE | Tate Confidential Ep.148


Summary

Tristan and Luke are drinking a lot of water, but it's not enough to keep them hydrated. They need elite level hydration, and the only way to achieve that is to drink lots of sparkling water. But how much sparkling water should they drink? And how much water does it take to be an elite hydration? And what are the best way to drink it? And why does it matter if you drink it in a glass or out of a glass? This episode is all about how to drink enough water to become an expert hydration drinker, and how to make sure you don't get sick of it all. Featuring music by Ian Dorsch and Jeff Kaale. Additional music by Chris Brown. This episode was produced and edited by David Fincher and Alex Blumberg. It was mixed by Matthew Boll and Matthew Boll. Special thanks to Rachel Ward. Please rate, review, and subscribe to the podcast if you enjoyed this episode and/or have any suggestions for future episodes. Thank you for supporting the podcast. The opinions expressed in the podcast are our own, not those of our sponsors. We do not own the rights to any of the music used in this episode. If you enjoyed it, please leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts. and a review on iTunes. Thanks for listening and reviewing! if you have a question or suggestion for our next episode, we'll be looking out for us to send us a review and we'll get a shoutout. in the next episode of the next week's episode. Thank you'll be the first to know we'll hear about it on the podcast next week. -- Thank you! <3 and we really appreciate it. XOXOXOXO -- -- P.S. - P.A. - Thank you -- XOXO -- XO XO, xO and & Thankyou, -- A.B. & K. & B.E. & A. (A.M. & E. ( ) . (M. ( ) ( ) & P. (P. (C. (A) (S. (B. A) ) & (C.) (B). (R. (D. (F) & B)


Transcript

00:00:01.000 Hmm, Tristan got slowed down by the ball.
00:00:05.000 They got you, Tristan.
00:00:06.000 Ah, so you touch kids.
00:00:10.000 Literally saw it, caught red-handed.
00:00:12.000 Good song and routine!
00:00:14.000 Good song and routine!
00:00:25.000 I think I'm gonna take that.
00:00:31.000 Good song and routine!
00:00:33.000 Good song and routine!
00:00:39.000 And then can I also have 20 bottles of sparkling water?
00:00:57.000 The big ones. The big ones.
00:01:03.000 Yes, 20-0 bottles of sparkling water.
00:01:08.000 Elite level hydration.
00:01:11.000 Sorry? Yes, the big bottles.
00:01:15.000 20-0 of them.
00:01:17.000 Cold. Yes, the large sparkling waters and cold, please.
00:01:21.000 And ice. And ice, please.
00:01:24.000 And lemons. And yes, that's all.
00:01:33.000 Yes, sounds perfect.
00:01:35.000 Thank you very much. So, I didn't do this to us.
00:01:44.000 I wanted the ribeyes.
00:01:46.000 I wanted one ribeye.
00:01:48.000 We need elite level hydration, Luke.
00:01:50.000 This doesn't make sense. Look, what is the number one thing humans need to stay alive?
00:01:56.000 Tristan says we're not drinking enough.
00:01:58.000 We're not having enough fun.
00:01:59.000 So they are gonna drink all day.
00:02:02.000 All day. 20, 20?
00:02:05.000 Is that 20 liters? How much are these bauberts?
00:02:08.000 I think they're a liter and a half.
00:02:10.000 30 liters. Nice.
00:02:12.000 What are they, one and a half? So 10 liters each of water.
00:02:16.000 As a star. As a star.
00:02:18.000 What do you mean, as a star? We're drinking all day.
00:02:22.000 All day long. You can't go outside because the peasants are waiting for us.
00:02:26.000 The seniors are all along.
00:02:30.000 People would like to say, hey, what do you know when you're worth a hundred million dollars?
00:02:33.000 Water contest.
00:02:35.000 Elite level hydration.
00:02:37.000 Done. You also bought the course.
00:02:43.000 Course bought. Perfect.
00:02:46.000 Now we have the secret to elite level hydration.
00:02:49.000 The loop does.
00:02:50.000 The only way to achieve elite level hydration...
00:02:54.000 Tristan! That can't be in the course!
00:03:02.000 Is that a part?
00:03:03.000 This can't be a part.
00:03:05.000 This must be part eight. Elite level.
00:03:07.000 This actually might be elite level.
00:03:09.000 This might be truly elite.
00:03:12.000 I'll drink more water than both of you.
00:03:13.000 You won't. No, you won't.
00:03:16.000 I'll destroy you by the time. You won't.
00:03:18.000 We'll see. We will see.
00:03:22.000 Nah, I'm just going to edit out every single time he drinks water.
00:03:26.000 Teach him a lesson. That's not how you win.
00:03:28.000 Could be. Take confidential.
00:03:30.000 Wouldn't know if I did or did not do that.
00:03:32.000 Just admit. Maybe I cut this out too.
00:03:36.000 So Triss is going the barbarian tactic.
00:03:38.000 I don't think I can do barbarian.
00:03:40.000 Why have you made it bubbly? You made it super hard.
00:03:41.000 Yeah, it's like all bubbles. If he's doing the barbarian tactic.
00:03:44.000 But I believe civilization will defeat the barbarians if I just always drink it out of a nice glass.
00:03:50.000 You guys are drinking it out of a bottle.
00:03:51.000 If I just drink it always out of a glass.
00:03:55.000 There's no way you're beating me. Nice and refreshing.
00:04:03.000 And I'm just going to make sure this never, ever is empty.
00:04:07.000 Like the infinite glass.
00:04:08.000 Isn't there a legend about some infinite glass that never runs out?
00:04:11.000 You can't defeat me. What is boozing, Dave?
00:04:16.000 Tristan can drink liquids so fast.
00:04:18.000 He can! Tactics are poor.
00:04:23.000 See why I did that? That is his tactic!
00:04:26.000 This is going to work. There's a reason cups were invented.
00:04:28.000 Why would cups be invented if this is not the most ideal way to hydrate?
00:04:32.000 Using poor tactics. You're going to have one sip.
00:04:34.000 On my second bottle. You're going to talk to me.
00:04:38.000 My mind. My mind's made of water.
00:04:42.000 My brain was a dry sponge and it's now expanding.
00:04:44.000 I can now see in four days.
00:04:47.000 I've been swimming inside of myself.
00:04:50.000 These aren't real. I didn't have enough blood.
00:04:53.000 And all I can do is force myself to make more. This person seriously down one.
00:04:55.000 He did, didn't he? It amazes me.
00:04:57.000 This is pure carbonated sparkling water.
00:05:02.000 The bubbles do hurt.
00:05:03.000 They do. It's not beer.
00:05:05.000 here. One down. 58 Jeff. Nice. I'm making progress.
00:05:15.000 I don't know how much because I don't even want to know.
00:05:17.000 I'm just going to keep pouring. You drunk half of that.
00:05:20.000 Luke, you're nowhere near anymore.
00:05:22.000 I'm getting close. Look, it's almost done.
00:05:26.000 And mine's been nice and pleasant.
00:05:28.000 You guys look horrible. It's not almost done.
00:05:30.000 It's all in the glass.
00:05:33.000 So that's how you think it works, do you?
00:05:35.000 See, now I just have to drink my nice one little glass of water and continue on.
00:05:41.000 Nice and pleasant. We're rich.
00:05:44.000 Why do we do this? Hydration.
00:05:46.000 Poor people actually couldn't do this.
00:05:48.000 This is a rich person only activity.
00:05:50.000 It's like four euros each. Yeah, probably.
00:05:55.000 So the water has been given up on.
00:05:58.000 Not really. What do you mean not really?
00:06:00.000 You're just eating things now. Watermelon.
00:06:02.000 Exactly. I'm just eating it instead of drinking it.
00:06:04.000 It's beating up the process. I'm doing both.
00:06:08.000 Where's my glass? You're on the same fucking glass!
00:06:12.000 Never ending. You're an embarrassment.
00:06:15.000 For all you know, I'm down 20 giant bottles.
00:06:18.000 But it's all just gone through this glass.
00:06:23.000 Run for that at the minute.
00:06:27.000 Luke, I'd like you to know...
00:06:29.000 If you're on fire and all it would take is my piss to extinguish you, I would still take a long walk in the cold in the middle of the night to the toilet and piss in the toilet and leave you there.
00:06:41.000 If you caught on fire right here, right now, I would drink each and every one of these balls.
00:06:49.000 Each and every one.
00:06:51.000 I would drink all of them.
00:06:54.000 Slowly. This is your lesson about dedication to the cause.
00:07:03.000 What are we doing?
00:07:06.000 Yeah! Watermelon mess!
00:07:13.000 You guys keep calling me globetard, so it seems like it.
00:07:15.000 The earth is flat, look. I follow all the flat earth papers.
00:07:18.000 Yeah, so, okay.
00:07:19.000 I mean, it's not flat.
00:07:21.000 You're a globetard.
00:07:23.000 You're a globetard. You think this isn't flat?
00:07:25.000 It's not. It's the world round.
00:07:28.000 Yes, it's a globe.
00:07:31.000 Globetard. Alright, so how's it flat then?
00:07:36.000 Prove to me it's flat. Look outside.
00:07:39.000 I see the curve.
00:07:40.000 He does his shit. I do.
00:07:42.000 I see the curve. Tell him more proof.
00:07:44.000 More proof. Did you know that not once in the history of space travel ever has any astronaut panned his camera around 360 degrees?
00:07:54.000 Not once. Why don't they?
00:07:56.000 What do you mean? Studios.
00:07:59.000 You're a globe dart. Your name should be Luke the Duke.
00:08:04.000 When I said your name is Leek.
00:08:06.000 The Geek. I thought I'd start calling him Lurrd.
00:08:12.000 Lork. Lork.
00:08:15.000 Lork the Globetar.
00:08:16.000 This is stupid. I'm not a Globetar.
00:08:19.000 You're in a space suit! You can go up there and see it's flat.
00:08:22.000 But you ain't fucking gone. It's not flat.
00:08:23.000 That's why you're Lork the Globetar.
00:08:24.000 So is space fake? Is there even space?
00:08:26.000 Space is fake. You're Lork.
00:08:29.000 So it's a dome? Space is CGI. Yeah, it's a solid dome.
00:08:32.000 I'm gonna drink so much more over that.
00:08:34.000 There's not left. I'll drink all the water on the earth.
00:08:39.000 Then what? Then you could be thirsty.
00:08:41.000 What kind of name is Lork?
00:08:43.000 That's not my name. But why is he in Lork?
00:08:45.000 That's not my name. Can everyone who watches Take Confidential please spam Lork's inbox calling him Lork?
00:08:51.000 I don't have an inbox.
00:08:52.000 Yeah he does on Instagram. He's real lucky Lork.
00:08:59.000 Tristan got slowed down by the mob.
00:09:01.000 They got you, Tristan. Ah, so you touch kids.
00:09:07.000 Literally saw it. Caught red-handed.
00:09:11.000 Can I go to my room and ignore you both?
00:09:12.000 Did you touch that kid? Can we go to our bodies to the room?
00:09:15.000 Yes, I know. Tristan, admit what happened.
00:09:18.000 We should go to the club. I'm just saying we should.
00:09:22.000 I want to get clear.
00:09:23.000 I don't want to, but I feel morally obligated.
00:09:25.000 I super don't want to.
00:09:26.000 You know, I was saying this to you the other day.
00:09:28.000 I was saying, why does a salmon swim off the river?
00:09:31.000 It just feels like it happens to you.
00:09:33.000 Why does this fan have a small heart?
00:09:35.000 I'm not sure Oh Yeah Oh
00:10:03.000 Come on
00:10:05.000 Oh Come on, let me see your hands.
00:10:05.000 One, two.
00:10:14.000 Look at my face.
00:10:26.000 Look at my face!
00:10:29.000 You don't even have to use a lotion.
00:10:32.000 You can tell me all you need just a touch.
00:10:34.000 Baby.
00:10:36.000 I'm in love.
00:10:38.000 Since sitting in school, been 17.
00:10:41.000 No one's ever touched a dream.
00:10:44.000 I guess it's me.
00:10:45.000 I should fall in love, I'm a new body.
00:10:47.000 Well, if I pay extra for the big body.
00:10:50.000 I'm a pro-dance nigga, nigga I talk.
00:10:52.000 I'm a pro-dance nigga, nigga I talk. Bless me, that's a money run.
00:10:54.000 And a chain on my neck, I got chills from the day that I.
00:10:57.000 Slept with me, when I made it up.
00:10:59.000 Looking at me, baby, like I made it up.
00:11:02.000 Crazy, I'm crazy, cause I'm wild.
00:11:03.000 I'm a pro-dance nigga, nigga I talk.
00:11:24.000 I don't think a Bugatti's ever traveled on roads like this.
00:11:47.000 It's a 4x4. Andrew, this isn't a 4x4.
00:11:50.000 It is 4-wheel drive. I'm not even sure it can go over that bridge.
00:11:54.000 We have to go to the camping because we have to realign our chakras, so it's just a 4x4.
00:11:57.000 This isn't a 4x4.
00:11:58.000 Or it could not happen to the bridge. Is it going to collapse?
00:12:00.000 Yeah, it might. And then it wants to buy a new car.
00:12:02.000 No, this is like, what, 6 million euro?
00:12:05.000 It wants to buy a new one. No, but you can't...
00:12:06.000 It's not that easy.
00:12:08.000 It's like...
00:12:10.000 It's all rocks and... stuff.
00:12:14.000 Is it gonna collapse?
00:12:24.000 Yeah.
00:12:26.000 I'm going to go to the bathroom.
00:12:28.000 you Bro, there's holes.
00:12:34.000 It's left.
00:12:44.000 No one has ever, ever, ever driven up a guy here.
00:12:55.000 Ever. Who do you mean?
00:12:57.000 Never. Never in a million years.
00:12:59.000 This isn't a 4x4. It is.
00:13:01.000 We're in like the mountain villages.
00:13:03.000 Yeah? You don't bring Bugatti's out in the mountain villages.
00:13:06.000 Why? Because even look at the mountain man looking at you being like, why does he...
00:13:10.000 They're asking why.
00:13:11.000 They're asking themselves why.
00:13:13.000 Who does this? He has so much money.
00:13:16.000 Can't afford another car. That's all I got, man.
00:13:20.000 Look at Mountain Woman.
00:13:22.000 She literally is wondering, who is this man?
00:13:25.000 That woman wants me. She does.
00:13:27.000 She probably does, to be honest.
00:13:29.000 She's curious who I am. She's super curious.
00:13:31.000 I'd be super curious. I'm the big G. I'm the big G. And there's the Mountain Man.
00:13:37.000 Fuck it. I'll race him right now.
00:13:38.000 It won't be him. Okay.
00:13:40.000 You would beat the mountain man in a race.
00:13:42.000 I admit. How about the road dips?
00:13:45.000 This is always the best off-road vehicle.
00:13:47.000 Look, just because it costs all that money doesn't mean I'm going to be like, oh, we can't go driving on terrible terrain.
00:13:51.000 That's going to ruin it. I'm not fucking gay.
00:13:55.000 That would be gay, wouldn't it?
00:13:56.000 So gay. But I definitely don't think Bugatti envisioned this when they were crafting the car.
00:14:03.000 Probably didn't envision me smoking in it either.
00:14:05.000 Or fucking driving it drunk.
00:14:07.000 Full of girls. Probably envisaged loads of shit that ain't gonna happen.
00:14:10.000 Listen. I don't adhere to the rules of the matrix.
00:14:14.000 I do things different.
00:14:17.000 This is very different.
00:14:19.000 I will admit that this is very different.
00:14:24.000 I used to go into the mountains.
00:14:27.000 Yeah, I'm gonna race now. Mountain Race is a mountain man.
00:14:35.000 This is nice.
00:14:54.000 They have internet!
00:14:56.000 We're re-aligning our shop.
00:14:58.000 There is no more internet, no more webverse.
00:15:00.000 No, there is.
00:15:02.000 We're here to live with the nature.
00:15:04.000 We're going to live with the lands.
00:15:06.000 We're going to stop living on the internet and booze in all the time.
00:15:08.000 We're going to do things for our hearts and souls.
00:15:10.000 So, phones in the grass.
00:15:12.000 in the grass.
00:15:14.000 you Listen, that looks absolutely super uncomfortable.
00:15:19.000 Look at your body. Like, look at your spine.
00:15:23.000 It's like in a sea.
00:15:25.000 It's not supposed to do that.
00:15:27.000 My spine's made of liquid mercury.
00:15:30.000 What does that mean? Does that just mean it's super dense?
00:15:32.000 Have you ever seen the Terminator? Okay, so you're the Terminator.
00:15:35.000 It flows out of a liquid state.
00:15:37.000 This looks extremely uncomfortable.
00:15:41.000 Are you comfortable?
00:15:42.000 My spine is made of solid rubber.
00:15:46.000 I thought you said it was liquid mercury.
00:15:48.000 This is the most uncomfortable chair ever.
00:15:50.000 It is, isn't it? So why are we here again?
00:15:53.000 Because there's a door. We're here to be one with nature.
00:15:56.000 Guys, look at this. Your chakras.
00:15:59.000 Shut the fuck up. Tristan, all...
00:16:01.000 I've got my chakras right here.
00:16:02.000 Exactly. Tristan, don't you understand?
00:16:04.000 We were in the club. We beat some people up.
00:16:06.000 We punched them in the face. We need to realign our chakras with the nature and the universe.
00:16:10.000 Are we putting that and take on the natural?
00:16:11.000 Yes. Okay, fine.
00:16:12.000 We beat some people up.
00:16:14.000 After we went to the club and boozing hard with a bunch of fucking whores with big tits.
00:16:17.000 And now we need to go back to base and realign with the source.
00:16:21.000 That is my fucking base.
00:16:23.000 What do you mean that's your base? Well, beating the shit out of people after hanging around a bunch of girls with big fake tics is not your fucking spiritual base.
00:16:29.000 It's been my entire life.
00:16:31.000 But... It's what I know and do best.
00:16:34.000 It's my natural state of existence.
00:16:36.000 That is the worst spiritual base ever.
00:16:37.000 Can't be a spiritual base.
00:16:39.000 It's not very spiritual. I'm not fucking happy.
00:16:40.000 Can't you just enjoy the fucking nature?
00:16:42.000 Yeah, look at the clouds. Let's count them.
00:16:48.000 You're gonna be cold. Tristan, you're also going to be cold.
00:16:52.000 You're both going to be cold. Because it's getting colder and colder.
00:16:55.000 Sun's going down. Even I've got sweats and...
00:16:58.000 There's no way a tricycle will heat you up in a way that you make unlimited heat.
00:17:06.000 But the tricycle won't help.
00:17:10.000 It's got four wheels, mate.
00:17:11.000 That's what I get a tricycle. It's bicycle training wheels, dickhead.
00:17:18.000 Okay. I don't actually know whether it's called a tricycle or not.
00:17:21.000 A tricycle with three wheels. That is clearly a bicycle with training wheels.
00:17:25.000 Isn't that the same thing?
00:17:27.000 No. Can you admit you're a monumental failure and there's not a vehicle on earth if I can't drive?
00:17:33.000 I might have to admit that.
00:17:35.000 Or this. I might have to admit that.
00:17:39.000 Emergency meeting! What do you mean there's an emergency?
00:17:42.000 You can't tricycle to the emergency.
00:17:46.000 It's not even an effective...
00:17:47.000 I can tell that that's way more effort than walking.
00:17:50.000 Well, Andy's just gliding here.
00:17:51.000 I'm walking with my big heavy legs.
00:17:52.000 Andy's just gliding along.
00:17:53.000 That's not gliding at all. I see the effort.
00:17:57.000 He's slowing down so you can keep up.
00:17:59.000 No. I'm just walking at a normal pace.
00:18:02.000 I'm not even walking fast. Now he's trying to catch up.
00:18:06.000 He's trying to speed it up.
00:18:11.000 It's off the hill now.
00:18:13.000 Oh, yeah.
00:18:15.000 I can't get it back on the hill.
00:18:17.000 I can't just pull it off.
00:18:19.000 So tricycles aren't an ineffective mode of transportation.
00:18:21.000 That's a tricycle and we all know it.
00:18:25.000 Where's the meeting? Where?
00:18:27.000 It's not an emergency. Here.
00:18:30.000 The ba- the- the goat.
00:18:33.000 Is that the emergency meeting alarm?
00:18:35.000 We have a new one. Yeah, the goat.
00:18:37.000 That's an emergency meeting. So until we sit down, it won't- we won't get it.
00:18:40.000 The emergency meeting is sitting on the balcony of that cabin.
00:18:42.000 I don't know what we're talking about. It is, isn't it?
00:18:45.000 That one. But it's clearly there.
00:18:48.000 The goat's calling us. The two goats.
00:18:51.000 Goats are aggressive, right? The emergency goats.
00:18:54.000 Are you underwear of my hands?
00:18:56.000 It reminded me of yesterday. They look like dumbasses as well.
00:19:01.000 I'll take out the fucking game, goat.
00:19:04.000 I actually think goats want beef.
00:19:06.000 I actually think he really wants it.
00:19:07.000 I'm the goat up in here.
00:19:10.000 The goat wants beef, doesn't he?
00:19:12.000 But doesn't he realize that his neck being in that position is such a...
00:19:15.000 Imagine axe kick down.
00:19:17.000 Yeah. Or up. A soccer kick up.
00:19:20.000 He wouldn't... Hey, he heard ya. We'll get more tactical, dude.
00:19:27.000 Alright, come on. Thank you, Brandon.
00:19:33.000 Thanks for the fun. Thank you.